>>47560925Would Yuyuko be the best or worst? She can kill you at any moment, but that also means that you can't even have the illusion that you will escape her and where's the fun in that?
>>47561012She might even kill you right off the bat just so you can stay with her forever as a ghost. The Yama will have to step in eventually to do something about her hoarding a soul to herself and it will be then that Yuyuko has to decide whether she will rebel against the netherworld itself for the sake of love.
>>47560925They're yandere for each other and think you're standing in the way.They'll slowly tear you to pieces and then have hot yuri sex.
>>47561151Or she will give you some useless job in the netherworld so you can be a ghost forever like her.
>>47561273Would Yama show favoritism like that for Yuyuko?
>>47560925I don't know why, but Alice always struck me as a good yandere.
>>47561523keeping the netherworld stable is probably more important than one random guy's life
>>47561523If you get killed by Yuyuko you're not acheaving enlightment, working in the Netherworld is actually an improvement.The real question is whether Eiki would call out Yuyuko for her relation with her subordinate.
>>47561564She would.
>>47561537How replaceable is Yuyuko as far as netherworld infrastructure goes, I wonder? Is she an essential fixture or could Yama easily just promote someone from within to take her spot?
>>47561012>>47561151With someone as deadly as Yuyuko, you only have to fear what she could do to the people around you, It still one of the best yanhus though, considering how you would get to neet, feast and chill for eternity
>>47561828Agreed having a rich yanhu would be far better to than a broke one because at least you get to live in the lap of luxury even if your freedoms are limited.
>>47561843How possessive would Yuyuko be though? Would Youmu be the only other person you'd ever see? (outside of visitors)
>>47561860>How possessive would Yuyuko be though?1000 year old teenage girl with superpowers>Would Youmu be the only other person you'd ever see?Maybe Eiki too, when she comes for inspections.
>>47561980>when she comes for inspections>Anon, are you sure you are not being kidnapped?
>>47561984And behind her is Yuyuko grinning
>>47561860Now what would a yandere Yama be like? She has much more power to potentially abuse.
>>47562099She'd never do anything illegal
>>47562099manipulation and gaslighting. she will make sure that every person you come across will think that you're some kind of horrendous pariah that dooms every person that speaks to you to all 7 trials of the Underworld. then she will come out of nowhere and try to sooth your damaged psyche. she might even try and gaslight you into thinking the rumors true. there are however few individuals that dosent fear Eiki's judgement. you may be a little to elated to finally have a new person to talk to... and Eiki is sure to take note of that elation.
>>47562099She'd be lawful about anything she did, I'm sure the ministry has all sorts of bylaws she could exploit and would know about as part of her job. She could choose to stick close to you in life out of some fixation, trying to fix you out of knowledge that you'd suffer.If you make it? Congrats, maybe she'll try seducing you in turn. Maybe you have a really cute romance. She'll likely use her experience and knowledge to convince you that an afterlife spent working in the ministry is a good idea, she'll work with you a lot in this regard and make sure your job isn't too bad. I'm sure the Yama has a right to choose her assistants. Maybe it'll be a Heida kind of arrangement, she can't have you forever but came have you 100 years on and 100 off.If not? Rehabilitation time! Either Anon was bad apple that she simply needs to fix, or he's a lost sheep that needs guiding. If the first, it won't be pleasant as your soul would have to suffer to atone for things and Eiki knows this is just. However, Eiki would fuss over you in between these punishments. Applying medicines and giving you the only comfort there is in this literal hellscape, by the end of things you'll likely cling to Eiki and hinge on her every word. The oni certainly won't give you any companionship! Though if you're lucky and she simply sees you as misguided she'll likely assign you to a remedial program, with likely much less torture! Expect to have your rehabilitation interrupted every now and then for through inspection of your soul and path! Eiki won't let you slip up again!
>>47562156What if I am not a faggot, and dont care about being an outcast? What is she going to do then?
>>47561828The weaker ones also have their appeal too, they might have a weaker ability by they can compensate with pure willpower.
>>47562344Imagine having a fairy try it. You can kill her with relative ease but she'll just be back later.
>>47562404Maybe they're a little too weak, it just becomes annoying at some point. But between someone like Yuyu or Eiki who are too strong and the fairies who are too weak there has to be some sort of goldilocks zone.
Get your own 2hu wife here : https://randomtouhougen.neocities.orgWarning : Her sanity are not guaranteed.Can include lovesickness, clingness, gaslighting, bullying, crazyness, violence, rape (I hope not) and... Well just enjoy your "happy" life.
>>47562593If only there was another rng thing to generate a mental illness too.
>>47562598Is internet not enough for you?
>>47562515Maybe one of the human characters who you could theoretically beat up if you got the drop on her.
I'm not even going to understand 2/3 of the things she says.
>>47562632That aplies to most characters since they speak japanese, but heterodiegetic King James English is not THAT hard to understand.
>>47562649>speak japanese...Shit, fair point
At least she might speak English since she's friends with Heca...Hopefully.
>>47562660Oh this is gonna be... Really wild...
I wonder what kind of dance is expressed through anxiety and depression? Will she just menacingly dance behind my back as I'll never know?
>>47562593You should be honored to be chosen by a goddess
>>47562593I feel like i'm in danger guys!
>>47562690Oh, I do feel honored to be the chosen one of the Ultimate, Absolute, Secret, God Empress of Gensokyo!
