>>43067551
this asshole >>43044890 forgot to include it in the subject

>>43067556
oh, i searched the catalog and didn't find one, and these threads have been dead forever
saw a thread a few weeks ago, where people were asking about it, so i just figured that i would make one today

>>43067551
Hi old friend.
It's J.
I'm glad that you're still alive.

>>43067551
>qott: how have you all been?
I want to kms and everyone thinks that we aren't real or just lying, either that or they tell me I'm a whore.
How do you all deal with this?

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>>43067724
thanks lol, i fell asleep

>>43067861
>How do you all deal with this?
the way i deal with it is by accepting that other people will always judge you, but to be honest with them and yourself
some people are just sluts and give us that reputation, there's nothing wrong with that but personally ive always been the more modest type sexually or at least monogamous
poly works for some of us
if you have like specific questions, i can maybe help, goes for anyone lurking too

>>43067551
Hello keyword searchable bigen thread lol
>qott: how have you all been?
I’m doing well. Enjoying some quiet time in my freelance schedule before I get busy again next month.

>>43067861
I’m sorry it’s got you down this much :( I was a little hurt and disappointed when I found out how much a lot of other lgbt people dislike bisexuals, but it didn’t get me down that much. If it makes you feel any better all of the letter gen threads seem to rabidly hate each other, so it’s not like we’re unique lol

When I first started seeing my super gay boyfriend he wasn't sure I was serious because I'm bi, which is nice. When he found out I'd told my parents about him he was astonished

>>43070554
cute, i assume your family is cool with it?
how long have you been with him?

>>43070554
>When he found out I'd told my parents about him he was astonished

Aw that’s cute :) was that enough to convince him you like boys, or does he still think you’re going to run off with the first robust woman who looks like she could bear you healthy offspring?

>>43070586
Yeah everyone is cool, even my dad awkwardly asks me how things are going occasionally lol
We've only been officially a thing since Christmas but were seeing each other on a casual basis since July. He's so cute guys I don't know how I managed to get together with him

>>43070596
I think he was worried about that but I hope he trusts me now.

I missed you bitgen

Don't know if anyone form the covid days is here but I was in bigen like it was a strip club all day everyday

God the Capotcha are so bad now

>>43070602
that's awesome
i hope things continue to go well for you two
were you always more into guys, or have you been all over the place?

>>43070650
i was around back then hi fren

>>43070665
I always had more romantic interest in dudes but was never quite brave enough to do anything about it when I was younger. Ended up with a woman for 12 years then started seeing guys after I got divorced. Women are pretty, sure, but so are men and I'm finding being with a guy easier, like there was a persistent anxiety I had with women that I don't have in this relationship

>>43070637

I mean it is the one anxiety gays and lesbians have about us that I can really empathize with. I’m glad telling your family about him helped reassure him that you’re serious. Congrats on finding yourself a cute boyfriend, it sounds like you both really care about each other :)

>>43070721
Thanks anon, life is good :)

>>43067551
Do you think bi people can love trannies for who they are? Even if they are non-passing?

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>>43071732
my last girlfriend was trans, and i loved her a lot
i like to think we are more accepting than other gays with this, but it just depends on the person
for me, i can appreciate both masc and fem aspects of the person and tend to be more into personality and if we get along well
you deserve to be loved for who you are

>>43071787
This is so sweet, thank you.
Hopefuel.

>>43071829
you're welcome, i will try to keep the thread alive for questions like this
it can get a bit complicated with families being accepting, but love yourself more than anything else would be my advice
i hope you can be happy with your body, and sense of self, and be kind to yourself

With spring comes less thoughts about being alone, hopefully.

>>43070650
I am always here...

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>>43072028
how long have you been alone? or maybe rather struggled with thoughts of lonliness?

>>43070650
Just got back, too. Welcome.

>>43072191
>>43072191
Nobody was keeping /bigen/ up I just happened
to check today and saw it was up

>>43072332
Damn. Just in time, then.

>>43072363
Yeah also form what I've head all (most) of the jannies quit so hate and full frontal can be found in /lgbt/

>>43072332
i will try to make them when im around, i do miss the old threads

>>43072419
You're the king and or queen

>>43072396
No kidding? Well, that explains a thing or two. Not sure how often I'll be coming back but it's good to know there's some people kicking around here now and again.

>>43071732
I’ve never dated a trans person, but I find plenty of them attractive, passing or otherwise. I feel reasonably confident my attitude toward dating someone trans in practice would be about the same as this anon’s >>43071787

I generally make an effort to take people on whatever terms they prefer for themselves (this isn’t just a gender thing, I try to call people by whatever name or nickname they prefer).

