>>43009960
I love being naked

File: cute cat video.webm (2.87 MB, 800x1408)

2.87 MB WEBM

Cute cat video

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ez-FZ3yFmeU

post a funny video

i wanna cuddle after having my hole pounded. i want to fall asleep in my lover's arms.. as his semen flows within me..

>>43010014
well what you wanna do isnt necesseraly what youre gonna do

>>43010008

https://x.com/i/status/1907399688120393946

>>43010028
what am i gonna do then

>>43010055
Location?

>>43010008
>>43010041
such a prat

>>43009960
>hairless top
>hairy bottom
the asymmetry is bothering me sis.

Girls "I have cancer and herpex!" and then Boys: I think I downloadeds a virsu. And I'ms yours!

>>43010086
your mom's house

>>43010111
that's how it's like for a lot of asian guys

>>43010123
meant for >>43010088 xd

>>43010138
i mean you're not wrong either way

white gay top x asian bi bottom, married, with 2 cats
what do you think?

>>43010154
they should both add vers to their skillset

i want to be cucked by my top bf

>>43010154
the saying "when pigs fly" comes to mind

>>43009960
plyful asian dom top with big BAC bulge

>>43010154
>asian bi bottom
This describes every Asian male thoever

>>43010170
would you be okay with being whored out to other men? like your top bf invites his friends over to breed you

Wasian

>>43010194
no i said i want to be cucked

need bf

>>43010266
Location?

need slave

>>43010280
up ur ass n' around the corner

>>43010154
All I need is the chink

How come whatever people are impersonating me never post their face

>>43010266
black okay?
>>43010294
black okay?

>>43010379
love BBC

BIG FLOPPY TURGID BBC

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If someone asks what is my pronouns does it mean I'm misgendered? I only was misgendered twice and all these times is when my face is freshly shaved.

>>43010378
Oop take this outside bench. If you're going to "excuse moi" of something.

>>43010419
I ask ugly people their pronouns to insult them in a politically correct way

>>43010419
Egg posting not even joking. This is an egged butt question.

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me and rexie

>>43010419
They thought you were a tranny lol

>>43010441
What a small neck lol

a mean girls sequel that starts with dialogue like "um did you just misgender me?"

>>43010448
my hand would fit all the way around it

>>43010455
Bitch is it 2011

>>43010446
I don't look like or sound like

Abortion it really brings out the child in you

>>43010455
tina fey has an amazing quality of pointing out every flaw of the liberal mindset as part of her comedy but it doesn't undermine her libtarded beliefs one bit, she might be the realest liberal woman in all of usa in fact, a true believer

they should start making different shape light bulbs.
like stars and s shapes and triangle ones

>>43010419
They clocked you, "bro"

>>43010496
>literally me but it's Liz lemon in 30 rock
It's like she's in my head

prone bone :3

Chsnging my sniffies pfp to a meme to ensure that no one will message me ever again

Need a bottom willing to put in literally all the work while I supply the cock

>>43010516
zombah bah bah

>>43010525
sub tops be like

>>43010489
it's because you're a little girl

gosh i just wanna get fucked multiple times, maybe even all day. i have enough condoms to last a month

i always buy condoms but i never get to use them

my condoms have all expired without being used

It would take roughly 1,164 males to produce 1 gallon of cum

Short bottom looking up at you with a smug grin on his face

>>43010571
Hmm hmm, yes. Grok, what is the nutritional value of such a quantitude of cum?

>>43010566
i use them for myself, makes it easier to clean up after handsfree orgasms. if i had a bf, i'd prefer it if he takes me raw and finishes inside.

>>43010576
i take him over my knee and pull his pants down and start spanking his ass red until the smirk is gone

>>43010587
i don't use them for myself and i don't have a bf, i'm also killing myself in 3 years, good for you tho

>>43010576
i don't like bratty dudes but "confident", yeah confident is the word. that's hot.
no pleadingly looking up at your like "am i doing a good job?" rather "you know this blowjob is great"

I like younger white boys omo

>>43010608
shut up fag

>>43010602
Orphan freshie?

>>43010530
>>43010525
The amount of times I have to tell them it's okay to facefuck me. Like dude, if I was scared of choking you would know

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>>43010576

>>43010664
omo like korean/kpop 오모 (oh my)

Do you guys wash your legs i dont I just let the soap run down onto my legs

I need a slave boyfriend to wash my legs and back cause I'm too lazy to do it myself.

