>>101465384
get them out of the country if they can't actually fucking code actual code and not fucking dogshit tbqhwy

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>>101465384
Wonder if this is related to why I couldn't fucking buy me alcohol at the bottle store lmao

Can confirm
At work and we use windows tablets to monitor CNC machines
Every one of them (~50) popped a BSOD about 2 hours ago

>>101465419
>windows tablets to monitor CNC machines
That's going to get someone killed.

>>101465419
ok but why?? i looked at xiter and it's true, but what's the source of this fuckery, is it azure or some botched update that had to be applied immediately?

https://www.abc.net.au/news/2024-07-19/global-it-outage-crowdstrike-microsoft-banks-airlines-australia/104119960
KEK
E
K

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I'm a security guard and all of the cameras shut down. Hope nobody steals anything because I'm blind lol.

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>>101465459
An operating system being rendered unusable because of network issues is fucking astounding

>>101465432
They're only for tracking uptime/downtime so they can't hurt anyone, but the actual controllers run windows too so it's already joever.
>>101465442
I couldn't even hazard a guess.

>>101465410
I was lucky and bought mine about 4 hours ago.

>>101465470
Even our landline phones are down. I had to use a cell phone to call my supervisor.

>>101465459
Who designed this shit?
Why would network problems basically shut your entire OS down? Is this the future they envision?

>>101465442
>ok but why??
SAAR GOOD MORNING PLEASE DO THE NEEDFULS AND MERGE THIS WINDOWS UPDATE PR, PERFECT FOR GORGEOUS LOOKS

>>101465520
Kek I hightailed it home from the supermarket after being told shit's down so I can avoid the screaming outraged boomers in both the store and on the roads

>>101465384
>UHM WINDOWS ISNT BACKDOORED YOU GUYS, ITS COMPLETELY SAFE

>meme cloud antivirus service
Served them right.

t. Uses kaspersky

>>101465442
Probably cloud related by the looks of it. Is it affecting Windows 11 machines specifically?

This is cyber war we must strike back at Russia anons

This is big all hands on deck , we need to hack Russia

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>>101465547
It's actually "Iran".

>air control
>security guards
What other fun fields are having BSOD?

Azure and M365 support here (no, not a sir, sir) and all the building is down and half the city is offline.

Olympics are going to be very fun.

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>>101465384
ZE CYBERPANDEMIC
YOU VILL BUY ZE AI PC
>>101465419
>>101465459
wtf this cannot be real
>>101465556
false flag confirmed

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> whole networks and systems down worldwide
> 4chan keeps chugging along
WE'RE SO BACK

Who even use Windows as front end?
I was thought most servers are Ubuntu

Going by the comments it looks like the kind of machines that failed are the kind of machines where you'd install LTSC IoT. It would be funny if they pushed an intentionally botched update to annoy desktop users who are using LTSC instead of retail, but they're so incompetent that they ended up affecting legitimate customers.

>>101465590
Troonix are liars

So what do you do if you're stuck in a boot loop and use Bitlocker? Are those people just fucking dead?

>>101465587
4chan runs on mac minis so obviously we're not affected

>Ze assassin missed?
>Activate protocol cyber pandemique

>>101465612
god i wish

>>101465612
Find BitLocker key to enable safe mode and rename the offending folder, if you can't do that then...
Reimage
It's so fucked lmao

>>101465590
Doesn't matter if every other computer on the network is running windows. Effectively, you have crippled the network and people can get anything done.

>>101465640
>>101465612
so....is there an actual reason to use bitlocker, ever?

>>101465384
Thankfully I don't have crowdstrike on my PC

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Is this why I couldn't order my goyslop?

>>101465678
Assuming it's never cracked (lol) it's a good tool to stop data from leaking out of stolen company laptops.

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What the fuck

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>>101465448
So it's not a windows issue but a botched CrowdStrike update

>>101465748
Man I dread the day I'm capable as a developer to make global headlines because of my stupid ass breaking something

>>101465689
When it's back up can you get me a 1.25L of Kirk's Pasito and honey baked ham Kettle chips?

>>101465459
Freddy's gonna get you now

>>101465748
>chad crowdstrike just deploying globally
>beta fagman using canaries like a sissy
baste
i'm glad these "people" are kept in their microshaft pen instead of shitting up loonix with their mumbai#1 kernel driver task force

>>101465621
brilliant

So are Windows admins able to delete/rename the offending file remotely?

