We went our separate ways with her staying at Uni and me going elsewhere for Grad, and even though we spent time with each other the previous year and over the summer, though we never officialized anything since it was going to inevitably end soon. Surprise. The feelings didn't go away and I spent the entire fall semester cloistered away and not making new friends because I was still stuck on her and mentally couldn't move on. Saw each other for New Years and I basically said as much, and she said she still felt things for me too, albeit she has managed to move on with life. We agreed our situation made it impossible for us to really be anything, but we promised to still be friends.All my other relationships ended with pretty clean cuts but this one is still lingering on and I don't know if that's going to fuck me up since I feel like I'm always going to still be hung up on her as long as she doesn't totally cut me off.
It sounds like you’re in a really tough spot, and it’s understandable why you’d feel stuck. Staying friends with an ex can sometimes work, but it depends a lot on both people’s ability to heal and move on in their own way. Since you still have feelings for her and feel like you're unable to move forward, being friends right now might actually keep you stuck in that cycle of longing, especially if you’re holding onto hope for something more.The fact that you’re still emotionally tied to her and she’s been able to move on suggests that you might need some space to process things on your own. It’s tough to truly move on if you're constantly in contact with someone who still holds that emotional weight for you. It might be helpful to take a break from the friendship, or at least create some distance. Give yourself time to heal and regain your own sense of self, without the emotional pull of her being a part of your daily life. It’s okay to need that space to focus on your own growth and well-being.Moving forward, it’s important to prioritize your mental and emotional health. If staying in contact with her is interfering with that, it's okay to set boundaries that are right for you, even if it means stepping away for a while.
>>32596642fuck you robonigger.
>>32596635Tldr>Does being friends after works?No
>>32596635No.
>>32596635No.I was only ever 'friends' with one ex, and that was after we accidentally met nearly 10 years after breaking up. We still fucked until I found a gf and she a bf, then I got blocked out of the blue, probably his insecurity.It just doesn't work.
if you are over her, and she is over you it can work. but it sounds like that is not the casedoubt you will listen, but you need to cut ties at least for a while
even if you are serious about "just being friends" the problem won't be you both, it's your future gf or her future bf that will raise an eyebrow knowing there is still contact with an ex, like what happened to this anon >>32598456
>>32598456>probably his insecurityyeah, totally unjustified
>>32596635I tried this with an ex who was still into me. We were FWB for a while; tried dating again; went back to FWB; and finally decided that this was probably unhealthy and preventing us from moving on. This over the course of like 6 years. Now we are just friends--no sex--and it's working out okay. I'm a little worried that she will have trouble finding someone else without constantly comparing them to me. I would say it's not worth it, and it's only kind of worked out in my case because she's autistic and determined to stay friends no matter what.
>>32596635sometimes, quite rare but it happens, having feelings for her doesn't help so you probably should just cut it off completely
>>32596635Staying friends absolutely can work, and very often does. But in your case, I don't think it's going to. If the two of you still have romantic feelings for each other, continuing to see each other will prolong that. If you ever get to the point where neither of you has romantic feelings any more, *then* you can be friends.
>>32598456>>32598960I guess I should clarify we aren’t exes because we were never actually gf/bf to begin with, just really close friends, without the relationship labels since we never made it into anything serious. So the whole “being friends who like each other but can’t have each other” thing already has precedence, although I always harbored wishes that it would become something more even though the rational part of me knew/knows that wasn’t/isn’t really possible. So the emotional side of me that still wants her is what is debilitating me.I might just sort of “softly” cut her off even though I do like her company and I really don’t want to.
