east asian helium crisis edition>Educational sites:https://www.investopedia.comhttps://www.khanacademy.org/economics-finance-domain>Financial TV Streams:https://www.newslive.com/american/cnbc.htmlhttps://www.livestreamy.net/bloomberg/>Charts:https://www.tradingview.comhttps://www.finscreener.comhttps://www.portfoliovisualizer.com>Screeners: so you feel like in the movieshttps://finviz.com/https://etfdb.com/>Gambling:https://www.optionsplaybook.com/options-introduction/https://www.optionsprofitcalculator.comhttps://optionstrat.com/https://www.optionistics.com/quotes/option-prices>Pre-Market and Live data:https://www.investing.com/indices/indices-futureshttps://finance.yahoo.com/>Calendarshttps://www.marketwatch.com/economy-politics/calendarhttps://www.earningswhispers.com/calendarhttps://www.cmegroup.com/trading/interest-rates/countdown-to-fomc.htmlhttps://www.mortgagenewsdaily.com/data/building-permits>Boomer Investing 101: so zoomers with meme stocks can outperform youhttps://www.bogleheads.org/wiki/Getting_startedhttps://www.sec.gov/search-filings>Misc smg:https://www.financialjuice.com/homehttps://finance.yahoo.com/trending-tickershttps://market24hclock.com/https://www.dividendchannel.com/drip-returns-calculatorhttps://brokerchooser.com/https://www.chathamfinancial.com/technology/us-market-rates>NEW THREAD: Copy-paste the following when making a new thread:https://pastebin.com/GfB48W5GPrevious smigger thread>>62047679
war in iran day 29 recap (yesterday)>thailand negotiates passage through strait of hormuz with iran>israel reports 9 idf soldiers moderately to severely wounded in clashes with hezbollah>houthis officially enter war on iran’s side>kuwait international airport hit by drones, radar system damaged>over two dozen us soldiers wounded in iranian attacks this week>15 hit at prince sultan air base, 5 seriously wounded>earlier attack wounded 14 more>iranian strikes damage refuelers and an awacs aircraft in saudi arabia>israel starts rationing high-end missile interceptors due to constant iranian barrages>israel airstrikes kill two lebanese journalists, reportedly targeted not collateral>us and israel continue strikes on tehran and western iran>iran keeps attacking israel and gulf countries>iranian missile hits emirates global aluminum facility in abu dhabi>pro-iran iraqi militias launch large rocket and drone attack on us base in baghdad airport>russia reportedly took satellite images of saudi air base before iranian strikes>iranian missiles hit bahrain aluminum smelter, injure workers>iran threatens to strike american universities in the middle east>drone strikes near former us bases in northeast syria>us and israel strike iraqi militants in iraq>pentagon preparing plans for weeks of ground ops in iran if escalation continues
>>62048500dear god... mamamia
>>62048519kekwhat happened to muh cheap eggs?
>>62048505You should organize this on a timeline and include every time that trump has declared victory
Any interesting twitter accounts? It's so hard to find small accounts of people just investing and sharing their ideas. Either filth just trying to rope people into their paid groups, academics with 0 skin in the game opining, 1-min chart daytraders, people focusing on one sector exclusively no matter what, or just outright retarded third worlders.
> futures
balloonbros...
Trump just renamed Iran, what should it's new name be
>>62048527someone already did that
STARTED AS A DRUG DEALER
>>62048534>you can talk sexthis ending is fucking brutal lmao
>>62048527i agreethe true history of this war will only be able to be expressed through greentextcould you imagine what government sourced history or the wikipedia will say about the first month of this war to prevent embarrassment
>>62048533The United American states of Iran
>>62048500thats a man
>>62048540and real too lmaohttps://x.com/atrupar/status/2037660587027476562
>>62048541I think the ideal historical account of this war would be possible in Mandarin puppet show.
>>62048500
my neighbors cutting the grass kek. grass has grown maybe 1cm so far this year.
>>62048544Aaahh!! why is apu being beaten!!!!
