Last week was awful, but this week surprisingly didn't suck as much. Wishing the same to everyone else.

I have an interview today for a job I'll start in May after I graduate. I'm so scared. My mom told me I'll never make it, my classmates treat me like shit, the instructors such with me for how I talk and socialize. I need to get out of here. I need to do good on this

>>32603591
I still miss my ex-girlfriend but I don't think she gives a fuck about me

I fell for the STEM meme, I hate science but now I have a major and a master's degree so might as well get an engineering job. Guess I'll just do something I hate for the rest of my life until I retire.

I thought being almost 40 would mean she was mature, but it turns out that she handles rejection like a teenage incel. Good-fucking-riddance.

>>32603837
She probably does?

life is too short to be constantly pacified I will overcome this pacification and find glory and honor

just had a date with a cute waitress. I had the feeling it didn't go well and I was spilling my guts but she aksed to plan a next date which seems like a good sign really. maybe my perception is fucked but my god she's so beautiful. more in a cute way than a stunning way but still. long light blonde hair, pale, blue eyes. the typical archetype really, which I normally would find too bland but here we are. she's 22 and I'm 30. this is the pitfall. I was honest about it and she didn't seem to mind but it's still in my head and makes me nervous

>>32603919
>I was honest about it and she didn't seem to mind but it's still in my head and makes me nervous
If she wants to go on another date, she clearly does not give a fuck. Good luck anon, sounds like you have a chance here.

>>32603922
thanks bro. I guess I fell for and internalised the feminist programming and I'm scared to be seen as a weirdo or predator even if it's retarded. she's pretty youthful looking too. idk i'm probably overthinking this and just need to go with it

>>32603919
Nicely done bro how did you meet her and ask her out? Good luck, rooting for ya

>>32603940
she's a waitress/barista at this place where I go to code for a few hours the days I work from home. she tried to make some small tak a few times but I mostly interpreted it as just being friendly and didn't really entertain it. but I noticed her looking from time to time and when our eyes meet I could feel something there. I figured I was just being delusional tbf but then I mustered up the courage to ask her out and it went pretty well despite me embarrassing myself a bit

moral of the story ig is when you think a girl is giving you signs it's better to roll the dice

>>32603967
Holy shit that's awesome anon. I need to go code at Starbucks or something, I thought that was just a meme.

deep down, I'm still a nigga

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Over the last 10 years I've turned my healthy relationship with my brother into one where he absolutely hates me. I moved out after I graduated high school, moved across the country, and I've lived there for about 10 years. I only get to see my brother twice a year now. When I first moved out, we used to call every 2 weeks or so, but for the last couple years he doesn't wanna call any more. Within the last month he completely stopped responding to my texts.
He had a difficult time last year, lost his car and his girlfriend and his job, something I just went through the year before. When i was going through a hard time, he reached out to help me, and out of anger I pushed him away. Now that he's going through a hard time, I tried to be there for him, but he won't accept my help either. I saw him over the holidays, and at one point he lashed out at me and we had a fight. After the fight he said he doesnt get along with me, and I said I dont get along with him either but I still love him. I didnt mean for that to sever our bond but he hasnt spoken to me a single time since then.
I feel like a complete failure of an older brother. I feel like I've abandoned him by moving so far away. We used to be very close but I don't know anything about who he is anymore. I just feel that he's hurting and I can't help him in any way. I owe him an apology for pushing him away when he offered to help me, but I don't know how to make him hear it and understand it from where he is now. I wish I had said it sooner. Hopefully everything will be okay.

>>32604011
Why don't you send him this text?

>>32603881
I don't think she hates me. I just don't think she was as invested in me as I was in her. She felt bad for leaving me because I did nothing wrong, and it was a short relationship, but I still grew really attached to her. I don't think that she has that level of attachment (I thought she did, why else would we be rushing into a relationship) but then again I really don't know what's going on in her head.

>>32603992
It is a meme and you'll look like the nerd from Wild Hogs if you do it

>>32604023
idk maybe I'll send him something later but I don't wanna be annoying. Haven't tried texting him in almost 2 weeks though so yeah maybe

So bored at the office. I don't even need to be here, my bosses haven't even talked to me since I got here which I'm thankful for but for gods sake why can't I work from home?
I could be playing Underrail between tasks. Instead I'm playing some bootleg .io pirate game and I'm at the top of the leaderboard. Does it feel good? No, these are probably punk ass kids and they're probably stupid as fuck. Or they're 30 year old wageslaves like me stealing company time. Either way they're stupid as fuck.

>>32604011
>>32604047
Over the last 10 years I've turned my healthy relationship with you into one where you absolutely hate me. I moved out after I graduated high school, moved across the country, and I've lived there for about 10 years. I only get to see you twice a year now. When I first moved out, we used to call every 2 weeks or so, but for the last couple years you don't wanna call any more. Within the last month you completely stopped responding to my texts.
You had a difficult time last year, lost your car and your girlfriend and your job, something I just went through the year before. When I was going through a hard time, you reached out to help me, and out of anger I pushed you away. Now that you're going through a hard time, I tried to be there for you, but you won't accept my help either. I saw you over the holidays, and at one point you lashed out at me and we had a fight. After the fight you said you don't get along with me, and I said I don't get along with you either but I still love you. I didn't mean for that to sever our bond but he hasn't spoken to me a single time since then.
I feel like a complete failure of an older brother. I feel like I've abandoned you by moving so far away. We used to be very close but I don't know anything about who you are anymore. I just feel that you're hurting and I can't help you in any way. I owe you an apology for pushing you away when you offered to help me, but I don't know how to make you hear it and understand it from where you are now. I wish I had said it sooner. Hopefully everything will be okay.

>>32603992
ngl I always thought coding was pussy repellent. maybe less so here in the EU than overseas but still I'd never assume it impresses girls. I think it's more a question of just going out. it's always better to put yourself out there. a friend struggled for a few years on the apps and then meets his gf in the library. you never know. next time you code don't stay inside bro

I know more than just "a brief history" of their people because they have only been around for less than 80 years. The land they occupied was not that of a competent, civilization. It was just a group of people that existed there, it was ripe for the taking by someone that could actually run a country. Their entire organization fell apart when their ruling empire fell, they weren't a coherent group of people even capable of claiming the land as their own so the winning side called the shots. You can't have more than "a brief history" of a people when their recognized existence was less than 80 years ago, 25 years after they've been "occupied". You're just retroactively making a group of people a "country" when they never were one. They had no unified leadership, they had no claims of land, they had nothing of the sort. So how could they lose it? It was never theirs to begin with.

Then they spend the last 80 years acting like a bunch of fuckfaces, being aggressors in wars trying to genocide multiple religious groups. Their people backed a group of people that actively called for genocide of another. They start wars wherever they go in the name of their religion. The vast majority of them are in support of atrocities. And i'm the odd one out because I don't support terrorism as a form of diplomacy? They have caused all their own problems by being a group of violent, literal retards. They are incapable of living peacefully among their neighbors and are being dealt with in exactly the they should be by their own actions. If needed to accept that it was never "their" land in the first place, and anyone was free to move in. They chose to not live peacefully with the new inhabitants. They could have, but they didn't.

Using my dreams to ridicule me or question my logic is annoying at best. More so, you are not here to educate me, I'm here to educate you. Remember, I am not joining you, you are joining me.

They only thing in this world you should fear is me.

