Sredni Vashtar edition
get the life arsed up and hated
I have a method in Japan of having a drink, then another, and another, and finally another, and instantly getting a shagFor Fuck Sake
poo smells lmao
Your own slice of London. Yours for not a penny under half a million quid.
>>203135239He stay positive all the way and that's lush x
gonna buy a car if I get this job
If they're anti-capitalists then why do they spend so much on makeup, wigs, designer clothes, flags and twitter check marks?
pooing in the call centre
>>203135285ford KA is it lad?
We are the seaside army.
>>203135273just fucked
>>203135303Cringelord
>>203135303he's not going to shag you mate
>>203135300might have to be, haven't seen one in years
>>203135326He probably would
literally in a flood of tears right now
>>203135363dmd u hun x
>>203135363yeah? you produced enough tears to literally flood your room did you?
smelly girl farts
Is Helen Mark’s gf?
Rorke shaking his fat gyatt for the rizzler ~
>>203135386carer
>>203135386they dont have sex and sleep in separate rooms when they've been away so im guessing not.
simps are subhuman
Scranning a french fancy
corr protogf sends a pic of her face as she is sitting in bed but makes sure to include the top half of her body in there too, making sure I can see the bra probably, but slightly covered by her hair. can't say anything or I risk fucking it up.
oh jeremy corbyn
>Broadcaster James Whale reveals his heartbreak after all three of his dogs die in just ten months
>>203135303a lot of trolls in here recently have forgotten that /brit/ is a SeasideARMY. Not us though deee lass. We're pro-SSM all the way and it 4x lush x
>>203135429>ruins it by not saying anything Fucked it mate
huge match in league 2 tonight, bradford city vs newport, doesn't get much bigger than this
seeing a lot of extremely low quality nonsense catchphraseshope they don't turn into advertising or begging or avatar use
>>203135433Something similar happened to me last year. Catberg one died in May (age 18), catberg two died in August (age 18) and catberg three died in December (age 11 with cancer and heart disease).I hate dogs.
>>203135443he's a vile ugly mutant
>>203135458genuinely don't know what I am supposed to say other than she looks good
Using AI right now to render white men obsolete
>>203135469yeah?
>>203135486"your looking pure fuckin sexy man"
>Something similar happened to me last year.
>>203135486Just say that in a non creepy way
>>203135480And what do your autism assesment notes have to do with it?
>>203135486"Holy Fuck, Holy Fucking Fuck, that body of yours is absurd"
would rather die a virgin that risk being seen as a creep overstepping boundaries
watching a retard struggle with a tv remote
Toillasses just spent 10 minutes looking at the team photos on some company's website and ripping all these normal looking blokes to shreds for no reason>He looks like a 40 year-old virgin>He looks like a paedophile>He looks like he has no friendsFucking hell women are evil
>>203135545how come they did yours three times?
>>203135545Sure they weren't browsing your Facebook profile mate?
>>203135545they said a lot about your photo blimey
The bald nonce is here
>>203135471>Catberg one died in May (age 18), catberg two died in August (age 18) and catberg three died in December (age 11 with cancer and heart disease).tough year
>>203135558rekt
I wonder if any women have killed their children out of jealousy from their husbands giving more attention to it instead of herself
>>203135558pmsl
Starmer simps are saying him getting rid of Gray is because he's ruthlessly 'getting a grip' of his administration like a political geniusWhy he would create such a problem for himself to resolve must, of course, be beyond all but the most thinktank'd wonks
*is needlessly rude to another poster*haha yes, I fit in!
>>203135558he's done
>>203135558>>203135569funny>>203135565not funny
>>203135573Your dad just get back from Tesco?
>>203135510>>203135524would like to say these and be extremely open about how I felt but reckon it won't work and comes off as too much>>203135515yeah, just have to say how beautiful she looks and not act like I'm actually thinking about shagging her when I see her like that
How do I apply to become a landlord?
how do working class bazzas even afford pints and cigs anymore?
>>203135558screamijng
>>203135624I think the queen has to suck you off or summat
>>203135577Yeah it was. The older cats you kind of expected them to go sooner rather than later but the last cat who went in December came as a shock. Think about all of them everyday. Got two new catbergs now and I love them too.
