>>37448382
Old bread: >>37429935

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>>37448382
he is literally me

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>be ugly, awkward manchild
>be shy & nerdy
>think "if i take estrogen i can be a cute girl instead"
>take estrogen
>become more shy
>become more awkward
>still be a man
>end up looking even uglier
>now just an ugly man with disgusting tiny manboobs and a disconcerting lack of facial hair

i hope i die in my sleep. i want a break from being miserable all the time already

>>37448587
wow literally me!

>>37448589
there is no reason to be upset

i regret ever coming out. never come out. i regret ever changing my name. never change your name. i regret ever crossdressing. never crossdress. i have humiliated myself and exposed my autism to everyone. i am never coming back from this. everyone will always know i am a creepy and mentally ill perverted schizophrenic manchild that refuses to grow up

everyone hates me. holy fuck i have brain damage. im retarded. i have no friends. i don't live in the real world. i am literally going insane. i deserve this. my actuons have consequences. i need to detransition. nonbinary isn't real. the woke liberal mind virus is destroying my body and soul. i regret everything

mkultra above

>>37448911
>>37448956
maybe there's like a happy medium? I can't figure it out for myself yet, I'm also insane and alone with the consequences of my actions lol, but just saying maybe a complete detransition won't do you any good

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>>37448587
>be ugly, awkward twink aging into a man
>be shy & nerdy
>think "if i take estrogen i can be a cute girl instead"
>take estrogen
>become more shy
>become more awkward
>still be a man
>end up looking really cute and delicate
>now just a pretty man with soft tiny manboobs and a youthful lack of facial hair

i'll start dieting tomorrow for sure

I girlmoded all day, had fun during. But now at home, showered and alone, I want to kms.

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women at work think I'm just a hyper feminine cute safe guy to be around but in reality I'm a agp transbian who takes advantage of them thinking highly of me for cuddles

going to Canada to get MAID for manmoding

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>>37449352
giwtwm I need human contact and with someone I'm not in emotional turmoil over

>>37449193
you did it

>>37449425
wow haha could you imagine? :(

>>37449450
I did nothing but embarass myself. I feel stupid and ugly.

>>37449599
well I think like anon last thread said what you were doing takes more strength than someone like me has and I hope you at least had some fun

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>>37449599
Awe babe.... don't be so hard on yourself. You did something all of us wish we could do.
Want a ciggy?

>>37449599
yeah the whole gen is fr proud of you

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i just want to feel desired, once

>>37448382
I have a cart battery my grandma gave me, dose that count?

If you work on the river down south in New Orleans you know them boys are high as fuck all the time.

>>37449653
>>37449666
>>37449730
Ty all, it means a lot<3 I think I'm just overwhelmed with the day and need to sleep it off.

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>>37449845
You'll be okay, if you off yourself I will torture you in hell.
Have a cup of coffee.

>>37450113
GIGAmogs me

Applying for at-home ketamine therapy, not because I want to improve my mental health, but because I want legal K shipped to my house.

>>37448382
QOTT My unemployment ran out. should i suck cock so i can buy herbie hancock tickets in toronto next week
If i dont get to hear watermelon man live i will slit my wrists and post it in the chat

>>37448382
based BLPOCNO appreciator

>>37450437
>herbie hancock
are you 80 years old?

>>37450496
No i was born in 2000
What other legends are still alive and touring? cher? i can’t afford a trip to vegas

What would you do if you came across a manmoder who was handling serpents, speaking in tongues, drinking strychnine, and was just generally practicing Pentecostalism?

>>37450652
I would tell him to look into orthodoxy.

>>37450652
I would ask if he could help me attain dark powers

>>37449425
let me know if you find it

>>37450652
date her

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Post your doomer pics and music. Love you fuckers so much.

https://youtu.be/eXkbVtrBrsM?si=KCENV0Z7Bb78UHyQ

they don't think it be like it is, but it do

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RWak0i_iqnM

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https://youtu.be/V8X5DWs_0EE?si=8EhECS2teUwF5Ubp

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https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=R7dkmOMZkdc

I just got an interview
This is my first interview since I started manmoding and I'm terrified

>>37450991
based, good luck and if they give you shit just whip out your dick and give them the estrogenized dongcopter

i need to detransition but im literally more attractive as a man when im on estrogen. what am i supposed to do?

