Cooked some beef rice that went out last august for lunch team
>>220608732>>220608732>>220608732Thoughts?
>>220608729where do women meet blokes then? i wanna be one of the blokes they meet
hopefully this iran shite will be wrapped up sick to death of every single podcast i’m listening to chattering about it
>>220608743waterstones
Speaking of PI's I recall once watching a tv show about benefits frauds being caught out, they got this one woman who was living with a """friend""" and after sneakily looking into her home confirmed she was a lezzerWhatever bennies she was on required her to be single (I'm guessing single mother with kids type deal) so they cut her off
>>220608743Mutual friends and shit like that. Social proofing is important for women, they need a guy that all their friends approve of
>>220608743normal people go to social events matepubs, concerts, parties, get togethers with friends
might track down my old gf from high school (who is now married) and see if i can start an affair with her
creating 100s of big dick rape golems and releasing them upon the general populace
>>220608752didnt think they'd talk about that on the weekly gay podcast for swedish benders
>>220608781kek owned that hybrid of turnip and cabbage
>>220608742what does deep voiced the place out mean?
>>220608779nigga on the left looks like he's finna bowl a strike
Fucking tired team been tidying up it's graft
>>220608757>they got this one woman who was living with a """friend""" and after sneakily looking into her home confirmed she was a lezzerHow exactly did they confirm they were in a committed relationship and not just girls who occasionally sucked pussy?
>>220608741Yanks probably think this is hilarious not realising that millions of irish and their descendants live here
>>220608178I think we have some stupid system where all electricity has to be sold at the price of the most expensive source (which is currently gas). I think this deal was offered to energy companies to incentivise them to build renewable energy or something like that. So without this stupid profiteering, our energy bills could be much lower, thanks to renewables.
>>220608778I have to contact my linkedin crush who was in my structural design and drawing remedial class in may 2016She's in new york now as per my last stalking. But she's syrian christian so her father might honor kill me to save his caste's izzat
>>220608743Steam fairs
>>220608802Talking loudly in a deep voice which intimidates some people
got your summer wardrobes sorted /brit/fa/?
>>220608833american supermarket fit
nice lavender shirt mate
>>220608833i only ever wear plain black t-shirts and grey, green, or brown trousers
>>220608830Melter behaviour
>>220608833Not even a luxury brand polo. Not committing to your look
>>220608781it’s gone woke these last years sadly
>>220608833
aussies and yanks are the backbone of brit
>>220608827like a woman's arse in jeans me
kittenberg planning my downfall
a woman posted her face on the autism subreddit and someone is simping out over it oh my dayssssss
>>220608861Never worn jorts in my life. Cant see why a man would ever wear them
>>220608859the barbour is back in the wardrobe
>>220608778wtf are you me?I keep harassing her and she keeps blocking mecucking her husband is the only reason I live
these tapentadols are weirdly strong, thought they might have accidentally sent me the 200mg ones but no it's just the regular 100mg ones i usually get, didn't think my tolerance would reset this quickly
>>220608890blud chose the ugliest barbour
grimmest moment of my life was hooking up with a fat single mum on plenty of fish and her kid walking in on her sucking my knob
the watchhttps://youtu.be/H1Fwi_HSwpM
>>220608833This weighs a couple kilos
>>220608883*yawns in your face so forcefully that a tonsil stone dislodges and flies right up your nostril*
>>220608890Peng boots
>>220608893>I keep harassing her and she keeps blocking meThe indian dating experience
just got roared at by an australian and pelted with a tonsil stone
>>220608890wonder if anyone's ever tried sticking their cock in that hole
so yummy
>>220608810They lived together and the investigators had CCTV cameras pointing towards the living room so they could determine itAlso found out that it was legal to have public cctv looking into your home for X minutes a day (might be 5 or whatever) which was rather grim
I stalked my gf for about 3 years and actually even to this day I check her social media every so often might kill myself when she gets another man
>>220608941Heron food ahh goy slop
>>220608893marriage is a holy sacrament before God. please do not be responsible for its destruction
>>220608944i do this but i've never had a gf and its girls who served me at a checkout aha
>>220608944Mine got pregnant and married and it took the wind out my sails desu
>>220608943>Also found out that it was legal to have public cctv looking into your home for X minutes a day (might be 5 or whatever) which was rather grimand people say I'm anti-social for having the curtains and blinds drawn all day
>>220608949but it's my holy duty to save her from the troubled marriage she was forced into anon
i mean haven’t we all shagged a married woman before?
