bean_basics_(2).jpg edition
morning lads. Far too early to be up. Why are you here?
Activating my almonds
*visibly takes a step back because I am allergic to almonds*
made a devilishly witty post in another thread but no one has responded to it as of yet :\
>>202454094Just woke up from a massive nap.Reckon you don't really sleep when you drink innit
im insane
Well, /brit/?
My food plans for today:Breakfast: Toast with seriously strong cheese spread and orange juiceLunch: Tuna crunch roll with a cup of teaDinner: 14" Asda wood fire crust cheese pizza and a glass of ice cold water
>>202454190Keep us posted
>>202454190You have a very poor diet.
>cheese spread
Look man all bullshit aside, can I please just have some ass?
>The heavily decomposed corpse of a decapitated XL bully has been found in a shallow grave in a town in Worcestershire.
>>202454264
Had a really vivid dream about a zombie apocalypse and we all coordinated our defence on /brit/ except one lad who was trying to get us all killed
corr just shagged a birds arse in a legally consensual waynot one of you itt has shagged a girls arse period
never tried figs. they any good?
>>202454341been very clear that in the event of a foreign invasion, revolution or general uprising i WILL immediately become a camp kapo and betray anyone to ensure my own survival
>>202454367girls arse period is just diarrhea mate not something to be bragging about
>>202454367my ex once told me I was too big for anal.
>>202454379Naa they're weird and gritty and the gritty stuff is literally dead wasps.
>>202454397May we see your cock? Or perhaps a through the pants bulge pic?
>>202454379very tastey if driedaquired taste if fresh
>>202454476>May we se-*interrupts you*No.
>>202454397not good sign if your gf has an idea of whats to big for anal or notfilthy slagdodged a bullet thereshe probs talin it up arse somewhhere right niw
>>202454538cute pic genuinelyhe was alri in idiot abroad warwick
Alright guys? Got toil soon. Keep forgetting to take my antidepressants lately which could be affecting my overall mood and sleep.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JJOJS0ksGpUthis is very 11 years ago
Her bum's gone pooey.
Was surprised to learn that many women are under the assumption that men dab their urethra's with toilet paper after peeing
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KSlA7x98Yfw
>>202454653>Mood: 6>Energy: 4>Motivation:5>Testicles: 2
>>202454732used to do this as a kid probably why my willy is so messed upprobably dabbed poo on it
Waiting for all 4 of my dating apps to refresh
Stupid /brit/, be more funny!
Japan has fallen.
>>202454905Being homeless in Japan looks quite nice honestlyWould give a goWhy notSimple as
the willy is crying out to be wanked but I've already treated him once today
literally can not understand how people can work, I worked for one day and i'm quitting tomorrow, hellish stuff, I wasn't born for this
taking a nail clipper to the teeth
had a dream the canadian found my email address and sent me a message reminding me to pay my phone bill
>In a text message to her friend she allegedly said “I be stopping right before he dies. Last time he was blue.” Another message reportedly said: “I really wanna kill him but I don’t want to go to jail so. It’s unfortunate. He’s just gonna have to pay for his existence
>>202455113kill yourself pedophile freak
wassup
>>202454944Give tomorrow another try. Don't quit already.
>Mom kills her children then brings one with her to police station, Missouri cops say
>>202455270a rope, a rafter, a footstool
It's peanut butter jelly time
So, this is Rorke.
>>202455360surely not the one with the rainbow leash
are nectarines based yet?
>watching bloody champions league highlights (BBC)>they've only gone and got a tranny punditfucking FUMING
need to find a way to make neet income from my smelly bedroom, savings are running incredibly low
>>202455270disgustingmumberg confided in me whilst drunk that post-partum she was borderline mentally ill and considered throwing my little brother out a windowshe didn't thoughwomen are insane
>>202455377GRIMALDO
sex please
Waiting for toil to begin and the norms are having their boring mundane morning catch up
I tried to warn youBut no one ever listens to me>>202297427
I am bradley's udder lack of surprise
ST in da house
>>202455381approach a tv producer about making a reality show about neets
>>202455381sell poos to poo enthusiasts
feel like going for a drive but i'm 2 cans deep
I have never made love to a woman lads
Talk Tuah
had a dream that one of the women at toil made porn of herself and sent it to me, then in the same dream exberg was trying to get back in touch, then also that there was a third unidentified woman trying to chat me upabsolutely unfathomable in reality and woke up quite upset from the whole ordeal
>>202455573Now thinking about the Jewish proto-gf that could have been. She could have been my wife, probably. We could have had a nice life together...