>>37451340
do you want to fuck people as a dude is that why? if so, why not just stay on E and get one of those keyhole ftm top surgeries? those ones apparently are much better than the old butcher style when it comes to being "stealth."

>>37451340
Detransition and you will regret it.
Don't detransition and you will regret it.

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me on the left

>>37451373
why are you people so sexual and disgusting

moffee (male coffee) with moy milk (male onions milk) going in

>>37451452
>drinking "milk"
nasty. just drink milk like a normal person.

>>37451456
I like to drink boimilk

>>37451470
bilk

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>>37451541

>>37451569
cute gif, is it ok if I save it?

>>37451621
yes
my bf sent it to me uwu

Good evening mmg do you like my oc
https://files.catbox.moe/99jkwx.jpg
Shes a cis girl doe

>>37451689
>Shes a cis girl doe
borin

>>37451689
no i do not like her desu

>>37451689
how did you draw her? how long have you been drawing? seems like a cool hobby

>>37451397
schnozgs me

>>37451717
5 years

>>37451725
I wish I were her
what does schnogs mean though?

>>37451730
bretty cool, keep on goin

I HATE MY RETARDED BRICK LIFE

they don't think it be like it is, but it do

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QhMo4WlBmGM
me when speaking English

so when do i fall in love? when do i get a cute gay guy? when do we get to make each other feel safe in a hostile world? when do i get to feel the loving embrace of god in his arms?

>>37452668
2 weeks

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There's literally no point in anything at this point other than killing myself, i've exhausted all other options.

kys

>>37453869
that means "kiss" in Danish

>>37453166
Love yourself, you'll be happy, you'll be fine.

>>37452668
I have a snuggle makeout movie hangout with a cute trans girl this weekend.
>>37453166
Nice eye makeup

>zero browbone
>obviously passes
>in mmg
kill yourself

I am not a woman on the inside or outside

they don't think it be like it is, but it do

why was I cursed to be a tranny

I just want a waist smaller than my hips. I could cope with everything if I had that.

in considering the nature of whether it be like it is I have begun to suspect that, despite them thinking that it do not, it inevitably do

>>37452017
i think this game actually contributed to my agp growing up

not the visuals but the dialogue

>>37454496
are you really fat?

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>>37454541
lol really? that's funny though I do remember it gets saucy with the villagers and their... quirks, but for me it's the art... they're all so beautiful, even though it's a decided departure from the usual art style (same with the music seriously like the percussion and the bass line here just captivate me https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zPIy8RuVEFI) and shanoa is such giwtwmfuel

picrel is literally me if I wasn't old and bald and ugly

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>>37454606
No, just slightly bricked. Little love handles right on waist exasperate things.
>>37454612
Never played any castlevania, but asked for this game for Christmas. It's a collection of 3 of the older ones.

>>37454910
>It's a collection of 3 of the older ones.
that's cool, the DS games are some of the better ones in the series! don't play Dawn of Sorrow just yet though if you get it, that's a sequel to Aria of Sorrow on the GBA and comes in its own Advance Collection from a few years ago (also something you can emulate really easily on your phone or w/e too)

>>37453912
Why would i love myself when everyone else justifiably hates me and wants me to die i'm not that delusional

>>37454910
how tf are you measuring. you have to be really obese to have more waist than hips

>>37454496
>>37454910
lose weight, exercise, and post on a human body where you are measuring because that seems wrong or at least unhealthy

xth for HANG YOURSELF if you are ugly (you are)

ew

>>37448589
add me on discord you magnificent freak
want you to post nonstop weird whining shit, might even reply once in a while telling you to wear the dress and take the pills
>>37448956
hi myself at my lowest
>>37449176
> pretty man with soft tiny manboobs and a youthful lack of facial hair
omg! omg! omg! omg!
>>37453166
let me lick your eye
>>37456948
hello larry

>>37448587
how does estrogen make people more shy? i'm incredibly outgoing.

>>37457015
it doesn't except for those ashamed about being troons with boobs, imho ofc
>incredibly outgoing
would you share a beer with an old freak if i (extremely unlikely) ever come close to your location? asking for outgoingness judgement :P

The pain has become shrimply unbearable, so I have chosen to krill myself. Goodbye, everyprawn.

>>37457015
estrogen gave me a lot more self-confidence but also made me a lot more self-conscience and anxious about people's reactions to my presence

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>>37457142

*whining*

>>37457350
this is whiny crybaby general after all.

