Budget edition
wtf she just said 4chan jannies are getting a pay rise
all budget discussions belong on /pol/
They're slashing your bennies :')
> JUST IN: Reeves to announce 64bn for gooning rehabilitation and recovery
air fryer tax
>>203996284100% increase, mad that
£10bn for sex arses for immigrants
got a friend who's just a complete retard with moneyspent 19k on a car he doesn't need when he was on a temporary contract and now he has no job
wtf shje just said state sponsored girlfriends for incels will increase growth by 1.2% by 2026we're so back lads
economic inactivity, that's you lot
they should give me £1bn as a giggle
>12bn for initiatives to encourage foreign workers to fill vacancies lol
>>203996334I'm on strike
>government pardon for purple akipretty based
>Reeves announces the so-called “Timmy Tax” which will see men with a penis size under 7 inches pay income tax rates up to 90%IT’S OVER
>>203996334No pussy no work
This is the longest I've ever listened to a woman speak. Don't recommend it.
>>203996334Ummm actually I work 6 hours a week cleaning the bins at ASDA
MIGRANT WORKERS TO FILL RACHEL REEVE'S GAPING BLACK HOLE
>>203996356telling on yourself like this :skull:
>>203996355lmfao what a loser
Once again Labour spread the cheeks and ram cock in fucking arse
>100% income tax if you're a straight white male
Is there a budget for the mandem?Stone Island jumpers these days are finna expensive, we're losing our culture if we can't get the latest garms
>>203996370looooool
>>203996324do aussies buy their cars outright?
>All energy created from solar farms to be used to provide free electricity for asylum seekers and those on benefitsFucking hell lads
Reeves announces a migration stimulus fund where every person of working age who arrives in the country gets an automatic £1,000 to go towards getting on the job ladder.
I don't drinkalcohol4
How much was that deficit?? £120bn?? Did I hear that right?
twenty twenty twenty
they are pricing rock bottom inflationif there's an inflationary shock we're fucked
900 TRILLION FOR ARE NHS£1 FOR EVERY CLAP DURING COVID
switch this off and get the gyaldem blind baking stream watched
>14 billion pounds stimulus to bring the sneaker game back from the deadnuff a dem know i'm glad i stocked up on them jordan 4s me prefer
>BAME workers under 30 will have a 5p National Insurance cut to incentivise work
more centralisationmore boe influencehigher taxestruly the worst timeline
>>203996386that’s now how you use “finna”
100% INHERITANCE TAX
>>203996411TWENTY TWO TRILLION BILLION POUNDS!
>Office for Value For Moneyoh brother
my mum is already struggling to feed her 29 year old son what are the government going to do about this
>david goldstein
>>203996434Do Yanks say “finna” as well? I thought that was just a British thing
£5,000,000 pencilled to find and lock up antivaxers
Enjoying these posts but seriously what's been announced
>>203996434fr?
>fraud in our welfare systemthat's you lot
>covid corruption commissionerwho gives a fuck
>crackdown on bennie fraud/brit/ sweating bullets
>all members of the Reform Party to pay a 3% victim surcharge tax on their income to offset harm done by rioters and institutional racism
nicole healing they're coming for you
Oh yeah. Don't worry. They're smashing the gangs lads.For real this time I'm sure.
>>203996474nicola fucking sweating like saville in a hospital
>>203996434no cap?low key be thinking it do be used like that*smacks enormous nog lips*sheeeit
smash the neets
>>203996465It’s a black American thingIt’s “fixing to” in terms of desiring or planning to do something
russia just fined google 2.5 decilion dollars didn’t even know that was a real number. and i’m being unironic btw look it up
I'm just not going to workit's just a simple as that darling
>projects to target young people out of work to get them into employmentLMFAO they’re coming for all you lazy dossers hahaha
She's just announced 14bn fund for war on neets
>spamming tranny porn, gore, ewhores, and timmy "gimmick" during the budgetLegitimately neck yourself
Personal tax allowance has been removed to plug the economic blackhole
she mentioned immigration yet? literally the biggest problem this country has been facing for the last 25 years
*chimps out respectfully*
>>203996489But my hypermobility means I definitely can't get a WFH admin job
>>203996462im just glad i didnt wear my glasses
>>203996201I have the same phone case
>2% tax on shaggersLOL get fucked frogpostersIncelbros we stay winning!
