liz stokes edition
Stroking to Liz truss edition
the new
just woke upfrom my alarm no less
Drank some water just then.
>>219443364ktim
and now we go to tarquin for his latest
4 sainsburys taste the difference belgian milk chocolate cookies down the hatch
>>219443364Hope it had Giardia in it and you shit yourself inside out
>>219443364Americans flavour their tap water with sugarSorry 'flavor'I hate them so much /b/ros
>>219443385how do they compare to the tesco finest ones
Getting so redpilled it's mental
get the kittens eaten
>>219443385peng
>>219443382
>>219443396With Jewish seltzer machines made by Palestinian slave labour
Todays eats>breakfastNothing>lunch16 pieces of sushi, 8 falafel balls>dinnerPeanut butter on toast, nicotine gum
Got my bedtime story on about the conquistadors conquering the pagan aztecs
>>219443385>sainsburys taste the differencetheir 'zzas are very good
>>219443408overall the 'burys cookies are nicer but the tesco finest mint choc chip are the best of the bunch
>>219443429Fishy fish sushi is legit rank, I only eat teriyaki chicken (the pride of Australia), fried chicken and tempura salmon sushi
>>219443448bold statement, will give them a go next time i'm in sainos
>>219443434kino time period
>>219443449My one today was 8 prawn and mayo ones and then 4 teriyaki chicken/4 tuna.
>>219443434Leftypol disagreeing that the Inca civilisation perceived Pizarro and his retinue as gods
>>219443434audiobook or podcast?
consider the pangolin
Leftypol being right about incas Rorke being wrong about Incas
>>219443483he cute
>>219443471>tuna sushiI'm not a picky eater but the one thing I can't stand is canned tuna
>>219443483odd fellows
when will it end
here's to you, ahab!https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LDkmaNfBOtU
>>219443488That is being picky. Canned tuna is yummy and a great source of protein. The Smokey flavour is lush on toast. Like sardines too me and anchovies me
nobody care me
>>219443494Rupert will bring back good weather
>>219443483it's just a trans armadillo if you think about it
Proposing that instead of /brit/, we called it /the brit/
>>219443501canned tuna is grimcanned salmon is so-socanned sardines are peng
>>219443501Also a great source of mercury and it smells way too fishy. The best fish doesn't taste like fish
>>219443505she looks like someone but i don't know who
>unstud uv brut we called it thu brut
>>219443540You’re meant to eat it, not smell it. Sniffy ahh nigga
>>219443522more like /the shit/
tuna mult
>>219443560yes that is me
reds on today lads
rorke muttering something to himself
>>219443522good idea! even better if we streamline that and just call it /brit/
tuna pizza
>>219443543maria sharapova?emily blunt?kt tunstall?lea seydoux?
imagine it being the 1700s and medieval times were only 300 years ago
Australians be like ‘that’s me off to red rooster’ lmao
>Kiwi doesn't know that smell is the reason why you can tasteChur bru!I don't know why we haven't annexed you larpers yet, it would be so easy (and legal under international law, like our constitution has 100 year old provisions for striking Auckland with missiles)https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9y-yT7o6y6k
melt mentionedhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j3peRYECPVw
dogberg desperate for me to feed her
>>219443569big boy x
>>219443574/uk/
Wonder how different my life would be if I were into/good at football. Would've actually had social standing at school giving confidence for future endeavours
>>219443582
>>219443595post dogbergess
>>219443600/yookay/
>>219443592Why so violent and angry. Go down the beach and kick the feet up mate, we live in paradise
pasta e tonno alla vodka
>>219443602>endeavoursFOY
me watching the antipodeans make snide remarks about each other
So people with no smell can’t taste food? What are taste buds for then?