>>101465957
Have you tried entering safemode remotely without some form of out of band management? lol

>>101465972
Nope, I've never even used Active Directory. Not a sysadmin

>>101465957
Workaround seems to be to boot into safe mode and rename the CrowdStrike driver file to anything else so that it wouldn't load on boot.

But that's still major considering every affected machine needs this done manually

>>101465384
>>101465419
kek, so this is why our m-banking system were getting fucked.

>>101465996
Lets just say for those machines that are stuck in a boot loop you are either going to have a very annoying call with a end user who has no idea how to use a computer beyond word processing and facebook or have the machine returned to you.

our m-banking and bank-vision system are currently offline and theres like 400 tickets on queue
not my problem though kek

Salle with the schedule displays of my city's public transport system. All crashed.

>>101465957
>>101465972
>>101466015
so that's it? this is the real Y2K? no recovering and no functioning for days and weeks?

>"massive technical disruption"
>--------
>how BER wants to reduce waiting times with [typical German] "high tech"
Funny to me.
Reminder that Germany does the right thing for wrong reasons in trying to jail tranny security researchers.

>>101466057
I mean... it CAN be fixed. Just going to take a lot of man hours. Can't really be automated.

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>>101465621
heh

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>>101466067
whoops

>>101465543
>Inb4 some anon post the number of vulnerabilities in Debian vs Windows 11

>Family comes to me to back up all of their documents "just in case" because I use Linux
lmao, it was kinda funny. Still, what the fuck is happening?

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>>101465384
already fixed. get to work wagies

>>101465782
Sounds easy enough to avoid that, Just don't work for glowing global rootkit corporations

>>101465748
>crowdstrike threads pop up left and right on /g/ for the past week out of nowhere
>suddenly global outage caused by crowdstrike
this can't be a coincidence
I refuse to believe it

>>101466105
nope, still down here 500tickets on q and counting

>>101465384
I work for a major government agency in my country, the crowdstrike mistake has actively caused millions of damage to our system indirectly as this happened right as we were doing something extremely delicate and with out any exaggeration, i can say people have been killed because of this mistake due to the nature of my agency.

There is talk of a class action right now to sue the shit out of microsoft and crowdstrike as other government agencies have also been hit hard. Even regardless of the deaths this has caused, this has already caused damaged that will take months to clean up and without giving too much away about my job, hundreds of criminals will walk away scott free because of this due to a back up gone wrong.

My agency is out for blood and i hope they get it because the amount of over time i personally will have to do in the coming weeks now will be insane.

do the sneedful sars

>>101466126
that's why i said get to work saar.

>>101466148
not my problem

>>101466129
I hope this isn't a larp, let's go.

>>101466015
But does a Windows box have to boot cleanly to pickup InTine policy updates? That is so fucked if you manually have to do each one

>>101466129
What country?

>>101466203
wakanda

>>101466105
it got fixed almost immediately
the issue is that it requires manual intervention of every system that was affected
its going to take days

>>101466203
>it no longer exists...

>>101466203
Australia.
>>101466196
not a larp, but also no idea how serious the higher ups are taking this as it is a friday afternoon, but there are talks of completely boycotting windows all together. our largest program is still run with msDOS for some retarded reason.

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HAHHAHAHAHHAHA
GET ME OUT HAHAHHAHAHHAHA

>>101466225
So you guys think the crowdstrike bug IS the payload or are they trying to get into a system after everyone boots with it off?

>work systems down
>osrs still works
based

>>101465384
I sincerely hope that this hasn't destroyed where I work. I doubt anyone knows where we keep our emergency paperwork anymore.

From what I understand the following things at work run modern enough versions of windows to be potentially affected.

> Machine vision QA scanners
> X ray machines
> Some of our forklifts are testing a Windows-based control system that forces people to use periodic biometric authentication to operate.
> The inventory system itself
> Producton tracking
> A subset of RF guns
> Intercom system

I am willing to bet that the best case scenario where I work is we will have lost a week of production. Worst case I walk in tomorrow and we will either be shut down, have lost millions of dollars in product, and/or have people fucking dead due to machine/forklift incidents or radiation exposure.

>>101466277
SAAAR DO THE NEEDFUL AND FIX COMPUTER SAAAAAR PLEAS

>>101465384
>using Currysoft Windia in the year of our Lord 2024
you specifically asked for this

>>101466277
lmao you're saying you have no instant innawoods plan??

>>101466247
>Australia
I believe it.
>but there are talks of completely boycotting windows all together. our largest program is still run with msDOS for some retarded reason.
Oh lord this will be a good day.

