Unlike most people on this board, I don't want a romantic relationship and neither I have had sex, had any real romantic kiss or any relationship. I don't consider it worth it and it distracts me from my other hobbies. On the contrary, I have a paranoia that anyone might fall in love with me. Of course, nothing really happens if I simply say no, and yet I still somewhat fear talking with women for this reason. Hell, once I sent a very dear female friend of mine a sort of "anti-love declaration" because of such a fear. What worsens this is that I'm not ugly, very literate and I try to take care of myself going to the gym, meditating and doing habits women usually find attractive.No one has really confessed love to me explicitly. There have been some times (surprisingly mostly men) who kinda confessed love to me, but my autistic brain did not register it as such and only did I realize until years later. And yet I still over analyze women's gesture's and words in an excessive detail to figure out whether or not they have a crush on me.Is this normal or is it virgin Stockholm syndrome? And how can I stop my mind from acting on this irrational fear?
>>32625249>virgin Stockholm syndromethat one, youre terrified of the change and openness a relationship would require
I‘m very similar to you OP. My biggest fear is that the drama that comes with dating distracts me from being the beat version of myself. I‘m not sure if there is anything that can be done about it because I don‘t actually want to do anything about it since I think this is the only sane way to live your life. Otherwise I would not do it.
>>32625249You don’t trust love/affection. Probably because you learned that behind every gesture there is a dagger not too far behind, poised to stab the shit out of your spirit. Figure out where you learned that. Then use logic and the emotional clarity that comes from remembering to conclude that not every woman will harm you.
>>32625249>Is this normalNo. It's breathtakingly narcissistic.
>>32625249Trust me - ain't nobody gonna fall in love with you
>>32625249Eh, my relationship/love paranoia is even worse after spending my 20s fucking dozens of women. I'm much happier spending my free time simply improving my mind and body without distractions.
>>32625249> Hell, once I sent a very dear female friend of mine a sort of "anti-love declaration" because of such a fear.Strange behavior
>>32625382not OP, but thanks for the advice ^^ I try to keep this mentality but my brain keeps telling me it's always the same, it takes time to really integrate that in yourself
>>32625249I find it funny that you assemble this asexual character above earthly desires on the first paragraphs only to end up sounding like every other autist that posts here in the last linewhy do you want to conform to what "normal" is anyways, be glad you are the way you are and just leave it at thatonly chuds think "normalcy" is a narrow spectrum, your life seems pretty normal to meI don't think you need to change because the way you're carrying your life right now might leave no space to make anyone else happy being next to you so you save people and yourself some awkward if not painful situations
