I have a secret that is damaging my self-esteem. My pride as a man. No one knows and no one needs to know. Only my girlfriend and I know. I don't know how to overcome it. It's hurting my manhood. I cant talk it out with my family or friends out of fear of being judged by them or losing their respect.In short the secret is that I met my girlfriend at a sex party in college. I basically met her after someone else fucked her. Not that I had any plans to fall in love with her. It just happened after a long series of events that took several years. We went from FWB to normal friends, to best friends and then one day.. we became boyfriend and girlfriend, at some point it became a serious relationship. It took almost a decade.I'm not the same man from before, im more conservative now, and meanwhile i love my girlfriend and I cant complain of her as a partner. I don't know if taking her seriously is the right move. This secret is hurting my self steem and i can't tell anyone. No one in my circle know this. But I know. And i can't run away from the fact that im in love with a woman who had semen of someone else when we first met. I can't do this anymore. The more i care about her, the more i resent her for that.And i know she is going to be hurt if i dump her, we have an emotional connection beyond the physical, but I can't do this anymore. At this point its choosing between loving her and loving myself.
>>32145278You desperately need therapy
>>32145278>sex party
you need to separate sex from love.
>>32145278>im more conservative nowno you're not. conservatives have no problem with realizing you turn away from a life of sin and find your way when you get olderyou're an adult convert to posting reactionary memes with zero understanding of absolution and redemption. there's nothing virtuous about promoting your own pride and self love over everything
Holy fucking shit, OP. You are absolutely fucked up in the head, you need therapy.I do not mean harm with my words, but you are so deluded about society and yourself there is no way I can use use gentle words to describe how pathetic your situation is, it's like you have been living in a cave for two decades and is completely unaware of how modern life works. If you get rid of her, you will soon realize the reality of how modern women works: They want men that makes six figures, can give them money, are over six feet tall, have a 7 inch dick. Somebody like you would be absolutely fucked in modern dating pool. You would literally go years without even kissing somebody. Love born out of a long term friendship is the most precious and pure form of love. Most people can only find it during school, and you are too old now to ever find it again, your chances of finding somebody like that again is about 0.01%. Take my experience, I was not a sociable person during school, it took me 8 years to find a good-looking woman that is not a complete piece of misandrist shit or a single mom.Where do you think you going to find a virgin woman in 2024? In some backwoods Far Cry 5-like cult in Montana? What do you have to offer? Why do you think her father will allow her to marry a guy like you? You are not pure yourself, you already have lost your virginity, what makes you believe you are worthy of a virgin?You have two options:A) get professional help to fix your head. Understand that the times change, and the world that your parents grew up don't exist anymore and you shouldn't try to live with their values, because it's literally impossible.Or B) Go ahead, break up with her, see where you are going to end up, I assure you it's not a nice place.If you want to ignore my advice, here is a tip: Experiment making a Tinder account. Get a taste of what great life of a single reactionary man living in 2024 you are about to face.
>>32145374>Just throw away all of your self-esteem as a man and reprogram yourself from feeling bad in very natural ways because society has gone to shit and women have no regard for their men whatsoever broNTA, but this is god awful shitty advice. If you have a problem with something your partner is or has done, that's perfectly reasonable and natural. Judging people is how we hold the people around us to social norms, and the best way to deal with someone who seriously harms your self-esteem is to distance yourself from them since you can't forcibly change other people. OP has the right reaction, throwing away your pride and self-esteem for temporary happiness is just silly.The proper response is to distance yourself and find someone who fits your standards, OP. They exist, it takes all kinds to make a world out there. Locking yourself down with a person you can't respect, and who makes it to where you can't respect yourself, isn't the way.
>>32145401>feeling bad in very natural ways>being a misogynist with nonsensical views about sex is very naturalTo therapy you too. And sex ed. This behavior of demanding your woman to be a virgin is not natural, specially when you are not capable of delivering the same kind of sexual purity yourself. This thing does not develops naturally in anybody, it requires a decadent society to brainwash your mind to accommodate these values.BTW OP, feel free to take my advice of making a Tinder and seeing your chances, see how many fishes there are in the sea. Hey, it's the weekend, you should try it now, and post your extensive list of matches here for us all to see.
>>32145401You're a shining example of why small children with no relationship experience shouldn't be giving relationship advice.
>>32145436yeah, I had not considered the hypothesis that >>32145401 might be underage, and it shows.What a waste of my time.
>>32145286I know>>32145289i tried to not call it an orgy dor several reasons
>>32145292That doesn’t exist
>>32145286Yes he desperately needs some woman to syphon off all his money listening to his retarded shit.He just needs to man up and make a decision dump her or accept it. Then move on.