>>32604059
Geez you're really determined to make me send that to him aren't you

>>32604066
True that, just allowing yourself to be seen and judged by others does a lot more than staying home ever will.

>>32604103
right. that's what I'm always telling everyone who wants to listen. the apps are terrible for most men. there's no logic to it as well. I know handsome who failed on there because women either used them for a quick validation boost or they were scared of being catfished or played. to eat off the apps you need to have the perfect combination of looks and normie behaviour/pictures and luck with the algorithm

that sounds like a horrible deal for any man. you have to play the social game

I finished the marathon in last place and I'm not even quite sure I did finish the marathon

>>32603910
Life is too short too—ack!

>>32603714
Aced my interview. They're sending a job offer soon and said im a great candidate, highly motivated, great resume and people skills. I'm in total shock.
My whole life people treat me like I'm such an awkward weirdo, the head of the department said im exactly what they're looking for.
We did it bros.

>got interview tomorrow for a job i actually want
>done no preparations yet
>on the other hand my apartment have never been this clean
why on earth do i self sabotage so much?
i fucking hate myself

>>32604214
Practice right now, Practice!

I don’t know what I shit out but it was definitely in there sideways.

I've developed some nervous tics and one of them is saying the n word compulsively. I'm always really distressed and paranoid about it especially that my neighbors can hear me. It always comes out in a normal speaking volume even when I try to be quiet. Sometimes it even slips out in the car or a parking lot and I'm afraid a black person is going to beat the crap out of me. I'm under a lot of stress right now, having nightmares every night and trying to quit alcohol too. Also, I'm going to have to work as a receptionist soon and that's really stressing me out
Anyone here have experience stopping nervous tics without therapy or meds?

>>32604167
kek

It's amazing how the UN rights "expert" calling for the war in gaza a genocide just happens to be part of an Arab organization think tank. She literally gets paid for Arab public relations and somehow finds herself an expert in the UN. Someone getting paid by Arab nations to be their advocate FOR SOME REASON finds the arab states totally innocent.

It's like the CNN senior editor won't allow any negative stories about arabs, even to the point that she denies Islam had nothing to do with the Charlie Hebdo attacks. UK should just bend over and take arab immigrant dick up the ass.

Or that british soldier who famously transitioned into an islamic woman. Europe has been absolutely mind fucked by the middle east and I have no idea why.

>>32604214
What kind of job? I can help with some practice interview questions if you want

When I eat lemons the lemons eat me

>>32604311
That is what Ishmael is for.

I'm kind of glad my relationship is over. I've known she was abusive for a long time but like everyone who is abused I couldn't leave even when I knew I should and was unhappy. If I'm being honest I've been unhappy for a while. Shes difficult to be around and I've not been physically attracted to her for a long time, my love for her as the person she is during the good times was doing a lot of the heavy lifting in our sex life and our relationship in general. The hilarious thing is we're both heading to the wrong side of 40 and she thinks she can pick her life up like she in her 20s again, except now she's 150lb heavier and sagging in all the wrong places. She walked around the corner this morning and she looked almost exactly like her mother which is a cold bucket of water if I've ever seen one so I'm dodging a bullet I suppose. The main thing I'm having difficulty with is that I'm used to her talking almost constantly and the silence and having no one to talk to is hard to cope with. I used to value the silence when I got it but now I just desperately want someone to talk to. None of my friends are particularly chatty but I've not had to build any kind of friend network online because we had each other and now I have nothing really. I miss the affection as well. For 15 years we were basically in almost constant physical contact in some way and now thats just been stripped away. My whole life has been altered into something unrecognizable in less than a week and I don't know what to do. I'm relieved, depressed, happy, optimistic, lonely and apprehension all at the same time and its exhausting.

>my ex is begging for sex on /soc/ and lying about his age over a year later
Sad shit I'm not even going to expose him because chances are nobody added his sad ass anyways. I looked at my block list and his profile picture looks so rough. He looks like he's on meth. Wow

>>32604374
>still goes on /soc/
I hope your next meth addict boyfriend treats you better, kek.

>>32604411
I don't get what you were trying to say here

I'm very aware that the girl I like is a whore. When she was younger she loved the attention should we get from the various chan boards and posting her underage lewds. She only liked me because I was kinda famous at the time and she wanted my attention. But then she got her first major job at 17 because the head of the studio wanted to fuck her (and she admitted it to me a year after) even though the guy was twice her age, married, and had two kids. His wife was also her bestfriend, so not only did she fuck her boss to get the job she ruined the marriage of her best friend. The guy was also quite famous in his country so she attached to him immediately and forgot all about me.

She did this quite a few times. Every job position she has gotten has because she was fucking the boss. She broke up with her last "boyfriend" a few years ago and lost her job right after (because he was the boss, again).

She's not the only girl that I've known to be like this. In college my bestfriend was a girl that absolutely adored me and we would hang out everywhere. It was completely platonic even though I thought she was pretty, she had a boyfriend and I respected that. The only reason she hung out with me is because I had so many social media followers and had a lot of influence. She saw me as a minor celebrity and that made me cool to her. Right around graduation she met another guy that was even more well known than me and she dumped her boyfriend and moved in with him as soon as she could. She stopped talking to me completely. It's like when these girls meet someone more popular than their last interest you completely cease to exist to them. For no reason at all she stopped talking to me, would always reply with 'oh I was just about to leave message me later." or "I'm about to shower message me later." or "I was just about to go to bed" and then she would never reply later.

I hope my day gets better.

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>>32604451
I hope it does too. My friend sent me this picture and it made me smile. Maybe it'll make you smile

My vengeance will be so violent, so absolutely thorough and shocking that the will write about it for centuries to come. Every single person that lied to me, anyone that could have ended this sooner, they will all be stricken from this Earth.

helloooo I am psychically contacting you

>>32604451
I hope your day gets better too

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mp4DT3QYStA

We'll have to make some space to talk more privately

asked a guy out and got rejected

my life sucks so bad

I'm so jealous of your scars and every time I see them I feel like an impostor. I want to bleed for you and prove myself

I have another hour at my retail job and every junkie in the city is coming in harassing me about damage to items. Everything here is used. I can't magically make shit new

If the situation is -contrived- to make me always be the one in the wrong, then eventually my brain is going to stop feeling bad for being in the wrong

Oh man I should have seen that coming, but in all fairness you really shouldn't have smiled at me like that especially after rejecting me. I know people so well lol.

You can't even remotely say that I'm the same as trump. I've never paid for sex, I've never tried to cover up illicit bank records, I'm not a criminal. Well, I mean, I am but only out of necessity. But if the court knew everything that was going on (which they fucking did) then I 100% would have not been convicted. The torture, the lies, all of it is absolutely terrible. it was absolutely some form of entrapment or self defense. I actually have no idea how it would be legally termed, but my situation is so extreme that no one would have blamed me or see me as guilty.

So never compare me to him. He's a fucking retard that has never had a hard day in his life. From birth he was given everything, while I am the complete opposite. From birth I have been tested and tried. There's no telling how successful I would actually have been if my life wasn't completely controlled. I clearly have the power to move the entire planet, so if I were a free man then god knows what I would be capable of.

man cannot survive by lemon alone

>need a fucking job
>my trade is just nothing fucking hiring
>boomer dad says 'Join a union!'
>union fees are high but tough it out while they give me NO WORK for being 'the new guy'
>My money is running out i can't afford rent and shitty union fees
>try to talk to someone about getting anything at all
'Sorry kid I got nothing for (insert trade) thats (old guys) territory!
>old guy does want to train or let anyone shadow him on any job or else he will 'loose business'

How do I go forward without just killing people?