>>203135624Be Jewish or descend from Henry VIIIs Protestant thievesElse you can't
oh my days
>>203135641credit cards
>>203135641declared income of £24k while actually pulling 80 grand a year
>>203135654hope they die soon, freak
>>203135641Black marker baccy is a pretty big market these daysWith booze you just suck it up unfortunately, but there are some cheaper places for a pint. My local is still about 3 quid for a lager
>>203135668>£24k*£12,570
>>203135656Henry VIII wasn't a protestant nor are Anglicans in general
>>203135696Ah yes the English autism of their special apostolic church which has no apostolic connection
>>203135657leftypol turning a blind eye to this
toil in 2 hours. not even had breakfast yet. better get a wiggle on.
Mental how many small business owners and self-employed people get by on exactly £12,570 each year
>>203135619genuinely don't know how I'm supposed to tell her how much I want to fuck her when she's clearly interested, I get stuck trying not to come off as too lustful even though she will send lust provoking images and I can't believe she sends photos like that without her already knowing what she's doing
*faint whirring sound overhead*
mad how the catholic church is the church of Jesus Christ and the Pope is the earthly vicar for the Kingdom of Heaven
>>203135750tbf their other halves are on exactly £12,570 too
Day 365 of the 3 day antiterrorist operation
mumstein used to cut my hair into a similar style as tony montana and it looked really good on me, but i'm not sure what the style is called so i can't ask my barber for it, and i also don't want to ask for a tony montana haircut because they'll think i'm a spiv
I read this, what do you think of it?"Parasitic worms have been shown to regulate parts of the host immune system and thereby also to suppress allergic responses. Their disappearance from modern life has been linked to the increasing prevalence of allergies."
rorke: the formative years
when i was in secondary school, a rumour went around that I sucked my self off. Did damage to my already waning reputation.My fault though cos I went for a piss in a dark alley and said to the lads I was just off to suck my own cock, then I mimicked the action for what I thought was harmless fun. Anyways they all swore blind that they saw my knob go in my mouth even though it was pitch black and my back was turned to them.
I'm such a weak willed pussy
>Moment baker ruins an entire day's work of cakes after her shoe gets caught under a trolley and sends them crashing to the floor
>>203135726Not that anon, and you're right, but there are self-declared Anglo-Catholics within the Church of England, the largest C of E church in my city is one of them.
>/brit/ still being vile runtsI get it’s a bit of banter, but acting like this is not good for you and makes you a hate filled person. Remember the train lad incident? The train lad looked fine even if the reflection was a bit funny. It’s nice when people share a bit of real life, there’s no point trying to shoo every effort poster away. You couldn't really see his face clearly but he looked normal and he could have been quite attractive, he dressed well and didn't look like a slob, and why did it matter that I wore glasses? Most people here probably do anyway. I think we need some more kindness in /brit/.
>>203135795>gets gaza turned into a car park>aaaaaahhhh save me iran
>>203135762I always make it right up until the last cut where she's going like 120RPM, then I have to laugh.
>>203135800think there's bigger issues at play here if you're afraid of being judged by a man you pay to cut your hair
>>203135795Seems to be working sure enough
>Aussies above 50 are living longer, while younger people are suffering >Australian National UniversityBased Aussie boomers eating their young
>>203135831i did ask for it once and he arsed it up, it's not exactly the same style as tony montana but similar
>>203135832They've only captured something like less than 1% of Ukraine in a year lol
the jew fears the based and esoteric Iran
Diego, can I be an apprentice landlord?
think some of you lot should do this
>>203135823Staged video to use as viral marketing for the bakery (which she owns and has just started).It's all so tiresome.
>>203135823Crocs are not suitable footwear for any occasion
wish i could time travel to like 2009 and buy bitcoin
>>203135823good, fuck croc wearers
>>203135832Your AI is broken my post references Gaza
you would though
>>203135823how'd they slide off so easily. seems like shit design
GIBS ME DAT!
>>203135906She's well over the legal age so nothing wrong with it at all and if you disagree you're a moron.
>>203135895Your Bellingcat approved AI is broken, you posted Putin Monkey, but it didn't align with the keywords. Sort it out Pajeet
>>203135878>43
>>203135906wonder what she'll look like at 60, probably like that napoleon-looking lad from resident evil 4
>>203135906not for me, thanks.
