the neurotic narrativisation of a totally innocuous situation and the subsequent emotional response edition
poo sмeIls
One personality from /brit/, don't want to name him but bear in mind he's always crying about "the parasite", keeps pleading with the jannies to ban basically every single unique IP in this general
>>220285914A hat! A hat for every word!
cute blonde boys from Bristol with a shy stutter <3
>>220287631you get used to them, and it's worth pleasing mistress
her hair is the wrong way around in this skinit should be black with a white streak
just eaten a fried egg buttybit of sriracha on for a laugh
>>220287746Make your first-ever friend tomorrow you boring cunt.
>>220287734apart from the fact youve never worn them for a woman, is there a size limit on them? are some willies too small to feel trapped? are some too big to be chained up? much to think about.
gandalf the gay
might watch a filmx
>>220287771screaming
>>220287779too late to put one on now
best city in norfern england?
Do I eat the expired Buldak sauce?
>>220287787The other week I watched all 3 of the original X men films. Really took me back
just sorted my van. feeling organised
>>220287746Got 3 sauces open and half full in the fridge right now Ketchup, encona hot pepper sauce, and mint sauce (love me mint sauce)CrazySoy sauce as well but that doesn't count cos it lasts ages
>>220287771i've had friends once, actuallyhave to resort to the /brit/ pals as friends nowsorry state of affairs
>>220287815saucelad loves his sauces
How was Timothy Byrne able to live and study in America? Was his mental illness not as severe then?
did mousey already confirm what the score will be? ive heard mixed rumours want to see the official statement
>>220287787wrong
Is it true you got bummed on a field?
>>220287830Living here will make you mentally ill
>>220287830he was just a normal man
How much did Clavicular grow and at what age?
>>220287815i see some of those hot sauces about in the shops, never tried them personally
always thought the muslims didn't eat ANYTHING during ranadan, maybe like some juice at night to see them through. but they just fast for the day and stuff their faces at night? many end up eating MORE food that before. not impressed at all
>>220287866holy fuck i've never seen this picdo you know what he studied?
>>220287829Who doesn't love sauces?I wish I had apple sauce open for these sausagesGot two jars of the stuff but can't justify opening ANOTHER sauce while there's already 3 on the go
>>220287830He was well enough to be an extra in various TV shows and adverts in 2010
>>220287889no, sorry
>>220287874If they're on offer you can't go wrong for £1.50 or whatever but there's a good chance it'll get binned Definitely try it though I love the stuff
>>220287830Apparently his brother became schizo in his early 20's so there was a history of it in the family, he eventually went schizo after working in IT (many such cases) before doing the actor thing for a while
that's it no more being a fat bastard. I'm going to drop 10kg, get back in the gym and sort it out, will be calorie counting and doing cardio
just sorted my nan. feeling organised
>>220287866genuinely depessing imagepray to god i don't become a schizoid or get parkinsons or something
Welsh primacy. Welsh excellence. Welsh domination.
My heels coming right through this sock like a tramp. Not cheap either, these ones. Oh well what can you do
>>220287975got battered last night LOL
hi
How has Timmy never accidentally revealed his siblings or anything?Like he's mad enough to post his cock spunking but not enough to be like "this is my sister who I see at Christmas and she brings me bits"
>>220287975went to Wales once its all fat goblin people
bouncy chocolate breasts hmmmm
>>220287969ahah xx
bloke beeped his horn at me yesterdaystill shaking
>>220288007state of this disgusting bender
>>220288022what were you doing wrong?
>>220288007fetal alcohol syndrome?
>>220288025that's a woman
>>220288007Take me to your leader
>>220288014think being a schizo you only really have thoughts of the self
>>220288014just don't care about this guy or any other brit celebrities, just dont care
>>220288032no mate. it's a man. he's just pretending to be a woman, you see?