FROM ILLEGAL TO LEGITIMATE
I recall them stating this war won't last for more than...6 weeks? Because of legal reasons it can't go on longer because it would be illegal as it's an operation and not a war. you'd think this would be priced in already but the markets keep reacting as if this is a war
>>62048533Israep
>>62048554do you live near my neighbor paul? because i hear paul's mower going right now. if paul is your mowing neighbor come over and we'll watch futures open up over dinner
>>62048560You're thinking 60 days, anon, and that's if Trump suddenly starts caring about laws.
>>62048560"operation". how about we just call it something else then? problem solved
Really have to give the world props, everyone is staying so calm as the natural resources modern civilization is built on run out, no one would have seen this being the outcome
>>62048560the same laws that prevented the tariffs?Trump is a dictator, he doesn't care about laws
>>62048560It's illegal for trump to put his signature on newly minted currency but he's doing it anyways, laws don't matter if there's no one to enforce them
>>62048566renewable energies are already a thing
>>62048563they would have declared war otherwise they have to seek approval from congress to do so but operations are not illegal and cannot last more than 6 weeks after which time war could be declared. it's a fairly important distinction that isn't brought up much
>>62048500How big does my portfolio need to be to satisfy a girl like this?
>>62048566People have been warning about oil shortages, end of US hegemony, and escalating conflicts in the middle for decades. I mean out of all the things that could've gone wrong, this is like the least unlikely.
>>62048560Congress will have to extend it, the US cannot allow Iran to control the Strait of Hormuz, not only will it impact worldwide trade with the toll alone but it mark the start of the end of the petrodollar and the USD's role as the world's reserve currency, also Republicans constantly get bills past the house it's only the senate where they don't have control but AIPAC has bought many Senators
>>62048574anon, it's literally within a 60-90 day periodit's not 6 weeks
threadly reminder that dennys going private and delisting was the top
>>62048560demonrats love this war too so they scrapped the vote that would stop the clown show to mid april, which by then I'd be surprised if we weren't in a confirmed global recessionthe funny part is they'll find a way to cuck even more by then too>your daily reminder that you can never hate israel enough
>>62048500>>62048500Alright /biz/raelis.Do I start going to the church across the street looking for a latin wife? or do I go to the jewish temple across town looking for a strategic milk reserve wife?Also, all-in on Oil and RTX. I FUCKING LOVE WAR!
>>62048505As Rajesh (R.I.P) would say "USIsraelniggers getting their shit pushed in!"
>>62048578such hubrisi love it
>>62048566Most people aren't aware of the harsh ahead and a lot of people like the equities market are coping it will all end soon and the flow of oil will resume like nothing ever happened
>>62048505Can you keep it business/economics related
JUST IN: Strait of Hormuz ship traffic over the past 24 hours.
>>62048580when they quote 4-6 weeks I believe that's because it legally cannot last longer or it would be a war which would also explain Iran's strategy they falsely believe they won't be attacked longer I'm sure trump will continue attacking them for as long as he wants
>>62048590the biggest driver behind market moves is this war and wether or not it is escalating or not
>>62048592Letting a single ship go through is a policy failure by the arabs
>>62048595Sure but the points about 9 dead jews in the hezbollah front has nothing to do with financial markets
>>62048572Did you know once an alternative is found for something it doesn't actually reduce the demand for what it's replacing, maybe it stops the growth in demand, but not the demand itself
>>62048594It's not 6 weeks how many times do you have to be told? The President will need approval from congress after 90 days, There's 60 days of combat and there's an extra 30 days for a "withdrawal" period under the War Powers Resolution of 1973
>>620486019 wounded jews is like ten million goyim being snuffed out, don't question jew math
>>62048601it's all related to the escalationhelps anons get a clearer picture
>>62048566what can the rest of the world even do? say something and you risk israels/americas wrath. they might sanction you back into the dark ages.
>>62048595That doesn't affect gamblers though. They just want ideas on what to gamble on next.
>>62048602Since I started riding a bicycle I no longer need petrol.
