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first for cyberChuds everwhere

how get job

>>101110308
Anons I want to start a company helping small businesses manage SaaS and cloud infra - which roles should I be speaking to? Was thinking either IT or DevOps leads.
Anyone have any experience with similar products?

>>101110611
>(((SaaS)))
>cloud infra [read:Someone else's computer]
Realign yourself. It'd be DevOps though, as identifying needs and securing deployment config are all in that remit

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Why not adding a simple curtain?

>>101110308
pretty good gender ratio in that pod!

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Why does this field exist?

Everything is overbuilt and over designed now. I despise the entire UX industry for what they did to quality, fun UI work. They stole every ounce of soul from interfaces in the name of “research”. I’ve not met a single UX researcher that could actually design anything. They’re glorified business analysts and they clearly can’t even do that right because at least business analysts can create requirements from real customer problems. UX research exists purely to only serve itself.

UX designers are so passive aggressive and self-satisfied. I do not give two shits about drop shadows or rounded corners or animations. I want to use the fuckin software tool to do fuckin work.

Being honest, I don't know where the UX industry even came from. They just appeared one day in the early to mid 2010s and proceeded to ruin every single piece of good and usable UI known to mankind.
The computing world was at peace until then, we had UI designers and engineers who through much research and trial-and-error produced very nice UIs for us to use. The UX industry came in and destroyed all that for shits and profits; literal decades of experience and precedence thrown out the window in the name of the latest fashion trend.

I think that generally, UX in software is dismal. Modern software tends to be hard to use, hard to figure out how to do things in, and generally opaque and lacking in discoverability.

I tend to blame the UX field generally for this, as that seems to be where the things leading to this problem have come from.

>>101111328
By limiting the number of males in the pod you also limit the potential rapes and rapes per hour. All in all is a perfect patriarchal relationship where women will take turns worshiping the incel male cock over the course of the month and the single male won't feel the urge of assaulting any of the whales orbiting his cock. It's empowering and another important victory for women everywhere in the pod systems

>>101111380
we need a vault 69 experiment to see what would happen if 100 females were required to share 1 male. I wouldn't expect the male to last more than a week.

>>101110308
Sir, quick call?

>>101111454
I would start with a 1/10 ratio and go from there

>>101111279
You must be always visible to the pod inspector. Sex/masturbation/drug use are not allowed in your pod.

>>101111466
>can you stay on after the meeting for 5 minutes
100% it's either:
- a question that could have been asked and answered in a chat message
- a long-winding discussion that should have involved 5 people and have been allocated for at least 50 minutes

>>101111486
>MALE SPECIMEN #3 PRESENT YOUR GENITALS AT ONCE IT IS TIME FOR MY REGULAR TAST- AHEM YOUR INSPECTION

>>101110308
>>101111486
what totalitarian goolag is this?

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>Godot

>>101110392
we're full

>>101111174
Realign myself to what? Are small businesses going back to on-prem?

>>101110611
I don't know why you want to target customers who often don't have money for what you are offering. Small companies do not have people in those roles you listed. If it is truly a small company, you are talking to a CEO/CTO/Technical founder.

The way I have seen consultancies built before is first being an independent contractor at a globohomo-megacorp and establishing a good business relationship with middle management. After that you hire couple of cheap dudes and get them to work for this same customer through you. Once your company gets to 5-7 people, you start diversifying your customer base. You basically use use the big company as your lifeblood for the first couple of years and pray that they don't cut you off.

>>101110308
How do they use technology in those pods? Would Tiffany complain if Yan was using a vibrator?

>>101111355
>Why does this field exist?
Retards, unironically.
I've worked with many designers and they thing of themselves as artists, they put form over function every single time and have no idea how to use a computer or design a good UI.
They cater to the lowest form of user and build interfaces around them.

>>101111998
That's kind of the point though. Every person I've spoken to that manages their companies software/infra say it's a shit show when they join because everyone was just buying themselves and configuring it however they wanted, which causes costs to blow up (and they bring in IT/DevOps)
I want to prevent businesses from getting to that point; it's a pure money saver.

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>>101112448
dude

>>101109639
>It is a political organization that are usually used to influence policy that it's members want
not sure the chud mechanics at my plant want more guatemalans and more trannies

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I'm sick of every house near my apartment being 500K or more and not being able to afford it. What is the quickest way for me to go form 115K USD salary to something like 200?

>>101110308
Ahh mouse utopia.

>>101112698
As in they're only speaking to me because it's a shit show? What would you say are the real problems then, ones that are worth focusing on?

>>101113926
Sell drugs.

>>101113926
Get in touch with your local jews, see if they need any exotic or clandestine services.

>>101113926
do you have a daughter?

is there any job for a worthless emotional wreck like me?

>>101114584
I'm not whoring out my daughter

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I've realized it's easier to get 2 40k jobs than 1 80k in Europe and I'm going to be making moves and possibly start committing fraud

>>101114745
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/-T86JS-U9nM?app=desktop

>>101114845
>tfw no white pajeeta overworked gf

>>101114726
ok well you can either sell your daughter or you can rent for life. oh by the way i'll be raising the rent next month!

>>101114745
I wondered how long I could get away with getting a second job and do virtually nothing.

does anyone here work internal IT desk? Why?

As far as I can tell the work looks shitty dealing with boomers who answer phishing emails and replacing mice. They often have basic linux and powershell knowledge.

Can they generally not properly code? Why would they work these lower paid shitty jobs.

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>>101115085
I'd just need to survive the probation period, after it I'd just coast and here is harder for companies to fire you because of socialism and job "rights" meant initially for factory drones, so they'd essentially be stuck with me

>>101115225
I haven't gone back into the office despite being told to for like 2 years now and they still haven't fired me

>>101115297
zero fucks givers, we keep winning

Entering 4th year CS, working at a startup this summer and did a 16 month internship at well-known company before that. Idk if I want to work for either post-grad, but i don't want to delay grad again and find a new company to intern for. what do?

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>be me
>senior software engineer at big tech company
>work from home because coof
>figure out that as long as I keep Slack and emails open, no one really knows what I'm doing
>start the day by logging in and saying good morning in the team chat
>proceed to do absolutely nothing productive for the next 8 hours
>instead of coding, i'm playing video games, lifting and doomscolling on /g/
>every now and then, I send a random technical message in Slack to seem engaged
>"Hey, did we consider using microservices for that new project?"
>everyone thinks I'm a proactive team player
>get invited to a lot of meetings
>most of the time, I just nod along and say "sounds good" or "I'll look into that"
>become known as the guy who asks all the right questions
>once a month, submit a small code update that I whipped up in an hour
>somehow become the go-to person for advice on complex issues
>bullshit my way through technical explanations with a lot of buzzwords
>"It's all about leveraging our existing infrastructure to maximize throughput while minimizing latency"
>nobody questions me because I sound confident
>every performance review, I get glowing feedback
>"You're a real asset to the team, anon"
>get promoted twice in the span of a year (now Senior Software Engineer III, nice title HR department, very cool)
>huge salary bump and more stock options
>mfw my daily routine is basically just slacking off while getting paid more than ever
who else /slacking/ here?

unfortunately some of the j*nior and m*d level devs underneath me have realized i'm a bum so the clock is ticking, but i'll just find a new remote job, try really hard for 6 months, and then ease back into coasting mode. who knew life could be so beautiful?