>>220287974you dont become a schizoidyou either are or you ARENT"mate"
>>220288017really good post
>>220288046highly transphobic postdo better
HMS Sex Arse>'Intimidating' female Royal Navy sailor is found guilty of groping male and female shipmates after she 'picked victims who would not complain'https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-15684623/Royal-Navy-sailor-groping-shipmates-pinching-nipples-grabbing-genitals.html
>>220288016You went to a city full of AngloidsThe hills, the mountains, the valleys. The proud Welsh people have no taste for cramped urban biomass slums
Hi lads. I'm on the alcohol again tonight. My brain feels more and more dead by the minute
>>220288028was parked in front of his drive and wouldn't let him out
din dins still not ready, starving, suffering
>>220288014do they actually visit him? surely he would have found help years ago if anyone that cared saw the state of him
>>220288059maybe when he starts to do better with his impression of a woman
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g0fMnhx2zIM
Anyone got a nice smooth butt and pink hole man in?
>>220288066I'd report her to!
>>220288089She's a woman regardless of whether she fits your narrow beauty standards daft ape
here's that webm you were asking forhttps://i.4cdn.org/wsg/1774068475831281.webm
Have officially been invited to be a director of a ltd company
>>220288105No jog on
baby rorke>Schoolboy 'white supremacist', 16, is sentenced after sharing terror material and amassing arsenal of weapons including crossbow and kniveshttps://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-15685303/Schoolboy-white-supremacist-16-sentenced-sharing-terror-material-amassing-arsenal-weapons-including-crossbow-knives.html
I'll never have sex I'll never get a good job
>>220288116no mate. he's a bloke, we've been over this. do try to keep up x
shaking at all this transphobia
>>220288118that were rubbish
>>220287901how has no one ever bothered to find the ads
>>220288124Is he alright?
yeah can see from the thumbnail i don't want to be clicking that
omg im going to have nightmares now
>>220288124don't click this one, it isn't nicethe poster is clearly a deeply unsettled individual
>>220288133i shagged an african lass last night. wasnt even that good.
>>220288124Cars are nightmares. Was reminded last night of that woman in america who burned alive in her car when some football player or whatever crashed into her
>>220288124Gross!
>>220287866fucking hell
>>220288127The horror...
>>220288014Because he's not really crazy. If he were, then he would have blurted these things out long ago.
got my PC backarduous task of reinstalling everything and praying nothing goes wrong ever again
Is this footy on in like 20 minutes or something or what thenGot the itvx on and signed in and it's all adverts but it says international football
the future of britain is in deano's hands
>>220288014im still curious about the accident, apparently he was having a walk in a forest and fell and lost consciousness, broke one of his little fingers and caused nerve damage and got a massive gash on the side of his face
>>220288181Yeah they hate mentioning kick off cause they want you to watch the adverts and the boring people in between
>>220288127>police found an 'arsenal' of weapons, including a crossbow and knives at his homelmao
>>220288122right. wrong hours for gaybrit again. I'll try back later
>>220288156Was she thicc or skinny
>>220288179you LOVE this image
give it to the black guy he'll score
>>220288179did u lose ur saved memes folder
might pop to sainburys and get meself something nicechoccy cake or somethinghad a stressful few months x
britain in bloom.
In Lidl, anyone want owt?
dude we heckin give 4-year-olds AKs with dum dum rounds
>>220288216Jokes on them I've got it muted, but when it's kick off I'll put it on the projector and pour an ice cold fosters like I'm at the pub like a proper lad
Test Cricket.
We'll live and die in these towns.
bit of ball kicking going on soon, eh?
>>220288254300 biscoff eggs please mate, that should get me through the weekendx
Ian wrights come as the black where's wally
>>220288179CIA has all your data now
>>220288220Imagine that, keeping knives in the home.
>>220288254no cadbury's. forren muck now and they're trying to pretend it's still british.
>>220288127>>220288127>bullied autist finds extremist discord server that tries to groom him into mass murdermad how many cases there are of this
>>220288288made-up + unfunny story
>>220288254i want pink twink hole thanks
calling a (1) crossbow and some knives an arsenal is a bit dramatic though don't u think
>>220288288Scroom
>>220288232BIG HOOP but tight waist. it was the stereotype of what a fit african looks like. the arse had some 50 cal recoil to be fair, but it was no different than shagging any other bird with a nice arse.
>>220288295nothing ever happens yeah maybe it seems that way because you never leave your mums spare room
>>220288282Just think, we could've had Eni Aluko on analysis tonight but she couldn't help herself. Nice to know that massive chip on her shoulder has really fucked things up for her.
