the thread

this is the one

>>217723379
>>217723396
It will be soon, lads

>>217724950
Pretty difficult to improve working conditions of a fucking prison isn't it

>>217724983
step 1: stop employing retarded africans.
that will improve things quite a bit by the sounds of it

>>217725010
That's how it was until about 2 years ago and people were still working

thinking about lembit opik, the politician who went out with one of the cheeky girls

>>217725010
you're not even wrong, the whole scheme is backfiring dramatically because competent staff are thinking fuck dealing with this mongs I'm leaving

Esoteric Starmerism

>>217725030
Why?

>>217725030
He's a Reformchad now

>Grabbing a quick meal at a casual place

>Guy sits next to me and starts watching music videos on his tablet with full volume
>“Excuse me, could you please turn that off?”

>“Is you the owner? Why you talking to me when you don't even know me? Stop bothering me”

i think the companies that manufacture and distribute gift wrapping and sello tape deliberately made them as infuriating and unwieldy to use as possible so that you'd make more mistakes and have to buy more sooner. there's simply no other explanation for this level of insidiousness

>>217725031
i wouldnt work in any environment, let alone a potentially dangerous one like a prison, if i couldnt trust my colleagues.

>>217725062
And his ethnicity?

>>217725062
this didn't happen to you but they they are like this

>>217725080
the poor grasp of english and the dog shit attitude tells you all you need to know

>>217725043
it was a big deal at the time because he's not exactly a looker

why are indians the poorest people in the world but also one of the most obsessed demographics with gambling? they earn like 20 quid a month whats the point in gambling it

>>217725084
Can you spot the error in your post? Besides being racist when you can't even use your own language correctly

>>217725094
working class brit then

>>217725074
oh yeah another thing is they do nothing when other staff are in trouble. A lass was getting shoved the other week and the spastic wog just watched it happen

>>217723369
mental how this is considered an ancient meme

>>217725080
His ancestors were monarchs and so on

>>217725102
gambling is closely linked to IQ

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>Can you spot the error in your post?

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I don't need to tell you which one was jumping the queue. You already know.

>>217725112
yeh one of those new 'brits' (who probably doesnt work)

not seen a hatpost on /brit/ for years, tis a shame how far the intellect of this general has fallen...

what the fuck, i just got locked out of my tinder.

>>217725158
Play stupid games, win stupid prizes, should have respected the queue

>>217725102
if anything gambling actually makes more sense the poorer your life is, you've already accustomed yourself to living in poverty so losing is minimal risk and the up side of winning in that situation is far more worth than being a middle class wagie slowly bleeding your kids savings away

>>217725164
were you being misogynistic?

>>217725062
he was a black fella i take it?

>gambling is good if you're poor
mousenonce take

>>217725062
take your phone out and do the same

oooooh, i wont let you goooo

imagine getting called a bhechod by some pajeet
ha, fucking wISH mate, have you SEEN my sister? she soooo fucking fit. she looks like velma from scooby doo (the fit one from the 2002 film, not the ugly dyke one or the paki one)

>living in london

there's your problem

someone searched on the youtube app on the tv 'porno film'

glod

>>217725216
When he refused, that is what I threatened to do. He kept repeating the same nonsense and dared me to come toward him, which I laughed off.

He was waiting on a takeaway order, so he ultimately left, but not before telling me that I should feel lucky that he didn't give me the beating I deserved.

just about OD'd on opioids just now i think i'll give tomorrow a miss (assuming i don't die in my slee)
maybe just a little bit to wind down in the evening but that's all

>>217725212
more if you're living in a country that has little to no upward social mobility

anyone remember the cuckio meme

>>217725258
good lad it stops tonight

>>217725258
inconceivably grim. sort your fucking life out

>>217725158
>Five years
Meanwhile the guy who ran into the Scouser parade got 20 years for killing no-one

>>217725255
>I told him if you don't turn your phone down I'll take my phone out and put it on loud and at this he became extremely scared and left the shop

right

life has a funny way ofsneakingupyuawheneverythingsok

>>217725183
no i was playing around with my profile trying to improve it in hopes of getting more matches. so far ive only had one and match and im unsure she was a real person, in any case it turned out she lived in Prague so i ghosted and she unmatched

wair nevermind i just remembered i'm supposed to be getting a haircut tomorrow so i'll definitely need some opies to get through the small talk, maybe a bit of speed as well so i don't nod off
>>217725278
you know what's even worse than a junkie? a judgmental prat, that sort of behaviour is why you're an incel

diet starts tomorrow lads

I'll quit junk food and start losing weight tomorrow

>>217725285
No, I asked him how he'd feel if I pulled out my laptop and started blasting loud music. I didn't specify a particular genre. He just got more and more aggressive