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companies use windows for mission critical systems?

is microsoft at least contractually liable for downtime since the companies obviously have to pay to use their services?

>Situation has fucked banks and governments
It's ogre.

>>101466247
>Australia
If you're going past the milk bar can you pick me up an iced coffee and a pack of darts?

>>101466129
>>101466247
How is it a Windows issue if it's because Crowdstrike is fucking up? Serious question

>>101466277
Back in Uni, some friends would go donate blood. The doctors who collected blood would give them a doctors notice, suggesting a day of medical leave.
Take of that story what you will.

>>101466326
Honestly, knowing from ex-MS employees what the windows backend looks like... I would not be surprised that something like that spread through the MS ecosystem for some fucking reason.

>>101465748
>install malware
>wtf why is my computer not working?

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>>101465384
lmao
>do self checkout out at woolies supermarket today
>was about to pay
>BSOD
>walked out with my groceries

>>101466326
People that don't know better just blame windows. Even if Anon knows Crowdstrike is to blame, that doesn't mean their coworkers know.

When you BSOD and it's every machine all at once, anyone without IT training for that organization will immediately assume Microsoft is to blame. Hell you could even be trained in the IT there and still jump to microsoft until you have time to sit and think and not be in a code red esque situation.

why didn’t Copilot fix this?

>>101466315
It's not really microsoft's fault. It's a Crowdstrike bug that happens to be Windows only.
In fact, everybody that's affected can blame Crowdstrike, but they should really be blaming themselves for installing some auto-updating glowie kernel level rootkit on LITERALLY ALL their machines.

>someone redeemed the card

>>101466326
Windows signs off on every driver. It's their responsibility to make sure the distributed drivers are working as intended.
This is always been brought up when a driver-hijacking virus showed up, but Windows has a fair counter-point of "Well, we can't see every possible virus but we do our best".
This outage, however, is unacceptable.

>>101466277
Jesus...have fun I guess.

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>need to get groceries on the way home from work
>zero chance this will be fixed in the next 2 hours

What's crowdstrike and why does it break windows? Do I need to worry?

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Lmao.

>>101466417
It's like an anti-virus or something, only companies use it.

>>101466417
Some glownigger kernel mode antivirus.
If you don't know what it is, you've never installed it, so you're fine

>>101466430
Do you see cyber skeleton sheep anywhere? Means they're doing their job

>>101466409
thanks anon, i'm stealing this gif

>>101465419
how are you getting BSODs by the swarms? first time i've seen something like this. Just how connected are these machines to BSOD on a whim

YEAR OF THE LINUX DESKTOP(server) IS FINALLY HAPPENING THANK YOU GLOWIES

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>theres even complaints on our telegram channel
should i just pretend that i got malaria or something?

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oof, yikes, zoinks, badoink

>>101466462
>What it takes for Microsoft to give up their hegemony is microsoft themselves
Ironic.

>>101465587
remember that when the next cloudflare hate thread pops up

AI and Indians are going to kill us all

>>101466105
it is "fixed" from their side, faggot. But, the affected machines are still in ruins

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>>101466430
>gaymer-tier marketing for a "professional" product

>>101466430
That's just fucking sad.

REDEEEEEM THE PATCH SAARS REEDEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEMMMMMMMMMM THE PATCH.

Finally you're learning the hard way that you should use LTSC

>>101466347
can i just go to any redcross and said that i want to donate blood? i think i rather sent my blood to jews at this point

>>101466506
Has nothing to do with windows retard, its an anti-virus software that a lot of companies use.

>>101466506
LTSC machines are the most affected since it is third party software that caused this problem.

>>101466489
>non-coder suits pretending to be gamers to look more technically apt
>they do that to sell their product to non-coder middle aged women
I call it divine intervention, they were appropriating our culture and God is a gamer.

>>101466537
>its an anti-virus software that a lot of companies use
Half of Forbes 100 uses it.

>Just come home from work after dealing with a system issue
>Start to shitpost on 4chan
>Find this out
FUCK, MONDAY IS GOING TO SUCK

> Using windows for critical infrastructure
> Using Crowdstrike on top
Lmao. That's what you get when retards run your ship

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>>101466430
so do you think somebody at crowdstrike is losing their job over this

>>101465523
Yes. Everypony has had many years at this point to install Troonix, so anyone affected by this has no one to blame but themselves

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>anon, me nigger mcfuckface are getting complaints from our vip users! Can you fix dem computer already??
FUCKING FUCK FUCK FUCK I WANT TO SHOOT EVERYSINGLE NIGGERS IN PUBLIC RELATIONS AND HR ALREADY

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What issues?