Four more hours till futures open?Hope he's cooking up a based truth tweet for us, we're gonna need it
>>62048606ok mom whatever you say
>>62048530that webm has made me laugh harder than anything i've seen all day lmfao. Smart dog, getting his anal stimulation from an escalator in such an efficient manner kek.>>62048572they're a fucking green-tech scam you mongloid retard.The only true renewables are nuclear power/nuclear fission, hydro electric dams, and to a much lesser extent, solar panels on buildings and home rooftops.
>>62048610there are plenty of normal investors here
>>62048566>tfw you spend 12h doomscrolling financial news then go outside and everyone is looking at tiktok videos or yapping about relationships
>>62048608Not really dude, it's just a copy of the timeline from /pol/ isn't it?
>>62048621no, it's from twitter
>>62048613No but bicycle riding results in new demand, you need waterproofs which are made from oil, anti depressants which are transported using oil and hrt which is also heavily oil dependent.
>>62048500classic case of looking good in clothing but probaly sad body
>>62048592I kinda want to chill in Khasab with binoculars and watch it all unfold.
>>62048613yea, but to get your new bike to the store or your front door doeswhich infinitely consumes more of the commodity than your insignificant existence or choices that's how they pull the wool over your eyes and keep the system going, by giving you the illusion that you matter and keep you good complacent goysAnd then you harass the rest of us with that huge ego on the roads in your clown costume
>>62048619Yes. Normal investors need news.
>>62048618Half of UK energy is wind or solar.
>>62048609regression is my guess
>>62048624second
>>62048620brainwashing is lit
>>62048623You posted this while stuck in traffic didn't you?
>>62048623you can get a belt driven bicycle no oil needed belt is also waterproof and unless you're meticulously maintaining your chain everyday a belt will perform better over the long run
>>62048629yes, that explains the blackouts and huge energy prices. Solar panels in a rainy country like the UKSSR is also just plain retarded. The grid needs steady power flows, not stop-start power supply. Wind is also a bad meme and terrible for the environment, and makes the areas it's in unlivable. Surprised i need to point this out really.Hence why i call them "green-tech scams", because if your government fell for them, they got scammed. Nuclear power was always the superior option for the UKSSR.
Im all in on green open tomorrow. Stop loss at -6% wish me luck bros. 2 dark red days thurs and fri i was hoping well get a nice green bounce that i can sell before further damage in the upcoming month(s)
>>62048624looks pretty good to me
>>62048639I've never seen a belt-driven bike that wasn't completely overpriced
>>62048639as someone who made the mistake of riding on a belt-bicycle once, who grew up on chain-link bikes. You're fucking retarded and should lurk forever.
>>62048628I'm a normal investor. Gambling with stocks is all time retard tier. Just go play roulette the odds are better.
>>62048644me on the right
>>62048642>They've been bombing the shit out of each other all weekend>Boots on the way>"I'm all in on green tomorrow"
>>62048646belts are fucking awesome. dead silent zero maintenance. you're a scared bike shop employee simple as>>62048645belts last longer so the upfront cost is more than made up for which is negligible unless you're the poorest fag in existence
>>62048636No. I'm actually replacing the broken front shifter on my bike tbdesu. I'm going to need it. Just avin a larf.
whether we open green or red I'm dumping all my VOO and moving into cashthis shit is far from over and even if trump and netanyahu both get shot in the head today there's a far bigger negative growth backdrop already in play30% cash and waiting for things to straighten out by Q4 if that
Long oil producers if you want to make money
>>62048644I unironically think she's trans. The wide shoulders, the tall torso, the choker, the cuts
Long CANE if you want to make money
>>62048644That's a man.
>>62048651Not saying I think its over, just hoping for a bounce on open.
>>62048660Yeah, there's definitely something really strange going on here
>>62048642every time i post on monday i will make sure there is an F in the post to remember you by
>>62048652That's Jew logic.>>62048653If it's one of those twist-shifts it's trash. Get a thumb-shift.
>>62048661Sugar cane producers that won't be affected by energy and fertiliser price increases?
Weekend oil proving useless as ever.
>>62048592They are clearly having them go near land so someone can visually identify the ship and determine if its allowed to go through or not. Now if the coast around there was held by marines - Iran's control of the straight is over. They can no longer track the marine traffic in real time. This is Trump's play, get the coastline, have the marines arrest any asshole with binoculars immediately and Bob's your uncle - you now control the Strait.