>>101115199
Entry point to the industry. I work an internal IT job and will be pursuing further education on my own time. No other openings responded to me so I’m happy I found something tech adjacent.

>>101115426
undeniably based and coastingpilled

>>101113926
OF

>>101115426
how do you avoid your work laptop going into sleep mode or screen lock? Are those mouse jigglers legit?

what are some other message examples to look engaged? Are you constantly asking junior devs for features?

I need more details, please teach me senpai

>>101115585
>how do you avoid your work laptop going into sleep mode or screen lock? Are those mouse jigglers legit?
just disable sleep. i keep my work macbook at my feet and touch the trackpad with my toes (not joking)

>what are some other message examples to look engaged?
suggest random architectural changes with diagrams i whip up in draw(dot)io. scheduling an email to be sent late at night or on the weekend also does wonders for creating the illusion of productivity

>Are you constantly asking junior devs for features?
more or less, yeah. once you hit senior at most places you're more of a "big picture" guy, whatever the fuck that means. so I just spew some half-baked idea about how to maybe implement something and then hand it over to a junior to actually type the code.

>>101115426
I have done no work for 3+ years it has driven me mad and I am going back to university to do a masters.
I paid off all my student debt and my upcoming masters course in cash savings because I worked a close to 6 figure salary living with my parents for all that time

>>101115620
>i keep my work macbook at my feet and touch the trackpad with my toes
I kneel

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>>101115620
avoiding sleep mode? Pretending I am working?
orange teams icon 7 out of 8 hours a day, no fucks given, just dare try get rid of me

>>101115426
This reminded me of dealing with a senior that was coasting. Not on the software end but engineering. He wasn't even hiding the fact he was coasting and was boldly talking about it to everyone. Would say that he would stop working after 2 hours and start doing house projects on his new house. Fucker tried to use me as his patsy.

>gave me all of his shit jobs
>pissy because I didn't know everything he should be doing
>pissy I wasn't getting him the results he was looking for
>pissy I wasn't waiting hand and foot for him to offload his work onto my plate
>pissy if he finds out I'm done early and can go by the engineering manager then tries to quickly unload his work

He really did try to give me all of his work. Since I didn't let him, I think he got me on the chopping block to get me laid off. I was so close to getting senior level, too. Fuck that guy. Coast if you want but don't be fucking obnoxious and stupid about it.

>>101115629
>I paid off all my student debt and my upcoming masters course in cash savings because I worked a close to 6 figure salary living with my parents for all that time
you fumbled. should've kept hoarding money living with mom & pops while barely working. save a couple mil and fuck off to Belgium or some shit. retard.

>>101116001
>Coast if you want but don't be fucking obnoxious and stupid about it
We are in the food chain, my dude. Hunt or be hunted

>>101116001
you should aspire to become a pseudo-aristocrat bum senior engineer instead of seething with envy masqueraded as "holier than thou" """work ethic""" slop

>>101116001
you blew it moron, it's your responsibility to eat shit for a bit as a junior like he did

>>101115426
I'm in a similar boat, but instead of slacking, I'm so good at my job that I finish all my work before they can give me new stuff.
I've learned at this point it's better not to ask for work because they give me meaningless busywork. When they want something they'll ask.
I spend downtime grinding algorithms so I'll be able to job hop if there's ever a good opportunity.

>>101116060
Don't get me wrong, I hate working and avoided it when I can. I just didn't like him trying to throw his own project crap onto me when I have zero knowledge or business about it just so he can throw me under the bus later.

>>101116074
I wouldn't have minded if it was reasonable. I wasn't going to do his job and mine.

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>>101110308
Honestly podlife isn't so bad you guys. Especially for professionals!

>>101116226
If I'm traveling and visiting a city for a few days then sure but I'm not living in one for longer than a week.

>>101116226
Speaking as a professional I'd pay a premium for that!

My old boss was the owner of a private github repo in which I did 99% of the contributions. He was using github for projects that were not associated with the company. After leaving the company, I found that I lost access to the repo, and he created a new public repo with a huge initial commit and without attributing me. I feel betrayed as he is personally claiming the code I have written as his own. Is there anything I can do?

>>101116319
this is why you GPG sign commits, anon.

>>101115426
I did that for a few months but I it was a really small team and I think they started to catch on. Towards the end I started to put in a few hours of work a day and then I ended up leaving for a different reason.

>>101115585
My company gave me two laptops: the corporate laptop with Teams etc, and the unmanaged dev laptop. Oh I didn't respond to your Teams message for 24 hours? Sorry I was working on the dev laptop.

>>101110308
anyone have the auschwitz edit of this?

Senior QA Automation Engineer here, ask me anything

>>101116518
does your process work or do you still deploy rancid jeet shit on the regular

>>101116319
DMCA his repo
You own the copyright to the code you've written

>>101116518
how long is your dick?

>>101116538
My QA process works, yes, we make sure to have the testing environment updated with every merge to master and properly tested every day with a 3k automated tests battery. That doesn't keep us free from rancid jeet shit on the regular tho

>>101116553
Not that long, around 5.5 inches

>>101115426
Absolutely based.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YHxwY3Fz2gU

I too realized that working hard only leads to more work. I asked for a raise and got one that was laughable, so I adjusted my work time instead.

I rented a house by the sea because the doctor advised that climate for a bullshit health issue I made up.
So far I'm doing next to nothing work related but my fishing skills have improved a lot.

>>101116726
>My QA process
are "senior engineers" actually in charge of anything in SWE or is it just a salary title? i'm a "principal engineer" and i don't do shit, not in software though

>>101116771
We're in charge of our own department, most importantly in charge of the Juniors below us. Being in charge means you have to make sure everything works as it should and if a change is required, be it process-wise or personel-wise then you have to work through it.

>>101111611
if you don't know by now, you're not gonna know

what's the rate of progess in 'no code' frontier in AI? Given the massive valuation of nvidia, don't you think investors are trying their best to get their share of the pie because no code literally means those who own the machines generating 'no code' software get all the money.

>>101115691
>orange teams icon
>not using High Contrast for that terminal effect
ngmi

>>101116001
>>101116319
I am making a people review website to expose such lowly people, who I came across as well. feel free to sign up to the waitlist: https://forms.gle/tZt9B9BntJ5t5FCA9

>>101116330
qrd?

