How does one gain and develop self confidence/self esteem? As I work on my social skills and get exposure (which hasn't been working that well) this is a glaring issue and its affecting my ability to be social and connect with others. I don't have any close friends and have never asked a girl out (been asked out by girls, didn't work out because I'm retarded). In fact, I've drifted away from all my friends except for work friends (not real friends according to some on here, we don't hang out or text/talk outside of work). I think my issues stem from a combination of factors from my upbringing to lack of socialization (especially early on, and peer rejection) and insecurity about it. I possibly have social anxiety as well. I am 27 years old, just feel life slipping by as I sit in my bedroom on the computer. I find myself paralyzed by inaction at times when I try to be plan things such as going on a trip or getting involved in more activities such as going to church, going /out/, learning more about /o/ and seeking out people with these interests. In fact I don't even know where to start. I have a good job and work out regularly (although I do struggle with self discipline and lethargy in the mornings too and miss gym days). Any advice for me? I know there have been similar threads before, but I feel my situations a little different than others because I'm not a NEET and did have prior experience but still found myself isolated like this (possibly depression? Autism? I don't know). I still have close family, they're all I really have.
>>32608282> How does one gain and develop self confidence/self esteem?I'm not sure I also struggle with that. Recently I made a character sheet of myself and that helped. Knowing what you are good at and where you lack. Then you focus on the good parts and put some effort in believing them.> I find myself paralyzed by inaction at times when I try to be plan thingsYou kinda just have to choose something and commit to it no matter what
>>32608282I have the same set of issues, and the only way out seems to me, more and more with each passing day, to hang out with other people as much as possible and be assertive. Even if you have to force it or be somewhat or an asshole, it doesn't matter. Turns out sociopatic, narcissistic, manipulative and opportunistic assholes can get away with a lot of things as long as they have confidence and charm. In fact, they get by in life more than you and me.You just have to gaslight yourself into being that kind of person. I know, I can't wrap my head around being that either. But observing others, it seems to be the answer.Also, be funny. That's extremely useful.