>>43010645
>>43010594
>>43010530
I'm there to be serviced not to do the servicing

>>43010696
I soap my pits, my balls and cack and my ass. That's pretty much it

>>43010615
>>43010594
I like both. I'd go for an 18yo but also a 40yo

>>43010728
not if you want free alcohol and lots of access to drugs

>>43010718
Yeah that's my age range too. 18-40. Wouldn't go any older than that until I'm in my 40s.

>>43010696
Yes, I have to scrub my calves very hard to get all the dirt off, typically.

>>43010756
That sounds decent. They'd never hire me at a country club and I'd feel out of place there anyway.

breed me >.<

Can you get a concussion from being gay?

squeeze me >.<

>>43010749
When I'm like 30 I might extend it up more

Remember when I said I'll be very sad if I have to wait until monday to get my package? Well guess what happened :(

my boyfriend's hands clasped over mine as he lay on top of me with his full body weight and all i can do is just squirm around and twitch. murmuring delighted sub bottom noises from beneath until falling asleep

I dont think you need to use soap as long as you use shaving cream

>>43010696
You have to scrub scrub scrub that tush honey

>>43010804
when I donkey punch you

huff huff. uwu, i'm in heat again.

Kori Del Rio

>>43010927
When im in heat my asshole produces a slime to make it easier to get me boypreggers

Have you ever sniffed a hole while rimming it? I sniff holes and it always makes my bottom jump like he doesnt expect me to be huffing his hole smell

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fitcheck

White men with brown holes > white men with pink holes
Pink holes always taste like cheese

>>43010962
You look violent with that knife not kissable and huggable at all

I thought that I knew you
I thought that you'd stay
I thought that I knew you
Better than you

>>43010977
Silly love coming here when I said go
Weigh me down

i wanna feel a guy up and make out

pink holes are like vaginas. Let me catch that rare shiny pokemon.

>>43010974
im a level 2 bandit bottom
hand over your pole now!

>>43010962
Sexo

>>43010977
awful lyrical craft that

>>43010950
I've never sniffed an asshole at all. I kinda want to though.

>>43010990
Yeah I can't really get into it if both of us aren't naked and kissing and pressing against each other feeling each other up

>>43010991
My hole is PINK but it smells like the dead raccoons i keep up there

Every white guy's butthole I've seen was pink but slightly brown

I have trust issues and can't express attraction to someone until I'm comfortable with them personally.
Am I doomed?

>>43011050
Not necessarily but you will be doomed if you settle for the wrong people and get hurt by them. So find a good guy who loves you for who you are inside and out and then pursue him as intensely as he's pursuing you.

gay sex followed by gay cuddles, while watching a gay movie with my gay boyfriend

Im always forgetting this thread is SAFE FOR WORK ONLY because you people post softcore so much

>>43010014
>>43010266
>>43010554
>>43010793
>>43010881
>>43010927
>>43010990
Posts like these make me realize how normie and basic the fags are on here.

>>43011078
Or is it just one guy posting all of these?

>>43011105
Its just one guy hes the same guy who stalks and posts college atheletes

>>43011095
this should be a place for them. you have your poppers and gloryhole gangbang sewer smelling basement parties lol

need feeder bf

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I remain dissatisfied with the quality of this general.

>>43011115
i never looked at a college athlete in my life
my favorite type of male is effeminate skinnyfat nerd

Would you still love me if I wanted to get fucked by a dog? I would never actually do it, I just want to.

Mr pancakes unthawed in my freezer because my power went out ;_;

>>43011139
too young, next

>>43011148
I HATE your art unu

it's breeding season and i'm all alone in my room, naked.
so lame

I don't like it. And I'm not going to stand for it.

im apathetic and I'm going to sit for it

>>43011201
Im not gonna take it no im not gonna take it im not gonna take it anymore

>>43011183
So open up an app and find someone

I will now sip mango juice and be mad. This will give me time to think of a reason why.

>>43011217
This is so me when Im hungry

>>43010014
Sounds nice anon :)

I'm horny and I'm going to jerk it

To this very day, there are still those who believe reporting works.

>>43010441
Cutie. Guessing the poor kid likes getting choked the way you’re treating him, but please don’t hurt him

i report to Jesus Christ my lord and savior

>>43011251
Hell yeah. What’s your guys standard infantry rifle these days?