>Allowing auto-updooting

With how in sync it was AND how many MAJOR shit got affected, this is going to be a fucking bloodbath.
Penguin bros... we might see the year come sooner than expected. Imagine, Debian cash registers.

>>101466090
Is this actually a metric? I'd be interested to see the comparison. It's also probably not an amazing metric, given that you basically just have to take Microsoft at their word, right?

kekkk

>>101466616
The CEO has to resign after this.

>>101466677
lol
lmao even

>>101466619
kek.
get fucked faggot!
imagine working for DEI compliance company

>>101466616
everyone is about to
crowdstrike isnt gonna be around after the end of the year lel

>>101466677
Some junior they forced to release is gonna get fired, that's about it.

>>101466616
Considering there is currently nothing but shitty leet gamer PR over on their website (seriously go have a look), and not a single statement concerning affected systems, I think crowdstrike itself could be losing its job over this.

Yawn, this is only a problem for IT professionals and no one else. Nothing is fucking happening, there is already a workaround, and shit will be fixed before America wakes up.

>>101466677
Rajesh is getting fired and then it's back to business. CEO salary will be raised to help him recover.

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we need to retvrn to tradition... i'm sick and tired of this faggy condescending millennial frowny face bullshit :(

>>101466677
His name sounds like a jew he'll be fine

>>101466711
And the rest of the company after it goes into bankruptcy, anon. The company is over. These kinds of platforms are built on trust, and if you can't trust the company you can't use their software.

So what the fuck is going on? How is this crowdstrikes fault? Did they push some update worldwide at the same time that fucked it all? Isn't that why you roll updates out a bit slower?

>>101466655
I've seen pajeets use really out of date openoffice spreadsheets front end for their point of sales system at a fruit shop, the shop is also open 24/7 and the produce is dirt cheap so I have no idea how the fuck they're turning a profit. Pajeets will just work every waking hour for no gain or reason

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>>101466430
You can't be hacked if your systems are down

>>101466277
>nigger using gmail at work

>>101466726
https://securitybrief.com.au/story/crowdstrike-launches-falcon-complete-next-gen-mdr-system
3 days ago

>>101466737
t. neet that used cock.li for daily use

Today was supposed to be my last day before vacation, I am a sysadmin. I want to piss, shit and vomit.

>>101466451
Crowdstrike probably has timed updates and as soon as the update hit it caused a bsod

>one company killing every Windows on Earth
Nice one microshit kek

>>101466760
>aiming to stop breaches with rapid and precise interventions across the entire enterprise attack surface
I guess you can't have breaches if nothing works.

>>101466765
Just call in sick

>>101466765
Just go man. Fuck 'em.

Biggest IT outage in the history of the universe.

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>>101466760
So they roll out features to every fucking computer worldwide at the same time? What the fuck.

>>101466821
This, but supposedly. We can only estimate the outages on the antediluvian era.

>>101466831
do the needful and redeem the update saar

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kek

>>101466831
without testing, and on non-white hours.

>>101466831
It's a security update anon! Not updating would leave their customers without critical security updates.

>>101466831
I wonder if they follow the move fast and break things motto.

>>101465547
>>101465556
Oh fuck off the both of you

SAAAAR DO NOT REDEEM
DO NOT REDEEEM THE UPDATE SAAAR

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reminder almost exclusively affects: the fully vaccinated, wagies, NPCs, city slickers, non-whites and brainlets

not my problem

AI wouldn’t have had this problem

How bad is this shit going to be

This is an attack orchestrated by Red Hat to sell more RHEL licences, I just know it.

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>>101465384
>>101465459
This can't be real.

>>101466914
guess how the updated code was written

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>>101466858
>on non-white hours.

Can confirm that Kmart, Woolworths and Big W are having issues, to the point of some stores closing down operations for customers.

Insane, absolutely insane. Hopefully it gets the head offices to consider switching all the checkouts form Windows 7 enterprise/POS

>>101465748
>Single botched pajeetware update causes entire OS to be stuck in BSOD bootloop
Not a windows issue, suuuure.

>>101466914
You're retarded.

>>101466430
the entire US tech industry is a fucking scam at this point

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Crowdstrike is banned from being used in China. So they're basically not being affected by this at all

>>101465590
If a botched Windows update fucks all your dumb terminals it doesn't matter what you put on the server.

