apples
poo smells hahaha
>>203780257so fucking red they look like tomatoes hows that happened
This is what you crave
feel so bad for everyone around the world
How does a 50 something farmer manage to catch a 17 and 22 year old and tie them up?
must be boring being a spider just sat in the same place all day and moving for maybe 1 minute when you eat through the day
>>203782394once bought just "seasonal British apples" from Tesco and they were red all the way through like thishonestly it's shit like this that had our ancestors believing in witches
>>203782426In America we have bred them to be white on the inside and flavorlessI don’t know why
>>203782426mate thats a radish
>>203782423haha yeah imagine
>Shaken Leland HornbyOdd name
remember when they used to clone sheep, what was that all about?
>>203782423wtf am I a spider
>>203782447how about you breed your women to be white on the inside for a change>>203782451nah it's a reddish
Girls just wanna have fun
>>203782426it looks nicedid it taste good?
>>203782488How do we know it’s a clone. Sheep all look the same to me. Could’ve just been another sheep
>>203782488dolly mentioned>>203782515yh, sweet but a little off-putting
>>203782528maybe, I reckon it went all hush hush so they could start on humans
How do I acquire an English gf (girlfriend) friends?
>>203782584why would you want that?
>*enters /brit/*
>>203782584you're better off finding some gullible thirdie then shipping her here on a dinghy
smonking weed i found on the carpet aha
when men lie together in lust, it's corrupting, but when men lie together and knowledge and virtue are passed between them that is pure and excellent.when they compete to bring out the best in each other, this is the love between men that can build a city state and lift us from our frog pond.
wish i had a family that loved and cared for each other but instead they all hate each other and i hate them
How many of you live by the tenets of stoicism
live by the tents of stoicism, methey keep asking me to leave but I won't
both my greatest weakness and my greatest strength is that i'm absolutely incredible at doing fuck all
>>203782562wonder if anyone decided to squeeze her thighs insteadid rather do that
>>203782593Because I want one
>>203782488saw dolly at a museum in edinburghthey have her on a spinning platform for some reason
live by the can of tennents
>>203782562she couldn't really do this in central london or birmingham
>>203782740>they have her on a spinning platformfucking kek
>>203782740science gone mad
Shame on anyone who uses black language as a jokeSo passè
what was it you thought would happen
>>203780257Beautiful apples
>>203782740
>>203782785do you have apples in russia
I'm a 23 year old virgin
>>203782825its over for you
>>203782825many such cases
>>203782825did you go to uni? impossible to go to uni and not shag
>Please wait for the timer>or verify your email address before making a post.>Click here for more information>or to verify your email.>900 seconds (15 minutes (.25 hours (~1% day)))
need to poo
this is my life today
>>203782865going to take the slow thread as an opportunity to let you know that no-one will ever care about this and you can just stop doing it now
i'm on a one-way line
mad how I have a decent face but an incredibly good body thanks to being a NEET gymcel which most guys would do anything for but I never leave the fucking house and nobody else sees it, probably have massive shagger potential that I'm just throwing away
>>203782695same but never fuck at all
>>203782852knew a lad who went to uni and was still kissless by the end
>>203782943hehehe
braaaaaaaaaaaaaaaap
>>203782852It really isn't, brotherberg didn't get shagged and still hasn't at 25
just pay the black people billions rorkeand keep letting them into the countryits the only right thing to do
if you could only poo or wee for the rest of your life, which one would you choose?
>>203782988i dont know what to say
No friends No gf Don't even talk to my parents, just give them one word answers or ignore them completely
>>203783046let your thighs do the talking big fella
>>203783055k
>>203783036pisspooing is a chore and can be a problem in social situations
>>203783036Wee, takes too long to poo
>>203783055ktimgrandparents have stopped trying to communicate to me
>>203782955>>203783021genuinely shocked by this. did they live at home? I don't know anyone who lived in halls at uni and didn't shag
>>203783055FOLC
>>203783036obviously wee
>>203783095No
CAMI'S GOT HIS CHAPPY OUT!CAMI'S GOT HIS CHAPPY OUT ON ONLYFANS!just thought you might like to know
rorje......
i shagged 3 individual girls during uni, 1st one in freshers week relieving me of my v plate
>>203783079poo a lot in social situations do you?