>>101116226
honestly based. you can take a pod anywhere you want. you could put one under a bridge for fuck's sake. this is the future, we're all going to be curled up in our pods posting on 4chan

>>101117166
generate private key
post public key online
sign commits with the private key

they will be appended with "Signed-Off-By: anon@4chan.org" and original authorship can be verified via the public key.

>>101117235
>copy your public key
>paste it under my own commit
>claim you wrote shitty malicious code
i never understood how these are supposed to actually be a proof of identity. what happens if i just delete it? what if i put my own key there instead?

>>101117264
only the oringal public key which was generated via the private key derivation can actually decrypt the commit. do anons not know how extraordinarily basic public/private key encryption works? do you think I could steal the public SSL key that 4chan uses and claim that I'm moot?

>>101110308

Why would hipsters willingly live as gerbils?

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Wait a second..... so you're saying that "Techlead" dude was just a fake scummy grifter like all the others?
https://youtu.be/QvcveeY9WKY

>>101117357
I guess this whole middle-class nomad/homeless living fits into their artsy lifestyle. But it's safe, because podshare rent prices are pretty high, so they don't have to live with actual hobos.

>>101117393
I don't watch youtube drama whores but I still believe that techlead never actually worked any fagman job.

>>101117295
are you saying the commit story cant be modified? thats sounds unbeliavleble

>>101117393
based if true

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>>101113926
>only 500K+
try 900K MINIMUM for even a CONDO here in SOCAL where this shit is out of CONTROL. it's not like I'm paying 2400 in rent each month for my 2bed apartment or anything! hahahah!!!!!!

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>>101115426
This but only working 3 hours a day at most. Promoting is pretty much sorted for this quarter too.

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might move to vancouver

Why do women have such an easier time in tech, is there a way to harness this somehow

>>101117932
Management tries to push them. Some HR roastie complained to my boss that there were no women in the development team and he literally told her to fuck off.

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>>101117932
autistic incels drawn to computer jobs, all total pushovers
>"heehee hey Tyler can you take these tickets for me? :3 ^_^"
>"y-you too"

>>101117010
It's over.

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>>101118183
Oh it's definitely fucking over

>>101117956
>and he literally told her to fuck off.
kek how did he get away with that

>>101115426
its pretty funny when you realize you can do at most 1-2 hours of work a day and outperform everyone else. the average tech worker is so clueless they have no idea what being productive means or what software dev actually is

Odds I take tomorrow off
Evens I roll again

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>>101118807
ahhhhh no monday meetings for me

I've been "working" on this ticket for a week.
I have no fucking idea what it's even wanting me to do so I've just kind of been scrolling up and down the file I think might be involved.
I don't want to do standup tomorrow.

>>101117070
No one gives a fuck about your presence indicator as long as you get your stuff done and show up to meetings.

Hell they hardly even care about showing up to meetings.

>>101115297
The biggest thing I learned with the vaccine mandate is that you can just ignore egregious instructions like that and they won't do anything. That was crazy empowering.

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>>101118220
Lol

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>>101111510

The one where you are forced to listen spontaneous music at the evenings

>>101110308
jesus fuck, this pod shit reminds me the hostels I slept in when I was in Spain
FUCK, it wouldn't be total shit except there is always someone that is
a) retarded
b) deranged and dangerous
c) both of the above

In the future you will have a card that will say "regoular human" or "retarded human" the retards will have their own shops, hotels, fly class etc.

>>101119478
I wouldn't mind it if it cost less than just renting a normal apartment somewhere sane.

That's the weird thing about all this. Shitty housing is somehow more expensive in the US than normal housing.

>>101116837
Help an anon out, please

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>>101110308

Cannot believe how brutal the market is

I work with FPGAs and it used to be that you would be hired if you knew what an FPGA is and what is the difference between blocking and nonblocking statements

Now I'm being asked to do describe the results of synthesis and implementation down to individual LUTs and how they would be placed and guess the working frequency for entry level positions on top of getting rejected because I never worked with the exact specific bus protocol they use internally all while being tested with leetcode style questions in Verilog as screeners

It's kind of absurd

I should've just dropped out of school back in 2022 when the market was hot instead of listening to my parents and staying in school to wrap up my PhD

Now I'm just overeducated and have no useful skills

Might go back to school again to study nursing

>>101119037
been there done that

>>101119693
lol

>>101110308
SQUATTERS RIGHTS!

>>101119693
I got out of gateware ~5 years ago for a lot of the same reasons. Used to just be "read this VHDL and tell me what it does" or "why would you want to sync all reset lines across an architecture?" and then it became "describe how you would implement a latch such that it could not be read if the chip were decapped and placed under a SEM"

Went into software because there was far more demand, much better pay, and far easier interviews. But nowadays, no-name shit shops are putting people through 5+ round LeetCode hard wringers too. Real bummer.

>>101119778
this
revoke social security too

>>101119785
What's the deal with this? I always assumed jeets weren't smart enough to do low level stuff. Are koreans pushing everyone out of the industry/willing to work for pittances or something?

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>>101119037
just say the estimated time was wrong, ask for help (pass the issue to another dev) and back to coasting.

I should make a career as a coach

>>101119831
>I always assumed jeets weren't smart enough to do low level stuff
There are no silicon/ASIC/FPGA Jeets. It's mostly Chinese and white guys. It's just the raising of the tide for hiring across all sectors. There's too much opportunity cost flushed down the tubes if you hire a retard who's only tangible skill is interviewing well. Shame because it makes life for actual intelligent, industrious people 10x more difficult.

Which certification will get me a job that doesn't make me wanna die?

>>101119949
>certification
boat sailing

>>101119949
Get a sex having cert then you can bill hot women an hourly rate to fix their plumbing

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>>101113926
WOWOWWWWWWW SHE'S SO HOTTT UGHHHHHHHHHH


SEXOOOOOOOO

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>>101111355
What we need is a total and complete shutdown of GUIs and a return to console applications until can figure out what the hell is going on.

Seriously, most serious enterprise business applications require training and reading tons of documentation to use anyway. So instead of wasting all that time building shit GUIs we can build nice, small composable command line tools that can be piped together and automated, and instead teach the users shell scripting, which would be an actual transferable skill unlike the training they normally get.

But I'm starting to think the whole point is doing intentionally dysfunctional software so you can sell more training, dev and UX designer hours.

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>>101119785
>Went into software because there was far more demand, much better pay, and far easier interviews

Unfortunately I genuinely liked hardware and so I focused on it. My understanding is that software is as saturated as hardware if not more these days since everyone is studying CS. I would need years to reskill if I decided to go that route

Was reading Jim Keller's wikipedia the other day and laughed how he graduated with a BS and went on to work on designing CPUs right away, different times ...


