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full on reppers: why do you rep? why not just hrt manmode?
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>>38632756
I will never be a woman, so why try? And male brain is a real thing, male socialization is a real thing, it's hard to get over that, ditch all your male interests (the ones that are absolutely incompatible with femininity) and turn your life around so drastically to live according to a new gender identity.
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>>38632756
because i don't want tits. also im in a very weird schizo state where I'm self aware of being AGP, autistic, male, dpdr. I don't really have a sense of being a woman in a man's body, yet I'm also dysphoric and mentally unwell.

I'm going to try getting into CD before I take hrt. I just need something to ease the strain
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>>38632820
>I will never be a woman, so why try?
Also, that's not to say you should resign yourself to hypermasculinity and put up all these armors to hide your inherent femininity, that's how you'll end up depressed and suicidal, crossdressing, sculpting your body to be more feminine, taking care of your hair, taking care of your appearance, spending more money on your appearance than regular guys, growing your hair long, all these things are completely fine, it's just that transitioning is a really fucking big step, growing boobs is a big deal, there are some steps you take that can definitively kill the social perception of you as a man, you can be a feminized man and still be a man, you cannot be trans and be perceived as a man, you're perceived as trans, a woman, or as something else.
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>>38632820
>>38633035
have you found any comfort or happiness in this? did you ever hypermasc rep?
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>>38633066
>have you found any comfort or happiness in this?
I'm happier than when I was in denial about it that's for sure, now I can just buy some makeup and use it, I can buy clothes and use them.
>did you ever hypermasc rep?
Yes, working out, going to the gym, joking around (at the expense of others), radicalizing politically, all of that, it's not the most unbearable thing at first, but it will grate on you, it will fester underneath the surface, until you inevitably break and realize it was all just an armor you crafted for yourself.
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>>38633142
im gonna try out CDing. jerking off doesn't really seem to help, i need to live some of it for the comfort I've found

god dang agp
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>>38633035
i still dont quite get it. manmoding while on hrt is possible for many, growing tits can be an issue but only really if you have to wear little clothing or go topless - if you grow tits that dont pass as gyno w your physique in the first place

idk im genuinely curious bc i cant imagine a conscious repper life that isnt just being an outcast shut in, and if youre gonna be that why not take hrt about it. i obv do understand reppers who can actually just not think abt it, focus on other life things, but if youre a tttt poster you simply arent that - you know youre repping, i mean, and are actively exposing yourself to more trans thoughts
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>>38633194
nta but in my work i wear a polo shirt and do physical stuff. interact with people all day. really don't think boobs would play
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>>38633194
HRT is actually a big step in so many ways that aren't often talked about, it is best for people who will transition to take it, not people who aren't yet sure of transitioning, it's too big a step, it can have side effects, it will make you a woman "hormonally", it can affect your sexual drive in ways that might be psychologically harmful for someone who has lived several years as a biological male (feeling impotent. weak, desexed...) it can make you grow noticeable boobs, which are in fact permanent, it can increase gender dysphoria even more in some cases if you previously had milder gender dysphoria, it can mess up your mental health.
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>>38633519
i guess, i never had any doubts once i knew abt HRT, how to get it etc, was kind of an "ok ill do this or ill die before thirty" moment that hasnt rly ever wavered. also i was a gigafailed male - no interest in sex or doing anything at all as a man. i could have lived my life on HRT as i lived it previously even if i failed to socially transition.

i repped previously but it was just like, completely disregarding the physical world and staying away from trans related ideas and communities. just being a neet who drank too much. i did date and stuff but my sex life never worked out like at all, kinda hard to pretend to enjoy using your genitals.
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>>38633913
god i wish I was a neet
>t. repper struggling with working and socialising
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>>38632756
I don't have the money. I don't have the support. I don't have the energy.