>>203135893me? first 'erd about bitcoin on a minecraft podcast in like 2013, some fella had bought a tesla with bitcoindidn't buy of coursethen there was a bitcoin reference in family guy in like 2016didn't buy of coursec'est la vie
>>203135924Ok calm down matey boy
>>203135893bitcoin market is not even established in 2009you better mine yourself with lotsa cpu
>>203135929Big boobs at least
basically everybody i know bought a pizza with 15 bitcoins in 2009. why does everybody lie like that
>>203135942i knew about bitcoin in 2011 but i didn't have any money to invest with
for me its the cleaners from venus
>>203135926>PutinAhhaha
>>203135924That got lil bro heated
>>203135881Mmm yes a viral marketing video WITH NO VISIBLE BRAND
>>203135975like a couple of theirs
Live your dream on a run-down south east London council estate. Only 500 grand.
if you'd spend $10k (us) on bitcoin the exact day it was mentioned on family guy (january 2016) you'd now have just shy of $1.4 millionmental that
gfberg is a doctor, quite like the idea of her being able to leap into action to save me if i start having a stroke or a seizure or something
>>203135994>SE18very very very grim
How to use AI to earn money. Top earners using AI 2024. How to get money without working with AI. AI side hustle. What is AI
any feds in
>>203135991Leave the frogposter to nootice things Whatever keeps him from nooticing the state of his sorry existence
>>203135994This is all Thatcher's fault
>>203136016Fed deez nuts to ya mum
>>203135994I'd kill myself if I had to live in a terraced house, looks so grim
gopro is GONEhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T-PnRkUh84A&ab_channel=seasideMARK
>>203136014rorke's google history
>>203136011and sticking her finger up middle aged men's bums on a regular basis
HamarseHezbollocks
>>203135994The magic of the free market. If the product on sale is so unobtainable and unrealistic, then surely the price would adjust so the market can provide for everybody right?
>>203135878Genuinely sad and slightly mental
>>203135994Mad that if you lived there you could sell your house for 500k and then buy a northern mansion with plenty to spare
Mad how a fully detached house is an extremely high level thing to aspire to now
>>203136032gopro not for him. It may be for you, but it not for him
Yay my new book (Ruslan 2) is here. Well not technically new as I got it used for a bargain price. Good vocabulary here. Stress marks. Imperfect and perfect verbs listed. Looks great so far.
Sex is an addiction Always need more and better sex
>>203136064better off buying some land and building some of your own imo
I work for amazon flex when I'm not at the printworks tasting the paint
>>203136028better than a flat
>>203136028Youd probably have to share it with 4 other people
>>203136073go on dee lass. She learning Russian 4x quicker
>>203136073I use new penguin russian course. Am I wrong?
Nothing fills me with more dread than the idea that you mongs are walking around saying "catberg" IRL
corrr imagine what employed woman smells like after a long shift at the aldi
>>203136082Mmm yes I'll just buy an empty plot of land in who knows where and build a house
my dream is an underground househad it since i was a kidinstinctual desire, almost. harkens back to caveman times
>>203136106That's a man, mate.
>>203136111ktimsame with dogberg mumberg dadberg and toilbergthe berg consumes
so glad that I still live with parentbergs in a semi-detached and fairly big garden
>>203136111Oh no, people are calling their cats silly namesUtter dread
>>203136128could just live in a cave
>>203136073Ruslan's good, you get the CD with it?
>>203136134Ktim on 28k as wellI live like a lord
>>203136101I don't get itIs it because she's not buckled in?
>>203136123it's a genuine option if you aren't a pussy fuck
>>203136134>semi-detachedgrim
I think one of these might be Jewish
>>203136111dont say any of that nonsense, but I do say some SSMisms every now and then.
>>203136111call my dog dog
Haven't really paid attention since the election, presume everything is going swimmingly for Labour?
pon de floor
My grandad's cat was called Bossman
French people don't name their cats and dogs. They just call them "cat" or "dog".