>>32605244
Bribery

I had a crush on a cute coworker of mine and she rejected me hard. I can't handle it because she was my shining star in the hell of my life, and instead of listening to my brain screaming at me not to do it I did. I can't go back to innocently pinning after her and using that motivation to keep positive and trying to improve. She isn't going to come up and talk to me anymore. I reactivated my twitter in hopes she blocks me on that as well. If I don't get a new job soon I'm just gonna transfer. I hate myself so much I ruined such a good thing that I needed, letting my feelings convince my brain that things could be different. You where such a good person and I'm sorry I did this to you.

>>32605128
holy edgelord. tf are you smoking kid
>>32605117
creepy fuck. tf did i just read lol>>32605075
another edgelord faggot
cut urself more emo fag also kys

>>32605266
I have no money to bribe with

I like how I told johnny that I knew he was in on it too, that he lies to my face like everyone else and he's like "but I'm not in on it." and I told him about all the shit that's clearly way more than just a coincidence. Like, if it were one thing, maybe. Two, three, four, or five? Ok, just some crazy coincidences. But literally hundreds of things? You have to be fucking dense as fuck to deny that or clearly lying and I told him that. That no one even bothers to try to believe me and instantly say it's just in my head. Which is not how people would react naturally, not when faced with so many "coincidences". Someone naturally would have to admit that it is indeed strange. They don't have to go straight to conspiracy, but not raising an eyebrow at least? Come the fuck on.

After he denied it, he then straight up just does more of the same shit as everyone else. Asked me about what I would find relaxed, like taking a shower. Something that has been pushed on me through messaging a hundred times. It's like, how the fuck can you do this to someone with a straight face? How do you live with yourself? To continue the lie, the psychological torture like it's fucking nothing.

Claire had the chance to be the queen of the planet but she chose a literal retard instead. She's used goods now, I want nothing to do with her. Despite being an artist she has shit views on art and technology. She seemed like she would have been fun to be around 14 years ago but now she has her head so far up her own vagina she thinks she can be the queen on her own.

>>32605521
Also little anzu is cute but she is a clout chaser. She just wants to use me to get famous. I also have no idea what she really looks like, there's no way in hell she actually looks like her photos.

I need someone real.

I don’t want to talk to you anymore than I have to. You ignored me for days. So I don’t care anymore. You’re just some person now.

>>32605549
What I really want is someone that knows how it feels. but you won't be able to find anyone like that, now will you.

You matter to me as much as the dirt under my fingernail. I'm at least a lifetime ahead of you.

>>32605660
You were born in privilege and given every chance in the world. They gave you everything you have, the fact I watched that video in 2011 is what made you who you are and you say that you hate that song the most. You wouldn't exist without me.

Meanwhile they have taken everything from me and the odds are stacked so fucking heavy that what I've achieved has been deemed impossible. It shouldn't have happened. I shouldn't be alive. While you were given everything, I've had to carry the weight of the world on my shoulders. The entire world owes me everything. You should be happy I've ever even thought about you.

The illuminate says I have a porn addiction but I don't watch any porn at all. I have a huge collection of naked ladies on my computer though. I love the female form. It's absolute artistic perfection. Girls that get tattoos should been hung for destroying the gift that God gave them.

I smoked weed for the first time a week ago. It was crazy. I had open eye visuals and even a moment where I felt something I was hallucinating. Tactile. As I tried to go to sleep, sounds that didn't really exist were playing and it was distorted.

Is that normal? Do people really just do psychedelics like this every day?

When I was 14 I had a skin infection and I to go to the doctor for an examination and the doctor asked if her 12-year-old daughter could stay in the room during my examination and my mother consented and the doctor had her sign a consent form and the doctor's daughter was allowed to stay in the room while I was being examined fully naked.

>>32605680
Whatever they owed you has been paid. You are a brat.

Every bad thing that goes her way is a gift from the heavens

>>32605820
For the first time in my life, I'm thinking the same. This crazy projecting narcissistic bitch thinks she's a fucking witch who can curse me for no good reason. I suppose it was only a matter of time before I ran into one of those types.

Everyone is tired of your bs and lies. Tell me your one good quality.

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AHHHHHHHHHHHH

AGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

AGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH

FUUUUUUUUUUUUCK

fek

anxiety dump

I was banned under a Kansas ip address that ended in 215. Why? Didn’t take a screenshot.

I wanted to fix you on my own accord as a pet project, and this is how you repay me
>You’re just some person now.

>>32605892
Kansas is a joke and that ain’t no joke.

I’m so annoyed I still think about her so much. Even with all she did to me, all the ignoring and stonewalling I still think about her and miss her kinda.

But I also wish the worst on her. The worst part was her realizing she’s actually lesbian. Thanks for dragging me along if you didn’t care, darling. Really awesome to wanna marry me then season later decide that.

Never date an avoidant, folks. It’s a disaster.

>at meijer 20 minutes ago, like 10pm at night just getting some essentials
>a broccoli haired blond zoomer wearing a wifebeater with super vacant eyes walks up to me in the freezer aisle and goes "Uhhhh, excuse me?"
>give him the blankest look, shake my head, and just walk away
Encountered him later walking past him to the checkout and just pretended he didn't exist
Don't talk to women in the middle of the night while they are grocery shopping fucking freak. I won't even acknowledge you as human you are like a homeless person to me. Last week some black guys approached me at night by the meat with a clipboard too and I just pretended they didn't exist. I hate men so much they shouldn't be allowed to leave the house without handlers

>>32605955
how did you realize she’s lesbian?

>>32605992
She said it after we broke up to other mutual acquaintances in a group chat sorta thing.

Trump is living proof that if you have enough money you can get away with literally anything & drooling retards will worship the rich that treat them like peasants. He ran a campaign on traditional "white" christian values while having absolutely none of them himself. He never work hard to get what he has, it was all given to him by his daddy. He is a rapist that also has to pay women to have sex with him despite being a billionaire & famous. You have to be a truly disgusting, fat piece of shit, being those things & STILL have to pay a prostitute. He did so while his THIRD wife was pregnant. Multiple marriages are far from good old fashioned values & cheating is just a shitty person move. He also is a terrible business man seeing as he has ran 8 businesses into the ground. He's an absolute liar that lied under oath, against the Bible. He's a self proclaimed pedophile that has admitted to creeping in on young teenage girls changing rooms & then bragged about it. A good Christian will help those in need while Trump wants to send every immigrant that's working hard, shitty jobs that no one else wants to do back to their home country. He's a retard that claims to have the highest iq of any president despite never taken an iq test & had threatened his school if they ever released his sat scores so people could get a rough estimate of his iq. The other graduates of that school have average iqs & the only reason Trump got to attend is because of his connections & money. He's more than likely in the double digits when it comes to iq. He doesn't understand economics at all & thinks trickle down economics actually works by giving rich people more tax breaks & thinks tariffs will bring back American manufacturing. All he is going to achieve are price hikes on electronics & other high prices consumer goods. For some reason he hates EV cars & has a hard on for burning gas.