Looks like my harvests are going to be bountiful. With her help I will become the harvest king of Gensokyo and gain a monopoly on the wheat being sold in the human village. I could even run a protection racket so that other farmers would have to pay me a fee to prevent me from getting Minoriko to ruin their crops. The only way I can see this going wrong is if the villagers get sick of my shit and decide to murder me or if my monopoly on wheat is somehow harmful to the status quo of Gensokyo and Reimu comes to bash my head in for it.
>>47562692Hi! Renko's grandpa! Do you have stories for us old man?
>>47562598Ok faggot, I made a shitty roulette just for youhttps://tools-unite.com/tools/random-picker-wheel?inputs=Generalized Anxiety Disorder:1,Panic Disorder:1,Social Anxiety Disorder:1,Specific Phobias:1,Mood Disorders:1,Depression:1,Bipolar Disorder:1,Cyclothymic Disorder:1,Psychotic Disorders:1,Schizophrenia:1,Eating Disorders:1,Anorexia Nervosa:1,Bulimia Nervosa:1,Binge Eating Disorder:1,Impulse Control and Addiction Disorders:1,Pyromania (starting fires):1,Kleptomania (stealing):1,Compulsive Gambling:1,Substance Abuse Disorders (alcohol and drugs):1,Personality Disorders:1,Antisocial Personality Disorder:1,Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder:1,Histrionic Personality Disorder:1,Schizoid Personality Disorder:1,Paranoid Personality Disorder:1,Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD):1,Intrusive thoughts and compulsive behaviors:1,Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD):1,Symptoms following a traumatic event:1,Choose mental illness:1,Stress Response Syndromes (formerly Adjustment Disorders):1,Dissociative Disorders (e.g.:1,Dissociative Identity Disorder:1,Depersonalization Disorder):1,Factitious Disorders (intentionally creating or feigning symptoms):1,Sexual and Gender Disorders :1,Sexual Dysfunction:1,Gender Identity Disorder:1,Paraphilias):1,Somatic Symptom Disorders (excessive focus on physical symptoms):1,Tic Disorders (involuntary movements or sounds:1,Tourette’s Syndrome:1
>>47562593So she'll just delete all the history I've had with any other human being? then on a full moon create endless fake history between me and her?
>>47562758I'm afraid so. Well, at least you will have a happy life. (surely, maybe.)
>>47562692For better or for worst, she probably does speak english. Now go have children, this timeline depends on it.
>>47562719Well, well, well. I sure do have some stories. But my memory is kind of wacky so you'll have to wait a while until I remember something!>>47562816Oh she do speak english. better than me And it's for the worst of the internet and the people because she's shitposting a lot. But for me it's for the best because I find this funny, expect when her autism kick in and start doing weird stuff. Also I don't think i'm ready for children.
>>47561012Sakuya would be the worst. You can't see her coming, you can't escape her and you can't stop her from doing whatever she wants to you without you knowing a single thing about it. It's like an eldritch horror so above you you can't do anything about it
>>47561564>The real question is whether Eiki would call out Yuyuko for her relation with her subordinate.This is Eiki we're talking about. She will not only call her out for that but also for abusing her authority, forcing herself on someone, taking them from other etc.She will also lecture Yuyuko on how this love us one-sided abd thus not true love due to tge fact that the other party is unhappy etc. etc.
>>47561012>>47562943I think it's good to assume they get off your fear, so Sakuya will only use her power to scare and assault you and Yuyuko will only kill you once everything else fails.
>>47562962Anon would see Eiki as their savour and probably fall in love with her.
>>47563115And it would piss Yuyuko off.
>>47562593Can i take her with me to the outside world? I could really use the shade
>>47563166Yes but you're going to have to become a serial killer to feed her.
>>47562593Isn't she married?
>>47562593She's going to keep me in her web forever, isn't she?
>>47563392You're technically a pet so it's not cheating.
>>47563211Ngl, that would sound like a good black comedy to read.
>>47563166Yes, yes. You can. Even tho the outside world wouldn't be a nice experience for her.>>47563392Nah, it's fine. And she have a whole lot of pluses. You can play lottery and always win with her! To say one plus.>>47563421I'm afraid so...
>>47563436I guess that makes sense.>>47563484>You can play lottery and always win with her!You've made me curious.
>>47563520Long story short. She's really REALLY lucky.
>>47562593How unfortunate.
>>47563211How much does she eat? If its just for calories it wouldnt be all that many people i thinkModern people probably taste worse though, i might have to learn how to season it well
>>47562886Tell me how you meet Renko's grandma.
>>47563392Haha anon got used goods
I'm perfectly fine with this.
>>47562593Uooooooooh!!!!!! Sanae sama, please rape me!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
>>47563604You could have one person last a variety of meals, humans are calorie dense!
>>47563604What if it's a fast food type situation where it is bad for her but it's also delicious?
>>47563640Considering the nature of this thread, "met" is probably not the right word. It's more like "tell us how she broke into your house and tried to put a spell on you".
>>47560925I want Ran Yakumo to be my yanderehu forced wife so bad...
>>47564147Man, some yanhus have it way easier than others.
How would the random Yanhu handle your disinterest and insistence on pursuing the one you would rather be in a relationship with?
>>47562593I'll never be sober again
>>47562629Or a mid-powered youkai, those would probably be strong enough to scare you but wouldn't instantly kill you.