>>219443630banter
Ausunc spending nine dollarydoos on a microwaved hot dog roll with mayonnaise and chicken
Sorry mate, its our warrior culture.>>219443630>While taste buds on the tongue detect only five basic sensations (sweet, salty, sour, bitter, and umami), your smell detects the nuances and aromas that create "flavor". Without smell, food often tastes bland, flat, or less intense
>>219443602i think the only reason normoids tolerated me in school was because i liked football and didn't sound like a neek (even though i was one)
>>219443642with chicken salt?
need to complete xenoblade chronicles 2
>>219443481Audiobook >>219443467Still barely know about it me
Eliza McCartney sex arse
>>219443646>AI response Right, disregarding that muck
>>219443649I love her
>>219443609
The most valuable thing a parent can teach their child in this country is being good at football. Unless you're in a rich private school (born into success) every single social venue in this country revolves around football and how into/good at it you are
Reading Dune
>Yuss, YUSS>Lut the hate flew through you
>>219443612/the yookay/
just been conquered by a warrior son of australia
before we had screens niggas used to sit around the fire and sing folk songs to pass the timeimagine that
>>219443659nice one thanks
X him back
>>219443648If you get it in a combo the chips have chicken salt
>>219443646>warrior culture>loses the emu war>probably just whinged the whole time during the ANZACS>corrupt local councils and corrupt politicians>corrupt police>racism is rampant Righto
>>219443686same
you ever mourn the fact you won't have kids
>>219443679Genuinely good read that
>>219443687before we had screens people had to be friends with the people they happened to born close to in time and space
>>219443679Read that before, was good
having a hoot and a holler
I'd do you a photo of the diabolical poo I've just done but you probably wouldn't want to see it
>>219443668so this is rorke
>>219443702>>racism is rampantbased!
>>219443712>>219443714look at you two agreeing with eachother
>>219443707no because i might but also if i don't at least they won't inherit my gay retard genes x
morning gays
>>219443500Absolute banger https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2GgdpP-R4IY
>AI reponses summarising basic facts you learn in primary school is...le bad!This is why I would enlist to drop incendiaries on Kiwiland and create massive firestorms. Always remember, New Zealand began as part of Australia and is a part of Australia. This is an unfinished civil war. New Zealand will be returned to Australia by force if necessary.>>219443702>Won the Boer Wars for the British>Won the Boxer Rebellion for the Eight Nations Alliance>Won WW1 for the allies>Won the Pacific war for the USAustralia built the British Empire and singlehandedly routed JapanWe are the only nation in the world that has the right to erect churches because we are proof that god has blessed the nation of Australia. Glory to the Commonwealth of Australia, woe to our enemies.
>>219443707would be irresponsible for the likes of me to have kids, in fact i resent my dad for inflicting his mentally ill genes on me
>>219443735if kamala went on she would have won the election
>>219443755I wish she did
>>219443747Scared you'd be too tempted to shag them?
>>219443735>>219443755Where's the discussion of British culture? :/
do you think kamala has had sex since she lost
>>219443707I've never wanted kids and neither has the toilfu
Bit sloshed but an absolute Australian patriot (I hate the country and my countrymen and I want to leave as soon as possible)Reckon I'd do well in Germany
thinking about the september 11th attacks on new york city
me and my wife Yuno participating in Lent together!
>>219443771Nah, her husband looks very gay and effeminate>>219443707but I will have children
>>219443765my willy is small but not small enough to shag my own genes
>>219443777why germany of all places? Baffling choice
>>219443792i think about them every dayjust insanely mental
Pootoil then off to church for me
>>219443707if i had children they would likely be autism ridden bipolar freaks.
>>219443767You’re a faggot how’s that
>>219443707no they'd inherit my mental healths which wouldn't be fair they never asked to be born
>>219443810Must be a long poo if it's taking you two and a half hours
>>219443810Good lad
imagining a child who inherits my genes in addition to the genes of a woman mental enough to have a child with me
can't have kids in case they inherit my cursed colourblindness
>>219443828so he's inside raping the lady is he
>>219443804>Strongest economy in Europe>Liberal>Not elitist, no royals or unelected house of lords>Say it like it is culture, nobody is stuck up or arrogant>Cool language that is easy to learn for English speakers>Rich medieval-core history>Women are absolute knockouts>Food is good and they like bread>Central location in Europe so cheap trains and flights to everywhere>They actually care about intellectual academia>no minority-majority cities, less immigrants than the UKGermany is like the archetypal European country for me
>>219443833*sneaks up on you in an all-green outfit*BOO!
