Caesars Palace edition
>>201769716Ave, true to Caesar!
>>201769716can still smoke inside thereit's like a time machine
>>201772222be quiet you evil ape
>>201772222blessed place, pubs and bars should be allowed to set their own policies on whether to allow smoking or not, there's no kids allowed mostly so why the frick not
visiting my sister on the weekendwhat should I buy my seven year old nephew? no occasion but don't want to show up empty handed
>>201772239uncalled for
A SUCCULENT CHINESE MEAL!
never understood the appeal of gambling
sir, this is a sperm bank
woman, perfected
>>201772267mid
mental how paris is keeping the olympic rings on the eiffel tower in perpetuity
any cities: skylines man in
don't like gary eats
Sitting in the drive thru line of the bank doing fuck all because it’s not open yet.
Porn
>>201772303>bank with a drive thruwhat a world we live in
the sperm bank turned down my application for a loan
>>201772267actual obesity
>>201772277why do you care, brucie?
off to the bumming park
>>201772263win sometimes
Question for the toilers of /brit/:If you could live however you wanted (you can afford anything you want) and not have to toil anymore, would you never toil again?
want to get some eggs from the shop but don't want to move the car in case the cunt neighbours steal my space but also don't want to walk all the way back carrying a box of eggs cause i'd look like a weirdo
>>201772267imagine the bollockcrushing she's capable of in those heels
Leftypol holding up a sperm bank
>>201772376ok
got my plug in
>>201772362I'd live in a converted campervan and if the maintenance didn't keep me busy enough then I'd find myself a project that involves travelling around - buy and sell, maybe
>don't want to walk all the way back carrying a box of eggs cause i'd look like a weirdoFascinating glimpse into a deranged mind
>>201772362Well obviously you imbecile
why do women love mullets and moustaches literally every hinge account mentions these (and f1)
2018... the year football died
This country is an evil shithole
>>201772376this is starmer's britain
>>201772390You watch too much antiques roadshow
>>201772425got nothing to do with anything actually from this country though, does it
>>201772267not Asian enough
could just put on my virgin rucksack and hide the eggs in there
was disappointed, hope the filling would be chewier like cola haribos
>>201772455too asian
>>201772330Normal in America.
Time for a wank I think, just what to is the question
>>201770604funny, I'm playing trannyvegas now
>>201772465why would it be are you actually fucking thick
wagies about to have their "lunch break" lmao
>>201772361the house always wins
>>201772495___
two months since the election and still the railways haven't been renationalised
>>201772509neets dont have sex albeit
>>201772508because I like that
>>201772376mate u already look like a weirdomy evidenceyou havnig this thought process at all
>>201772495https://leak.xxx/videos/13819572/onlyfans-michelle-wilson-sex-broadcast-leaks-pack-part-1/
gay porn break
>>201772543you wake up hogtied in catyank's living room
>>201772529neither do wagiesbeing fucked by your boss doesn't count lmao
>>201772376get a bag at the store you fucking spastic
miss the times when it didn't hurt to poo
>>201772591perplexing post
>>201772581women would rather shag a guy with a job than one on benefits
>>201772575Lol
off to the sugarcane fields anyone want anything
>>201772575screm
VR is something else... the 'future" is now.
saw three utter mong learner drivers during my commute today
>>201772642cup of flour la xx
>>201772633i really wish this is true
>>201772667learner drivers are all using my street latelydoing my head in i'm a man on the move get out of my way
my job? sex arse pilot.
>>201772689you will be patient
I'm 28 and can't drive
next time you see a learner driver look at their skin colour 90% chance they aren't white
still in ma jammies
>>201772722how'd you manage that
woke mob banning white people from learning to drive
>>201772730Just never bothered desu
>>201772664can't wait to play Low-hanging Banana Eating and Skinny Wardrobe Shifting Simulator
four McD cheeseburgers for lunch
imagine being too much of a gimp to be able to buy eggs
mad how fit they are
>>201772750mentalgot two cars me
>>201772759better off getting two doubles
>>201772770bro has never heard of a carrier bag
>>201772754dig in lad
lay my own eggs, dont need to buy them
The lunch 'za
>>201772770could if i really wanted to and i could afford to buy a hell of lot more eggs than you i bet
>>201772792yh?
havent eaten an egg since the woke mob got their hands on them
>>201772722i started driving at 14. Doubt you will be able to pick it up now. Cant teach an old dog new tricks.
I thought you had to take the eggs out of the box in the shop, had to cradle them in my jumper while running home in case anyone saw methey didn't make it
>>201772809got monkeypox?
what do you eat in a day, on average?