>>220288271try to leave the place better than you entered it
sir carl jung
suffering from stuttering again this time it's only in games looks like I'm fucking cursed whatever I touch is bound to stutter sooner or later
one of my patients today was a 40 year old ladautistic as shit he wasreminded me of mebloody annoying he wasdid all the things that i would do in his shoesprick
>>220288288they had some arnotts caramel tim tams in tooi've tried the original flavour and they weren't very nice. penguins mog them
I was the best Beatle
>>220288336what do you do mate
>>220288254Get the skinny salt and vinegar chip sticks please
off down the nigger shop
early morning incelwalk on the cards
>>220288288shouldn't it be Mrs Negro
footy futa fifa
Stalinists, do we need ‘em?
>>220288348just things like talk a bit too much or just stand there when they're using non-verbal language to indicate its time for me to leave/the conversation is finished x
>>220288342Imagine if sir macca or ringo was in /brit/ laughing at your jokes and you never knew. Mad world innit
arsed it all up should've paid attention in school and done STEM instead of choosing some random useless bullshit
Hahaha it's Timothy
what are some natural appetite suppressants
>>220288386eating food reduces your appetite
>>220288386coffee, hatred of your fat body
>>220288318What is her problem anyway?
>>220288403coffee?
>>220288386are cigs natural?
>>220288413yes
the two dead beatles died before i was born
>>220288384Think oxford bender wore that tooGrok pull up the old oxford bender picture where he's dressed as a dalmatian or cow or something
>>220288386Water
on yhe gay porn
I'm so hungry I could eat a Biscoff horse
>>220288386ozempic
Broke a cig the other night when I was pissed up. It was poking out the packet and I closed it and snapped the cig. They're nearly a quid each now these cigs. I'll try to stick it back together with rizlas I suppose
Anglo-Saxons be like >Oi bruv oil hov the roight to replace yow haha yow lorst Then>On me mum I will gert barck orn them parkistarnis for the groomin gengs
>>220288481did you forget to change your vpn or something
might become a paperback writer
Right is it kick off time yet or what? Let's have some goals
>>220288386poo
>>220288470time to switch to pipe tobacco
Feel like fucking shit
What football match is on tonight? I thought the Premier League was back this weekend?
>>220288494Anglo-Saxon discovers the UK is not entirely Anglo-Saxon Anglo-Saxon will next discover why he is hated internationally
>>220288507rorkeXposed
>tortilla>cheese>jalapenos>pepperoni>in the microwave until the cheese melts then rolled up into a tubewho needs to order pizza when you can have a Darren's Delight (that's what i call it) (my name's darren)
>>220288496goal number one: gain a cluegoal number two: grow upgoal number three: stop watching wogball it ruins your central nervous system
>>220288507oi don't doxx me wanker
>>220288507Definitely posts here
>>220288528oh pack it in you little larping gaylord
boner of a lonely fart
darrens delight for dindins;)
Premier League weekends just feel comfier, don't they bros?
>>220288527England v Uruguay
>>220288538Haha you're alright
>>220288507get him into a nazi communist discord at once
Miss are Bozza
Asked a girl out at work>Do you want to go out for a drink?>No, I have a boyfriend>So, no?>Uhh yes.Essentially like that
I have nothing interesting to postI'm a tedious boring wanker
>>220288556this is a championship thread
>>220288535Hi Darren
movin back into me flat tomorrowonly took me near 5 bloody monthskafkimess it was
>>220288556yeah more people inside watching the game so great time to go for a walk
>>220288556>Premier LeagueFuck off plastic
Can't bring myself to care about random friendlies, would rather watch relegation shitters play each other on a Friday evening
>>220288571you've been done
>>220288571bit of a blunder on your parttime to hand in your notice
>>220288574ktim but they can't stop me from posting inane shite
Haha they all started singing this national anthem and it's complete gibberish. What are foreigners like with their mad languages and that
It's funny how I recognise all the local characters and weirdos I regularly see on the high street, yet I doubt they recognise me
asked a girl out>?>N>?>N:(
>>220288550>Oi bruv you dornt warnt everywurn in youa arear to be engurlish youa larpa
>>220288582Hiya
>>220288571Why would you say "so, no?" after she already said "no"?
