Ok, fellow yids, passover starts next week. 7-8 days of lots of feasting and celebrating our freedom from slavery in Egypt.DA RULES:>No chametz (Leavened grain) wheat, barley, oats, spelt, rye>No roasted meat for the sederMeat must be braised, fried, not cooked with direct heat (first night in Israel, first 2 outside of Israel)For Ashkenazi Jews>No kitniyot Legumes and seeds (quinoa ok)>No lamb for the seder(s)All other laws of kashrut apply(No pork or non kosher animals, no mixing milk and meat)What are you cooking?Are you incorporating seasonal and festive elements like spring vegetables, wine, matzah, bitter herbs etc?Are you just cooking the traditional foods like brisket and potatoes or are you going exotic?
>>20418578Pizza, rats and alligators
I think I'll pass
>>20418628>Pizza,Chometz, although matzah pizza is a popular American passover food>Rats and alligatorsUnfortunately not kosher
>>20418578there is no reason to remove all leavening from your house you don't even understand the point of unleavened bread.It means bread made too fast to have risen, not bread devoid of leavening.
>>20418765>there is no reason to remove all leavening from your house you don't even understand the point of unleavened breadIt's meant to be a big fuck you to ancient Egyptians who celebrated "leavening" of both bread and beer as not only a religiously important thing but also an Egyptian nationalistic symbol. Same concept as sacrificing a lamb (kherty) while the sun is in Aries. This coming from a semitic wine and lamb culture.
>>20418912>It's meant to be a big fuck you to ancient Egyptians who celebrated "leavening" of both bread and beer as not only a religiously important thing but also an Egyptian nationalistic symbol.So being whiny overly reactive cunts is actually baked into Jewish cultural history. That makes do much make sense.
>>20418912no it was because they had to leave quick and didn't have time for the bread to rise. if they did it like modern juice they would spend 1 week removing the "leavening" except from in the air which gets in the bread anyways so they still have leavening in it.either way it's a pointless tradition.
>>20418578whatever my temple has for the second night seder dinnerotherwise i eat like normal
>>20418578gotta be honest with you for a sec, i'm not a huge fan of that whole scene if you catch my drift
>>20418578I want to cook a Jew with direct heat
>>20420773Thats not kosher to eat a pig
>>20418578My gf is Jewish I have no idea what the fuck any of this stuff is
>>20420446>either way it's a pointless tradition.Just like the ritual genital mutilation of infant males but some barbaric weirdos still stick with it.
>>20421293A dog treat, a hardboiled egg, a redneck steak garnish, two precursors short of a salad, wine-soaked trail mix, and dipping sauce.Pretty simple.
>>20418578CharosetDeviled eggsMatzot "lasagna"Grilled chickenChicken tagineThai curry with chicken and quinoa. Coconut milk/cream is not dairy afterall (skip shrimp paste and use kosher fish sauce instead.)Smoked whitefishDill potatoesAlso can we agree that the fence laws are bs and unnecessary?
>>20418578Hey Rabbi can you explain to me which (commonly found) animals aren't kosher ? (Like goat, rabbit, horse, bison, boar, deer etc.)I tried looking it up online but it's all blog posts by American Jews that never get to the point.
>>20420446The whole holliday is a pointless tradition. Theyre celebrating someone else escaping bondage in egypt. Thats like fans celebrating their team winning playoffs. They had no hand in it, there's no reason to celebrate.
>>20418578Didn't ask.
>>20418754>Do I pass?, over. *radio crackle*
>>20418578My mom's going to make the charoset and matzo ball soup thats my great grandmas recipe. im gonna make a pre seasoned corned beef roast. we're not going to call any people over because she doesn't feel like it and I guess no one cares that much. half jew and indifferent.
u silly sheigetzlettuce is absolutely not chazeret. its marorthis is chazeret https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Chrain
>>20421484basically they have to be cloven-hooved, ruminant animalsunless theyre fish or fowlso goat, bison, deer is a yes but rabbit, horse, boar is a no
>>20418578Can I have rice and potato? I don't really eat much meat in the warm months
>>20424311Retardo. Chazeret is one of the species allowed to be used as maror. The talmud clearly stays that Aramaic "chazeret" is Hebrew "chasa" which is lettuce. Horseradish wasn't even known in the middle east at this time. Horseradish LEAF was eventually allowed to be used once Jews went to Eastern Europe and it was too cold for lettuce at this time of year. Eventually (1800s) horseradish root was allowed and that became standard for ashkis. But real marror is lettuce. Either way chrain is not allowed because it can't be mellowed with beets, sugar etc.
