QOTT: How do you interact with people on the internet? Do you "pretend" to be trans, are you open about your repperdom or do you simply isolate yourself?last thread: >>41020485
i wish i was a human
I'm isolated. If I had trans efriends or something I'd probably pretend to be trans and devolve into hrt manmoding
I wish I was a hot manipulative mommy gf like makima
>>41035374i wish i was a human and i wish i was actually trans>>41035243outside of here i dont interact with anyone on a personal level
Getting a bit tired of this "waking up" lark now>QOTTI don't pretend about anything, except when doing a little roleplay (rare). I don't speak to many people now because I find it difficult to lead conversations (I really, really try not to give closed off answers though). No one online knows I'm a repper, but I'd tell them if they asked. I'm open to almost everything. IRL I'm very isolating. I haven't had met anyone for friendship or otherwise since covid.
my life is such a mess rn I could never transition and there's something comforting about that
>>41035243my friends & strangers only ever huboxxed me and lied or tried to push me to identify as tranny so i just cut everyone off and stay by myself now, the cult mentality in troon spaces around reppers is too annoying
>>41035676I would kill for this All my friends ditched me for transitioning and I was only ever told to detransition by trannies I knew or bullied for being a hon
>>41035618same, i was one of those people who never met friends out of school. The joys of being alone.
>>41035688its not a positive to be bullied and pushed by people trying to force you to be a hon all the time when you know it would make you more miserable believe me
>>41035701i never met friends out of school but i also never met any in school, how are you able to even develop socially if when i talk to males i want to kms because im malebrained and male socialized and when i talk to females im talking to ropefuel
praying for the troon cult to groom me and hugbox me and sex
>>41035718That sounds tuff. I don't know what social development you need to be able to progress a friendship beyond a very surface level stage because I am perpetually flustered, anxious and emotionally guarded. I hate talking about myself so nobody will ever get to know me, god forbid expressing feminine interests.
>>41035701This really only happened as I got older. I was isolated from 21-27 for various reasons. Got some friends after that until covid killed it (plus one of them doing the teenage shit of getting a partner and then ghosting you after, prick). I do enjoy being around people, I'm like an extrovert stuck in an introvert mind.
>>41035720hornygen is --> way
>>41035776repgen is the prayer gen
>>41035794prayers wont save any of us
>>41035243On dating sites I tell guys I'm just a crossdresser. My goal is to actually pass and I'm solely interested in vers men. I'm 5'5" and in shape so apart from some things I can semi pass. From my pic they can generally tell I'm not some boomer with some weird stocking fetish or something. I don't know how else to put it. It's like I'm pre-trans because I really don't want to get lumped in with sissies and boomer crossdressers. Most guys want to smash anyway but I know they're horny so it's not that validating kek. Will I actually troon fully? I don't know. The one thing I hate about crossdressing is that when I look in the mirror I instantly wish for more femme features. I'll wish I had FFS and BA done. I'm scared of uprooting my life and dealing with all the social chaos that comes with being a newborn tranny.
>>41035826bruh fuck off
>>41035840rude. what did I ever do to you
>>41035854you are flaunting your hopes, dreams and ultimate desires >:(
>>41035826you're not repressing anything dipshit
>>41035881oh ok fair>>41035918I mean I'm not on HRT or anything. I guess I'm homeless on this board. I don't know where to post.>>41035928farrah moan? I don't think she actually started HRT until a few years ago.
>>41035951This is very much is one of the most doomer generals on the internet. I'm sure there's other better generals/threads for you
>>41035826>repper
>>41035243i make an active effort to isolate myself because it would be abusive of me to form relationships under false pretenses and my poor state of mental wellbeing means i'd be a net drain on pretty much any social circle i did enteri suppose it's for the best, really, interrupting the lives of ordinary, better people with my bullshit just doesn't seem fair
I feel revulsion about socialising as a man.
I am grossed out by sterilisation. People who fetishise eunuchs are gnarly.
>>41036189idk about fetishism but the idea of male propagation is gross and porn featuring sperm makes me feel ill I don't understand trans women who haven't had a orchi
>>41036229It goes against my need for perfectionism. Impotence feels ugly. A big ugly scar.
>>41036267yes... I must submit to black men... it all makes sense now unironically do a flip
>>41036267that's some psychoanalysis you got there. I'd love for you to try that with me, but that's a bit too navel-gazing atp>>41036273nta but no one mentioned black men...
i can't even cope with porn and chronic masturbation anymore because it makes me so dysphoric and miserable seeing women get fucked. i see a girl sucking a cock and all i can think is she's so fucking pretty i wish i was her, and it makes me feel so sick and upset i have to turn it off
what are you guys doing today? im going to work on a commission i have where a guy gets turned into a woman by his ex and then his ex's brother kidnaps him. i watched the demon slayer movie yesterday and im playing castlevania order of ecclesia.
>>41036652play aria of sorrow
>>41036740I played a few minutes of it but it felt too similar to sotn which I just finished so Im playing this first.
why don't you reppers diy
>>41036766the problem is that nothing shrinks your bones, diy or endo doesn't matter
>>41036766i did for while, doesn’t do anything and growing ugly gyno just makes it worse
>>41036766why would I? manmoding is just stupid, a wasted effort
>>41036766im diying right now but i will probably stop at some point, as expected im not a luckshit and my bones wont let me ever pass
>>41036766am i going insane or do i just not understand what a repper is? i thought we were all staying as men and repressing the desire to transition.