>>47563604She's known not to attack humans because it's too much hassle, so probably not a whole lot. And who knows, perhaps she can be sated through animal meat, she just never really tried.But then again it's more likely she gets fed just through her legend and general fear of a man-eating youkai, so if you're taking her out of Gensokyo you might have to get her to at least scare some homeless people by spreading rumors or chomping off an arm or a leg or something. If you're not careful in keeping your operation small you'll get FBI on your asses and that's game over for both of you.
>>47565612Do not accept a drink from her!
>>47565080Lethallythese are inhuman monstersthey either lack human morals or are too powerful to care
>>47561993What's Yuyuko gonna do if I snich on her to her boss?
>>47562593Eternal Life with my Hime Wife
>>47570543Why would you do that, she would treat you with nothing but kindness. Sure, it's not consensual, but what better life can you have? If you ever get in that position in the first place, you should just cut your losses and accept Yuyu's love.
What if yandere yuri
>>47562593I imagine her traveling thru time again and again until I accept her confession, each time trying some differnt trick.
>>47573023She'll constantly talk about Gensokyo and how nice it is to make you want to go there, and then tell you she has the only reliable way to do that.
sometimes i wish i was in the universe where i never discovered touhou and latched onto it as an enabler for everything wrong with me
>>47570620Would she stalk you herself or send Eirin and Reisen to do it?
>>47561653What responsibilities does she even have?
>>47562943All I'm hearing is that Sakuya would be the best yanhu.
>>47562593This actually might have been the worst possible result. Maybe it will be ok if I just stay calm?
>>47562593Is this good or not? I'm afraid to ask. And also, am I going to get harassed by Yukari as well?
>>47573403I actually have no idea. Maybe a Yuyuko expert here can enlighten us.
>>47573023Try rolling a second time and see if you get her again.
>>47564054You're going to Alice
>>47573290If CDS if anything to go by, Kaggers would sneak out of Eientei and stalk you herself.
>>47573768Didn't get her again. Why? Was something supposed to happen?
>>47574431Oh, I was just very irresponsibly trying to see if Renkoanon's experience would repeat.
>>47574470I think I need a more thorough explanation.
>>47574575Someone rolled Renko twice in two separate yandere threads. The chances for that are something like one in a ten thousand. Soon after that he had a dream about Renko where she tried to explain something about physics and the nature of reality to anon.
>>47574601So is that where the Renko threads came from?
>>47573588Merry got rolled in all the last yanhu threads. Like three people have rolled her now, the only explanation is the Merrys from alternate timelines all come to find boyfriends here.>>47574431Looks like Windows Yumemi is more forward than her pc98 counterpart. Makes sense since Renko's more autistic.A peaceful, magic-filled life in Gensokyo sounds pretty good.>>47574617The first Renko thread actually came before I rolled her a second time.
>>47561653Her abilities came before her position so I can see the Yama giving her the job because she would cause way more trouble otherwise. In other words, any anon she abducts is fucked.
>>47575452>the only explanation is the Merrys from alternate timelines all come to find boyfriends here.Merry hasn't found a proper conduit yet. >The first Renko thread actually came before I rolled her a second time.Yes, it allowed her to establish a presence here before tethering onto you. Maybe we need a Maribel thread that isn't shit so that she too can arrive to our midst.
>>47562593Not much of an autumn guy, but she's pretty cute
>>47575728>He doesn't know
>>47562712>>47575728We are now brothers in law. Do you want in on the family hustle?
>>47562593Im going to finally touch grass
>>47575783I don't know...
>>47576114I want a nice quaint life, harvesting crops
>>47576114I wouldn't post this here if I were you. You're giving Reimu tips on how to find the culprit of the Harvest Bubble Incident.
if I ever try to leave her she is just going to trap me into an endless loop until I apologize and I come back to her.
>>47562593This can be anywhere from annoying to threatening.
>>47577240She is going to pressure you into getting a job as a netherworld bureaucrat and have you locked in an office doing paperwork by yourself where only she has access to you.
>>47577327I won at life!
>>47562758Keine has to be one of the best. She will eat your history with any girl she feels threatened by and after every full moon night you will have some new "history" with her that never actually happened.
>>47563115Eiki moggs Yuyuko with the most attractive quality a woman can have: a virtuous soul.
>>47578576Awww. I really hope you can find your own Yamaxanadu.
>>47562593>>47574397Wasn't sure what to expect but I have been incidentally consuming quite a bit related to her as of late. Saw a small portion of a very beautifully animated movie about her the other day...I'm...not sure how to feel over this. Time stopping maids are one thing but how am I supposed to be able to deal with total potential manipulation over the duration of every instant I spend with this princess, let alone comprehend what she's doing? How much of myself and my things will she go on to effect for her sake with what drive she'd have? I don't think I'll have a big chance to react here before I'm within the Houraisan Danger Zone!Maybe this is because of that one time I handled some of her sacred treasures in a dream. She would easily be able to play the long con in that sense. I didn't even know what I was doing at the time...I did select the Kaguya Route without knowing it the first time I played IN as well. We could at least bond over video games.Also, do I need to now potentially worry about fighting >>47570620 to the death? It'd be nice if it didn't have to come to that but maybe that other anon has more drive than myself.
Yandere Shimmy shrinks you smaller than her with the mallet, so she can have you all to herself
>>47562593"Oh hi! Haven't seen you around the bookstore lately! Could it be that you haven't had the time to read lately or, it couldn't be...have you lost interest in literature?!""No? You've just been getting books from another place? Ehhh, could you tell me where? I'm interested in all kinds of books after all! You don't remember? Come now, that's way too silly to forget a place you've been to after all!""Say, why don't you come by Suzunaan tomorrow? I can show you a special book I'm sure you haven't ready yet..."
