Do mens instinctual desire to protect women become evoked with trans women, or is that reserved for cis women?
>>35540587I was helping my friend move house and his dad wouldn't let me lift heavy stuff, does that count?
>>35540597kinda, but not quite what im looking for. things like making sure she doesn't walk alone at night, caring very much about her wellbeing, willing to stop someone trying to hurt you, that sorta thing.there was a woman for example who was being driven to the ER by a male friend of hers. she said she was trans cause she was trying to make sure the doctors had all of the medically necessary info in case if she passed out. the friend stopped the car, and kicked her out and drove awayin my experience, i dont seem to evoke mens desire to protect even though the ones who dont know im trans do things like not let me lift heavy stuff and hold the door open for me
>>35540587If you look feminine, yeah of course
>>35540611nta but my bf wont let me walk home from work alone usually if its dark out but thats different ig since he gets sex from me. he also gets mad when i hurt myself cause im clumsy. im never really expected to do any manual labour though by anyone and i definitely get more like emotional understanding from people i think. but it is what it is we arent actually women and wont ever get that experience fully so who cares>the friend stopped the car, and kicked her out and drove awaythat is disgusting i hope that friend dies painfully
>>35540657that makes me wonder if me not evoking it from my bf is because im ugly, or if it's because im trans. i wont get into the nitty gritty details, but more or less he showed he doesn't care about protecting me physically. we met when i wasn't passing yet, and him showing he doesn't care happened when I wasn't passing. i pass now about a year after that, but it makes me hesitant that i evoke it from him, despite his assurances.
>>35540611You know men only do those things if they want to bang the woman right
>>35540674that seems to be the case but i want to verify experiences from other trans people. i was curious and looked at the foreveralonewomen subreddit and cis women there talk a lot about how men dont care about their safety or protecting them at all
>>35540669if he is your boyfriend and not protecting you, especially if you are passing, he is a freak
>>35540669does he do stuff like that for other women? how do you know he doesnt care about protecting you physically? maybe he just isnt the type of guy to do those things ik some that dont for their female family even and theyre overall pathetic usually
>>35540682Yeah well it is the case. Just another global psyop by and for attractive women that the world is sunshine and rainbows and strangers help you out of the goodness of their hearts.
>>35540587Mine is, especially if you're smaller and weaker than me.
>>35540611On reflection yeah, I experience this, but like other people say mainly because they want to bang me
>>35540587Do you prefer part 1 or part 2 nona
>>35540587yes lol, my self proclaimed conservative coworker last time we had to go wine tasting paid for my lunch and happily drove me around to everywhere i wanted to go and even paid for candy
>>35540683im considering breaking up with him over it, but i wanted to see if the same happened to other cis women>>35540692>does he do stuff like that for other women?he doesn't know many other women, but he does seem to care about protecting his mom.>how do you know he doesnt care about protecting you physically? maybe he just isnt the type of guy to do those things ik some that dont for their female family even and theyre overall pathetic usuallytldr, i had a previously physically abusive relationship to the point of almost killing me. when my bf found out, he kept asking what i did to provoke the person, that i must have been at fault somehow, etc. he would apologize, say he didn't mean it, then the next time he got angry, would say the same things and use it against me. this happened for months until around the time i started passing. for the record i didn't provoke it, my ex hurt me when i would try to break up with them or when they were having a ptsd episode.my boyfriend says he regrets it heavily and feels extremely guilty about it, but it's hard to shake the feeling he doesn't care about my safety
>>35540587mine is evoked by boys.
>>35540716to other trans women*whoops
>>35540611>making sure she doesn't walk alone at nightIn my experience guys do it to everyone, including each other.
>>35540716>he kept asking what i did to provoke the person, that i must have been at fault somehowleave him now lmao he is not worth it at all if hes said shit like that. find a nice guy who cares for u gl anon.
>>35540716Okay he is a freak, imo you should definitively break up in my opinion. His first reaction being disbelieving his girlfriend is insane.
>>35540723Men definitively do not protect other men from going alone at night lol
>>35540587Not like, "protect", but definitely defer from male role responsibilities.
>>35540587My male friends got super pissed and threatened to beat a guy up when I got groped by a gay guy early in my transition. Most of my male friends seem to have a desire to protect me and even take care of me to some extent, which is weird. Most of them knew me pre transition but are trans friendly. Probably doing it for woke points but w/e
>>35540812protecc da bussy!!
>>35540716Also your bf is a freak, you could probably do a lot betterMy boyfriend is very protective of me and got incredibly upset about my past abusive relationships
>>35540845This, if she is passing as she says, she can definitively get someone nicer
>>35540723>>35540728>>35540845>>35541158im afraid i wont be able to, and then i wont have my current bf or a man who desires to protect me. ive never had anyone in my life act like my safety is important before or bother to protect me, whether it's my family or my boyfriend, it doesn't seem to matter. even people early in their transition like >>35540812 can seem to receive it.men have been incredibly nice and helpful towards me since i started passing, but they don't know im trans. what if it's something fundamental about me that makes people not care?
