adele dazeem edish
I'm a yank
>>220552214The solution to that is just to masturbate.
Red flags for women:TattoosPiercings other than ear lobeDyed hairOverweight / UnderweightHas male "friends"Bad relationship with parents ESPECIALLY DadLikes "travelling"Overly politicalHas social mediaStuck on her phoneGoes clubbingNo hobbiesDoesn't make you things when in a relationship
Who would win a medieval knight or a samurai?
>>220552292knight due to armour
>>220552267Adding some more>obsessed with dogs>likes "true crime">thinks "wine" or "coffee" counts as an interest
>>220552292knight would fuck up the samurai
>>220552292Medieval knights had superior swords
>>220552267More women should be like Hellen Keller in my fair opinion, deaf and blind.
had a dream that i was a woman and i got pregnant and it felt good :/
slept like shittt
>>220552264you’re a virgin right?
The Elephant Man is my favourite film
david bowielove him
>>220552331NoThere's no real difference between masturbating and sex for an orgasm
>>220552348nah lad you’re definitely a virgin
david poowie
No way emmayank has a job
>>220552346Why is Trent Reznor looking at his arse?
enrolled at the school of hard cocks
>>220552385You're first assignment is due..*unzips*
Is it confirmed irish came from the ibernian peninsula or just theory
>>220552412just a theorydon't think they did myself
>>220552292>>220552298 >>220552301 >>220552302samurai were around long enough that the later ones had guns
When real gays hit on me in person i cringe and try to get rid of them. Why I'm like that baka
feeling sleepy
>>220552515I'm not gay but my mate is. I'll jerk him off or suck him off a couple times a week.I don't get anything out of it but he has a hell of a time.
i'm an internyou're wikileaks
you're an interni'm bill clinton
i'm a friend of dorothyi'm in the navy navyi'm how you say...a quare
>>220548485>There are no atheists on top of rocketsDiscrimination from the bastards at NASA, refusing to hire atheist astronauts
spring has sprung and so have I
Toil bros...?
>>220552605it has loomed
wish it was winter again
A Holocaust survivor dies and goes to heaven. When he gets there, he tells God a Holocaust joke. God, offended, tells him, "That's not funny." The Holocaust survivor replies, "Oh well, you had to be there."
>>220552605had toil yesterdayyou have too many bank holidays
>>220552651You're right. Hope we get less next year!
>>220552637don't get it :/
>>220552664Praise be to Allah.
Quite literally wishing all of you a wonderful neoliberal morning x
rorke eating breakfast
>>220552680
that francis train guy should be vaporised
Hegseth fart in 4k
grendel tower, whatever happened there
>>220552707hologram
>>220552530Oh that's different
Why does every single youtuber wear a bowtie and have those shelves behind them? Have some originality ffs.
Do the yanks that post here also post in /cum/?
>Sir Keir Starmer says it is "deeply concerning" the rapper is set to headline a festival after recent antisemitic comments.
have done nothing for the past two hours except refresh the same few pages over and over againi have become an automaton
>>220552718I hate how loads of them have tiny handheld microphones now
>>220552720i only post in /brit/. used to post in /luso/ but it died
>>220552720I have probably made a single digit number of posts in /cum/ in the last decade.
i was born in 1900 i'm 126 years old not even joking x
easy 8k this morning - 5:44/km at 147bpmlavely stuff
>>220552755Enjoy your broken knees
>>220552740>>220552741I think it’s cute you post here instead :P
esl niggas be like>i think he is very egoistic
>>220552760alri fat cunt
Yay
Me granddad died in Auschwitz. Fell out of the guard tower while on patrol and broke his neck.
>>220552733>>220552718rorke's been REAL quiet since this one dropped
>>220552718Because you watch nerds? I watch Vice Grip Garage and Beard Meats Food.
>>220552720Never. It's so boring.