>>47563211OR you become a really good imitation chef who constantly tricks her into think that the meat you make for her is human flesh, to the extent that she finds a corpse one day, tries it, and finds it's taste totally lacking in comparison.Kind of makes me think about some folklore, but I can't recall which.
>>47579174Which treasure did you handle and in what way?
>>47580969I had the bowl in my right hand and the branch in the left. For some reason I was tasked with getting them to the Palanquin Ship, lost the branch as soon as I stepped on somehow but had the bowl all the way up to the end of the dream. Treated them as best as I could after being dropped in the lake as a start. Figured I was looking for one of the Myouren girls if nothing else but I never made it far enough.It's not like I was the one who snagged those items away from her. Maybe she'd understand?If we are going by Yandere sensibilities though then I have a lot of explaining to do.
>>47581185Your dream self is really intelligent. Since the bowl is from the Buddha, imagine what the Myouren Temple would pay you to have it as a relic.
Frankly I wasn't even thinking of the monetary value at the time but you bring up a good point there. Although with how little I was informed on things from the outset I figured I was just a Patsy in some larger scheme regardless of profits. If Byakuren wanted those objects that badly then it's not like they could just go storm Eientei without raising some questions anyways. I was aware of the thematic significance after I woke up of course, earlier it occurred to me the supermoon is currently imminently upon us as well.Appreciate the sentiment over my dream self though. Whenever I do manage to dream in my own subconscious I have an extended history of getting into really involved scenarios that I'm either perfectly aware of in the moment or ideally ignorant to until some point down the line. I won't get into that much here though. If I end up with some crazed & passionate Lunarian at the foot of my bed or chasing me through bamboo stalks as I sleep however I'll do my best to report on things post-confrontation.
>>47581276Adding to that, the branch is from Mt. Horai, which is where Taoist immortals are said to live. So, in a way, it was a choice between Taoism, Buddhism and Kaguya.Also, I don't think the object were in Eientei.
>>47560925I want to be fucked by them, hard
>>47581312Even Wriggle?
>>47581298Once you choose Kaguya you can never go back...>>47581312What I'm partially afraid of but these are the gambles we take in threads like this.
>>47579174>Also, do I need to now potentially worry about fighting >>47570620 (You) # to the death?Nah don't worry. We're going to abuse the concept of the Multiverse by giving each anon their own Gensokyou where the only diffrance to the original is the fact that one 2hu is in yanderelove with them
>>47581378Sounds like a plan. Hope you enjoy that time with her then.Surely no unforeseen ever-reaching causal consequences could arise from all this!
Getting fucked by Kaguya for an eternity doesn't sound so bad
>>47562593Guess we're starting this one off with a funeral. Rest in peace.
>>47581401Especially since with her ability she can counter the heat death of the universe and make sure that at the very least the Bamboo Forest and Eientei will remain there for all eternity as well
>>47574397>Kaggers would sneak out of Eientei and stalk you herself.That's pretty cute, especially if she's not good at it whatsoever
>>47581506By CDS, Mokou would help her break out. You'd have a shipper on your hand, one who occasionally tells you to resolve your problems with the 'guya by punching her
>>47581330ESPECIALLY Wriggle.
>>47581401Kaguya will never drain your balls dry for all eternity...
>>47581470Yes>>47581499No, fuck off>>47581601God I really wish she would
>>47582033>No, fuck offPretty gay to refuse a great futa like that but to each their own.
>>47581378Every character in Gensokyo has at least one "clone" or alternate universe version or something like that.Source: Black Tewi.
>>47580062This would make for a really good story.
>>47560925Yandere? They look like they accidentally took a selfie with a red eye filter on while fiddling with a phone in Kourindou or something.
>>47581601Not with that attitude
>>47585809its real trendy in Gensokyo
>>47560925Which 2hu would make the worst yandere?
>>47586513I'd say Miko, but can't really explain why.
>>47586513The one you hate the most.If you mean "worst" as in "actually useless" then Dai or Lily. Maybe Waggy if you stay far away from the lake, but then again she is actually smart enough to ask her friends to grab you for her and then it's off to the rape cave with you.If you mean "worst" as in "you will suffer a fate worse than death if you defy her" then there's a couple of contestants, among them Kaguya with her immortality juice, Sakuya and her ability to spy on you and do fucked up things including separate time stop orgasm torture rape sessions every five seconds, Yukari and her creative use of gaps, Hina and her misfortune, Shinki because she's a goddes with her own pocket dimension, etc.
>>47581601Why even live...
>>47586719I was more thinking which 2hu would be the least likely to be a yandere. That Sakuya stuff sounds terrifying though.
