Growing up, did you ever think you would end up as a kkhv incel?Shit I didnt even know what an 'incel' is or if that kind of people existed in my country.
>>205834379I always had the feeling even like at 6yo that i would never have a gf
When I was 13 I told my mum that she should never expected grandchildren from me
>>205834379fucking street shittergo drink some cow piss
>>205834434>>205834434
>>205834434Why the hate brother, we're all in the same boat here
>>205834379I knew from the start yeah. Never liked people or being touched.
>>205834379I became very asocial and depressed at the start of puberty plus the supercharge from mild autism and at that point it was already obvious in my head that I'll never feel the romantic or sexual intimacy of a woman, basically ruined my entire life and the feeling of loneliness keeps getting worse now in my mid 20s
>>205834379no
>>205834379Yeah, I had a precognition. When I was a child I read a comic that it's nit supposed to be for kids (Dylan Dog series). In this short story one man and a woman grow up alone, they are made for each other, but they can never find love. A ghost tries to hel them meet each other but he fails because they are too stubborn to give each other a chance because they want better. They end up kill themselves.Now, I wouldnt kill myself for a foid but that story remains stuck in my psyche.
>>205834379No, but I wouldn't say that I'm an incel as it's not involuntarily. Growing up I knew I that I was kind of handsome, not saying that I'm a Brad Pitt, but I know that I'm not ugly seeing as I've been cold approached by women before. But unfortunate events have made it difficult for me to have a normal relationship which is why I'm here.
No, even as a kid I was friendless and not really cool. So looking back it's not a surprise I would end up as an old bachelor. Luckily for me I was a rather good looking guy in my early 20s (in a boyish way) so I managed to somehow get 2 girlfriends, so at least I wouldn't be wondering what's sex like and so on. Being a middle-aged virgin would be pretty bad.
I knew ever it since I had my dream from my past life, I coped and knew it was my fate.My life is painfulhttps://m.youtube.com/watch?v=nCKMjBmlxg4&pp
>>205836822same, im 29on the outside i come off as normal. i have an office job, apartment, car etc. and people at work often ask me if im married or have kids.outside of my job i no social life. i only leave my apartment to buy food.
I realized it when I read encyclopedia dramatica.
>>205834379Why be an incel? Just get arrange marriaged or get an escort or prostitute.
I started browsing 4chan around 13 and started browsing /r9k/ at around 15, all the warnings were there and I still just let it happen, it just kind of happened in slow motion and before you know it you're a 27yo NEET virgin.
>>205838089>Im still a young man with no mental retardation>it's literally over
>>205834379I think if you told me i wouldn't have been really surprised
>>205834379I didn't think about foids at all until I became like 16 I still barely think about them unless I want to masturbate or to whine. I wanted to be sort of a nobleman with a military or civil imperium in my childhood and now (at 19) I'm very disappointed.
>>205834379during high school it became pretty clear, i just went straight home everyday and played maplestory, never did anything with friends even. 30yo now and i become more and more lonely and schizo every year
>>205834379Kind of. As a toddler I never liked being touched or being naked, and my parents used to make fun of me, telling me I'd never have sex. I remember being around 9 or so, and being certain that I'd not get a gf during school, but I thought that I'd get one at Uni, and eventually get married. But I believed that there were autists like me out there. When I realised people suck and fuck as early as they can, and I was so far behind already, I became more and more insecure, until I gradually gave up completely. Honestly, I am not good with intimacy. I both need it, and hate it. I am not interested in a relationship without intimacy, but at the same time I cannot get past the current day where everyone's had practise relationships and sucked and fucked tens of people. At the same time I really do not like the idea of being dependent on and open to another person, which itself makes me react with aversion. Honestly, trying to put myself in a mental image where I'm naked and having sex makes me feel both angry and afraid. I don't think I'll ever get past all these hangups, considering I'm nearly 30 already.The weirdest part of it all is that a part of me is a masochist, so I used to daydream about dying alone, poor and a virgin, and somehow it'd make me feel kind of good. I'd make up these stories about how I'd fail at uni and end up becoming a janitor at a lab, and there'd be this woman working there that I'd stare at from afar, but she'd be getting railed by some chad thundercock, so I'd just sit in my closet and inspect my mops while she'd get fucked in the bathroom. I had these thoughts since I was a teenager. I didn't want to get cucked, it wasn't sexual, I had others where I died from cancer, or became homeless or whatever else. They used to bring me comfort. Was it masochism? A defence mechanism where I dream of worst case scenarios to protect myself from the future? I don't know. But I think I'm heading down the path of self-destruction in any case....