>>202455583Yeah that type of fantasy dream is awful, far worse than a nightmare imo.
I had a dream MI5 agents browse /brit/ and know I watched this video on modified dreamshttps://youtu.be/EJTE80GuTRY?si=TABjwzJKejmnrrc7
>>202455608>fantasyI didn't enjoy a single part of that dream desu
dreamed about fucking twenty four year olds again
>>202455658Fucking NONCE holy shit
>>202455562go for a drive on the playstation then
LIVERPOOL
>>202455705ive got forza horizon 3 on my xbox x
>>202455705What cause I was wearing PlayStation shirt today?Gangstalking goons
>>202455718there you go, 3 is the aussie one isn't it?
feel rubbish todaybit snotty and too fat
>>202455731...yh
>>202455758he's just like me...
ummm kitten what the shit?
The theme of my niecestein's birthday was some poop. There are literally a bunch of coloured pictures of poops everywhere.What a fuck I never noticed this shit.
let me tell you chapsbeing awake for sunrise and sunset is so kinodon't have a sleeping pattern where you miss eitherit's the reason why youi're depressed
>>202455780what
>>202455780Young children entertainment has some weird noncey satanic obsession with poo these days for some reason
>>202455796
Like that video of a man shitting on a baby posted not long ago on /brit/Strange times indeed
>>202455787incompatible with modern life
TURN ON THE UFKCING NEWS RIGHT NOW THIS IS NOT A JOKE FUCKING TURN IT ON OH MY FUCKING GODDDDDDDDDDDDDDD
brazilian gf soon
>>202455811howling
I should just kill myself
where will it end?
>>202455825... this place was like bagdad with g strings
>>202455838I should more.
>>202455847>diversity of peoplerorke: eww gross!>diversity of font typesrorke: *soyjak face*
>>202455250Fuck no, queen elizabeth herlsef could come back to life and ask me to go there and I wouldn't
Favourite radio station lads?
>>202455866radio free europe
>>20245586697.2 STRAY EFFF EMMM
>>202455838The goonverment electronically harassing me and gigglygoonstalkers want me to so fucking badly lol
come here for a minute please >>202455877
>>202455866integrity 2.0
wearing a bit jumper today to hide my big flabby belly from all of yesterday's bread and cheese
wow a paranoid narcissistic american what a novelty
>>202455879and what is that captcha meant to say then
Would /shit/ recommend Clarkson's Farm?
>>202455891you fat bastard
how does one stop shohei ohtani?
>>202455866radio 6, although they do play an irritatingly high amount of wog music
>>202455884it's just a badly designed test made to make you overthink don't worry about it
brushing my teeth
>>202455904Nay 2 Hanging
>>202455825fukcing insane how hot the average white south american woman is
>>202455939just turned it on and they're playing some jamaican shite https://www.bbc.co.uk/sounds/play/live:bbc_6music
>>202455925I'm actually watching it right now, it's genuinely gooda small amount of it you can tell is staged but it's mostly just an interesting account of how difficult it is to run a farm
>>202455956are you sure it's not an affirming message maybe it says north americans, you're 2 hot
>>202455974kek see what I meannever used to be like that of course
>>202455992aint BBC R1 Xtra 100% black music? what's the need on putting black music on the other channelsbizarre
>>202455986Too hot to post in /brit/?Well I guess that's true...WAIT A MINUTE
"America is fucking DOOMED!!!" -British person
>>202456015It's mad that suburban soccer moms are the most powerful voters on planet earthThese bitches literally decide the fate of the planethttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mWawMg-alKs
>>202456034We should stop them before it's too late
>>202456000it's the BBC, they absolutely cannot go 10 minutes without reminding us all that blacks exist
If /brit/ formed a band LOL
>>202455576Americans are subhuman, one of their recent pop culture celebrities is some woman who talked about spitting on dicks and giving blowjobs on camera in the streetDon't know why the fuck you're all obsessed with her but she was on the news and was at ball games and now has contracts with other cancerous people and a podcastAll because she described the sound of spitting on someone's penisWhat a sick culture
>>202456132Chad and Soyjak memes date back unto antiquity
Former OceanGate operations director David Lochridge, who labeled the experimental submersible Titan unsafe prior to its last, deadly voyage, told Coast Guard investigators on Tuesday about a previous mission in which he clashed with CEO Stockton Rush that ended badly.Lochridge, who was responsible for the safety of all crew and training pilots, said he was the only qualified submersible pilot within OceanGate. Nevertheless, he recalled, Rush insisted on piloting a 2016 voyage using the Cyclops 1 vessel to the site of the Andrea Doria shipwreck.He said there were many system failures with Cyclops 1, and he was "phased out" after he embarrassed Rush by telling him that he should not pilot a sub.Lochridge said Rush took three people in a submersible to the wreck site of the Andrea Doria despite his warning, and wrecked the vessel before Lochridge tried to take the controls from him. Lochridge said Rush refused to turn over the controls until a client aboard shouted at him. He said Rush then threw the controller, described as a PlayStation controller, at his head.