>>47563640Well, well, well. How do I met Sumireko? It's was somewhere around the autumn 2017 in the Kanto region, in a school. I was the new student and kind in a pitch because I only speak some broken pieces of Japanese, English quite good but my autism would definitively kick in because I'm afraid of crowds and of being new in a place. Well, let's get to the point shall we? I saw Sumireko the first time in the classroom, she was dazing at the window, looking at nothing. She didn't notice me, I was too afraid to speak to anyone and I was sweating buckets and holy cow, the teacher was late. I'll spare you the details and the presentation than I fucked up hard enough to give everyone a good laugh and got myself in the detention room for my first day. Talk about successful fail. But anyway, I got myself in the detention room with nothing else to do here. Expect reading books, hanging out with the “heels” and stuff like that. And then I hear someone speaking English to me: “Hey, you're the joker that screwed his first day and gave everyone a good laugh?” I turn around and see Sumireko in the same room of mine, one table away. So yeah, I reply: “Well, I didn't even wanted to throw shit in the fan but it's came back into my face. Just autism kicked in harder than a VTEC engine.” Having said that, I look at her and ask her: “So, why you're here? Did you tried to see a bright future using the teach's crystal ball?”I rubbed my hair to send her a hint than I was talking about the teach's bald head and Sumireko chuckled at my joke: “Pffftttt! Nah, I just got caught sleeping during the class because they're boring.”I replied : “Merde! I would get into trouble for that! Or should I just register them in case I have insomnia. Speaking of with, would you like to give me you're name?”“Sure, It's Sumireko Usami.” After she said her name, we both spoke about ourselves and I kind of become her joker. More are about to come but first I need some booze.(damned 4chan 2000 character limit.)>>47564964Ooooh boy, one day i'll talk about this part.
>>47586513>>47581402Akyuu on account of being dead.
>>47580082Reminds me of that Fallout New Vegas hotel quest with the cannibals, where you can trick them into eating non-human meat
>>47562593Welp, I'm boned.
>>47562593Shit, I dont want to become a teacher.
>>47588306The mafia bosses are the hardest ones to see as a yandere because why and how would their affection even begin
>>47588506Boss wants something. Boss must have it.
>>47588530>Boss wants something. Boss must have it.true but given how the animal realm feel about humans there's more than likely going to be some form of protest or at worst, a plan to kick them out of the leadership position if she shows favoritism
>>47562593Really happy with the roll, but I have to wonder what she has planned for me. If I'm lucky I end up strapped into to one of her machines, if I'm unlucky she takes my shirikodama and keeps it as a personal possession.
>>47588552Protest agains Yuuma: get eatenProtest against Yachie: get mind controlledProtest against Saki: get booted out of the whole ass realmAny questions?
>>47588558if they can't do anything to the bosses then that just makes yourself the targetexpect to permanently go missing
>>47587648She will reincarnate and until then, she can haunt you as a ghost.
>>47588711She doesn't have to go to a reincarnation waiting room or something?
>>47573580Is Hatate better or worst than Aya?
>>47586826Sakuya is always super terrifying when it comes to the possibility of her bing a yandere. She's one of the few 3hus where you have no chance of escape. She can do some many thing to you and you would be completely unaware of it due to time shenanigans. Plus she could be everywhere and appear at anytime.Yandere!Sakuya is something straight out if a horror movie
>>47578648I'm still holding out hope.
>>47562593Pretty sure she can just say "Anon will never love me" and she wins.
>>47561533It fits well with her being both a scary witch living alone in the forest and a bit of a loser.
>>47562593This has the potential to be quite the horror story>>47562750>ParaphiliasI guess it really depends on which ones she has
>>47594007Anon your schizophrenia is acting up again. Have you forgotten to take your meds?
>>47594080As a matter of fact I did forget, thanks for the reminderWhat does that have to do with anything?
>>47589028That's the horror of Sagume Yandere, she's already won before the game begins and you're helpless against it. Rivals won't be an issue because she's 100% sure you'll be with her in the end, even if you're aware of her manipulation all your efforts to change the outcome will fail, and Sagume could do whatever she wants in the meantime. Maybe the story would be more about her perspective on the matter, because maybe you'll fall in love with her, but someone else could take you for a spin before that...>>47588506For Yachie: Say you're a human spirit who didn't agree with the whole Kiki plot and decided to throw yourself in the mafia game, getting yourself to a good enough rank by using others and playing rivals against you. Yachie would surely want a lieutenant like that to keep an eye on Human Spirits and could slowly become possessive of the capability. She seems like the type who's possessive at least.Yuuma: Be someone who's just totally apathetic to the whole political situation. Maybe you make a living at a food stand or something refining whatever weird food niche you've filled and get away from paying protection money by strategically moving your spot or just running away taking advantage of the food stand's wheels. Yuuma would like such a free person as a chef, but you wouldn't be the type to be chained down by being in any sort of gang, so she'd catch you, you'd escape, and eventually it'd become a obsession of her's to have you to herself.Saki: Act totally belligerently and beastly despite being a human spirit. Say things like "I'd rather die then live under someone's thumb!" and really mean it. Be covered in scars from head to toe and willing to fight dirty in the streets in order to win. Whatever victories you scrape by own, plus your endurance and pure-heartedness could win her over, but your total insistence on solitude would eventually drive her nuts.You could combine attributes to pit two mob bosses against each other as well.
>>47594671Sagume's hardest job would be getting you to the Lunar Capital. Unless she can send a few rabbits to do the job or convince Toyohime to help , I don't see how she could do it.
>>47589028and the joke is that she can't bring herself to say it because she refuses to aknowledge this as a possibility
>>47588557She wants you to test out this invention she made.
>>47594814But why would she choose the hard route? How else would she even meet an earthling?
>>47594718>getting you to the Lunar CapitalThere are a few ways she can go about it.She could make Anon an astronaut and have him come to her. But this would take a bit too long.She could attack the Earth and only make peace if they give up Anon. But this would be a bit too on the nose.She could convine Toyohime that it's just one earthling, she'll take care of him and nothing bad will happen. But it's only a matter of time until Yorihime finds out.Or she could just take a trip to Earth every so often. But this isn't a permanent solution.And there are probably even more plans I didn't think of. After all, Sagume is ine of the best schemer out there.