>>203783095>did they live at home?aye he did, but he was also about 5'8" and weighed no more than 8 stone and had ginger curly hair and wireframe glasses and was generally very ugly, God bless him. Also very obviously never really went out at all. Only reason he ever made a single friend through uni is because we got paired up alphabetically at some point in first year and I'm a nice lad. Too nice for my own good, quite frankly.
look like a less handsome version of penn badgley meat least i'm taller than him
>>203783140usually when a stimulant enters my system yes
>>203783163man's name is literally just nouns
Might move to Vermont.
>>203783204all names are nouns
>>203783141Yeah?
>>203783163No clue who that is
>halloween games tomorrow afternoon at toil>one of the forfeits is to put your toes in sticky toffee and the loser has to lick it offwhy is everything sexualized and degenerate now? i'm the only person in the office that seems to think this is weird everyone else thinks its funny
muttering under my breath about black people while walking behind women at night
my name?*panics and looks around for inspiration**notices your shirt pocket*Pen... Badge...ly
27 years old, lived at home forever, no chance I'll ever shag
>>203783213can't imagine being so narcissistic that you actually post something like this
>>203783239spreaking
like how women have breasts and have to wear bras
>>203783247ill shag ur arse if u want
>>203783141never stood a chance poor fella
>>203783247KTIMI have shagged, though. But never at home.
blakeney
>>203783133>Well, your story is very compelling, Mr. Jackass, I mean Anon. So I'll just type it up on my invisible typewriter.
>>203780257Gimpy Americans walking round with their "I Voted" sticker
>>203783225I feel like this is bullshit, can't see a workplace doing that. >everything sexualized and degenerate nowIt's so tiring, it's everywhere.
>>203783262i have to wear boxer briefs otherwise my bollocks start flopping around and chafing against my legs
>>203783213based on her middle finger i can diagnose that shes prone to heart problems
>>203783163had to google this lad and it turns out i've been compared to him no less than twice before in my life, both times a girl I'd just met saying I remind them of "the fella from You". Who I learned is a stalker/rapist/murderer. So that's great for me. Think it was just cuz of my hair and beard at the time though.
>>203783213that bitch has heart disease
>>203783239Family Guy did it first
>>203783225that's grim
Quite mental how obsessed some lads are with height Nothing else to add, just an observation
>>203783225This is your chance to lick toilfu's toes.
>>203783311>Family Guy is an American animated sitcom created by Seth MacFarlane for the Fox Broadcasting Company. The series premiered on January 31, 1999>Penn Dayton Badgley (born November 1, 1986) is an American actor and producer.false
>>203783302>>203783308reddit fact
>>203783225Do you work at a sex shop?
>>203783313short men are the most oppressed group in society
>>203783205Vermont is nice but expensive and it’s full of people from out of stateNew Hampshire is a bit beat up but cheaper and more authentic
>>203783339no i work in marketing with insufferable girl bosses
>>203783307yeah women love that character, just goes to show you can get away with being a murderer and a total perverted creep if you're handsome
>>203783339nah, sticky toffee shop
>>203783331>>203783225would be a right laugh if you lost deliberately so you could put your lips around toilfu's toes and make sure to suck off all of the toffee haha
what the FUCK is wrong with Japs?https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KtqztsI5ZxM
>>203783299yeah well theyre not so nice no offence but theyre all wrinkly and hairy
>>203783273his personality didn't help matters tbf. always talking about comic book movies and when i got into a relationship with the qt in the wee friend group, he started making constant comments about being lonely and how he'll never find happiness or a girl to love him.