>>101119927
>There are no silicon/ASIC/FPGA Jeets

I don't agree with this. Everyone in the US has been focusing on software leaving an opening for India to dominate. Look up any VLSI concept and you'll find that 90% of sources are written by jeets. If you go to any company's career page now you will find tons of positions for ASIC/FPGA stuff in India and like one or two in the US. Intel (even in the US) has so many indians working that my lab mate who's from india used to joke that their branding slogan should be "indian inside". At one of my internships we also had a team of contractors from India doing verification.

I'm also feeling like they discriminate and just hire each other ngl. I cannot even get any semicons to acknowledge me, yet international students who I know have been caught cheating are now working full time at places like Intel, AMD and Marvell

>>101116226
I tried the podlife for one night at Zürich airport. It wouldn't have been as bad for the odd night if it was properly cooled, which really shouldn't be a hard problem to solve.

Quesiton for unemployed anons:

How much of your day do you spend job searching / applying / CV tweaking / LinkedIn posting versus working on your project portfolio / learning new things / taking certs?
I struggle with keeping a balance, because on the one hand I need to get hired and on the other I need to keep making myself more attractive to recruiters to get hired

>>101120458
9 hours gooning
3 hours quick applying on indeed
12 hours sleeping

>>101120458
Not unemployed now, but when I was I did jack shit because I have an agent. All I did was go to the interviews when told to.

It's not a free lunch of course, because the agency takes a cut, and I only get boring one-size-fits-all jobs.

The fuck is the point of a cover letter?
Why do I have to beg for a fucking job?

>>101120620
A show of submission is important so they know you're susceptible to getting screwed

>>101120620
because theres not nerely enough of these fake and gay jobs to go around for everyone so they can do whatever they want

Is it possible to work tech after 40?

I'm approaching that age and need to think about my next job of it's over at 40.

>>101120699
Yes, it is possible to pivot
But the job market sucks for everyone right now so

>>101120699
No
Every job is impossible after 40
Plan on jumping off a building when you turn 40

>>101120699
you're supposed to be a manager or similar by now

>>101120728
I'm an architect

>>101120746
now you're a software architect
boom

>>101120754
Yes that is what I mean obviously, not the building kind

>>101120746
you should be fine then, i'm an architect too and my next stop is management

>>101120746
why don't we build with marble pillars anymore?

>>101120620
They used to make sense back when every job had 10 or 15 applicants at most and you only had to apply to 10 or 15 jobs to get a full time offer. It would make you stand out.

In this new era of mass applying you should not write them. In the time it takes you to write just one decent letter you could apply to 5 other jobs, and the probably of getting any one job is so low that writing cover letters is a waste of time.

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eventually it will be literally impossible to get a non-minimum-wage job without a reference

>>101120699
you mean with previos tech exp or without?

>>101115199
I mean, you have to start somewhere. You sound like a retard. It goes user error > simple hardware > on prem org management > networking > virtualization > cloud shit

>Why would anyone work help desk?

It's how you start... Duh

>>101121230
I have literally never seen anyone from those teams move into software engineering or data science or anything coding related though

Where I work at just went through a merger and they claim repeatedly that they're not letting anyone go - when should I start looking for a new gig?

>>101110308
Why do they live in a concentration camp

How do you guys spend your free time? I need fun things to do after work but have no friends.

>>101121504
Chores and video games are enough to fill all my free time.

>>101121504
Reach out online to start an escape room team, then go around and do those
Join a gym and get stronger
Don't order takeout slop and learn to cook
Play videogames in your backlog (everyone has one).

>>101121504
i need a job

>>101119693
Think the problem with that is that the market for FPGAs is limited (defense, the highest and tiniest echelon of finance, and some weird random image processing uses) and the surge of CS students who learned a thing or two about it means supply is way greater than demand, and by supply I mean a guy with a bachelors in CS who took one class about circuit design and FPGAs and made his resume look like he's an expert in them.

>>101120620
honestly, who gives a fuck anymore? Just put in your job experience copypasta into chatGPT and ask him to write you one.

My gf recently lost her job (barista, only high school degree). We applied for a LIBRARIAN role. They wanted us to complete THIRTEEN variations of 'why you want to work for us / what would the challenges of the role be / etc'. For a barely above minimum wage as a fucking librarian assistant. Even with chatGPT it took me like 15 mins to copy paste all those responses.

>>101121705
hope your gf enjoys watching homeless people masturbate

>>101121504
I sit in my bedroom lonely and depressed

>>101120620
It's completely pointless. Just write a generic one if you think it helps. They won't read it anyway.

>>101120699
Grow a beard and become a sysadmin for some random high school

>>101121990
are you hiring?

>>101121571
>and by supply I mean a guy with a bachelors in CS who took one class about circuit design and FPGAs and made his resume look like he's an expert in them

So are you saying that I'm getting lost in the noise or that I'm being passed for guys who fake it until they make it? All of my PhD work is using FPGAs and I have 3 FPGA internships under my belt (2 of which are at a trading firm)

I thought given this I would be able to secure some kind of hardware job, but I am getting reality checked hard. Defense contractors were my "safety" but even applying there I get ghosted

>>101122084
No offense but if I saw an application from a PhD I'd think "nah that sounds annoying to deal with"

>>101122084
Both, it's simply a bad market. More good applicants looking for jobs and more bad applicants chat-gpting and wasting time. And you chose a specialized field, so it's even harder.
But don't lose hope. I was unemployed for 6 months, getting rejected by shit companies even though I consider myself a top tier applicant, even posted my resume here and got told it was great. But eventually I received 2 offers at once, and one from an amazing industry I thought I'd never get into and paying a shit ton. If you're actually a good applicant, it will always work out eventually.

>>101121504
if you have to ask it's already over

>>101122169
What did you do during the 6 months?

>spend a year in hell desk
>sick of it
>look for more jobs
>LOL YOU NEED 3 YEARS AND YOU GET PAID PAID LESS THAN YOU DO NOW HAHAHA

>>101122169
Do you think having fake experience in my resume is hurting my odds?

>>101122248
Are you a bad liar? I read a resume from a girl earlier this year that claimed she "increased manufacturing efficiency by 200%" in her fucking internship.

>>101122269
I said I'm working on a company that isn't real, only for 8 months tho, the 8 months I have been looking for a job so far.

>>101122285
My name is Nancy. Becky gives me all of the resumes that get through ATS and the first round of reviews. My job is to spot check their work history. If I can't find an employer on google the resume goes into the trash. If the resume gives me the ick it goes in the trash.

>>101122321
Am I supposed to just state I have 0 years of experience and waste 8 months searching for work?

>>101122342
Yes

>>101122342
Does your dad or any of your friends from school or church have any local businesses that they could pretend to have employed you at?

>>101122224
Played videogames 10 hours a day, became insanely depressed, scrolled mindlessly through jobs for hours a day and did interviews as they came in.

>>101122248
They can verify whether you worked somewhere and the approximate months you did work at that place. Not much more. If you're bullshitting what you did at a previous job and you're sounding like you know your shit, there is next to 0 chance of your lies being discovered.

