I told this old lady who sleeps all day she should lose some weight and she snapped her back when she tried sit-ups ;_; what do I do now? I'm so sorry
>>48122469I was drinking tea with her in the mansion and she suddenly smiled and said "thank you for choosing me anon!". What the hell is wrong with her? Who would be so desperate to hang out with a loser like me?
>>48122469Flabby old hag
>>48124668my gf looks like that
>>48124668We won't fund her treadmill.
bump
>>48124668
>>48132428Is Chen playing Portal 2?
>>48124668the perfect body type for lap pillowsjust imagine how comfy that would be, no wonder she’s so smugh
>>48124333She just loves you anon, you should love her back.
>>48137577cute train nerdimagine politely indulging a rant about train facts from her only to have her be so encouraged by your interest that she opens gaps and starts dumping trains into the area so she can better illustrate things for you
Yukarin saggers
Mating press
>>48136675I wanna grope the belly
>>48124333>What the hell is wrong with her? Who would be so desperate to hang out with a loser like me?Love is irrational anon
This is adorable
>>48157628>>48157059This artist is a spawn from hell
>>48157654I disagree
>>48153559wtf? where did you find that picture of Yukarin and I?
>>48153559it would be a lot of fun to share in her hobbies
>>48137577>>48138831Yukari abusing her god-like powers to give you an autistim fueled tour of her favourite trains!
>>48153559Even marriage couldn't make her less desperate.Sad!
>>48172362Those bitches
>>48172863Schoolgirls have evolved for millennia to sniff out pathetic hags wherever they go.No matter how much they try to mask it, the truth will always come out.
>>48172362Ran looks hot in a school uniform
I love Yukari so muchThis dorky gap hag needs big happy family correction
>>48124668Made for creating half-youkai.
She’s an evil, lazy, haughty, hag with hygiene issues who doesn’t even deserve her awesome powers and station. But an arguably foolish part of me still likes the Gappy.
Would you like some cookies, anon?
>>48173405They’re not drugged or anything right?
>>48173561Of course not. Yukari is a lot of things, but drugging innocent men is something that disgusts even her. Only desperate girls with creepy eyes would need to resort to that.Auntie Yukarin just wants to see the smile on your face as you enjoy some delicious baked goods. It brings a smile to her face, too.
>>48173617I want to bring a smile to her face by eating her out continuosly
>>48173617>desperate girls with creepy eyes Hmmm, looks familiar here…But you know what? I’ll give her the benefit of the doubt but play it safe. Since you seem confident in her sweetness, why don’t you eat a few of her scrumptious and clean cookies first?
>>48173561She just put her cum in them
>>48172362If you marry Yukari, does Ran become a sister in law or something closer to a step daughter? Also, what about Chen?
>>48170014based
>>48174751I love her goofy ass smile in that pic
>>48177039You’re probably going to make her blush saying that.
>>48176486If you marry Yukari you just become one of her wives, right at the bottom of the totem pole. Chances are Ran and Chen would get permission to grow a dick and use you if they wanted.
>>48174751>why don’t you eat a few of her scrumptious and clean cookies first?Your loss, dude. More for me, then.OM NOM NOM NOM NOM!
>>48178575I’m not sure if it’s Cookie Monstah or the frosty baka eating Yucookies, but how do you feel?
Huge, pretty nails
>>48188800I see the way this artist draws Yukari's smile and understand completely how so many men could die over Helen of Troy.
This morning I had a dream about Yukari, though our interaction was limited to observation. It was at a gas station and she was filling a vending machine up full of gasoline. I distinctly remember she had at least $160 dollars of gas pumped, at a buck fifty that's a bit over a hundred gallons she was pumping in through the machine's coin slot. At some point she stopped and just left, the dream ended shortly after.What did she mean by this?
>>48197930Yukarin-sama is known to sometimes partake in what is frequently referred to as 'just a little bit of trolling ;)'>>48174751They are quite delicious, can confirm.>>48173340She isn't even that evil once you get to know her! She just tends to get lonely is all, I'd say the real foolishness would stem from not giving her at least one chance or two when you can
>>48201686Yukari is still bad. But I would kick myself for the rest of my life if I didn’t *carefully* give her a chance, totally not spiked cookies included here.
>>48202320But whatever she may or may not have spiked them with makes them taste so good...
>>48201686>>48202320>>48202397Let's not get too hasty with the baked sweets now. Really give it a good think. If they look like immaculate little cookies then I have a niggling feeling that she didn't make them herself. The thought counts sure, but these aren't perfect and elegant Yukarin's homemade cookies. She probably isn't going to give you anything she made herself, so what you aughta do is ask her if you could bake them together.
>>48202397This is the baked goods equivalent of a Venus flytrap. Then again, with how powerful Yukari is, she’s only maybe doing an elaborate spiked food trap because simply sucking a bloke through a gap got boring after the last seventy eight times she did it this year and prefers a chase to a prompt catch.>>48202493She can still likely cook and bake better than me. So I’d be all for it to do something with her such as this.Ran had better be on standby with a fire extinguisher though or otherwise ready to intervene.
>>48202493>>48202530Okay you two actually have pretty decent points there. Can't help but imagine that Baking Time with Yukari would only devolve into her telling me what to do and how due to her lack of hands-on experience though, all while watching me with a smile. Still sounds funny to me and fun regardless, high risk of inevitable kitchen shenanigans and/or food meddling after the fact aside.
>>48202681I’ve said it before, she may be an autistic monster girl, but you won’t have dull moments with her.
>>48173617>Yukari is a lot of things, but drugging innocent men is something that disgusts even her. Only desperate girls with creepy eyes would need to resort to that.Is this a jab at her old friend from long-time-forward?
>>48202493I know someone whose cookies are perfect and elegant!