>>205838903>The weirdest part of it all is that a part of me is a masochist, so I used to daydream about dying alone, poor and a virgin, and somehow it'd make me feel kind of good. I'd make up these stories about how I'd fail at uni and end up becoming a janitor at a lab, and there'd be this woman working there that I'd stare at from afar, but she'd be getting railed by some chad thundercock, so I'd just sit in my closet and inspect my mops while she'd get fucked in the bathroom. I had these thoughts since I was a teenager. I didn't want to get cucked, it wasn't sexual, I had others where I died from cancer, or became homeless or whatever else. They used to bring me comfort. Was it masochism? A defence mechanism where I dream of worst case scenarios to protect myself from the future? I don't know. But I think I'm heading down the path of self-destruction in any case....literally me(except the cucking). Why do we think like this tho?
>>205839151My bet is that both of you are brown.
>>205834379I'm not incel but every time I was with a woman I felt raped and wanted to puke
>>205838693>maplestoryAre you gay or what?
>>205838144>Im still a young man with no mental retardationThe brain stops developing at 25, you don't reach full maturity having gone through life reaching absolutely no milestones that a normal person would and not end up completely fucked. If you make it to 21 without putting your penis in a vagina, getting a job, and driving a car it's over.Also I have low-IQ and probably have autism anyway.
>>205834379i'm pretty old so i had a few gf's before social media and dating apps were a thing, but i've never been able to make it last as i always lose interest eventually. figured it's not something that i was meant to do.
I self sabotaged all my relationships because i always felt they would betrayed me or use me. Now i am alone and diagnosed with schizophrenia.
>>205839641You waste your life the very second you realize nothing matters. It may be at 70, at 27, at 22, at 16, at 5. When you know there's no gods or fate or whatever and all social things are spooks and not even you genes are any relevant, it's actually already over.
>>205839151Like I said, I think it's a defence mechanism. We fantasise about the worst possible endings, so that when they come true, or at least something similar, we've already processed the situation in our heads and imagine that it won't sting as bad. It's the only logical hypothesis I can make. It's born out of a defeatist attitude and insecurity. Also dunno, in my case I made up whole poetic stories, so a part of it also comes down to aesthetical preferences for a tragic ending to make a meaningless life find some purpose in the suffering. >>205839194Nobody asked vodkanigger.
>>205839886You won't ever become whiter. I'm sorry.
One part of me knew it would happen. I was never really interested in dating, so I never did it. Nothing has changed to this day about it.
my dear incel brothers, i was cold apporoched by a anime girl. this is my first time. should i have a shot or not? i'm confused.
>>205840187You should start pooping in a loo first.
>>205839738>self sabotaged all my relationships because i always felt they would betrayed meSame, but it's more the intense fear of them leaving me that gets me and the more I care about them the more intense the feeling gets which is where the self sabotaging begins. Betrayal is up there too. It's odd that despite being aware of this and understanding how idiotic and irrational it is it's a hard feeling to shake off.
>>205834379yes, even when I was 5 I couldn't get along with other children, I knew it's over for me
>>205838693this since primary school.
>>205840373no one is a asking a vodka nigger.
>>205839641Those are just excuses because you are lazy and you are content with being a NEET, stop complaining about thinga you dont want anyway.
>>205839753This. Might as well enjoy the ride. Everything will end anyway be it tomorrow or millions of years into the future.
>>205838089Brutal
>>205834379>when asked about dating when a kid my response amounted to "I'd only do it if paid to">ignored the girls that had interest in me in highschool>never felt this so called "romantic love" everyone always gushes aboutI didn't think it but if described to the old me I'd probably have said "yep, sounds like me"
>>205840408true, eventually i just devolve into a world of self-torture, wondering if they actually care about me or not. Funny how it works, my defense mechanism only trapped me in a lonely limbo with no light of escape.
As a fellow KHHV the important thing to remember that no being desired by women isn't a moral failing. Women are depraved, stupid and their desires are often grotesque, not being desired them doesn't mean you as a person are bad or even necessarily inadequate.