>>203996462
Yeah so I’m not going to take it (the back to work help) haha
>>203996518racist bastard
>working peoplementioned
>>203996508no bennies for you!
>>203996518don't know how much control the chancellor has over immigration
And Reeves reads out the growth figures. They show a faster than expected rise this year and next year, but then weaker than forecast growth later in the forecast: GDP in 2024: +1.1%, up from 0.8% growth forecast at the March budget GDP in 2025: +2%, up from 1.9% growth forecast at the March budget GDP in 2026: +1.8%, down from 2.0% growth forecast at the March budget GDP in 2027: +1.5%, down from 1.8% growth forecast at the March budget GDP in 2028: +1.5% down from 1.7% growth forecast at the March budget GDP in 2029: +1.6%, a new forecast
Minimum wage up get in
uuuuuuuuurrrrrhhhhhh current event current event thing happening thing hapening politics politics politics *scratched arse and sniffs finger*
>national minimum wage for immigrants to rise to £40 per hour
>>projects to target young people out of work to get them into employmentHow? 1/4 of people under 30 have no jobsHow are they just going to suddenly create several million jobs in a few years
>border force budget cut to £12.50
>>203996509they always say that but then nothing happens
>raising minimum wage againMOVE THE FUCKING TAX BRACKETS THEN
Reeves announces the online gaming ban whereby if you do not work a full-time job your isp will cut off all internet access between 22:00-07:00
>>203996550considering every single immigrant comes here for financial reasons, i reckon quite a bit
MORE TAXMORE BENNIES
>>203996552does gdp growth forecast take the inflation forecast into account?
>>203996571Ubereats delivery jobs for all
might get the mrs to put on a limp in public so I can claim carer's
Reeves announces a £2,000,000 fund to provide better boats in Calais for the channel trip.
>bro earns minimum wage and is worried about the tax brackets :skull:
>>203996571there are jobsshe didn't say good jobs
>more carer bennies>lower debt repayment if you're on UCI thought they were going to crack down on frauds not better enable them
>>203996571millions of new migrant wanking jobs
>>203996529screaming
straight white males will be paying for all of this
Reeves reads a fenced off £20,000,000 fund to provide compensation for workers who experience sexual or racial harassment during their job.
Hello, guys. I'm new here, day one. Name's Diego.
>10% incel tax
done another bump of ket lads
mumbergs already on the pipscam for fibroso im going to become a full-time carer :-)
wish I received the fehpeh pension that I am owed
>>203996621>there are jobsThere aren'tThe government's own figures state there are 800k jobs
>more money from pensionersgreat. that's what this country really needed. more money to economically inactive millionaires.
>>203996648most productive brit poster
there's always more for pensioners
Mmmhhhhh yes tax me more mummy yes yessssssDo you want me to pay more national insurance mummy? Should I sell my house so you can take stamp duty off me mummy? I am a worm PLEASE take all my money off me mummy x
literally every tax so far is just hurting the poorest absolute state of them
New job announced, migrant ferry driver
>>203996571>1/4 of people under 30 have no jobsbollocks surelymany are students and stuff right?
Fuel duty frozen again
Jeremy Clarkson frothing at the gash
>>203996334Yes. To be clear I carry no guilt over it.
>>203996643fuck sakes, so I have to pay every time I cry about cartoon frogs on 4chan? feeling voter remorse now :/
PETRIL
omg she's so kind she isn't increasing taxeswhat a nice personlmaostate
lucky lucky cagies
how are they different from the tories again?