Must be one of the worst poos I've ever hadThe consistency was of something inhuman, something evil
>>219443828Screaming. Rupert would probably tweet this
>>219443831dont do it thats how we end up with creatures like heathermong
prostitute miscarried my kidthank god for crystal meth hey
>>219443837Nah Rupert came in his barbour jacket and double barreled shotgun (and licence)
>>219443831a truly horrifying combination
>>219443837probably, in gowondaland or wherever
>>219443850>something inhuman, something evilktim
>>219443850The poo demons
Kids names I'm thinking up>MaleVictor, Clement, Aleksandr, Maximilian, Jean-Luc>FemaleRowina, Sadie, Augusta, Katerina
wish i was a cowboy
just got spooked by someone in an all-red outfit
>>219443847>Strongest economy in Europe>no minority-majority cities, less immigrants than the UK>Say it like it is culture, nobody is stuck up or arrogantstrongly disagree with these ones
>>219443867Rorke mate...
>>219443867When I see a name like that I know their dad is a ginger and their mum is asian
>>219443867begging for them to be bullied ruthlessly
if i had a son i would name him adam and if i had a daughter i would name her dasha
>>219443847Give it 5years
>>219443867all fine names, good lad
>>219443867My nans best mate is called Sadie
>>219443871me as a patriot militiaman in the winter of 1778
>>219443847>Say it like it is culture, nobody is stuck up or arrogantyou've clearly never been there
HO HO HO HO
>>219443887After the reindeer?
>>219443828he should come here and do this>>219443856grim if true, I once had a girl tell me that she had an abortion years after we were hooking up, felt sad
>>219443903Why would she even tell you that? Bitch
>>219443826Service is at 9:30?
>>219443903it was loads (if you'll excuse the pun) of fun putting it in there
>>219443919not for memine's at 11am
>>219443874How so? Here in Australia we're told 'the UK is not like how you're taught in the history books, it's in a freefall decline, if you want to go over, go but milk it for everything it's worth, give nothing back and leave after 5 years'Germany in Australia is seen as well-developed, stable, strong and reliable.>>219443889And I bet the majority of those foreigners are other Europeans/Americans/Aussies'>>219443883>>219443884Why would a kid be bullied for being called Victor or Aleksandr? the only one I think might be a bit cringe is Augusta but it's certainly better than yet another Chloe or Sophie
was going to do something today but gave up
>>219443931>And I bet the majority of those foreigners are other Europeans/Americans/AussiesWell you should go :)
>>219443925Be honest there's an earlier one on you just don't want to get out of bed do you
Gus is missing
>>219443951Seems like a strange thing to lie about
oneyplays zach hypotheticals compilation
>>219443931well you can start posting in /duetchs/ or whatever cant you? *revokes your /britizenship/*
>>219443867Going to name my son Rudiger
>>219443918Because we got drunk probably. I told her you shouldn't have told m. She said she also felt bad in retrospect. >>219443920I don't understand, loads of meth or what? jizz
>>219443964I withdraw my comment
>An internal Green Party motion proposes a regulated market for all drugs, including partnerships with South American cartels for cocaine supply, NHS prescriptions for crack and meth, and drug education in primary schools.>Leader Zack Polanski, who has never used drugs himself, supports it as a public health fix to the failed war on drugs.Chat is this true?
>>219443931sorry mate I'm having trouble hearing what you're saying with that big hairy Kraut dick in your mouth
>>219443966You can take the bloke out of Australia but never take Australia out of the bloke. Australians are unique amongst the world, you can spot one in a crowd immediately. As a citizen of the successor state to the British Empire, I will always be welcome in /brit/>>219443970That is an awful name
>>219443981Well that was a kind and measured response
remember the huns
>>219443992The white huns?
There's a legal cocaine manufacture industry you could just expand that
>>219444010the ones that did rome in
aussie lads really lost a war to a bird
>>219444015big bird tbf
>>219443867Why specifically Aleksandr over Alexander? That's just asking for issues over spelling forever.
No hun ever sent Aussie boys to get shredded by Turkish guns while sitting back in a tent, sipping tea and laughing. No hun ever abandoned Singapore in the night while the Aussies were patrolling and left them to be tortured and starved to death by the Japanese. No hun ever called me an Antipodean. No hun ever sneered at me when I said I was Aussie.