>>48189364It would probably be really rare to get a genuine smile out of her vs the sly, catty grin she usually has
>>48203007Perish the thought.Do you really believe a great and powerful and youthful youkai such as Yukari Yakumo would do such a petty thing?She's obviously just speaking in generalities. You know how those weird-eyed girls are.
Anon, it's time again for Yukarin to continue her lectures on all her favorite engines from The Railway Series and how they were depicted in its various adaptations.
>>48203059Very rare indeed, which begs the question: As she's someone quite experienced in life and likely not prone to happy surprises, what would you even have to do to elicit a genuine smile from Yukari?
Show me her bra collection.
>>48208771cant we talk of some more cool train series, like maitetsu?
>>48211981
>>48212074I don't know about smiling, anon... She certainty seems flustered but how do we accomplish complete Yukari happiness?
>>48213945Kissu~
>>48217630This Yukari is exclusively into girls
>>48211981Listen with genuine interest & enthusiasm while she talks about topics such as >>48208771 at great length, making sure to retain as much as I can while occasionally bringing up points or subjects from conversations prior so she knows I really have been caring all this time. Laugh at her funny little remarks every so often too.Then I'd treat her to a specially prepared cravings dinner of my own making as we enjoy the meal tenderly by the fireplace!Then she'd take me back to her room an
>>48223561See? That's why you need to be careful around Yakumo Yukari. The Anon above just expressed some willingness to be genuinely nice and he was immediately gapped in the middle of typing.Her thirst for human interaction is far too great for anyone's wellbeing. In fact, I
>>48223561>>48224873Oh no, should we try to find these two? Yukari just straight up took them without even having met with them but simply because they wouldn’t tell her to “go away” or “shower smelly hag” and such. I’m a bit jealous.
>>48223561>Then she'd take me back to her room an...let you tuck her in and turn on the night light so that she can get a good night's sleep?
>>48223561>>48224873Yukari 'eats' anons on an hourly basis.What a whore! No wonder she can't get a boyfriend, nobody wants the village bike.
>>48225631>>48227551Well, I (>>48224873) have returned. I am sadly under explicit gag order and can't tell much. However, it wasn't as bad as I thought it will be. The other Anon is not coming back, I am afraid. He went to happier place...
Today i dreamed that i was having sex with BBW Yukari and i couldn't get her off me because she was too heavy
>>48234519Nooo! It should have been me!
>>48234519How heavy exactly?
>>48230736A shame about that other guy and the gag order. But hypothetically, what would happen if you broke it? The people and I demand to know what Yukari did to you during your forced captivity!
>>48230736I think I would probably cry if Yukari gave me a warm hug
>>48235463Very heavy. I remember that in the dream she didn't last even a minute before finishing, i asked her for more sex but she wanted to sleep instead. But instead of sleeping she started kissing me, i tried to get her off me but she was too heavy, i felt her entire weight pushing against my torso even though she was sitting on my hips.
>>48237955>i felt her entire weight pushing against my torso even though she was sitting on my hipsThe yukariccubus is real.
>>48234519That’s hot
>>48237955Dainty, cute foot
>>48238067Lesbians
The funny thing about a plump Yukari is that she could effortlessly will away any bodily trait she determines to be a blemish so you, of course, have to question if having a fuller figure is how she wants to be perceived or if she's too listless to use her powers on herself.Either way, you can't help but love her the same.
>>48244391>have to question if having a fuller figure is how she wants to be perceived or if she's too listless to use her powers on herself.maybe she subconsciously sees herself as plump so even if she uses her power to make herself slim it wouldn't keep
>>48239876Yukari-sama's agressive, yet soft and gentle footjob!! Getting kissed on the neck from behind, getting my hair and head petted and being called a good boy while getting my dick sandwiched between her soft feet, feeling like two pillows rubbing against my sensible glans without mercy!!
>>48245286One word for this sweet sage: N E E D.
>>48245286Holy fuck
Fatty lmao
>>48244987No small part thanks to her fox reminding her the exact amount of calories she's taking in and giving her a complex about it.
Ok niggers the propaganda worked and now I cant help but cum to the old hag on a regular basis.Now what.
>>48249201Cum harderCum stronger
>>48249201Despair
>>48122469had a dream i was a border crossing guard into gensokyo and i let yukari and chen through. what does this mean?
>>48249201>>48249679She'll come for you soon.
>>48250186I wish she'd come for me.
>>48244987>Have near infinite reign over physical space and can manipulate forms with just a thought>But any attempts at remolding yourself are reversed by your own deep rooted self-esteem complexes>Meaning you have complete dominion over all the world except yourselfWith a situation like that, she seems to be in dire need of correction through intense sessions of hand-holding, positive, self-affirming headpats, and convincing her she's fine as she is.
>>48250186well, if that's what's gonna happen, then i better prepare. does she like wine? chocolate?i'm just scared she'll eat me right off the bat, i'm hoping if i bring her something she'll like me or at least let me run away
>>48255916>wineTry ούζο, Guinness and sake first.
Yukari Yakumo fighting style: https://youtu.be/gDQltEznD9Q
>>48256004i suppose you're right, i thought she might have somewhat western tastes. you know, given the blonde hair, the royal purple dress... her curvy figure...
>>48256888Rum or Whiskey cocktails if you want to give her something with some sweetness other than wine thats still western. Hell, try white claws, I think she would like them
>>48255916Laughing my ass off rn at the imagery of Yukari coming to abduct and/or kill this Anon at his house and instead finding a candlelit date night with expensive sake and chocalates.
>>48263068"W-well since you're so insistent I'll take it!"
>>48176486Ran would become the daughter in law and Chen would be the granddaughter in law for sure
>>48263217She would pop a massive boner seeing all that.