>>203136111started using proto- as a prefix for many things
*charges into the thread*
>>203136163you're paranoid
>>203136180they are yet to be housed, fed or wanked, it's all gone tits up
>>203136111>Nothing fills me with more dread Really?
le chat est sur le table
leftypol uploading youtube videos and disabling dislikes and comments
you are so beautiful... to sneed
>>203136192What happens if they have more than one?
My ancestors were instrumental in the popularisation of concrete tower boxes that went up in the 50s and 60s and wrote some influential books on the awful designs you see on the outer walls like the one with little stones in. It was big in japan and germany too. You're welcome!
>>203136111I've introduced -berg into my family so now mum goes around saying 'catberg' and such
>>203136217la table
diet starts today
>>203136234Iz zis troo? >>203136192
>>203136236good lad
>>203136192Not true they have a very peculiar naming convention, something to do with the day you got your pet
We all Seaside in life x
>>203136106Thanks>>203136108I use that too. I have penguin, Colloquial and now Ruslan. I think Penguin is very good but some of the vocabulary is a bit dated.>>203136153No. Might be able to find the files online though.
will probably pirate Ruslan 2 online
>More than 450,000 people have been murdered and tens of thousands have gone missing across Mexico since the government deployed the army to combat drug trafficking in 2006.thats fucking crazy
>>203135273That's a pretty shit example of london £ to be honest500k gets you a one bed flat in primrose hill and no one is moving a family to walthamstow unless they are brownA white £500k looking to buy in london goes nowhere near this property
>>203136229T. Goldfinger
>>203136255No we're not all bloated obese dossers. The fact you aspire to this is ridiculous, anus licker.
At home, my dog is called dogwog
>>203136247Of course not. We call them "chat" or "chien".
This is what London is about
The Fishman of Bournemouth
>>203136304The Bournemouth look
dogbert
Always blows me away with how many younger people enjoy living in a flat and hate gardens. I fucking love having a garden and my own outdoor space.
ordered a Wendy's meal like i'm some yankCooking not for me today. It may be for you, but it's not for me.
Buying a plot of landDoing it upJust for the craic
Is this the best bodytype?
>>203136321What are you on aboutWhich young people are you talking to
>>203136321shut up nonce what are you 90 years old? go have a wank in your little runt shed at the end of the garden
Just found out croissants aren't even French. They're Austrian.Heads spinning a bit so I might need a lie down.
never going to own a house me, but a flat would be better than my current set up
>>203136321Don't have time to toil in the soil after toiling at the printworks where I taste the paint and then work amazon flex
>>203136321do you yeahbet you also enjoy wanking off men with your arse
when I was 16 I was completely spotless now I’m 21 spotty cunt
>>203136321can't be arsed maintaining a garden
>gardenI was born after 2000 so I will never own this
>>203136346Wow that means France needs a million more black immigrants
>>203136338Got weird stumpy dwarf legs. Reckon this girl can't be taller than 5ft
Need to go for a runberg but can't be arsed
>>203136364Austrians aren't black though
>it's 2007>elated because it's bangers and mash for lunch>go play footie in the fields>buzzing because it's art class in the afternoon so no real work>go back in and doss about until hometime>get home, grab crisps and capri sun >open laptop and play some RuneScape>billyboyyy98 has logged in>wahey your best mate Billy is also on>spend rest of day playing runey then off to bedtake me back lads, take me back
>>203136363all non-garden having houses need to be demolished. we aren't bees.
the implication your cat is JEWISH is sus
on that note, could never flatshare me. Would drive me to madness
bit of a walking antique me
>>203136390RuneScape was fucking shit and always was shit
I've got little balls and backne so I might as well get on the steroids
most under 30s are so incompetent and scared of grass that they literally shit themselves if left alone with a garden. insane. t. 27
>>203136386Explain David Alaba
>all non-garden having houses need to be demolished. we aren't bees.
>>203136410the grimest existence
>>203136390this except for me it was halo 3
>>203136422Couldn't be arsed with grass meWould just turn it into a paved garden with some raised beds
thoughts on living underground?
>>203136321Bought a flat with a balcony terrace over having a garden (lived alone, gf moved in)Deffo would have a garden when we have kids but no point now, outdoor terrace is fine
>>203136454alluring in the way a secret base or treehouse is when you're younglack of natural light would probably be pretty shithouse though
>>203136419t. fell for armour trimming scam and quit
>>203136452grass isn't so bad to maintain if you leave it fairly long, too many boomers got the idea that it needs to be trimmed way too short all of the time. slabs with plant pots is also very nice too.