Top of the morning you bloody wankers
>>201772788no it's notshut up
cant trust those brown eggs. stick to the white me
>>201772770The first time I went to buy eggs I only wanted 2 and so I took 2 from the box and tried to find them on the self service item list. It's easy for you to call people gimps when you've bought eggs before.
hatching an egg
>>201772809At least there's olives on it, nice and healthy
>>201772818>Cant teach an old dog new tricksThat saying means they don't want to learn
the ACTUAL perfect woman
>>201772836what you doing over there then lad
>The first time I went to buy eggs I only wanted 2 and so I took 2 from the box and tried to find them on the self service item list
>>201772889
>>201772889>>201772847sensational
>>201772866And at 28 its pretty clear he doesnt want to learn.
>At least 10 future brain surgeons are in a critical condition after a boat carrying 100 people capsized in the English Channel
Haven't slept more than 4-5 hours a night since I quit smoking last month. Might get back on the lovely fags
got tickets for me and gfberg to see rorke the musical at sunderland empire
tbf it IS easy to call people gimps when you've bought eggs before
>>201772947heard rave reviewsquite a biting commentary
>>201772946How did a stimulant help you sleep?
>At least 10 chickens are in a critical condition after a boat carrying 100 eggs capsized in the English Channel
>>201772847bahhahhahhahhhahaah what the fuck lad
rorke ordering tesco delivery for one singular egg
>>201772942Weasel we both know your implication
reckon humans would never of gotten anything done if they didn't have the notion of suffering to push them
Rumours flying around that Oasis will only be playing tracks from Standing on the Shoulder of Giants and Heathen Chemistry at their reunion gigs
>>201772965dependency
>>201772973media leaving out the fact they were all brown eggs
>>201772965You're thick
>>201772965No clue but this happens every time I try to quit. I've even cut back to 1 cup of coffee in the morning and that doesn't help either
>>201773027So's yer mums arse
ive literally never had sexnever been on a datenever had a gfdespite being in my mid 30sand leaving the housegoing to parties/clubs/drinkingbeing otherwise normali should be the subject of science
>>201773037and so's the black cock that enters it
Looking forward to the dead rising remaster
wtf a rumour that Oasis will only be playing tracks from Standing on the Shoulder of Giants and Heathen Chemistry at their reunion gigs just flew over my house
>>201772996wake me up when the smiths get back together
did you know tarot cards were originally called triumph cards which is where we get the word "trumps" :D
Get a life spaino your stink is all over
>>201773055fantastic post. get an egg down you lad xx
>>201773055Won't happen, Johnny Marr tweeted a photo of Nigel Farage when he was asked about it last week This is his way of saying he does not like Morrissey's politics
>>201773043never too late
Rorke making his one night stand a bowl of eggs
>>201773043No one to blame but yourself kid
we're all one bad away from sometimes smelling like fish or shit
I have never even kissed a girl
insane that ostriches have to poo out eggs this bigmakes sense that theyre total cunts
Still haven't gotten over The Jeremy Kyle Show being axed
Yeah just get a job and also work better to get a better job. You need that better job. You can't be driving to your better job in a bad car now can you? You need to be paid more. Morning until night for the majority of your life will be worth it because you'll have a better job.Retirement? Lazy cunt. Fine. 68 you can retire. Life expectancy is only 78? Life expectancy has recently been falling at a rate not seen since world war 2? More than 1 in 10 men die before 65? Shut up. Work more.
I buy eggs at the Polish corner shop where they have 25 eggs per pack on the cheap.
>>201773140paki corner shop lads reeling over this bombshell
thinking of getting fatanyone else?tired of being skinny. need a good layer of flubber to fill out my tshirts.
You know who you have to feel sorry for?It's Noel Gallagher's High Flying Birds
>They also found an apparently stronger link with death from heart and circulatory disease (and from diabetes) when the eggs were not fried.Wtf did the BHF mean by this
>>201773082sucking an egg
>>201773126male ostriches are the biggest cunts and they're not the ones who do it
leftypol actually thinks that when chickens lay eggs that come out in a little carton
>>201773168Beady Eye are the real losers here
>Russian missile strike on Ukrainian city of Poltava kills 41 people, with 180 others wounded, Volodymr Zelenskyy says
>>201773118not even wasted in a nightclub?
leftypol insisting male ostriches can lay eggs too
>>201769716Remember when father christmas went there? Looked fun
>>201773140it ain't natural to sell eggs in odd numbers
there's a very easy solution to our budget problems
Should become a water treatment operator and climb up the ranks of a municipality so I can be a corrupt bureaucrat by the time the American Southwest dries up and everyone comes up here as refugees
>>201773140Polish corner shop has weird drinks and snacks and the fella always tells me which ones are good and what they say. Reckon all corner shops should be Polish corner shops
looool hope you're in pain old cunt
>>201773219*kvetches*
>>201773201More British tanksHigher taxMore wogs
>>201773129ngl i still miss it
>>201773236Don't get /fr/ started
>>201773228I wish our ethnic stores were this niceThe fuckers here running those ethnic stores don't even speak english
>>201772875>asianno
>>201773161Yes I think about it. I have the Tyson Fury build with massive hips. Should probably just get really fat so you can't tell
>>201773129Watching the news are kid?
anime
>>201773219>sciences is a woman
4 corner shops in my town. 3 paki shops. 1 is English and thats where I shop.