The only thing that I think might be a problem for me dating a trans person would be if I liked some feature of theirs they disliked because they associate it with whatever gender they’re trying to get away from. I like plenty of things about men and women, and I could imagine that not lining up well with how a trans person sees themselves.

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>>43072461
oh im a guy, and have been in all kinds of relationships with cis men, women and trans people
i tend to prefer fem types, but it depends on the person, some masc guys are hot as fuck

>>43072555
>I like plenty of things about men and women, and I could imagine that not lining up well with how a trans person sees themselves.
can be a bit delicate to navigate, but so long as you are nice and respectful it's typically fine

>>43072600
>i tend to prefer fem types, but it depends on the person, some masc guys are hot as fuck
my type is Femboys for men and Tomboys for Women

>>43067551
I love androgyny in both genders

>>43072806
Good to know, thanks! :) I’ll keep it in mind if I ever end up dating someone trans.

>>43073038
Not exclusively, but same

when did you all figure out that you were bi? did it happen when you were younger or older? what was the major signal for you?

>>43073132
Cis male here, figured it out in college. Realized I had a thing for my roommate, although it took a while to recognize/admit that’s what was going on. Once I got comfortable with the idea I was bi I pretty quickly started noticing a pop physical and emotional attraction for guys similar to what I already knew I had for women. It took that first crush to unlock things for me though

>>43073132
I've know without knowing form like age 14 (I even tried to stick a small screw driver handle in my butt at like at 12) but didn't come to term with it until I was 18-19

Other things are "Think of what boys I would like if I was gay" and not wanting to watch gay porn in case I liked it witch would make me gay

>>43073201
Sorry, don’t know how pop made it into that sentence lol. Once I was comfortable with the idea of liking guys I started noticing them and being attracted to them in basically the same way I already was with women

Truns out some of bigen is here they just didn't label it

>>43044890

>>43073132
I had crushes on boys in primary school and was absolutely obsessed with one guy all through hs. I liked girls too but I couldn't look this guy in the face or speak properly around him lol

>>43073961
cuuute

>>43074048
Yeah well he and his friends performed a short sketch in English class about how much of an unlikeable freak I was so that didn't go great
I mean I was a weird little autist but they didn't have to skewer me through the medium of theatre

>>43074062
> they didn't have to skewer me through the medium of theatre
Everyone’s a critic.

Jk, getting bullied by a crush must really suck. Kind of glad I didn’t figure out I like boys until I was past the age when that’s a common experience. I got bullied enough without the added zest of wanting to make out with my antagonizers lol

>>43073925
It was me. I didn't label it
I fucked up the captcha and 4chan deleted my entire post so I quickly rewrote the qott and posted without thinking of the subject

>>43076116
You’re still a good, honest, and hard working bisexual to me anon <3

>>43076210
Much love <3

Goodnight bigen, have a good weekend

>>43076875
gn, you as well anon!!

>>43073088
Yeah it's not exclusively for me either

bi friends, who was your first "wow this is kinda gay" crush? can be anime, cartoons, real life whatever

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>>43078817
The first male character I remember having a homoerotic response to was this kangaroo who’s in a short scene in Rescuers Down Under. I was probably around 5-6 at the time, had no real concept of what sex was, and wouldn’t figure out I was bi for another 15ish years. I just remember having a vague sense of yearning in the pit of my stomach similar to how I felt about certain female characters in kids media I had seen. The kangaroo was presented as male, and was voiced by a guy with a hot voice. I definitely understood him to be a male character, and had some nebulous sense of arousal toward him. I suspect other people must have experienced similar feelings toward him, considering how easy it was to find screenshots of an otherwise very minor character from a 36 year old kids movie. xD

I swear I’m not a furry in any meaningful sense, although I have jerked off to furry porn plenty of times in my life lol

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tfw wanna get buttfucked and cuddled by men, but I don't really go outside and random hookup culture scares me.Being buttfucked by women is nice, but not the same desu.
I wanna be craved by men without being annoyed by STDs and prep shit. So doing it through camwhore ways like fetlife and blowers. Which is retarded, but fills the gap.
Being a bear with sub tendencies is a chore tbg. The age of femboying was great. Still, I do prefer myself as I am nowadays. At the very least I can bench 325 lbs.
Any advices? :c
God almighty, new captcha is awful.

>>43080308
Perhaps you can look online and try to find a guy in a similar situation.