>>41036861>repress>repress on hrt: identifying as a man, living as a man, dressing as a man, etc with a female hormonal range
>>41036897the latter used to be called manmoding, before the passoids claimed the title as their own, just like boymoding
>>41036907same thing, you can't manmode as a passoid
>>41036652I jsut spent 1 and a half hours mindlessly walking around my housing area because I didn't want to come home. It's a bit rainy and there's a chill and I got soaking wet, but I still wanted to stay out all day. Sadly I got hungry and had no money on me.
>>41036652Rotting in bed. Might read fantasy literature slop and grind in the Wizardry mobige. I wish I was dead.
>>41037018wouldn't mind rotting in bed with another repper brainrotting on gacha tbqh
>>41036766It is imperfect
has anyone discovered any sorceries or incantations or hexes to turn into a girl
>>41037116Only in my doujins I'm afraid
I only acknowledge the troonbrain here. I would never talk about it in a non anonymous way. Only my friends know from times I've been blackout drunk.
>>41036766i financially support my family and i'm a poorfag, beyond just that the money's better spent elsewhere (i don't mind living a barely subsistent lifestyle if it keeps food on my siblings' table and keeps my mum out of the red) the act of transitioning would obliterate any chance i have at landing and keeping a job, and even trying to hide it by manmoding runs the risk of me getting disowned by my family anyway - and that's not even getting into the risk of making myself an obvious target for harassment or attacks in public, opening the door for legal persecution against me, and potentially shooting myself in the foot if things get worse in bongistan than they already areit's best for the people around me that i rep and don't make a fuss, given my dad's never been in the picture and i'm the eldest child it's only fair that i act as the "man of the house" and support the people around me rather than fucking off and pissing away money on what boils down to a vanity project when we have skyrocketing bills to paymaybe on a reroll i'll get the chance, who knows, but this time i just need to be as dependable as possible, it's not like they have anyone else to help with stuff anyway
>>41037441Sorry you've got to live life that way. Similar boat, I feel as though I have to remain financially and socially stable or maybe that's the denial I'm telling myself today. Either way, hope whatever you choose works out as best it can. Cheers. :) >>41037116pls
watching Wednesday makes me wish I was a goth girl so bad
i should kill myself nothing will make me feel better so why do i have to keep going
>>41038131Why do we have suicidal ideation and inert fear of death? What kind of retard programmed us this way. What kind of retard programmed us to hate our bodies too.
>>41037804i'm so sorry you're going through that, anon... hopefully it works out well for you eventually! :)
What I truly want out of life is a straight cishet relationship so the dysphoria issue is sorta easy to ignore. I dont really secretly crave or wonder what it would be like to transition, I know what it's like. So I'm not repressing really anymore, I'm just living with an unfortunate situation and just choosing what I really want out of life.
>>41038669would you not feel jealous of your gf? Not into straight relationships myself, but I reckon if I was, I'd wish the roles were reversed or something.
>>41035243qott: i'm a cis male on the internet because i'm a cis male irl. ez>>41037407part of me wonders if some of my friends know and haven't said anything about it; when i was in college there was a night i blacked out and woke up the next morning having cut myself a lot and none of that friend group being willing to talk to me anymore>>41036766diy with no plan to transition seems dumb to me. i've had periods of dissociation where things become fine before, this at least leaves that open; diy would make sure i'm miserable and never passing forever?
>>41036766I've tried that, I've tried to transition even. It's pointless if you're uncomfortable with being a hon and your life is only worse presenting
It's not my fault if in God's plan, he made the devil so much stronger than a man
repression works
>>41039128yeah, the no plan thing is retarded. What if diy resources become more controlled substances, now you're stopping and starting? That sounds nightmarish.
>>41039673I think most people who take hrt plan to transition, it's just a pacing/environment issue. When I was manmoding I always thought "after ffs things will be better" or "when I get a better job it won't matter if I'm trans". Then there's some people who have a little comfort in a more feminine body in private I guess?
:p
>>41039726manmoding as a bridge i get but the original question of why reppers aren't diying it's because i'm never going to transition so why would i do that
hrt repper fatigue
never transition
>>41039848where did you find this picture of me
:^)
:P
;-;
TnT
babydollanons what’s up
>>41035243take your HRT, retards
Is your suicide ideation femcoded too? (pills)
>>41040467is climbing a really tall antenna tower and jumping off fembrained or malebrained
>>41040521That is a bit malebrained. Jumping off a cliff edge could be fembrained though
>>41039726>When I was manmodingdid you detrans or actually transition?
>>41040521fembrained suicides are attempts not suicide
>>41040467i attempted w/ pills twice & my dysphoria started at 6 but i'm still faketrans because i never starved myself and turned out 6'2
>>41040570detrans
>>41040467chronically, almost hilariously malebrained (still trying to find the best possible way to cause the least possible amount of harm to others in the process, stuff like pills for instance are a no go because of my younger siblings, using a vehicle traumatises the operator, leaping off a high place means someone has to clean up, etc)
Anyone remember a piece about reppers/late transitioners of the anxious/avoidant/questioning type that was being posted in this general a few months ago? I don't recall the name of the author and am having trouble finding it.