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I don’t want to go back to work tomorrow

>>101122358
Then what do I do?

>>101122400
Fuck you.

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>>101122400
work hard goyim or you won't be able to pay the rent!

>>101122381
Did they ask you about your 6 months?

>>101122443
Yeah as well as why I left my last job, just said I was laid off and began searching about 2 months ago after a sabbatical (bullshit) and that was the last I ever heard of it. I doubt they would've cared if I told them the truth of how bad my job search was.

>hurr durr dont quit until you have a new job lined up but also don't let your current employer know you're looking haha
HOW AM I MEANT TO INTERVIEW WHEN I'M AT WORK EVERYDAY

>>101122483
oops you caught covid :(

>>101122491
Yeah that'll work once
What about the next time?

>>101122510
literally just take a vacation day then. why is this difficult?

>>101122528
not a thing in my country

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>>101122528
>vacation day

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>>101122598
>>101122599
you're telling me you can't just take a day off if you feel like it?

>>101122617
let's just say my country is known for having literal slaves, so law isn't really a concern to my employer

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>>101122625
we will be told what your country is. you will comply.

>>101114745
Based. Terry approves
https://m.youtube.com/watch?v=4UfpfKVOX08

>>101122400
me neither bro, me neither. normally, I would quit and take several months off, but I am not gonna risk it in this job market. america needs to start printing cheap money again.

>>101117932
troon out dumbass

>>101122915
I wonder if a single person has trooned out solely to get a job. It's like the ultimate litmus test, you just can't fake it.

>>101122934
https://nypost.com/2024/03/06/world-news/spanish-soldiers-changing-gender-to-female-for-added-benefits/

>>101122934
>>101122934
I'm considering it but I'm kinda fruity and femboyish in the first place so it's not a huge stretch.

I also hate women so taking an undeserved job from them is a plus.

>>101117295
>cd my-repo
>rm -rf .git/
>git init
>git commit -m 'init'

dumbass

>>101110308
> light up logo macbook
wow, how old is this photo? light up logos were phased out over 10 years ago I think

>>101120923
it's going to get to truly third world levels where even a reference won't get you in and you need to start bribing your way through every single stage of the interview

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>>101123268
oh god is that a thing
please let me die before i have to job hunt again

>>101120923
>>101123268
getting a reference is as easy as hitting someone up on linkedin to refer you. most will help you, especially if the company has referral bonuses. it's that easy.

>>101123348
>hello saar i am prandesh! i will be needful the reference SIR!

How do you tell non-Asian girls that you work in tech without their vaginas drying up?

>>101124225
"i have a remote job"
(i have never had sex i just imagine that's what i'd say)

what are the least saturated fields?

>>101124380
Nothing

Been at my current job for almost 2 years now and have just barely been coasting by. I don’t know how to code and use ChatGPT to get any coding work done. How can I force myself to learn shit outside of work so I can become more competent? I’m tired of feeling like a retard (although I am one).

>>101124495
do you like programming? if you did you'd probably already know, if not then whatever just keep faking it

Junior here. Been working for a month. First job in the field. First days were the hardest ones because i had a fuckton of files in my screen and had to get an idea what the fuck they were doing. because it's an ongoing project with at least 1 year of progress.

Not that its super easy, but at least whatever i'm learning everyday is redirected with more ease to what i need to deliver. Also getting more used to the project stack and i'm able to do the tasks in less time.

Anyways, any tips on progress? I'm starting to work in a personal project on the side not to get too fixated on my job and still learn other stuff.

>>101124582
take adderall to get ahead, control your dosage, quit before you're 30

>>101114745
is it really fraud if you are able to handle 2 full time jobs at the same time? like if your performance is satisfactory at both jobs, what's the problem?

>>101124609
Bit overkill, isn't it? I'm still young.
I'm just taking caffeine with l-teanine and taurine on the mornings cuz its hard to wake up. Weekends i don't take nothing aside from a joint or two so i reset my mind.
Aside from that, yeah, don't plan on working all my life to be honest. Just wanna save up a decent amount and live like a NEET/Hikki like i did for 5 years straight. Or get a rush, do something big (locally) and reap a huge amount for my whole life. Am i dreaming too much at this point? lol.

>>101124648
take adderall or you'll burn out. you WILL suck the cock until you get to senior yourself at which point stop putting effort in.
you can't take breaks between working, karen won't let you, if you're planning to retire early then join the club, watch your savings inflate away to nothing

>>101124661
Never took Adderal, just Vyvanse a few times. I remember reading thousands of pages in a day like nothing else existed. Don't wanna hole myself on work like that, but still don't wanna suck cock.

>>101124676
>don't wanna suck cock
one bad roll of the dice and you're back to job hunting with the other deranged neets itt. think you can manage 30 applications a day? get on your knees, junior, i have a powerpoint for you to make.

>>101124700
Kek, fuck off, baby boy.

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>>101124716
see you at your performance review, junior. ever heard of a PIP?

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>>101124729
Y-Yes?

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>>101124748
you'll be one one pronto if you don't have that powerpoint ready by COB

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>>101111355
seems like you haven't worked with thoughtful designers – i blame weak hiring criteria at the organisations you've been at.

modern ux (and by extension ui) is effective when it abstracts away unnecessary complexity. a well designed tool is one that is accessible AND efficient. how often do you write using machine language, or even assembly?

re: "drop shadows or rounded corner or animations". i say with certainty that anything is more compelling when beauty is just as much a consideration as utility. you could make a baby all the same with a 3/10 and a 10/10 – i guarantee you will enjoy fucking the 10/10 more

>another monday approaches
i LITERALLY cannot cope

>>101110308
this literally how nigger slaves used to be treated by the way.

>>101125205
>seems like you haven't worked with thoughtful designers

Nearly every modern UI/UX is a shitshow.

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>my performance review for "showing passion in the workplace" was "Not Demonstrated"

>>101125737
>showing passion in the workplace
what the hell does that mean?

>>101125484
the phone you're posting this from uses software that was designed by a team of ux/ui professionals.

if the user experience was "a shitshow" you would not be picking up your device to browse 4chan, type out a reply and post it. if there was so much friction to the point that it was inconvenient, you would not do it. you, the user, are having a functional experience.

now apply this anecdote to as many other tasks and software tools you encounter in your daily life. how many have so much friction that you just give up?

if you are able to get something done but had a shit time doing it, that's the fault of corporate incentives and not "the entire field of ux design". (read: minimum viable product)

>>101125791
nta but doing the walmart dance i guess

>>101122915
Why would I do that? It's obviously not worth it

>>101110308
how the fuck do you even fart in this thing?
and let's not talk about masturbating or, god forbid, having sex... though I guess leftist males don't really have that much sex

>no Mark I'm not doing oncalls, hire a consultant in a different time zone region you idiot
How to express the same but politely? I've always been bad at wording.