It's not worth it.
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>>38633913
It's a case by case thing, for some it will make their lives 100 times better, and some people will have zero hesitancy about it, definitely not all people who have some level of gender dysphoria and trans identification will have such an easy time making such decisions though.
>no interest in sex or doing anything at all as a man
I like cooming and have some interests and desires that are very male oriented, doesn't make me less gender dysphoric and kind of trans identified, it's just that for now it's a barrier for me transitioning, but it's worth noting that all of this can change, and it's worth doing therapy to figure it out and maybe come to terms that HRT and transitioning might be the best answer afterall, totally repressing and denying is not the answer though.
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>>38633913
Also, recently I had a bout of depression due to gender dysphoria that made me a bit impotent (depression can temporalily cause impotency), I really didn't like it at all, I imagine I'd have a really hard time coping with the impotency and changes to my sexual drive on HRT.
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>>38632756
my options for HRT are either DIY injections (i have stupidly bad health anxiety) or going through a years long humiliating process with public healthcare
and at the end of it i'd still be the same disgusting useless person i was before who could never pass as a woman and would just be a burden on everyone around them, so nah i will just keep going until i work up the courage to kill myself!
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>>38634221
Just crossdress for the time being, life can be really worth it, also, you're feminine for you, not for others, to hell with what others think, what matters is what you think about your femininity, if you feel you should transition, transition, if you don't feel it, then don't, but killing yourself is just admitting defeat, think of this as a battle, do you want to admit defeat or not? You are feminine even if you don't pass, you can be feminine even if you don't look feminine or can't look feminine too, being feminine is a state of being, not of looking, a gentle, compassionate, caring, loving man is inherently feminine.
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>>38634221
>i have stupidly bad health anxiety
get over it and diy anyway desu. if you're planning to kill yourself anyway what do you have to lose?
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>>38634221
Being feminine is a state of being, not of looking, but even if you have a harder time looking feminine than others, it is not beyond your reach, it just means it will take more work for you, but you can reach a point where you will be happy with your feminine expression and appearance, for the time being, take the steps you're comfortable with, work towards that point where you are happy with yourself, if you're bald or balding, get money, get hair implants, get a high end wig, doesn't matter what others think, do it for you, if you have a stronger build, be more knowledgeable in fashion, dress for your body, you can look good even if your build isn't in your favor, if you think you have an ugly face, use makeup, hide the imperfections, use filters, live through your photos, cherish them, get money for surgery, the point I'm making is that giving up will just deprive you of the happiness you can feel if you work towards that happiness.
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>>38632756
>full on reppers: why do you rep?
what's the point of transition? I'm 6'2 and conventionally handsome, e won't make me not suicidal
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>>38632756
I did this and regret it and do not recommend, you’re literally throwing away any chance at a normal life to feel maybe 1% better about your body
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>>38634855
You transitioned or repressed?
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>>38634870
I took hrt as a never passer manmoder
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>>38635352
And?
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>>38632756
Too old for this shit and don’t wanna disappoint my family
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>>38633142
>until you inevitably break
and what are you supposed to do then? rope?
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>>38635536
>and what are you supposed to do then? rope?
Give in some, but there are many who just rope, specially if they already built a whole life and structure around their manhood, meaning family, career, status, all of that, the sooner you at least acknowledge this thing, the better, don't bring oblivious people into this madness, that's the single most important thing you have to understand.
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>>38635361
I just hate myself even more, like some of the changes are nice but I just want to go back to repping and feel like a normal person again
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>>38635870
That's why I say HRT shouldn't be so normalized, what about the boobs? Are they noticeable, are they big enough to at least grope? If you haven't had too much breast growth then you might be able to go back to repping, if you had, might as well take the plunge and do your best for your transition to work out, can't really rep if you have boobs, might try binding but I hear it's very uncomfortable and might even hurt.
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>>38632756
i love manmoding on hrt..
reppers are missing out.

can just manmode.
and at the end of the day when the clothes come off
just so much better.. so relieving.
dont even need to fap. just relief knowing i dont have a manly masc body.
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>>38635929
I only need a binder with a t shirt, with a sweater they’re not too noticeable. My bigger problem is that I haven’t really fixed any of the problems that led me to start hrt in the first place, mainly I haven’t made any attempt to build a social life and I still have severe bdd around some (non gendered) aspects of my face. So it’s hard to stop rn bc I know I’ll prob be even more miserable. While I haven’t been able to commit what I really want is to get keyhole and some mild facial surgery and then I think I’ll be much more comfortable repping
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>>38632756
>why not just hrt manmode?
i am hrt manmoding but hiding hrt from people is hard and i'm dumb so i might stop
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>>38632756
i’m in denial, and i’m hoping my tranny problem goes away on its own. usually comes and goes in waves if i’m honest.
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>>38633957
same. i wish i could be a homeless tranny or something. i unironically have golden handcuffs. my career is too well paid to give up and neet out. life sucks.
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>>38636183
I started hrt after getting laid off from my big tech job, now I’ve been a neet for over a year and longing for being a normie tech worker again, at least other people thought I was impressive back then
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If I'm going to live as a male I might as well knock up a broad and get the social benefits of having a family
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>>38636183
>my career is too well paid to give up and neet out.
I left my well paying job to neet

>>38636241
>I started hrt after getting laid off from my big tech job, now I’ve been a neet for over a year and longing for being a normie tech worker again,
I'm in a similar situation and I don't know what I'm going to do. I'm looking for a new job (hopefully remote) and I've been on HRT for a while but I'm not sure if I should go back to repping.
I like the effects of HRT but the stress of hiding this and worrying if I'm going to run out or get caught is getting to me.
>at least other people thought I was impressive back then
I don't think anyone thought that of me

>>38636291
>the social benefits of having a family
Such as?
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>>38636397
You'll see when you're older and you're cut out of respectable people circles because you can't keep up with conversations about whatever the fuck people with kids talk about
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>>38636427
>you can't keep up with conversations about whatever the fuck people with kids talk about
Implying they have enough time in their life to have conversations



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