>>219444012I'd like to get into that but I'll die of overdose.
>>219444018Piblington
mad how in the past you could just be a gaul in gaul and never know what rome was actually likeyou'd just have to hear about it secondhand
>>219444018It looks cooler. More masculine. Also nobody cares about spelling anymore.
>>219444015We gave up and went home, it's not the same as losingEmus are a bit like the Viet Cong in that respect
>>219444019*nukes your country a dozen times and gets away with it*
>>219444012They dont even support British business when theyre legalising drugs. Sad
>>219444038Can you stop feeding that meme bullshit. The only people who ever called it a war was (surprise surprise) pommy politicians mocking Aussies.
>>219444034load of shite
>>219444038it was a full tactical retreat then?
Happy Black History Month!Did you know?Cycling is viewed mostly as a White sport. But one of the fastest men ever to race on two wheels was Marshall Walter “Major” Taylor, an American who dominated sprint cycling in the late 1800s and early 1900s.A hugely gifted rider, Taylor won the first amateur race he entered, at 14. He turned professional four years later and continued winning races, most of them sprints around oval tracks at Madison Square Garden and other arenas in the eastern US.Soon Taylor was competing in races across Europe and Australia, becoming the second Black athlete to win a world championship in any sport.He did all this while battling bitter racial prejudice – often from White cyclists who refused to compete against him or tried to harm him during races. One rival, after losing to Taylor in Boston, attacked him and choked him unconscious.“In most of my races I not only struggled for victory but also for my very life and limb,” Taylor wrote in his autobiography.But this didn’t stop him from setting world records, drawing huge crowds and becoming perhaps the first Black celebrity athlete.
FUCK niggers, dude
>>219444057what do you mean by that
ausrorke be like "don't mention the emu war"
>>219444054just a bit of banter innit
>>219444037>it looks cooler. You see it hasnt got an E! And a K instead of an X its not like the English version. Of course i have a 100% english ancestry but I'll spell it like thisBrainlet
>>219444070no such thing as gauls or romansif it didn't happen within my life, it didn't exist.
>>219444037thinking of your son having to spell out his name for every appointment his whole life"yeah naur it's alexander with a k, no e at the end"screaming
>>219443867>maleErnest, Frank, Paul>femaleErin, Monica, AnnabelCan guess my surname quite easy x
>>219444099Schweinberg?
>>219444099Moscowitz-Sanchez
imagine it's the 5th century and you live in a roman province and one day the soldiers all leave for some reason and never returnand that's the last you ever saw of the roman empirethink about that
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Tj-w_zOjU24>I'm at the beach coming of molly
still don’t know the meaning of a ‘basket case’ but contextually i understand it and know when it to use it
>>219444118get in
>>219444123ktim
>>219444118The literal age of legends
>>219443730>>219443747>>219443776>>219443811>>219443822>same answer over and overYou've been manipulated. I don't need to tell you who by
>>219444139back to bed heatherpaedo.
>>219444118by the 5th century Rome was a bunch of mutts
>>219444123youre two pickles short of a pair of pickles you are
>>219443828Labour there's 5 of them. Green one theres 50 of them
>>219444149still roman soldiers aren't theyeven if they're actually all thracians they're still working for rome
>>219444148Who?
>>219444118Romani ite domum
>>219444149yeah and one day all the mutts left and the people who were left got invaded by a bunch of dutchmen
>>219444154never liked pickles tbqh
>>219444175Saxony and jutland famously part of holland
>>219444162
What the fuck
>>219444178what's the matter surstromming boy, afraid you might taste something?
>>219444188late rome gives me the creepsweird time period
>>219444187all just down the road from each other
>>219444193wonder how much white taxpayer money was spent on that
>>219444139>you should have children because.... ugh because I said so, ok??!