>>220288481>>220288615literally no idea what accent this is suppose to be mimicking
>>220288596Na she was 17 I assumed that she couldn't have a serious relationship
might go to bed
started a fart which started the whole world cryingbut I didn't see that the fart was on me
our national anthem is so shit, wish we had one about war or something besides the fucking king
what accent are /brit/ posts in?
watching magnolia (1999) directed by Paul thomas anderson starring Tom Cruise, Phillip Seymour Hoffman, Julianne Moore, John C Reilly and William H Macy
Wait, so League One matches cross over with the international break? No wonder League One has fewer foreign players; they would all be off playing for their national teams instead of their domestic teams
>>220288645careful lad
>>220288619She didn't she said she had a boyfriend not that she didn't want a drink.
partick thistle losing good stuff
THE MAN HAS KICKED THE BALL
THE KINGWHAT WHAT WHATTHE KING WHAT WHAT WHAT THE KING WALLAHI WURIYA WURIYA WURIYA WURIYA INSHALAHHHHHHHH
>>220288682>she didnt
>>220287974>>220288054*schizophrenic. Dont know why people on the internet started treating them as the same thing schizoid is another disorder and it doesnt involve psychosis.
>>220288681She was still in uni you sick FUCK
>>220288681Lmao. It isn't illegal that all which matters. But I'm only 20.
>>220288672You should have changed it to Rule Britannia a century ago
might do something, might not
>>220288675I've never seen it. Lmk
Sir safe
>>22028867410% welsh, 10% scottish, 40% northern (various) 40% southern (various)
>GOD SAVE OUR GRACIOUS KING omg is ts fr >LONG LIVE OUR NOBLE KINGbro they deadass >GOD SAVE THE KINGLMAOOOO YO WTF 3 TIMES NIGGA DEMENTIA ASS ANTHEM LMAOOOOOOO
>>220288727navy is in shambles people would just use it to make fun of us now
>>220288736delete this
>>220288714I know but still no doesn't always mean no.
He’s the president in residentHe’s kind of in chargeHe’s got the whole world saying“That’s my Bush!”Life is hard, that’s the price of fameWhen you’re President, everyone knows your name(Hey, what’s happ’nin’?)It’s my Bush!I can’t believe he’s actually in the White HouseThat’s our man!That’s my Bush!
>>22028868199% sure if dropped into the role of this fella, I'd be able to shag the one complaining within 3 days.
watched a bit of the king's coronation and he felt out of place, everyone didas if the ceremony was made for a totally different order of people
Come on lads 10 nil
>>220288750>she said no>no she didnt>here's where she said no>i knowspastic
>>220288674don't know, but i always assume there are more posters from the midlands and north. i don't really imagine people from the south, even less places like bristol and cornwall, posting on here
the stuttering seems to be gone after rebooting the laptop
>>220288777Bros never pulled
FOOTBALL IS ONFOOTBALL IS ON FOOT TO BALL FOOT TO BALL FOOT TO BALL WE BALLWE BALLIN NIGGA
>>220288750in your case you should always take it as a no
>>220288787t. man telling us a story of how he got rejectedlol
tiger woods has died in a car crash in Florida what the fuck
>>220288780London Out with their 20+ friends to a nightclub every nightCornwall Nobody lives there Northumberland, Cumbria and Yorkshire Only people to stupid or incellic left and as a result out at a local pub or stuck in his bedroom
hi everybady
>>220288785post a photo proving you're in russia
>>220288812>Donald Trump says Tiger Woods will NOT be playing at The Masters in bombshell claim about golf legendDamn did he know
>>220288812he's back on the pills isn't it
>>220288809I've been rejected by over 100 women realistically But I've been accepted by 5That's all that matters.
>>220288812Poor guy, just a few days ago he played a golf tournament and found out he's totally washed now, I can't blame him for going out like this RIP KING
>>220288366meant more like your job, you spacker...
>>220288812another one?