>>62048668
>>62048548And no one asked him about sex with children and whether mossad has a tape of it
>>62048644if you’re into boys, sure
>>62048675Why would they when there's a war on?Hey, wait a minute....
>>62048657Oil has been a disastrous failure for everyone who predicts a long conflict.It feels like it's on the way down for some benign reason.
>>62048548>mr president what do you think about tiger woods recent crash>”I don’t want to talk about it”
>>62048660"she" might be here with us now: https://www.tiktok.com/@r9kscroller
>>62048674Those are good. I have Acera on my tourer.
>>62048673I somehow doubt your manies would survive
>>62048554panic setting in, nice
>>62048681The tiktok website sucks but if she's on /r9k/ then yeah it's confirmed lol.
>>62048668belts are also lighter. no grease to get on your clothes, can leave it in the rain no rust and performance doesn't degrade. no links to break. they're strictly superior for single speeds to say the least. there's some pretty sick internal hubs too so belts comin for dat ass
>>62048679Did someone really ask this?
I like how no one is talking about what's happening in private credit, UBS just halted fund withdrawals for three years from its eurovest real estate fund due to lack of liquidity, Gulf nations are pulling their money out of the markets causing a huge drop in liquidity
>>62048688Exactly. Belts are used exclusively on overpriced hipster fixies or to shill overpriced enviolo hubs. Why does a bicycle need an automatic transmission?
>>62048692amusing that everyone thinks liquidity will just fall out of the sky if the war is ended
Futures will be green
>>62048692Its a nothing burger. Gating investors prevents flash crashes. Private credit is still profitable for now but its on the edge of having negative returns.
>>62048692I was mostly invested in Asian wealth management before this happened. Standard Chartered, HSBC, it was a booming sector. Now plunged off a cliff.
>>62048695Without their oil and natural gas revenue they need money instantly to fund things which is causing a liquidity crisis in private credit, then they will need even more money to repair the extensive damage done to their infrastructure
>>62048696just like his diaper stinky
>>62048696Oil futures? Sure.
>>62048683This is a mountain bike I used to use for riding into mountains. Started fixing it up a few days ago as I feel I might need it. Rebuilt and re-oiled the rokshox, new bottom bracket, new derailleur sprockets, new chain, new brake pads and changed fluid. Just this shifter to go on then some new, skinnier tyres for road use. Should be good until the nukes fly.
What could realistically be done to pump the market at this point?
>>62048694belts are the top option for a zero maintenance bike. have fun selling your repair services lbs employee
>>62048696He is the epitome of America. Fat, slicked back hair, shitty tan, all he needs are aviators. Hollywood couldn't have done a better job.
>>62048706electrification
>>62048652>dead silent zero maintenanceyou're a fucking lying retard. The SQUEAKs and creaking of them are awful, the lack of instant thrust-to-power drive, the fact that you stretch it out quickly etc. What a retarded hill to die on, chain link is objectively superior by default, there is no debate to be had. You're a retard munching on a mcdonalds cheeseburger that got too old so they threw it in the garbage, trying to tell me my $40 custom gourmet burger from an independent joint is inferior. I know bike-addicts who use velodromes with even more experience than me, who wouldn't even think about using a fucking belt, in fact you're literally the first person i've ever seen mention belt-bikes in a positive manner in my entire life, im 39.
>>62048707>zero maintenanceYou some sort of poofter?
>>62048706More good headlines from insiders on a Sunday afternoon
>>62048711>using food to explain somethingFat.
>>62048715I'll believe it when they start to consider it. Consdiering it doesn't really convince me.
predictions for tomorrow?
>Pakistan Foreign Minister confirms Iran-US talks may take place in Islamabad in the coming days.>Pakistan Foreign Minister: Pakistan is very happy that both Iran and the US have expressed their confidence in Pakistan to facilitate talks.>Pakistan Foreign Minister: China supports Pakistan's initiative to host Iran-US talks.Yeah I'm thinking this shit is over by mid April. Get ready for the biggest V shaped recovery since last year lol.