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hi bigen what's up

>>43080506
Waking up earlier than I was hoping to. Gonna go for a run, walk the dog, have coffee and breakfast, then attend my local No Kings protest in the afternoon. Probably play a board game with my gf in the evening.

How about you?

>>43079993
reminds me of my one friend that's not a furry, but had horny thoughts about the bunny girls in ff lol

>>43080308
avoid grindr, meet guys elsewhere is my advice
>desperate hot bears in your area want YOU to top them

>>43080506
gm

>>43081741
>horny thoughts about the bunny girls in ff

Oh sure, I know the ones you’re talking about. I think a lot of people are probably into them- they’re mostly just anime girl cheesecake with bunny ears lol

I had a friend who was actually a furry. He spent a lot of time on second life, and said one of the things he liked about it was the opportunity to explore gender fluidity. I honestly thought this was kind of a compelling reason to be into furry stuff; but every time I imagined having a fursona or doing any of the rest of the furry stuff myself I died of embarrassment. The whole thing is painfully dorky to me. My friend also said he felt uncomfortable in his own skin (he later transitioned) and that’s just not the case for me. I like my body and appearance generally, I’ve never felt any need to escape it. That said I’ve got no problem with people who get something out of furry stuff, and it was interesting to get an insider look at the community via my friend.

>>43082426
>second life
the og gooner game
think most of them migrated to like vrchat these days

>>43082534
lol yeah this was years ago. I lost touch with him a while back, way before he transitioned. Not sure if he’s even still doing furry stuff. Transitioning may have scratched whatever itch it was that got them into being a furry.

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bump
what are you all up to this weekend? any fun plans?

>>43084841
My bf is leaving on a 3 night trip with a few friends tomorrow morning so I'm going to make sure he walks to the car funny

>>43084841
Basically on track with my stated plans from the morning- ran, walked the dog, went a No Kings protest, gonna play board games with my gf. There was a good turnout at the rally- lots of rainbow flags which is always nice. The first speaker was a trans highschooler, she gave a really encouraging speech. Nice to hear a young queer person stand up for herself and express hope for the future.

>>43084841
I plan to masturbate and paint Warhammer minis

>>43086003
lol awesome. What army? I played Dark Eldar and Traitor Guard years ago.

What if you mixed a little bit of your cum into one of the paints, and then used it on your minis??

>>43086003
same, but vidya desu

>>43086044
Wood elves in The Old World. The coom is the varnish.

>>43086190
>Wood elves in The Old World

Ooh Old World, an anon of taste and refinement! I’m excited GW is doing something with Fantasy Battles. I wish they used an adaptation of one of the older magic systems though, I really don’t like the one they came up with for this edition.

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DON’T YOU DIE ON ME BIGEN!!

>>43088486
>check /lgbt/ letters poll up on the board
>largest demographic is bi users
curious

Bi pendulum swung so hard to the gay side I’ve only been masturbaiting to the dick pics I get from hung muscular guys sent on grinder

>>43088501
They’re all just too modest and considerate of the other letters gen threads. They know if they all posted in here the other threads would develop a damaging inferiority complex. B doesn’t want to hurt the LGT, so we keep a low profile

>>43088520
Nice anon. Sounds like those big dongs must be swinging like the pendulum

>>43088539
i like to think of us like trying to herd cats

>>43067551
we need a pangen. bigen is for transphobic bigots

>>43089175
>herding cats
That seems apt. We even made two bigen threads by accident, so orginzation is clearly not our strong suit kek.

>>43091178
You’re welcome to make your own thread if this one hurts your feelings, but the times I’ve seen trans people mentioned in recent bigen threads it’s almost always been in neutral or positive terms.

>>43091297
you guys wouldn't even break up with your gf if she came out as trans. you don't see them as real women

>>43091301
That’s nice. Go make pangen now. Door’s that way- shoo!

For any other trans person potentially reading this, you’re welcome here as far as I’m concerned. This person obviously just wants to pick a fight.

>>43091351
>trans person
notice how he didn't say trans woman

>>43073204
>not wanting to watch gay porn in case I liked it witch would make me gay

Omg I feel so seen.

>>43073132
That's basically me until last year, although it took me till my mid 20s to realize I'm bi.

Been a year and still haven't actually gotten with a guy though.
I'm kinda nervous about it, since I'm a virgin in that regard.
Also kinda feel bad about treating somebody a bit like an experiment. Then again, every first few dates is kind of an experiment.
Also don't really feel comfortable going to LGBT events because I never really faced the same discrimination openly gay couples faced, so it seems like apps would be the only real way to know the other person is also interested in men.