>>217725298
well im not an incel. im in a loving long term relationship. partly due to not being a pathetic junkie. so thats you told isnt it *crosses arms and smirks smugly*

>>217725258
How much did you have?
ive had 800mg of tapentadol and lost count of how much pregabs, probably over 2000mg
but if i could get my grubby hands on real heroin id be shooting it asap

>>217725311
oh right did you think I was concerned about the distinction between tablet, phone and laptop in this exchange? You're quite mistaken.

https://youtube.com/watch?v=ckz5vbWizQE

>>217725323
2000mg since wednesday

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Big changes for Birmingham city centre!

We’ve installed hostile vehicle mitigation (HVM) bollards and upgraded CCTV at strategic locations to keep everyone safe in the city centre.

These measures stop hostile vehicles from entering pedestrian areas, so you can enjoy the famous Frankfurt Christmas Market with confidence.

Hear from Councillor Jamie Tennant and Iain Moran from Crowd Guard about how we’re making Birmingham safer.

#BirminghamSafe #CitySafety #FrankfurtMarket #SafeBirmingham

https://video.twimg.com/ext_tw_video/2001332780035100673/pu/vid/avc1/540x960/d9GCJ4K9PcLjZ-V0.mp4

IT'S LIKE RAIIIAIIIIAIININNNNNNN ON YOUR WEDDING DAY

Send them back. You know the ones.

>>217725341
2000mg over 3 days isnt that much, i dont think its enough for an od

out of all the ways to go overdosing on opiates is probably one of the best methods

>>217725360
was just singing this to myself a litttle earlier. the vibes transcend any distance

mums working from home again
Fucking bitch ruining my life

>>217725364
send rorkes back to their bedrooms at mummy and daddy's house?

>>217725356
Dat ratio

>>217725364
Me debating going back to the McDonalds counter when i get the last chips in the batch and they're all soggy and cold

>>217725397
Maybe you don't know the ones then

>>217725371
well i certainly feel like shit (but in a comfy way as is the case with opis)
i've got this unyielding tremor where i can't trust myself to hold anything without dropping it, my skin is dry and flushed, my legs almost give way under my weight if i stand up too fast, sometimes my heart wiill thumb with alarming force, my throat feels like it's semi-closed up, and i'm breaking out in hives all over bodyberg

>>217725381
Ironic, don't you think?

>>217725424
lad you need to take it easy dont traumatize your poor moth by making her find your corpse

Thread's a bit angsty for a Friday morning the week before Christmas

So how do gays not die from poisoning if they eat the poo poo then?

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ktim

>>217725463
sorry it's cos i was posting Alanis Morissette lyrics x

In the future Utopia, all streets and passageways will be lined with heavy steel bollards. People will be able to walk from location to location at complete ease as vans and HGVs crash into the outside of these bollards in a continuous stream however the design and implementation of the bollard system will mean that the walkway occupants feel only the gentlest smattering of debris as the bollards absorb 99.99% of the kinetic energy of the impacts.

>>217725479
>wasted the entire day
how have you managed that then considering its only 9 in the morning

>>217725479
ktim every day

bollardcel loves his bollards

>>217725496
It's a yank

>>217725424
well thats not good
i thought you had a big habit

>>217725506
irrelevant since /brit/ runs on one time zone no matter where you are like china

>>217725479
ktim 98% of the days that constitute my life

>>217725514
just getting back into it after 3 months or so on leave

>>217725496
my sleep schedule is messed up you see

>change freeze officially live at work
it like Christmas x

Some Utopians did ask why there was a constant stream of HGVs and vans hitting the outside of the bollards but these dissenters were fed into a machine to be ground into a paste and mixed in with cement for the creation of new bollards.

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Ralph Fiennes improves everything he's in

think my old friend from back in high school has come to resent me since started getting older and he started norwooding and i didn't

>>217725576
/tv/ is down the hall and to the left

might go into town and get last bits and bobs for Christmas x x x x x x x x x x

Seeing the gf in 9 days

>>217725594
Is she spending Christmas day with her bull?

