>>32172860
lift weights and stop masturbating

>>32172860
That unfortunately sounds like a "maladaptation" where you have adapted your reward mechanism to respond to neglect. It's really bad and makes you very easy to hurt and abuse. Try to reverse that shit right now

>>32172870
> lift weights and stop masturbating
I lift weights three times a week, also don’t watch porn or use anything to masturbate, just my imagination, and even then I do it twice per week on average, I’m a normal person in almost all metric, it’s just this thing that spirals me out of control

Whatcha gonna do about it? Life's short go for it

why tf do you want this chick so bad? there millions of other chicks wtf is so special of this one?

>>32172885
> life’s too short go for it
She’s way out of my league, I’m a 6/7 and she’s an 8/9, also from the celebrities she fawns over I’m not her type, my chances with her are slim at best and if I get a blatant “NO” I might actually self harm I’m not even joking (yes i know it’s pathetic )

>>32172891
Have you ever had this phenomenon where you just stop when you see a chick ? You stop, your whole body, you feel like this moment is stretching forever, and then it’s over and you want to know everything about this person, and the more you learn about them the more your heart is beating to their every move, it’s extreme infatuation, but I know it’s one sided, to her I’m an acquaintance

how long you known her? just ask her out anon

>>32172874
I don’t think it’s that, thankfully, I do have a problem but it’s not as if I get more attached the more she’s treating me like nothing, it’s the more she engages the more I like her, she has me hooked and it’s fucking with my life

>>32172912
Two months, we have no joint social circles, and it’s not that we don’t talk, it’s just that it’s over Instagram and it’s just normal talk, and it moves between her responding right as I send somthing (we usually respond in delays ) and being interested to her not responding for a day and being dry af, also I try to talk to her about her interests so she’ll be into the convo, she didn’t really try to get to know me

>>32172914
sounds like you are lonely and her engagement is making you obsessed with her because there’s no one else. Just ask her out or reveal your crush on her. If she rejects move tf on. If she likes you too, congrats you have a potential lover

but whining over it on here is fucking retarded nigger behavior

>>32172941
Lonely ? Idk I don’t think I’m lonely, romanticly yeah I’ve been single for a while
> Just ask her out or reveal your crush on her
I don’t think I can face the rejection, and as time goes by my chance of getting a yes is increasing so I can’t make this move while knowing I’ll get a better chance tomorrow

>>32172955
NTA but i think they mean you sound romanticly lonely

>>32172976
Oh then yeah I’m romanticly lonely

you sound retarded

>>32172860
yea. its only unhealthy if the chick youre thinking about isn't into you. but if she is shes probably doing the same about you. go talk to her

>>32172997
Uhh… I am, when a girl like this comes into my life I spiral out of control, this instance is a really strong one and the spiral is massive? I’ve barely held it together

>>32173010
I don’t think she’s into me, or rather I don’t think she sees me as more then a friend, at least for now

>>32172860
stop simping, son. have you ever heard tell of how dogs love to be chased when they get out the front door, and won’t stop no matter how much you call after them, yet as soon as you turn and run from them, they come after you?
stop running after her son. if she wants you, she’ll run after you.

>>32172860
a specific broad? not fi you havent been in a relationship with her. drop all oneitis shit immediatley. its a perversion of male and female dynamics and will only hurt you as a man. forget about broads for a while if that is the case. do your thing , improve your life, and talk to the broads that are attracted to you more than you are attracted to them. the quickest way to be destroyed as a man is putting a woman above yourself

>>32172860
>Is it normal to want a chick so bad That she occupies your mind almost 24/7?
One specific woman or just any woman in general? There was one woman I had a crush so bad it was annoying. If we were both at a party I'd always know where she was in the room. I kept it hidden for a long time because she had a kid and I had a GF. When I broke up and she had completely kicked to daddy-baby out of her life I finally courted her and discussed my obsession with her. She eventually said "no" which broke the spell. And now, nearly 20 years later, I'm so fucking glad she did.

I'm the same, OP. I've known her for 3 years at work but recently started talking to her more the past 6 months and 2 months ago I realized I was having a massive crush.
My problem is this is a coworker so it just feels to weird to ask her out.