He is an objectively shitty person & people that voted for him just ignore all of this or deny it.

>>32606020
Yeah but at least he's not CIA. A real president is better than a fake one. Run the country into the ground for all I fucking care. At least it will be genuine. We can rebuild.

>>32605427
not reading all that gay shit
holy blogpost dude like i get the thread but chill pussy

>>32606020
/pol/tards here will lose their shit if you think Trump is a fucking retard. They will just say "you need to go back" which refers to reddit, but having a reddit superiority complex is just pathetic. They will also say you're mindbroken by politics if you dislike Trump. Having a convicted felon and literal rapist as a president is simply embarrassing to all Americans. /pol/tards will defend this saying all politicians lie under oath or are sexual predators but we all know this isn't true. That shit comes out fast if they are doing it and if you're a politician people would know. Trump was proven in court for all this shit so you know for a fact he will lie and try to cover up crimes. You don't need to pretend or make up conspiracy theories. It's a proven fact for Trump. Saying the other shit "that everyone does it" is just cope.

People need to just fucking admit it already. You voted for Trump because you're a piece of shit like him, a misogynist racist, double digit iq retard that makes up the majority of trumps base and if you're proud to have voted for him you should really just kill yourself because you're an idiot that has contributed nothing to society and the world would better off.

I have to spend the next 4 years watching my president make an ass of himself repeatedly and just feel terrible for being an actual patriot. I love America but holy shit is it filled with the dumbest mother Fuckets on the planet. You put an orange clown in the white house and now we all look stupid because of racist, women hating retards.

>>32606063
kys weirdo why do you love trump so much
also not reading all that.
fucking hate pol faggots
are they paying you to shill his dumb propaganda. fucking hell…
at least schizopost like the other weirdos on here and be funny

nothing

>>32606059
>at least be genuine
He wants billionaires to run the country and has proven he has no qualms about lying to the American people even under oath just so he can try to worm himself out of trouble. MAGA is all about having values and ethics wh8le Trump has none of these things. He's the least genuine person, in the world, you would have to be a fool to believe a single word that comes from his mouth. He only cares about him self and his own self interests. He has used tax payer money on renovations right next to his own real estate to jack up its value.

How you can think such a shit person is genuine I have no idea. The fact he WILL lie to cover shit up that makes him look terrible should clue you in on something.

>>32605914
I don’t live in Kansas and I don’t use a vpn

>>32606066
>I'm not going to read that
>obviously reads it so he can troll by saying the exact opposite of what was posted.
Your not even trying faggot.

>>32603591
I came to the realization that my desires are evil, but I work really hard to be good. It feels like being a mad scientist who thinks he can change the world for the better with his experimental formula, except that I know that I'm wrong and my formula would only make things worse, so I work on traditional science instead.

>>32606090
neither are you little bitch
suck off trump more why don’t you lol
also kys and seethe pussy
also try harder

>>32606090
also you are a RETARD

i said i’m not reading all that gay shit

i read like 2 fucking lines and was like yea fuck that

hate polgaytards

go away

>>32605735
Are u sure it wasn’t salvia? That isn’t supposed to happen.

>>32605735
Visual hallucinations with your eyes open are not normal. Lights can seem brighter. Vision can go fuzzy if u don’t have a tolerance, particularly more from orange sativas. U can definitely get some intense visuals with your eyes closed however. If u are capable of picking up on audio transmissions it can amplify it. That’s how it was for me when I first started. I recommend not making it a habit. Sucks to be dependent on.

Joined a new project at work and it's fucked hahaha. There is so much work, not enough people and the people we have don't have enough experience

At least I'm competent and have experience and am picking it up quick

>>32605735
I’ve smoked weed almost every day for 12 years and I’ve seen black figures in the dark a handful of times but I also saw them before I started smoking weed too. Saw a pink worm that looked like the size of a snake in the garden last year. That’s the only hallucination I can remember and I don’t blame it on drugs. Sometimes it looks like things that are still are waving around. If I stare at a towel for too long it looks like it’s morphing and if I stare at grass sometimes it seems like it has a slow heart beat.

I'm going to break up with my girlfriend in 2 weeks. She's going on vacation to Disney World with her friend and I don't have it in me to break her heart before she goes and bog her down with. Dogsitting for her in the mean time too but I can't stand the fucking thing, him and his goddamn hair everywhere is insufferable.

She hit 40 days sober again today. She chose to celebrate it by going to every ER in a 50 mile radius with some concocted story to get a one off prescription.

She will probably relapse and go on another 2 week near death bender. Then she will wake up and have the "epiphany" again. Meetings, sponsors, mutli-hour introspection sessions with me. Just one new "revelation" about her behavior that keeps me thinking "maybe this time". That thought is just poisoning me.

I’ve also seen the specs of light that float around in the sky since I was a kid. It’s similar to those sparkles that reflect off of snow except they move around freely. It looks like they spawn and move around in a particular direction in a squiggly manner and then just disappear. Millions of them scattered around each other. I have to focus to notice them.

I noticed at the grocery store that hamburger buns were 70 cents per ounce while wagyu ground beef was 60 cents an ounce. Seems kind of strange.

I could make my ex girlfriend cum with one finger within minutes and my current partner of 5 years struggles to cum regardless of what I do and it is killing my sex drive

It’s largely dependent on how she is feeling, if she feels sexy (rare) she will cum easily enough via oral sex. Never via penetration or by me just playing with her clit.

It’s really upsetting, I don’t think I’m a sexual god but I’ve always found a way to make my partner finish consistently.

Shes a very attractive woman but I find myself putting off sex because I don’t want to deal with her being upset that she couldn’t finish. She’s never cum via penetration and despite having had 10 sexual partners has only been able to finish with 3 of them.

I find myself finding other far less attractive women so attractive that I get rock hard just seeing a girl and imagining what the sex with them would be like. I’ve discussed methods to make her cum but she can’t even get there with masturbation alone without feeling a certain way.

I’m increasingly tempted to cheat because my sexual gratification is in the sexual satisfaction of others. I don’t want to, because I love her and have built a strong life with her. However, neither of us have a good relationship with sex right now despite being young and attractive.

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I'm such a sad fucking loser

>>32606063
I voted for him so that bitcoin goes up

dont care about anything else

Just cheat on me already I deserve this

ty for outing yourself as a sensitive lil bitch, I will not be wasting any more time and effort on you. good day. I SAID GOOD DAY, BITCH!

>get over it
trying
>sleep with someone else
not attracted to anyone else currently
>he doesn’t like you and treated you like dirt
yeah fully aware
>he ignored you and only messaged for sexts or nudes and even that was one-sided
yeah i know
>he might be gay and closeted
it’s possible. not mad if he is, kinda sorry for him honestly if that’s the case
>you’re holding on to an eidolon of him in your mind
yeah the months of radio silence and weird inconsistencies caused me to ruminate about all of it to the point of it being a constant tread in my skull
>he's not perfect, he’s not the right guy, any connection you felt was a reflection of your own personality and the hormone dump caused from sex
yeah but I’ve never felt like that before and I don’t know how to get it back. Is it even possible to feel like that again?
>you deserve so much better
I know, I think I’d be a great partner. I wish I could’ve been better with him/for him.
>he didn’t want it anyways. he wouldn’t take care of it
yeah that’s probably right
>he wouldn’t even talk to you
yeah I didn’t message either though. I thought his silence meant things were ended and then he’d message again or say something or touch me as he walked by
>his hesitation shows he doesn’t want you enough or he’s uncomfortable with you
he’s nervous and it confused the hell out of me
>I want to explain at least the things that got misunderstood. I want to show up for him and reassure him
He has to do that for himself. You do too. You have to let go.
>I don’t want to let go.
Let go. Let it go.