>>205834407Same here. Sometimes something inside you already tells you the truth
Just rape
>>205834379From a very young age, I had an extremely depressive mentality. I spent most of my early years drawing corpses and cadavers as my brother liked to watch the medical surgery channel and autopsy shows. This was around age 5 or 6.While my dad was a religious man, I took every lesson he taught me to the worst possible conclusion—the only conclusion a 6-year-old could make when things were explained so terribly. He said I deserved to go to hell because no one deserved anything, and I accepted that idea. I feared him and feared God, but not in a reverent sense. The obedience instilled in me was the seething, Luciferian kind—not the loyalty of a dog.I always imagined him getting hurt or maimed to pay for his beatings, but watching him grow weak and shrivel over time felt odd and anticlimactic. As I grew older and understood more about power, it became clear that my mother was more evil than he was. While she didn’t whip or punch us, she would swear at us and slap our faces in private—not as punishment like my father but to vent her frustrations about her own life.Her emotions swung whichever way suited her, manipulating us with a false facade to get what she wanted. Worst of all, she was the one I learned from because I trusted her as a toddler. Now she’s practically a vegetable—or a chameleon—changing to match whatever person or situation she’s closest to.Both of them represent two fates before death: one who exhausted brute power into a shattered corpse that needs oxygen to breathe, and the other who lost their essence long ago, becoming more like a ventriloquist's doll or taxidermy puppet manipulated by my relatives to impose their will on me.As result I never desired to be around another person and i only felt satisfaction in inflicting pain in others, but i learned to that no matter how much power i commanded or tears i induced in my fellow man there was no fulfillment or reward in any of it, it felt hollow so i receded from all social interaction
>>205841515you should write an autobiography
>>205839738Pretty much but I’m not schizophrenic, just extremely neurotic
>>205834379Im not one though, I lost my virginity at 14, last time I had sex was 2018im 31
>>205841937It is not crazy eitherMany people do just use you and don’t care about youIt’s doubtful even a single human even genuinely cares so it’s better to be alone
Why is it so difficult for you guys to speak with girls and go on a date?
>>205834379I have known since I was around 11 and got diagnosed that I would spend my life in solitude yep.
>>205842487For me it's a physical impossibility so at least I have an excuse.
>>205842487I'm just too awkward and strange around women and spending time around them doesn't fix it. It is what it is.
>>205834379The first time I was told what sex was I was like 5, and my - literally - immediate first response was fear of being able to perform. It was a long road, but very clearly a straight one.
>>205838903>I'd just sit in my closet and inspect my mops while she'd get f-ed in the bathroomlol
Just fucking get arrange married bruh. Thats the only good thing of being a browncel. You get to fuck a used up whore atleast in your 30s
when i was in middle school they had us write an essay about how we imagined our futures, i wrote about being a friendless hopeless wagie doing bitch work and they sent me to the guidance counselor. from a young age i knew this life would be a wash
>>205842487I have no friends or anything.
>>205841515That was a pretty interesting story, you should write a novel if its fake or autobigraphy if real.
>>205834379Yeah, I did think that way. I’m not an ugly person and have had female attention but I was ugly and had speech problems growing up which sort of fucked up my socialisation. I had one gf but we broke up a while back. She made the first move though.>>205842916Id rather kms than get an arranged marriage, you’re chained to a stranger you know nothing about for the rest of either her or your life’s. Also, there’s a good chance you aren’t going to have sex often because neither of you would be attracted to the other.
>>205834379No, and it fucking sucks. I blame my delayed puberty which only began when I was 16, so I basically lost the "practice years" and have been trying to catch up since. Just got back from a BBQ where all my friends were talking about fucking women and all the fun stories that they have accumulated over years of doing it and I'm here with NOTHING FUCK
>>205842741Just think of them as guys, BUT don’t make sexual jokes unless you’re reciprocating. You’ll them become friends with them and hopefully one of them will ask you out. Atleast that’s what happened with me.
>>205834379No. Getting a girl to love me was my biggest dream since I was 11-12 years old since I had extreme mommy issues. I tried everything to get a girlfriend but it never worked out.
>>205842682How so?