>>203136478>lack of natural lightyou'd have to be pale to survive
heaven
went to a wetherspoons on saturday and ALL the bar staff were emo style e-girls. safe to say I will be a regular.
>>203136410tried flatsharing in uni, indeed went insane, never again
>>203136500where's the grass?
>>203136428>His Yoruba Nigerian father is a prince from Ogere who is also a rapper and works as a DJ.Nigerian royalty obviously can't be Austrian
>>203136365
>>203136502In your mind you're as good as married to them
rorke recreating his minecraft factions secret base in his garden
Became a feminist when I realised all the popular incel "All women are whores", "Men are always betrayed", "Based man wrecks slut" viral content are always posted by Khaleds, Faisals, Rajeshes, Sanjays, Jamals, Shaquilles, Pedros, Miguels. Everything about the Andrew Tate, Nick Fuentes type gender war has only succeeded in unifying various shades of brown men in demonic hatred of white womenSorry but I actually love white women, smelly ethnic incels are no brothers of mine
>>203136510He's Austrian on Fifa but
Bit warm innit18 degrees in OctoberFucking pisstake
>>203136523sounds great
leftypol playing on his old ipod touch he found in a shoebox under his bed whilst cleaning his room
I can't be sure but I'm quite certain I'm currently sitting in a spoons in Great Yarmouth with Kylian Mbappe
>>203136533rorke is typing...
>>203136365So that's a yes.
>>203136548Check under the table
>>203136507know a few people who were doing it into their 30s like they're the cast of friends or somethingbaffling
just occurred to me that I will never ever have sex
>>203136548what's he drinking?
>>203136502where
rorke being invited over for sexarse and disassembling the protogf's bed in a random act of bed wars
How am I supposed to maintain a garden while working a 60 hour week (which we are all being psyopped into doing) and working out to elite athlete level (which we are told to do) while learning a foreign language (which we are encouraged to do) while raising two children and looking after a dog (which we are expected to do by wifey) all while running my side hustle of smoking salmon in my garage (which I need to do for linkedin)
>>203136580wetherspoons
>>203136527Based. Hang incels. Burn trannies. Deport wogs.
>>203136571must be hard with all the peng tings about in russia
>>203136365Yeah she's 4'10
>>203136589ahahaha
>>203136576Guiness. There are also 2 empty Aspall cider bottles.
>>203136533It was 25c on this exact day last yearI remember it because I went to the football in shorts and t-shirt
This... This is EuropeA tool company has received permission to demolish part of a 6000 year old monument to build a shopArchaeologists found no significant artefacts in the area so the government approved the demolition
Going to start dressing smarter. I’m 30 now. Time to put things into perspective. I can’t wear trainers and trackie bottoms anymore. It’s time to put a little effort in. Shirts. Trousers. Nice shoes. No more polyester and synthetic cheap clothing. Only natural, long lasting materials for me. Wool. Cotton. Linen. Clothes made in the UK, Europe at a push. Yes, they’re more expensive but they’re better quality and last longer. Quality is the key. If my clothing looks robust then I’ll feel and look more confident and respectable and this echoes through every aspect of my life. Time to get a move on. Dark Academia. Watch. Smarten myself up. Clean shaven. Always. If I respect myself, others will respect me. That comes through how you present yourself initially. Time to get a move on. Time to lay off the weed, apps and wanking. Have a shave. Get your haircut. Wash your penis. Stop drinking fizzy drinks. Stop eating junk food. Stop watching porn. Stop spending so much time on the internet. Stop going to bed so late. Read more. Exercise more. Get a green tea in me. A walk. Fresh air. Sun. The gears turning. The muscles pumping. The blood flowing. The computer off. A language learned. A hobby enjoyed. An instrument played. A clue gained. Eat at a local restaurant tonight. Get the cream sauce. Have a cold pint at 4 o’clock in a mostly empty bar. Go somewhere you’ve never been. Listen to someone you think may have nothing in common with you. Order the steak rare. Eat an oyster. Have a negroni. Have two. Be open to a world where you may not understand or agree with the person next to you, but have a drink with them anyways. Eat slowly. Tip your server. Check in on your friends. Check in on yourself. Enjoy the ride.