>>20424319what do iguanas or alligators count as?
>>20418578>no hurr durrstop living in the iron age and observing some goat fucker's dietary restrictions ffs
>>20425376It's fun to do for a week. I tend to follow as many fasting holidays as I can just for the fun of it. Passover is the easiest one. Eating grain and legume free is ridiculously easy for a week. And if you go too crazy you can just buy some jew bread (wouldn't recommend since it means giving jews money and we all know how this website feels about that)
>>20418578How do you roast an egg
>>20418578There is zero evidence the Exodus happened, before the Babylonians invaded Canaanites were polytheists worshiping discount versions of Sumerian gods while living under Egyptian rule. It's only after the real exodus to Babylon that the merged El/Yahweh figure took over and the Jewish identity emerged.
I'm technically Jewish but haven't done a passover seder since my mother died. My kid hasn't been to one before and we're going to one tomorrow. Problem is: it's fucking vegan. What would a vegan even use instead of the egg and bone?
>>20425517>El/Yahweh figureEl just means "god." It's not a particular deity and it's cognate with Arabic "allah" meaning the same thing.
>>20425356Fucking thank you. I'm not Ashkenazi Sui when I first heard of them using horseradish as the bitter herb, my first thought was "nigga, that shit ain't bitter." We use celtuce, which kinda looks like horseradish but is actually bitter.
>>20418912>It's meant to be a big fuck you to ancient EgyptiansThousands of years have passed and you "people" still hold a grudge, very rational indeed. I can't wait until you're all ovened.
>>20425517Well duh, it's a religious fairytale invented for propaganda purposes. It's a lie just like everything else they pretend to believe.
why do jews follow some made up rules from the talmud instead of the rules written in the torah?
>>20426679Same reason Catholics do lent.
>>20425709>picOh come on anon we always click both buttons at the same time
FINALLY DONEi made beef chicken and chocolate cakethe family is really fussy and particular about the seder and what food is served and how I hate this particular autismBUT ITS DONEoh we read a special prayer for israeli captives from oct 7 lol
Hold on guys, just have to trick God real quick.
>>20425555I didn't think you could make the Passover food any worse, but here you go.
>>20426908Kekked I live in a Christian neighborhood that's right next to a Jewish neighborhoodIf you had a time machine and brought someone here from the past they'd swear segregation never endedAnyway their neighborhood is called Hilltop but everyone calls it Jewtop
>>20426746based knower
>>20426908To be honest looking for loopholes instead of following a dogmatic set of regulations is just ingenuity, when people get all pissy about this it just seems like they're mad that other humans aren't literally NPCs that follow binary instructions.But I pirate my media, so I already don't respect dogmatic regulations and look for loopholes anyway, guess that makes me a "jew" to most people on this site.
>>20426753Fair enough Schlomo kek
>>20427401Finding loopholes in dogmatic restrictions imposed by others is one thing, but doing it for restrictions you impose on yourself is inherently dishonest and shows lack of integrity. Leftists do that sort of shit all the time, hell some even make careers out of it, which is part of why they're such amoral pieces of shit.
>>20427401>>20427557It just sounds like proof positive that these people will do all kinds of shit in the name of their fake god, but when it actually comes down to it they don't really believe any of it. Christians are exactly the same. They're all hypocrites.
>>20426759There are no captives left, Israel bombed them all to Sheol.
>>20418578wait a minute are all of the ops with this style written by jews? is this a jewish thing?
>>20418578>slavery in egypt>jewish workers were paidYou're making the claim that compensated employment is slavery.