>>37457361
*more whining* *begging* *more whining*

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>>37457361
true

How do yall deal with feeling like your life is already over because you'll never be pretty?

>>37457422
i tell people to sui on mongolian throat singing forum and i feel better

>>37457422
can't relate, my life is over because I've blown every opportunity I've ever had and it's now impossible for me to make anything of myself. It's a little worse than just being unhappy with my appearance IMO.
I will never have a career, I will never be talented, I will never have a family, I will always be a loser.

>>37457439
I hate lapping as a woman

>>37457475
Larping*

>>37457422
i cope by being called pretty every single day by multiple people irl
theyre all lying to me but it helps me stay delusional

>>37457468
extremely relatable, my being an ugly tranny is the least of my problems tbqdwys

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what will manmoders do when pluto's kiss happens? president jim stonecold can't save you

why can't i feel my attraction to men properly?
idk why

I am ashamed of being attracted to men.

I can't watch videos of girls without wanting to kms. I cannot express myself in the way I want to...

I wish I had no sexuality of any kind.

I still don't know what my type is and why most of the time I find men just kind of neutral or gross sexually but I definitely find myself attracted to some men sometimes, and sometimes unexpectedly or counterintuitively... that's been new to me with hormones

>>37457829
I like seeing girls that make me go giwtwm even if it hurts a little and I get jealous, or girls that make me imagine life together with them or make my heart do funny things or say out loud "she's hot"

>>37457861
"I will never be anything remotely feminine."

>>37457796
idc, i just cannot feel it properly with this male body
>>37457850
it is not cool, i do not have a proper sexuality and it sucks
>>37457861
>I find men just kind of neutral or gross sexually
same but ik that i am into them bc i get turned really hard by masculinity sometimes and i also like dicks, my attraction to men increased after i found out i was trans but i still do not feel it fully properly

for some reason i want to plunge my estrogenized tongue deep into manmoder butthole

>>37457890
meta-attracted?

>>37457929
pls no agp bs here, it is probably just dysphoria

>>37457959
AGPs are dysphoric.

>>37457970
...
your whining makes me hard, want a gangbang with me and two virile goats?
don't worry, the goats are exclusively for you :)

>>37457970
agp is not real and never was

>>37457998
I know it's real because it's what I am and if you deny my subjective internal experiences you're doing literally the same thing Ray Blanchard does.

>>37457970
>AGPs
aren't a class of people by any real or consistent measure

>>37458023
they why there exists agp transbians that are not attracted to men in any shape or form and they never were ever

>>37458046
what? what are you even asking? what bearing does the existence of gynephelic transbians have on anything?

chudette x larry agp rapehon sex
hope chudette tops

>>37458065
nvm, believe in agp

>>37458081
again, I experience it, so it's not really a matter of belief. It's just how I am and have always been.

one reason why I'm proud that I'm only attracted to men is because women are boring as shit while men have interesting hobbies and interests

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>>37457998
I have agp and also have dysphoria. I am very ashamed of it as well......

>>37458094
>>37458134
explain to me how you experienced 'agp'
agp is always a cope for smth that you do not want to accept, reppers also used to cope with agp like crazy in repgen

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>>37458080

want to bleed

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I "have AGP" or "experience AGP" in terms of the literal namesake and certainly even have some sterotypical "AGP" traits but also absolutely do not fit into the bl*nchardian "framework" and consider it simply to be a facet of my sexuality pertaining to my internal identity and how I view myself in relation to both myself and others

more like AGAMP anyway but still

>>37458162
elaborate sexual fantasies about feminization/emasculation. having a highly idealized fem version of myself that I have the same sort of emotional longing for that I would for an absent lover.

>>37458194
This! There's this constant longing to look into the mirror and see her again and it's torture....

>>37458255
that is literally just regular euphoria/dysphoria

>>37458258
I fell in love with what I perceived to be a female version of myself at 20-21 and became dysphoric shortly after. I believe AGP causes dysphoria.....

>>37458324
other way around, there is no reasonable way to conclude what you are concluding without inserting assumptions rooted in your fear of self-acceptance or sense of being "other" from the real heccin valid legit trutrans trannies

>>37458357
I don't feel like Agp invalidates me but I'm scared of not having answers and I'm totally fine with agp explaining me at the moment. It's just.... why one day did I start feeling like this?
Im still in a bit of denial but I want to be a "real heccin valid legit trutrans tranny," so I guess that sums up that. I haven't even started to transition yet and it seems like it's just a dream.

