>>32323386
First off, confident is good, but cocky is not good. Dial it back because you're trying too hard and people won't appreciate it.
Secondly, it becomes real at the point you're no longer pretending and it's genuinely you. That could be in five years or in five minutes, it depends entirely on the person. And also on your starting point. Just how far gone were you?

>>32323394
I have hated myself deeply for 15 years with my only moments of confidence being alcohol induced. I’ve never experienced it sober in my adult life. But for a solid month I’ve been walking around like im the king of the world, head high, hard eye contact, direct speech, and have noticed good results. I just don’t want it to be a conscious thing and for it to be my normal self, which has always been a tepid, shy man.

>>32323386
When you start believing it.

>fake it
>start to make it
>no longer faking it

Like this

>>32323386

Fake it til you make it doesn't mean if you pretend to be confident you'll miraculous just be confident one day.

It means to fain competence, while you (and this is the essential part) go to the active effort to acquire it. So, for example if you have just been promoted to a supervisor role but you don't know what you're doing yet, you should distract from your incompetence and work diligently to acquire the skills necessary for that position in a timely manner.

In terms of confidence, it means you can pretend to be confident (no one will buy it) while you work through the issues that are causing you to not be genuinely confident. Once you have resolved those issues, you will be able to build genuine confidence.

This is not an overnight process, we're talking 6 months to a year depending on how much effort you put in on the backend to actively improve yourself.

>>32323855
>fain
The word you were probably thinking of is "feign". "Fain" means "gladly" or "willingly".

>>32323855
>Fake it til you make it doesn't mean if you pretend to be confident you'll miraculous just be confident one day.
When it comes to behavioral changes it does mean that though. By actively choosing to behave like the person you wish to be you're reinforcing the neural pathways in your brain that are associated with that behaviour until it becomes your default mindset.

>>32324081
>Fain
Cool. Learned a new word today.

>>32323386
>when does it become real?
when you start having thoughts like "wtf, was i a repressed extrovert this whole time?"