confess
I want to be a woman but I'm in a committed relationship with my girlfriend of 3 years and want to remain close to my family. I feel trapped in this body but at the same time I love those around me and I don't want to betray them by breaking the image they have of me.
>be 9 years old>cut limes and dip them in granulated sugar>suck the sugar off>repeat until lime juice is gone>warm bread in microwave>slather mayonnaise on it and eat it>find powder milk in pantry>eat dry spoonfuls of it>use to do the same with dry baby formula>make my dolls and action figures have sex
I've been on a disastrous cutting then binging cycle for the past two years. As a result, my physique basically has not changed and my weight has stayed the same. The fact that I've been spinning my gears for two entire years is giving me existential dread.
Progress in the gym takes second priority to me being lean and stress-free
>>74607695This needs no absolving. It is not a sin.All the more, good for you.
>>74607625>Be me>Total autist>Cuban girl who invited me to quincienera calls me years later>Wants to watch movie with me>Uh, ok>In my gold coin era>Have tons of Sacagawea gold coins from bank>Enjoy paying for a coffee with all gold and silver coins (before inflation so coffee was about 1 or 2 dollars)>Hangout with her>She makes me take a bunch of rum shots>Watch scary movie >She's getting really close>Kiss her and play with her titties a bunch >Whip out dong, and start to get oral sex>She noticed all of the gold coins from my pocket scattered all over her couch>Gets confused, laughs>Finished movie without sex>End up sleeping with her after I collect my shiny gold coins and put them back in my pocketI never told anyone about this, but it's one of the retarded things I've done.
My wife is getting fatter by the day and there's nothing I can do about it other than lose weight myself and hope she catches the drift.
>>74607625I just got fast food a couple hours ago
>>74607625Toast for breakfast and gnocchis with some Italian sausage sauce (forgot the name) for dinner and accidentally ordered cheesecake for dessert
I just ate taco bell, I'm supposed to be cutting, and saving money.
>>74607625I haven't eaten carbs in so long that I've forgotten how long it has been
I fear I have meme'd myself into bulimia, I have moments of weakness maybe once a month and binge on unhealthy shit like chocolate then feel really guilty and force it back up. My cut is going great and this doesn't happen when I stay on track with my diet but I feel this may be the ripples of an underlying mental issue. I'm going to see if I can control it first before seeing a doctor.
>>74607653Seek God and get off the internet cold turkey. This will unironically fix you if you do it with an earnest heart. You are mentally disturbed and people will try to take advantage of you and tell you that you need to take hormone altering drugs and get body mutilating surgeries to feel comfortable in your own body. You'll end up either killing yourself out of misery and regret or dying of sepsis once your artificial gash gets infected from being kept open and unable to heal. I'll pray for you bro
I love chubby chicks with big asses
I had 4 pieces of home made pizza last night and now I weigh 3 lbs more than yesterday. NGMI
>>74607683Did you get stronger?
>>74607625pulled an all nighter on the chans, slept 3h from 8 to 11, and tomorrow's my first day at work where I want to get up at 6:15 and have a sharp brain on me
On work days, I can go the whole day without eating, ending my night in a 500-1000 calorie deficit. But on my off days at home, I always end up eating 500-1000 calories over and ruining my cut. Why am I such a stupid weak willed self-sabotaging faggot? I could be losing 2lbs a week instead of the .5lbs I currently am.
>>74607625I ate too much on vacation
>>74607728I think a lot of DND type women would find this charming
>>74607728that's genuily the cutest retarded thing you could pull off, what are you ? a leprechaun scattering gold wherever you go ?
>>74609998das rite, better be in your top form to impress boss shekelberg so he will let you wageslave for him
>>74610127first day at work, after 8 years of neetdom
>>74607625the more i'm into fitness, the more i get intrusive thoughts about being '' aggressively affectionnate'' and '' dominant' and '' bitting and scratting but because i like you'' maybe there is something very wrong in my chocolate flavored whey.
>>74607695>endless bulking and cutting, chasing incremental and ephemeral muscle gainsgym samsara>leanpill, general athleticism, fun physical activity with friendsgym nirvana
>>74607657kek
>>74607728The confession is supposed to be fitness related.