>>202456157It was all fake Jewish nonce sense, honest!
>>202456157It's their Puritanism. They can't handle sex because it's evil so they have to distance themselves with unfunny "humour".Just look at Americans on 4chan, it's all the same imbecile.
>>202456224
>>202456157BASED>BASEDBASED>BASEDBASED>BASEDTRVKE>TRVKETRVKE>TRVKETRVKE>TRVKE
>>202456201im glad the ceo died as well in one of these cases of corporate manslaughter, normally they just get off scot free
>>202456246
>>202456157Say what you will but I'm looking forward to Jacob Rees-Mogg's appearance on Talk Tuah
>>202456269doxxable info
Going to be honest with you lads this scottish cunt is really starting to get on my tits.
Mousenonce or yanks You must choose
Too hot tbfShouldn't have worn my leather jacket
>>202456330alri james dean
fucking hate office chairs theyre made for midgets ffs
thoughts on the halal english breakfast?
>>202456364if it's halal it's not english
>>202456364
>>202456362Get a larger chair that fits you
>>202456405had one but i snapped the pivot arsing about on it lol
FightOrFight Or be destroyed
>>202456416Based fat bastard
got frasier on
You may be interested to know I'm on my way to the train station
want to die
Going to stop drinking til ChristmasGoing to stop eating shit til Christmas Going to stop spending money I don't need to til Christmas And then I'm going to really enjoy my Christmas
>>202456312Mousey any day
Continentals be like>mmmmm i love my maggot filled cheese Fuck off with that foreign slop ill stick to my English Mature Cheddar.
>>202455925soppy southerner shite
>>202456549You can buy continental cheese that doesn't have maggots in
>>202456364are those aigs in the tomato sauce
>>202456547NOOOOOOOOO
he's been posting cravendale for 8 calendar years
White people be like "if you dont want white bread with faeces rubbed on it, youre literally a brown poojeet curry muncher"
pls come to india and pls have sex with indian women
Ironic that hot women, so valuable, are reliant upon others pursuing them in order to realise that value. Hot women do not pursue men, they allure.
>>202455398After you were born she was post-fartum (because you're a lump of shit)
>>202456642but poojeets love shit in their food
>>202456635You can leave at any time
>>202455925Incredibly comfy
>>202456688I'll take a shit and I'll wipe my arse on your beard you fucking refugee
how's it /brit/'n lads?
>>202456717
>>202456661can you tell if someone is brahmin/kshatriya/dalit etc from their look alone?do beautiful lower caste people exist?
On the train me
Well good morning
>>202456661mad how she would be bleaching my genes
>>202456737Rorke blud... them socks with those creps? nah man's tapped
>>202456737Stop kicking the back of the seats you nasty little asbo
>>202456680incredibly hurtful words>>202456741it's friday eveningwhy aren't you out fucking and sucking?