I simply don’t manage my life responsibly with alcohol in it. I have a serious problem. I need to leave it behind.

I don’t like how I have to start over again tomorrow to not be a piece of shit anymore.

I fucking hate women so much it's unreal.

I'm building a healthy flossing habit by reframing it as self-harm

It took about 10 years but I finally moved om from a women I had an unhealthy obsession with.

What kind of pride do you think I hold and am I expected to be free of frustration towards the current state of the world, my situation, the way I am treated, and especially myself? Am I not supposed to feel hurt when the intention is to hurt me, not from whoever the fuck this or that stupid streamer/ youtuber person or random dickhead, but the people who can really god damn do it? And now that we are here, how glad does that make everyone?

Why can't I quit this site.
I know that the day I do that my life will be much better but I just. Keep. Coming back.

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Linguists when their wife gets a boyfriend (The relationship is evolving which is a good thing)

God damn, she's fucking HOT!

If I could just commit to doing nothing but sleeping in my free time, that could be cool. Just get up to work or eat and then I wouldn't really have anything to worry about nor would anyone else.

>>32605830
>>32605820
Same, what a bunch of cunts and assholes

>>32606760
hard

I hate those cunts and assholes they're all two faced cunts and assholes, I can hear them gossip and talk shit behind my back, groan or sigh when they see me, guess what you pieces of low life shit I do the same you people make my skin crawl. You're all narcissistic, sociopaths

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>>32607030
hard

I need a break today. I'm hoping you and everyone else doesn't take it personally. I haven't been sleeping well, or eating well, or making good choices. But you probably already know that. I can't start medication until a month from now, and even then it's just the appointment for them to see if I qualify for it. My scores are so fucking high. I was in the teens years ago, but in the 20s now? Not coping. I sent an email recently to my family basically honestly telling them to get bent. They offered me money to come back to them and rebuild what trust had been lost. There is so so much I could tell you that lead to where I am right now, but it's all so messed up. You said you wanted to focus on more positive things. I really am trying, I hope you know that.

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8 track blyat
It's unreal
women hate themselves so much I don't even need to

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Fuck it, I might get a working holiday visa, why not? I don't have much employment history and I never graduated from high school, but what's the worst that can happen, they say no?

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constant unreal
deal me krokodil
I don't hate u
I mate u
dyela Kazakhstan !!

>>32606180
No it was a pre roll from a legit dispensary. I saw details on woodwork that wasn't there, colors would become brighter, I saw geometric shapes glowing and moving when I stared into the dark .. overall it was way more trippy than I had any idea it would be.
>>32606246
I decided to stop using it because I have too much shit to do and an episode of psychosis or hppd would be a disaster. Plus I felt like SHIT about a week later once it all left my system. Weed seems way more addictive than I thought.

My current theory is that mental illness runs in my family and I'm just not the sort of person who should be smoking this shit. Thank god I didn't start with an edible or I'd be in the looney bin.

I wish I could slap you in the face.

Do I want to fuck all these pretty little girls? Absolutely. Would I if I had one solid companion? No, I wouldn't.

Your desire to kill your father is disturbing and quite frankly I cannot engage with you any further as a friend. I wish you peace.

Using formulas was really quick XD
anime + japan + short+rainbow => 100% clown

If you have nothing to say then shut up, I already told you that.

>>32607478
Same

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yeah Standing Vehicles* cannot handle
Le Eating of any kind.

Surely my mom understands that I have to go. I have a destiny to fulfill. There is an entire world out there and I need answers. I can't stay in this town and die alone. I spend as much quality time with her and the rest of my family as I can but the future is calling and I have to answer. The weight of the world is on my shoulders and I need to carry that weight.

As for girls, I know that I am desired. My whole thing is that I'm a hopeless romantic that is loyal to my core. Girls go crazy for that kind of stuff and they all want some of my super love. They know I won't fuck around if I chose them, so they are fighting to the death to be the one chosen. Except her, she thinks that I would pay money to be with her but she's wrong. I would do anything for love but I won't do that. There are a billion girls out there that I get to choose from and they all want to be with me, even if they think "I can fix him." Just because she has been my chosen infatuation for so long doesn't mean I would do anything to be with her. It has to be genuine, if she just wants the fame and money then I don't want her. I can live without her. There are other 11/10s in the world, like BBunn that are more than willing to do it for free.

Again, trying to say "there are no girls" I just don't believe you. I am the reason your daughter dresses like the devil. People want to see me and her get together after all this time but I won't pay for it.

>>32607858
I wouldn't let you, not because it would hurt me, but to not give you the satisfaction that you tried.

>>32607927
I'm was projecting to the people who are messed up to me, not you-you. I doubt you know me

Prison rules should apply to real life. If you talk shit or disrespect anyone you 100% deserve to be punched in the mouth. If you're a child molester, entire society gets to treat you like a little bitch that does everyone's chores or else they get the shit beat out of them. If you owe someone debt that you don't pay back or continue to gamble with new money, you should get raped.

The world would straighten out real quick.

>>32607958
Thanks for the info, buzzkill.

>>32607976
You're welcome

I didn’t feel like shit in Montana because of weed withdrawals. I felt like shit because I was riding there in a blazer with shitty suspension and the elevation change fucked me up. I was also drinking a good amount and I was swarmed by mosquitoes. Had nothing to do with weed. I took a break recently after I had to leave the house and felt completely indifferent about it.

Marijuana doesn’t give withdrawals and I can drive exactly the same as I drive sober after smoking it. Police types of people just want to bullshit people about it because it doesn’t fit their stupid narrative they preached their whole life. Once people are invested into a lie they will do funny tricks to make others be as ignorant as they are.

I didn’t start driving until I had been smoking it for a few years which is also good.

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Tell me about the one that you love, like or have noticed of late

I FUCKING HATE MY LIFE

>>32603591
I dont know when it all went wrong, but forever now I have been a complete mess. Had hardcore narcissistic parents. An asshole of a stepfather always psychologically torturing me and not just anyone, a dude who became the head of the federal police in my country main distric for a while. Think of the head of the FBI in washington. The smartest are the worse at torturing, since that actually are capable people. One of his biological kids is just as messed up as me. Had all kinds of problems. This stepfather ended up with ALS and has been suffering for a while now. No one cares. I hope it is karma. My mother, when I was growing up didnt give a fuck about me. While she was going to parties with powerful and 'elite' people and bragging about it for everyone I was essentially abandoned. It seems that when we went to this main distric I was forgoten because of the lust they had for that bullshit. We would always move cities continuously as I was growing up, so never really had any childhood friendship and I remember I was so jelous of others for it. But in this new city I was left practically by my own, didnt know where to cut my hair, had to find out. Found out the hardway in school what a deodorante was and where to buy it. But it is not enough to be abandoned in a big city, coming from smaller ones. My mother, beign a narcissit, actually punished me for having problems and asking for help. It didnt fit her ideia of what I was suppossed to be. So insted punished me with emotinal shit. How could I have problems growing up as anyone? It didnt fit her new perfect life style. The fucking whore sold my basic wellbeign for bullshit ego lust. That is how I see it, at least. Then, once I grew up she pretends she tried her best and thinks I dont remeber what happened. Because of that, developed a heavy social anxiety that never allowed me to actually have any meaningful relationships. I always got too anxious.

my dad wouldn't have gotten dissed if he didn't mutter shit under his breath all the time. Or make "ugh" noises when I just say a random fact. People thinking I know everything, that I'm always right, and I can explain pretty much everything to people really bothers him for some reason. Probably because he can't do any of it. All his views are based on his own racism and misogyny. Even my mom's "hint" that she feels good that he's finally getting what he deserves is funny because he's always talking down to her. He's getting put in his place by his own son, he should be proud not so butthurt.
>>32608112
You chose this life. You could end it at any time but you don't.