>>217725591
need to do this myself but can't be arsed

I do need to though

>>217725608
Yeah in Kenya

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We can't take Venezuela

>>217725608
...yh
What's it to you?

>>217725591
Going to go to a posh jam shop at lunch and buy some jam

wonder how eye opening it would be to see the average day to day life of a billionaire, i know we already assume the obvious lavish aspects but the reality must be even more absurd than we can comprehend. even people in the lower 9 figures have an entire army of assistants to deal with every inconvenient day to day task, the tier above that must live like state capitals

>>217725631
you WILL die in Venezuela for some oil

>live like state capitals

today on phrases that mean nothing

>>217723369
UN-BELIEVABLE

>>217725644
if bill gate dropped a 20 pound note

>>217725644
I assume the average day is actually quite boring, lots of meetings and stuff

Football became gay after Torres left his prime

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>>217725657

I gave up with C it’s too hard I’m going python instead

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is Goldsmith a jew name like Silverstein?

OMG THE CAPTCHA SAID TJEW LIKE JEW OML HAHAHAHAHHAHAH TEEHEE!!! XDDSSDD

>>217725683
Nah. It suggests arduous work making gold. Jews don't make anything

should i go on 4chan a few mins a day or fully try quitting it? im never able to stay off here for long either way. want to quit until like feb feel so grim

he's living like Albany, New York

he's so rich he's living like Denver, Colorado

>>217725683
broke Jewish guy called Bronzefeld

Sleepy Joe Biden was, by far, the worst President in American History. Taking office as a result of the most corrupt Election ever seen in the United States, Biden oversaw a series of unprecedented disasters that brought our Nation to the brink of destruction,” part of the plaque reads. “But despite it all, President Trump would get Re-Elected in a Landslide, and SAVE AMERICA!

>>217725692
They made the iron dome

where is Diego with his much needed scripture in the run-up to Christmas

>>217725529
oh shit. yeah you have overdone it. 2000mg over 3 days isn't that much for my habit, but im not having a break till mid January. hopefully the withdrawals wont be too rough and im going to aim to stop for a few months. but even just a week long tolerance break.

>>217725683
ask yourself what profession you associate with the name and you'll have your answer

Just got my dog his Xmas prezzies I got him a squeaky pig toy, a long chicken bone and some small chicken treats

hungry jacks for tea

>>217725742
dogs don't celebrate christmas you utter runt

>>217725742
got my da's dog a jumbone and a bag of treats

>>217725743
what you ordering

>>217725703
Sir this is the British culture thread

yt ppl be like
>>217725742

>>217725754
you're right. they celebrate happy howlidays

Just another day in my dogshit incel life

i'd associate the name goldsmith with the profession goldsmith personally

Oh they've added one where the one of the letters is highlighted, great

>>217725757
the chicken hunger tamer meal because all their beef shit is grim

grabbing my disabled nan by the ankles and flinging her out the window

>>217725754
>>217725773
I’m not gonna wrap it up like just gonna give it him on the day grow up

>>217725726
yeah i have heard one of the main reasons why junkies end up dying is because they relapse and go straight back to the doses they were taking at the peak of their tolerance
i was fully aware of this but i still barrelled ahead cos i'm a retard

>>217725795
even the whopper mate?

he's just kind of in his own lane you know

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my instagram is just pages and pages and pages of this, non stop arse and tits

crakkkaz be french kissin they labradors

>>217725826
Why is 8GB of ram good in 2026?

>>217725826
Probably not healthy desu

>>217725826
mine is just guys working out and football. I don't care for either

>>217725816
haven't had one in like 10 years tbf but i remember them being grim

>>217725692
>Yes, the surname Goldsmith has Jewish origins, particularly among families of German Jewish descent. It is derived from the German word for "goldsmith" and is associated with notable Jewish banking families, such as the Goldschmidt family.
The AI jew detector pinged the name and started playing horst wessel lied.
https://archive.org/details/youtube-cYu3YAsqFbs

>>217725701
keeek

>>217725739
medieval banker.