>>101122934
I would do it if I could get an asylum and move to a first world country, no joke.

Someone once shared a website with examples of technical interviews, I didn't save it. Anyone knows which one I'm talking about.
Any other legit website is welcome though.

>>101110308
i stayed in one of these
no way your using a laptop in them
barely a phone and even then

>>101111279
that looks like something dogs would be kept in, like in a pound wtf

>>101126450
guys?

>>101126219
>how the fuck do you even fart in this thing?
You leave? Either go outside or to a bathroom.
>and let's not talk about masturbating or, god forbid, having sex
Again, just go somewhere else.

>>101126990
What public place is there for masturbating? Can't think of anything

>get a bonus and RSUs same month
>taxation on RSUs is even higher than my bonus
I feel like I am scammed

>>101127012
your local elementary school

>>101128028
But seriously though? By public I mean something that isn't your home obviously. A hotel?

>Nearly two months into WGU degree
>Only finished 5/17 courses
>Haven't gotten to the difficult stuff yet
>Going to be busy in September
bros... I may have to do more than one term

>>101121504
>Feel anxious about work the next day
>Play videogames and question if I'm enjoying them
>Think about life (excessively)
>Go to bed late wondering where the time went

>>101128093
Just pay a couple bucks to homeless people for a bj in a back alley like normal people do

I hate setting goals. I have no idea how to do this bullshit

I am already one of the best devs in team, can't I just write "continue as usual"

>>101128183
No, scrum lords and/or management need to justify their jobs

IT'S MONDAY!

>>101129240
blue monday

God I fucking hate the IT nerds in my workplace. I am sorry you have to work helpdesk but please consider quitting if you're not going to do your job.

My team transitioned the company from on prem to cloud, then did handover of AD/Entra to IT, who then outsourced the whole helpdesk to India.

Ofc the contractors then fucked everything up beyond belief and now aren't allowed to make any actual changes without the approval of the 'Global Head of IT' who takes weeks to respond

Machine running like dogshit because of all the company bloatware that can't be disabled? Remote wipe of your machine, ticket closed

Need a new user added to AD groups? Two week wait and four levels of approval from people who don't even know what the groups are for. Ticket never get's approved or closed.

Need admin rights to update a program on your shitty laptop? Don't even bother, ticket closed and reported to HR for malicious computer use

One of my coworkers were reported because IT remoted to his machine and found he had a terminal open. We are a software company.

How easily transferable are data scientist/ML engineer skills to the quant finance meme?

>>101126219
When I lived with my I would just go to the state park.

>>101129334
>Outsourcing AD admin
>Not allowing managers to manage their own groups
What kind of retard runs a company this way?

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it begins

>Sprint retro that lasts 2 hours and is just dumb post-it shit
Humiliation ritual

>>101123369
yeah, if you're brown, I'll just ignore you, obviously

>apply for a job I'm qualified for
>they send me a lower level position that pays less
Haha no.

>>101130101
They actually get back to you about a different position? Lucky.

>>101130163
It's a temporary part time position that pays less than what I'm doing right now

>Monday
Another fucking monday

>applied to FAGMAN
>still in the pipeline
Huh, it faster last time.

>>101130406
>FAGMAN
what do the two As stand for? i know one is apple, but what's the other?

>>101130478
Amazon

>>101130478
Facebook, Apple, Google, Meta, Amazon, Netflix

Ignore the double

>>101130495
>Meta
That's just Facebook
The M in FAGMAN is Microsoft

>>101130500
>>101130495
I thought the M was for Musk?

>>101130311
Is someone having a bad case of monday??? :^)

Anyone else seeing an uptick in jobs with delusional requirements?

>just have 5 years as a fe dev
>and a ui/ux expert
>with a degree in graphic design

>we need you to handle the whole product cycle, from gathering requirements to deployment
>and it would be nice if you had maths degree or a finance background

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What's a good tech-adjacent job? I'm half-decent with a computer but also half-decent with a soldering iron or cable crimper, but structured cabling requires a separate 9000 years of guild accreditation parchments and there's no market for fix-it guys anymore (I already tried it and got exactly one(1) gig, which was a pity job I did for free(and it turned out to be LITERALLY nothing, guy asked me to repair a laptop but it ended up not having anything actually wrong with it, i still dk why he gave it to me))

>>101129541
never worked anywhere that does that, but it's a common offering from MSPs. Bigger places will also tend to centralize their IT so even if it's not outsourced to pajeets, your IT department is some nebulous semi-autonomous entity that doesn't give a fuck about the core business anymore

>>101129334
>One of my coworkers were reported because IT remoted to his machine and found he had a terminal open. We are a software company.
i will die mad that this one actually happened to me too, though not at a software company.

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>>101131027
I've posted this before but never hurts to have a refresher:


>2008
>senior software engineer expectations: expert in 1 language, able to write code, able to speak coherently
>pay: inflation adjusted 250k+/year

>2024
>senior software engineer expectations: compiler theory, machine learning, linear algebra, calculus, operating system kernel devleopment, cloud knowledge, networking knowledge, expertise in multiple languages and ecosystems, ability to autofelate, ability to give technical talks and translate business requirements to technical tasks, ability to hold the hand of fresh grads and Jeets (aka perpetual fresh grads), distributed system design, GPU acceleration
>pay: $90k/year (with a 2% 401k match! ...vested after 5 years at the company)

This is not hyperbole. Go watch Dave Plummer (retired Microsoft gazillionaire) -- literally all the guy did was write Task Manager which is unironically on par with the average difficulty of a take-home test to _even consider being hired_ in Anno Domini 2024.

What the fuck happened?

>>101131027
I've seen level one hell desk jobs require 5 yoe

>>101131027
>>101131053
it was OK a few months ago but got bad again. honestly it's not as bad as it was about a year ago, but the pendulum is swinging

>what the fuck happene
too many code campers/"learn to code" memers/etc have flooded the market
technology is mostly stable despite techbro "disruption" but employers demand InNoVaToRs who will make them the next unicorn product
greedy CEOs
HR rats with no understanding of what they're hiring for

it's happening in other fields, too. used to be all it took to be a tradie was to know righty-tighty-lefty-loosy but to even be an interior painter now you need all kinds of certifications and 10 yoe and your own truck full of tools and shit. may as well just freelance on kijiji (which is what you see more of now since getting hired as a tradie is getting to be as impossible as in IT)

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>>101130705
you…think this is funny???

>>101131053
>This is not hyperbole. Go watch Dave Plummer (retired Microsoft gazillionaire) -- literally all the guy did was write Task Manager which is unironically on par with the average difficulty of a take-home test to _even consider being hired_ in Anno Domini 2024.
Holy shit. I interviewed at Intel in late 2019 and my take-home was literally writing Task Manager but for Linux. Walk /proc/<pid>/* and put all the stats into a Qt UI. Got ghosted after I submitted by (fully functional) work.