Supporting local businesses.Gave my mum £15 for a handjob.
matey's town is a square
>>201773289
Rorke trekking 10 miles just to buy an english made Freddo
>>201773329haha
You ever think some lad given up for adoption met up with an old whore because of his mommy issues and it turned out to be his birth mother unknown to him?
I shop wherever is cheapest and has what I want because I am not a racist. Not my fault it's always the English or Polish fellas shop.
>>201773381That's similar to the plot of Oldboy whoops spoiler alert!
my local shop has 5 corners
Sitka. Home.
the trick is to only go where the chinese are shopping because they won't put up with shite prices because theyre all cheap
Going to the corner shop and buying two corners
I'm about to complete on my first property, an 81 square metre 2-bed terraced house in a decent area, a 20 minute drive from where I work. Buying as a single earner, having saved up for a 15% deposit.
>>201773394
Might move to China
>>201773316She ripped you off m8. I give her a tenner and tell her to keep the change.
Might move to China.
Friendly reminder that anime is for nonces.
>>201773394Aldi then, which is German.
>>201773586How so?
Aldi’s stuff tastes weirdTheir beans have a weird textureTheir potatoes and other vegetables go bad really fast
>>201773400>has 5 cornerssay this to my gfthen I call her my little peng-tagon
brighton on a chewsday afternoon
>Is that an anime!?>How old is that girl!?>You're wanking to that girl! You must be! How could you not be wanking and jerking off to that cartoon!?>Just look at how sexy she is! You must be wanking your thick hard cock to her!>You nonce!Odd behaviour. Do you reckon they start wanking off to animated Disney movies too?
if you wank to the CHILDREN in animes, you're a nonce
done him
>>201773671…bruh
>>201773741meeting of the minds there
>>201773741lmfao
>>201773741What? >men have to do all this backbreaking labour and women don't care>oh yeah? well women mostly have cushy "lazy girl" jobs like these! It makes 0 sense.
>>201773763meeting of the mind
>>201773490blog on you boring bastard
Wish I could be a kindergarten teacher.
>>201773741Do you reckon I could be a flight attendant as a straight white guy?I know their job is to just look pretty and bring business men drinks but surely there must be some rich women flying about who want a male flight attendant.They can squeeze my arse after I bring them their pinot noir
odds i walkevens i do the washing updubs i fuck it off and continue looking at cheap holidays
>>201773741>lactation consultantstf is that
team that deals with security at my company sent a fake bonus email for a phishing testknew it was fake because of how miserly they were then fumed about the gall of it
>>201773741I applied to my lactation consultant dream job but was REJECTED due to SEXISM in that industry
What's mousey doing this very moment?
>>201773741It's over for Rorke
>>201773829Only male ones I’ve seen are campy gaysThey have to do that dancing shit when they point out the exits and stuff
>>201773829Won’t work, any time I see a male flight attendant I instantly think GAY
>>201773829Mate done that job for about 6 years and said he shagged almost every single air hostess he ever met on the job, most of whom were married. And if he wasn't shagging them, pilots were.
>>201773741>all the jobs society requires or will collapse are men>all the frivolous bullshit jobs that are a drain on society are womenThats curious
filled with evil energy
>>201773905Your mate definitely tells the truth 100%
>>201773868Sleeping
>>201773911kindergarten teachers and therapists are necessary
>>201773905You're telling my there's a job that consists of flying about to foreign countries and shagging and my only responsibility is pointing at emergency exits and bringing people peanuts?
>>201773905was he good looking or was it bullshit
Late lunch for me Early finish tooComfy 2 hour home stretch of toil for today then two days WFH
>>201773868slithering around glasgow like a snake looking for ciggies
>Mate done that job for about 6 years and said he shagged almost every single air hostess he ever met on the job, most of whom were married. And if he wasn't shagging them, pilots were.
>>201773964you also have to be peng
>>201773997classique
Often nearly miss the news because I have canadians filtered.
>ex gf became an air hostess for Emirates and moved to Dubai
>>201773997this would work if he were talking about himself you imbecile
convinced the polish wife to sign the stop killing games initiativehave backroom access to EU politics me
>>201774027imagine how many times shes been pooed on
>>201773976He's a known top shagger even when he's just here with us, so I have no doubt in my mind he was telling the truth. Good looking bloke, though a bit short.>>201773964It would appear so.