>>32172860
you gotta womanize and get rid of this mentality. you cant be a man and exist in this state. go after women that want you not the other way around. its a numbers game if she doesnt like you know you are wasting you time, dont wait for the perfect moment, make a move and move on if she doesnt reciprocate. you got any friends?

>>32172860
The term "oneitis" was invented about 25 years ago.

>>32172892
It takes time for that heart to accept what the mind already knows. You already know she's going to say no but your heart is in denial. Ask her out so you can fully finally come to terms with the reality of the situation. Your heart is stupid. The brain does all the calculations. Your brain has come to the conclusion that there's a 99.9% chance she will say no. But your heart says that if there's a .01% chance she will say yes then cling to that hope. It seems you are a hopeless romantic. A person that clings to hope and faith in the most despairing situations. That's a good thing, but it's unhealthy in this case. This will turn into an obsession. Just go through with it so she can say no and you can fully come to terms with the reality of the situation.

>>32172860
>Is it normal to want a chick so bad That she occupies your mind almost 24/7?
Nope
>While sometimes barely giving you the time of day ?
Extra nope

You should probably change those feels

>>32172860
Yes. Her indifference makes you desire her validation. You want to prove yourself to her. But what would you do with yourself one you had her?

its normal when youre a junior in high school but not long after that its time to get yourself together and get some perspective

>>32174096
I’m not simping, It’s not like I don’t recognize her faults or think they don’t matter, I want her in spite of those faults

>>32175146
wrong answer buddy. make a move orcut it off now.

>>32174115
> the quickest way to be destroyed as a man is putting a woman above yourself
But she is better then me, and I can’t stop thinking about her, I’ve taken a break from talking to her and Instagram in general, im gonna try and keep at it for two weeks, im currently 6 in and I can’t stop thinking about her

>>32174425
Ifs one specific woman, I don’t obsess about every hot woman I meet, it’s more just about if there’s that click between us

Look up limerence.

>>32172860
How about let 24 chicks each occupy your mind for one hour apiece every day?

>>32174497
Uhh… I’m the OG OP
We haven’t met at work just saw her sometimes and then followed her on insta and started talking there

>>32175165
>But she is better then me
wrong

cut her off completely and block her if you have to. get any delusions out of your head and dont ruminate over it.

>>32175146
>I'm not simping
>goes on to explain that he is, in fact, simping

>>32174519
> go after women that want you not the other way around
I’m trying, I’m flirting with this hot chick at work but Its not the same as with her, it’s less meaningful, my heart is less into it
> you got any friends?
Yeah, why ?

>>32174525
> This will turn into an obsession
I think im already there

> Just go through with it so she can say no and you can fully come to terms with the reality of the situation.
I don’t think I can deal with the reality of the situation

>>32174560
> You should probably change those feels
But how

>>32174586
I don’t want her validation, I want her affection, as to what I’ll do if I have her ? Be happy ? Enjoy the relationship?

>>32175153
But what if she’ll say no?
When she dosnt answer me for a bit I spiral,so rejection will come with intense spiraling and I don’t know if I’ll be able to get back up

>>32172860
I guess it's normal to have that experience at some point in your life once, but it's a problem. If you can't pull the trigger on this chick, you should probably get your ass out of there. Literally stop jerking off cause you probably do. Work on yourself and shift your focus away from women (it's really not that hard) and there is a serious chance that will improve your success with them anyway (though that's not the point and again, don't focus on that).

>>32172884
>just my imagination
that's just as bad as porn, fantastical and not real. You're not actually sleeping with the chick you're imagining sleeping with. Stop doing it altogether.

I've recently started asking myself "am I the father I would want my future kids to have?" and it's worked out for me pretty well. My dad is a great father, even still in my 20s and now my best friend, wasn't and isn't some fuckin gooner, so I'd like to also not be one.