>>101110308
> expected salary
The fuck is this wall of text?
> they ask you for salary expectations
> but you refuse to guess
How is this supposed to work? You just don't answer?

>>101131027
Mechanical in tech, we're expected to have 5+ yoe and know how to use ANSYS or obscure software. Hardly anyone has access to ANSYS or any of those software packages because it costs an arm and a leg to get a seat for them. All for a relatively entry level job starting as low as $60k in a HCOL city. It's ridiculous.

>>101110308
I've seen this a million times but it's unironically worse looking than a hostel I slept in when I first moved to my current city. At least the hostel had proper furniture

>>101119693
>>101119785
what's wild is the companies doing this now make phones that explode in your pocket

>>101131144
i've seen employers demand IBM Watson experience. shit is nuts

>>101110308
There's this fuckboy zoomer who looks like he spends 1hr each morning doing all sorts of stuff to his face and hair for a fucking teams meeting with other devs. It's actually annoying because he does this dumb eye squint thing like he's giving everyone fuck me eyes and sucks in his cheeks. I mean he's clearly 9/10 but why the unnecessary flex? 5 of us are bald/balding, everyone is basically in their home clothes but he's dressed for a night out with something new and stylish every day. Today he came on with a white vest but for someone reason has jewellery on as if he's some gang banging Mexican. Why? The only women on our team are way older than him and aren't anywhere near him in looks, and they live several states away. It's not going to get him laid.
Even when he's in a technical meeting with senior devs he puts on a romantic voice. It doesn't make me uncomfortable, I'm just very confused. I get doing that with girls you could fuck but there's no benefit here.
Did social media make all zoomers metrosexuals who constantly try to look their best?

>>101131213
he wants that big boomer daddy D anon

>>101131160
Isn't IBM Watson a fucking joke? I also know of one of the grifters that worked on their teams. Says she works in tech but has zero working experience and only "managed" teams and now just does talks about women in tech.

>>101131213
TikTok has internalized to zoomers that they are being pbserved and judged 24/7 by potential mates and even one small slip up means perma-ick pussy free life. I feel bad for them desu.

>>101131230
>Isn't IBM Watson a fucking joke?
partially. it started as the jeopardy bot but was briefly the name of an i believe now defunct cloud computing platform/service

>>101131213
metrosexual and homosexual

is there any point of working in web development anymore? actually: is there any point of working AT ALL? it's such a saturated market nowadays. I feel like before the pandemic it was much easier to be at a job where you could be creative and have some sort of independence, but nowadays I feel like I'm in that "Modern Times" movie, instead of working on a whole project (or at least being able to contribute in a much more significant scale on the existing ones) I'm just another code monkey finishing tickets. I feel so alienated, I can't keep a job with that low level of intellectual stimulation. I feel like it's just a matter of time before I take prescription drugs and turn off my brain a little bit just enough to not be bothered by this and go back the job market.

I feel like an artisan from the middle ages complaining about the industrial revolution, how can I escape the whole Agile/JIRA/tickets hellscape? i don't mind learning whatever it takes to escape this. it's either this, or I quit programming for good

>>101131247
You're right. I forgot it was a jeopardy bot. Oh how the mighty have fallen.

>>101131287
>actually: is there any point of working AT ALL?
no

>>101131027
>>101131053
>>101131144
surely this isn't sustainable bros. when will the market return favor engineers?

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>>101131223
He doesn't seem gay, he looks/behaves like he's trying to smash some girl at a party. Maybe his girlfriend is in the room with him and she dresses him up for work? That'd explain the very obvious "I'm horny" voice. Yh not sure what he's doing but he doesn't seem gay.
>>101131232
I guess they're in survival mode then. It's still pretty weird that he keeps pulling faces like pic related for 1hr straight in some meetings even when he doesn't have to talk, the entire engineering team is present, it's being recorded and 90+% of cameras are off. He's still there trying to mogg everyone to oblivion like his life depends on it. He once wore some skin tight gym fit that looked like he had padded fake muscles underneath, he wasn't jacked but either crackhead lean from the looks of it or wearing something literally skin tight. His camera angle was different and he was flexing different positions to make himself look as ripped as possible whilst maintaining the lover boy face.
Its almost zoolander ridiculous but he's actually model tier good looking so I guess he did modelling recently and picked up some weird habits.

>>101131287
>is there any point of working AT ALL?
stopped reading here, you'll find out when you start having to pay rent, dumb zoomer

>>101131328
yes, it was rhetorical question. of course there is no point, but we still need to eat

tl;dr: is there any quick, palliative alternative to the Agile/JIRA/ticketing hellscape before I consider to off myself?

>>101131363
become a tradie

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I've spent the last 5 years working for the most insufferable cunts on the planet and I have no desire to go back. I'd rather cash in my autism chips by claiming disability than to ever sit in another gay stand-up meeting ever again.

>>101131344
you seem gay for caring so much about this man

>>101131360
Low IQ individuals always assume that by describing reality it necessarily means that i'm endorsing or opposing it. you always take it personally lol

>>101131344
nah that sounds like unironic homo behaviour to me. i've never met a straight man that has those sorts of mannerisms even when trying to get pussy in the most nornie of nightclubs. especially the "cheeks sucked in" thing

>>101131372
There are decent (even good) workplaces out there though anon.
Might take a few months, but you can find one.

>>101129502
kek

>>101131360
I literally quit software engineering 7 months ago and started sports betting, lmao. why are you all so dumb? it is a problem that is affecting everyone in the field, I'm talking about it and somehow you're taking it personally. you're no different from women

>>101131381
God I fucking hate this. Women in particular seem to do this, it's why I've given up on talking to them about anything other than sex.

>>101131344
>>101131232
inb4 looksmaxxing memes and memetic standards inflation actually render 90% of men unfuckable

>>101131287
It's gone the opposite direction for me. I have way more independence now than I did during the pandemic.

>>101131213
Apparently they act this way with robots now too. Something happened with zoomers, I think it was the way they did sex ed.