>>203996701>many are students and stuff right?that excludes students brudda
here wehere wehere we fucking go
capital gains here we go
employing people just became very difficult
holy shit they just killed small businesses in this countrywhat the fuck
>>203996663hang on rorke you've spent the last month accusing labour of freezing granny to death now suddenly she's an economically inactive millionaire
funnelling half of kids into uni is just a scheme for unis to spin money and to keep unemployment low thanks Blair!
>mfw living entirely off inheritancei'm getting fucked ain't i
>>203996761just labour things
THE STOCK MARKET IS CRASHING!!!!!SELL SELL SELL
my work's gonna push for salary sacrifice benefits so fucking hard nowI'm gonna be swimming in free Café Nero
>>203996771yes
>>203996762I'm a staunch "let the bastards freeze" believer me. Multi-millionaires who won't stop bleeting with their hands outstretched. Glorified bennie-dossers.
ITS OVERITS ALL CRASHING
>>203996762>accusing labour of freezing granny to deaththat was leftypolrorke wants granny to be in the workhouse if she cant pay for the gas, cunt can work for it
tarqs seething
>>203996761small businesses aren't bribing your politicianswhy would they get anything but total annihilation?
give me one thousand pounds
its easy to avoid inheritance tax. already got that sorted with me parents x
Be interesting to see the rate of redundancies after this
>>203996819based, let the povvo incels seethe
>>203996770it was actually due to pensions to keep boomers in work for 4 more years
>Tories wailing in pain because small businesses are taxed less while big businesses are taxed more
>>203996771the starmtroopers are coming for you
>>203996819put it in a trust lad?
and what of us lowly NHS employees? what gibs do we get?
i'm on ket so don't undrstand much
unemployed mfs watching the budget like they're gonna be affected by anything. Roaches always survive
>>20399685950% duty on ket pal
>>203996819Trying to get my parents to sign everything over to me and my sister before they get too old to do it, but Dadberg is fucking CONVINCED that I secretly have millions of debt hidden somewhere because he knew a guy who knew a guy who knew a guy who knew a guy who gave his son everything and lost it all because he had loads of debt.
NANNY NANNY NANNYGIVE US YOUR HOUSE
is your little tv show over yet lads im just here for the poo posts
>>203996881NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO
>>203996749facking hell
no pay rise for me then
>>203996896wahey
>>203996908what would his budget look like?
get grandad to employ you as a gardener before popping his clogs
>>203996889...bro you must be such a wastrel if your dad is doing thisu have your whole life to show him you're not a runt and he still thinks you are one
Might give up smoking
>10% more tax on rolling baccy
retard here. is the capital gains tax rise not as much as expected?
She's not supporting the Coca-Cola Company
>soft drinks industry levyTHE FUCKERS ARE PRICING ME OUT OF MY DAILY MONSTER
Smoke more to save our country!
>>203996916fuck up
>>203996944nearly doubled at the lower rate mate
lol sunak rinsed
Private jet users on suicide watch
Ciggies and a can of coke now costs £45.It’s over.
>She adds that the government will publish a “Get Britain Working” white paperWhat will be included?
smoke to save RNHS
>mfw brought back 10 50g packs of amber leaf from turkey in augustseethe on
>>203996963dont get it
It's over for Tarqs
this is so boring
i do find the convention of addressing "The Speaker" constantly to be gay and cringe
>>203996933Easiest way is to replace it with something elseLike eating candy every time you feel like smoking
so you're just gonna do your taxes huhis that what's hotis that what's going on the streets
>>203996967it's called a white paper because only white people will be made to work
>>203996971gets stale
>>203996977he is a silicon valley gremlin on the side
look at him pretending to be busy chatting lmao
>>203996928I don't know why he thinks this. I went to Uni, did great in school, I have a job at Deutsche Bank, I'm on £30k a year, and I don't gamble or drink heavily. No clue why he thinks this, he's just very paranoid.