>>47562593I had some dreams involving Gensokyo and into getting into nice conversations about science and philosophy with Yukari lately. Then I wake up, see this thread, get a roll, first roll is Yukari. I'm insanely lucky or screwed?
>>47589028>>47594814>>47596559Sagume's ability isn't that the opposite of what she says happens. It's that she reverses the flow of a situation when she talks about it. If you were slowly falling in love with her, and she said "you'll never fall in love with me", then you would fall out of love with her, because she reversed the situation. If her power was just opposite day, she wouldn't have to be so careful about speaking and she could change reality itself without trying. Her ability requires her to be careful, understand the flow of a situation, and make very careful comments when she does use her ability. And I imagine she's smart enough that she wouldn't even need to use her ability most of the time, planning is enough.The real question is how she'll get you to fall in love with her despite being an effective mute.
>>47600420>The real question is how she'll get you to fall in love with her despite being an effective mute.Text to Speech. It worked for the Emperor
>>47600443Imagine Sagume seducing a Anon with the Microsoft Sam voice.
>>47600420Couldn't she then, say, punch Anon in the guts to make him hate her and then talk about it?
>>47600388Yukari's not messing around. She went for the dream first and the roll second, not taking any chances here.
>>47600638She's punching him with the plan of making him fall in love with her, so it wouldn't work
>>47600388>I'm insanely lucky or screwed?A bit of both, really. Watch out for any Yukari related things in your life.
>>47600388These type of posts just keep on happening
>>47601418For some reason they happened at least twice in a yandere thread. Is that archetype conducive to this kind of stuff?
>>47600388>I'm insanely lucky or screwed?Depends how much you like napping and trains
>>47562593So does this mean I don't really have to think about her until there's a full moon? Since it's Were-Keine specifically, I imagine the normal version doesn't really care about me.
>>47602404This will probably be very confusing. I imagine her coming over on a full moon to create some history with you, and then the next day she eats it, only to repeat this cycle next month.You wouldn't even know what's real and what's fake at that point.
>>47602449That sounds like a fun basis for a story. A different backstory every rendezvous. Countless lifetimes written and deleted just for one night of love each month.
>>47573752The best Yuyuko expert is Youmu, ask her
>>47602494Would Youmu give an honest answer or try to make her boss sound more important and responsible than she really is?
>>47600388Keep yourself as reasonably grounded as you can throughout the sprawling paths ahead, Anon.You wouldn't want to end up wasting such potential for greater opportunities together now would you~?Now if only the half-phantom were here to clear up confusions around >>47573403, she may have some bias but she's earnest & simple enough to give as straight-forward of an answer as you can get from her.Even if she is the one actually doing most of the grunt work there. Yuyuko's typical interests aren't exactly always the most...inherently altruistic.
>>47600466>>47600443Imagine finally meeting your new moonie owner, she opens her mouth only to... write on a little rabbitco tablet that she is your new master in yukkuri voice...
>>47603054These two look like they're yandere for each other.
>>47603183Debatably so. Depends on who the focus is really on.
>>47601418>>47602343>>47600388My theory is that a disaster is about to happen, maybe a war or something else big that will kill a lot of anons. So now the hus with the means are out in force trying to kidnap their destined ones. It's romantic, but a sign of doom if I've ever seen one. Imagine Yukari waking up for anything but bullying moonies and playing with Yuyu
>>47603219If that is true, then it makes sense that Yukari and Renko would be the ones to take action since they already know the future.
>>47600388it sounds like you're important to her. maybe she will even take a bath for you.
>>47602343If there is anything to the idea of daimons, guardian angels and other guiding/protective spirits frequently manifesting as members of the opposite sex and that sometimes interactions with them become eroticaly charged then "yandere" might be closer to it than many would think. Think about it. Member of the opposite sex - has great interest in constantly following you - passionately attached to you - might become intrusive if you don't share the interest...>>47603219That is quite the dire possibility. There are quite many things that could go wrong in the near future after all. WW3, the Solar storms, what the everloving fuck is going on with the "UAP" phenomenon, whatever is causing the heightened spirit activity that has been long manifesting as people getting more into spiritual side of things... Some people over at /x/ even talk of the "dimensional merge" thing that Chris-Chan was talking about...probably as a joke, but there have been too many cases where funny jokes turned out to be true on some level. Much to think about for certain! Maybe next time someone should try making a "which 2hu will be your spirit guide in the coming time of challenges and changes". The results might be interesting!>>47603796Yukari-san can also get out of Gensokyo much more easily than most 2hus. Anyway, I won't be poisoning the well here beyond this. It's just really fascinating that "these type of posts just keep on happening". Have fun! Just remember that where attention goes, there energy flows and most anime girls were inspired by an interaction with a spirit that the artist had.
>>47603219At some point playing with the same friend gets boring, maybe she just wanted a man that her and Yuyu can play with.
>>47603120Wait a bit, who said anything about "owners"?
>>47605158Boy, do I have a surprise for you!
>>47603202Imagine what would they do to you if they both thought you're a threat to the other.
>>47606370Nah I'd win
>>47606488Being raped by Yuyuko is a win I guess...
>>47605158>he is unaware
>>47606628What should I be aware of exactly?
>>47606535Getting killed by Yukari or Yuyuko isn't
>>47606838But he'd win, he said so himself
>>47606628Come on, tell me.