>>205842741I've noticed people who struggle speaking with women usually struggle with speaking in general. Perhaps try speaking with random guys first, and once that becomes easier, then speaking with women wouldn't be a problem anymore.
>>205843818I have no immune system. https://primaryimmune.org/understanding-primary-immunodeficiency/types-of-pi/common-variable-immune-deficiency-cvid
>>205842487Brazilian girls are needy and judgmental and experienced by the time you're 18+. I didn't learn the ropes when I was 13-15 and now I'm basically a dumbass with no experience who is supposed to charm these chicks and worse, perform well in bed after
>>205843903Do you just stay inside the house? Are you a NEET? Have you tried interacting with other people who have it over the internet? I have no idea, sorry if these questions are retarded.
>>205834379I thought of it as a possebility when a bully told me id never have sex when I was 12but then i got lucky and grew to 190cm and got laid if I hadnt got lucky and grown to above average height hed probably wouldve been correct
>>205834379Yes, I have always recognized that normalfags don’t like my autism, girls included.
>>205843719I lost my "practice years" aswellI only lost my virginity at 19 with a 16 year old classmate because I repeated 2 grades
>>205843802What did you try?
>>205837729How do you escortmaxx in lundia?
>>205844052No worries, I never leave my home unless it's for emergency medical visits or surgery. I do not have a job, I have what is essentially early retirement due to my health (I get around $1700/month in permabux) plus a ton of aid when it comes to medicine and equipment. I do have a lot of friends online, my PC is my life.
I could've had a girlfriend and sex but I was such a chad that I dumped her a day after I asked her out (didn't even get a kiss)
genuinely do not want one. i idealise people when i'm alone but when i give it a single attempt i'm just exhausted and want everyone to fuck off.
>>205844442You lucked out being born in Sweden lol. There are probably women with the same condition you have, perhaps you could try to contact them over the internet?
>>205844442How did you get your education?
>>205844674Thing is, how would we meet? I cannot travel, neither can they. I have several women in the friend group already, even some I would dare say I am slightly in love with but I know shit is never going to work for me or them. But like you said, I am lucky to have been born here and not somewhere else. >>205844730From age 8-14 I didn't. I was in the hospital almost all the time. After that I am one of few who got home schooled. It's not legal in Sweden except for in special circumstances and I qualified. So I had two private teachers who helped me four times per week over the phone and later via video calls online. And my parents did their part.
>>205844202Better than me, I lost mine at 21 albeit with a girl my age.
>>205844839There’s a lot more to a relationship than physical touch and sex. I’m sure that a woman who had the same condition would be willing to have an online relationship with you.
>>205834379No. But Im not so it's okay.
>>205843903Holy shit I've only seen this in exam questions
>>205834379Yeah I had a fear of that, even in my kid days when I was liked by girls
>>205842487I can speak with girls (and anyone) about things that are absolutely necessary but how would that help me going on a date? Do you want me to make a fool of myself?
>>205845204How rare is the extreme version of it? The link says 1 in 25k but I think that includes the milder cases.
>>205834379When I heard of the blackpill everything about this world clicked for me.Like a troon hearing about HRT.
>>205842487bait but I'll do a blog>shy and depressed kid who wouldn't casually talk to girls until 23 yo>fall in love with one girl from uni a few months after meeting her for the first time>she was the one showing signs of attraction first by being touchy but I like her for her intelligence, politeness and some other non-physical reasons>get out of my comfort zone and text her >ask her out for a coffee again? busy>have some chats during later months but eventually she stops replying >I was awkward and fumbling left and right in my later texts>leave her alone because she probably doesn't want to talk to me but for months every day I keep thinking about herI also asked out on a movie a weeb female friend I recently made who I originally met back in hs who's not particularly attractive and who also does the same things with her friends but she said she wasn't interested in the movie or something Fucking bizarre how I have so many male friends who ask me to hang out but unlike them 0 females would hang around with me even as a friend. No interactions with girls during puberty has left a permanent mark.
>>205845204>>205845383According to my doctor I am one of 231 in Sweden having the severe version and 1 in 780 in the Nordics that she knew about. The support group I am in has 400 or so members and from all over Europe.
>>205845878How many of them are female? Is it sex-linked like colourblindness?
>>205845878Are you in like a safe room or something like that ? Would you risk your health/life to fuck a woman ?