>>220552728He shouldn't be performing to be honest, it's a cynical cash grab by corporate cunts who don't give a shit if ethnic hatred is inflamed
you ever meet a girl who eats sardines
>>220552783i recently watched a 45 minute video about curl https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/CURL
it's here
>>220552796Based FOSS enthusiast
>>220552791Literally the greatest artist of the 21st century but ok
I saw 6 men kicking and punching the mother in law. My neighbour said 'aren't you going to help?' I said 'no, 6 should be enough'
>>220552796So buy a bow tie and a straw hat. Those types love dressing like it's the 1800s
might go to wyoming
>>220552817harharharhar
>>220552819I've been to Yellowstone, it's not actually yellow
>>220552818I dress and look like this>>220552808I am a FLOSS enjoyer
rorkinholeftypāo
>>220552772BASED MeloniRightoid moment
>>220552720Primarily yes, but I come here too
>>220552838That works too. I wish I was good at math like my old man is but I was the athlete in the family and dum dums
i miss those fat nerds you used to see on the internetthe real neckbeard typesthey were good
All my niggas nazis niggaNigga Heil Hitler
we love claude at /brit/ dont we folx
>>220552854mad that this is a real song by one of the most famous artists in the world
>>220552854get him booked at the festivals
the devil my opp
I can’t wear trainers anymore. I just can’t. They look so juvenile. Made of plastic. In third world sweatshops. I need to invest in some proper footwear. Made in England. Of high quality materials. Time to get a move on. Time to put some effort in.
nearly pancake day
>>220552852They're mostly she/her now like Employed Woman
Thank God it’s a bank holiday today
>>220552877Fodie's of London
what would you do if you were on a pirate ship and another pirate ship appeared on the horizon but it was green and translucent and there was a skeleton captain at the helm
>>220552896sick tat brah
>>220552896mad how some people just look like runts no matter what they do
*scurries back to my runt hole*
>>220552896Fix hairGet contactsLose weightShave those pubes off your face Bosh
>>220552919he cute
>>220552854They wanna be just like us and all they bitches can tell, niggerNigger, niggerI'm callin' my opps niggerThey better not play with me, niggerI sleep with the K with me, niggerSome bad shit lay with me, niggerMy kids, they straight, you niggerI'm not fake, you niggerBlack diamonds today, I'm a niggerNigger, niggerI'm callin' my opps niggerNigger, niggerI'm callin' my opps nigger
having my hourly vegemite sandwich
you know dr frankenstein was getting freaky with tha monster
>>220552919My advice is 18 year old girls want to fuck hot dads. You're all set.
>>220552934frankenstein was the monster
he was gay, quasimodo?
>>220552867he's being ironic tbf
>>220552959Nostradomus the hunchbank of notradame!!
they're going to reveal a new country tomorrow
>>220552972The United Kingdom of England and Wales
what did Kanye west even say I know it wasn’t antisemtic but idk what. Was it another Wiley situation ?
>>220552972Who's they
do you ever have a moment where you realise that you're a real person and not just a disembodied brain
5 multivitamins down the gulletim gonna be like fuckign IRON MAN
>>220552985https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sITIu08Zz64
>>220552978Kill yourself
>>220552995all the big ones
>>220552985he said 'all my niggers nazis nigga heil hitler' which some people took the wrong way
>>220552985nigga it was definitionally the most anti semitic shit possible
has a girl ever told you what animal you look like
>>220553001That's a dude with the leg tattoo isn't it? Need you out of business.
>>220553013the Democratic People's Republic of England
>>220553020gasp! that nigger is a white supremacist!
>>220553035my ex said i was a boar
>>220553022it was all sign and no signifieri can scream n at the top of my lungs but unless it's aimed at a blakc person then definitionally it's the same as screaming shit piss cunt fag fuck
>>220553035yeah a squid :/
>>220553022Meant to type was not wasnt
>>220552985>I know it wasn’t antisemticHe released a song named "Heil Hitler", which most people would see as antisemitic, given that Hitler was famously antisemitic
>>220553047ha
>>220553055shouldve gone to specsavers x
>>220553038don't bother me shart. back to your pinata and your cheeseburger
>>220552972I know
how to train your nigger
>>220553064>cumrag
>>220553064why's your passport got a little knob on it lol
>>220553061trying to throw your fellow countryman under the bus in an attempt to endear yourself to foreigners online isnt going to work lad, quite the opposite in fact
>>220553064
can't think properly due to sleep deprivation
Gwenog Jones (b. 1968)[1] was a Welsh witch who attended Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. When Gwenog graduated from Hogwarts, she became a professional Quidditch player and later achieved fame as the captain and Beater of the Welsh all-female Quidditch team, the Holyhead Harpies.
how to train your penischapter 1 jelqing
there's so many beautiful women on the internet but not in real life
>>220553035I look like a toad
>pasbort
>PASBORT
>>220553064>welsh niggas pretending they're a real country>>220553084I very much appreciate yanks who are able to criticise the worst aspects of Am*rica
>>220553096brits really be having magic and still be like 'toil on the morrow'
>>220553104sc
>>220553084I'm not endearing myself to anyone, I hate most Americans and I come here to avoid them. Americans are retarded.