>>217725836
expensive innit

>>217725827
Why do you always act as if you aren’t white

>>217725826
>consuming the electric jew

>>217725826
incredibly indian behaviour jesus man

>>217725826
who is bottom right

thriving, in my lane, teaching english, japanese GF, spending time with her family, bun in the oven, gonna be a father

>>217725862
tickles me pink whenever someone uses the most obviously ironic niggerspeak imaginable and some autist thinks they're being serious

>>217725889
vpn larp award

gfberg bought my family dogs a chrimbo prezzie. couple of chicken and bacon flavoured nylabone chew toy things. they'll love it x

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>>217725885
Went to check but it had already refreshed sorry

>>217725827
Katy gettin' dat pedigree chow rn omg

was watching this porn film the other night and it was one about milfs in their 40s and 50s shagging younger men in their 20s and 30s
and right after i finished i had to do the needful and ask myself why am i even watching geriatric hags with flappy beef curtains and horrible saggy tits, much less wanking to it
so anyway yeah, that's why i don't like the jews

>>217725909
>3 exercises for glute growth
well? what are they?

>>217725826
you been finally starting accepting everything lately lad?

>>217725826
giving women access to the internet was a mistake

>>217725856
The Jews being non-white has always been a ridiculous/pol/ fantasy. How else have they been able to integrate seamlessly into European inner circles for millenia

>>217725910
#needthat

>>217723369
TORRES IS ONSIDE AND ALL ALONE HERE
HE COULDN'T COULD HE

>>217725909
stopped going on instagram because this is basically the same as mine and everytime I went on I'd end up wanking

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>>217725916
>geriatric hags with flappy beef curtains and horrible saggy tits
nice

been coughing up brown sludge for 9 months

>>217725916
screm

long press on them so the drop down menu comes up and select 'not interested' then once you've done that to all of them refresh and keep going until you have something more interesting

if a woman wants to show her naked arse on instagram it's her right you CHUD

>>217725826
Do you think some bloke in India or Bangladesh Instagram feed looks like this or would it be brown girls?

i want xfiles scully to give me a footjob

why is keira knightley in a m&s advert? doesnt pirates of the caribean money make you set for life. why do celebrities need to keep working all the time? is it all just lifestyle creep? why do they lack such self control?

fart slave (24)

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>>217725979

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>>217725993

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>>217725987
> working
You think that’s work nigga?

>>217725987
M&S is a British cultural institution. It's not about money, it's a privilege for celebs to be invited to participate in their iconic Christmas ads

>>217726003
37 year old tumblr fujo humour

>>217725993
skinner was so based

>>217726024
hope you OD and die

>>217725999
Bro's doing the pose

>>217725895
keep it 100 bruh

I'm at this stage where I have accepted that I'm a francophile. I didn't want to be accociated with abnoxious "look how cultured I am" travel vlogger types that give French culture a bad name but it's unavoidable. I wish I were French.

>>217726006
so its just narcissism and staying famous for its own sake. thats retarded. fame just brings increased costs which necessitate more work

m&s is a declining influence . it's not like it was when my gran would go there to get a fancy dinner for a party

i dont actually hope that, i let my negative emotions get the better of me and said something cruel

>>217726032
wasnt being derogatorial

>>217725987
is that the one where joe wilkinson is her husband? bit unrealistic isn't it

>>217726024
>>217726032
same person btw

>>217725910
mad how they just like us but they don't be attracted to women and sheiet

>>217725987
productive conscientious people have a drive to do work of some kind
only dole scrounging wastemen think becoming rich so they can do nothing all day is appealing

>>217726056
no but we are in bed together rn

Eate your top 5 french porn actresses lads
>1. Anissa Kate
>2. Melissa Lauren
>3. Angell Summers
>4. Nikita Bellucci
>5. Lou Charmelle (only last on the list because she fucks the most niggers)

>>217726055
yeah it would be more realistic if it were me instead and also there was an extended edition with a 30 minute unsimulated sex scene

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well rorke, he does have a point

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>>217726056
you got me haha

>>217726073
low vibrational post

>>217726066
>smiling into a camera
>productive

M&S customer base has a 1:1 overlap with TERFs so it makes perfect sense for Kiera Knightley to front their advertisment.

No one who believes any of that woke tranny guff shops at M&S so they know they can hire based Kiera and they'll actually gain customers + increase revenue rather than the opposite. M&S stalwarts are happy to spend a little extra this Christmas knowing that M&S' morals align with their own and that M&S isn't afraid to call out the troon menace.

>>217726085
That’s crazy you lot are weird

plants vs zombies peashooter blowjob

>>217726079
Would rather go extinct amongst my own people

>>217726101
we do a little trolling!

