Pork Scratching edition
nth for Juno
warnings: stephen's genitalia gets refered as "cunt" "folds" "slids" and "hole" or "front hole", his t-dick gets refered as "dick" or "cock", with wanda's genitalia didn't know how to refer to it because im a trans boy and i don't know how trans girls refer to their genitalia and didn't want to be disrespecful so i just used neutral terms like "womanhood" "length" or "hardness", and some specific parts like "tip" or "head", if a trans girls read this please let me know better and i will correct this asap. now about the "in a sense(?" tags i put them because wanda penetrates strange so thought it would be more correctly to put it like that, and with the very light cock and ball torture wanda just press very hard on some things(? and just that, it's me trying to put the common tags on trans porn, if you think is disrespectful please let me know! And about the fic, it's a dub-con, i tagged it, strange doesn't want it at first ofc but then gives in, obviuosly this is unrealistic and dub-con doesn't exist in real life (it's just rape), but this is an excuse for porn and for fantasies and blah blah, if isn't your cup of tea then don't read it! also there's heavy dysphoria dicussed on the fic, about how a trans man feels about pregnancy and being penetrated, if this make you dysphoric don't read it!, apart from that, the pronouns are respected and trans matters or heavy transphobia isn't discussed on the fic
https://youtu.be/MrY-XZ45Rfk
S I P B O Y S 2 0 1 7
>>219245826In your pathetic mind this jpg is your actual girlfriend.
pondering the important things in life like how do people get their big ass fridges into the house?
scran
>>219245875>big assfuck off yank
Right lads no naughty images I'm out in public
>>219245660bird at toil who looks identical to this right down to the fat facesuspect I have lingered a bit too long looking sometimes as she often has a face like thunder. Also her boyfriend works in the same building. I really cannot stress enough how much everyone at my work despises me
>>219245875You assemble it indoors
anyone else a bit bored at the present time?
>>219245886>one pieceGrim grim grim
>>219245875big strong man carries it in for you
>>219245900>I really cannot stress enough how much everyone at my work despises meNot much different here either
I support the complete and utter deportation of millions.
>>219245865in my mind this is just a cute character from a videogamethat's it
>>219245895shut up bitch i'll say what i like
>>219245922no you're mistaken I'm a well respected figure here
>>219245875peng houses typically have a loading door for bringing furniture and stuff in and out
MotherI'm bored mother
um wtf
Off to Solaris anybody want nowt
all i ever wanted was to have lots of uninhibited creampie sex with attractive women without having a pay for it with neither money nor emotional labour, is that SO much to ask?
Cuddling the cat
Best The Smiths song?
tooting, wandsworth
>>219245997stfu you gay mongo
>>219246008The racist one
99% of people are cattle
>>219245875Used to deliver white goods and sofas, usually just a matter of finding the right angle, but occasionally we'd take the fridge doors off or sometimes the front door/kitchen door etc. doorframes too if need beFor sofas we were told to bring it back to the warehouse so it could be partially disassembled and then someone would assemble it in the person's house, but that usually costed the customer and they'd have to wait longer, so we'd do our best to get it in for themGood job that, would occasionally get decent tips for simple jobs like taking the door off and putting it back on
>>219246030wonder if I am
>>219246008well i wonderor half a person
>>219245977surely a japanese salaryman husbando whose wife had 3 kids to take of at home would just relieve his sexual urges upon some 18 year old Shinjuku whore in a love hotel rather than have a go on his tired, bored wife who evidently hates him
>>219246011I taught my dog to play the trumpet on the London Underground. We went from Barking to Tooting in half an hour.