>>220553095ktim
>>220553112"shart cheeseburger pinata" isn't criticism he's just being a suckup
>>220553099they take the real life ones and put them in the internet
>>220553131you're delusional
almost thatcher day
sometimes the penis goes in the poo
okay thats me then being me then okay
there are 100 beautiful women on the internet4 billion women in the worldyou see maybe 5000 women in your lifeso the average person will see 0.000125 beautiful women
>>220553153steamingtoil
>>220553153mad ladi still don't know who this is or why he films himself looking sad
>>220553064my son is also named pasbort
whats the british equivalent of shart cheeseburger pinatapoo sarnie facepainting?
dude cody i wish i was frickin briddish so bad man FUCK (collapses an entire wall of my paper mache house with a single punch)
>>220553157you know who the most beautiful woman in the world is? the one reading this.
wonder why they used that picture
>>220553167lol
>>220553171
>>220553171do you ever get bored of the rorkebait
right them, time for toil
>>220553153>sits in his room all day watching tv>getting fatter by the day>now on the booze every dayThis man's going to be dead in a matter of months.
>>220553171m night shyamalan
>>220553140you're no different from a mexican white supremacist or a wiggerbe who you are yankboy
>>220553123Criminally based>>220553131It's possible to dislike your own country (or aspects of it) without that meaning that you're trying to suck up to foreigners
>>220553168you're the only one who thinks about sucking up to Brits. I go on tangents here against the British government and wokism often and get hated for it. Idc who likes me, i can't be filtered lol
New Zealanders be like "Bick in the 80s I saw an Izzy Isbourne cincert at the arena in Ickland."
yeahurr
you just KNOw this 4 day week will be the longest week EVER
cheeky day off toil, bank holiday Tuesday I call itx
are guy
rorke's da stepping off the train and just standing there
>>220553192Kangaroo American don't bother me. You're the same poo that other guy was with a different accent
>>220553207is that tom scott?
I'm in need of an Emma Watson facesitting session complete with pungent farts.
>>220553160His name is Tim and apparently he has mental health problems (some have said schizophrenia). He used to post slightly eccentric videos on YouTube. Here is his Twitter account:https://nitter.poast.org/timmyuk
>>220553188WE AREWE AREWALMART
>>220553171>warmest weather of the year>24C>>>>warmest weather>>>>>>24C
>>220553207mental how many neeks here will tall you she isn't fit
leftypol eating a kiwi or some other such gay fruitperhaps a canteloupethe queer
>>220553201super
actually it doesnt translate literally . you need to come up with the the most embarrassing thing about britain a crappy meme food and a weird thing about foreigners so the translation could be balcony pasty gurkas
>>220553254screaming
>>220553239yeah but she isn't
>>220553171They probably used that pic because it shows people enjoying warm weather. But of course Rorke is fixated on the fact that the guy is brown while the woman is white. Rorke never leaves his smelly bedroom so he hasn't seen that interracial friendships and relationships are pretty common in the UK these days.
i live to toil
typed something vulgar and decided it wasn't worth sharing with the class
pooing out a slimy nigger
>>220553243proper bender
>>220553289scream
>>220553270she is though
teleporting into skyrim so i can marry serana
>>220553308just not my cup of tea lad. you can have her.
ok bye bye
>>220553235>slightly eccentriche would film and upload the same video with minor alterations ever single day, often multiple times a day, from about 2014 to the early 2020sthe video was>tim introduces himself, states his name and address, as if he's making a video audition>either sings to a backing track or "plays" various musical instruments. his singing and playing is absolutely awful and tuneless>begins hurriedly rambling about various events in his life while carrying the camera around his flat and into the street, repeating himself and stumbling over wordshe was a diagnosed schizophrenic and likely had OCD compelling him to ritually film and upload vidoes, which he now substitutes for tweets after he got sectioned and banned from uploadinghe had tens of thousands of videos on his channel before they got wiped
>>220553314thx x
>>220553311she had such a peng voice
>>220553320dont forget the willy pics
an image of tim's cummy nob is forever etched on my memory
you're from the sainsburys
anyone ever had a viral tweet
>>220553344sometimes it flashes in my mind for a split second when i cum idk how to stop it
>>220553207He's looking more and more like Freaky Fred
>>220553353I don't even know how to use twitter, how to make it so you see the good posts. I made a burner and it was all just Tesla / SpaceX / indian posts.