The thing about antisemitism is that its the ultimate test of low IQ. When poeole hate something legitimately, its because of personal experience, like you hate Tom because he stole your savings from under your bed, or you hate sushi because of how it tastes. Nobody legotmayely has any interaction with religious Jews or Jews that outwardly show Jewishness because of any actual interaction, its because they are terminally online people that take collage memes of Talmud quotes and anecdotes from people on anime websites. You have to be a special kind of dumb to have no actual information on a subject and hate something.
>>20428165>Bombs kill youYeah that's typically how that works
>>20428384I wasn't antisemetic for most of my whole life. But when I see the state of Israel committing genocide in plain sight and showing absolutely zero mercy to the people they stole the land from 80 years ago or even understanding why that population would still be upset... Sorry but my opinion changed. They are using their religious fairytales as an excuse to murder everyone who dares to have lived on the land they have decided are theirs. Then Jews all over, many who up until a few months ago act like its no big deal, Israel has a right to "defend" itself and they give zero shits that the IDF purposefully tracks targets until they get home so they can murder as many women and children in the attack as possible. Any ethnic Jewish person who understands the horror and is anti-zionist is still fine in my books. But it is patently clear now that the religion at it's core is violent and uncaring towards everyone else. I have zero sympathy for any religious Jew at this point. If you still support your religion, you are a force for evil in this world and should be dealt with as such. >>20428394>>20428165>>20426759Also remember, Israel has killed some of their own people who were prisoners already. They came out waving white flags hoping to be rescued, but because the goal of the IDF is to indiscriminately murder everyone they see, they didn't bother to even check that they were escaped Israeli hostages and just gunned them down on sight.
>>20428417So are all Germans evil because of the Holocaust? Are all Chinese evil because of Mao? Because that's your logical reasoning.
>>20426914Eh, you don't go to passover to be fed. If you show up hungry, ya dun goofed. As I implied, I'm not really terribly Jew-y, especially considering certain things about my anatomy, I was just curious what in the shit they could possibly use that's vegan. That said, I had shrimp with lunch today (shrimp pasta salad I made) so following Jew rules (Jewles?) isn't really anything I give much of a shit about, especially not when it comes to food.
>>20428417Okay so just want to understand you, all land should be given back to the very first people to inhabit it, and if you are in a land you conquerered then you can't defend it?
>>20428453No of course not silly, it only applies to jews of course
>>20428449Stop making sense he wants to think he has legitimate claim to hate Jews
>>20428449All Germans who supported the holocaust are evil, as are those who supported Mao. Also, Christian Zionists, the ones funding the bulk of this war are also equally evil. All this bullshit fueled by religious doctrine is pure evil. If the US wanted to give Jews some land where they wouldn't be persecuted, there is plenty of land in that country. They purposefully kicked the population of Palestine out, declared it was now theirs and anyone who doesn't like it gets murdered. >>20428453Unironically, yes. This genocide is happening because Israel was attacked by people who have been living under oppression since their land was taken. If you're fine with your land being taken by force, just post your address so I can come murder your family and take your house because my god says I own everything.
>>20428461It's proof you're evil that you're not also saying that murdering innocent children is even wrong. You're just saying "but someone else did it! So leave me alone, it's our right to commit war crimes in plain site!"
>>20428470Palestinians merely have seller's remorse. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jewish_land_purchase_in_Palestine
>>20428496If you weren't so openly evil it would be almost humorous how completely shameless you subhumans are. At least keep this in mind when the next holocaust starts, synagogues get burnt down and you and your children get raped before being tossed in an oven why you have been so justifiably been persecuted through the centuries.
I just hate Jews and honestly think all of you should be gassed, it's really as simple as that.
why do the mods let so much blatant antisemitism go? it's racism outside of /b/, it's against the rules.
>>20429330>OYYYYYYY shut it down!
>>20429330>why do the mods let so much blatant antisemitism go? it's racism outside of /b/, it's against the rules.Are Jews a separate race, or are they members of a religion? If they are a race, does that justify their own racism against goyim? (Check out the books of Moses in the Old Testament for PLENTY of examples of racism, not to mention an outright endorsement of the enslavement of non-Jews)
>>20429330The mods are leftists. They hate jews, too.