>>205845709>have some chats during later months but eventually she stops replyingHave you tried asking her out explicitly? Young college women won't stay free for long
>>205842487Theyre spergs. Basically.
>>205846045If I was him I’d try to fuck a prostitute with a strap-on while wearing a hazmat suit.
>>205845952It seems to be very 50/50. The group is almost perfectly mixed. >>205846045No I am just in a normal room with a good air purifier. My parents are ironically the biggest risk in my life, they live downstairs and get me all my food, drink and medical supplies. When they are sick, I am on my own. But I still get sick all the time. >Would you risk your health/life to fuck a woman ?No. I can't even hug my parents without catching a cold or something. People always carry infections even when they aren't sick. And a cold to me usually means high fever, deep cough and often pneumonia. I can only imagine what would happen if I went out and fucked some random woman.
>>205846275Are any of them in relationships? You mentioned relying on your parents, sorry if I am putting it too bluntly but how do the people with the condition who don’t have parents anymore handle it?
>>205834379when I was a child I unironically thought there were only differences in what age someone would start dating, but by HS or at most 18 almost everyone would have a gf.
>>205846088We once had coffee alone (unplanned, there were supposed to be more people) and I had asked her out for another coffee. I wanted to get to know her better first.Later when we messaged again we were talking about something and she said (jokingly or not?) about how she would tell me about it over coffee and once when I accidentally saw her irl she said she owes me a coffee.I think with doing this she had literally EDGED me mentality and it's probably one of the reasons I can't stop thinking about her, also the fact that I didn't have such strong feeling towards her during the first few months after we met, when she was the one asking me for help about uni stuff and so on.
>>205845709>but I like her for her intelligence, politeness and some other non-physical reasonscringe that you feel like you have to explain that. For a variety of reasons you want to breed her. You want to PLAP PLAP PLAP her. You want to cum inside and fertilize her eggs to generate descendants (subconsciously). Something in her personality probably resonates with your own self-image.
>>205846397>Are any of them in relationships?I have no idea to be honest. > how do the people with the condition who don’t have parents anymore handle it?Since I am Europe based it's usually state help. Bux, paid healthcare aid and so on. But I have chatted with some folks in Asia and the USA and they say you either have family or friends who help you or nothing at all. And with nothing I mean they try live normally but keep getting sick until they reach the end.
I'm "handsome" but I have an inexplicably uncanny gay alien face
>>205846402my friends and most of my class were GFless nerd freaks. It's over, I couldn't even learn from my environment
>>205834379I never expected much tb hI knew from a young age I was a lazy
>>205846577* personality and her physical appearance too, most likely but not necessarily
>>205846597Why don’t you ask lol? Also, have you heard about the Gateway Tapes and astral projection? I feel you should look into it. It’s 100% real, from personal experience.
>>205834379I assumed it would happen one day until around my early 20s then I accepted it was not in the cards for me. It's never too late though I did end up with a gf in my 30s.
2023 will be our yearWAGMI
>>205846897
>>205834379Not really. I was very naive growing up and didn't realize it had in fact been over before it even began until I was in my mid-20's.
>>205846823that's literally me but my gf can't get wet when we have sex, what does this mean? this thing is killing my self-esteem
>>205845709Take this advice from me. Be direct with girls. Don't beat around the bush, and then spend 1 year fantasizing about her. Don't try to be a gentleman. Ask her directly to go out with you. If she says no, but leaves the door open for you, ask again after a week or two, if she says no again, delete her and move on. Don't bother anymore. Also, if you talk with a new girl every day, you'll have a girlfriend by the end of the month. Don't glue yourself to one girl. If she's into you, she'll make it known. Girls don't play long games. You either strike in, or you strike out and move on. Do not waste your time after a rejection.
>>205844029>I didn't learn the ropes when I was 13-15the second best time is today
yeah since i was in kindergarten
>>205847280She's dehydrated, literally.
>>205834379I've had sex (with escorts) but i was never interested in a relationships. I would live somewhere quiet without any people if i could to be honest.