kek a direct tax on Rishi Sunak
>>203996928Run along little child
bruh what was that on business rates you just said we will lower it but make the most expensive properties pay morewutttttwhere's the details
Don't think I'll ever get an experience like playing gun game on legoland in CSS again, lads
PENNY OFF THE PINT
A PENNY ON THE PINT
>>203996998fucking hell I earn more than that, I thought banks were big ££££
>>203996998you probably just give off pathetic gimp vibes so he rightly doesn't trust you
SHE MADE THE PINTS CHEAPER LETSFUCKING GOOOOOOOOO
PINTS ARE BACK
PENNY OFF A PINT
CHEAPER PINTSBIGGEST CHEER OF THE DAY
>>203996991No it's called a white paper because there will be nothing written on it
GET THE PINTS IN
>on £27k and work 60 hour weeks>£9.38 an hour>minimum wage now £12might just go work at maccies
Draught beer is cheaperThat's nice
>I have a job at Deutsche Bank, I'm on £30k a yearholy fuckin Owari Da
Getting drunk off aldi wine, lads
TAX ON RISHI SUNAK'S PLANETAX ON RISHI SUNAK'S WIFE
GREAT BRITAIN'S PINTS ARE SAVED
>>203997003?>>203996998meh
Still in the night i should be knightedYou pay the members fee but you’re still uninvited
NON DOMS ON THE ROPES
>>203997051why are you working 60 hours
>>203997030I only joined in September 2023, once I get my post-grad qualifications it should go up to about £50-60k
YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES YES
>>203997051what the fuck are you doing, man
>>203997051How long have you been doing that to yourself for and why?
>Chancellor Rachel Reeves has announced a “flat rate duty” on vaping liquid from October 2026 MN fucked over Next it'll be a duty on Pot Noodles, Red Bull and YouTube videos
she’s being a real fucking bitch lads like absolutely horrible while I’m just trying to be civil reckon it’s because she realises she’s made a monumental error and cant stand being around me because of that the reality of her situation will hit her like a ton of fucking bricks when all her friends are busy, going out drinking every night loses its fun and she’s sat alone in her grim little flat by herself and she remembers what she had won’t me my problem then. I wont reciprocate
>Vape Duty of £2.20 per 10ml of liquid.WTFFFFFF what will I suck now
not nearly enough
>>203997096mousenonce bros...
Going to have a few days off wanking
big wank brewingyou know when you're walking down the street and suddenly think "cor could go for a wank later"that was me 6 hours ago
>>203997051teacher?
>>203997030Not him but there’s a lot of different roles at a bank. He’s probably in back office work that’s where they stash the freaks and they don’t make much
has booze tax been lowered?
>>203997108Can suck on an exhaust for free
>propping up oil and gas cosnot very greta thunberg of you Labour ???
>>203997125taxed up in supermarkets, 1p off in pubs
>>203997095>>203997080>>203997088for about 2 years now and I do it because I'm expected to - this isn't a conscious choice I'm making. my manager HATES me and I have no clue why, so she's itching for any reason to get me sacked and I'm refusing to give her that chance. So I work like hell.
howling they really are going to do the vat on private schoolsutter mongoloids
>>203997104can't believe rachel reeves does all that
So when is whisky being loweredthe tax is ridiculous and harms the scottish distiling industry
VAT on private schools will make fuck all difference to the povvos at state comps, it will only make it so many more kids have to go to shit schools because their parents can no longer afford it, pure crabs in bucket policy decision
>>203997142get your head checked
>>203997104what happened la?
>>203997108suck some willylabour will never tax that
>>203997108wtf I get those £1 ones from poundland
Getting to work at 7 today to drive the lorry and make local deliveries
fuck's sake
Getting up to date on news about the hawk tuah girl
>>203997151putting fiscal barriers to entry to getting a good education is vital for a healthy, prospering society.
>>203997108suck a fart from my arse
>>203997139attacks on the friendless once again
>>203997151what do you expect from labour, who hated grammar schools
>>203997155my first and only ever gf (and best and only friend) of 4 and a half years left me lad
>>203997151100% and putting more pressure on the state sectorpure populist low iq shit
What did I miss?
>2028ill be dead by then
>>203997142has it not occurred to you to just get another job that isn't so shit?