I've had to ask Tiktok to increase the block list maximum (10,000)

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Gays will ask you to piss on them, choke them, beat them.

But point out that they are indistinguishable from autistic pre-troons and doh ho ho look out

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I sleep now.

After more mango juice. I am stuffed on shitty fast food chicken.

>>43010962
trying too hard probably old and ugly

>>43011358
ironic post

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why does furniture need to be so expensive i just want to furnish and decorate my room.

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>>43011371
because it's FURRniture

>>43011371
perhaps because you don't deserve nice things and its to remind you so you never forget

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>>43011358
dont hurt me luv smoking in the cold
getting closer to god

2 gay dads raising straight sons

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>>43011394

>>43011435
i look like that and I say that

>>43011458
you will go doo doo in the litter box like a good cat

delicate squeaks of divine fortitude

>>43011512
*STOMP*

miss that cannibal freak like you wouldn't believe

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need autistic zoomer bf

>>43011621
perfect BWC domtop material

sharp squeals of demonic surrender

>>43011458
you're fooling no one. i've seen your claws

>>43011450
My worst nightmare is having a straight son. I'd just adopt a gay son to be safe.

>>43011621
Ooof you know he clears out a bathroom hahd when the IBS-D hits!

>>43011762
but enough about you

some of y’all are mukhannath

>>43011762
I hate that you always talk about shit when people that look like you if you locked in are shown

I hate when my mum has a foot problem and asks me to look at her feet. If she were a cute twink, it wouldn't be an issue, but she's not, so it is.

>>43011808
I'm bald and walled and never getting over it.

>>43011776
I wish the drugs keep my shits inside me. Keeps the whole pink doe.

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>>43011722
i am but a harmless old man.

Mi gente pussino

i haven't had anything 2 eat since yesterday
that means i can pretty much have intercourse all day long. if i had a guy to do it with..
it would be so nice, desu. simply bend me over and slide in, anytime, any place really. it's what i'm made for, and uhhm.. on a psychological level, it feels so good when another male finds pleasure in me. like i can't stress this enough, as a submissive bottom i actually *want* to be used. if i'm not being used for pleasure then something is wrong!

>>43011128
Your expectations are too high is the thing.

what should i eat

>>43011933
Clams casino

i don't think about sex anymore
feels like freedom

>>43011965
>>43011975
well i ordered spaghette n' meatballs with french fries
daddy's hungry

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having sex is too much effort

>>43011933
eat some pizza bitch.

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boy tummy is the best

skeleton build does nothing for me

I'd like to succ dicc but then I'd have to get up ugh and go out in the cold ugh and drive for like ughhh half an ugh hour like ugh
I'll just jack off again

can i get a double gay with squeak on the side, no drink. thanks

>>43011841
I bet you eat a whole bottle of fiber gummies and make everyone else smell it.

>>43011835
You're not bald.

>>43011933
my entire ass

>>43011997
I love bellies. Skinny or pudgy or whatever. Belly buttons are fun to play with too

>>43011985
Oh shit spaghetti and meatballs was gonna be my first suggestion! Eat up big boy :D

I can't be "clocked" because I'm not trans

>>43011986
giant penis

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>I can't be "clocked" because I'm not trans

>>43012041
Same. I need some meat on those bones.

>>43012073
Okabe n next you're going to same I'm not walled neithers...

I should shave my pubes

>>43012093
I have a belly but no one plays with it

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You guys can make fun of me all you want it doesn't ruin my day.

No one hurts my feelings more then I hurt myself feelings.

>>43012124
noooo don't shave your pubes you're so sexy ahaha

>>43012162
Post pubes

I don't miss sissyspacek, you know who I miss? Bishit.

>>43012164
Don't. The bush is making a comeback.

stay out of /brit/

>>43012162
why does it seem as if you are always pinning to get made fun of? seems to be your kink

>>43012115
I was but now that you suggested it I'm not going to

>>43012090
only if i get cuddles afterwards

currently wasting away on the kitchen floor

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>>43012172
Which ones?
>>43012186
Haha ha

I'll seek you out
Flay you alive
One more word and you won't survive

>>43012179
two sides of the same tranny coin

>>43012093
Whatever happened to that anon who pulled a bloody hairball out of his bellybutton the other day?