>>205834379>>205834407>>205834421>>205835329>>205836570>>205838089>>205843802>>205844154>>205845709>>205846823
>>205834379I actually got hit on by girls and asked out a few times (yes them asking me) so I thought at some point I’d stop being such an insecure autist and accept or things would just happen, never happened still insecure about everything, just can’t bring myself to open up
>>205848123I look like this and say such things, now here’s my life story:
>>205846442>the first few monthsNigga you should explicitly ask a woman out before a few months went past
>>205848123kek
>>205847629I'll try, I'm going travelling soon and will be in hostels so I'll see if I can plapplap some chicks I meet in them. I had sex once before so at least I won't be a full turbo-virgin, albeit that was 3 years ago and nowhere near enough experience to be good at it
Why is it that you incel freaks keep bitching and crying and moanin' and shittin' your pants about your KHHV status when you live in the age of information aka the time period where the availablity of both dates & casual sex is at an all-time high?I had 4 hook ups on Grindr this (slow) month alone and I'm planning to have twice the number next month, with no plans to stop.
>>205848684not everyone here is looking for dating men
>>205848684>the time period where the availablity of both dates & casual sex is at an all-time high1% only
>>205848684>GrindrIf you've never put your benis in bagina you're still an incel
>>205848684>GrindrGays have no idea how different it is with women. You are men looking for other horny men, we have to court the opposite sex and deal with their different libido.
>>205848967They have similar libido but they are selective cunts running on a different system because of evolution, pregnancy etc etc whatever
Daily incel r9k self-pity thread
>>205842487I have nothing in common with women my ageI have nothing in common with most men either but men tend to be more responsive to me speaking about random bullshitI get along with with older people, not the people my age I don't understand them at all There are a few women I get along with but they aren't single nor am I good at flirting anyway
>>205835329darkmega?
>>205834379NopeI remember being 14 wanking all day long and I couldn't wait to be an adult, go to clubs, pick up girls and fuck themNever did until I was 24 and realized I had ED from too much porn, stopped doing that and realized i'll always get 4/10 girls since i'm a 6/10.Still coping with it, I have some good days and bad days we'll see, but I feel i've missed a lot already
I think something unironically happened to me when i was around 13, I basically have very few memories of that time period, and I remember before that I was a sociable child who could make friends and even talked to girls. After that memory time skip, I became a shut in recluse that doesnt know how to make friends anymore and am terrified of talking to strangers.So no my life seemed good until i hit puberty and went to high school i thinkA girl at work had a crush on me but I was too autistic to realise it until after she quit and started dating another guyIm capable of talking to women now but I pretend they're guys in my head to bypass my fear, so Im not really able to flirt or express any desire for them
>>205848123sad lonely faggot website
>>205834379Probably when nobody want to be my partner for the egg project, when i was always the last one to get a couple for the dance stuff
>>205848684gay peepo be like "how we be gettin aids n sheeit"
>>205848486I want to know the other person more before a potential relationship
>>205834379Honestly I thought I would be dead, in prison or homeless by my current age (30), not living with my loving gf and both working jobs we enjoy. If you're some depressed ass 16-20 year old dude reading this, remember there's still hope, focus on being the best you can be instead of the things you don't have in life and you can make it.
>>205834379at 16 i thought id be married by 25t. 31yo khv
>>205852795our mistake is assuming that things just happen
>>205853595they do just happen for most people
>>205853649that underestimates their risk taking, their hard decisions and their bravery
>>205842487I must have dated at least 50+ girls, texted in the hundreds. Had sex, rejection also a lot.Best I could do in 28 years was a relationship on 10 months during which she broke up. Unlike you guys, I am not a retaded NEET virgin loser with no social skills. Just flat-out undesirable.
>>205842487I can talk with girls like anyone else. I just don't know how to escalate it to flirting.
>>205848684>tf>GrindrYou're possesed by parasites, you demon faggot greek dog
>>205834379Yeah it was pretty obvious early on I had something wrong with me
>>205847537Awful advice. I know a guy that took this same advice to heart and he got beaten to a curb and reported to the police several times before he ended up in court and had to pay fines out of his ass. Completely ruined him mentally and now he just stays at home living off his parents.
>>205856589This advice is for incels who are still a little bit in touch with reality and not completly far gone autists
>>205856755Yeah no, a guy who had a friend group and basically did everything right wasn't even ugly just an average dude, average height and he still got ruined. That's the reality here, you live in fucking Brazil what do you know about reality in sh*trope.
>>205855715>flat-out undesirablethat sounds worse
>>205848123literally me.