coming to the conclusion I need to lighten up and stop being so negative
>>202456737good lad>>202456741ah... hello lad
>>202456736you generally can't tell. it has more to do with last name and/or dialect of language
>>202456762don't we all
ah, the gaystralians are here
The Tian Mingjian incident was an act of mass murder that occurred in Beijing, China on 20 September 1994. People's Liberation Army officer First Lieutenant Tian Mingjian first killed his officer and several other soldiers at his military base in Tongxian County and afterwards drove towards Jianguomen, where he continued his shooting spree and indiscriminately fired at people in the streets. Seventeen civilians, including an Iranian diplomat and his son, along with up to 11 soldiers and policemen were killed before Tian was finally shot dead by a police or military sniper.Tian Mingjian (Chinese: 田明建), born 20 September 1964,[1][a] was a first lieutenant stationed at an army base in Tongxian County, a suburb of Beijing. He had been in the military for over ten years, originally as a sharpshooter, and was highly skilled in the military technology field.It was reported that Tian had a quarrel with his superiors because they had forced his wife to have an abortion when she was pregnant with their second child, in accordance with China's one-child policy. Tian already had a daughter; however, as he came from a rural area in Henan province, where strong traditional values emphasise having a male child, Tian secretly planned on having a son until someone in the army revealed his plan and the birth control officer forced his wife to have an abortion. By then, his wife was already seven months pregnant and died during the operation along with the unborn fetus (later discovered to be a boy).
>>202456780do people ever caste-mix or is that still taboo?
I caste fireball!
>dialect of languagelmao they all go poopy poopy doopy poo in da loo no matter what
>>202456661would
Why are jeetas so thirsty for BWC? The western ones over here are literally voracious and almost predatory for white men
>>202456762good ladoff to the pub with you ASAP
>>202456806Sorry mate, racism outside of /b/Expect a knock at the door!
>>202456789crazy
indo european offspring shall inherit white anglo saxon countries
good morning lads it friday
we need British threads for British posters
>>202456798arranged marriages are based on caste. But love marriages don't consider caste anymore. Inter-caste marriage is very common
>>202456854Weekend starts in 10 hours
>>202456875what's the nicest part of india
forget flying cars and hoverboardsTHIS is the future we get
Learnt a lot from this article
>>202456854shall be on the whiskey sours from about 3 onwards
>>202456876Weekend? oh you mean the 48 hour countdown to toil
no luck catching them Hitler's bollocks then?
Don't know why you would go to all that effort to prepare beans yourself when you can get ready cooked beans in a tin for like 40p
>>202456913Don't think about toil when I'm not at itForget it the moment I leave the office or turn my laptop off
>>202456854>>202456908
Anglo sexo
>>202456927good lad
BROSShttps://i9.ytimg.com/vi/YVSnhxRuALs/hq720_custom_3.jpg?sqp=CMCxtLcG-oaymwEcCNAFEJQDSFXyq4qpAw4IARUAAIhCGAFwAcABBg==&rs=AOn4CLD2Uq6jBmyOddOio7cUJ-JtD_DBzA https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVSnhxRuALshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVSnhxRuALs
My bosy is fally apart
>>202456896the airport departure lounge as you're about to leave
Eggs beans bacon and waffles covered in honey for breakfast boys
>>202456961skibidi...
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YVSnhxRuALs BRUZ
>>202456968Twat
>>202456968Coffee and a brisk walk for me
>>202456896kerala, goa, maharastra, kashmir, pondicherry, northeast india. As developed or clean as southeast asia
>>202456968>and waffles covered in honeyyou just had to ruin it
>>202456986>pondicherryyou're welcome
don't eat breakfast me
>>202456968green tea and a niccy pouch for me
anyone wanna do a popin cookin with me ?
wanker wanking away
Emma Watson's toots smell eggy and pooey.
>>202457037a what
>>202456993You're missing out lad
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2fopl7-2wT0
>>202457052bloody hell that looks way too sweet to eat first thing
Proto bf is coming over later
>>202457052yankified twat
Really wish I'd thrown up last nightWould have felt much better this morning if I had done
>>202457052don't like waffles, don't have a sweet tooth
>>202457082I think your teeth are very sweet
can't eat a big breakfast mejust makes me want to sleep
Sam Pelligrino kosher lemon
No breakfastNo lunchBig tea
>>202457082>don't have a sweet toothgood (french)lad
>>202457095oh shut it
might have a couple of pints with brekkie
>>202457099likewise
>>202457137lad...