>>43012234
I know this song

>>43012231

Post Slav squat

How tf im suppose to rewire a fuel pump. Its suppose to be replace and put back in. Not rewires

Not trying to make a big deal out of this or anything but we're heading into the evening and none of you have given me anything for my birthday yet...

>>43012289
Im in too much pain

>in relationship for almost 2 months now
>love the guy but he works all the time (60+ hours a week)
>find myself bored all the time not knowing what to do with myself
>feeling like a military housewife longing for more time with her spouse
>he's not ever going to retire or reduce his hours, at least not for another 10+ years

Should I just break up with him? I want more time with him, not just nights. I want to travel and do stuff during the day. Money is not an issue.

>>43012313
Is he off on weekends and do you have a job?

>>43012219
Make yourself useful and clean something while you're down there

I am currently in the Smoky Mountains.

I have no idea who bishit, paige, bucko, sissyspacek, cooper, blu, holden, horror, bleagle, atmos, or cersei is

>>43012336
Business or pleasure?

>>43012292
>>43012312
You try so hard

>>43012342
I'm glad you don't truly

>>43012312
I knew you weren’t a real Gopnik after all
:,(

>>43012321
he only takes one day off a week (Sunday) so it becomes a day filled with chores to prepare for next week
he never has an off mode, all he talks about is work, it's not healthy and I try to tell him this but he doesn't care

>>43012342
I miss bleagle, atmos and cersei

>>43012342
New

>>43012342
Paige is the guy who mutilates himself and posts bad art here. Bucko's that Mexican guy who doxxed himself bragging about subway. Horror was hot but he dipped soon after i got here. Idk the rest

>>43012354
And get so far. But in the end, it doesn't even matter.

marea won

>>43012342
ghosts of the past

>>43012365
Yeah idk then. If you lived together I'd say pick up some of the load but you shouldn't be cleaning the house of a 2month old relationship. I would exit now saying he doesn't have enough time to build something real

>>43012352
well its both, id like to become a travel writer, so im not being paid yet but id like to turn this into a career
my "vacations" are generally filled with driving all day, some hiking, and racing to eat and sleep at night
so it's not really a relaxed pace, and everything in the mountains is far apart
i basically haven't eaten a meal in two days
I had breakfast yesterday and then got mexican in the afternoon for dinner and the mexican food was gross and I trashed it
now ive got croissants and danishes and high quality pizza but my tummy is upset from all the doings today

>>43012313
Jesus is 2 months even a relationship yet?

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>>43012397
it's spelled mariah

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God this guy is so hot for no reason

>>43012404
That's cool. I'm p much the same. I go on roadtrips once a year and camp at dispersed sites to keep costs down. Haven't done the rockies yet. This year is either gonna be kayaking the Erie canal or roadtripping the blue mountains idk yet

Do you keep a travel journal or blog? I would imagine it's not that easy to string together enough content for an entire article

>>43011639
there's no such thing as zillenial.

>>43012184
Right then. Coming back to brit now .

>>43012442
it's bc he's white

>>43012442
intuition, he has a massive veiny cock, don't you see how much bloodflow it requires and pullsfrom his legs

>>43012306
Haaaappppyyy birthdaaaay Mister Anon… Haaaappppyyy birthdaaaay Mister Anon…

>>43012443
>I would imagine it's not that easy to string together enough content for an entire article
its actually quite easy to write a ton because I don't just focus on the basic details of the hike (how long is it how do you get there) but more the cultural elements and little things I noticed along the way, details about people, I'm more like an amateur anthropologist

I take trips at least once a month. I'm paying for a website but making it is harder than I thought. And its also a fair bit of effort to do the writeups because you have to cross-reference all the little locations to give details.

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Guys, i also dobt know anything about the thread regular or the gen culture. A round of applause for me too please

>>43012401
I've been living with him for almost 2 months now and I do clean and do most of the chores which helps him relax when he gets home. He tells me to just travel solo, like I've been doing since the new year. I thought I could turn him into my ideal travel buddy but he really just wants to stay at home when he's not at work, so boring. Even just going to a concert or outside together doesn't interest him much. He's just a homebody type who only wants to work, come home and have sex. I'm bored.

Shark bottom seeking lamprey top

>>43012430
I knew him years prior to dating and living with him. We hooked up 4 years ago and kept in contact.

