anons i need some advicei'm 18, mtf (?), been on hormones for like just over 3 monthsi've always had trans thoughts and have always been super jealous of cute girls, especially my trans friend, and one time on a mushroom trip i realized that that jealousy was probably because I'M trans.so then a few months after that i went DIY without anyone else's knowledge, boymoded this whole time, and eventually told a few friends (only two about actually being on hormones).i planned to boymode for as long as i could, until i move out and go to uni, don't want my fucking bigoted flat-earther family knowing about me being on hrt.i just don't fucking know anymore, i don't want to be some kind of freak, i just want to feel normal. sometimes i feel comfortable in being trans and the changes, and other times (like now) i think "god this is such a big thing what the fuck am i doing".i get really great grades, make programs/games in rust, as well as old school mod-tracker music, but i know i'll never be enough because my fucking ribcage and jawline mean i won't properly pass. why can't i just be normal?i feel like right now i can strike up a conversation with anybody, and i hate the fact that me being trans means i'll probably lose that ability, unless i get my voice perfect, as well as pass, which i know probably won't happenanother thing is that currently i quite enjoy boymoding, it appeases the trans in me as changes are happening to my body, but i've still got all the privelege and safety and stuff of being a man.i don't want to be a stereotypical lame girl, i'm a nerd and not some bimbo, i think i'm really internally transphobic and sexist which doesn't helpi might just rep, lift weights and get a girlfriend or some shit. i feel that i could survive and not be in too much mental anguish, i don't really have bad dysphoria (or maybe i don't realise it) but i'll always be thinking of the "what if" for both sides of the coin.i just don't know what to do anons
Everyone starts with something, please don't rep if you don't wanna end up john50
>>37320174why not work on killing the misogynistic moid living rent free in your head and keep taking your meds instead of repping. no matter how masculine u think u look now it will be 1000x worse if you rep to 25, or 30, or 50. if your anxious about lack of changes 3 months hrt is like basically nothing i really think u should stick it out
>>37320242>>37320208thanks both of youi think i'd probably end up john50ing anyway if i rep now, i just thought i might as well being a man while i cani mean god, you can just talk to anyone, walk around at night safely, i feel like people would respect me way less if i trooned out, i've already built up a lovely and large (yet somewhat shallow) social life, i play my part and fit in.i also have my close friends who wouldn't care if i was trans, but i dunno, i'm quite outgoing and enjoy that, i feel like i'd lose it
>>37320174>I’m detransitioning>3 months DIYfirst off you never transitioned second off you’re really dumb if you didn’t think about all this before taking hrt.
>>37320174>I enjoy boymodingThen keep at it? You really don’t have to hon out if you don’t want to. Many of us had financial, surgical, or overall life goals we wanted to complete before socially transitioning. For those who can’t pass easily, HRT puts a “pause” on having to worry about further masculinizing until those goals are fulfilled (…but also grow boobs and some other stuff that you can usually hide, just look into the effects and make sure you’re really okay with everything).
>>37320174God, don't be such a retard. You are a tranny, and you can either live as an non-transitioning tranny, living in anguish (It really only gets worse), or a transitioning tranny, making the most of your life. Just take your pills and boymode for like a year or two, it sucks at first but thats what we all went through
What is more important to you? Your gender identity or being loved by a beautiful woman and having a family? If latter, you’re severely lowering your chances. You’re probably high iq and okay looking, you can find a dream girl and have a beautiful exciting life as a man.If imagining yourself as a man, even a happy man with a great wife, is disturbing to you, then you may consider transitioning. Another important thing people do not talk about: Are you attracted to mtfs? Because that will be your dating pool after transitioning
>>37320360Honestly to me this is whats wrong with todays generation of tranners. You should socially transition first. Its good for you. It instills in you a need to stop jackin around and pass. You’ll end up putting in more effort to learn what you need to learn.
>>37320284i did think about it before, i'll admit i've been a little hasty, it's just that it felt so right!only recently have the doubts started becoming this bad>>37320360thanks anon, i plan to! i think i might just bind my boobs when they start to get too big, the only thing i'm upset about is not being able to go outside without my shirt on, or friends seeing my chest. i could just say i have gyno though.>>37320403hah, thanks anon. i think i will. i just hate the idea of regretting it one day and thinking "damn i could've just kept being a cool guy">>37320454well, in an ideal world i'd be happy as a guy and stay that way, but i know my mind will forever be plagued by trans thoughts.imagining myself as an older version of myself, who's a man, is somewhat distressing, but then again i'm just so confusedi like mtfs, as well as guys, i'd be really happy with a chaser if we get along lol
>>37320594Cringe take
>>37320174look >>37320284you havent even detrooned any they're already bedding in the denouncements. good luck, soon-to-be detranny.
>>37320174I think that you can just be a “boy” on hrt who wears girl clothes and voice trains. People get too caught up in labels. This doesn’t have to be a big thing unless you want it to be. HRT’s effects are pretty easily reversible
>>37321478you know what, absolutely correct, i'm really enjoying hrt. i need to start voice training
>>37320660Legit. I bet the only tranners who think you should socially transition first were femboys who could already be mistaken for a girl without even trying.
>>37320174>another thing is that currently i quite enjoy boymoding, it appeases the trans in me as changes are happening to my body, but i've still got all the privelege and safety and stuff of being a man.so keep doing that?you're just scared of the social repercussions of transitioning, which is normalif you want to avoid that the best way is to boymode until you pass. repressing would be a really dumb idea
>>37321623Or gigahons with zero self awareness
guys im so back i'm about to inject my estrogen, life is good again, i'm just gonna boymode until i'm ready, thank you anons <3>>37321735
>>37321698nta, but my plan is just that -- remain socially male and secretly take hrt and practice until passing. I'd like to avoid being a ridiculous looking hon.