>>203783062i shaved my thighs just for this pic. i hope you're happy you turbo batty
>>203783354Oh well that sort of makes sense, all about sucking and fucking isn't it, marketing
>>203783368haha wooops
>>203783378can't make head nor tail of this
you office drones wear compression socks rightdon't want old clotberg to get you one day
>>203783378mate i can see your vagina
>>203783378Why's one so much bigger
>>203783225I would complain to HR just to be a spoil sport
>>203783378what the fuck am I looking at
>>203783363it's just like peep show. I've known a few yank women who love the show and have some britisher attraction. they all think mark is grim but they love jeremy and super hans, even admitting that they are shit people, but they've explicitly told me that they'd let them do anything to them if they were real.
err
>>203783363i'll have to investigate if this is true the next time i get compared to him or serial killers in general, which has also happened fs. must be smething wrong with my face.
mrs called me the fella off of You for wearing a black baseball cap, which she told me to buy
ended up fucking off my chores list and doing some gardening instead
>>203783427I never sit down normally anyway, always shifting my legs around
>>203783444that reminds me, i need a black baseball cap. the one i bought before was one of them unisex ones and doesn't fit my massive dome.
>>203783439*enters brothel*OIWHERE'S YER FOCKIN' POPPY>>203783453FOY
>>203783444Are you balding?
>>203783444balding yeah
>>203783225Work with a fag, ALL his jokes were sexualised
I think if I started balding that would be what tips me over the edge into suicide.
>>203783489FOY off
>>203783444i've got a similar one except it's got the jurassic park logo on it, but get this, the "jurassic park" is spelled in japanese
>>203783480>>203783484probably yh but that's not why, it's for dog walks
>follow a white supremacist on twitter>He's only gone and got a Mexican gfwhy do the yanks do this every time?
cant get over how ugly asians are, might have to put them on par with indians
Royal mail taking the piss today
>>203783476explain how that makes me a yank
>>203783513prefer a flat cap for dog walks, looks better with my barbour
Balding is kino
>>203783511ohh jurassica parku
It's over for Sir Queer
>>203783514yeah?
>>203783537slaphead cope
>>203783522There's such a low amount of attractive Asians honestly
>>203783535I already get asked "where do you shoot?" because I have a fieldline lab that isn't overweight, can't be cutting about in the uniform too
>>203783587Chat shit
>>203783522the parents are fine but that is one ugly girl
>>203783588Scheisse-Ausfahrt
>>203783588top one
>>203783522-_- hawwww
>>203783588first one
i love big boobies
>>203783587starmer is the new bane releasing all the prisoners for a revolution
>>203783514She’s cute
>>203783610>the parents are fineare you blind
interesting how the darker coloured dogs and cats, black and browns, are always quite nice and better looking than the lighter coloured animals. the opposite of humans.
>>203783587Lucy Letbygones be bygones
Good
Sir Keir Karma
>>203783588Top one VGHHHH
>>203783643
>>203783643what a coincidence i love big willies
>>203783654Golden retrieversYou’re a mong
>>203783588
>>203783654now thats not true is it light cats and dogs are just as pretty
>>203783654counter-point: yellow labradors
>>203783669She's just put oil on her tits
stayin’ on bzns, as they say
>>203783562stop stalking me you FREAK
>>203783642>>203783632fuck off nazi scum>>203783681>>203783685>>203783686yellow labs/golden retrievers are the yank soy male choice
>>203783699*slams my fists on the desk*AS SHE SHOULD
>>203783701It’s standing
serving CUNT ova heya
Lads I have to apologise, I made an error in a previous post.>>203782350This wasn't a weedy bloke as i had thought. It's actually this thing:https://www.rainbowjews.com/equality-champion-linda-bellos-proud-to-be-an-african-jewish-lesbian-feminist/Imagine my shock.The original interaction for contexthttps://x.com/LBC/status/1849426427336179933?t=PLuXIMA2A4B88pG7x7dh0A&s=19
>>203783732yeah?
>>203783726trolling outside of /b/yanks have big fat chocolate labs they call a heckin chonker and dress up on holidaysan athletic yellow lab with a pheasant in its mouth is as British as hating foreigners
https://youtu.be/Cl_JpCSvTpk
From practically self-financing Pop 2 to everyone in the industry wanting a piece of Brat. I couldn't be more proud and amazed by this woman's artistry.