>>41040673muh family
>>41040673im past caring about inconveniencing. I fantasize a lot about laying my head on train tracks. I remember a girl from Russia i think on liveleak who did this.
whole youth wasted wanting to be feminine, i never had a life
my face is so hilariously masculine, like why is a guy like me cursed with this shit? huge ass browbone huge ass wide flat chin. disgusting. i feel and look so much older than i am
>>41035243>QOTTi complain about repping to the point where it annoys everyone
>>41040935twin frfr
>>41040620I'm 6'4 so hey could be worse you know
>>41041162please tell me you're a submissive male repper
>>41041279I am a submissive male repper ;_;
we're all babydoll submissive male reppers
>>41038711yes sometimes but the emotional connection overcomes the jealousy, and most of the time my jealousy/bad feelings are only temporary and after sitting with the feeling it goes away.
>>41035243Is there a good way to commit suicide that doesn't hurt too much because I'm such a pussy
>>41041605if you're at that point you may as well make an effort to transition first
>>41041605Jumping in front of trains, off buildings, shotgun to the head. Anything that's instant>>41041662Stupid comment
>>41035243YES and fuck you OPBecause all this repper related threads looks sarcastic. It's all glowing you glow OPUsually nobody even talk to me I guess that's cuz ima from third world shithole and esl and I can't even post images Fuck moderators
>>41035243getting my heart broken by a tranny made me just feel so much more pain seeing pretty trannies and wishing i was them
Need to make a tulpa husband I can devote my life too who thinks my balding repper ass is a woman
>>41042022same, god it hurt
>>41040717heh i'm literally james rolfe lol
>>41041662thinking of suicide? have you considered humiliating yourself first?
>>41042789not being able to be who you want to be makes you wanna kill yourself? have you tried being who you want to be?
i'm 5'6 but built like a deep rock galactic dwarf
>>41042499sorry :(
>>41042806yes i tried transitioning, and it failing feels worse than if i just repped. at least if you rep you can still convince yourself that you still have cards left to play, you have hope. I remember being 20 and repping was easy because despite how horrible I felt. I could think of myself at 30 and it felt so far away it was reasonable to imagine I could have fixed myself by then, despite the fact I was doing nothing to go towards it. But when you actually do try and you fail, the hope for that future is taken away and you are forced to face the reality that you are going to be facing the exact same problems at 40 that you were at 20 except with 20 years of baggage and regret. Anyway idk where im going with this, I guess that at least with repping you can always cope by telling yourself your real life hasnt started yet.
its like this, whatever you choose to give your life meaning you will be disappointed. You want to be loved and you'll chase after relationships, have bad breakups and end up an emotional fuckup telling yourself the next one will be true love. You want to be rich you chase after money and end up an exhausted slave telling yourself next year you are going to make it. you want to be a woman to tell yourself you can transition any time you want, and when you do theres always so many more months on HRT or another surgery to save for before you finally feel like a human. until one day you're like 35 fucking years old and finally realise that you spent the last 15/20 years deluding yourself that the world would somehow start caring about your dream
>>41042891>with repping you can always cope by telling yourself your real life hasnt started yettfw detrans repper it's so miserable
I’m so patheticI can’t blame anyone but my own hubrisI was never femaleAnd I don’t even careI just want to be young cute and not ugly blobNobidy to blame but myselfThere is no hopeHrt does nothingI’m tired of existingI’m tired of lying to myselfIwmbaw bevayse I don’t even really want itIf I did I’d have done somethingNoI’m just a guy
>>41043137I don’t even pretend I’m a tranny it a womanI act like a man and talk like a man and am a manI’m a manI’m at the end of my roadI can feel my body testosteronizing and growing masculineIt’s overI’m dying againAnd that’s okI need to learn to live now. As my true selfA man
>>41043161I ever even knew how to be a girlI never was one. I am a corpse.
>>41043137post tits
>>41043238Why? They are gross hairy and bloatedNothing like real girl tits
I love you, babydollanons
>>41043170It’s pointlessI’m becoming a manI always was a manI lived and thought and acted as if I was always a man and that’s all I amYes people can changeThey can becomeBut not meI’mStuck
lol when i look in the mirror my head is like one of those easter island headsfacial features all spaced out, no ffs can fix thatmost of all im embarassed i did identify as trans and my friends were forced to pretend i had femininity.
>>41043460Yeah the lies hurt the most :(I can’t believe I was convinced I had dysphoria or was close to anything feminineMore like close to sissy Mef fetishesSucks but what can you doI’m normal now at leastFree
>>41043614Yeah very normal to be on repper general
>>41036766Too expensive
wrote a whole ass essay about different types of tranny pain expression just for the thread to get prunedreppers are the most oppressed minority.
I can remember having extremely tublr taste as a teenager. Im surprised i wasn't called a faggot more often
Playing The Citadel tonight.Taking a drink every time I die.Wish me luck repbros.
>>41043928holy based citadel enjoyer just don't look down and you won't want to kys like me
>>41043974Thanks for the heads up (haw), but unfortunatelt I've already looked down.I've seen the sights, felt the joy and the pain...
>>41044062i'm sorry you've seen what's in pandora's box......
>>41043614hanging out with a bunch of trans women who all look like women act like women and live as women and im like an incel putting on makeup on taking estrogennothing like them, they know it and i know iti dont deserve to live but ill just keep running my life into the ground as they surpass me in every way
i crush up oral estradiol pills and take them to work with me, i work as a barista. and have been spiking this regulars coffee for about 4 months now. hes so cute looking now :)
>>41044401god i wish that were me
>>41044420i know little reppy i know but i can only do so much as one min wage tranny.
being a barista is a fembrained job it sounds nicei think half the reason im a permaneet is that if i worked id have to go work in a warehouse and either have a bunch of men treating me like one of them or id be humiliated by them for not fitting in
>>41044123It's all right repfren. It was bound to happen sooner or later.Also, any game recommendations? I recently started Tunnel of Doom, and it's fine, but, I dunno, I was expecting more Lovecraft? Probably my fault.Any suggestions for something with a haunted, even hopeless vibe? I'm always down for that.>>41044162It's pointless to focus on "deserve to live." We all live, so we've all been deemed deserving of life. Best to make the most of it in the meantime.