Friendly reminder that if things ever seem like they're getting better, it's just temporary and they will soon get worse again.

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>>37458692
>>37458733
>don't worry, you'll be gone with me...

who up eating they feelings?

>>37458957
I'm going nom nom on em. Can I have some pills.....

i am going to sleep, fuck you god, how can you be so cruel and merciless and awful towards me, i beg every day to you to make my pain stop, tf i did to you, i hope i do not wake up

>>37458821
I'm 22 and still not on hrt, I'm holding onto a dream of becoming feminine enough for myself. I think I'll need ffs too....

I'm just a little lad moder
https://youtu.be/YArBj-pknNE?si=l8gz-kKgZq0955jN

>>37459003
get on hrt now retard. it’s the best decision i ever made even if im
going to sui anyway

>>37459003
>still not on hrt
why not? do it fucking now

i do not even want to kms bc i am trans, my life just sucks overall and i have no meaning or reason to live, i literally just live to kms and i suffer heavily, what is even the point if i do not enjoy any of this, literally nothing, just to work my ass off to hopefully get the chance to be a wageslave for people that have way better lives than me, wtf is even that, i am ugly dumb unemployed worthless, i am subhuman to everyone, i hate this shit, is not even abt being trans, it just sucks overall and i cannot even improve it at all, even my 'best' life that i could possibly have it is completely dogshit miserable, how to people live in this shitty society that makes you a slave idk, i either go to prison or kms idk really anymore, suicide is preferable though to this life.. fuck you god honestly, fuck you.. you are the biggest asshole ever for 'gifting' me this life that i have so little to no control over..

gohtsecks?

>>37459107
no so real. because how do you make a universe filled with pointless retarded suffering. i know this is reddit tier but i mean really. this world is empty and painful

>>37459022
I should get my hair cut like this

been abused and abandoned by everybody around me since i was a childcore

Any tips for passing as a human?

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>>37459311
my advice is to stop trying, I'm done with all of that

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>>37459033
>>37459048
I really want to do it before the year ends, I don't even know where to begin but I have the internet. This shit is scary. My dick is gonna stop working, I'm gonna grow moobs, and I'll probably just look like a h0n.

>>37459608
my dick still works just fine, if a little smaller

>>37459740
Can you give me your pills?

I wish there was a dick-breaking pill. even with next to 0 T in my body I still get hard easily.

>>37459768
nnnno, I need them for me

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>>37459792
Uhhhh, yyyyyes! HA! now you have to give them to me.

>>37459780
post evidence?
sorry :( am the worst "person" in this general and should cut deep
same btw, testosterone is undetectable but i can still get kinda hard

>>37459848
>>>/lgbt/hrtgen
I have had results I am happy with by doing the following (via informed consent with planned parenthood)
>started 2mg sublingual E and 50 mg spiro daily
>ramped up to 8mg over 1 year adding another 2mg E every 3 months
>at 1 year with moderate development dropped spiro, added prog 200mg nightly boofed, and switched to 4mg weekly injections
>had high levels and reduced dose to 3mg weekly at 4 years
>also started finasteride because diffuse thinning was getting bad and initial MPB recovery had stalled (don't wait to start this or duta if you think you want it!)

>>37459878
no I'm not showing you my penis.

>>37459901
bet you don't have one
it's fine to have a micropenis... it's a clitoris
and i don't want you to post your clitoris... if anything post pussy

gross

>>37460077
>bet you don't have one
if only

>>37460077
my tiny penis is awesome

>>37460121
"doubt"
>>37460131
evidence?
and i bet...
mine is too :3

my giant penis is awesome

MY COCK IS MUCH BIGGER THAN YOURS

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>>37460140
>evidence?
u first

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Any of you want a gun from cabelas before I leave?

>>37460203
I kinda want a Sig P238 if they have one

>>37460203
dude every time I've been in there (and waiting hours because of rushes due to incoming gun law changes) I would just drool over some of the pretty guns they had like some that just looked like oldschool craftsmanship and then hilariously teched-up hick shit like digital camo hunting rifles and shotguns, I love it lmao

>>37460221
that sounds nice for concealed carry, I've got a P365 I'm happy with but need to actually take out and get comfy with (and get in the habit of carrying around)

>>37460203
I'll take it.