>>43012472
well I could use a travel buddy...
seriously it would so nice to be able to fucking sleep after a hike and have someone else drive

>>43012469
Tbf most of them haven't been regulars for years

>>43012472
Wait you already live together??? If you're around like that then year you should do more chores during the week so you can hang on Sundays. Do you have a job? Do you have other friends? I don't understand your situation

>>43012469
did you have to post this timur creature?

>>43012469
Same. Everything I see about the thread culture makes me glad I don’t know what it means or where it came from.

I’ll applaud you, no need to reciprocate, I’m indifferent

>>43012485
Oh okay, so you do know each other already

>>43012490
I didn't know i'd be here for 2 months, I thought i'd just stay for a week, but a week became another week, and so on. I was travelling down the west coast and stopped in his city to meet him again. I don't have to work, I have money.

>>43012498
You're the kind of person i were making fun of with my post you fuckimg retard, very unontetionally funny of you to reply like this kek

>>43012510
>dating just to not have to work
foidbrained behavior

>>43012517
I think he meant he's rich and doesn't have to work

>>43012513
Word, again though very happy to not know what the thread specific stuff here is referring to, and still indifferent toward your opinion

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>>43012466
Aha. I'm more of a thing by thing guy. Idc about the people for more than a nice chat then moving on. My roadtrips are heavy on the activities but my next one I'm trying to space things out so I can get to the campsites while the sun is up. Lil scary at night when you're out and about in unknown land. Picrel was a trip down the coast to meet my family in myrtle beach

Drop the blog link?

>>43012517
I don't have to work, I sold a business i owned and made bank, and he owns his own house, 4 empty bedrooms, it wasn't a big deal, i've already bought him $20k in furniture

I'd only date part-time or unemployed men sis. Wagie men are for nesting, not romance and love.

>>43012561
That's a lot of bbq. I hope you're getting your fiber son you might get a big old dried log up there eating all that meat.

>>43012510
My guess is you can't relate to what it means to have a real job. Go flit around more until you're ready and appreciative of a quieter life. Or find friends for that outlet as you stay around. You aren't ready for him and he's not ready for you.

This is fun I feel like Wendy Williams

>>43012561
jesus that's autistic
i just have places saved on google maps and other places and I just sort of pick 2-3 of them in a day
the only set things are when you have to reserve something in advance, but that's not too common

I recommend Pizza Bones for pizza and the newly reopened Sub Rosa for the best croissants/bread/pastries (the one with local brie and pepper jam is my favorite)

>>43012566
you both sound wretched and deserve each other

>>43012581
the mountains have some REALLY GOOD bbq, and some really awful stuff, and you don't always know what you are getting into

if there's wood and smoke coming out of the restaurant, it's probably good though

>>43012586
>I recommend
in richmond va*

>>43012584
You're just jealous she's rich sis. Why work when she's already a millionaire?

>>43012601
anyone coming to 4chan to brag about having money is most likely extremely cursed in many other regards

>>43012561
timestamping the time you get to "enjoy" things is a bit much

WHERE IS YOUR SCOOTER??? WHERE IS IT

so umm. how do you like, get a bf irl

>>43012598
>you both sound wretched and deserve each other
having money sounds wretched?

>>43012603
She didn't brag though. I was bragging for her cause you're blind sis.

>>43012581
It was fine. A few days of heavy eating wasn't that bad

>>43012586
It's looser than it seems. I put together an "ideal plan" for most trips just to squeeze in everything I want to do but I don't hold myself to it. It freaks me out to try and find meals once I'm out and about. Plus since my camping sites are pretty specific it helps to plan the day out

>>43012612
by not rejecting me despite me being a total loser...
oh wait your standards are high
:(

>>43012612
Drink my piss

>>43012612
I've been entertaining men since I was born sis. It's natural born talent you're born with. Sorry you didn't inherit the right genes.

>>43012605
It's a duration. And again I don't hold myself to it but I like to be able to guesstimate when I'm getting to the dinner spot or whatever so I'm not missing their hours

If you met a wealthy guy and he wanted you to take off for a year so you can travel and spend more time together, would you?

>>43012550
Let's all acknowledge how hard this anon wants us all to know that he for real don't know anything about this gens history. That so fucking cool no? Very nonchalant and cool of you

>>43012601
His complaint is his wagiebf doesn't make enough time for it. It makes both his bf's work habits and his perspective of what's enough into valid discussion. Seems like both are wack

>>43012354
I have to let someone else take over. Orz

>>43012632
only if it's part of my plan to black widow him

>>43012632
The problem with being a wagie is that you have all these commitments that you're entangled with and it's hard to have a gap year cause the ship would sink without you.