I feel stuck in therapy because on one hand I want to tell my therapist that I am bi and that I actually used to be trans in the past and have since detransitioned, but I also don't really want to talk about that because it's not really a huge part of my life and I feel as though admitting those things would forever color therapy in a way going forward that I wouldn't want because I dont want to work through trans feelings and issues of identity, I've already done that for years and years, and I dont want to be asked questions related to that, when I want help with other issues that I feel are more important. It reminded me of the only person I ever told anything, my friend, who I only told I was bi. She was amazingly supportive and there was nothing bad about that interaction and in some ways I felt relief that I got get it off my chest, but really ultimately I regret telling her because I just dont want people to know that about me. I want to control people's perceptions of me and am uncomfortable not being able to completely control a deeply held secret. I want to approach therapy in way that I seem like a straight cis man and want help related to being that identity and I dont want talk about being bi or detransitioned.
>>41044594Why are you in therapy now, if not for gender malarkey? If you don't mind my asking?
i think the radfems that call tgirls rapist moids on twitter might be right
>>41044663to be able to put myself out there more and be willing to be more outgoing and vulnerable in social situations basically. and me telling my fears and insecurities to a stranger will hopefully help me more secure in myself and will hopefully help with depression and anxiety
>>41044594>I also don't really want to talk about that because it's not really a huge part of my life>posting in repgen
>>41044829If you feel you're still bi, but that can be uncomfortable to admit, then that's something you could possibly bring up with therapist.The "used to be trans in the past" bit, I can see that coloring a therapist's opinion...If you say you tried it, it didn't work and you're done with it now, some therapists will understand that progression. That's something you likely have to feel out based on previous interactions.Either way, if it's not a current issue, maybe no need to bring it up?
should i rep if i'm a bad person and don't deserve to be happy
>>41044900actually this was a last resort after trying lots of other threads and trying to solve on my own and considering trying to tell my T without actually saying specifics. honestly dont expect any advice at all
I think my face is cute enough that I'd be a cute girl but I have a bald as fuck head, super hairy body, and an ugly flat ass. That's why I don't transition.
>>41044914yeah the trans stuff seems to be impossible to admit without possibly just ruining the therapeutic relationship as they fit everything through the perspective that i am trans but just won't accept or admit it. the thing about the being bi stuff is that im not really sure if I am truly bi or not, or if it was just the hrt doing weird stuff. even if I am, im still mostly straight and not really consider ever dating or doing anything in person. not sure it would actually help or just feel bad/weird again. thanks anon
>>41044992Of course. We're all in the same bucket.Hope you find your best and proper course.
>>41044927you should manmode
>>41045075that would make me happier than i am now
its such a humiliation ritual to feel dysphoria over the fact that you have no femininity, im a soulhon. if i transition i know im lying, everyone can see right through it. im a man pretending to be trans. but i still have to transition or ill kill myself. my whole existence is embarassing
>>41045083no it would not
>>41045101are you sure
>>41045131i am immensely sure
>>41036262Or you are just ok and even like that male aspect of yourself thats why the absence of would feel like a scar rather that how it always shouldve been
how-self-defense bad?
ded
>>41035374hooman
>>41035243Been on and off 'mones for a bit. Was on pills for nearly 2 years, stopped, got on injections, have switched to patches but still haven't picked em up so I think my T's in full swing atm. I see bangs on PJ Harvey and Patti Smith and feel such a huge ache. I'd go more femmey-butch if my wallet allowed for it/I didn't look clocky.
self-defense bad?
whats the point in trooning when ill be over 30 years old before i look even remotely like a woman best case scenario
>>41046155You'll be there before you know it. Don't be like me kid and be doing this at 36
>>41035243I completely isolate myself and only post anonymouslyI don't wanna make friends as my irl identity (lie) or as a feminine identity that I'm actually not (lie)
I started reading the bible recentlyI don't regret not transitioning back when I had the chance any less or feel any more comfortable with this body, but I do feel more at peace in my heart with the fact that I'm doomed to misery until I die
>>41044942hair transplants I suppose? your ass will change with exercise and fat distribution. not to be a groomer but yeah
getting harder to ignore the suicidal thoughts ngltoday i saw a trans woman in the street and thought holy fuck i wish that were me i love my wife much more than i could ever love myself though so i will never put her through a transition and she'd never accept me like that anyway
>>41044501same, although I don't think I could even apply to a comfortable job knowing I'd be displaying my ugly masculine self to people. I wish I had a comfortable programming job like the transbian meme :(
>>41044942balding is like hell on earth. not recommended.
>>41046452I really worry about this. My hairline has been receded at my temples since I was a teen, and the males in my family have that triangular pattern, so I can never tell if it's worsening. Telogen effluvium makes me so paranoid too.
You know, you guys should give your life to Jesus. If you have nothing to lose, just try it. Seriously. Go read Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John with the intention of wanting to know Jesus.Best decision I ever made.