>>203783652guy looks fine, mother is a bit plain but seems like a good womanbetter than the average brit i reckon
>>203783699a regular sherlock holmes here
>>203783726The question is asking what is NOT part of Germanyif they're saying the top one then they're agreeing that Alsace-Lorraine is not German territory
>>203783804you must be ugly as fuck
>rainbowjews.com
practising my hgv theory, can't wait to start murdering prostitutes
>>203783820nah, grandma says i'm handsome everytime she sees me, waitresses beam up when they see me
>>203783804They're munters mate
>>203783865man causes people to invent sci-fi methods of teleportation to get away from him and he doesn't think he's ugly
>>203783861would be shit scared of causing harm in anything bigger than a car so won't go near any type of truck or van, don't trust myself
>>203783857>lottery funded
>>203783861I have referred this post onto the DVLA, hopefully they will be able to use your score and the approximate time at which your results were accessed to prevent you from harming women
Sir Vape Snatcher
rodents are so cute
>>203783899so they're funded for their work in preaching for more funding, to the tune of £18 trillion. love this country.
anyone else wank to blacked but not an interracial cuck?I just think the scenes and actresses are hot
>>203783842SHEAREDRAW
>>203783889I think I'm a safe driver (don't use my phone)>>203783912>women
Charlie Veitch meets leftypol and his missushttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Hf4RUPb4rjc
>>203783941no. they are evil. ive killed 2 rats in my garden this month. hate them. still another rat bastard in my garden and will be resetting my traps to destroy them.
remember when a yellow car would drive past and you'd punch your mate? dont see any of that sort no more
My penis is bulb shaped
>>203783990That's because the car is now gangstalking you and we no longer have the ability for such silliness
>>203783981i like watching videos of them sleeping or playing together
>>203783990Now it's all about wearing Japanese schoolgirl dresses and being convinced to take hormones by predators on discord. part of me hates but part of me wishes Iw as 5 years younger so I could get prime teen bussy. woke gone mad
soogs is so fucking fit, janny has shadow banned all my images of her puffy nipps
>>203783977howling at those black lads at the start
any recommendations on what to get the twink bf for his 40th birthday lads?
>>203784047Corneto
don't you hate it when a guy fingers your pussy after eating hot sauce
>>203784044shes a filthy trollop
>>203784069Does that explain the potent fish smell?
>>203784069quetiapine down the hatch
wool jumper collection begins
taking vitamin D supplement
big day tomorrowin my culture it's the day reserved for relaxing after work with some beers and maybe even a fast food item or two
deary deary me
spicy beans on toast for luncheon
>>203784145which British county is Smith County, Texas in again?
>>203784145leftypol turning a blind eye to this
>>203784044don't respect any woman who shows her vergina and bob on the internet
>>203784160When America sharts, the world farts
>>203784145sheeeiit
living in absolute torture from my rented flat in sunderland
>>203784213porridge?
sucking a pickle
>>203784213uh north east has the lowest rent in the country (middlesborough especially)grow the fuck up
gonna plan a triphong hong then phillipines then australiajust need someone to go with
>>203783977urban decay is out of control man
>>203784234yeah rent isn’t my problem
>>203784238c..can I come?
>hong hong
Brighton and Perfidious Albion
>>203784130that reminds me i should get mine in aswell
>>203783977mad how annoying blacks are
>>203784238I see your planin order to blend in in Australia you first need to learn Mandarin (hong kong) and lose your virginity (phillipines)
>>203784213north or south of the river de lid? i bet south
>>203784145https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yy6q93ZLBZUbrothas on patrol
>>203784274What noise does a retarded car horn make
Mong Kong
>>203784213just move then nigga
>>203784311stick an ear to your mum's bedroom door to find out
>>203784329I don't get it
>>203784282Just kids messing about
>>203784349yeah you wouldn't tbf
>>203784349that's where his mum keeps her retarded car
>>203784145oy vey
>>203784356They're about 34, greeknonce.
off to the food jobber. anyone want owt?
odds pancakesevens french toast
stalking the protogfs and making them spotify playlists with songs related to obsession which they aren't supposed to see (knowing they'll check) so I'm like one of those TV show stalkers and they can't let me go because they've never felt so desired before (even though it takes minimal effort but looks like high effort on my side)
>>203784444Ok mate...