>>220608974>shaggedUh... no
>>220608949i went to their wedding, it was one of those atheist weddings where they didn't mention god at all and there wasn't a church within a 10 mile radius, so in my mind adultery is a drop in the bucket
>>220608982mummikins has been there. jealous
>>220608974Yeah but it was my wife so it doesn't count
every man should shag a married woman and a tranny at least once
>>220608974I had sex with a woman who was going through a divorcenot sure if that counts as married as I'm not really sure how divorces work
>>220608974yes I have, she was a commoner and it was quite grim at her house
might go to an asian massage parlour
>>220608944so did you start stalking her before she was your gf or after?
>>220608957>>220608965lethal doses of ktimming here lads
>>220609000Wish i was mental and had no shame. Sadly im mental and have lots of shame
might go to the asian wank parlour for a massage
>>220608974yeah i have sex all the time hahaha proper sex-haver i am haha
>>220609000tims american cousin
>>220608974shagged a prossie about a month ago who casually mentioned that she was married, was tempted to ask if her husband knew she was a prossie and if he was okay with it but i figured that would be rather tactless
anyone else got any shameful childhood secrets they'd never be able to admit to anyone?
>>220609065used to shit myself all the time lol
>>220609065was pretty mean to animals as a kid, grew out of it though
made the mistake of reading the comments on those tiktoks of the cunt with the jbl speaker in japan. "he's just trying to bring some happiness to the world"
>>220609065I was brutally raped as a child
>>220609075king
>>220609065pissed in a jam jar and left it behind my cupboard for a year for no reason when i was 7ish
>>220609065Literally shat myself during a fight, will take that secret to the grave (anonymous posts don't count)
>>220609075can't decide who's been done in this exchange
>>220609065Had Indian food onceshit and pissed myself at school
>>220609095I still do this
>>220609078me too because I was too scared to use the school toilet
>>220609075Done that bitch
>>220609065Yeah loads, not going to revisit that though. Have repressed them all quite nicely thank you very much.
>>220609014DuringIt's why we split up, she accused me of stalking her (I was). Her evidence stuff like how we'd always bump into eachother in public on days we weren't together, and how I knew stuff that she hadn't told me. Obviously I wasn't very good at it.
What if we lived in a world where no one gets done, hmm?
>>220609115school toilets are a nightmare, if you're doing a shit and a group of lads happen to walk in then there's a 100% chance that they're not going to let you poo in peace and are instead going to harass you and bang on the door and comment on the smell and all sorts of nasty rubbish
never found a woman interesting enough to stalk her, don't you lads get bored and go wank to some porn or something
>>220609065Used to experiment with my sister and cousin (female)I hope my sister has forgotten, but I'm certain my cousin hasn't because it's always really weird when I see her at family gatherings
>>220609142If you go in a lesson and youre gone too long everyone will know you did a poo
>>220609065used to pick shit from my arse, wait for it to liquify in my mouth and spit it out in a "pile" next to my bed, did swallow it sometimes too.Luckily when my mum found it she just thought i'd shit there once. Seems so bad I'm making it up for shock value.
Reading about that bloke stabbed to death on Primrose Hill, would be fully NOT MY PROBLEM if I saw some youths having a fight
>>220609142I was shy even weeing at school I probably only had a wee 2 or 3 times in secondary school and I had one poo that was memorable because I had the shits and shit all down my leg
>>220609142poocel
>>220609174what the fuck, why?
>>220609075
Was at my mates house when we were about 14 and he lobbed a poo out of the top window and it landed on his neighbours car
>>220609174
>>220609180i never understood this mindset ngl i even wanked in the school toilets once
>>220609125you're a bit of a freak aren't you
>>220609177What happened? Leftypol tried telling the mandem that its the billionaires and the boomers they should be angry at?
why does /brit/ get all disgusting only when I'm eating food
>>220609174heathermong: origins
Would you still love your girlfriend if you found out she had previously been blacked?
*tickle tortures rorke*
>>220609065I was absolutely busting for a piss and asked a teacher could I go to the toilet about halfway through a lesson and he said no I could wait until the end and like the little timid timmy I was I just accepted that and tried to hold it but literally couldn't and just sat and pissed myself until I could cut off the stream again. Left a wet patch on the chair and squelched off and its a miracle nobody noticed
>>220609222Yeah I'm a bit wrong in the headGetting better though so don't be mean please yeah
>>220609251Is this part of the interview?