>>41042806thats too embarrassing, im just gonna rot in my room forever
>>41042806i dont want to be a man or a hon but i can only be a man or a hon
>>41035243i just need someone to call me a dumb faggot and say i look like a girl while i wear my thigh highs and watch dumb cartoons :c
>>41046930A true loving God would not put me in this body, would not make me hate this body, would not give me the psychological trauma of being associated with this body. I don't want to hear a damn thing about "free will" either, because there are clearly some very heavy restrictions put on our psyche that prevent 99.9% of us from doing some pretty heinous shit
>>41046452It killed me. I've never been the same since and I've resorted to wearing hats 24/7 around other people (I hate wearing them). Balding works for some, but not for me. I gave up any hope of any sort of real relationship after the reaper hit (not like I had much hope before that either). I also don't recommend it.
>>41040620damn, I could of been such an adorable height if I had an eating disorder :c
>>41047020manmoders: Schrödinger's honis it a man or a hon? in that state it's both until proven otherwise
>>41046930Already did>>41047242Didn't do much for me
>>41046930Jesus cares about the people of Judea, he never saw a white man
I want to slap a repper really hard on the face.
>>41047573i volunteer T_T
It just feels like transition is just some weird hedonistic desire and I wish I could he cute a feminine but ultimately it wont make me happy or give me true purpose in life like being in a relationship and having a family would. And if I transitioned I would say goodbye to those things completely. >why cant you be cute and feminine as a guyit just doesnt feel the same. plus women are attracted to masculinity, so I would need some level of such to be in a cishet relationship
the hrt reppers were rightwetrepping is so much better than dryrepping
>>41047614not falling for this psyop again
>>41047614I AM NOT TAKING HRT EVER, IM JUST SOME WEIRD MESSED UP AUTISTIC DUDE
Reppers trying to appear happy and content with themselves is genuinely the saddest shit I've ever seen. you come up with 1000 excuses on why taking e is bad, yet in 10 - 30 years you'll be John 40 gigahons. I get it though, I'm only a step above you in the misery hierarchy being a manmoder and all. I get what it's like not wanting to appear visibly trans. I'm not bashing reppers, I just see through the happy/at peace mask some of you put on.
>student loans company keeps harassing me about getting a high paying job and making repayments how do I tell them I'm totally demotivated as a repper?
>>41047665>the happy/at peace mask some of you put on.Who the fuck here is putting this on?
>>41047665Alternatively, living as a man with breasts is stupid af. Good luck explaining that to any partner and wearing a binder every time you leave your house I regret ever taking hrt
>>41047665im happy and being a cis man is at least 2 steps above the misery hierarchy>>41047696sport gamble to pay it back
wonder if the rep feels would be so bad if i wasnt an incel
>>41047731I don't actually have to pay anything until I earn more than minimum wage, I'm just blocking all their numbers.
>>41047745you're probably an incel because you're a repper
>>41047753i actively choose to be an incel because i dont like people getting close to me and finding out im a faggot. Dont lump all incels together baka
Never been more over
>>41047722>partnerAs if that's even something I want or could handle having lmao
>>41047753I thought it was me being a boring, ugly manlet, but I guess you could be true also. Chicken and egg thingy etc.
>>41047778if ur a manlet you should troon outonly tall mfs should rep since they wont pass anyways
>>41047714this anon for starters >>41047610>>41047722>Good luck explaining that to any partnerI'll never have a partner. Anyways, you could just get buff then your tits would just look like normal moid tits.>>41047731>im happy and being a cis man is at least 2 steps above the misery hierarchyit depends.
>>41047802Nah, that doesn't work just look at buff women. The only success I had was telling gfs I had prostate cancer and it was part of it lmao they were still totally turned off.
>>41047793Being short is literally the only thing I have that would help. The 10,000 other things wouldn't, the major one being age. It's way past my time. I'm just living in misery and repression now until the day I have the courage to jump off a cliff.
>>41047768grim reaper took his hips early
>>41047768suifuel
>>41047825how big are they, because if you're REALLY not trans then there are surgeries to get rid of your boobs.
>>41047849b cups I guess I might transition after ffs so I'm stuck binding
>>41047830same desu except im tall asf and have nothing that would help. life is so unfulfilling i wish i was never born
>>41047836still rly cute tho
>>41047897you can't see shit
>>41047906ur blind
>>41047937they're basically entirely covered. it's just a wide shoulders no hips anorexic man in a wig
I am just a faketrans trender tocd agp/agamp mef rogd non dysphoric hrt malewill never be cuteugly fat male masculin getitng older and odler and eventually go bald
I'm not really trans because I want to be a viking
life is so hard fatigued submissive hrt male repper babydollanon
I transitioned and hopped on HRT when i was 17. A year or two ago i detransitioned, and am now living as a straight man 11 years after the fact. Problem is i'm having trouble reconciling my mistake and the consequences. I dont think im able to produce decent amounts of test anymore judging from my facial and body hair growth, my junk doesnt work that great without either high E or T, and even if i get close to being able to have sex with a woman i have to hide the fact that i have actual fucking tits. I just wish i never even went down this rabbit hole. Spent a decade getting fucked by other men and now i just wanna settle down but i feel like ive just fucked everything up forever. I've never even heard of anyone who's been in my situation, am i alone? Is there coming back from this?Not a repressor just didnt want to make a new thread for ts
>>41035243i had a passing transbian pinkpill me but i messed that up too.its best that i keep repping cuz of optics
I hate that I transitioned for years and never had a transbian gf What a waste on top of a mistake
cute middle aged women
I’m fake trans because I didn’t want to transition as a teen nor have dysphoria for most of my lifeNow I’m just a trender
>>41048352I feel like it's rare to see middle aged people at a healthy weight, or who are even fit, at least where I liveNice surprise
>>41048352I used to kind of look like a warped ugly version of this :(
>>41035243being on this thread makes me wanna kms even more
>>41047665I don't feel happy or at peace. I know I'm probably fighting a losing battle, but it feels impossible to transition and it eats me up everyday. It seems more likely that I'll at least be able to get & hold a good job as a male, rather than get seen negatively if attempting to transition. I wish no one had to deal with feeling like this at all, a very cruel joke of a diagnosis.
