*shits everywhere*:DDDDDDD
I think i have bird flu
>>4830616how often do conjures get bird flu?
>>4830622Idk i think i got it from honk honk faggot shitleaf geese
>>4830614You will wear the gay little diaper and you will NOT shit everywhere.
>>4830632>cockattielof course this stupid chicken would need a diaper meanwhile the conjure is not only smart and outgoing but will also take pride in shitting half of their weight with extra reverb in front of others and take satisfaction in doing so
>>4830631Do I have to use a disinefctable robot arm to grab them by the neck and throw them away now
>>4830614omg, a birb!
>>4830632Why are the ads for these so fucking weird
>>4830646poopy birbhe must poop
>>4830651>flyper
>Shits on your shoe>gives you this lookHow do you respond without sounding mad?
>>4830614What bird is that?
>>4830665Green Conjure I think
>>4830632that shit's gonna fill up in like 45 minutes tops
Has anyone ever made a time lapse of these motherfuckers shitting all over the place?
>>4830665>>4830638>>4830622it's conure not conjure
>>4830947I'll conure my dick up your ass
>>4830614Clean it up janny
>>4831035
>>4830664Stuff him with pumpkin seeds and make him a shaking, angsty wreck
>>4831035kek
>>4831084bro wtf I thought birds shat out solid and orderly chunks not wet paint
>>4830614>>4831084>want a bird so bad because having a huge fat fuckin bird to wrap my arms around sounds like heaven>it will literally, LITERALLY shit everywhere and is impossible to housetrainshidsuggs
>>4831400Birds, fish, lizards, and other inferior forms of life have a combined urogenital orifice called a cloaca. Their urine, feces, and sometimes reproductive fluids are all combined as one single mixture and excreted through one single hole that looks like a fat old dude's lips.
>>4831404Just get chickenshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GlULxDx4C2othe answers for "which bird will make me happy" is always chicken (hugs), quail (funny guys), starling (talking porch ornament), or pigeon (smaller chicken)
>>4830664ive a better question, why the fuck am i wearing shoes indoors.
>>4831407It's all fun and sweet until it shits in your laphttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Rez-u39PKIg
>>4831404I feel your pain brother>>4831405… I had no idea about this. I knew about the cloaca but I didn’t know all that other shit got mixed in. What the fuck
>>4831415Because there is bird shit all over.
>>4831405Utilitarianism
>>4831405Many mammals have a cloaca
>>4831504That doesnt bother me in the slightest.
>>4831584Most hygenic birdfag
>>4831407pidge or chicke it is then, quails and starlings are super cute though and I wish it was legal to import a lil' kiwi feller>>4831443>chicken purrs and coos while the owner pets the absolute fuck out of him>just plops a fat wet turdy on her lap while it's doing it>both of them stopbruh moment
Whats a good bird that might go invasive? I want to laugh at the feds for telling me I cant own a native bird. I want to literally shit on their glow in the dark faces.Like the new starling. Both a cool bird, and horrendously invasive. Preferably one that will reduce the seagull population.
>>4831593Consider following:>if you wear shoes, you step in shit and smear it all over the floor without realizing>if you dont wear shoes and you step in shit, you would do the one legged jump of shame towards bathroom to wash your fucking foot, thus avoiding smearing shit all over the place
>>4831728Imported seagull.
>>4830651Because people who keep birds as pets are fucking weird.
>>4831774Counterpoint:>It doesn't matter if you wear shoes or don't, everything in the house is covered in bird shit no matter what, because you own birds and they shit everywhere
>>4831829Last time I checked, most common pet birds shit down from the perch, not send a spraypaint stream of fecal matter everywhere.
>>4831593yeah look at all the youtube videos its all girls kissing and cuddling with them in their bedrooms and bathrooms shits disgusting
>>4831825Don’t say that please I wanna get one someday…>>4831904>and bathrooms???
>>4831914youve not take a shower with parrot on your shoulder?
>>4831443>that squirt in the end
>>4831709I will always shill quails. Chickens are great, but quails are quieter, grow quicker, easier to incubate and breed, and much easier to process.
>>4832013Quails are cool but I like picking up chickens more for some reasonOtherwise I want a starling/myna bird in a heated outdoor enclosure
>>4832013kill yourself right now
>>4831405i mean yeah but like how come the conure plops down solid chunks every 15 minutes and this guy hoses down
>>4831916Now I wanna know how common that is>>4832103Could be a difference in diet? Who knows
>>4831443>that ending holy fuckchiken relaxed too much
>>4831916 >shower>implying they dont bathe as well
>>4831029
>>4831404Don't forget the 6 gazillion fleas too
>>4830614