>>220609198don't know if i'm honest, still stick my fingers up my arse frequently as well
>>220609174:) maybe keep it to yourself. Hate that i even tangentially share an online space with you
spend my days posting with genuine poo eating mongs ffs
>>220609263>squelched off
>>220609251I'd love her even more
>>220609263are you in your mid to late 30s? mental how abusive teachers were back then
>>220609230The so-called mandem were having a fight, guy and his mate may have been targetted>Finbar, who went to Acland Burghley School in Tufnell Park and studied at the London Screen Academy, followed his family into the arts, primarily producing music videos for drill rap artists under the name Sully Shot It.>‘He goes up there with his speaker, plays reggae music with his friends… and he’s dead.’Ah such is life
half of /brit/ took the blue bus to school by the looks of it
>>220609075the fact one word got that response shows that hes been done
>>220609065used to torture my mums cats and my dads dogs
>>220609251no that would be completely irreconcilable
>>220609295wonderful cultural enrichment. thanks leftypol
>>220609296walked to school, me
>>220609305this is how you know someone’s an actual irredeemable feral freak
>>220609165same, but you've got to remember that you were a literal child and it wasn't your fault
>>220609292yeah.. I was an honest kid as well so he knew I wasnt just trying to get out the lesson for a bit but just wanted to be a bully
>>220609292They're still like it now if they can get away with itteachers are pretty much all petty tyrants, pathetic sad people
>>220609325kek looking back now i regret it. idk why i did it
>>220609106>shit and pissed myself at schoolI think I had a wank in the school toilets at least once (of course I was a teenager by this point)
playing doom eternal on "hurt me plenty" difficultythe second lowest difficulty setting and yet it is quite the challenge indeed
>>220609295Dare one politician to say rap music is problematic
>>220609263ktim but i used to do it on purpose because i didn't want to call attention to myself by putting my hand up and asking to go to the toiletused to just slowly eek piss into me trousers if it wasn't nearly the end of the lesson
some of you aren't right in the head
>>220609333I feel like if you need a piss you need a piss. I would have gone. If you get in trouble its better than weeing yourself. Thats social suicide
we've got interracial law, the muslamic infidel, they're trying to get their law over our country
>>220609333Teachers always seem to be bigger cunts to kids who won't react, have a distinct memory of a primary school teacher screaming at me because I wanted a pencil sharpener before a testWas a well behaved student and that's how I get treated, bloody twat
herro I am a chinese how are roo arr
not particularly enjoying opioids anymore lads, maybe it's because i've been combining them with benzos so the make me feel overly drowsy
>>220609401First you have to try the war hero who killed the muslims. Cant have that celebrated. Victoria cross is very colonial too bit problematic
>>220609325>>220609385my dad's dogs were pitbulls so i don't feel too bad about it
>>220609331Yeah logically I know that but it doesn't stop the shame and guilt
>>220609414See >>220609031
>>220609419Howrring
>>220609423you've charmed me you honey-tongued devil you
>>220609398These days I would probably pull my cock out and piss on his shoes, but back then I was a submissive and meek child
>>220609407its just one of those jobs that attracts despicable cunts because you get brownie points in the public eye for doing it. same with nurses, doctors, cops even. i’m a zoomer who went through school during peak woke and still had a handful of evil freak teachers who did this sort of shit
>>220609165fuck that's so hot!
>>220609428weird cunt
>>220609421Ktim, just want a nap really
>>220609331A mere 13year old child
>>220609263They all knew and they probably called you piss boy behind your back
>>220609407>Teachers always seem to be bigger cunts to kids who won't reactYeah in my school the teachers used to get bullied to the point of crying by the chavvy kids and then they'd take it out on the quiet ones who never did anything. Very pathetic desu
never been nasty to an animal but one time I knocked a birds nest out of a tree accidentally while climbing it and they all cracked :(
love eating slop and poo me. will die of a heart attack before the age of 45 and I hope you lads will come to my funeral
>>220609473i used to punch them and put them in the laundry sink and run cold water over them when it was winter. i feel bad thinking about it actually. I think i inherited some fucked up gene from my grandpa, he was a rapist unironically
>>220609515bird killer
>>220609398Ignore the first reply thats not me i wouldn't piss on anyone but hes right I was just a meek lad back then he wouldn't have tried it a couple of years later
>>220609364A true Aussie game serieshttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zZMg9ryeWOw
greggs has gone woke unfortunately
muslamic ray guns
>>220609142i reckon it's better to just sneak into the girl's bogs and do a shit in there, the foids won't harass you, though they might ask if you have a spare tampon or something
passing a log under the cubical wall when a girl asks me if I've got a spare tampon
>>220609559they call you a racist lad?