I don't shave my arms for optics. It would raise too many questions. But I do shave the rest of my body that I can hide.
>>41048862why not who cares just shave them
>>41048896yep. you would be suprissed how many people or even chuds turn blind eye to it. the key is to be unashammed by certain effeminacy you display. unashammu is what unleashes her in a way. it will make you more sociable to be more natural.
>>41048896"Hey son, why did you shave your arms? You're not a fucking Troon are yea?"
>>41047665>yet in 10 - 30 years you'll be John 40 gigahonsI don't even have ten years left for that.
>>41049268dumb faggot just make yourself unhappy for that hypothetical scenario
>>41039821:p
>>41048896yeah just transition hon, don't let others get you down live your life
hrt repping is genuinely working out really well so far. i look pretty androgynous now and for the first time in ages i don't actually hate the way i look. i've been going out more, socialising more, taking better care of my hygiene and appearance, and in general i'm just more functional than when i was dry repping
>>41043928good-luck
>>41039628How?
>>41050003these "take your pills retards" posts are getting more nuanced>>41047665happy for you to have achieved the enlightenment that the thread full of people who want to kill themselves maybe aren't happy>>41048896actually this though, nobody cares if you just look like a fag
>>41050003Glad it's working out for you, but how do you do this?are you on low-dose HRT or an actual regimen?will you socially transition if/when you grow breasts?
>>41050003i hate myself more than ever on hrtits just assuring me i can absolutely never be a woman
>>41050539that's how I felt too. Try to find a support network or something, maybe it'll get better if you aren't isolated with your negative thoughts
>>41039848never transition
self-defense bad!i fucking despise trannies and i never had patience to approach someone homosexual because of the insufferable queer lgbt culture
>>41050781what're you even talking about schizo faggot
>>41050003yeah i currently take bicalutamide and occasionally like every 2 weeks estrogel or something.it works ok, its nice having less hair. but yeah my face will never look remotely feminine.
im a nerdy guy who is transmaxxing cause i cant get pussy
>>41050781>i never had patience to approach someone homosexual because of the insufferable queer lgbt cultureThat's largely denial. Hope you come to terms with whatever is truly bothering you <3>>41050003I'm really happy for you <3>>41035243Light me on fire this suffering is cruel and unusual <3
>>41050849this is so hotI wish I was a hot woman who could force pathetic incels to transition for me
>>41050849that's not reppingI'm a repper for the same reason I'm an incel
is there a reason not to die?i hate everything about myself. body, mind and soul. i'm rotten. i can't love myself, so how can i ever love another? how can i recieve love from anyone without feeling soul-crushing guilt?i wish i were completely alone, but i'm not. i have family and friends, but they all feel distant and cold. i can't allow the way it will affect them to affect my decision.if i am incapable of seeing myself as right in any way, how can i trust people who say otherwise of me? i can't. i have to rely solely on self-perception, no matter how unreliable it may be.i'm tired of stagnating. it's been years. i have to wake the fuck up and do something soon, or never.
i wish i could go back in time and somehow prevent myself from ever finding out wha a trans person was or is. its caused so much harm to me mentally. constantly being confused about my gender and despairing over who i am and how i look. im so tired
>>41035243im thinking about telling my friend that i want to try hrt tmr. I dont expect much probably and its not like im actually going to do it (since ill end up as a gigahon)but i feel like i have to share my feelings with someone of flesh and blood.
>>41051429the only valid reason to live is absurdity. it doesnt matter either way, treat life as an experiment gone wrong.
>>41035243>>41035505i guess i must be confused about what repping actually is. why do people keep saying that transitioning, even manmoding, would mean "pretending to be trans"? if you aren't trans, how can you be a repper? i thought repper means what it literally means; "repressor". as in someone who deliberately or subconsciously represses their dysphoria and does not seek hrt nor any supplemental support. is it that you think you're agp or succumbed to social contagion or something, therefore you don't deserve transition, and are not trans? because to me, that sounds like something other than repping. there's too many specific implications you'd have to tack on to repping to make it work.
>>41051510i should add that i know that repper could also be interpreted to mean that you are repping as in representing your birth sexbut i've heard both, so
its a hopeless idea because im too old now to ever see myself as a woman, even if i passed id just be thinking "lol im a man that actually fucking tried to turn himself into a woman because im so mentally ill what the fuck"
>>41051429I agree with a lot of what you said, and I feel like I just don't want to live at all>i can't love myself, so how can i ever love another? This though. I never agreed with. I have loved people with all my heart and soul, and yet not once have I ever even liked myself, let alone loved myself.
>>41051510reppers aren't trans, trans people have transitioned either medically or socially and usually both
>>41035618:P
>>41035243rep gen is way too inactive we need more reppers
>>41051931I just need you, babydollanon
>>41044565uhhh have you played bloodborne?also fear and hunger is dreary and hopeless as fuck
>>41045083are you certain? lmao
>>41044927does repping make you a bad person somehow?