As an ftm I only have an instinctual desire to molest transwoman
>>35540587i doubt it since i was out with some progressive friends once and some dude grabbed me and threatened me in front of them and they just stood and watched and then pretended like nothing happened after. they are more than happy to make jokes about me making a good trap if they put a bag over my head and other stuff though!! learned my lesson and now i never leave my room or talk to anyone anymore and now my head spins when i stand up and my heart and head pounds when just being around other people! cant even walk normally since i just sleep all day now. i also learned recently i dont smell if i go a week without showering, i just get a slightly acidic and fruity scent in my arm pits and pubic area.t. never felt protected or safe in his entire life moder
>>35541172Do you date your boyfriend because he is your boyfriend / you have one, or because you like him as person enough? As it stands it seems to me you might not get a bf who will protect you immediately, but are denying yourself the possibility of ever getting one by staying with a shitty guy.
>>35540587I would protect a weaker person, regardless of their sex.
>>35541233This is sad, and your friends sound weak and without value.
>>35540587no, because those instincts exist for the purpose of protecting the means of reproduction, and trannies are wombless so those feelings are not evoked :(
>>35541233>make jokes about me making a good trap if they put a bag over my headwow i literally had this happen to me like a year ago and now i have 0 friends and rot all day as well. at least im not alone
>>35541233im sorry anon, it hurts terribly inside knowing no one cares or would do anything>>35541239we are compatible outside of this i feel. similar interests, no interest in my genitals that i feel dysphoric about, sex is good, etc. its (mostly) the issues with protection, i fear that ill be sexually or physically assaulted and he'll ask me what i did to provoke them. i want to feel safe around my boyfriend, i feel like that's a major reason women in general date men
>>35540587>>35540646>If you look feminine, yeah of courseI think it's this, I boymode and I'm closeted but I am looking more and more feminine and people are being nicer to me and doing things for me like men have been going out of their way to do stuff for me a few times. It's so weird seeing the way that people act towards me change
>>35541266If you do not feel safe around him that is a major, major issue. And him victim-blaming is unbecoming of a boyfriend too. Have you raised these issues with him recently?
>>35541172If you pass you probably won’t have a hard time finding a better bf. Genuine, caring and protective guys aren’t impossible to come by and your boyfriend kinda seems like a scum bag. Or you could give up and settle for a guy who doesn’t care that you’ve been abused
>>35541271he's apologized for it extensively and the blaming stopped after i started passing, i feel i would just be putting him through the wringer for no reason at this point if i talked about it again. he knows how bad it makes me feel, and swears he'd protect me, but then says things like he thinks it's fine for me to walk to the gym in the middle of the night. i dont know what to think
Trans women activate a deep desire to protect and cherish. I am going to guess its because 99% of trans women have some sort of fucked up trauma that makes me want to help and nurture. Sorry, too honnish girls just don't activate the same feelings
>>35541283I feel like him only caring about you after you started passing is a red flag for his character
>>35541291This. Broken bird syndrome usually comes with very strong protective feelings, and transwomen are on balance pretty likely to trigger that.
>>35541250idk they arent bad people by any means they are all very smart and have social lives and good jobs. I feel like I'm the weak one without value if we're being honest lol.>>35541260I bet I've rotted more than you have!! I sometimes pee in bottles because i dont have the will to leave my room a lot and cant hold it in until late at night when my family are asleep! >:]
>>35541283Does your boyfriend not realize how weak/vulnerable you are, or does he think you’re not in danger of being assaulted because you are trans?
>>35541280>>35541294im going to go to bed for the night as it's 5AM here, thank you both for talking to me about this and giving me perspective on things.
>>35541291Broken Bird Syndrome single-handedly supplying trannies with boyfriends
>>35541306Well, I disagree. I think if someone acts progressive and says all the "right" things, but then does nothing when someone gets grabbed and threatened then they're weak people. Talk is cheap.
>>35541306damn yeano i havent done that but i have an en suite bathroom so i can literally just not leave my room for days till i get hungry
>>35541317I suppose so idk I just dont really expect much of anyone, I assume the worst. They could have actively made jokes about the it but they just like tuned it out and moved on. They could also have just straight up said im irredeemable but at least to them a bag on my head is enough lol.>>35541327you lucky bitch. i bet the bag your friends put on your head was made from the finest silk, too
>>35541357if i was lucky i wouldnt be in this situation >.>.
>>35541412i was joking anon!! >:[
>>35541357You having low self worth doesn't make it okay for your friends to treat you like that. You deserve to be defended, Anonette. Regardless of your self esteem. Their failure to do so is a reflection of their poor character, not your value.
>>35541193what...
>>35541193you little devils always taking advantage of trans girls