>>74609643water weight
>>74610127Fuck off useless NEET leech
>>74610323sex is cardio
>>74607653>I feel trapped in this body>so I'm going to make it even worse and look like a total fucking freakshowI don't get trannies. Just crossdress and fap and get it out of your system, start actually lifting and build a nice fuhzeek
I fucked up my elbow rock climbing and doing grip exercises, have to take a month off. I've been really anxious. I ain't got a place to blow off all my energy and have been smoking too much pot because I'm bored and can't do gym/climbing shit.
i lift to attract other menstill too afraid to hookup because of stds and what my church will think of meeven worse is they see i'm /fit/ which has increased the attention on my lack of gf
>>74607625I don't shower, put on deodorant, or do any attempt to groom myself when I go to the gym on weekend mornings. It's an apartment gym so not as bad but I've noticed that when I show up and there's a woman there, every time, by pure coincidence, she will leave within 15 minutes. On the 1 hand I feel bad but on the other it means I get the gym to myself.
>>74607728>cums>scatters gold coins everywhereMamma mia!
>>74610416>even worse is they see i'm /fit/ which has increased the attention on my lack of gfI was /fit/ as hell for years and had no gf. I was also really introverted but I still could talk to people effectively, so I came to understand that people presumed I led a busy social life and they just only saw a tiny bit of it. People might presume you're getting laid but are just humble about it and stow the 'locker room talk'
>>74607625Dear fürher, I ate bread, and it was incredibly good. I slathered it with garlic flavoured green cheese, with a few slices of luncheon meat. It was good and filling, but now I am plagued with stomach discomfort. I hope this too shall pass, hail hitler.
>>74610339seethe
>>74610409only works if it's a regular agp kink, no such luck if it's gender dysphoriaaight lemme get my pinkpill on>>74607653listen here you lil shit, if you've got this, you know it'll only get worse with time. start treating it. you deserve a less shit life. not that tranning up is gonna be a walk in the park, but you've been to repgen to see what happens
>>74607625I ate 5000 calories worth of carbs today.
>>74608475Tell her straight up she's fat. She's not gonna like it, but it's the truth. She can either buy tents for clothes to adorn herself or be so fit and hot that she doesn't even need clothes and walks around the house in all her naked glory.
>>74610417>Average pajeet
>>74611484Ok I can tell you're single
>>74611717Am married
>>74607625I think i loved my ex a bit too hard and now i have reallllly hard time with emotions. >lomg story short she is ms red flag we lived together for 3 years and then split but kept meeting for 15 years more. Imho we both felt we were genetic match, i ate her pussy as much as she blew me and i cant even imagine how much we fucked, like few time every aingle day for years. We did and said everything you could read in a book or see in a porn video. I could not get her out of my head but i hope she got me out.>advice to forget a dear person whom i objectivelly should not like? Meditation doesnt work. >imho it is remaints of oxycotin hormone which binds into braain hardware. I am not so bad to do heavy drugs to forget but i am open to meditation, adventure etc.>got a new gf and shes genuinely fun. Idk what to try with her now.. maybe more dangerous things i couldnt do with ex?
>>74607657Sounds like a normal childhood
>>74611858Oh and we said final FINAL goodbye about 10 months ago. So thats that. Help me get over this trashy woman so i can ascend. I want my zero to hero moment
Last night the DOMS in my legs made me so ravenously virile I busted 3 nuts back to back to back and almost passed out on the toilet
>>74607625ive promised myself to fix myself as i've fallen in rut, im the worst physical shape ive ever been in, i got fat(120kgs at 190cm/255lb at 6'2 for burgers) and ive been jerking off more than ever and the weirdest thing is i've just been jerking off to my gfs nudes and vids we made even though we have sex regularly(once or twice usually every two days), my sleep was pretty fucked up too and i was lazy to finish anything ive started.so far ive managed to somewhat fix my sleep schedule, sometimes with help of melatonin, ive started jogging every morning but my left knee got fucked so i cant do that anymore and the thing ive been pissed off the most about is my food intake/dieting has been absolute shit. I say no more candy and snacks and then i go to the store and still buy that shit, even though i try to eat mostly chicken and veggies i get lazy to make the food so i just order some garbage
I'll be staying in a shitty dorm for two months. it's the first time in years I feel like not cooking os the way to go. I'll eat OMAD and wither away from the looks of it.
>>74611858same man, its the worst because i just dont know if ill ever find someone who i click with like that sexually again
