Outdoorsy Editionprevious: >>36398473Goal of the thread: Go out for a walk, or try to get any other form of small exercise (walking stairs for 5 mins for example)Daily goals can be repeated. Remember to keep score, it can only go up!>What is this thread for?Getting better is hard, and sucks. A lot. It does not get easier doing it alone.Share resources and experiences with combating depression, anxiety, personal issues, achieving or maintaining a healthy weight, etc.>Why is this thread /lgbt/?Struggles with mental and physical health are an indisputable part of /lgbt/ life, be it from dysphoria, social pressure, heartbreak, or just unfortunate lifestyle choices.>Notes to consider:Please be civil. Shame is your greatest enemy in fighting urges of self abuse (be it sh, drugs, or just self deprecation). Relapsing into bad and unhealthy habits is to be expected, the goal is to increase the average amount of time it takes between relapses. Any improvement is a victory no matter how small. Your worth and right to get better are non-negotiable. And most importantly:WE ARE NOT THERAPISTS, WE DON'T REPLACE MEDICATION>Note on adviceGeneric advice won't necessarily help you in particular, but for those it does it is an essential foundation to build future progress on, not a miracle cure. Do not underestimate the effects subtle changes to your lifestyle can have. Try first, keep us posted on your progress, build from there.We are *always* short on self help resources, so if anything was useful to you, let us know!Since the OP is getting too long I moved all resources into their own post, see below!## RESOURCE LINKS:Resource link paste: https://sntry.cc/sig-resources-2024-04General advice from Anons: https://sntry.cc/sig-tips-2024-04Posts from other sites (markdown format): https://sntry.cc/sig-posts-2024-04
Apart from the GOTT, here are a few things you can do _today_ to make your life a little better. Keep a diary and write down every success. Some you may do as often as you please, but write down each one individually! You deserve it! Do not feel pressured to do all, but feel free to select one or two!- prepare 1 load of laundry- do 1 load of laundry- read one page of a book or manga you have been putting off- cook yourself a meal, or try learn to make a simple dish- eat a meal- pick up items on the floor for 5 minutes- make your bed- if you have a bad habit, try making it more inconvenient (putting things in hard to reach places for example)- do the dishes for 3 minutes- write down one thing you are grateful for (from abstract things to something like a cute image you saw)- Clean up 1m^2 of your floor (~40x40 in)- Open your window for 10-20 minutes- try to exercise for 5 min (walk outdoors, walking stairs, whatever you wish)- take out the trash- drink a glass of water- put one item of trash in the bin- reach out to an online contact- BONUS: Repeat a goal to hit a milestone (1 book chapter rather than a page, the laundry pile, the floor of one room, etc)
Please make sure to check the last thread for responses! I had to axe it a little early.If I missed something, do ping me!Goodnight.
I walk like... every three days... thats ok...>>36585521how are you holding up with ur travelling . . . and conferences...>>36585401driving is scary because i have to pass the driving test with minimal driving experience. i don't have a car to practice driving in, and don't know anyone who can help.
>>36585401>Diatomaceous earth would murder all bugs indiscriminately by basically covering them in microscopic papercuts, bleeding them out. I'm well aware of the miraculous functions of those minuscule fossils, but it's not particularly possible to apply said substance to the underside of foliage. >What techniques have you tried last time?Predominantly neem oil solution, Bacillus thuringiensis-laden water, and manual introduction of spiders and predatory mites found on nearby trees. My last resort shall be the shearing and disposal of all affected leaves on salvageable plants.
copy pasted bc i didn't realize the thread got killed>>36585092i suppose, it's been pretty tough lately, i don't want to go into specifics but it's been really wearing down my self-esteem and sense of value/worth. been feeling very much like i'm not wanted around, or at the very least that i'm out of place in most social groups i try to participate in. we can work on the physical stuff eventually i'm still sorting through some feelings about my body and its worth, though i have an appointment with my doctor in about a month
good night
>>36587326>not particularly possible to apply said substance to the underside of foliageoh so that's probably another reason many live on the underside
I have absolutely nothing to live for and no actual support in my life these days. I want to keep living but I keep stumbling and fucking up or relapsing with self harm or just wind up drinking myself to sleep. Hopefully I just wind up in an accident or someone commits an act of violence against me soon
>>36589009I hope your situation improves and that you are safe and that there are no accidents or acts of violence
>>36589009good on you for speaking up, anon.can you tell us more about your circumstances? what is standing in your way?