>>41051661i think i should rephrase that one. i'm not saying that i have never loved. i certainly have. i just feel entirely unworthy of love from others, so i have no motivation to pursue a relationship.by saying "how can i ever love another?", i was not speaking to ability, but ethics. in a relationship made of one person who loves themself and their partner and another person who loves their partner despite hating themself, how can they consider eachother equals? how can the person who hates themself subject their partner to their self-hatred?
>>41051478reddit tier philosophy
>>41051510you're definitely overthinking this, if someone who's transitioned is posting about iwnbaw it's because of self hatred and not some 7d chess definition of woman>>41051931yeah but then they transition and we're back to square one
>>41051931>we need more repperswe do NOT need this, if you're so worried about the speed of this gen (we use up a thread once every day and a half or so) then you should ask the posters here if they want to add detrans and or hons here too
>>41052148we can with them (as their transbian gf)
>>41051478i appreciate the thought, but this is worthless
>>41047092Sin exists. That’s why. Not because God wanted you to be in pain. That is misplaced blame. If you want to be mad at anyone, be mad at satan for causing the fall of man and ushering sin into the world.Every human is infected with sin.From sin comes things like death, war, hate, murder, etc. A true loving God sent his one and only son to live the perfect life, and to die for you and your sins on a cross. And while He was on that cross, He had the capacity to look down the corridors of time, and think of you.1 Corinthians 1:18 NIV18 For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God.
>>41052218why does everyone here want to get groomed so bad, plz pair off with the annoying babydoll posters
what if you faggots got some friends? Like all of y’all are posting here you can literally link with eachother, You’re not in this alone. Buy some makeup, practice putting makeup on, Do skin care it’s EZ
>>41052324im a eurofag unfortunately :(
>>41052276its worthless to you because you dont realise that the thing thats in your way is your desperate need for things to be meaningful, and then you do things and nothing ever feels like enough, it never gets real.only when you realise the meaninglessness is the point and your real freedom do you ever get anything that is going to last. do things because they are pointless and you are free from the need for them to be more than exactly what they are, wasting time down blind alleyways until we die
>>41052215>here if they want to add detrans and or hons here tooNO>t. poster here
>>41052333first of checked. second off i’m positive there is another euro fag in here.Go get your faggot ass some makeup
>Go get your faggot ass some makeuphaha
>>41052382he was hurting and she laughed
>>41052324I'm insufferable ngl
>>41052356no fags want me desu
>>41052382jesus this is the most painful shit ever why would he agree to this
>>41035826>doesn't want to get lumped in with sissies>writes the most sissy paragraph what did this faggot mean by this
>>41052488he thought he laid it to rest but she dug six feet deep and pulled it out
>>41052452me here hidisc is 8008319 cuz lonely faggot
>>41052431>>41052488>>41052520qrd? Some chick put makeup on a repper, it didn't help him pass, and his soul started aching?
>>41052597exactly that. the guys basically a known repper having stated a lot of AGP things in the past. He almost cried in the video when he looked in the mirror
>>41052597https://youtu.be/Sjng0TSgaSI?si=jYIZcDvGU614XT6Kbrutal
yep I'm thinking it's a good night for drinking copious amounts of alcohol
>>41052713this but every nightand instead of drinking tonight, killing myself
I’m so sick of the amount of loser ass trannies there are, stand up
>>41052109Right, I get ya now
>>41052757lol ok see you tommorow>>41052712egoraptor is one of those cases where hes basically a straight guy but hes been infected by the tranny mind worms, he has no internal or external femininity, just the desire to have it. he cant/wont transition because the whole point is to be a cute anime girl femininity idol and if he tried to transition he'd just be a big ugly hon. ariel pink is similar i think. what a horrible curse
>>41052712He looks like he's in so much pain by the end of it
>>41052765I agree. these reppers need to take their pills ASAP.
>>41052765I know right, if I had gotten a chance to be a tranny I wouldn't have wasted it like so many of these retards
>>41052757I'll pour one out in your honor anon
>>41052712just realised im probably the same age that he is in this video now. he actually looks a bit better than me.its over, i ran out of time
>>41052843If I wasn't 6'4 I would've gotten on hrt a year ago. I'm so cooked.
>>41052324I have friends and family i don't want to talk to them about my troon shit
>>41052712i think he can still make it with ffs and live out his days as a graceful late transitioner tbf
>>41052324i have friends but they are not trannies or faggots they are normal
>>41052951holy fuck hes 38 here
>>41052951he was blessed with no browbone and a pretty round face, probably helps him repmeanwhile my cro magnon skull is constantly irritating
>>41052951the skull size difference is suicide fuel
>>41052819thanksalso you just described me >>41052867hope it's yummers
If you're seriously considering suicide why not try hrt and see how it'll make you feel?
>>41053021hrtrepper hereNEVER TAKE HRT>>41052764
>>41052951tbhoooooooOOOOOOOOOOOON
>>41053042ur kinda cutewanna make out and pretend we're girls
i hate myself I wish I was human
>>41053042btw i unironically have the exact same nose and browbone, lmaoooooo
>>41052095no but i am a bad person
I wish I didn't have to rep. It's so silly why do I wanna kill myself for not being born as a girl. Rationally it doesn't make sense
>>41053042would marry last one
>>41039848:p
>>41053147honestly you can stop repping when you just realise all this shit is silly, youve just been living in a fantasy world for so long you forgot what you actually are and its creating dissonance.like its not so bad, im me, i can go outside and eat a pizza, i can learn to draw, i can play an instrument. lots of things in life are just fine i just cant enjoy anything because of this retarded delusion that im supposed to not be me
>>41053042i would smash
>>41053042>NEVER TAKE HRT>looks cuteconcerning!