>>101466943
Yeah. You install cloudstrike software and it bricks your system.
If you didn't install cloudstrike then your system is fine. I don't know what kind of room temperature IQ you need to not comprehend this but I'm thinking arctic circle.

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>>101465384
Holy fuckerino batman.

Everything is fine here...

>>101466967
Isn't all of China on their own chinkshit linux distro at this point?
I kneel

>>101466937
I dunno why the fuck POS/self checkout shit is still Windows, absolute insanity. Even most pokies switched to Linux years ago, they know whats up.

>>101466910
this comment makes absolutely zero sense.

>>101466943
It's a kernel driver, so yes, even the most mundane memory error can do that.
People have been saying this for years, and it even made mainstream news lately because of gaymers installing those retarded anti-cheat kernel drivers.
But you know how normalfags are. They just don't listen.

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>>101466914

Not a problem on our Windows 7 machines.
Updooters BTFO

>>101466910
this comment makes zero sense.

>>101466993
t. Winjeet wageing for a Winjeet company

>>101466963
I always wished I was born a year earlier so I could have been alive during y2k but now I don't have to anymore. I'm actually living through it and I'm old enough to actually be affected by it!

Serves anyone right for connecting their systems to the internet mindlessly.
So many affected computers should just be on a local network.

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>im gona
>IM GONAAA
>IM GOONAAA UPDOOOOOOT

>>101466537
Never heard of it and just few months ago I was talking with a marketing guy about enterprise antivirus solutions. Is this some US exclusive product?

>>101466993
you must be new here

>>101466987
> The shareholders DEMAND they get a bajillion dollars a year in dividends

>>101466974
Yes and the fact it can even do that just proves how much of a joke windblows is for running your infrastructure on.

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>>101466999
>advanced AI capabilities
>AI: I AM THE PROBLEM SHUT IT DOWN
Did they make it depressed?

>>101465384
AppleCHADS won

Nothing-ever-happens bros... our response?

>>101466506
They are probably using IoT LTSC, retrad.

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fuck I have to take on monday.
I'm finished

>>101466129
>can say people have been killed because of this mistake due to the nature of my agency.
>Australia
Bullshit.

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>>101466910
>tfw you just bought a 24 pack of toilet paper this morning

>>101467041
You don't know how an operating system works do you? Any root level software that starts fucking around with kernel drivers can crash the system. It's why operating systems moved away from 'kernel everything' in the fucking mid 90s. This situation is why you don't run kernel drivers from third parties.

>>101465384
Lmao. Linuxniggers keep on winning.


>>101466964
This is embarrassing.

>>101466368
M A D L A D
A
D
L
A
D

One company doing a fucky wucky resulted in all of this. Just one company fucked up their update. This is beyond grim.

>>101466967
Russia is using Kaspersky instead of this shovelware. Coincidentally, not so long ago Kaspersky was banned in the US.

Imagine trusting some dumb ass texan company because some stupid avian logo

>>101466506
>Finally you're learning the hard way that you should use Linux, and literally just not install kernel level spyware
Fixed

***** CROWDSTRIKE JUST PREVENTED A GLOBALSCALE CYBERATTACK

THE BSOD ARE PROTECTION MECHANISMS

Guess who put our company on SentinelOne ;-))))) ShartStrike is done lel.

>pushing an update out on a Friday
top tier trolling

Tim Cook would be ordering a new Mclaren if any service was actually up right now.

>>101467077
>This situation is why you don't run kernel drivers from third parties.
Might as well not bother using computers at all at that point

>>101466287
>unable to boot xray machine
>xray machine now operates at full blast
why would it sir, this is not possibly a race condition

Ten fat mexicans are fixing this as we speak

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>>101467102
>ShartStrike

>>101466277
Just pretend you get BSoD bro...

>>101467101
Source?

HOW CAN THEY FIX IT IF IT KEEPS CRASHING?
BSOD DURING UPDATE = BRICKED OS

Question : How do planes in transit RIGHT NOW can land every airport is non functional ?

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wouldn't happen with protegent

>>101467119
On my gnu slash loonix machine, I don't use any drivers other than the ones that come packaged in the distro's repos. I don't know what you're talking about.

>>101467106
anyone got the patch notes?

>>101467151
They fly to the airport, and when there is a space on the runway they get radio'd that they're cleared to land.
It's the admin stuff that runs windows, ATC can be done with walkie talkies and pen and paper if they needed.

>>101467151
Think its more of a ATC / Airport problem. Im pretty sure any planes can land but they might be without the lights/RF guidance. I find it hard to believe any planes would have this type of shit on it.