>>220609559I've been boycotting them since they sacked Employed Woman.
>>220609530But desu the teacher should have known that youre not really asking permission its simply a respect and a courtesy to ask
Collecting all my bunnies up so I can stick them in the woodchopper now Easter is finished
concerning posts all around
why were so many of you shitting and pissing yourselves in public
stretching my earlobe with an oil drum
Drinking my own piss to protest trump and capitalism
for poo the bell tolls
my uni was like 80% female so they used to just use the men's toilets if theirs were full. not the urinals though obviously
>>220609618A farewell to poo
feel like killing myself haha
used to never wear shoes and poo on the floor but thats due to my strange upbringing as a sort of feral child in a foreign country you lads have no excuse
>>220609620wouldn't stand for that me, I'd deck a woman who tried to perv on me having a wee
>>220609620i reckon women could piss in a urinal if they got really close to it, couldn't they?
>>220609620you ever run in after them and scoop the toilet water into your mouth before they had a chance to flush?
Having some strawberries and pineapple :)
going to dig a new flowerbed when i get home and i’m looking forward to it
>>220609620Rorke silent on this issue
https://vocaroo.com/1i7o0d8dPwIv
might go starbucks for a Iced Protein Matcha
>>220609644once or twice
>>220609652can tell you're over 30 unc
>>220609652dig yourself a grave
>>220609678simple things in life makes me happy
>>220609639‘ri tarzan
>>220609652nice one mate. ignore those other 2 miserable cunts
they have bladee vinyls in hmvi bought one!!
>>220609583no they made a chicken sausage roll for rasheed's lot
Gonna head up to pharmacy and grab some decongestants. Want owt?
https://youtu.be/EIuNsGUeZnwthis made me laugh a bit hope it mnakes you laugh a bit too
Friendly reminder that anime is for nonces.
hate women with small breasts me
i hear people talk about bladee but i've never heard any of his songs or even know what music he makes, just assume hes one of those mumble rappers like lil peep or w/e
>>22060972320 packs of paracetamol
>>220609730small breasts and juicy arse corr
>>220609644Kek
>>220609684aye same for most men of a certain vintage
>>220609723>pharmacyFOY
>>220609723yes one congestion please
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g1DiJEEpulEkiwi singer
>>220609730
>>220609723something to sort my arse out
>>220609727
>>220609652Tulips doing well here
when i used to get blitzed drunk and was having a shower, i would take a shit in the shower and then just stomp it down the drain. can't handle me grog innit
>>220609714I got unknown death 2002 on vinyl :)
>>220609734he's awfulgenuinely awfulhttps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vcAp4nmTZCA
can I get in shape in time for summer
>>220609760weird how you can tell this is a man
ever been to one of those places where the restroom has a toilet guy?
>>220609780cooorrrrr lush
>>220609727I'm quite enjoying berserk. after that I plan to watch cowboy bebop and maybe attack on titan
>>220609780i look like this, i'm doing 1600 calories, 3x full body and incline walking daily
you picked one of his most listenable songs
>>220609780im built like this
>>220609790yeah hate them weird cunts
>>220609792>I'm quite enjoying berserkold one or the remake?
>>220609771they only had AvP and the fool need to go back and get glue
>>220609780i literally look like this
>>220609765hate all commies except shigure
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LAWTwbZeW0U
rorke putting a bladee record on the gramophone and shaking his little ass
>>220609809the old one, haven't seen anyone say the new one is good so won't bother with it
>>220609773funny this is how exactly I thought he'd sound like, that mumbling and overexposed bass
playing Slay the Spire
>>220609807was he black perchance? every example of one i've seen in media it's always been a middle aged black man, except for the second inbetweeners movie where jay was working as a toilet guy in some nightclub in sydney
>>220609812more chance of finding other albums in small vinyl shops reallyhmv don't stock them very much
>>220609773is this a parody of soundcloud music?