>>47606865I somewhat doubt him. Yuyuko is hard to beat since you only live with her consent.
>>47607702But Anon said he'd win, why would he lie?
>>47607754I think Yuyuko let Anon win to give him a false sense of safety.
>>47606628I'm certaintly unaware of who are you quoting.
>>47607702Taking this into consideration, yandere Yuyu becomes even better if she keeps Anon alive and threatens to kill him if he disobeys. You don't know what being a ghost is like and as long as you are alive there is still the chance that you will die a natural death so you have all the reasons in the world to just do what she wants.
And then someone roll Yuyuko first try...
>>47609692It's funny how she got discussed so much without even being rolled
>>47608641You, myself, I, and anon
>>47605158That anon did and so will Sagume when she comes around
>>47562593How would she be a yandere? Does an over attached pet count as a yandere?
>>47610736Yeah, I din't expect the Yuyuko discution to last this long.
>>47562593Not sure what this means but I'm happy with it.
>>47562593Wat nou?
>>47613450KFC is off limits, and you never get a sore throat again unless you do something that would make her sad. You wouldn't make her sad, right?
So.......What now?She showed up twice for me, back to back like the other guys with Renko, Merryberry, and Yukari.I had a dream about the mansion last night, too......>>47603868Hello again. Glad to see you're still around.
>>47613680Luckily I'm a vegan, so yes.
>>47562593Not too bad, given how much I hate summer and the heat in general. Good source of free cooling and snow cones during the warmer months, but what will I do when it's winter? Her presence would surely only make cold days only colder. There is also the small matter of the fact that I do not want to do anything romantic with her. Would she be cool with just being friends if she can't change her body shape to something taller?
>>47613754>She showed up twice for me, back to back like the other guys with Renko, I bet we all wish we knew, don't we? >Hello again. Glad to see you're still around.Hello again to you too. There is a whole new thread for "these type of posts that just keep on happening".>>47586518
>>47614909Remi needs me?(Thanks)
>now flan wants onegod damn it, brosi don't wanna be stuck in a basement...
>>47615330Maybe you are what she needs to get out of the basement, take that as you will.
>>47565612>>47569430Would Suika even need spiked drinks? Pretty sure she can just give you normal alcohol until you drop.
>>47616666You may drop, but the sake never does!
>>47562593Well shit, looks like I'm dead.>>47613450Eiki really needs to rein in her subordinates.
>>47616709Suika's way of being a yandere is aggressively peer pressuring you to drink copious amounts of sake
What if...Your yanhu... Was a futa?
>>47620242what id...you just went to >>>/d/ ...instead of spamming your shitty fetish in every single thread?
>>47620573Futa is cool tho.
>>47620573If you don't like that, then what would you do to avoid your 2hu?
>>47615330Imagine Flan sneaking out of the basement to terrorize you.
>>47620242What if....I fucked you with a rake, Vlad the impaler style?
>>47620962Nah, man, you're thinking of Futo.
What if...Your yanhu...Was a Futo?
>>47624622I'd try to see how many fires I can manipulate her into starting before she gets caught.
>>47624631I was thinking of buying some fire extinguishers but your idea is probably better. But do you really think prison will stop her? Bear in mind, it didn't stop Renko.
>>47624646Much like a Batman villain, she'll break out in no time and be back on her arson game.
>>47624652That's actually pretty accurate to her character.
>>47562632>>47562649Actually, Futo's shikaisen abilities allow her to speak any language in the world, but only the archaic versions.
>>47562593Excellent. She thinks she can do whatever she wants because of her gaps, but what would she do if I punished her hubris by jumping right into the gap myself? What's in there? Do I want to potentially die finding out? The answer is yes. I WILL unlock the mysteries of the gap realm and either return an enlightened man or not at all.
>>47624734In that situation, aren't you becoming the yandere chasing her across dimentions until she gives up?
>>47624829It's okay, I'm not explicitly chasing her. I just want to see the gap realm. Just a peek, Yukari. I'll just look around for a few minutes then leave.
>>47624883I've heard this one before. "Trust me, I'm not chasing you. I'm only inside your house to see what it looks like", "Don't worry, I'll leave your dreams imediatly, I just want to show you this cool drawing!".Don't worry, Yukari probably likes it, it's been many years since a man approached her.
>>47624955Does that mean she's not a virgin
>>47624955Yandere vs yandere! I bet she would think it's very rousing!
>>47624959She may still be! She was once talk of the town with her huge tits that she made her friend insecure with, but was never the type to make hard choices like choosing a man.
>>47623793Futa Futo?
>>47624955Yukari presumably has every advantage when dealing with things that fall into the gap realm. She's in no danger at all! Perfectly safe to just let me float around in the void seeing what there is to see. She's got all those eyes in there to make sure I'm not doing anything weird too.
>>47621108no 2hu has genitals, they reproduce asexually
>>47625038
>>47624622Hide all the plates in the house.
>>47624734>>47625043You'd get borred quickly, it's mostly just train sets.
>>47625149I hope she has one of those real trains in the void. I'd want to get in and take a seat. Look out the window and into the void.
>>47625204She most likely doesn't, but will make one just for you so you stay around more.
>>47625403My own train car in the cold dark void between time and space... The perfect place to hang out on a hot summer day.
>>47625501I'm impressed at how you turned the tables of Yukari, has to be the first time this happens in one of these threads.
>>47625556The interior of the gap is the most private place Yukari has. She won't know what think if someone was bold enough to jump in there on their own volition.