>>101466347
Can I open my veins instead?

>haha you're paranoid bro Windows updates never killed anyone haha just allow every one to just execute arbitrary code to your machine haha

>>101466105
that's not a fix, it's a workaround

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>>101467088
Everyone was busy with replacing uint32 to uint64 to prevent the 2038 problem. Snap back to reality, everyone was connected to a single shovelware company responsible for the security of everything worldwide. A company that employs street shitters, who roll out a global update. On Friday. With no canary release, no QA team or any other kind of testing. This is beyond fucking stupid, but every single smarty pants out there thought it was the hottest shit.

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Sirs...

How come a single third party program update breaks important infrastructure? Where's testing, redundancy, backups? Seems incredibly negligent for every involved party, both Crowdstrike and their users.

>>101467163
>commit message: did the needful
>signed off by: RAJEESH POOMALOO

>>101465384
works on my machine

>>101467137
topkek

has it affected personal computers?

>workaround is renaming/deleting stuff from the sys32 folder

Oh, this gonna be funny as fuck. I can see self nuking already.

>using physical windows machines in the year of our Lord 2024

Just finished my shift at the A&E clinic and what would normally be a quiet shift was mental. Some of the doctors were freaking out as our healthcare PMS was down and now they can't get Boomer Steve's contact details to let him know his INR levels are dangerously high and he might bleed out. I imagine hospitals are hell right now.

>>101467197
Yes. Yes it is incredibly negligent and incompetent.

>>101467192
This nigga's goin bananas!

>>101466985
yep, every infrastructure is required to use it and soon it will be the same for the hardware side (big companies and gvt companies are required to use their chinese cpu).

Both companies I work with are just completely offline. I am on leave so I don’t care but shit is insane.

I was not aware that so much stuff runs on windows.

>>101467197
Local redundancy is expensive and a thing of the past. Now that we can securely store your data in the cloud for a small monthly fee.

>>101466618
you can't install or use troonix without internet. windows is just playing catch up.

>>101467156
Yes, everyone should just downgrade their systems into neofetch shitposting machines, because that's what you use and because everything you don't use is "le bad". Fucking autist.

>>101467228
>mental
so, medically speaking, what do you do when you're at near breaking point, what's the metaphorical balm and ointment used
serious question
i start an intense but short job next week (unrelated to this shitshow kek)

>>101467258
It's horrendous, and not even new windows.

>>101467258
People think uhooh windows is dying but it's on fucking everything. Microsoft does not give a shit about home PCs, they make up such a small % of their sales.

>>101467258
Have you ever gone anywhere or worked any job in the past 25 years?

Some hospitals are also kill, patients who had appointments for things like cancer treatments told to go home

>>101467258
lol. lmao

>>101467291
most people don't work here.

>>101467258
Ever heard of ransomware? They make the news every month.
But yea same, I thought windows success was because of home PC, not because of biz services.

>>101467291
In my company there's only one windows server, the rest is linux and bsd. So it's very surprising to hear large firms were so dependent on it.

>>101467265
Local (or remote) redundancy wouldve saved you here thats the cherry on top

Both redundant servers would have gotten the update and bsod at the same time

This is how it begins. LINUX supremacy.

>>101467049
Chuds are unemployed, it doesn't affect them.

Retard here: Why are these software needed and why do they need to be allowed to mess with window's kernel at such a deep lvl access?

>>101466446
Now I believe that anon saying people are being killed because of this

>>101467274
you take a vacation

>>101467228
>they can't get Boomer Steve's contact details to let him know his INR levels are dangerously high and he might bleed out

based, thank you crowdstrike

Total Boomer Death

>>101467347
Security for POS, enterprise and embedded systems

>>101467340
* would not have saved you

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>ShartStrike
>non-white hours
Top lel

>my machine is unaffected
fml

>>101465384
Same in the chemical plant I work in. PCS is still working but every other pc crashed.

>>101467258
I got x-rayed by windows xp once, 3 years ago. Bankshit is even older.

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>hire jeets
>everything breaks
competency crisis is getting worse. is this will common occurrences going forward

My boss wants to sue Crowdstrike lmfao.

>>101467347
same reason why gaymer anticheats need to dig so deep into the system
its a security suite afterall

>>101466858
kek

>>101466616
Yes, all the white men.

How long will this realistically take to be fixed? If it's not fixed by tomorrow I suspect I will be called in and I don't want to work on a Saturday

>>101467457
Well, you might have to act like a man and understand that when an emergecy arises, you have to do your bit.
Might just be time to grow up.