>>219246008for me it's a toss up between 'that joke isn't funny anymore' or 'last night I dreamt that somebody loved me'
>>219246059screamnig
>>219246059Howling
>>219246019would vaporise you on the spot with a swift right hook if you said that to my face, they used to call my fist the two-for-one because it would kill you and cremate you in one goyou think before you speak next time
>>219246059tooting
>>219246080>they used to call my fist the two-for-oneAye cause you used to finger guys arseholes and wank them off at the same time
>>219246035had to help grandparents move a sofa and getting it through the doorway was such a pain in the arse. couldn't do that every day
>>219246008How Soon Is Now if I’ve had a few bevvies otherwise it’s Barbarism Begins At Home
feels good being the funniest poster in the thread
It's party time
>>219246040no x
>>219246132yeah I knowx
>>219246141Ummypoppies
*gives umbunny a scritch-scratch behind the ear >w<*
>>219245802is this the brit version of chicharron?
>>219245977Quite enjoy the disinterested sex tropeThere's this one JAV where the girl's on her 3DS while getting stuff with 4" big jap cock, good one that is
>>219246132the funniest people are also the most depressed. that's why they're always making jokes to hide their sadness
Mother, oh motherPlay the pornography mother
>>219246102your IP has been traced and a squad of the ADF's most highly-trained commandos have been dispatched to your locationhope you're happy with yourself sunshine
Ordered me tea on Just Eat and my delivery code is 67 x
>>219246257scream x
Going to unleash the foulest liquishite on the next unoccupied john
>>219246233alri random image with text on facebook
Tottenham Hotspur relegation
>>219246257let us know the delivery driver's name when you get it x
>>219246257That's a right laugh that is, what a belter
>>219246257you should do a fode face and do the 67 thing when the brown guy delivers your food x
>>219246278goodness me...got any more?
>>219245886Well, I'm not sure what is there. However I think I want some. Watching BeardMeatsFood I had to look it up and seems like it's basically never the same depending on who makes it. I see cabbage, maybe what looks like mushy peas. Not sure what it's on top of. Still wanting some
right well
Lads, you'll never guess which house number I live in. Hint: it rhymes with bix beven
should I learn how to make games
>>219245802yummy thing that
>>219246298yh...you'll have to wait though, need to delete this and wait to play around jannys programming
>>219246311Ask ChatGPT
>>219246257the delivery code is the last two digits of your phone number nowadays dafty x
Got a stomach bug, lads. Tender all over and missing out my arse
>>219246225It's universally popular in the NORF, especially Denmark and also Germany.
right well that's my arsehole destroyed with a dragon dilder
Oh my days, 67. What a belter
>>219246311you've missed the boat
>>219246368ummo
>>219246225Looks more like crackling. Instead of just the skin it has the fat layer attached. If it is the same much harder, may break a tooth.
>>219246374
You lads are off the wall
so the news says curt cocaine didn't commit sudoku
rorke's so-called front hole
>>219246368for me, the prospective arsewanking implement
>>219246416you should probably dry it off first
cant remember how to speak to peopleeveryone talks the same way now and I don't know what they're sayingeven my posts on /brit/ used to be funnier
Bradley Walsh would laugh so much at the number 67
>>219246416Walk me through a sesh with that one please
>>219246436Poo screaming, screaming out my arse
>>219246454his what?
67
>>219246436No he wouldn't. He'd be like "Alright well I don't get it" and you would see his nasty side like when he's talking to contestants on Blankety Blank.
>>219246408
blacking a bradley
>>219246351>>219246401hmm, I'm pretty sure it's what we call pork rinds, the same thing as chicharronhere's the dude that makes it by my house in Mexico
Bradleymaxxing
pint of soya milk for me de lads
going on a valentine's date with ruby tonight
>>219246489he looks like el tortuga from brba
been posting all our lives posting in 190s paradise
>>219246487Islam cannot come fast enough
would pay good money to block any content on my browser that originates from africa, india, the middle east, south america and southeast asia
>>219246511that gives you man tits
>>219246528Was that the name of your mum's bull, and her review of him?
Reckon at least 1 person in each DINK couple secretly regrets their decision but has to put on a front and pretend it's the best feeling ever.
i don't shag
>>21924654367
mad that these ugly bastards are our cousins
>>219246519screa
>>219246541this has been debunked
a bradley, blacked
>>219246544>DINK????
favorite cut of beef to scran?