>>62048500>saved as "ideal sexbot.jpg"
For me, it's Glencore
>>62048715
>>62048706Trump and Bibi lover's suicide on live television.
>>62048725What's the resolution? Iran won't give up its ballistic missiles, will Iran give up the ability to make nuclear weapons? They haven't so far, Iran just has to endure
>>62048729Miners during an oil crisis? LOL, the price of diesel is killing mining profits
>>62048706>BREAKING: Donald J. Trump had a fatal heartattack in Mar-a-Lago
>>62048738>AIPAC controlled congress takes over the decision making No better
>>62048725total american humiliation, having the mediator be the country that housed bin laden and still to this day harbors terrorists and the only news coverage it's citizenry gets is the mass rape they commit on lil girls in Great Britain
I hope everyone went to church on Palm Sunday
>>62048748Vance would become President
>>62048725Fake news is better than no news
>>62048755No, Peter Thiel would
>>62048757this is more respectable than when they were caught piling the coffins on top of each other in the shipping vans, no wonder they stick to ai gens so much
>>62048753I worship and pray to my god every day in peaceful solitude.
>>62048725>Get ready for the biggest V shaped recovery since last year lol.I dunno man, that shit will still have some lasting impact for a while.I did load up a bit more on Friday though, and I can still do it two or three more times, so I would very much like that to be true.
>>62048725NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO O WHAT THE FUCK FUCK YOU FAT ORANGE FUCK NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO KEEP BOMBING WHY THE FUCK ARE YOU TALKING YOU SAID YOU WERE GOING TO DESTROY THEM YOU SAID YOU WON FAT FUCKER I SOLD EVERYTHING AND WENT ALL IN ON OIL FUCKING FAT NIGGER
>>62048748it would bump the futures green for two days tho
is this bearish or bullish?
>>62048763I hate this nigger so much, I had to sell everything. Finally found something that works and he TACOs. Worst part is as soon as we go back to Tech or gold or whatever we were doing before he will start some new bullshit and crash everything again.
>>62048618> getting his anal stimulation from an escalator in such an efficient manner kek.U What mate
>>62048725>Pakistan>Peace talksNothing will happen. There is no one to make "peace" with. If there was an agreement, some branch of the IRGC will say it's not a halal agreement or some shit and keep trying to hit merchant vessels. Just put the boots on the ground already and round up these retards!
>>62048772He is doing the meme
I had AI give me an average for corrrections since 2012.which by the way, we're now just at the beginning of phase 3, the panic phase. Friday was the first day of itThere are two clocks in corrections:Slow distribution phase (weeks/months)Fast panic leg (what you’re measuring)The panic leg is usually:~1 to 2.5 months (30–75 days)Now apply to your current situationYou said:Sharp leg started: Feb 25, 2026So:30-day mark: ~Mar 27 (you’re here now)Average bottom window:Apr 10 – Apr 25Longer drawn-out case:could extend into MayImportant nuance (this matters a lot)The duration depends heavily on cause:Exogenous shock (COVID): fast ~1 monthPolicy / rates (2022): slower multiple legsLiquidity / positioning unwind: mid-range (~40–70 days)Bottom lineYour original intuition was basically correctThe “true crash phase” historically:~55 days on average (~2 months)You’re currently:~30 days in entering typical bottoming windowTypical “panic leg” shape (S&P 500 behavior)Across modern corrections, the drop is not linear. It usually follows this pattern:Phase 1 — Break (Days 0–15)Drawdown: -3% to -7%Market feels shaky but not panicked yetMany people still “buy the dip”Phase 2 — Acceleration (Days 15–35)Drawdown: -8% to -15%Volatility spikes hardNews flow turns negativeForced selling / de-risking startsThis is where most people realize: “this isn’t just a dip”Phase 3 — Panic / Exhaustion (Days 30–60)Drawdown: -12% to -25%Fastest declines happen hereIntraday swings get violentCapitulation days appearBottoms almost always occur in this windowPhase 4 — Base / chop (after bottom)Sharp bounceThen messy sideways retests
Another Trump family corporation
>>62048782Don't bring your AI garbage here please. If I would want to hear unqualified nonsense I'd just wait for the next Truthpost.