>>43012632
A year no. A month maybe. A week sure. A weekend most def.

>>43012598
I'm too fussy about food at this point to not totally scope out online reviews and pictures to make sure I'm going to get a bad meal. It works 90% of the time for finding the best restaurants in a town I'm unfamiliar with.
>if there's wood and smoke coming out of the restaurant, it's probably good though
I love that smell too of the hickory or apple wood burning.

>>43012632
Yes but I'd want to spend more time with him closer to our home if he won't mind and see if we're compatible and love him if we do

>>43012645
Do you not feel weird wearing the skin of a more popular trip? You always had the choice to do you own thing yet here you are copying someone you probably wish you were instead

>>43011621
It's not often that i get an uncanny valley effect from an actual person

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>>43012679
cope

>>43012651
I want to make traveling my wage, I'm just not sure how.

>>43012618
>It freaks me out to try and find meals once I'm out and about.
definitely annoying, but yelp and google maps are ok, and the best is going back somewhere where you KNOW the food is good, and not having to worry.
I've had plenty of poor quality food and I try to be careful when ordering.

>I put together an "ideal plan" for most trips just to squeeze in everything I want to do but I don't hold myself to it.
I try to have a web of options and I often find the logic of which direction to go and on what day sort of congeals as I hit the road and it becomes clear how stuff relates better.

>Plus since my camping sites are pretty specific it helps to plan the day out
I rent cabins
a real mattress and a hot shower next to it is non negotiable. Its about 110-150 a night usually. Not cheap, sure, but people pay a lot more for hotels sometimes. I also get a real kitchen (though a tiny one) out of the deal.

I can't figure out how to travel, AND write and cook at the same time. Just hiking and driving is so exhausting I can't do much else.

>>43012659
bro im fussy too there's nothing worse than getting to a hotel or cabin and opening up a meal that's gross

but honestly a lot of mountain places there's just kinda nothing to eat and you make do with what you can get

I got pizza tonight its from a cool place that brews beer and uses the yeast from beermaking in the pizza dough.

>>43012656
traveling is fun for about 6-10 days and then you just get too exhausted to enjoy it
you need a break between
tho this is just my style where I race around all day to various destinations. There's often lots of places to stop at and you can't do it all in one trip but you get ideas for places to come back to.

>>43012712
Monkey, ooh ooh aah

>>43012651
I understand that, but if you knew you had nothing to worry about, that your boyfriend could pay for everything for the rest of your lives, and you never had to work again, why not take that opportunity?

My bf can retire if he wanted to, he's almost 40, and he's been in the military 20 years, if he retired he'd get like $3200/mo for the rest of his life anyway based on what I've read. It's not like he'd struggle. His house and vehicles are already paid off but still he's acting like his work is his life...which makes me want to take a sword to his heart.

>>43012746
>>43012746
>>43012746

>>43012728
I agree that generational markers are largely meaningless but im also only attracted to zoomers ha

I never expected to outlive sissyspacek

>>43012733
not to be too dramatic and say it's necessarily gonna happen in this case, but those workaholic are at high risk to break in some way or another. some because they overwork themselves down to the bone, others because they for some reason can't do their thing anymore one day and then go nuts from not having a purpose anymore (since their previous habits removed most all other purpose from their life that wasn't just "work work work".
i find it hard to fathom how one could do 6-day, 60 hour work weeks for more than a very short period of time.

>>43012819
I want him to have a mental breakdown, I think he needs it. He literally shows no emotion at all. It's bothersome.

>>43010950
I have done this a few times just for the fuck of it, not even while rimming. I was hiking with one guy and we started streaking. I started sniffing his armpits and getting super hard over it. He started teasing me. I was like "I really want to sniff your hole." This guy worked a blue collar job and I guess hadn't really showered that day. He was like "No you don't" and I was like "Yes I fucking do." He bent over and got down on all fours, looked back at me and said "Don't fucking do it. Seriously. You'll regret it."

I did it anyway. I got fucking BOMBED. It smelled like something that would've been used as a chemical weapon in the Vietnam War. I gagged.

Usually I get really turned on though by smelling a dude's pits/balls/hole.