>be me>dysphoria has been worse lately, but manageable>showering, look down at my body to make sure i haven't cut myself shaving>feel rush of intense disgust>brain essentially shuts off functions other than notions of"THIS IS NOT YOUR BODY" and "why are you in a man's body? you're not a man">flashbacks of being in a woman's body despite never being born female>begin to push my torso and my legs away to try to get away from my body>take deep breaths and calm down just before i start tearing skin off>wtaf just happened>finish shower, go to bed feeling awfulmy dysphoria has been worse every day since. i've had one of the worst breakdowns since my dad died a couple of days after this happened, and it just feels worse with every passing day. im considering roping so hopefully im reborn a woman or im not at all and i dont have to be a man. i cant take this shit anymore. im either going to kill myself or spend my life sleeping and dissociating so i can forget im a stupif fucking gigahon.
>>38582231sorry anon life can be cruel