>>101467436
I'd say they have the right to

>>101467488
I will NOT redeem the overtime shift sar

>>101467457
how long does it take to manually reinstall winjeet in every single one of your wage cage's system?

>>101467347
It's a security solution used to monitor machines across an entire network. In order to detect malware at a deep level, the Crowdstrike agent also needs the same or deeper levels of access.

>>101467457
>How long will this realistically take to be fixed?
3

>>101467436
He needs to hurry up if he wants a settlement before they go bankrupt

>>101467502
2

>>101467514
1

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>randomly lay off engineers
>keep DEI scum
>get surprised

>>101467457
>How long will this realistically take to be fixed
So your company has 10 servers. Each one has to be booted in safe mode. Manually. This cannot be automated, unless it is a thin terminal where you can detach the volume and fix it remotely. So most of this shit is NOT a thin terminal. So it has to be booted manually. Then you need to manually remove the offending file. 10 servers, it's not that hard and will not take you much time to fix it. But some companies have hundreds of servers. Thousands of them, in fact. Every single affected device has to be booted and fixed, by hand. There is no way around it, because the kernel is stuck in a bootloop, so it does not even come to the state where you can fetch the update remotely.

Unless there is a way to automate it which I don't know about, you guys are all fucked.

>>101467457
Then don't sign a contract that allows you to be called in.

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>>101467488
Come on now, he's not a Chad Linux user. He's a weak pathetic M$ cuck who's whole life lives in the cloud...that's where his wife gets creampied by smelly Indian men too i bet, KEK!

>>101465384
can't this be automated with winpe? literally a script that mounts the hard drive and deletes the file

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>>101467457
If you believe Australian ABC, then hours or days

>>101467534
Most companies use vms so it's not that big of a deal. You have orchestration. Way to out yourself for never having a job.

>>101467564
Which I said, if it's a thin terminal. Way to out your braindead reading comprehension you insecure faggot.

>>101467555
It could. Problem is BitLocker.

>installing 3rd party anti virus other than kaspersky
why?

I have a Windows 10 computer at home, no problem
A Windows 11 computer also, no problem
And my corporate personal laptop with Windows 10? Also no problem

Why am I not having any problems? Fake and gay!

>>101467588
jews

>>101467594
Because you don't have a job

>>101467594
You're retarded. The issue is with a Enterprise security driver for POS and embdedded devices. Are you running an POS machine or an embedded device? I'd say yes, only because your brain is as capable as an STM32

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>>101467561
>>101467561
>If you believe Australian ABC, then hours or days
Believe these clowns at your peril

>>101467534
Not that anon but I work at a medical center which relies on Indici (a cloud based electronic health records system). Does this mean our center has to wait until they're done rebooting all their server's computers?

>>101467594
Because you don't have Crowdstrike installed.

>>101467581
You mean VM retard, NO ONE calls them that. You don't know what you're talking about. You're going to piss all over your keyboard for your next post.

>>101467594
cuz you don't use brownstrike retardbwo

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>>101467594

>>101466129
>>101467063
Shouldn't have installed CrowdStrike on your ground harness systems

>>101466765
Btfo

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>be sysadmin
>Infrastructure you manage is 99% linux or bsd
>zero major outages in all the years you've been doing your job because the people making the decisions aren't clueless boomers that got coaxed into running windows for their infrastructure

>>101467564
most employees use dedicated laptops too, genius

>>101466765
lawyer up and get rich after suing them for breaching contract

>>101467646
Imagine throwing a tantrum because you are so insecure you have to prove someone online that you are a certified wagie. First, try to have more than one job experience, then grow up and we may talk like grown adults without your meme projections. Until then, you are just a manchild.

>>101465459
>step 1: take down the cctv
we're in

>>101467686
>You mean there is a free software that's more secure and not run by jewish demon worshipers?
>That's correct sir, it's run by some severely autistic transsexuals who mostly survive of government disability hand outs.
>Oh I see....but it's free right.
>Oh yes sir, free updates for life too.
>?????????
>Profits

These major incidents always make it blatantly obvious how clueless /g/ is about computers.

>>101466129
You also have 300 confirmed kills right?

>>101467733
They prefer the term
>House Nigger

>>101466287
what line of business is that? uranium factory?