>>47625079All according to keikaku.
>>47624646"While you were placing statues, I studied the squat. When you were finding mysterious books, I mastered the kick. While you wasted your days in the woods in pursuit of retrocausality, I cultivated inner rage. And now that the Jizou is on its side and Merry is in a portal you have the audacity to come to me for my autism."
>>47625666She really is a special girl.
>>47625666How do you study retrocausality in the woods?
>>47625852When a big-breasted European college student and fantasy land love each other very much.....
>>47624988Moral of the story: In the end, the nice girl gets the man.
>>47627967The nice girl gets the obsessive man that she was kind to one time.
>>47627987It's better than becoming an untouched hag.
>>47625579"Hahaha! You don't know what you've jumped into, silly man.""Oh you're not scared?! Delaying the inevitable, I see!""You know what? Out of the mercy of my heart, I will allow you to leave, but only this time...Y-You can go now.""It's been hours...HOURS! Leave already! When I come to your house, I only stay there for a few MINUTES! Please, PLEASE, LEAVE ALREADY!!!"
>>47628221Meanwhile the dude is just floating around in the void with his eyes closed enjoying the sensory deprivation experience of a lifetime.
>>47628245tfw you want to enjoy the peace and quiet of the void but some hag keeps monologuing next to you
touhou bros what track is this again at 11:40https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QQOE-86Taxc
>>47628845Agreeing to marry Yukari on the condition that you get unlimited access to the gap dimension. Somehow failing to account for the fact that she will be in there with you too more often than not...
>>47628991You win some you loose some
I wander what Ran and Chen would do in this situation.
>>47627967>>47628000Go home, Renko. Don't you have anything better to do?
>>47629148Chen would go off and play somewhere. Ran would be the one physically holding Yukari back every time she gets one of these silly ideas.
>>47629022But you live to fight another day.
>>47629381What silly ideas would Yukari get?
>>47629148Chen laughs while Ran stays still, not nowing what to do, because Yukari's plan succeeded but she didn't think of the consequences.
>>47562593I got Sekibanki.
>>47633230What can we deduce about this man based on this screen?
>>47633278First and foremost that he rolled Sekibanki
>>47560925I always thought Satori would be a good yandere since you can't have any privacy with her, but is she too easy to get rid off?
>>47562593I like birb, but if it's yandere then one slip up means I'll have super cancer
>>47634769Okuu wouldn't hurt you, she loves youEveryone around you though, they better run
>>47633230>>47633278>What can we deduce about this man based on this screen?*KRASHES*
>>47634935faster than her danmaku
>>47562593
>>47635456Think of Eiki lovingly watching you day and night, lovingly judging your every move, forever. On the bright side, you'll probably go to heaven.
>>47637119>On the bright side, you'll probably go to heaven.Unlikely. She won't let you move on and will try to keep you around as a netherworld bureaucrat so she can keep you around forever.
>>47637147Does the Netherworld really have positions to spare?
>>47637312Yes. Youmu's punching bag.
>>47634769Marisa and Reimu were ok, so there's a chance you'll be too.
>>47562593This can be very scary.I could think I'm laying in bed or walking down the street and in reality I'm getting raped by a rabbit.
>>47638020Is Youmu abandoning sword fighting in favor of boxing?
>>47562593oh no
>>47642037Lucky roll!
>>47642037If I were you, I'd start gambling.
>>47641435I too want Reisen to defile me physically and mentally in every shape or form
>>47641435Are you sure you're on /jp/ right now?
>>47562593I can think of worse fates than getting to live at a shrine on top of a picturesque mountain. I am also down to help her come up with shady schemes to gather faith and destroy her enemies. If she's willing to give me her blessing and with it a portion of her power, I can even be a priest for her and help out in a more personal capacity, not unlike Sanae. I imagine Kanako fawning over a human would rub both Suwako and Sanae the wrong way and they would probably do whatever they can to get rid of me and restore the status quo, at first without killing me but my death would probably be on the table if they can't manage to get rid of me peacefully. My best bet would probably be to try to show them that I'm not all bad but trying to endear myself to them would probably rub Kanako the wrong way in turn. A very delicate situation indeed. Maybe doing my part to solve a mountain incident would be what it takes.
>>47642529>I imagine Kanako fawning over a human would rub both Suwako and Sanae the wrong way and they would probably do whatever they can to get rid of me and restore the status quoWell, Suwako has had her fair share or human love and I'm pretty sure Sanae has to remain a virgin for the job. If anything, I imagine Kanako parading you through both the Youkai Mountain and the Human Village to show that she finally has a human lover, just like all the important gods.
>>47642489>He still believed he is on /jp/
>>47642559>I imagine Kanako parading you through both the Youkai Mountain and the Human Village to show that she finally has a human lover, just like all the important gods.I can definitely see someone like Kanako making a show of it as both a personal flex and a show of letting everyone know who you belong to. "Look at my new priest and consort!" and "If you touch him you answer to a god!" in one statement.
>>47642489>>47642571Oh no. There's no escape, is there?
>>47642626If you are seeing this message then you need to wake up.
>>47628877it sounds like demystify feast to me?
>>47642670How do I do that?
>>47642686Well, first you have to make a snowball.
>>47642730So she will rape me for at least 3-4 more months?What will I even do with the snowball?
>>47560925Pretty good thread
It was fun
That's all folks.
It's funny how this thread started with discussing Yuyu, but no one ended up rolling her.
>>47644726Eiki won