Just realized that these things don't even use real cheese but "imitation mozarella" what the fuck? How did I not know this? How goddamn cheap do you have to be to not even use real cheese in your fucking frozen pizza? I get these things aren't known for quality but come on, that's the LEAST you could do.
>>21103471>authentic italian since 1930
well, it's real mozarella just 'stretched' with starchwhat do you expect when you are buying the absolute cheapest shit in the freezer section?
>>21103471>How did I not know this?When you eat literal slop all your life you get a shit palette. Pretty obvious.
>>21103471imitation mozarella is healthy
>>21103520So that's why the frozen pizza anon cooked just a day ago looked like browned bread, where as my real cheese pizza is either melted or burnt, no inbetween.
>>21103471this shit is cheap as shit but I need to eat at least three to get full
>>21103517Makes sense sense Italian pizza is hot garbage
>>21103471i only know of this brand from the movie don't tell mom the babysitter's dead
>>21103738when i rewatched that movie recently it made me remember when i was a kid they used to have full size Celeste Pizzas, wonder why those went away after the mid 90s, i remember them tasting better than the personal ones
Could you not easily tell by the taste, texture, and simple sight of the stuff?
>>21103746https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6_fApwdrok0they had a big variety of them in the 70s and 80s back when it was probably better quality
>>21103751Dude, I'm not a food critic, I'll eat just about any slop. How the hell am I supposed to tell whether or not something is using real mozerella or not from taste alone? Obviously the taste is pretty boring but I don't really know the signs to look for.
>>21103471my local lidl currently has an offer for 4 frozen salami pizzas at $5.96 and one with 4 cheese pizzas for $3.76. they somehow are above average but i don't expect any ingredient from that box to be real
>>21103471been doing carnivore recently and the 400+ calorie thing turns me off, now it's fake cheese I guess I missed. Just searched my local grocery site and there's wheat crusts for 170 cal each, i'd rather put my own cheese and pepperoni on that shit. I already have a bottle of sauce. Get fucked celeste!
>>21103471Those are sold in dollar storesWhat do you want, fresh buffalo moz?
>>21103471I'd try it but I doubt it's not any good. Thanks for the rec oP
>>21103471The wild part is this shit isn't even close to the worst pizza I've had
>>21103471>college-kid-level frozen slop>complains about the quality
>>21104192what was the absolute worst?
>>21104665Screamin Sicilian
>>21103471the imitation mozarella that Celeste uses unironically tastes good. no one eats a celeste pizza to get the natural ingredient experience lol
>>21104665I dob't remember, it was a long time ago. The worst consistently bad I've had in recent memory is from Big Y's bakery - everyone gets them for big events but they're school cafeteria tier at best.
>>21103471Fun fact: even real cheese labelled mozzarella isn't mozzarella.
>>21103520yeah this is why legal definitions bug methey give you X percentage you have to meet, and if you go over, you get no benefit. if you go under, you have to call it imitation or 'chocolatey'but just.. let them say percentage. if it's 80% mozzarella, then let them say that. People understand 90% lean hamburger has more beef in it than 80% lean. they know what they're buying and what they wanna pay for.
>>21105800>but they're school cafeteria tier at best.What cafeteria?School cafeteria pizza in America is great
>>21106019>What cafeteria?>School cafeteria pizza in America is greatJoking, right? The schools I went to had pizza like soggy bread topped with ketchup and american cheese.
>>21104820not them but screamin sicilian is mid to low mid imo.>>21106019>>21106116school cafe pizza in america SUCKSunless they get take out.I'd say my personal worst frozen pizza is tombstone. The sauce tastes cheap, the bread tastes cheap, the cheese isn't that much different but it still feels/looks cheap.
>>21106116>>21106203Sorry that you two went to inner city shithole schools that served shit pizzas
>>21106252I lived in a white neighborhood though...>>21106203
I tried celeste pizza once and I threw it out after one bite. It's not just bad, it's straight up offensive.
>>21103471Moleste
cheese analogues are really interesting
>>21106369It's okay if you air fry it. But Microwave is absolutely terrible floppy mess. >>21106116jeez. I remember school cafeteria pizza never being anything too special but it was never absolutely terrible or using ketchup or american cheese. The texture was there it was just mediocre
>>21106790apparently, even though i went to a different school every year and their quality varied, there are still schools way better and way worse than all of the ones I went to. Go fig. different economies, different funding.
I used to house these in high-school when I worked in a supermarket. I'd grab one on my pittence 15 minute break, nuke it, then fold it in half and eat it like a taco with some Frank's.Slopkino.