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=GevBwKwqGqEsmoov
mad how we don't know anything about the moon
>>219444193Legium pro Britannia
watched a musical in the theatre last night it was fucking shit never seen one before and it was exactly as gay as youd imagine. mark addy was alright though
>>219444207Dunno about creeps but yeah definitely weirdthe uniforms, the christianity, the eastern influences.you can see how clothing transitioned into the medieval period though
>>219444139well if a woman wants to have children with me she's free to
>>219444211by your standards maybe takes a full day to drive to your local corner shop down there
>>219444193Tee Enn Dee
>>219444225I can't stand musicals, they make me uncomfortable
raining again
Imagine living in the Roman Empire and your mum buys you a Germanic sex slave for your 12th birthday (this really happened).Think people praise Rome too highly teebeehaich, it was a bit of a shithole
might kms
>>219444249would never want a sex slave me, too emphatic and sensitive you see
you're the Crazy World of Arthur Brown
>>219444229It's a long way to the shop if you want a sausage roll
>>219444280I am the god of hellfire
>>219444266gonna miss you matex
>>219444273If you were a Roman with Roman sensibilities, you wouldn't view them as human. Mum would probably make you shag infront of the whole family as part of your birthday celebrations. Rich Romans were probably 1:1 with Epstein and co
>>219444273i'd keep her but just let her hang out because i'm such a nice personalso i would maybe have sex with her sometimes and i'm sure she would understand
women being sold as sex slaves is the only thing that could motivate me to find a job
>>219444214Pakis marry their cousins who are also their aunts. Pretty sure your undiagnosed mental health issues arent going to be a big problem
>>219444302yours would take about a month to be delivered
>>219444302right well then thats just a wee bit incellish isnt it
Turns out day 5 of no cannabis = diarrhoeaWhat the fuck
>>219444302Just in general? lol
>>219444273sex slave mong scribbling his stories into his wax tablet
>>219444298>wouldn't view them as humanBut slaves got their freedom regularly and even got paid
what's up niggas
>>219444320not as if big man hitchens didnt warn you
did berber languages sound similar to arabic before arabs got to north africadoes anyone know
>>219444320That makes no sense, didn't happen to me, it would actually be the opposite because weed is a diuretic
>>219444340Big man hitchens is dead, little man hitchens is a hypocrite who loves booze
>>219443867My skinhead sons (Kai, Kieron and Wayne) will bully the fuck out your kids
While there is no specific historical record of a mother buying a Germanic sex slave for her son’s 12th birthday, the scenario is historically plausible within the context of Roman social norms and slavery. In Ancient Rome, slaves were considered property (instrumentum vocale or "speaking tools"), and their owners had total legal control over their bodies, including for sexual purposes. Historical ContextSexual Initiation: It was socially acceptable, and sometimes encouraged, for young elite Roman males to have their first sexual experiences with slaves. Some historical sources mention fathers providing slave boys or girls for their sons to prevent them from becoming emotionally involved with freeborn women or "corrupting" themselves with high-status citizens.The Role of Mothers: Roman mothers, particularly in the elite class, were deeply involved in their sons' upbringing and social preparation. While buying a "sex slave" specifically for a birthday isn't a documented tradition, mothers did manage household slaves and were responsible for a son's transition into adulthood.actually mental
>>219444338it's all good, how are you
>>219444340>>219444352>Bu.t wha.. what about alcohol!Cant fathom how stupid the interviewer was not to understand the basic premise
>>219444320>day 5day 4, I'm getting ahead of myself>>219444351It's not something I expected either
>>219444337Not Germanic ones
>>219443931>Aleksandroh dear>What's your name cunt>Its 'Alexander' but spelled like a complete fucking mongoYou sound like some silly yank Utah tart who wants to make their kids names OC donut steel>Here's my kids Mikheylah and Braxtyn-Brixtyn
>>219444358Kai'i, Keishawn and Dewayne, more like
>>219444364So aussieberg made it up
>>219444273more of an irredeemable sexpervert at heart but also a bir of an empath due to high levels of estrogen from being alcoholic and also tricked from birth into being afraid of some cosmic retribution should i decide to become the heinous rapebastard of britain man me
>>219444375strange
>>219444311so your primary motivation for having children is to try and balance out the tide of brown yeah? I figured as much
>>219444390>Braxtyn-Brixtyngoing to build a robot so I can call it this now
>>219444391You're the dozy spastic who wants to spell your son's name like an absolute retard I'd wind your neck in
right well that's a bunch of birds flying over the thread
>>219444390Meanwhile in reality>What's your name cunt>Aleksandr>Yeah righto, my name's JackoMeanwhile in the UK>What's your name cunt>Mohammed >Wallahi, good name bro
WHEN *slam* DO *slam* I *slam* GET *slam* TO *slam* BE *spooge* EMPEROR?