>>219246569Bradley Walsh
bradley blacks
>>219246556>uglyno
>>219246602erm
>>219246556Women would fuck these lads
>>219246059hollering
mad how this is the best joke ever told on tv
Sir Buried Penis
>>219246602women find this attractive
Right so that's a guy in a tub with his hairy little willy out
>>219246655how is horseberg?
tubby in the tub with a chub
>>219246630pretending to be under 18 still gets you perma banned
https://youtu.be/dCxPiZF6tdQ
>>219246646ktimdo i need surgery
Blood in my poo ladsThat’s me with the old bowel cancer then int it
Isn't it a bit weird that Americans attack each other over Thanksgiving celebrations and the genocide of native Americans when actually it was the English that were largely responsible for it allFeels a bit like when you fart and someone else gets the blame, an almost devilish feeling
>>219246683What for
Bobbi Huyton (né Hadgraft) sex arse
>>219246703"This user is underage"
>>219246677There are other svens posting in this thread, weirdo
>>219246715Scream you just got bro perm banned
>>219246710>né*née
Which side is right?
>>219246730Good
>>219246749Scream
screambled eggs
acreaming
wonder what we'll have for tea tonight
>>219246884i've got steak
Shifty looking bunch about today
Just lying on my bed. Feel tired but don't want to nap. Need to break the cycle. I need to be strong.
>>219246884i'm invited? yay!
>>219245826cute
>>219246569just eat the head meraw
>>219245896wish I had a gf like this but alas
Forgetting to breathe of my own accord
The two fat pigeons, whom I think love each other, are sitting on branches
>>219246929yeah you're invited, to your own house
>>219247008cute
Why aren't you fucking women?
could’ve had a German girlfriend when I was 19 but I fucked it because I thought I was too good for a foreign.now I’m sad lonely dickhead
>>219247008open my kitchen window and two pigeons live on the windowsill and two more live on the windowsill right across the alleyway
>>219247059cos they're chad only
>>219247012oh yeah haha that's what i meant erm
You can come over to mine for tea in Shrewsbury if you like. It's sandwiches for tea (probably tuna and salad cream) and we have to go to bed early because I have work tomorrow
>>219247059got 'pression
>>219247008get a single stone thrown at them
>>219247090You don't live there
>>219247090can i shag you rotten?
>>219247090Sounds like a right teddy bears picnic
>>219247059Alcohol is better.
not trying in life because the west is over
>>219247059not worth having to spend time with them
>>219247114Yeah I do in the Sundorne area>>219247116No>>219247122I got lots of stuffed toys including Pokémon ones
If you’re a yank and don’t live in NY, CA or TX you’re a mugwhat are you doing maaaaaaaate
>>219247124Why don't you get a cute Muslim gf?
had an anna de ville wank
>>219247151>Nocmon lassi'd be like a rat up a drain pipe with you
>>219247163Don't want to get honour-killed.
>>219247151literally 1hr awaycould come and suck you off
>>219247059she has grim feet
Waiting till it's dark so I can leave the house
no one care me
>>219247059got the mumps (as in im mumpy all the time not the actual disease)
>>219247204good post>>219247216how do you know this
>>219247208you live in exeter, don't you
>>219247176eva de vil for me
sad how internet forums are largely dead and a thing of the past
>>219247151We could watch plays together and fall half asleep dreaming idly of winter days and promises not kept
Pisses me off how much pussy Tony Soprano gets, especially in season 6
watching the conjuring
>>219247247move onin the grand scale of things they didn't last very long at all
>>219247238how does that make any sense
Rugby is on. Oh wait /brit/ is a lower class general
>>219247151Prove it
>>219247235what does that mean
>>219247288Was going to sit in spoons for hours but its packed to the rafters with the projectors on
>>219247269Rather not honestly
Everyone is having sex today
>>219247288
>>219247309That time of the year is it?
dipping chicken crimpy shapes in hummus
suppose a great big massive curry is in order
>>219247307its a classic
>>219247295all of the above
>>219247293Why do you want to know where she lives mate?
How was Deegz yesterday?