>>20418578>chametzWe already have a loophole regarding this by citing Rambam, according to him only water turns flour into hametz therefore any other liquid doesn't make the dough hametz, you can take a step further and bake the dough under 18 minutes but baking soda is agreed to be fine, baking with matza flour is always foolproof
>>20429367Jews are an ethic group and a religious group
>>20429412>Jews are an ethic group and a religious groupJust like Christians, Muslims, and Scientologists, right?
>>20429412More like an ethnic group with its own religion, like Hindus or the Japanese or every ethnic group before the axial age.
>>20429330
>>20429437You can't have it coth ways. Either you hate Jews because they are an ethnic group or you're just screeching about rich white people who happen to have a religion you don't like.
>>20429466>You can't have it coth ways. Either you hate Jews because they are an ethnic group or you're just screeching about rich white people who happen to have a religion you don't like.I like this discussion. So Jews are white people. The same people that enslaved Blacks.
Christ is king.
>>20427967>>20427557wrong, God literally approves of jews lawyering him; this is very literally an actual practice in Judaism and built into the religion itsel. jews believe law made by God is literally LAW and not transcendental divine order. Jacob essentially wins a court case against God in the old testament
>>20429481*Joshua not Jacob
>>20429481>wrong, God literally approves of jews lawyering him; this is very literally an actual practice in Judaism and built into the religion itsel. jews believe law made by God is literally LAW and not transcendental divine order. Jacob essentially wins a court case against God in the old testamentYou do realize we can all tell that you are not a yid, right? Yids don't spell out "God," they always censor it, since their god is Lucifer, who demands that they always deceive the goyim.
>>20429489Schizophrenia is very common among a certain religious order. On an unrelated note, a certain Jew is my favorite superhero.
>>20418578>passover foodsThanks but I’ll pass
>>20429475now you've just gone full circle to hating white people. you /pol/tards are hilarious
>>20429527>Thanks but I’ll passHave you ever wondered about what passover food might taste like when flavored with the blood and fat of goyim children? I'm not trying to suggest that this ever was a thing, because it's obviously not. But if it was, how much would you be willing to pay to try it?
>>20429527>le orangedon't even go to seder if you're gonna be a self hating faggot
>>20429496Not that anon but I'm >>20425581/>>20425555/>>20428450, a Jew (not a yid, since that term refers only to Ashkenazi Jews because they speak YIDish) and say God, Elohim, Yahweh, Jehovah and all that other shit because it's all just faerie stories, anyway. I fucking eat pork and shellfish, ffs. Had shrimp for lunch today, in fact, as stated.>>20428450They used a beet for the bone and "Japanese white eggplant" for the egg. I asked the Rabbi who hosted how the beet fulfills the requirement and was assured that it's perfectly acceptable and followed the rules.My kid was tired af because he's usually in bed and asleep by 7.30 but the seder didn't start until 6.45 because TRADITION.
>>20429500Wanda Maximoff?
>still following orders from some fag who lived 2000 years ago cos traditionsNgmi
Just leave the children alone
>>20429481>you see God actually WANTS us to transfer our sins into the souls of chickens and beat them to death so the chickens go to hell instead of us, we're his chosen people after all
>>20430181How do you know He doesn't?
>>20430191Because if that is the case then I challenge Gods authority based on basic logic. I am now God. Prepare your anus.
Lot of jews here. Who is making sure /gif/ and /b/ are spammed with blacked threads?
>>20430191How do you know he does, pedophile?
>>20430209They're splitting their attention, they do it on /v/ and /tv/ too. It never ends, infinite stream of kikes, indians, and white trannies spamming cuckshit
>>20426908Lmfao how are these people real
>>20429412>>20429330This isn't against ethnic jews who oppose the genocide going on (ie intelligent ones) this is against Zionist religious jews who use their fairytale books to justify murdering children and then act shocked when told that's evil. Secular jews are fine. It's people who follow an evil religion that gives them the supposed right to commit evil it's name who need to be dealt with.
>Me after catching a goy trying to eat the afikoman during the middle of a Passover Seder.