>>203784452alri penn badgley
>>203784044so true
>>203784474seems to be working, what I'm going for x
Sargon of Akkad is back on Yt Livestream lids.U.S. Election content anon
A Cock-jerk Whore-minge
>>203784145would love to watch this chud vs the cronem
>>203784270surebut first,are you a sexy girl?
world's oldest human being was 5 at start of WW1 and 9 by its conclusion31 at start of WW2 and 37 at its conclusionso WW1 vets do NOT exist and WW2 vets will cease existing by the late 2030s.
>>203784521Not yet
Wish the world was a bit coolerLike 10 degrees fahrenheit on averageLove cool chilly breezes and big long wool coats
>Get offered a job>"Please provide 3 references"Sick of it. Just because I'm a shut in billy no mates doesn't mean I can't do a job. I have 1 reference and it's my old job that I was at for nearly 5 years.Back to the benefits queue for me I guess.
>>203784535>all womenIt not right.Men just work to death, or die in some horrific war.
>>203784535imagine being ethelyou watched all of your children and most of your grandchildren die
>>203784555Once missed out on a job because my references wouldn’t pick up the goddamn phone when they were called
>>203784535They find new holocaust survivors every year
>>203784555stop being a defeatist bitch and just use that thenthat's a pretty solid reference and I doubt they'd care
love a bit of minge
>>203784584only brit remaining who was alive during the reign of Edward VII (Queen Victoria's son)
>>203784484just asking for it, stupid whore
>>203784535that person is unlikely to be that old. birth certificates weren't really a thing then so they just rely on self-reported birth dates (which upon investigation are often wrong).
>>203784584The dearest hope and wish of all living life forms
>>203784310silly bitch decides to run and trade a fine for probably years in prison
>>203784599yeah?
i'm the former youngest person
i should be led to the north and locked away to await the end of the world
>>203784633Don't you dare go hollow
>>203784535>and WW2 vets will cease existing by the late 2030sgrimhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NAaAd7zTSG4
time for a spot of clunge
>>203784598Literally can't submit the form unless it has 3 references filled out mate
>>203784656just enter "refer to above" or something
>>203784656Grim. I became NEET from toil almost 18 months ago. Didn't keep in contact with any of them at all. Exchanged numbers on the last day but never actually sent them my number. Embarrassing, I probably should have. Just totally disconnected myself from everyone and now I know nobody outside of my immediate family. Wonder how I'll get references now since this will be my situation soon.
>>203784555>Sick of it. Just because I'm a shut in billy no mates doesn't mean I can't do a jobknow this feel, I can't even renew my passport. my last toil took like a month of haggling just to get in. it ended poorly so no references from there either ffs
do you think they watch the thing in antarctic research stations
pancake was ok but a bit burnedgoing to have another
>>203784599Not a common opinion around here
some of you are in dire need of gaining a clue
>>203784741would be comfy
some of you are in dire need of minge
when the protogf finally removes the lads initials next to a heart in her instagram bio, you just know you are gonna shag
>>203784535lieutenant simpson take a nap, you're no good to us cranky!
>>203784729iktfCan't get a passport without references from doctors or lawyers or some shit
>>203784774I reject your clue. I only wish to hear the clues of my heart.
>>203784828did she remove his cum out of her bum
>>203784741McMurdo looks really comfyIt’s also quite big
>>203784843>>203784843>>203784843
some of you are in dire need of cluedo
Don't use that retard's "baddiedem" threadFuck off
>>203784844she's a virge, new relationship didn't last long x