>>62048623Biking is fun though. t. takes a ride every day on summer and spring. i suspect that you're fat.
>>62048772Kinda like Putin's 3 day military operation
>>62048781not pictured: global recession going on in background
>>62048782From the wording,t hat sounds like GTP. Stop using it for investment advice, it is fucking awful for that.It told me a shitton of things which were flat out wrong when I tried around with it for a bit, it just sucks your dick too hard and will simply repeat whatever you said.
>>62048786>born just in time for 9/11>born just in time for MAGA>born just in time for COVID>born just in time for AI slop
>>62048782> Important nuance (this matters a lot)
>>62048786that silicon being you're denigrating just did hours of research mapping 50 correction bottoms for the last 10+ years, averaged it out, and built an explanation for the data. In just a few seconds. You should be grateful.
>>62048798I knew this was coming the second I saw that phrase
The tranny janny deleted the OP image
>>62048639big doubt. chains work just fine. what's actually important is narrow tires. i upgreaded to 28 mm ones a few years back, from 38 or something like that, and I'm pretty sure I go twice as far with each pedal rotation. you wind up a bit more unstable, but it's definitely worth it if you don't suck at cycling.
>>62048725>IslamabadYes, islam is bad
>>62048795I was using ChatGPT Pro. It's hardly wrong most times.
>>62048711gee chains are so great they use them instead of belts in engines. bike belts don't make sounds or stretch out until after many thousands more miles than you get out of a chain. I bet you wear a fanny pack and carry a bike repair kit with you everywhere you go. sorry m8 but most of us don't got time for that shit. you're a lbs employee nobody else has your concerns
>>62048804>"Pretty girls are off topic! Do you hear me?! Off topic!"genuinely hilarious how pissy they get. The frogs? Not an off topic imageAnime girl on a bike? Not an off topic imagePolitics? Not an off topic imageRandom AI stuff? Nope not an off topic imageBut a random pretty asian girl triggering their "ACK" tenancies? super off topic
>>62048811It doesn't matter what kind of bike you have as long as you get out there and do it. I just got back from the Fidelity office to go on a bike ride with my male broker and we both had a blast on our mid level mountain bikes.
>>62048811>chains are so great they use them instead of belts in enginesHe doesn't know about fords ecoboom.....
bitcoin is up! bullish!
I guess I'll stay up longer today to see the Nikkei open
>>62048816I didn't think it was possible to make that gay car any gayer.Well done.
>>62048783i wonder what hodler of truth social are thinking right now. the site was only ever used by a dwindling number of cultist maga boomers, and most of these have already soured on him. he's deeply unpopular, even among his own republican base. and in any case, he doesn't much time left. after he's gone, the whole thing will be worthless. Why is it still worth billions?
>>62048828>Man makes his little car work with some ingenuity >Called gay>Lifted truck alongside with nothing in it is perfectly normal
belt drive btw
It'd be kind of funny if this was the end of petrodollar as we know it. Might actually get Trump into the history books.
>>62048838That truck isn't lifted you manlet tranny
>>62048821short it
>>62048838Was more the brown leather steering wheel and stickers. The bike holder is a tour de force.
>>62048842The petrodollar literally already end 2 years ago anon.
Ok so battle plan for tomorrow is:>buy 3x Sugar>buy 3x Wheat>buy 3x Corn>buy 3x Oil>Short Nasdaq>Sell furniture to short Nasdaq even more
The Iranians are frontrunning tacos now.
>>62048838>lowest tier rwd tacoma>lifted
Will we be playing this on our speakers on Monday?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hoKluzn07eQ
>>62048856This is the guy the US is supposed to be negotiating with btw, he's a regime hardliner
>>62048816Ithis desu. 've got a $200 Hardtail Mtb and it does Downhill tracks just fine. Easyly earned Serotonin after a red day
trumps secret plan is to turn america into a bicycle country which I fully support in spite of political neutrality