dude weed lmao is the most overrated shit in existence and is actually bad for you, since all the studies when we were kids tested the weak reggie shit only nowadays it's all potent as fuck and will literally give you schizophrenia plus lower your iq by 10 points
some bird just shit on my last post
*drops my undies and curls out a massive shite onto the thread*
>>219444444Here's your (you)
>>219444414Dont think i said that or implied it. Simply reassuring you that your perceived faults in your genetics are not as bad as others literally having children
>>219444444Nice.
>>219444433what if I already had schizophrenia
arsenal spurs today, so I got that going for me
>>219444444:o
>>219444444:O
>>219444444really really really wish you would stop doing this so successfully
>>219444444
>>219444452Spurs will win 2-1also I just had some tuna pate from Tesco and it's SHIT so avoid it lads
i invented the reply to yourself gimmick
>>219444444script faggot
Just found out that this is me
>>219444457>>2194444588O
Your father gestures to the woman from Syria Palestina>Here my son, here is your first slave, I now pronounce you DominusHow do you respond?
>>219444448I think you've confused me for a different poster, the reason I don't want kids isn't because of some perceived genetic fault, both me and the toilfu are from excellent white British stock (although we both have quite poor eyesight)
i invented putting your chips in the lid of your burger box
I actually managed to did this one time but barely got any yous
>>219444433For me, it focuses me. I'm doing pretty well in life now. Many people I know drink alcohol a lot and smoke cigarettes or do coke or other drugs like religion or hard-core racismCannabis has simply worked out for me, and right now I'm simply paying the bill for having saturated my body with it to the absolute physiological maximumIf I'd used any other substance to this extend I'd be dead or dying
>>219444444how
might get stoned and watch dashcam crashes for 2 and a half hours straight
>>219444426>What's your name cunt?>Aleksa->Sounds fucking retarded cunt, anyway, I've just seen your dad in a dress having a wank in his car in the school car park so I've called the police
>other drugs like religion or hard-core racism
>>219444505Of course the leftypol mong smokes weed. All of your brains are scrambled by this shite
>>219444444I bear witness
>>219444500Every person who said they didnt want kids said it for some genetic reason. But thanks for sticking your oar in
>>219444193Only thing that makes this unbelievable is they could have engineer something this complex
>>219444444holly shit
>>219444518That only happens in the UKApparently you guys have a problem with grooming gangs? Never heard of that in Australia.
>>219444518Screeem
Just noticed that Mousey is that bullied monkey with the cuddly toy
>>219444518he's done you mate get over it
>>219444406like this a lot
>>219444520>>219444522Actually I was just making a reference to an Eric Clapton quote but you uncultured dunces missed it
>>219444505my experience with weed has been that the better you feel about yourself and how your life is going, the better the experience. When I smoked it during my long period of unemployment and loneliness all I did was sit there dissecting every moment in the past that I fucked up and it was horrible. Now my life is back on track I'm back to just feeling relaxed and giggly
>>219444534how much fucking time do you actually spend just trying to piss of uk flags on /brit/ this is genuinely ridiculous lad
wanktoil complete (xev)
>>219444518youve done him mate time for him to get over it
>>2194444440_0
>>219444505yeah classic weed cope>atleast it's not alcohol or cigarettes.. or racism!!just drink coffee like a normal person
>>219444444nice
>>219444543never heard of this grandunc until now
NEW>>219444560>>219444560>>219444560
>>219444554>or racism!wise up retard>>219444543And I do drink coffee. I'm fuelled by caffeine and cannabis
>>219444512I like to watch this https://vimeo.com/754181483
>>219444547Not enough.Did you know that in WW1 when British politicians heard in Parliament that 16 year old Aussie boys were getting mowed down in human wave attacks against defended Turkish positions ordered by British officers they stood up and started clapping and cheering?
>>219444591Reminder more brits died at galipoli and Australians were led by Australian officers