>>220288845kek you must be short
>>220288823>Only people to stupid or incellic left and as a result out at a local pub or stuck in his bedroomunintelligible sentence
>>220288845you've fucked 5 women? don't believe you
booed out my barse
>>220288812he's fine you dumpass
fucked 5 women myself but i hated them all and just wanted to shag them
wtf i thought i look british
@grok pull up the last time OP was a faggot
last time i asked a girl out was my mate from college to watch the dark knight (dates it)and she said no and hugged mehaven't tried that since
you're all virgins until proven otherwise
>tiger woods in car crashgood, i hope that lascivious, jew-promoted wog dies
princess diana has died in a car crash in Paris what the fuck
bumhole arse
>>220288892not with that curly brown hair brown eyes and olive skin you didn't paulo
i have died in a sugar crash after drinking 2x energy drinks
lauren alexis has just been exploded by a drone what the fuck
sorry guys I did troll you there I got you good tee hee
don't know my simpcity account infoneed to see my big boobed camwhores
nicklaus chads stay winning
>>220288904alri internet explorerlad
>>220288904Charles doing a huge *sigh* of relief after that one. Bethy weren't happy with him marrying a tart.
>>220288953owling
>>220288940do you want me to look them up and send some in here for you
wish it was socially acceptable for adults to playnever grew out of wanting to run about a play area or go to the park
>>220288898Was going to ask the toilfu if she wanted to go watch Scream 7 on Sunday but now I've decided against it because of this post.
yeah well that's me but I don't care so
horseborg
>>220288977'
>>220288892how do you upload your photos to sites like these without worrying what theyre going to do with em. not safe.
mad how we shrink as we age 60 year olds have lost an inch and three inches by 80s
Being womfy takes commitment Commitment to stop toiling over everything
>>220288977play with your kids
>>220288991
just found out that chinese people speak in parables and riddles. imagine asking chang if he wants owt from the offy and he says >I am gripped in indecision, like the Emperor Chongqi in the War of the Seven Heavenly Kingdoms, yet my heart remains unmoving like the rocks against the south china sea in a storm
>>220289009At least one person in here only has 3 inches so that's probably alarming for them
>>220288675awful film
>>220289013doubt ill be reproducing
The Jews just took over the entire world outside of Iran what the fuck
jesus fuck i'm on a japanese website how the fuck are they still living like this
>>220289020yeah i bet they don't actually speak like that
>>220289020this is how people wrote before you had to cater to the new demographic of 75iq mongoloids that can only technically readthey assumed you were worldly enough to understand
organising the /brit/ meetup in the 'cord so rorke doesnt see it
>>220289021hopefully it's like an integer underflow situation and I'll have an infinite cock at 80
watching the football and just seen a lad who looks like the zesty foden meme?
>>220288980hmm maybe you escape incelity, however, i'm trapped in its gripi can't advise how to do it well, the circumstances that would give you success, i'm merely here to recount my experiences of being a sensitive young man
>>220289063they are so behind it is quite charmingold web design is so nice
wahey
Sad news lads. Richard 'Tiger' Woods has unfrotunately died in a car crash
nigga name dick woodsdouble willy gay boy
>>220288980if it makes you feel better, i asked a mate from uni and she said yes and fell in love with me.
>>220288904Always thought she was mannish looking
just found out that james woods died rip 2 a real nigga
>>220289064they literally dohttps://www.youtube.com/shorts/Mpkdz6Zr9oc
Tiger WOODS Golf clubs are called irons and WOODSnominal predetermination innit
certified viking rapebaby
Hearing reports of Tiger Woods winning the euromillions rollover?
new collier dropped
>>220289063pure sovl
>>220287746nice one
>>220289135just not gonna let my face be banked on some server having it be raped by millions of ai “agents”
Sir Tiger Woods
>>220289131Nominative determinism I mean Getting my words wrong because England won't score any fackin GOALS
king charles has entered a "new regime of malquiescence"
Might purchase a nice wool peacoat
>>220289148Love cheeky Craig Charles. Love his cheeky scouse ways and his cheeky laugh. Top lad
>>220289164better never show your face in public ever again then
>>220289190Sir Clue Gainer
>>220289198remember him in robot wars? class that
>>220289190grow up
>>220289140don't watch anything narrated by a woman - only skip or ignore, you just know it's going to be some vapid low IQ pop-culturalisation of any given topic
>>220289217>>220289217>>220289217
>>220289199wear a scream mask everywhere i go me
might procure a pair of penny loafers
might purchase a nice wool coat to piss in and put it on vinted as a pee coat lol or something
>>220289218I havent even heard a woman speak out loud for 3 weeks now
>>220289218incelious but true
>>220289131
>>220289214He did a thing called Craig Charles's funky bunkerLook it up it's a right laugh. You can't find most episodes now I think it's maybe list media but what there is is serious 90s lad telly