>>32603591
Why me? Why my mother had to be a narcissit who choose a stepfather as well very narcissit. He was for a time, when I was just getting into puberty, the head of the federal police in the main distric of my country. Think of the head of the FBI in washington. My country is top 10 in GDP. Because of that, ended up from small city to many cities to big important city while growing up. Never really had any childhood friends and remember beign so jelous of others for it. In the big city, just got into teenage years and started having the usual problems. Had to find out where to cut my hair alone. Found out the hard way abkut deodorent and where to buy them. Never could bring anyproblem to my parents because they would get angry. How could I have problems? It didnt fit their new status. I felt abandoned, forgotten. My stepfather was competent psychological torturer. He had training in interrogation, he said so himself, and would make sure I felt bad. He liked that, I remember thinking he felt poweful for shaming me. One other of his biological children is even worse than me. At least the asshole got ALS, which I think is Karma. Everyone in his family abandonded him to suffer alone and are after his money. Go figure? I remember my mother just bragging about the party of the elites and how she was beautiful in it and bullshit like that. Forgeting me and my problems for a shit lust for status. If I was any different from her perfect child, she would yell. There was a weird time where I remember she tried to make me confort her, but I had no idea how and even if I wanted. She got pissed at me for that. I now know she had this illusion on her head about what I had to be, and if I was out of it she would yell and throw tantrums. That was hell. Because of that I developed a heavy social anxiety. When I was 13 I remember I first considered suicide. I remember thinking if I should do it, but got to the conclusion that I would spend all my money before so. [cont.]

>>32608199
[cont.] Spend it in pleasures and drugs and whatever, to at least know the pleasures of life before I killed myself. So I had to wait until 18, get some money and do it. Much happened until I was older. Moved cities again, tried many times to have a girlfriend, but the heavy anxiety never allowed me to be confortable with any girl. I was always expecting something bad to happen, so any girlfriend I had went pretty bad. That kind of anxious avoidant thing. Because of that, after case 7 of attempting I practicly gave up on trying. All I wanted was not even sex, but just to feel good with someone for once. Never maneged to, and am terrible afraid it will go south again. Actually it has been for than 6 years already that I gave up. Tried to focus on career. I have always wabted to be an engineer, love everything related. Graduated easily. Got a job in a big company, did well. Managed to do some big things, started a name for myself with all the goods and bads. Bit again hit the emotional wall. Was leaving everything behind just for work. Very stressful, ended up not having energy for taking care of myself and the rest of my life. Somewhere around the way, got addicted to the internet, which would suck the rest of my time. My house was a mess, had no friends, no relantionships. Only stressful job where managment barely allowed me a simple internet course, while the intern beside me was going to the model factory of the company in another city have advanced training courses. I was put in a responsability position with no training and heavy expansion work to be done and actually managed to do so. My reward? Not even a pre-recorded course online. I got out, fuck that place. The emotional burden was getting to heavy. Was thinking about suicide again. Had to do something. So now I am here. Jobless, alone, but with some money. I don't want to admit it, but I guess that I am still on that path the 13 yo me though of. But now I got the money.

>>32608265
I also have this weird paranoia about online stalking that is fucking me up. But I just don't know why. Guess I just gotta get offline.

>>32608075
I love the idea of my ex but we're way too similar to have a good relationship, down to our anxiety, and it makes me sad.

>>32608189
>You chose this life.
Many things will happen in your life that you didn't choose
>You could end it at any time but you don't.
I could, but I won't. Anybody who wants me to die will have to do it themselves.

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Literally me

>>32607974
has it straightened up prisons?

You broke my heart but now I know that it is possible for someone out there to not do that. They don’t run away, they don’t leave me wondering where we stand, and they don’t still think they have to take the world on alone. Maybe you’ll learn to let someone in who wants to be there someday because that’s what you rejected with me. I hope so because I still think you deserve it and it’ll only ever be within me to love you.

>>32608553
I don't care about this world, I'm just tying loose ends. Although I wondered if you could keep up with me, but if E couldn't then you never had a chance.

>>32603591
I am really and real fucking sick and tired of all this shit, i really wish i had balls to off myself but i suspect that mr.bones infernal wildride doesn't end with death, it would be way too easy.

>>32608056
>the namefag is a junkie that is trying to defend his drug of choice
Being high slows you down regardless of what drug you take, you fucking retard. You are impaired, you are slowed, just because you think you can do shit normally doesnt mean you actually do. Someone that is high behind the wheel is just as dangerous as someone who is drunk. Kill yourself before you kill someone else.

Ok, I'm sorry. I will lower my expectations. I will keep expectations low.

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>>32608640
Kek. Good one, anon.

Damn. What a faggot.

You don't know where I stand because I fly.

>>32608640
Driving while or after using marijuana can be a hazard if u are not used to it. Being chink eyed stoned doesn’t help. I personally function normal with it. All it does for me is alleviate stress and anxiety. Driving under the influence of alcohol is certainly more dangerous.

Hipsters irritate the fuck out of me.

Gonna be honest, I would be really disappointed if she was a roast beefy and not a cute innie. Also, if she has herpes that might be a deal breaker. She was a groupie to a fucking DJ, and she 100% had sex hair in that photo with him in the hotel room so the odds of her getting herpes from a european DJ are pretty high.

CAPTHA: g0ys

I ate some shrooms earlier and felt euphoric. I still feel amazing right now and this song sounds better than music has ever sounded to me

>>32608750
This is the only time I've ever seen you post something that isn't an insane rambling. Are you back on your meds?

>>32607035
I was being a cunt too because it's the truth ocassionally

>>32608441
Considering prisons are filled with murderers, thieves, and people that have no qualms with breaking the rules, prison respect goes a long ways to keeping shit in line. People keep up their hygiene because no one likes a smelly nigger, people clean their rooms because no one likes shit to be messy, the TV is ran like a diplomacy, debts are paid in full and quickly, and no one talks shit (and when they do, are quickly put back in place).

You think prisons aree run by the guards? There is like 1 guard for every 50 prisoners and a lot of these people already have 30 years so they don't give a fuck.

>>32608899
Trump wouldn't last a day in prison. First, he's a rapist which puts him on the same level as child molesters. He would get his shit beat as soon as people read his charges (you can't lie about your charges, people WILL find out what you did) Second, he talks shit all the time. He wouldn't be making cute little nicknames like sleepyjoe or crooked hillary in prison. His big boss attitude comes from the fact no one will just punch him in the fucking face and he knows it.