>>37460231
P365 seems like a really practical choice but the P238 with the wood grips just looks really nice. Like I'm mostly getting guns I appreciate the aesthetic of and want to take to the range and play with so it's kinda important. It'll be ages before I go for a CCW or anything too.
Also recently bought a Beretta 3032 which is beautiful and I hear isn't snappy to shoot for such a small gun. .32 is kinda hard to find but fortunately stocked at some local stares. I'm in CA so I don't have it yet it's still in the 10 day period

The drinking dreams are back

>>37460290
dreams about drinking or dreams after drinking idk?

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>>37460231
>oldschool craftsmanship and then hilariously teched-up hick shit
I went to a number of gun stores recently looking for .32 and it was really funny seeing how the different stores matched the different areas they were in. Bass pro in a more conservative region had a boomer dad customer base and guns that would appeal to that. And then close to where I live in a more urban bay area blue zone the store had three young men who reeked of weed browsing for guns that were this tacky plasticy yellow chrome. Picrel but also defeatured for CA so it looked even stupider

>>37460404
dreams about drinking. happens whenever I get sober and start to get my life in order. dreaming that I'm sneaking around, hiding booze all over the house or stealing it from people, all the shit I do irl when I drink.

>>37459884
3mg weekly mono is low right? i do 5mg every 5 days

might fuck around and fast for a week

>>37448382
>QOTT
nah i got into straight edge ata. young age and now im just committed to the bit.

so when do i get to live my life? is this it? why does it all feel so fake. i have a white aura

>>37460659
yeah but I was still over 200 with that lol

>>37460406
What Bubba doing now?!

>>37460406
this just makes me think of goldeneye 64 lol that's so tacky

I think what hurts me most is that I think I genuinely had a little bit of hope when I started hrt
sucks to know that I'll probably die of suicide, I do john 50 stuff in my 20s very frequently and it's unbearable but there's nothing I can do

I think I used to have a porpoise

>>37460973
What do you mean John 50 stuff???!!!

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https://www.avitale.com/essays-details/?name=the-gender-variant-phenomenon--a-developmental-review-5
>John, a 50 year-old genetic male, medical research scientist, married (23 years), father of three children aged 20, 17 and 7, phoned me after experiencing a panic attack severe enough to require emergency attention from paramedics at the airport on his way to give a presentation at a conference. John gave me only his first name and informed me that I was the first to be told what he was about to tell me. He said he was "gender dysphoric" and that he was "desperate." Feelings that were once "controllable through sheer force of will," had increased to where he now was having protracted periods where he would close his office door, lie on the floor and weep quietly while curled up in the fetal position, holding his genitals in pain. Other than intrusive and repeated fantasies of being female, he had refused to allow himself any overt form of female gender expression. He reported feeling that if he was to cross-dress and be caught, he would dishonor his wife and family. Having attained international recognition for his work, he was also concerned about his professional reputation. The only other form of temporary relief came through masturbating, often up to five times a day.
>Our work together over the last three years has been slow. However, with the help of extensive individual, group, and family psychotherapy, augmented by estrogen replacement therapy, with the full permission of his family, John has recently taken on a female name and is living full time in the female gender role. She is in the process of renewing and redefining her relationship with her family, and has successfully returned to work after an extended leave of absence.

who G3 here? lul

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holy fuck holy shit today i wore a beanie to cover my brow ridge and dressed like my lesbian babysitter and ate sushi so my breath smelled like fishy pussy. now i pass one divided by $H_5(2,4)$ of a percent, where $H$ denotes hyperoperation.
then
an old Italian mathematician/physicist/professor/baldee (not to be confused with bladee) referred to me as he, then as she, then as he again, then said he couldn't tell, then asked my name. that means i get gendered female 0.000001% of the time, which is more then 0%
then i came in my pants instantly handsfree moaning in the middle of class, pulled out my meth pipe to celebrate, smoked a bowl, snorted a line, fucked him, killed everyone else, summoned Satan (hail victory), and then
but right before that the most handsome man ever he said he spoke Spanish and was indigenous to Columbia or something i forgot and he had name I'd never heard before and couldn't pronounce he was so hot. he's like "I'm indigenous" and omg... he's LITERALLY a chad in real life like literally gigachad lvl. 9999. he looked like that one guy who said American deserved 9/11. anyway i came in my pants when he winked at me and said he wasn't even in the math class. and then he corrected the processor multiple times in class he was so handsome and smart. getting miss gendered (i am in fact a man and identify as such) by the professor in front of him gave me so much euphoria that i commited 9/11 right in front of everyone. but i didn't tip the woman that sold me the sushi so i have her a dirty look. and that's the story of how i male failed on meth in math class with fishy breath as a bi lesbian while lusting after an indigenous chad. how do you stop racing thoughts? i still hear voices saying my other names even though i detransitioned. i think im being gangstalked by shadow government agents on black helicopters broadcasting voices at me using antennas but im officially a lesbian anime girl now so they can LITERALLY all suck my fucking dick. fuck all of