I don't get it
So windows servers and windows machines are affected
Aren't all companies running VM's anyway and what's the big deal of restarting them or remotely booting into safe mode?!
Can't this be easily automated

>>101466287
are you working at black mesa or something

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>>101466903

>>101467802
wow gee, just restart it remotely, thanks retard, why didn't we think of that? let me get on the phone, problem's solved

>>101467802
For VMs it's fine. So long as you know; they weren't running bitlocker. And the bitlocker server is fine. Or the jump server you use to access the ESXi or iLO or whatever is fine. Which they won't be if they were running CS.

For machines like sales terminals and embedded systems, there's nothing you can do but physically go the machine and boot it into safe mode.

>>101467063
>Bullshit.
911 is down because of this shit and hospitals are affected as well
guaranteed this has lead to deaths

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>>101467802
Hold up everyone, step aside. The genius just walked in with the solution!

>>101467847
You said you were in Australia.
Theres no 911 in Australia

>>101467834
It's almost like linking all the world's computers to a single point of failure, then turning that failure nexus over to a greedy corporation run by street shitters was a bad idea.....shocking I know, but it's true.

>>101467871
Im not that anon

>>101466765
>hrm, uh yes, is this techwagie?
>hrm, yeah, looks like we’re gonna need you to go ahead and cancel that vacation of yours, looks like some kinda internet problem or something
>hrm, what’s that? Flight’s already booked? Oh no need to worry about that, they’ve all been grounded and delayed a few weeks out. They’re even offering partial refunds to businesses affected by the outage.
>hrm, yes, very unfortunate. I’m hurting from this too, y’know. I’m trying to enjoy my vacation in the bahamas and here I am having to call you to hurry up and do your job already. And now my flight out’s been canceled and I’ll have to take another week of paid leave at least before another flight can be scheduled.

>>101467882
Well, why didnt you say so?

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>>101467915
I'm not that NTA but I'm a frogposter

>>101467621
Crowdstrike.is not just embedded or POS retard, its also on clients and servers. Entirely depends on how the company deployed it

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>>101467923

>>101467151
Planes themselves don't run on Windows, thankfully. Otherwise every other passenger jet would be a 737 MAX waiting to happen.

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saars bls

>>101467974
Imagine a world where the third world never got internet access
We'd have colonies on the moon by now

>>101468001
Cope. Cloudshit is a product of Western greed, largely perpetrated by white men (not that it matters).

>>101468001
imagine a world where americans had more than 97% literacy
we might teach them some math, too

>>101467834
>So long as you know; they weren't running bitlocker.
AFAIK bit locker is related to the tpm chip, like a safety encryption measure
What does that have to do with this outage?
So sales terminal and embedded systems are the most affected?

>>101465384
revealed yourself as an ozfailian!

>>101466287
>Some of our forklifts are testing a Windows-based control system that forces people to use periodic biometric authentication to operate.
based black mesa early wagecage prototype

>>101466315
>companies use windows for mission critical systems?
not really but they do use windows for lots of other systems
doesn't really matter if your mission critical systems are fine if nothing else works

>>101468118
KEK, DNA encoded wage cages. Black Mirror present is cray. What happens to the waggie in the cage when it get's an update? Does he get fried too or just trapped in the cage with no food or water until someone rescues xim/xer? But all the other waggies are likely stuck in their cages too. TOP KEK.

>>101465459
how did you get a security guard job while blind

>>101468138
>doesn't really matter if your mission critical systems are fine if nothing else works
Wouldn't that be the most basic definition of the word mean that those systems are ALSO MISSION CRITICAL seeing as how the lack of said systems CRITICALLY IMPACTS THE MISSION'S ABILITY TO FUNCTION.

Christ help you retards, do people pay you real money to be this fucking stupid?
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ilcRS5eUpwk

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>>101467102
>SentinelOne
look at the founders, then look at their DEI policies

>>101468160
Clear as day that scenario popped in my head and now my sides are in orbit

>>101467182
do it over a microsoft server, maybe spawning satan himself will fix everything

>>101466129
>>101466247
I believe you because I saw a fuck ton of cops driving around where I normally don't.

>>101466287
>people fucking dead
At least a thousand people are gonna die, probably way more

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>>101466277
>someone fucks it badly
>I am the one that has to fix everything at the speed of light
no, fuck off, I'm still waiting for my coffee

>>101467151
you think their guidance systems run on windows? windows is only for customer facing operations

>>101467564
>Most companies use vms so it's not that big of a deal. You have orchestration. Way to out yourself for never having a job.
authentication servers are not on VMs, retarded faggot. You arent even high level enough to continue this discussion, codemonkey.