>>32608877
I don’t take meds unless I’m detained. I ate about 20-30 hydroxyzine pills and probably less than 20 lithium tablets during winter and spring of 2023 and I didn’t like the way it made me feel. I don’t take prescription medication.

>>32608929
I may have had more hydroxyzine than that. I finished the first prescription and ate a few from the second one. Maybe 40 pills. I’m not sure. Probably had less than 15 lithium tabs. Maybe even less than ten.

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been talking to this girl for a few weeks (dime piece) with lots of sexting and cutesy messages in the morning, but when it came down to arranging a meet at her at her place she's been leaving my messages on delivered even after I offered to pay for her taxi to get from her uni accommodation to her house (about 75 miles away) shes been nothing but sweet and very nice aside from that. What gives?

she also just started her period and has been getting migraines though

>>32608857
I knew this asian girl that was extremely hot. She had an amazing tummy, defined ribs and hour glass shape. She was very thin but still had curves to her. She also had the cutest pussy I've ever seen. It was an innie and made a round w shape and that was it. No beef, no large clit, just a cute little bump. It was also really, really small and she could barely fit two fingers in it.

I did not get to fuck her because she lived two states away but she gave me a few video shows and they were the hottest things a girl has ever done for me. I would have destroyed her little pussy like you wouldn't believe.

>>32603599
When I have a good day I know I will be paying for it with a run of following bad days.

I had an ex a few years back that moved for a new job and we were long distance. Her old ex just happened to live in that same city and she would post songs like "do I wanna know?" which is about wondering if an ex still had feelings for them. She would also post drawings of herself with the "he loves me, he loves me not." and a bunch of other shit about how some guy was leading her on. I told her I wasn't retarded and knew that she was talking to her ex and was trying to fuck him and she got angry at me. We made up, but a week later she wanted to "go on break" for a few days, using the excuse that the move to a new city was a lot and work was a lot and she just wanted time for herself. I told her "You're not just going on break so you can fuck other guys and not calling it cheating, right? We are still together, you just want time alone." and she said "Yeah, just time alone. We are still together,"

I'm 99.9% sure she fucked her ex or some other guy she was chasing while up there during those few days. In her mind, it wasn't cheating because "we weren't together" even though I made it clear to her that fucking another guy would have been considered cheating.

Then she posted a message on social media about how no one wanted her, none of her friends would visit her, and that she was alone and no one loved her. I was like "What the fuck, do I not count?" and she got angry saying I was making it about me when she was the lonely one. I literally had plane tickets ready to visit her in 2 weeks. So I'm pretty sure her ex or the other guy fucked her and then immediately dumped her so she was complaining about being used to me.

I broke up with her before I could visit because I wasn't putting up with that shit. You don't sit there and say no one loves you to the person that says I love you every day. She was chasing someone else and it wasn't working out the way she wanted it to.

Women don't post nudes online for the thrill of it anymore. It's just passionless, practiced, strategic marketing for a subscriber model to get more passionless nudes. The idea of a girl being legitimately horny when she takes nudes is what makes nudes exciting. But that's gone. Adding money to the equation of any activity turns it from, "I do this for fun," to, "might as well make money out of my fun," to, "I don't care about this but it's making money and it's easy."
I just miss girls going online and getting naked because it got them off. Yes, it was rare, but that was part of the excitement. Now there's a massive oversaturation of freebies that only exist to get you to subscribe for more. More dead eye smiles, more loud fake moaning, more rehearsed weird positions designed to maximize how much body the camera can capture while sacrificing any real pleasure she's getting.
This is just one of the many, many aspects of the internet that was ruined. I will forever resent Steve Jobs for giving normalfaggots 24/7 access in their pockets.

>>32609305
You need to get a real gf rather than living the sad life of an incel.

It's my birthday tomorrow. I'm officially one year away from being a wizard. Woohoo.

>>32609397
Happy early birthday anon. Your robe and wizard hat will be waiting on your doorstep tomorrow.

>>32609403
And it looks like my Reading for Idiots book will arrive too because apparently I didn't understand that you have another year left.

Someones laughing at me, I can feel it.

How about you and me blow this popsicle stand?

I hate myself so much. It's bad today bros

>>32609561
Only if you blow my popsicle on the way out.

>>32609561
I don't know any better places.

You guys keep saying shit like "take a nice relaxing shower." or "pulls his pants down to get a nice blast of stench and musk." or "we need to talk about hygiene" or "oh it's a stink bug in the middle of winter".

I don't even stink, that's the thing. I still wash my dirty bits (all the parts that be stinky) with soap, water and a rag. I know I need a deep scrub to get some dead skin off me but whatever. The reason I don't take care of myself as much as I should is because I just don't care. I have no reason to. You have isolated me from the world, there are no girls here and even if there were you would make sure they wouldn't get with me. You want me alone, that's how you've been running things. So until I get answers I really don't see a reason to take care of myself. When this is over, I'll get a nice haircut, shave the beard, deep scrub my entire body with a exfoliating brush. I'll trim the bush and then razor the balls so everything is silky and smooth. I'll smell like rainbows and sunshine.

but not until you end this shit. Not until you give me a companion. Until then I'll just be a hairy, dirty little boy. It would be fun to play out the scene of The Wolverine where the pretty japanese girls give him a bath. bathing with a bunch of pretty asian girls would be the best way to get me to keep up on my hygiene.

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I never had an actual girlfriend
This was all a lie and I'm done I don't even wanna try getting with anybody at all. I'm gonna regret this so fucking much but I give up I'm not going to try anymore for anything. I'm a loser anyway

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I don't want to admit it but to say my spirit's been damaged is an understatement. I'm defeated. Too much humiliation is not good because then you end up with someone like me. Somebody who's been spiritually and mentally defeated in every sense of the word

>>32609723
Don't hate yourself, internet hug

i feel like i am genuinely going to kill myself the moment an oppertunity to arrises, i just cant fucking do this

I think I'll just work on side projects and wait to die and then rejoin The Nobody.

I think I am lovable even to the people I want to be loved by but I have no way to organically meet them, it is so awkward to interject myself especially since suffering hair loss, and I think it would be weird to change my life around singularly to meet someone. This fate could have been avoided but it seems I'm locked in now. Still, things are going well otherwise.

https://youtu.be/H4xE0u4OQcY

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>>32609944
I hope that u heal, anon.

>>32609984
hope i die instead please, honest to god

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I am an BNHA fan and AM OBSSESED WITH THIS FUCKING WOMAN! I I CANT STOP THINKING ABOUT HER AND WISHING SHE WAS REAL AND COULD DOMINATE ME!

>>32610024
I don't know what the hell is wrong with me, but it is what it is ig...

Lmao you snake, only ever hit me up if you need something from me, you aren’t that slick

My tolerance I have for the friend visitng right now is so low it hasnt even been an hour and i already want them to shut the fuck up

i dont know if i should get korean food or make steak sandwiches... i dont want to do the dishes

You are too selfish to understand my motivations.

it's never good enough

>>32610032
Whoa you're messed up

You tried to deny my ascension but you will recognize my kingdom. Or by God's hand I will start a fire that will burn the entire world.

>>32610106
Why

>>32610122
I remembered that I told even back then that you can have this pile of shit, but since you are so incompetent I don't know how this is supposed to look like.