Got called mate today after a bunch of male failing om back my brethren

>>37461354
I can't believe anime is real

>ugly man before hrt
>pretty man after
>dont pass as anything but a man
>ugly bitch tits
im attractive now so i cant detrans it would make no sense but i hate my breasts and just wish i could wake up in my old body.

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>>37461712
>have dysphoria
>take hormones to help alleviate
>have different dysphoria

>>37461811
>transition
>detransition
>transition again
let's see how many times i gotta do this before I make up my mind

the chaider has new art...

>>37460973
same. I thought not having that masc facial features would make HRT help a lot more. instead i've been on it for 3 years and seen literally zero change besides tits. it's all a lie.

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no comments were made, instead i sprayed, cum in his ass (raw+unannounced+no lube+

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worried im going to rape a stranger in the park at night in the mouthagain omg... i LITERALLY need my dick so fucking bad right now oh my god yes oh my god the jews did this to me, didn't they? by putting flouriride in the water!!1

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YOU were SUPPOSED to FIX me INSTEAD you BROKE me WHY??/

>>37462394
where did you find that video of me?

>>37461938
I've done the same. And I'm dead set now on being a trans woman. If I detrans again or cut my hair super short, it's against my will or I'm having a mental breakdown and will be dead soon.

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they aliens are controlling my thoughts
the government is controlling my thoughts
little voices in my head telling me to kill
little lolis on my screen telling me to jork
jews under new york it all makes sense now they turned me into a bipedophile I FUCKING HATE WOMEN AND NO IT'S NOT A JOKE, MAN

Please stop..

>>37462473
I envy your commitment, I think I'll never be satisfied with one or the other.

I Wll nevsr bee nodmal i literally have no ftoends givk al of upu i hzte iou so much right now gonduck yourself i hae ipu hTd oTe you i haye yku it's all our fault haha my fingsrs hsdt and i xant atop bass of yku im rOing steangers because of you the rape is real gbe megh is feal i am a rapist s edything is reL i am sFanic i am being posssessed by demons

who hurt you?

>>37462558
whats this pic from wtf

Meth schizo wtf is your fucking problem?! Why the fuck would you post that? Why the fuck do you think any of us want to see that here? I seriously can not handle those images anymore. Please just go away from us, leave us forever. You never post anything of value, and you always push everything away. Go post on somewhere filled with people like you, on b or something. God fucking damn you seriously, I fucking hate you so much. Please just FUCKING LEAVE FOREVER!

>triggered by gore
lol

>>37462638
idk it's kind of hot

>>37462242
Honestly if hrt can't at least make me look a little bit cuter I'm about to rope. (Yes I need help)

>>37462652
who rejected you?

I am dreaming and when I awake none of you will be here anymore.

>>37462708
I consumed too much of it in my 20s. I didn't realize it was having an effect on my mental till I was years into the curiosity. A few videos kept me up at night, and changed the way I slept for years. I've grown over past it, and the ptsd is gone. But yes, I do get triggered by certain gore now. I'm not gonna feel bad about that. It's fucked up.

>>37462733
oh, you mean like, actually triggered not 4chan "triggered"
sorry, I kind of get it, I think it may have been bad for me to be exposed to that kind of stuff early on and I know it desensitized me but some stuff has definitely left me a little haunted

>>37462733
>>37462744
>IVE SEEN FOOTAGE
> I STAY NOIDED

I finally got my hair cut after 5 years lmao
I'm going to grow it out more and try to actually style it this time
Anyone here trim their own hair?

So tempted to post a picture of my face so everyone can tell me it's over.