>>41035826fuck-off
>>41052324i have friends but they only "like" me out of pity
>>41053105if soemone told me this id prolly die
>>41053165>i can go outside and eat a pizza, i can learn to draw, i can play an instrumenti do all these things but i can never escape the fact that i am doing them as a man and not a woman
>>41053165I'm too incapable of understanding what you're trying to say and I don't mean to be rude or anything
>>41052324I had friends. Until they got partners... then all of a sudden I'm not worthy of being a friend anymore. If I knew lonely reppers by sight irl, I'd talk to every single one though, but sadly you can't just go upto lonely reppers in the park and say "hey, you wish you were a girl like me yea and thinking of hanging yourself from that tree right there? Me too, wanna hang out and stuff?"
>>41053188oWo
>>41053194its ok im just vomiting thoughts outbasically its like i objectively know theres lots of enjoyable things about life, but im cucking myself out of enjoying them because "dysphoria"like ill go meet some friends and know i should be having a great time and im not because all im thinking about is how i look, how im being percieved, how much better other people look compared to me. its bullshit
>>41053190>the fact that i am doing them as a man and not a womanThis is me when people tell me just get a boyfriend. It's not the same thing, at all.
>>41053203Im paranoid people can "see" that I rep. I have long hair, sleep deprived eyes and mannerisms of a faggot. Tfw ur just a schizophrenic
>>41053215I see I totally get it even more when there my friend gf is there and I just wish I was her and that I could date him but like I'm a dude too :(
>>41053274LMAO same my whole goal was to be a twink so i grew my hair long and just looked like a dishevelled homeless crackhead guy because i was also barely eating. i look so offputting to people but i cant do anything else
>>41053274i think most people just read it as depressed desuhad a friend tell me she was glad i looked happy in some pictures "because you never look like that". like ok dude awesome
>>41053274i've been called a repper every time i've posted myself here
lol imagine taking pictures of yourself
>>41053362literally no other way to get other people to affirm my misery
>>41053372At least my thighs pass :(
>>41053105>>41053152>>41053173wya
>>41053372my last picture of myself is from the covid era and even then i had a mask on to hide my ugly face
i think more than anything the internet did this to us, it allows you to isolate yourself without going insane, it presents to you a virtual reality you can get lost in, divorced from the social limitations of your real life. everything from being able to set your avatar on steam to an anime catgirl to being able to see different ways of living all has the effect of melting your brain so that you cant tell the difference between your own real existence and the limitations of it and all the potentials of what "could" happen. i got so lost in the potential of what i could do that i never ended up doing anything. could never be myself because it was too painful to face it, and i didnt have to face it.
>>41053486I think you've got a lot of it right there.
>>41053486I started repping before my family even had a fucking computer, I have no idea what the hell your zoomer ass is even saying.
>>41035243I should be banned from this site it would fix so much
no one can tell i rep because my eyebrows make me look angry all the time instead of depressed
>>41052287if one thinks about it sin equals self awarenessan animal doesn't sin as it doesn't know a right from a wrong, it's just natural.a duck fucking another dead duck in the ass? it's a holea dog not caring about the weakest pup letting it starve in pain? who cares
I took Bernie deep into repper country. Can he win them over?
>>41053378proof?
i hate porn so muchi hate sex too
>>41053547Lazy thigh pic I took awhile ago T_T
>>41053588bruh
>>41053588my gorilla moid brain is having its neurons activated MAKE IT STOP
>>41053588fuck you're cute, how about you come sit on my lap like a good girl?
>>41053588it's not fair
why dont reppers just get ffs?
>>41053638lose weight and epilate your legs
>>41053588most masc repper
>>41053643>$100k+
>>41053643will you pay for it
>>41053643I will and decide to transition or not based on the results
>>41053645>lose weight>still look like a man
>>41053646broad shoulders + hon height and skull :(
>>41053685that rib flare ooooooofffff
>>41053705I want to sexo you
>>41053685gain weight on hrt instead?
tfw a few mm of bone is the difference between ugly and alone forever or pretty and cute
>>41053767>tries nothing>still doesn't look that bad>complains endlesslysmartest repper
>still doesn't look that badare there any non-hugboxes left on the internet
>>41053775this + lip lift + hair transplant only $500,000 + tip
>>41053775holy fuck i will never be a womannot because im an ugly fucking moid but because im a broke peasant i will never be allowed to look at the mirror and feel anything but disgust and sadness because im simply not rich enough
>>41053821frfr I wish I could hold a job
>>41053834i wish i could get a job
>>41053785sorry i meant to say you're clearly being really rational about all of this and should just end it now
>>41053853this one just blows my mindlike yeah she kinda looks like a blow up doll now but damn, surgeons are artists
>>41053863thanks
>>41053855why can't you?
:^(
>>41053882either i apply and never get interviews or i get an interview and bomb it badly
>>41053747I'm too depressed for sex
>>41053898>where do you see yourself in five years?
>>41053520We’re humans. Not animals.We are made in God’s image.Animals are not.
sorry i hate going outside and feeling like i am disturbing to other people because of my appearance i try to tell myself its just in my head even though i can see everyone staring at me and wrinkling their faces at me sorry
>>41053912can I cuddle you then
Next thread: >>41054055
>>41053362I've never uploaded a photo of myself to the internet in my entire life
>>41053853GIWTWM