*knocks on your door*
>>201774027Arabs have shat on her
>>201774045he's still trying to make himself sound cool
>>201774006Always a catch. Maybe I can be one of the blokes that puts the suitcases in the fuselage
>>201773905
>>201774045Jay often brags about his made up pals if you watched the series
>>201773958lol noif women were in the home raising their own children (and grandchildren) they wouldn't need to send their babies off to nursery or kindergartenthe existence of kindergarten teachers is a sign of a degraded societyeven more so that society needs therapists. in a healthy society there are priests and pub landlords. therapy is an embarrassing pseudoscience.
>>201774094>my mate has lots of sex>this makes ME cool???
>this would work if he were talking about himself you imbecile
>>201774106nah didnt watch it as it was shite
>>201774086joe roagn trying to sell alpha brain door to door
*squeaks towards you*
>>201774121>I know what's really going on because I know people in the know who are chadsHow is that not bragging
>need a shit and there's a one hour work meeting about to startI'm going to poo myself during it
>therapy is an embarrassing pseudoscience.
>>201774157You're talking like I was letting you all know about my contact in the illuminati rather than a fucking flight attendant lol
>>201773829>>201773888Most male ones are gay but not all. I would never date a stewardess because they're guaranteed to be shagging around when they're flying.
Therapy is a load of shit to be fair. Remember reading about stockholm syndrome and how they came up with that. Police literally fucked everything up during a bank robbery and nearly killed the hostages, when one of them said the police were shit they decided they were mentally ill and had suddenly fell in love with the bank robber because they showed more concern about the hostages lives than the police.
Women seem a bit more turned on by exotic-ness and novelty than men are
Got an appointment with the lactation consultant later lads
There was a gay paki flight attendant wearing make up on the last flight I was on
>>201774175I look like that
>>201774268Might just be that they get more attention in foreign countries
What's for lunch lads?
Can’t stand it anymore ladsI’m going to move to some island in the med with my remote job, fuck this shithole
im out here straight thuggin this shit
>>201774306Nicotine pouch and a cup of tea
>>201774175why is his hair styled that way?
>>201774306Do you have one of those retard diseases where you can’t eat normal food
>>201774265Yeah?
>>201774306spicy seafood noodle soup
>>201774306Omelette and beans, same as every other day.
>>201774335you mean a palate?
>>201774306Isnt that the home packed food your teacher confiscated because it was unhealthly
want chinese friends
>>201774306Macaroni cheese with cauliflower prepared by the wife.
>>2017743064 chicken drumsticks2 satsumas1 cup of tea771kcal, 76g Protein, 37g Fat, 8g Carbs
hate when poncey cunts say noodle soup when its just instant noodles in water
>>201774393erm wo ai ni
>>201774409That's not what noodle soup is
just been arrested for being white
>>201774306instant noodles in water for me
Sucking a noodle soup
>>201774438How are you still able to post if you've been arrested? I call bullshit
>>201774438I see the BBC have resumed their daily reporting on the riot arrests>Woman charged for buying eggs
mossball soup
THE SUMMER CAN'T BE FUCKING OVER!!!*slams desk*IT CAN'T!!!
Dying for a vape but convinced myself I'm not addicted. Just need to last until tomorrow when I can bum my gf's vape.
>>201774393cao ni ma
>>201774456You're confusing being arrested with being in jail or being in prison. All different things
If you’re Jewish avoid @LBC today @mrjamesob is angry and asking Holly how many dead Palestinians she wants. The blood-libel of Jews as child-killers is back and alive on LBC like never before.
what's a job where I can shout at women all day?
>>201774456He told them he wanted to play solitaire on the computer
>>201774482No I'm not
time for a 5 o'clock tea with some biscuits and scones innit lads
>>201774476Friday and Saturday looking good at the moment mate, about 25C
>>201774489Primary school teacher
>>201774489taxi driver
>>201774511Don't let the russians know youre still in one position
>>201774476I teach a Master's course and September is the second best month for me, after December. Finally the students are gone and I have nearly a month's rest until the new academic year starts.
>Bristol Crown Court heard the defendant, who had drunk a couple of cans of cider, was swearing at police and also participated in chanting.lock him up and throw away the key
/brit/ supports Israel
>>201774561No I support Liverpool actually
>>201774561And by isreal I mean your mother
>>201774489>tries to bargainktim
>>201774590screaming
>>201774558Cheeky night out, ended with good story to tell down the pub and a nickname
>>201774558the words "Bristol" and "Crown" merged in my eyes and I read that as "Brown Court" at first need a rest
>>201774624Actually he got 18 months in prison and got shanked 3 weeks in by a brown man where he bled to death in his cell while the guards were shagging other prisoners.
anyone else afraid of spiders?always teiple check both my shoes before putting them on
>>201774668Well colour me brown and call me a dirty
Sharia Court
New>>201774724
Mumberg wants me to get some grated cheese and mushrooms to make omelettes later.