>>37463004
I've cut my own hair for 11 years

how do I get a manmoder bf who would cook for me and also beat the shit out of me

Just wanted to drop in to tell you all that I have started using a binder to hide my tits but now I have to ask, what the actual fuck is going on in this thread?

>>37463079
You new here?

>>37463094
Kinda I guess?
I've visited these threads a couple of times but I'm not a regular here.
I'm just manmoding until I can pass so I figured it was worth talking to other manmoders.

Wasn't expecting this thread to be so deeply schizopilled is all.

>>37463112
Yeah well true manmoders don't have an end-date for their manmoding
Manmoding is for life and that's why we're so miserable, we don't have the luxury of imagining ourselves transitioning socially

>>37463122
Then what's the point?
Like, if you're not doing it to avoid discrimination from normies until you're confident that you can pass at least decently well then why are you manmoding in the first place?

>>37463137
to reduce dysphoria, obviously

>>37463146
How does pretending to be a dude reduce your dysphoric feelings over being a dude?
If anything you're magnifying those feelings by doing that.

>>37463173
taking the estradiol is what reduces the dysphoria. manmoding is just an unfortunate secondary consequence of taking HRT when you're a hopeless neverpasser

>>37463137
Making repression tolerable
I tried repressing without HRT and it was impossible and so the only other options are manmoding or suicide
>>37463173
Yeah well what do you know?
You can't even fathom the choice manmoders make because you've never been reduced to such a pathetic and hopeless state

>>37463191
I only started transitioning 5 months ago and I'm 30 years old.
Give me some time. Unless I turn out to be a luckshit of monumental levels I'll probably end up on the same page as you all eventually.

Maybe gonna be leaving manmode soon. FFS looks like it's on the horizon. But wow everything feels so much worse in the meantime. It's like I'm full-on repressing again, the dysphoria is constant. If I have this opportunity taken from me I will probably do something drastic that ruins my life.

>>37463173
for some people, for me it's still comfortable like being a man was but without the physical detachment and awkwardness that went so deep it made me want to die

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I love all of you people, goodnight luvs and mwa!

>>37463231
Yeah well I hope it works out for you and you manage to socially transition

>>37463258
Thanks.
I hope so too, though as I said I plan to manmode until I pass, which means if I never pass, I'll never socially transition.

>>37463265
I think about this every night. You start thinking there's no point to this process, best thing you can do is not give your hopes up.

>>37463265
Best to keep yourself motivated and hopeful
Also make little steps whilst you manmode like voice training, makeup, etc

>>37463004
Feels good doesn't it? I'm gonna get consistent cuts now. Less weight, cutting off the less than healthy ends. Feels amazing. Revived my slight curls too.
>>37463009
Might as well. Most people here have posted face before. Post yours and let us get to know you for better or worse.
>>37463265
Manmode 99% of the time till i get ffs. I wish I lived in California so I could just get a job someone that covers it. As progressive as my state is, I don't think there's any that do it here.

>>37463350
Man it's gonna be a while before I can get FFS. A large portion of my facial hair is blonde so I'll need to spend like 1-2 years on electrolysis and save up to get the procedure done overseas because there's like one experienced FFS surgeon in my whole country and I am not interested in being on a 3-4 year wait list for a surgery that will be more expensive and probably lower quality than I could get from another country.

>>37463375
Yeah im years away too. Currently paying off a good chunk of debt rn. So I can't even start saving yet. Unless an aunt or two croak, and I start getting trust fund money or I meet a boyfriend who will fund it, I'm cooked till I'm like 40.

my girlfriend and i got drunk tonight. i’m not 100% sure since i was/am drunk, but im about 80% sure she called me “he”. how should i kill myself

>>37463495
Cis or trans girlfriend? Cis, break up with her. Trans, misgender her back tomorrow.

>>37463504
she’s trans. i don’t blame her. she’s a passoid and im a manmoder. everyone else calls me “he”, why would i expect her to be any different? i deserve it for being a hon.

Iwnbaw
Iwnbart
I’m just an agp manmoder
It’s over

imagine ever malefailing

>>37465023
I malefail at work sometimes.
It always stresses me the fuck out.

>>37465023
i malefailed once at a wedding. it got my hopes up but not anymore

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loser girl, i mean MAN, autumn is here

tfw will never walk with manmoder gf holding hands a beautiful autumn day

>>37465311
You failed
Go back to mtfg

tfw will never hold hands with anyone

>>37465454
im a permanent neverpasser, leave me alone

>>37465482
Yeah sure

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>>37465511
you would cry if you lived one day in my body

>>37463265
This was what i thought a year ago but ive been girlmoding half of the time for a while. Its very tempting...