>>217725987
ego usually (not necessarily a bad thing btw)

>>217726092
let's see you do it then oh wait you can't because you're an ugly cunt

might have to kill myself after today's wordle

Covering my knob in peanut butter at my local dog park

>>217726079
*checks early life*
yep, checks out

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>>217726101

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>Would rather go extinct amongst my own people

I slightly feel like London is something of a security blanket "proxy" for actually leading an interesting life for a hell of a lot of people.

I'm not denying that it offers a rich lifestyle opportunity for some people but for a he'll of a lot more it's a case of; "got absolutely zero concept if what you want out of life, no real personality and a bang average degree? Just "default" to London!

Then, when your relative/schoolfriend/former teacher asks what you’re doing now, instead of "i work in it" you can say i work in IT..... In London!".

Those two magical words seemingly transform mundane things into an exciting sexy world of bright lights and fast paced living, even though most of what you actually do is just trudge to the tube, endure the journey in, sit in a cubicle all day, repeat the journey back and stop off at Waitrose for some booze on the way back, maybe a Franco Manca or a GBK if it's the weekend.

Nobody will hold the fact you're now in your early 30s, still single and living in a flat share against you because you're in London right? That's just what exciting sexy big city types do; you don't say anything but it's just assumed you're single because you play the field and you flat share because you stay up long into the night having deep intellectual conversations and raucous dinner parties with your flat mates who are fellow members of the London elite. (Reality; you generally eat dinner alone in your bedroom with the telly on; your housemates are all vaguely threatening central Europeans who barely acknowledge your presence.)

>>217726111
Just weird talking to yourself tho like get a grip freak

shitting on the cat

>>217726079
He's unironically Jewish so no his point is null and void

not a single word

FATHER CHRISTMAS
GIVE US SOME MONEY

I need to return something but I’m too scared to go to the post office :(

>>217726136
>>217726129

>>217726136
nothing weird about it

>>217726156
did they accidentally post you a pair of balls?

>>217726079
Why are they like this
Do they really have so little self-awareness or do they just not care

Any use the flashlight on your phone to check your poo after a shit guys in?

>>217726167
I do that with my phlegm. A bit more greenish these days

>>217726167
no why would i do that?

keira shitely doing a shite in your mouth

>>217726167
its like a gacha game i like when you unlock worms and blood

find it amusing when the rorkeosphere talk about piers morgan and his "agenda"
he literally doesn't have an agenda, he's a total nihilist whose so-called principles can turn on a dime if he's offered enough money and status and tikka masalas

>>217726116
it is a bad thing. a very bad thing

Watching Eddington. Lots of covid/BLM stuff not sure where they're going with this.

going into town later to pick up a blu-ray to give to my father for christmas. I will be going to HMV to try and get it there. If they don't have it, where else can I go? What are some other brick and mortar shops that sell blu-rays? I can't buy it on amazon like a normal person as I'm seeing my dad tomorrow.

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Which one are you

/brit/ sucks up to celebrities more than fb these days nice alternative culture you have there

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what’s the catch here because it’s tempting

>>217726218
*rapes you*

>>217726122
got it in 4 thats a cruel word to choose

>>217726214
ausralain

2 christmas nights out planned tonight but told both of them i could go because i was going to the other one so i could skip out to see avatar on opening night instead

>>217726200
Literally nobody in this country takes Piers Morgan seriously mate

>>217726214
feels weird to use the words "aboriginal" or "indigenous" when talking about europeans even though it's an accurate description

>>217726232
screaming

>>217726214
>native Britons
Native Britons are not english whoever made this is fucking retarded

>>217726208
At the end of the day, any man who is worth hundreds of billions of dollars is going to get his nut however he wants it, exactly how he wants it, from exactly who he wants it from, in whichever way he specifies. The laws don't apply to these people. They never will. And you'll do nothing because there's nothing you (or I or anyone) can do.

>>217726238
aye but the yanks do, yanks think any middle aged man with an RP english accent must be an authority on literally every subject. you lucked out if you have that accent

>>217726234
yea it was a conspiracy to nuke the 5 catholic people in japan

>>217726206
>Set in 2020 during the COVID-19 pandemic in New Mexico, the film examines the political and social turmoil caused by the contested mayoral election fought between Sheriff Joe Cross and Mayor Ted Garcia.
Wew lad that sounds like the worst thing ever

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>My weirdest Christmas: my wife and I got food poisoning in Thailand – then made a very bad decision

>>217726234
based, grill the papists

>>217726222
I don’t know because I doubt 350,000 people are going to enter the raffle to cover the cost of the car

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£18K is not enough compensation for letting the world know how much of a pussy you are

>>217726166
Care about what?

