Im 2 years HRT, post FFS, and have just finally become comfortable enough with myself to start dating cis-guys. Overall, I've been enjoying the attention and the dates themselves but it seems like every guy I go on a date with wants to fuck me the first time and is (decently) aggressive about it. I'm not used to getting attention from straight acting men like this, and I want them to like me, so I let them do whatever they want. I kinda enjoy it too sometimes but the pattern has left me feeling like I'm being used. This seems like a phase that cis-girls figured out in their late teens and I just feel really shitty figuring this out as a mid twenties transgirl. I just got fucked after a date, and it was nice, but now I feel ashamed and like crying This may sound like I'm asking how not to be a whore, but I guess how have you developed the self-worth as a woman not to be?
>>37048419have you tried just... not having sex with them? like just don't its not that hard
>>37048419i'm a virgin.i just think about how happy i imagine my future forever partner would be when i tell them that i saved myself for them, and it gives me the will to say no.also, having crippling genital dysphoria "helps" a lot with not having sex. the amount of trust it would take to let someone even see me naked (much less touch) is something that would have to be built up over months at least.
>>37048440I guess I've just internalized the message that men want us only for sex and I feel like if I don't have sex with them then they won't want to be with me at all
>>37048459I respect that and Im sorry you have such bad dysphoria surrounding that but this sounds like being on the opposite end of the spectrum. I just want to be like a "normal" woman. I want to find a balance between your experience and mine
>>37048459>i just think about how happy i imagine my future forever partner would be when i tell them that i saved myself for them,almost everyone but a very specific subset of cishet men would see this as anything but a red flag.
>>37048473if they are only with you for sex then you shouldn't even bother giving them yr attention, you're worth more than that. Saying no doesn't make you a bad person and anyone who would lose interest because you don't fuck on the first date isn't someone you'd ever want to be with. Loneliness is really, really terrible but that hole in your heart can't be filled by someone who's only interested in the hole they can use. you'll find your one eventually, anonette
>>37048525assuming you meant "would see this as a red flag", why?i just want my first time to be with someone i really trust and see myself being with for a long time. a stable, loving relationship is my prerequisite for having sex with me, i just am not interested in casual sex. is that really that weird? it's not like i want to wait for marriage or anything like that. and i like the idea of someone being excited to take my first time. it's so intimate.
>>37048459I would want to marry youDont listen to the jealous purityhons
>>37048565>>i just want my first time to be with someone i really trust and see myself being with for a long time.lol. your 'first time' will be a night of fingering and then you go to sleep, and if you skip that step, it will be your boyfriend putting it in and hurting you, and you not feeling up to it, and going to sleep. unless u get SRS it's really not so special lolol. even then. still the same way
>>37048473so deinternalise it. damn. BAD men only want you for sex. GOOD men want you for sex at the pace you want to take it
>>37050923That's not the best way to go about it. The correct way is to spend a year training your ass with sex toys, learning how to be clean, learning how to orgasm down there, or with your neopussy if you have one. The once you're ready you start letting men play with it.
>>37048419>2 years hrtJust be a whore lil babytranny its fun
>>37050949>The correct way is to spend a year training your ass with sex toys,??? that's fucking weird, lol. agp as fuck>learning how to be cleanit's not rocket science? eat enough fibre, time your bowel movements, and take 5 min giving a light rinse with a bulb?>learning how to orgasm down thereum. no. im not going to autistically spend my valuable time learning how to 'orgasm down there', when it's literally intuitive>The once you're ready you start letting men play with it.retarded three times over. im just going to stay letting men i trust explore my body, i dont have much interest in this form unlike you apparently
>>37050962This is a sex goddess btw she fucks good
>>37049977thankyou <3>>37050923>lol. your 'first time' will be a night of fingering and then you go to sleep, and if you skip that step...who said anything about "skipping that step"??? what are you talking about? penetrative sex would not be the first sexually intimate thing i'd be planning on ever doing with my future partner, why would you assume that? literally all i want is to be in a committed relationship before having sex with someone. im not interested in one night stands, i'm not interested in friend with benefits, i'm interested in loving sex with someone i trust that makes me feel safe and secure. wtf is so weird about that? when i meet that person, of course we'll go at our own pace.