>>220609790>restroomyou cannot be serious please tell me you’re just using a yankism to bait people
>>220609780so THIS is rorke
so you're all meek, plump, weak-shouldered men who used to piss and shit yourselves at school then, righto
>>220609844that's not a yankism
EsDeeKid is even worse, having a scouse chav shout to me over some awful bass
>>220609826love sunderland
umniggers twerking
>>220609843technically he came first so soundcloud rap is a parody of him
people dont listen to bladee because the music is good, they want to be part of the aesthetic and feel trendy and cool thats it
what about thaiboy digital
love to see confident people fail love seeing people try really hard and fuck everything up
>>220609858ridiculous individual
>>220609880i actually like the musicfucking runt>>220609887yh he's good to but you know...
>>220609839seen quite a few and yeah all except one (a chinese guy) were black. out of them all i only gave the chinese fella some money he should be running a chinky takeaway or something thats no job for him
>>220609887For me, it’s yung lean
is it true that black girls love bwc?
>>220609895yea you psyopped yourself into liking it even though it sounds like shit
when I was in the hospital I unknowingly went to a female toilet for several days because I was in a wheelchair and didn't look up to see the label on the door. though it was just a cubicle next to the male one in a shared room so it wasn't a big deal
I still listen to the same shit I did in schoolPierce The Veil, MY Chemical Romance, etc. >>220609895You'd be better off telling people you're in it for the aesthetic
>>220609894well i don't like to call it a toilet because a toilet is an object, not a room. i'm also not overly keen on "bathroom" because in this particular scenario there isn't a bath in the room, so restroom seems perfectly appropriate to me
>>220609909never did>>220609919yeah but i like mcr and pierce the veil too nigga my music taste develops
>>220609902No
>>220609780Vile body
>>220609880You're not being very supportive of the australian trap beats industry right now..
>>220609926see >>220609894
Any shaggers in?
>>220609948I have been known to shag at one point of my life
>>220609956That is a rough 26
>>220609948Yeah, me of your mamán
>>220609956saw this yesterday on Instagram and was going to screenshot it and post it here but I didnt
>>220609956absolutely fried her skin with tanning
>>220609956What tanning does to someone...never got it myself why look farker than you actually are and artificially age your skin?
>>220609895maybe that song wasn't the best examplepost your favourite bladee song
>>220609940sure mate
>>220609986
>>220609986Hahahaha
Why is it circumcised
>>220609620>my uni was like 80% femaleDid you shag a lot, given there were so many opportunities?
lush wilbert
>>220609956yas queen
right well thats an image of a mangled willy with a rubber band around it for some reason
right well that's a willy
tee hee im a girl
Chopped knob
>>220610038hello beauty please do the needful and post your pussy pic i love you dear
>>220610018you'd think so wouldn't you, but no i didn't shag at all
>>220610058Maybe x
>>220610038like half of us are
made a rambling post pretending to be a girl about how my bf won't go down on me because my bum stinks
>>220609956mad how women just slather toxic chemicals all over their faces
rained today did it? didn't notice
>>220610087its a secret shush x
>at job centre >work coach shouts at me>slam the door as I leave >got a new work coach who told me the other one got a different job because I scared them
won't have enough NI contributions to get a pension me. will have to kill myself by then
just seen that bloke that gets posted who's staying in a mental health ward on instagram reelshe's called tricktok88
>>220610093I also put on a little bit of cream on my face. I'm just bent like that
bought some cap guns and have been playing with them a lot, sometimes firing them in a confined space like my car and probably doing irreparable damage to my hearing
when diddy foids starting saying they were 'lain pilled' and pretending to be schizophrenicfuck womenkill them
>>220610117your horible
>>220610118they just give you pension credit instead which is basically the same thing
>>220610126ever pretended to do a suicide with one to feel what its like
>>220610117i have to pretend to be a bumbling retard with my job coach so she doesn't find out i'm perfectly capable of working but just don't want to
>>220610118Plan on leaving soon when I can get some beznos and just drink into an eternal slumber
>>220610137It’s horrible to shout at people too
>>220610147no i was always scared to try that, could set my hair on fire or something
>>220606963>>220606963
NEW>>220583004>>220583004>>220583004>>220583004
He's done it again, ladies and gentlemen
well that's not the new, but he never said it was
love those violent poos where its like youre being raped backwards
>>220610223>>220610223>>220610223