>>217726274
he looks like a lesbian cancer patient

>>217726238
maybe 10 years ago that was true but you'd be surprised how thick people are now
got bumper stickers in this country now

can't put my freshly-wrapped chrissie prezzies under the tree lest i run a serious risk of catberg tearing them to smithereens

oim bri'ish kangaroos and cowboy hats mate

>>217726213
cex

bruce thinks his presents are safe where they are the idiot
i'm gonna get them I'M GONNA GET THEM

getting blacked by a veiny 12 inch BBC

https://i.4cdn.org/tv/1766137906063975.webm

>>217726274
>Mendelson

>>217726274
I’ve been cape verde

MAKE IRELAND BRITISH AGAIN

>>217726322
Poor kid, you know he's about to get his head caved in when the parents find out

shrouching

cumming all over a crt tv so the static cooks it into a spaff omelette

>>217726345
nis is bulgarian

chicken and greek yoghurt goes off

>>217726303
decent shout, I'll give them a try if required

I also thought of Forbidden Planet, I can try them too

ever snoop on your presents as a kid lads? back in 2010 i'd asked for red dead redemption 1 for crimbo, and when an conspicuously xbox 360-shaped object wrapped in gift wrapping appeared under the tree, i did a bit of surgery on it and extracted my copy of rdr earlier than planned, put a case containing one of my other games back in the wrapping, and proceeded to finish rdr in a few days, then i put it back and pretended to act surprised when i opened it back up on christmas day. 'twas the perfect crime.

>>217726366
yoghurt wank soon

my hair looks good today, shame about my face and body and everything else

>>217726376
get in

>>217726346
he deserves it

>>217726383
?

>>217726374
bet your life's a mess at this point because you never learnt the benefits of delayed gratification

>>217726351
Honestly let it be Bulgarian desu

>>217726384
Aye probably but kids are kids, they can't control their emotions properly yet, I used to rage horrendously at video games when I was his age and chew through my clothes in anger lol

>>217726391
actually what i learned was i can just take whatever i want and if no one stops me then it isn't wrong

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Almost Xmas

>>217726410
Are you Hitler in 1938?

>>217726382
requesting immediate status report on your willy, over

fucking crapping in the shitter

>>217726374
One year my sister was enjoying asking me what I thought she'd got me and eventually I just went into her room and ripped a small hole in the present I knew was mine. Then the next time she asked me to guess I coyly delivered the correct answer and she became really upset, accusing me (correctly) of having gone out my way to ruin the surprise since the gift itself was pretty much unguessable naturally.

I felt bad. Looking back, there's loads of incidents like that from my childhood where I demonstrated very unpleasant behaviour. I think I've been unlikable my whole life.

>>217726430
sc

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out at midday before the toil christmas party at half 6 I'm going to be a fucking mess

have a nice long veiny willy that barely sees any use it not right

>>217726422
status normal
like a tiny elephant's trunk

ever give the top of your scalp a rub and think "hmm, that feels a little thinner than the hair around my back and sides" and then spiral into a state of norwood anxiety?

mumberg bought voulevants for the chrimbo party tomorrow. get in

just finished my breakfast lads
eight quorn mini cocktail sausages and a pint of orange juice

>>217726450
im on the norwood express cuh, i know my fate and we're rapidly approaching the terminus

>>217726443
get the bags in, sort you right out

>>217726417
nyc is so cool

>>217726450
yes actually
of course i do have a giant bald spot on the back of my head so it makes sense for me to do this

>>217726463
get in the 'asteride and 'xidil pronto

>>217726486
fuck that shit
i have accepted my fate

>>217726450
Get anxiety about crownberg every few weeks but it keeps holding up

fruit salad
yummy yummy

found my virginity

have had a massive forehead my entire life yet my hairline remains the same. People will meet me, think I'm in the beginning stages of balding then 5+ years will pass and I look the same, just have a huge forehead

spaffing and scromitting

picture this
im a bag of dicks
put me to your lips
i am sick
i will punch a baby bear in his shit

*pictures this*

>>217726523
fucking screaming

New

>>217726528

>>217726502
yummy yummy
best served with Quorn x

>>217726523
:/

there's a woman at my work who is probably about 60 and she has the most humongous tits and arse i've ever seen. like a black woman's body but she's white

>>217726520
sounds like azealia banks lyrics

>>217726550
get her blacked PRONTO