>>101131213
Why dont you stop being fat and ugly

>>101131508
>Why dont you stop being fat and ugly
nta but it's currently 2:32am and I'm looking into how I can make a low calorie, high protein pizza

>>101131508
still nta but I should also mention how great I feel after introducing red meat into my calorie deficit diet.

thinking about taking a bunch of acid to induce a mental break and afking from reality

>>101131601
that honestly sounds worse than staying grounded in reality, no matter how shitty it gets. handling the hand you've been dealt an and all. i will never take psychedelics, heard too many horror stories about people losing themselves permanently.

hypothetically, if the burdens that someone's life throws at them are too much to dealt with, i feel that death would be better to whatever horrors you would experience after destroying your brain with psychedelics. at that point you'd be in uncharted territory

>>101131674
becoming an hero is also an option

>>101131380
I had to see his face on the screen for 2 hours today, he's in perfect lighting and wearing something new everyday so it's the elephant in the room. Most weeks I see his face there for 5 hrs of my work week. It's just weird and cartoonishly funny.
>>101131389
My younger cousins mentioned mewing and looksmaxxing along with blackpill tier topics you'd have only seen on puahate a decade ago. Just casually talking about gonial angles and epicanthal tilts in front of their parents like it's nothing. Tiktok has done irreparable damage to that generation lmao
>>101131436
I doubt it's actually why they're not getting laid. Most of these guys aren't actually socially interacting with eachother let alone the other gender. Sure it's not like how it was back in the 50s, the competition has improved, the dating pool is much larger and the Internet has skewed things a bit but the guys who have no friends shouldn't blame their dating issues on women's standards if they don't even have 3 friends they regularly hang out with.
>>101131482
I guess the majority of the guys have been longhoused lol
>>101131508
Im decent looking myself, I just don't slickback my hair, wear a Cuban chain and hunting visors for stand up. Sometimes it's like he's larping as a different /tv/ character everytime he changes his outfits. He might be autistic or just thinks of it as his way of trolling but I'll admit that it's working. The witty principle dev basically stuttered in confusion after the guy spoke up during a CoP meeting he was leading, which never happens. 20% of the people on every call are visibly confused by him or smiling from holding in their laugh.
I hope it's a very long act he's pulling and he's not actually like this for his own sake.

>>101131696
Just go outside and live like a homeless person. You can take your laptop with you.
Katzinski (or however you right his name) is absolutely right: Having to deal with daily survival problems makes you way more happy and focused.

>>101131344
>>101131749
didn't read your whole story but why are you even using your cameras in meetings and having to see his face for hours? wtf?
is this a LARP or something?

>>101131749
>Sometimes it's like he's larping as a different /tv/ character everytime he changes his outfits.
Metrosexual + instagram brain. Not isolated to zoomers btw, many millennials and even some gen x and boomers like this at my office. Always buying new clothes, showing off outfits, etc. I don't hate them for it, it probably gets them pussy

>>101131802
>it probably gets them pussy
desu I doubt it does.
What actually gets you pussy is minimally taking care of yourself (hygiene and dressing decently, don't go over the top) and actually talking to women. Usually people who do this are terminally online instead and trying to compensate.

>>101131213
>Why?
I'm guessing a sense of professionalism. Slightly misplaced because he's wearing the wrong clothes for work. One should definitely dress well when on a video call or when you have to be in person.

>>101131601
I've been meaning to do acid all year, but I keep finding a reason not to do it. There's always something else I'd rather be doing than being completely fucked up for 12 hours. One by one, I'm gradually running out of excuses and I'm getting closer and closer to marathoning Star Trek: The Next Generation while locked into a kaleidoscopic nightmare. I'd be screaming an agonized neon fury at Warp 10, a speed which was once merely theoretical until I swallowed 3 tabs of highly potent blotter acid. Locked into a fetal position surrounded by a personal hell of my own design, I'd boldly go where no man has gone before and that's deep beneath the recesses of my own fragmented mind, reliving memories of childhood torment, seeing faces of people who have long since gone, experiencing humiliation I had long since forgotten. I turn my head to the TV screen to find solace and see the twisted visage of what was once Captain Picard's face. The Enterprise is my mind, and I am the captain. What would Picard do if he found himself naked at 3 in the morning, surrounded by pizza boxes, cans of coke and a head full of acid? I break free of the rigor mortis that has gripped my body and I pull myself off the carpet. Much like Jesus Christ rose from the dead, I rise to my feet, I've become resurrected. I am now ready to face the Klingons in my brain man to man. They've broken the laws of The Federation; they will not escape justice. Engage!

>>101131749
obsessed

NEW
>>101132032
>>101132032
>>101132032

>>101131993
I tried it in college and my vision never really went back to normal. I still see static when I look at the sky.

>>101132037
stop putting retarded grifter jeet links in the op

>>101132093
none of them are grifters. its all free

>>101132142
all of the channels linked have ads on them you smelly jeet

>>101131783
Manager wants us to see each other's faces more often since the team is fully remote now. He misses working in the office and getting to know everyone personally and thinks everyone is missing out. The company doesn't want to push people back into the office anytime soon since no one wants a new lease for an office in NYC, London, Hong Kong, etc. This is the compromise I guess. For small desk checks and testing no one does it 90% of the time but most people are pressured to turn it on for medium sized meetings where pops in.
>>101131802
We have one gen x dev who literally has one outfit but several pairs of the same thing. He's such a meme himself. Retarded rock climbing autist who's obsessed with being in some zone.
>>101132021
I think you too would eventually vent for a bit about the new hire staring at you like pic related for months. At least it's not the office. I did a quick background check on the kid
>don't worry I do this for basically everyone I ever have to interact with
He's 6ft 5 and was a 2 sport athlete. I'd rather have him haunt my peripheral vision for a few hours a week on teams than get mogged to the grave every day my some kid. Too bad the company is overwhelming male and all the women are old/ugly, he could've been the source for endless office drama if this had as many zoomer girls as my last job.
>even the back end was 30% female and 80% of the were under 30 thanks to super aggressive diversity hiring
I never got to see if they ever made a negative long term impact on the company since none of them stayed long enough to be senior devs, they just asked for help a lot which is better than suffering in silence I guess.

>>101132382
do you fantasize about sucking his dick?

>>101119478
>In the future you will have a card that will say "regoular human" or "retarded human"
Anon discovers social credit score.

>>101132382
>We have one gen x dev who literally has one outfit but several pairs of the same thing.
literally me, just millennial

>>101132382
>Manager wants us to see each other's faces more often since the team is fully remote now. He misses working in the office and getting to know everyone personally and thinks everyone is missing out.
AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA
imagine being this much of a cuck and letting a (micro)manager dictate that you NEED to have your camera on because he's lonely and probably a faggot as well.

>>101132982
I don't mind at all, nothing embarrassing to hide and I'm presentable even in my pyjamas. It's only for those scheduled meetings where you know everyone, if it's a small call with my team to code review some PR or desk check the work, no one turns it one even the serial facefag.
>>101132714
I found photos of him as far back as 2016 with the exact same outfit. I mentioned it once privately and he showed his wardrobe. Seemed like 6 pairs of the same shit. People this autistic are genuinely hilarious.

>>101133117
>It's only for those scheduled meetings where you know everyone
who the fuck has 4 hours long meetings?

>I found photos of him as far back as 2016 with the exact same outfit. I mentioned it once privately and he showed his wardrobe.
you should fuck him. you clearly want to.

>>101133227
>who the fuck has 4 hours long meetings?
45 minutes worth of code reviews and desk checks, 15 minute stand up, 90 minutes worth of CoPs, 1hr training hour presentation, 30 minute worth of refinement. Monday and Wednesday are meeting heavy but the rest of the days I have only stand up and maybe an hour of other miscellaneous stuff.