>Tax on tobacco to increase by 2% above inflation, and 10% above inflation for hand-rolling tobaccoleave fags alone
>>203997187not a ton, tbqh
>>203997170Sounds comfyI often daydream of a job on the roads rather than being a desk jockey
>2028/2029so not in this government thenfarce
>>203997174this would make sense if ordinary schools were actually good and not hellscapes
how about saving money by reducing the bennies given to illegal immigrants and not paying ridiculous sums for them to stay in hotels?
>>203997197On a 3 year contract :/ - and it's decent experience that will look good on a CV
>>203997181this the one who just got a job while you don’t have one?
>>203997198Just get em from abroad meBring a big brick home from holidays and work trips, usually lasts me few a couple of months and then by that time usually got something booked abroad again
brainlets are really like>hurr durr if you force every kid in state schools then it will be a level playing fieldbrb rich people>hire tutors>buy houses in the areas with the best state schools
>>203997221sounds like common sense mate. can't be having that
AI doctors let’s fucking go lads
nth for the baddiedem
bet she took a quarter of a xanny before this
The Scotch have to import their own Scotch from England to save money. This actually is true.
>>203997226no
not watching the budget will just watch the damo video later
where is the onlyfans levy?
>>203997234never been abroad, got no mates to go with
tax rise on GAMERS!?
a single pence off pints.whats the point?
>>203997181>only friendwe can telll
>>203997255anyone notice the boobs?
>>203997271what happened then?was some other poster talking about that scenario last week
>>203997198Ah yes increase the healthier option even more than the usual stuff. Brilliant.
£1bn for downies
>>203997284alri small pintsmansome of us pintslads can put away 50 a week, that means every 15 weeks we get a free pintGET INNNN
>>203997286now that you mention it ..........
>>203997255get inwoke up to noe and em streaming this morning
>>203997291/brit/ is rich!
£3 TRILLION to Israel
This meeting costs around £10,000 per hour and most people are sat there not doing anything.
>>203997255the last person you would expect to own a crt and pvm
>ukraine ukraine ukraine ukraineoh my fucking god
300BN TO UKRAINE
>>203997284to GET THE FUCKING PUBS OPEN
it should be £1 off pints quite frankly. thats the only way to tempt people back into pubs
>>203997310link omg what a tum
>2billion increase in annual national defence>all of it will go to pookraine and pissrael
>Vee-Jay day
>muh nazis
>>203997274Ah that's a shame
>holocaust education being mentioned in the budget.... what
Don’t really like politicians.Bunch of cunts.
40BN TO HOLOCAUST VICTIMS
>£2m for holocaust educationbizarre
>£2bn to Holocaust educationumm.... why...? we didn't even do it... it didn't happen in our country...
>>203997067Ah yes, the little child is Diego. For the love of God man, have sex!
SMASH THE BUSY FINGERED
>noting about immigration
>>203997201It is comfy, i like making deliveries and getting to see the local places i never would have otherwise. Hotels, resorts, hospitals, etc. Lots of nice ladies at the front desks that must give me their signature
>>203997353>>203997370>>203997371israeli propaganda coz people are waking up to the gaza genocide
>>203997371>>203997382starmer getting a favour called in for his mates at the 'gogue
>shtop sthoplifting lmaooo
>holocaust educationSo they support killing all the Palestinians
Bad news for shoplifters
>>203997284In isolation this looks minuscule but think about it in real terms - the price of beer is going DOWN while inflation stands at 2.6%. Overall it represents about 2p off a pint. That's TWICE as much!
>>203997383?
>holocaust educationas if anyone needed any more proof about who runs the show
>>203997353>>203997371>>203997382looks like you forgot that every minister is either a jew or married to one
toby on the ropes
>>203997409>>203997409>>203997409
>>203997333Imagine if they just span round and said no VAT on draught beer in pubs
>>203997405its over for the mousey guy
£1 for every jew who died in the holocaust...
>>203997310corrrrrrrrr happy days my lad x
>>203997337https://www.twitch.tv/cinnanoe