>>32145374>absolutely fucked up in the head, you need therapy.I know>>32145374>If you get rid of her, you will soon realize the reality of how modern women worksWhats the alternative? Staying with someone i secretly have grown to hate? Stay with her to spare her feelings? Stay with her to avoid loneliness abs desperation? Cmon.>>32145374>Love born out of a long term friendship is the most precious and pure form of lovePerhaps, thats what i told myself for years. But at some point you turn 32 and realize you are getting older. Time for games is over. I know I love the woman but i cant imagine her kissing my children when I know whete that lips have been. >>32145374>Where do you think you going to find a virgin woman in 2024?Ignorance is bliss, I know the reality of modern women but at least with other woman i wouldn't know.
>>32145558>Whats the alternative? Staying with someone i secretly have grown to hate? Stay with her to spare her feelings? Stay with her to avoid loneliness abs desperation? Cmon.No, the alternative is seeking help before you do something stupid.>I know I love the woman but i cant imagine her kissing my children when I know whete that lips have been.This. This is not normal. Normal people don't think about these stuff.Talk to a psychologist. You are giving off symptoms of Monomania, "Idée fixe" specifically.Idée Fixe is usually a coping mechanism generated by extensive childhood trauma. A psychologist will help you fix that.>Ignorance is bliss, I know the reality of modern women but at least with other woman i wouldn't know.No, it isnt. Get help to fix your intrusive thoughts now, or they will haunt you forever.If you want, talk to your girlfriend about your problem, but not in a confrontational way, do not tell her you want to break up with her. Tell you that this bothers you and that you plan to seek mental help for it, and you are going to need her support for it. This is a good opportunity to see if she really loves you.
>>32145600count.OP, did you know people take showers on a regular basis? Do you know men rubs their sweaty dicks and and hairy anuses on a daily basis to clean it off?You know, someday you will take your child to McDonalds, and the burger and the salad of that meal was made by somebody that was touching a dick, a cunt, or an anus less than 12 hours before. Someday your kid will get a cold, you will take him to a doctor, and the doctor is gonna put his finger inside your kid's mouth.Have you considered that YOU will touch your kid with the hands that touches a dick and an anus on a daily basis?How do you feel about that?Are you starting to understand what I am saying? You have a problem, you let intrusive thoughts become a fixed idea on your mind, this is not natural, this is one of the many things that therapy will help you overcome. Dumping your GF won't help you.
>go to parties to put semen in other people's wives.>complaints that his got the same treatment
>>32145558>Where do you think you going to find a virgin woman in 2024?Ignorance is bliss, I know the reality of modern women but at least with other woman i wouldn't know.A new girl isn't going to fix your problem. If anything, you'll be able to pertend for a while until you start hating her too for the exact same reason
>>32145278What is it that upsets you? That you once had sex? That your gf once had sex?
>>32145374>They want men that makes six figures, can give them money, are over six feet tall, have a 7 inch dickKek I have all these things and I'm still an incel, what do
>>32145278>I met my girlfriend at a sex party in college. I basically met her after someone else fucked her.Just one guy? Or did she fuck more than one guy at this party?She already had sex before that too, right? I mean, she probably didn't lose her virginity at this sex party, she'd had sex before. So why are you focused on the sex she had at that party? Because you happened to meet her after it?It's not about her or anything she did, it's about you - your ego, how you feel about yourself. You're insecure.Leaving her is probably a bad idea, but that's not even the main thing, whether you leave her or not. The main thing is whether you can get over this insecurity, which leaving her won't fix.
>>32145374Shut the hell up dude.
>>32145424>This behavior of demanding your woman to be a virgin is not natural,I'm the guy above that just told him to shut the hell up. And actually, no, it is, but post civilized leftist countries like the US have made it such a nigh imposing that expecting one is seen as absurd. It is unfair to demand when a man cannot maintain himself, true, but still. Plus, women don't hold male virginity in the same regard, not that there's a way for them to really know.
>>32146034>imposingImpossibility.
>>32146025>>32146034>no, it is, According to who?According to your illiterate boomer parents that thought using seatbelts and not drinking while driving was literally communism?According to a decaying society that measures a man's worth by it's capacity to provide and not by it's thoughts and feelings and idealizes an "alpha man" as a disposable machine that can work itself to death?>but post civilized leftist countriesOh, another underage child from /pol/ I see.Get off your bubble of retards and go watch some documentaries and learn more about cultures around the world. A society that puts female virginity in a pedestal is considered not evolved, it's more commonly seem nowadays in shitholes in Africa and Middle East, not in civilized countries. The more they value virginity, the more backwards they are, and this is a fact. You can't look at mudslimes in the desert who shit in bushes that will stone children to death because they were raped by their parents and tell me it's some kind of more advanced society than us because they value female virginity more. You are delusional.This is what you sound like:https://vimeo.com/ondemand/163120