sometimes life stomps you out and its not really your fault you been put in this situation, it is unfair for others to ask you to keep going after everything and I think that's okay, giving up is okay when the pain is unbearable.tt: Trans girl who's been raped and hellishly abused from a young age. Every year men drive the feeling that they are monstrous or simply insensitive and dealing with emotions for these people is just not worth it.Me and a similarly destroyed trans girl have decided to go together, we will have enough coke so it doesn't hurt too much, I hope.I wish the best for those who stay.
>>36592772I genuinely hope you don't, anon.. a close friend of mine was assaulted recently, and I am a moid, and.. I am trying my damndest to help her. You deserve help and support, too, and it is awful you did not receive any yet. Maybe I am selfish in saying all that because your story hits close to home, and letting people like you go would have meant never having met some dear friends of mine. But I can imagine you also just thinking "well, lucky them to have found someone not being a piece of shit.". At the same time, if you have found others willing to end it, you would also have people who could make it and protect one another together.. maybe..?
>>36592804Its by letting people try that they hurt you, dogs can't bite from a distance. And this girl is hopeless just like me although by other issues and offenders, it's not within my rights to make her stay, plus I'm straight as fuck I hate feminity, I could never work like that.I'm not here to beg for my life, in a way it's been taken from me already, I just need to finish the job myself.
>>36593117Why do you decide to come here and post about it and deliberately pick your favorite toe hoe to post how you're going to kill yourself and another human then
>>36593117Hmm... do you think I would hurt my friend?
>>36593462I'm not killing anyone but myself, that girl was the one who invited me to begin with, asshole. Endless positivism without seeing the other end of the spectrum, that giving up is fine is just as toxic
>>36593507Suicide pacts like this in my experience end one of three ways.1. Neither of you die and you endlessly feed of each other's suffering until one of you breaks free and leaves the other.2. You both die and thats the end of it. 3. Only one of you dies and the other has to watch and live with it forever. This is by far the worst outcome and fucks you up really badly. Wouldn't recommend it.
>>36593507nta, I 100% agree that sig is not a place for mandatory positivity, OP stressed this ad nauseam. but I think it is fair to assume you are okay with people trying their darndest to lift you up, even if they can't fully relate.
>>36593507I only asked a question "to see the other end of the spectrum"... What do you mean asshole positivism? No rudeness no capybara. What do you gain from venting here if you have already decided to end your life, if this is not a call for help?
Take a chill pill
>>36595176that's an adorable fox
>>36585521Gonna work out today and go to a party to socialize after. Yesterday went to a convention and met a bunch of people. Trying my best to get out of my shell. Been consistent with eating healthier :D Next step is sleep maybe? Hopefully?
I will be picking up my old geocaching hobby as an excuse to get out of the house today. Hold me to it please.
>>36595277go for it, anon!
>>36585521Proposal to add https://archived.moe/lgbt/search/subject/self%20improvement%20general/type/op/ to the OP, what do you think?
im so tired i just got back from dnd and the bar and its 1am so im really struggling to tell a full tale and ask for advice but i can elaborate on details if its needed later - i really really like these 2 new friends i made and i would love to hang out with them more. they seem to like me a lot too, they are also very close and do stuff together all the time and i dont want to intrude of course. is there any way i can approach it without feeling too weird or pushy? i think the tried and true is just inviting them to something but im nervous!
I dont know why but it gets hard brushing my teeth like at times I feel like at times I dont brush them because the taste of at times feels too much for me and other times I feel it will get in the way for eating. Other than that I have to get ready for college fall semester is approaching and im really hoping i get grant money dont have much money :/
Bump.
I'm not a regular on this thread but I like seeing it, I'm glad there is a thread like this even on this awful board.I have been looking for a job constantly applying to places for about two months and still nothing despite all the interviews I've landed :( I feel like a huge loser but I'm trying to stay positive. I've been going to the pool lately and it really makes the rest of the day feel great.
How do I stop feeling like there's a burning coal in my chest from anxiety all day?