>>32172892
There is no league dude and number ratings are fucking retarded. "I'm like a 1 and shes like a 20/10 bro I can't bro" you sound like a woman: neurotic and insecure. Stop being so vain and conceited, in all reality your looks are probably fine, just like mine and anyone else's, you just need to drop the idea that people give shit about you and what you look like. When you go out in public nobody will remember you or care, so why do you care? Hit this chick up, chances are you're not the only one doing it and it's a common thing for her, so she probably won't really care all that much.

STOP GIVING A SHIT. That is all.

>>32175289
> shift your focus away from women
I don’t focus on women, I usually don’t care about most of them in a romantic way, but sometimes I find one that I can’t get my eyes off, and that’s where it starts

> that's just as bad as porn
how do you figure that out ?

> Stop doing it altogether
Tried and I became miserable and even after 60 days without it when I had some serenity it was always in my mind, at least now it’s healthy and I don’t chase after it, if you think your dad dosnt jerkoff/ has sex regularly either you’re very religious or just refusing to see reality (which makes you kinda similar to me)

> in all reality your looks are probably fine
I know they’re “fine” but I also know I’m not her type and I’m not hot enough to move around it

> so she probably won't really care all that much.
I’m not afraid of ppl knowing she rejected me, I'm afraid of the rejection itself and what it’ll do to me

> STOP GIVING A SHIT. That is all.
I would if I could

>>32172860
Such behaviour is normal for basement-dwelling incel subhumans, yes.

>>32175345
> basement-dwelling
I don’t have a basement
> incel subhumans
How can I be both an incel and want to date her

>>32175211
>Yeah, why ?
they get girls? observe what they do and you'll see why what you're doing is highly illogical.

>>32175254
then you move on with your life with satisfaction of knowing its over. this is an unhealthy obsession and you should treat it as serious as fucking cancer.

>>32175394
They either don’t get girls, only hookup or have a stable relationship for 3 years, non of them is in my shoes

>>32175400
I don’t think you can get satisfaction from this, I’d rather be her friends and fawn over her behind her back then to get rejected by her

>>32175344
>bunch of neurotic shit
>I would if I could (stop giving a shit)

Then sit in denial idk what to tell you, your outlook is everything.

Oh and I said my dad isn't a fuckin gooner, not that he doesn't have sex/jerk off once in a while. My point still stands, you're a desperate insecure loner when you could be a self sufficient man that isn't afraid to stand alone.

You mfs are all the same

>help i am a lonely faggot that daydreams about sex i dont have
>gets advice
>no but im going to refute every piece of advice you gave me
>also i am going to insult you

Then chase poon, never get any, and die alone with nothing, idgaf.

sounds like narc abuse to me...? and really actually everyone with any qualifications really... like phd's. It may be because of a distinct lack of direct communcation... you're getting teased endlessly... goddman that's so fucking hot baby

>>32175536
the satisfaction is you have an answer and get to move on with your life. this ho is no different form any other women alive. if she gives signals that she likes you move in if not ,disregard her and move on. stop trying to hold onto an obsession that isnt going to go anywhere. it doesnt work bro , it never has. stop wasting whats left of your youth.

>>32175536
women are incapable of love

it's just infatuation
you think about them and your brain chemicals do their thing
you'll get over it in a couple weeks
just feel your feelings and take a step back if you get too lost in the sauce

this>>32175621
real love is nothing like this at all

>>32172860

No. That's not normal. That's called obsession. You need to seek help before you turn into a crazed stalker and ruin your life.

>>32172860
i hope this doesn't end the way it usually goes.
but you might MIGHT be onto one rough ride.
a ride that will break you.

it is normal. most men experience with at least one or two girls and all of them learn it in excruciatingly painful way.

you will no longer suffer so much from these once you learn to find love within rather than outside of you.

if you find peace and security in yourself you wouldn't be raging all day or be hell-bent at obtaining and fulfilling your bodily needs or emotional needs of "needing" someone to feel complete.

don't search outside of you for love.

>>32175604
truly. that's the conclusion i came to. it's not that really it's just the conception of love a man has or has written is fucking alien to them. Sorry.

>>32175146
>I want her in spite of those faults
I believe this is called limerance, and it's not healthy. That said, I've definitley been in the exact situation before, I think it's pretty common.