>>202457048a popin cookin
>>202457137phwoar
>>202457146nothing wrong with it, it's a german breakfast
>>202457146it's fridaybasically weekend
Abortion in China is legal at all stages of pregnancy.According to the UK newspaper The Daily Telegraph, a quota of 20,000 abortions and sterilizations was set for Huaiji County, Guangdong in one year due to reported disregard of the one-child policy. According to the article local officials were being pressured into purchasing portable ultrasound devices to identify abortion candidates in remote villages. The article also reported that women as far along as 8.5 months pregnant were forced to abort, usually by an injection of saline solution. A 1993 book by social scientist and anti-abortion political activist Steven W. Mosher reported that women in their ninth month of pregnancy, or already in labour, were having their children killed whilst in the birth canal or immediately after birth.
https://www.youtube.com/shorts/Y5DUPR75IYk
>>202456804
gf has metamorphisised into the ex-gfjust had a wank to some grim porn now that she's not about
every abortion should come with sterelisationif you are stupid enough to need an abortion, you shouldn't be able to breed
Jav makes me goon tf out and gets me Grinched out of my fucking mindI love that little yellow fuck machine Julia so much
>>202457205whatoh sorry to hear lad
(8) my girlfriend's a dick magnet (8)
>>202457228god isnt real
>>202457228shame yours is the wrong polarity
Had a dream that I and the Mrs stayed in a castle Air bnb owned by some count and it turned out he was a vampire that could come through the walls and eat you. Woke up as he came through the wall to eat me.
>>202457237hs?>>202457240loool
>>202457243see you tonight, la
>>202457243Ah no good, not a fan of those spooky dreams
drinking milk thats 10 days out of date and its still completely fine. those dates are a fucking joke
>>202457298dates on milk are "best before" not "use by"
>>202457298yeah depends on a few things -full fat, light or skim-temperature of your fridge Etc
>>202457312bit like your mum then
>>202457298that's nice hun I drink 11 days expired milk though *blows nails*
self insert movies where the blapeppo wins is their version of the news
did you know Bash, the most popular and widely used scripting language was created by a Black American?
https://www.msn.com/en-gb/sport/cricket/travis-head-makes-england-pay-with-superb-century-in-seven-wicket-australia-win
>>202457381never heard of it, can't be that popular
>>202457381about they started pulling their weight
>18-year old I'm messaging>30 year old me>42 year old messaging me
>>202457399Would need a fucking tow truck to pull your weight
alri
>>202457403wish you'd groom me instead >~<
>>202457381the best scripting language on a unix box is lipstick on a pigembrace lisp
>>202457393loved it
>>202457410i have been going to the gym recently so i'll take that as a compliment x
good for him i guess by the way or whatever you want to hear. keep it up
the word iconic is thrown around far too loosely these days
>lisp
been up all night again toby?
>>202457430so true, what an iconic post, we needed this
>>202457438shut the fuck up. get a life all day is just you trying to suck my dick. fuck off pissant
>>202457453bodied that nonce
>>202457453lol knew it. fucking freak, go to sleep
qrd on this toby person?
morning melty
>>202457465toby has just absolutely done you lmfao
>>202457453ignore them they're not worth it
>>202457470toby is mousenonce
>>202457472avatar/signature
Literally how does mousetwat never get banned
>>202457473hm i dont feel he has 2bh
>>202457484ah... oh
>>202457497he hotspots his phone to his laptop and doesn't use wifi
>>202457497he's been banned probably hundreds of times now
>>202457497mousey left ages ago this is just a tribute
>>202457532avatar/signature
How do you "eat" cancer? Are you Kurt Cobain? The only thing that faggot ate was 20 gauge birdshot.
toby probably has very poor sleep>feotid environment>energy drink addiction>4chan addiction >fucked in the head doubt he sleeps for more than a few hours at a time
>>202457497How does spaedo? Oh wait he does kek
>>202457574>toby probably has very poor sleep>>feotid environment>>energy drink addiction>>4chan addiction >>fucked in the head >doubt he sleeps for more than a few hours at a timeSpaedo projection
>>202457574he's speed running dementia. hopefully he'll be dead soon :)
never see a good post with a frog picture attached to it do you
>>202457639hum, yes you do, they're the best posts
you only live once so try to spend as much time on computer as it is possible
>it's a Bebe episodeyea, it's a good one
>>202457698>>202457698>>202457698
>>202457639You do when I'm around.