>>36599753desu more than anything you just learn to handle it better, it takes time, but it gets easier not because it's easier, but because you know how to deal with it
>>36600839>>36599753true, but a. noticing specific methods that can help you set it aside when you need to do something or generally cool it off a bit is where some of that progress will lie, and b. there are probably a lot of things - thoughts, beliefs, responsibilities, behaviour patterns - fueling that anxiety and it can be chipped away a lot over time
>>36600839also meditation box breathing etc, are useful tools that can make it easier to do the main work of processing that stuff, changing what can be changed and accepting that which can't be changed yet
I exercised even though I didn't feel like it. Afterwards, I felt amazing. GOTT accomplished.
I feel so lonely and it seems like the world around me is only getting worseDw ill be ok in the long runI only hope the best for those in need.
This post is just a conversation starter, a shower thought type of thing, I am trying to find something worthwhile in it but can't on my own. People often say that giving up on life is easy. I think it rarely is something people actually believe in the sense they came to the conclusion after thinking long and hard about it. They just want to devalue it as a concept, in a misguided attempt to lift up the notion of staying alive by pushing "the competition" down. In reality, unaliving is goddamn hard, and giving up is painful. People that do are scared, desperate, or feel cornered, like there is no other option. But oftentimes, trying to connect with them in a way that feels sincere in the moment only rekindles bitter feelings. It is so hard to make someone understand, even for those that were in that position.
>>36599619You can do it!!! I’m in the same position, just keep trying. We’ll get there soon!! :) >>36602525GOOD JOB ANON!!! I’m proud of you, keep up the good work. >>36602681I hope for the best for you, anon
>>36602846I agree with you. I’ve failed a few suicide attempts/preparations, and each time it got harder, scarier and more painful. The final one was the most afraid of anything I’ve been in my entire life, and I got back down off the roof. I just thought to myself “I don’t care what happens to me, I don’t wanna die anymore” I had been chronically suicidal since 11 and I’d heard “giving up is easy and selfish” more times than I can count. There was no amount of someone attempting to genuinely connect with me that wouldn’t have felt bitter and forced. How can I, as a chronically suicidal person, seriously engage with you without seeming unhinged and a danger? How could I be seen as a person? I’m really glad it’s over. Stuff gets better for some people, it did for me. It doesn’t for everyone though, and that hurts to think about.
I relapsed againTwice I what 1 week?AwfulSeems like at my worst it strikes
>decided not to let my anxiety and doom spiraling make me self sabotage my friendships>reach out after a breakdown >They understood and am hanging out with some friends today Very nice. Love my fellow mental invalids being understanding.
>>36604456Good job anon! Hope you have fun
I guess I really don’t belong anywhereNobody actually cares or rather they do as much as their pity allows. Abd I dint need people like that in my life.Worst feeling is knowing I can never make friends or relationships again because I am a tranny abd even other trannies don’t like me because I’m fake and boring.I do nothing all day and then come here to complain enjoy the complain hope everyone knows it.I guess this is my life now. There is nothing to be done but wait for time to pass.
>>36605789What a boring post
>>36605844your FACE is boring
>>36606077Fuck you
OP here, my first day of actual rest in a good while. Conference season is over, no more business trips. I will take a vacation soon enough.>>36585977You are doing great, anon. I am proud of you. As for the driving.. I have a silly question, because I never asked if possibly friends of your family or acquaintances may work. I remember I asked if you could try with your family but that was not an option for reasons I forgot.>>36587326> but it's not particularly possible to apply said substance to the underside of foliage. ah crap, yeah, top side could be sprinkled but underside won't work. Are there maybe other gardening enthusiasts in your general area who might also face yearly mite wars? Have you ever tried ordering predator species online en masse? A whole box of them might be more effective.>>36587474I'm glad you have an appointment soon. Things are difficult and I am sorry you are struggling. I get you don't wanna get into it or risk reliving it here. It limits my ability to respond to it meaningfully sadly, but I would like to hear what you would say is meaningful to you. Some people want to make others happy, or "be useful". Others wanna "succeed". You know, it's essentially a question of what is the most compelling thing that you find would add value to your existence.>>36589009I am sorry to hear, anon. Especially with no support network your options are limited. The most important thing to try would be to get you among supportive people. Support groups and such would be a quick measure, but those don't grow on trees either. I should probably ask first what you have tried.>>36592772>>36593117I hope you don't end up doing it, anon. I am sorry you feel everyone is out to hurt you. I would like to hear more about your friend. I think you would probably have the strength to keep going if it meant she did too?>>36595215You are doing wonderfully, then! Sleep is on my schedule, too.