>>203136615he drinking cider on his own is he?
>>203136621ahahaha
>>203136634adam's active
>>203136548What does it say on the back of his shirt
>>203136629Maybe but I went to the toilets and there were some legs visible under the cubicle that could be attributed to Karim Benzema.
>>203136634mornin' spaino
>>203136634>her fanny still sore from last weekendOn the hack with horseberg was she
any homo erectus man in?
>>203136621screaming because I actually started to think like this, still got a few years until 30
>>203136619those french stones in the picture, they already knocked down and pillaged tons over the years. It used to be a really really big creation.
>>203136634Based Timmy for pounding Katy's fanny with his gigantic BWC
Desperately need to trim the old cock, balls and arse but I cannot be arsed.It's winter soon so I need the warmth. Not like anybody is going to be seeing it anyway.
>>203136619This post radicalised me.
>>203136674>frenchBretonFuck off Greek
A go staat dress smarter. Mi a 30 now. Time fi put tings inna perspective. Mi cyan wear trainers an trackie bottoms no more. A time fi put a likkle effort in. Shirts. Pants. Nice shoes. No more polyester an synthetic cheap clothing. Only natural, long lasting materials fi mi. Wool. Catton. Linen. Clothes mek inna di UK, Europe at a push. Yes, dem more expensive but dem better quality an last longer. Quality a di key. If mi clothing look robust den mi ago feel an look more confident an respectable an dis echoes through every aspect a mi life. Time fi get a move on. Dark Academia. Watch. Smarten miself up. Clean shaven. Always. Ef mi rispek miself, ada piipl wi rispek mi. Dat come chruu how yuh present yuhself initially. Time fi get a move on. Time fi lay off di weed, apps an wanking. Have a shave. Get yuh haircut. Wash yuh penis. Stop drink fizzy drinks. Stop eat junk food. Stop watch porn. Stop spen so much time pan di internet. Stop go a bed so late. Read more. Exercise more. Get a green tea inna mi. A walk. Fresh air. Sun. Di gears dem a turn. Di muscles dem a pump. Di blood a flow. Di computer off. A langwij weh yuh laan. A hobby weh yuh enjoy. An instrument did a play. A clue gained. Eat at a local restaurant tonight. Get di cream sauce. Have a cold pint at 4 o’clock inna a mostly empty bar. Go somweh yuh neva go yet. Lisn tu sumadi we yu tingk maita no av notn in kaman wid yu. Order di steak rare. Eat an oyster. Have a negroni. Have two. Be open to a world weh yuh might not understand or agree wid di person next to yuh, but have a drink wid dem anyways. Eat slow. Tip yuh server. Check in pan yuh fren dem. Check in pan yuhself. Enjoy di ride.
>>203136679Used to actually be insecure about this with hair on the balls or willard, but realise that women don't really seem to care.
>>203136696What's happening at the Gherkin
>>203136649Lonsdale
long weekend almost overthat was a quick one
>>203136634ready for your next 16 hour shift alone? x
>>203136713Nothing, it's just offices
>>203136687they lost, get over it
>>203136696so she spent a weekend at a london office building that was practically empty because it was the weekend and all the workers were off?
>>203136734Brother, your mum fucks an Algerian
>>203136717Not him then is it you pillock
>>203136748more likely to happen to a breton, they're massive leftists
>>203136764Frenchwomen of all stripes shag 'em
>>203136764No we aren't
it's lush
>>203136679tried to shave my balls yesterday but got tired halfway and now there's a giant bald spot on my pubis
>>203136757Why not?
baffled at the thought of an actual russian possibly posting here
making a Spotify playlist for the protogf so she falls in love with me and begs me to fuck her
>>203136817Are you really
New>>203136841
I hate the 'Katy' meme because that particular spelling of Katy is horrid and yankified low-iq zoomerslop compared with 'Katie' which is the proper way it is spelt
>>203136839somewhat yesfeels like post 2022 it shouldn't happen even though there's no logical reason it can't
>>203136780More than anyone else.
