>>37326566
how do you self sabotage?

>>37326566
I have a fat fetish and I hate myself for it. I would feel so guilty if I had a fat partner but I can't help my fetish. I feel even worse because I'm not fat and I don't really want to be either. It basically means that I avoid sex, relationships, and intimacy entirely.

>>37327506
sometimes i just
internally get real conflicted even though i know i wanna lose weight and theres just alotta not great options right next to me and so sometimes even if im not hungry, if im conflicted or like
in that kinda mood ill sometimes just
like eat somethin
or like imagine doing somethin alone those lines and i wish i was joking so badly but im not
ive like gone to the store just to buy heavy cream once...
i feel so fucking awful about stuff like that
i wish i could just like literally lock like the fridge and pantry but i dont live alone and even if i stopped gettin bad stuff my gf (whos underweight ironically enough and trying to get to a more normal weight but also has a thing for fat girls) still would and i dont blame her for that at all
it just i guess also enables me and i feel just real gross about it and everythin really
it just sucks

>>37329350
theres alotta larger ppl out there who im sure would be happy with ya but i guess i know what you mean? or like could imagine
especially like
having to have that conversation
or like the guilt of feeling like being unsure how feeling
it just fucking sucks
idk if thats exactly what you mean but im sorry you have to deal with it
im know theres ppl who are into like
being bigger themselves but its rough
i dont blame you at all for avoiding relationship stuff, thats probably the smarter choice and honestly if i had a redo id let my gf be with someone better than me and normal about things
im sorry that you have to deal with stuff too, even if you arent dealing with weight, you still have alot and i hope it gets better ffor ya

so step one is to stop viewing your body as a moral failing and stop punishing yourself for your weight and try to accept your current position. second, you gotta just start slowly making changes to either add in exercise or to start consuming less calories. if you try to just cold turkey and cut your intake in half, you're going to quickly return to binging and will feel worse and probably gain even more.

or alternatively you get on ozempic or other glp-1, feel sick all the time, but lost the food noise thoughts and have your appetite be normal

>>37330362
i guess i do view it as like
a failing on my part because if i was normal about things my weight wouldnt have ever been a problem or at least would just be a little easier to fix
i can do so well for a few days or longer but if i ever get in that sorta mood or anything its just like
i dont know i dont wanna say i cant help it but
i just wish i could make it go away forever really
my works sorta physical but i do need to excercise more and i try to log my food but whenever somethin happens i just feel so ashamed and disgusted at myself
idk much about ozempic and the likes but idk if its even worth considering
plus i gotta lose like
alotta weight, im like 250 at 5ft7
i think those sorta things are for like
losing a little bit if i recall right
idunno

>>37330629
nah ozempic is for obesity and losing large amounts of weight, especially people who struggle with binge eating.

and i get the feeling, it's so easy to get good for a few days and feel like you've got it for sure this time, and then suddenly that evil deep urge comes back and you have to indulge, but then once you indulge you feel such guilt and shame that you have no choice but to keep indulging, and then suddenly you're +10 lbs from where you started

t. weighed 320lbs at one point

>>37330857
mmaybe its something worth looking into then, i diddnt realize
and yeah it sucks a ton just like feeling good and then like
having to start all over especially cause of brain stuff not helping at all
ii hope it got better ffor you