>>36596297Not the worst idea to add it, I think.>>36595277Pinging (You) for an update. >>36597750Your plan is brilliant already, you are nervous because it is new. Exchanging contacts for it and just pinging from time to time also helps. Some people suck at texting or are rarely online though, so meetups are a very reliable way to go. Personally, I like to cook with people and share a dinner.>>36598007Hmm, sensory issues? I think I recall some people on the spectrum who did not vibe with the mint flavor... I would try out different things and look into it. > I feel it will get in the way for eating.could you give some context for that?>and im really hoping i get grant money dont have much money :/I do wish you all the best for it, funding is always a pain, as a postdoc I always have to keep it in mind, too.>>36599619It is really fucking hard, and the job market is a mess. There is only so much one can do, a lot is trial and error. Sometimes you can get a competitive edge out of being particularly mobile, or knowing people from the particular field, someone who can look over your CV and make informed suggestions. But most of all.. in a crowded job market with lotsa businesses struggling you must remember you are not alone in all this. You are not a failure. You have worth.>>36602525AWESOME, anon!! Proud of you. And yes, the reason I have it in the rotation is exactly because it is free endorphins.>>36602681It is so sweet of you, anon. Your kindness is appreciated, and it makes you a force of good. We can only try to make things better together.>>36603011> How can I, as a chronically suicidal person, seriously engage with you without seeming unhinged and a danger?been thinking about this. It is so hard to make someone believe that you see then as a person that is hurt, not someone to be pitied, or a threat. I feel there is this communicative barrier that needs tearing down there. There is no set of magic words that work on everyone, though..
>>36603556Hmm.. it is insidious. There are things you can do for prophylaxis, depending on the kind. If it is sh, one thing would be to get a lock box. You can make things harder to access. You can look into grounding techniques and such. A lot of things that are known to work relate to stalling, distraction, or change of scenery. More fundamentally we can talk about what got you down.>>36604456I am happy for you, anon. Things are hard, and these calls are difficult to make. I am glad you are blessed with a good friend.>>36605789It will get a lot easier, with time. I know you struggle with babytran issues, we both know, but you are NOT as alone as you think.
>>36607951grats on the end of conference season and i'm glad you're going to get to rest some now, a well earned vacation sounds lovely OP>what you would say is meaningful to youi'm kind of a split between the examples, i want to help people and i try every day to do what i can to spread some love/kindness/happiness to others, that's probably the thing that tends to drive me most, despite feeling generally out of place and like my presence is generally unwanted. but what i want to do outside of that is just create things, i'm an artist, i love to cook, i've at least dabbled in a fair few different modes of creating tangible things (from art to building functional things like furniture) and i have an artsy career path that i'm doing my best to realize. so idk, they're both equally important to me desu
>>36595277>geocachingQrd?
BUMP DUTY !!!
how does one actually go about starting therapy? honestly i don't think it'll be helpful but people keep bugging me about it.i just had an irl steven moment. complete with my situationship being there. that was worse than any of my problems and i mainly want to avoid any interaction like that again
>>36607951>Have you ever tried ordering predator species online en masse?Not yet.
Anon from last (?) thread who talked about wanting to withdraw from society and become a Buddhist nun.I think I see a way forward! Well, sort of. I plan to finish getting my library degree, double down on studying Chinese, Japanese, and Sanskrit, and I might actually seek ordination in a school that accepts trans monastics. They exist in Japan and in the West. Continuing my gym routine, trying to be in control of my diet in healthy ways (hard as fuck), and basic self care because I accepted that I can't manage a 7 step skincare routine every day.>>36610557PsychToday has a directory for finding therapists in the US.
Bump page 10
Bump
I hate being sick...
Friends, reppers, countrymen, lend me your ears.I am awaiting some email correspondence from my friendly neighborhood lawyer to finish sorting out court documents. I am finally getting my name changed and it's not going to bankrupt me. I'm all fired up.
