in a way. He's been raised by a single mother and pampered all his life. Despite that, he's very masculine in looks and behavior though.However, he's kind of jealous and has said before that he'd like me to treat him and show the same affection I show to animals. Which is...understandable as I'm all over them constantly. I see why he'd think this is a more intense love/affection, and it can be from one perspective. But then it's entirely platonic and maternal as these are helpless adorable beings and I love stuffing my face into their fur/feathers. If I had similar feelings towards him we wouldn't be able to have the relationship we have. Yet I still feel guilty a bit that I can't bring myself to be as warm and snuggly with him, i prefer more provocative and power plays for sexual tension. I'll only switch to motherly when he's sick and I have to care for him, kinda unlucky for him he's usually healthy as a horse so there's rarely the need for it lolis this typical for men to wish this?
>>32321306Sounds more like he needs therapy for those issues rather than someone fulfilling a motherly role for him. I mean, softer affection, sure that's one thing, but if I'm reading this right he's asking for something closer to infantilization. He might have a desire for nurturing, maybe because that's what gave him positive impressions as a kid or the opposite, that he feels deprived of them, but either way it's best analyzed by a professional so that it can manifest or be dealt with in a healthy manner. No matter how much you care for him, you can't fix those issues and attachments, he has to with professional guidance. I wouldn't say it's entirely uncommon, but poor parenting, mental illness from childhood trauma or neglect, and a deprived upbringing isn't uncommon either.
>>32321306no
How old are you both How'd u meet and where do you live? I'm gonna shoot myself in the heart partially because nothing like this is in the cards for me and you're allowed to know it
>>32321306DESU, being provocative and sexual 24/7 sound kinda like a chore. I'd like it if the girl I'm dating is able to do both. Sometimes, warm affection and snuggles are nice. I'm not sure what this has to do with mommy issues, though cuddling and being generally snuggly with your partner is normal in my experience. I often have the same feelings and urge toward my girlfriend that I do to my cat. Example: I get the urge to squeeze and snuggle them both, and that translates to me squeezing my gf as I hug her pretty much every time. Same with my cat, I'll pick him up and give him a big hug and cuddle when I come home. I like it when my gf treats me in the same way.Nothing to do with mommy issues.
>>32321306>is this typical for men to wish this?Yes, though most of us won’t admit it – for good reason, we’re adult men and we have a role to fulfill as provider and protector, which we enjoy. But deep down in even the most coldest and hardest of men is a little boy who still loves being cuddled and pampered. We all got an inner child in us, men are no exception. That being said though, we don’t want it 100% of the time. Maybe 5 ~ 10% of the time at most. 90% of the time we prefer being a hard-as-rock manly man. But god damn I really love being ‘little spoon’ sometimes. I can’t even lie.
>>32321306I'm playing armchair psychologist here so don't take anything I say as anything remotely close to factIt sounds like that is the only "love" he can recognize. Someone nurturing him and not seeing him as a sexual being at all.Ime men need both. They want to feel like you need them because they're big, strong, level headed, and intelligent, but they also sometimes want to feel like your special boy.
>>32321336>Man wants to have snuggly cuddles and to be mothered>”HE NEEDS THERAPY”>Woman wants to be called a ‘little’, have ‘CnC’ sex and calls her BF ‘daddy’>”Perfectly fine!”Absolutely ridiculous. Men can enjoy being all cute too you know. Women get to act all cute and adorable 24/7 in most aspects of life, no one cares. For us men we have to be tough and solid and stoic 24/7, and the one place we can mask off and be vulnerable, a relationship with someone we trust and love, you’re saying we need ‘professional help’ for daring to be kiddish and cute? Come the hell on. Get a grip and stop appealing to weird pseudo-psychyatric BS you made up.
>>32321797yeah definitely not 24/7, but like some teasing here and there to build tension even if sex doesn't happen daily. We're like teasing playful friends otherwise with a hint of masculine domination from his part, which is hot.
>>32321797I often have the same feelings and urge toward my girlfriend that I do to my catInteresting. I like cuddling and hugging him too, we do that often, but that's about it. I won't baby/pet talk him I would feel like a pedo. I also tend to rub my face on my cat's fur , my boyfriend is hairy too but it's a different type of hair, not smooth, still, it's hot during sexy times.
>>32322013How old are you and how did you meet
>>32322028I'm 33 and he's 30we met on Tinder lol and have been together for 4 years almost
>>32322013>>32321996Anon, how would you feel if your bf cried? reason doesn't matter.
>>32322092He already did at the start of our relationship, shed some tears. I didn't have anything to say for comfort desu (was holding back my own tears) so I just hugged him and caressed his face and stood like that for a while until it passed.I don't think any less of him because of this, I actually appreciate he trusted me with this vulnerability which is entirely human. Unfortunately Im typically a more cold person and incapable of comforting crying or sad people as I just detach from the situation. But just hugging him, in silence, is something I learnt from him
>>32321306Idk how you do things and process things but my mother always showed way more love to the dog than she did to her husband or children. This was because my mom was an evil frigid monster and this also showed through in other aspects of her character. Her love of animals mainly stemmed from the fact that they can't resist or dissent, and are always eager to please.I hope none of this applies to you, but still, it is good to consider your love habits carefully.
>>32322112That's good, I'm glad you didn't think less of him, and from what you're saying, I think your bf seems normal. Perhaps your natural coldness might be related to you not being as snuggly with him as he'd like?
>>32322283>>32322092>>32321855I imagine you as 28 year old balding mixed-race basedboy obsessed with marvel
>>32321336Bitch literally admits to being provactive and arguing with him in "power plays" and you say he needs therapy? Fuck you, femoid.
>>32322215I'm scared of turning out like that towards my children.>Her love of animals mainly stemmed from the fact that they can't resist or dissent, and are always eager to please.cats arent eager that eager to please, but small children can be.I'm sorry to hear about your relationship with your mother, anon. Could you elaborate a bit more about the differences in treatment and affection she showed?
>>32321306there's no reason why your erotic/romantic love to him can't also have a tinge of nurturing
>>32321306>is this typicalno but there's nothing wrong with it. if you don't want to cater to his needs just break up with him, it would be better for both of you in the long run.