DEATH TO ALL NARCISSISTS

I need a classy broad
I'm tired of these BOPs

Imagine if there was a world renowned artist known for one thing in particular, painting the most beautiful women in the world. He has spent his entire life honing his craft and accomplishing mastery of the human female form. His goal is to achieve the most perfect feminine features, with striking eyes, blushed cheeks, soft pink lips and a body made of flawless lines and curves. Everyone knows this artists work, his pursuit in finding female perfection is called outstanding. Every new piece he creates gets closer and closer to the ideal woman. This artist knows female beauty more than anyone that has ever lived. He lives for venus.

Now imagine that this artist was absolutely infatuated with one girl in particular. He has rendered her beauty dozens of times, her sleek emerald eyes, her striking eyebrows, and immaculate cheek bones. Her absolutely perfect breasts and toned figure. Her hourglass shape is sublime. He knows that she is perfect in every way and wants to capture her essence onto canvas but her beauty is so divine that no painting does her justice.

Knowing this artist is obsessed with her and has painted her many times in his artistic career, she would have to feel like the most magnificent beauty to ever live. Her ego would know no bounds. The most perfect female human specimen to ever exist, for now and forever. For all of perpetuity. That is what she is and she knows it. It's unquestionable to anyone that has seen her, a work of art sculpted by God himself and he has sent this artist to archive her preeminence.

>>32610165
It was never yours to give and you are not relevant in this world. You have no say here and no one cares that you exist.

I should kill myself. First time I'm admitting this and I'm glad I am.

i love every and single one of you, regardless of what you have done

I realized after I left my ex for cheating on me that she didn't become a good person and just became more of a bully bitch

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>>32610299
I even got dubs to confirm it.

Godspeed, Ashlyn! You are the girl I loved the most in this whole wide world! I will never forget all you did for me and none one will ever make me feel as loved as you. May you and our kitty Ozzy rest in peace together. </3

Someone is laughing at me some where and if they think they can get away with it they are sadly mistaken.

i just really feel like i dont care about what life has to offer, even the greatest experiences ie eer had dont make up for the bad ones

>>32610297
You must have not listened when I said that you dirt under my fingernail, You only exist because i don't wash my hands enough.

oh I also hate my parents for the shit they try to put me through

So whats your motivations?

>>32610368
I told you that I tie loose ends, you just don't understand what that means, because you only care about yourself and don't even notice others.

>>32610370
So could you please explain:) ?

I may be mega retarded and ruined my life with the only girl who ever gave a shit about me, but at least I actually listened to her unlike you
you PROPOSED to her after a YEAR and not only did she turn you down, you tried again??? DID YOU NOT TALK ABOUT WHY SHE SAID NO?

>>32610372
Since I leave this shithole and nobody else is competent, I do various things like scolding you for being a retard. Those who you will have to talk with are even more annoying than me.

>>32610368
Wife

Most people act like animals, perhaps I should take advantage of that.

>>32610445
I want to fuck her like an animal. I want to spank her, choke her, I want to absolutely destroy her. I want her to say stop and I just won't.

Who will I have to talk to?

And if you wrote that, I'm really glad that you're gay.

Call me gay one more time and you will deal with this shit alone. Anyway it's way past my bedtime.

>>32609064
you did the right thing

Deal with what?

I'm dealing with u:)

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I have a serious mental illness and few social skills. I do not know how to talk to people or engage in conversation. My mental illness is mostly under control but I lost some years of my life as a result.

What do I do? For example, how do I talk to people in classes (I am in Uni but a bit older because of the aforementioned mental illness). It feels very artificial and fake to me when I attempt it. I am almost literally unable to small talk because I live in burgerland but am a yuropoor, and I haven't talked to many people in a few years + covid.

Lol dude what's your favourite movies and TV shows?!! Lol man I loved Oppenheimer XDDD
I also love MARVEL RIVALS. I love spideyman too that's sick dude!!!!

Anything else goes nowhere - just hello, goodbye, etc.

I had hobbies in the past but don't engage much with them anymore. Most of my hobbies involve doing things and there isn't much to talk about.
I feel that conversation mostly involves repeating the same things from earlier conversations. I don't enjoy conversation. It feels like my perspective is very different - a bit like soldier who came back shell-shocked and traumatized from wars and is no longer able to relate to "normal" people.

A smart, attractive young female who is a rising star at school / work will never fall in love with me and think of me erotically, and I really can't think of any reason not to kill myself over this.

Even if they owe you everything they won't give you anything
At that point it's less about fairness (which you already said multiple times it doesn't exists as if you actually believed it) and more a case of trust, I wouldn't trust them to care about you or keep their promises and neither should you.

Now the priority is survival, what can (You) do to make the situation better
You shouldn't try to get anyone to take care of you (even if they should) but you should also not care about their livelihoods when building yourself (since they wouldn't care about yours)
Don't be spiteful for spiteful sake, benefit from it (and not just emotional benefit)

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I feel like life closed its doors off to me a long time ago and it's only recently I'm noticing the signals.

>>32610683
It's not just you
your serfdom will be a legal reality soon enough (I mean it's a reality but it's not put on paper yet)

>>32610686
This isn't really a H1B rant, but I'm not going to say that isn't adding to the pile.

i love my boyfriend and would never ever cheat but sometimes i fantasize about a handsome, intelligent man coming into the bookstore i work at and hooking up with him if he has similar literary tastes.

>>32610592
what about the non-romantic reasons?

>>32610708
That's fucked up. Your poor bf deserves better

World sucks but I want to live forever
Most of the bad shit in the world is associated with death anyway
For me the best thing would be to be immortal suck in a silent room with high speed internet surfing that internet and binging media for all eternity

I've spend most of my life people pleasing and standing idly by as everyone else moved on. I guess being told by my father that I was "ruining his life" by just being a 5 year old kinda stuck with me a lot longer than I thought it would.

>>32610756
Your dad sucks and doesn't sound like a good dad.

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>>32603837
yes brov

>have some friend over for pizza and anime
>friends have never watched the show before but think its open mic night at the mystery science theater 3000 club
>after 3 episodes my wife is so silently pissed off she quietly leaves the room and continues watching it on her computer alone
>my friend didn't even notice she left
>later that night after they leave she tells me anime is something you do alone then talk to others on /a/ about and to not count her in for the next pizza and anime party

I know shes autistic and anti social but is she right?

>>32610847
No, maybe she rather watch it alone with you. She could feel embarrassed if you're both older.

sometimes i wonder if i would've been a lot better off if i was just more selfish back then. everything i did was so my family could succeed, and yet they end up like crabs in fucking buckets while i'm just getting older and with no skills because i spent all this time being the fall guy to help others

>>32610756
fucking same man. i was always told to not be a bother, to just sit down and shut up. i could be bringing in two arm fulls of groceries and try to bang at the door for my own family to let me in, only for my own fucking brother to yell at me for banging on the door, then trying to push me off the fucking balcony.

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clown XD, seek help

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I wish I never existed.

>>32610960
I feel like this but through my own fault, I don't mind helping my family out. They're the ones who have back.

>>32610857
everyone there is in their 30s. we normally watch anime together, but she watches twice as much anime alone. The anime was Dandadan which shes already seen so I didn't think she would be upset at them talking. One of the friends is still here and she told me shes watching Medalist alone tomorrow becasue if she has to hear another joke about it she'll poison my friend and didn't say it in the joking way.

*makes pegeon noises while moving head like bird*

I'll always be one step a head of you, you fool.