Islam is a great religion and nobody has the right to insult it.
he should change that
>>219247340wish i had good indian places near me
>>219247229I care you <3
>>219247357same as ever
>>219247363
>>219247351So I can send flowers for Valentines Day
>>219247382petition your local government
>>219247402but that'd mean more of those
>>219245865https://youtu.be/oa5ZSpXtqNM?si=QEr_cv-KOx06RF2u
>>219247382wish I had no indians near me
>>219247279nah don't think I will
>>219247430oh alright then
>>219247393Really, why are you so interested though? Not the first time I’ve seen you do this
>>219247415if you want the rainbow, you have to put up with the rain
>>219247444what is cvp
i used to relativity normal and now im insane and mentally ill
>>219247441alri confucous
poo
>>219247468dont think he ever said anything of the sort
>>219247440You got me I like to antagonize posters here by calling them liars x
Feeling a bit of a knob going out for a platonic dinner with a woman on valentine's day now
>>219247468>confucousxreaminbg
>>219245826Hat made for floofing
>>219247504s5748ujymh
shagging my granplatonically
scrambobuling
raping my nan
nth for the holodem
whats it to be
hiding my nan's things (she has dementia)
fish eating poo from frogs bum . mp4
might have a wnak
>anime fuck off nonce
crying and weeing
>>219247551
>>219247571All natural method
>>219247571they're the africans of whgite people
ok i decided on a laptop finally and didn't kill myself
might just get steaming again then it's impossible to be bored while steaming
>>219247607s
>>219247602Macbook?
>>219247571Friendship ended with Alexei Navalny
>>219245873Emiru finally catching heat mwad, she could do no wrong tee-hee™
>>219247602What laptop did you get?
>>219247602you got the shit one that overheats after 6 months didn't you?
Might treat myself to a valentine's day 'cide
>>219247644>>219247647twinkpad
gf has her knob out
>>219247602if it's not an ARM macbook then you fucked up
>>219247616You're an uninteresting person
>>219247669um
https://youtu.be/89tYqyNyOiI?si=_JRdKm7rOJtrhiSM
>he really bought a stinkpadOh no no no
kekkkk
he's really here all day every day. MAD
>>219247692not bought it yet, what's wrong with them
>>219247670
Enjoying the new ads
>>219247712>>219247675
>>219247697Never got stabbed in Vienna, but it's a smol city compared to London (2M people instead of 10M)
>>219247740wienerlad
>>219247719The advertisers must love youGetting more exposure for fucking free
thinkpads are only good when they're the really old ones (that stink) and you install some meme linux distro like gentoo or arch onto and if you're a troon
>>219247736you're in a cult
I swear to fucking God if my retarded dog barks one more time at full volume Im gonna stomp him
>>219245802
Apple Silicon is great until you realise you have to use MacOS to get the most out of it
>>219247776u speaking from experience hun x
i dont bloody think online safety act allows it
Every fucking middle class striver cunt gives their kids names ending in -ie or -y these days. Millie. Amy. Bobby. Frankie. Sick to the bastard death
>>219247787keeping pigs indoors is fucked up
why's this thread full of jfs then
>>219247838
>>219247784Does he bark in Italian?
>>219247822Work in the registers office do we
>>219247776Sounds like they have congealed cum and cheeto dust in the keyboard
recycle etc>>219245805>>219245805
>>219245805>>219245805
>>219247784Dio cane
>>219247909Kek
>>219247805hey, I do NOT use arch linux
>>219247902ᓀ‸ᓂ
>>219247916Do you wish you were her?
>>219247776ThinkPads absolutely shag for anyone that actually enjoys technology. Even the newer gens are decent for the repairability alone. Though nowadays that's beaten by Framework's lappies. Would love one of those if they weren't so expensive. I hope the modular gimmick catches on, could be huge for reducing ewaste
>>219247740tragic, vienna should rule the the carpathians
not announcing a report though was it?
I reported all of them and more
>>219248015If we anschluss'd Hungary the combined Kingdom would only be more chuddy and less diverse and prone to stabbings.
got small weak lungs me
>>219247822>t. Tom
Bump