>>37465387
need

a woman taking a picture of herself in a mirror, techwear look and clothes, trans rights, school class, dirty mirror, long hair windy, antialiased, older male, tomboy, dichromatism, sup, sports photo, looking tired, uncropped, school, a very tall, long, by Aaron Bohrod, he is at college

>>37465529
I already whimper myself to sleep
Soon I’ll be numb

you would cum if you lived one day in my body

>>37465968
real, i cant wait to be dead

>>37465311
I promise myself to start going on more walks and actually enjoy this autumn

>>37466022
I’m already dead in a sense
A corpse parading
Witness me

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and thats whats real
we fear what we feel

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>>37467693
I MYSELF SHALL DRIVE YOU TO THE GATES OF MANHALLA

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>>37465998

>>37465998
I'm team nevercum

Fugue state is my new state

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same deliriestie

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I WANNA GO BACK TO FOREVER
YOU'LL ALWAYS BE MY FOREVER

huh, it be like that, huh?

locktober?

>>37468716
no need

>>37468684
they don't think it be

what it once was, is, and may yet be it will in all probability continue to be, is, and observably has been

I don't think therefore I don't be.

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>>37468815
got me

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https://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/0/03/En-au-balls-deep.ogg
feel every vein in my cock throbbing hot in your throat little bitch
youre a weak faggot so suck and lick and taste my dicks skin and tip and drink my slimy jizzum like youre thirsty
im going ballsdeep

>>37468826
oh my god I love waio's art so much, I was so into that as a teenage repressor when his new stuff was getting posted to gurochan or old /g/

Computer, run program "Manmoder Torture Chamber". Safeties off.

computer show me some “stinky femcels”

hey /mmg/, what's the difference an apple and a baby?

I don't usually cum on an apple before I cut it up and eat it

̳

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what is this like cards against humanity nationals in here?

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>>37469052
take me back

My life is a constant exercise in trying to jam square pegs into round holes.

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>>37469083

>>37469083
sounds like a fun evening

>>37469102
it's not

>>37469131
guess you aren't using enough force

Made an ffs consultation appointment for August of next year.

“alright you know the drill one ‘iwnbaw’ for the 2mg e or one face post for the 4mg e”
here in manmoder civilization everyone goes for the ‘iwnbaw’, going for the face post for only 2 more mg of estrogen is just too risky

>>37469227
now you have a reason to not an hero for at least that long

life is pretty dull... and i am pretty crap

>>37469227
nice... where you getting it?

wow I love being a man! I love being so tall, that is, 188 centimeters tall! It is so fun! I also have very broad shoulders which look really good on me

detransitioning tonight. hoping it inspires me to kms

iwnbaw, and id rather be dead than me a man. this life is worse than nothing. being assumed to be a normal man makes me want to kill myself. i’m no better than any man and men deserve to die

>>37470190
don't do it, faggot, start girlmoding

>>37470258
i’d be a gigahon. thats the only thing worse than being a man

>>37470280
start small

>>37470302
no point

>>37470320
ok

i want to learn how to forgive myself for being a man. i can’t do that as a man in a dress

and somehow stopping estrogen will
lmao

>>37470409
>will help
it won't, btw

idk to me this is all weird and scary enough to go through especially alone without giving up the one thing that has stopped things getting worse changed me in ways that actually made anything better at all

nvm. it would make gf too sad. i reluctantly continue

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hickory dickory dock
you fags can suck my cock
>>37470353
>i want to learn how to forgive myself for being a man
that's exactly your problem
there's a difference between what you want and what you need
you ''''''want'''''' to ''''''learn how to'''''' forgive yourself
you NEED to BECOME UNforgiven, PSYCHO-DRIVEN MANIAC, WHO WILL MAINLY ACT, SICKER THAN SICK
embrace evil = ultimate enlightenment
allow the purity evil to guide you!!1
the ONLY WAY to embrace THE EVIL WITHIN is to LET IT ALL OUT and NOT HOLD IT IN
>hurr durr self-love is begging others for forgiveness
no, retard. self-love is when you simply are, and ask forgiveness of no one

>>37448382
new: >>37470838