>>220553320>banned from uploadingCan a person be banned from uploading YouTube videos because of menthol elf reasons? We truly do live in a tyrannical country
going to go to sleep and see if it resets my brain
get yeh fooking cock out timmee
Account based in: High Wycombe
>>220553235>>220553320Ty both I'm doing the deep dive now
>>220553348duke's place in marlowduke's place in marlowcoming round the corner
Thoughts on Reddit?
The Quiet Sadness of Super Mario Sunshine: A Video Essay (Part 1)
off to chess club soon at the local library
>>220553421something to do innit
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Q8HKnLlKMZchttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aXmIZrnP7W0https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nj151i01joono more timkino evermakes me a bit sad
>>220553423runtime: 3 hours 40 minutes
can a fat balding 29 year old australian man be moe
Where’s mousey?? :/
>>220553469...yh
>>220553495:3c
>>220553485ktim
Realistically, how much izzat did he lose when it was found out that he lied for years about being an engineer?
if they made the my little pony horses real i'd have my own wikipedia page within a week
so turns out it was them all along, sorry for not believing you
>>220553440what the fuck is he doing here1.7k view video btw
>>220553541>he doesn't know
>>220553572i don't know!
>>220553555it's like the back just carries on directly to the thighs
>>220553541reviewbrah was a big tim fan back in the day
>>220553555She is fit as fuck
>>220553555leftypol's bird
>>220553485average noncetendo fan
can you lot watch all 3 videos i posted so i can stop replying to myself
>>220553555That's so hot
>>220553609nox
what do we reckon for the ol power plants then?
I wonder what mousenonce does during these periods when he’s not posting here
>>220553635extracts copper from sim cards, reads florida law, researches FOREX, plays his horse game
>>220553635Prior to his sectioning it was mainly reading wikipedia articles and boiling his own piss. For food he would often eat plain boiled pasta, washed down with an energy drink. Nowadays he plays his horse game.
>>220553555Berry
got arthur eye tits or something, joints are always cracking
good morning
>>220553694alri
>>220553621thank god nick clegg poo-pooed the idea of building new nuclear plants in 2010 because they wouldn't be online until at least 2021
i'll kill you all
>>220553621sell the spent fuel to our middle eastern allies, close them down, and buy all the electricity from France
>>220553704HowI'm too far away
fuck abjadsfuck logographs
>>220553711plane
>>220553694
Today's opportunities are like a fresh pieces of fruit on the branch. All it takes is for you to reach out and grab it
we are anonymousewe are leion
toilberg: you in tomorrow?me: yeahthen walking away I realised I'm not in tomorrow
Support the British economy by purchasing Warhammer!We all love Warhammer, don’t we folks?
>>220553747
How do you pronounce "posthumously"?
>>220553769posstchumussly
>>220553769As written but I can understand that people might pronounce it "post-yoomously"
should i ask my gay coworker if he got his bumhole stretched over easter?
>>220553768little chiwawa
>>220553769pohst-u-mast-ley
asian women
just blacked rorkes nan
>>220553813Lovely fannies
need to get on it (the tea) but cba
Ate a Pot Noodle last night right before bed in a lapse of judgement and got woken up by horrible heartburn at 6 am. Took two Gaviscons and have to stay upright so got out of bed.
farting blood down the stairs
Goodnight, Anglo kings.
>>220553859goodnight rest well brother
>>220553859goodnight brother. We have the watch now
>>220553859*nods respectfully in your direction*
>>220553769pəwstjʉməslij
there’s a shipwreck off the coast of Colombia with $17 billion dollars worth of gold still in it
managerstein still off work so this is basically another day off
today, i am homosexual
>>220553911You ever play those Uncharted video games? If you like stories like that you'd like those games, on a wild adventure hunting for lost treasures and civilisations etc. Fun stuff.
>>220553859HH brotherSee you in Valhalla
Are you this funny in real life?
>>220553927are you cute?
>>220553915never understood people who say this but admittedly only because I've only ever worked jobs where the work I am responsible for always exists independently of my mangers. It still needs done whether they're there or not and if I didn't do it then it would most definitely be noticed upon the managers' return