I might be overthinking this, anybody else face something similar and how'd you overcome it?

I still have never had sex without paying for it.

Too ugly for women, and too boring for men.

>>43084841
Lying in bed next to sleeping boyfriend :)

>>43091572
>assumes I’m a man
>assumes “trans person” is just a willful exclusion of “trans woman” and not an acknowledgement of other varieties of trans people
Any time you feel like making a crybaby general thread is fine by me. To be clear though, yes I am personally fine with trans women posting here.

>>43091710
Cute :)

>>43091709
Sorry anon. Hope you find a partner if that’s what you want

>>43091748
I just want to be validated as a human being

>>43091752
You're valid as a human being regardless <3

I understand feeling anxious about it, but it's really not such a big deal

>>43091696
>Also don't really feel comfortable going to LGBT events because I never really faced the same discrimination openly gay couples faced
I kept quiet about being bi for a long time for similar reasons. It felt like stolen valor to make a big deal about it when other people face very real consequences for their sexual and gender identities. I still basically feel that way, but I realized I wasn’t presenting myself honestly after a certain point. I’m a cis guy, but a lot of my mannerisms are kind of feminine, and my preferred clothing styles for myself are colorful and I imagine read as queer to most people. I try not to make a big deal about myself in general, but I’ve allowed myself to lean into these tendencies more. I think the cumulative effect of these signals is that when people meet me they’re less likely to assume I’m straight, which is basically all I want to be projecting lol

>>43091752
Sorry, seconding the other anon about you already being valid as a human. Hope you do find someone who’s attracted to you for who you are though

>>43078817
off the top of my head, andy biersack, the ex boy friend in lil dicky's ex-boyfriend music video, guts from berserk, noel fielding

of course I didn't understand at the time that what I was feeling was gay lol

>>43091967
You had an early gay crush on Guts but not Griffith? You really do like dudes don’t you ;p

Bigen I just want to be loved

The one BF I've had we didn't even hold hands the first one time I saw him IRL (He was unironically a discord BF) I just want to feel wanted by someone who isn't supposed to because family someone who loves and cares about me for who i am

>>43091967
>>43092050
Don’t get me wrong they’re both hot, Griffith is just a much more obvious gateway drug into bi dudes realizing they like other dudes, since Miura basically drew him as pretty woman with a penis

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>bf had a trip planned this weekend for his birthday with a few of his friends
>Was originally looking forward to the few days to myself. Able to game without him trying to get me to log off so we could spend time together, able to eat some foods I haven't in awhile because he doesn't like them, etc.
>He left 30min ago and now I actually really sad I won't see him for a few days
Funny how that works
Idk how people have relationships where they don't see the other person for weeks or even months on end

>>43092066
Sorry NBG, hope things work out better with the next SO <3

>>43092136
I have a friend whose dad is a freight ship captain. He’d be at home for 6 months straight, and then at sea for 6 months straight. Can’t imagine being married to someone with that schedule, but it seems like it worked out for my friend’s parents

>>43092050
>>43092125
I actually don't prefer feminine boys that much (though there are exceptions of course).. it's a role I'd probably prefer to fill myself lol
griffith is hot too, but it's more like
I'd prefer to be him

>>43092066
I recently got out of a relationship like that as well.. it sucks feeling like an idiot for wanting to hug or kiss or cuddle or something, like they are doing it out of obligation... never initiating anything themselves
pretty much only once they came up and kissed me spontaneously, and it made me feel so nice
how sad is that

fuck that, if future partners are going to make me feel unwanted, I'm jumping ship immediately

>>43092175
Funnily enough I have an easier time with him being gone for work than for leisure
My bf travels (locally) for work and sometimes has 12+h work days
He leaves before I get up and gets home when I'm nearly ready for bed
If I were to put my thoughts down I guess it would be because I know that work isn't fun and coming home to me is a relief for him
Part of me is afraid that coming home and seeing me after a trip with his friends will be more of a unpleasant snap back to reality rather than a relief
But I need to realize that these thoughts are just me being anxious rather than real and I'm sure he'll miss me terribly after a couple of days

>>43067551
>qott
Finally started therapy after realizing I was one drunken impulse away from blowing my brains out. It may be helping or I may be distracting myself.
>>43080308
No advice, but I sympathize. I feel like if I was born 10 years later I probably would have gone twink to tranny instead of twink to jock. Not bc I dont like being a man generally, but bc the overwhelming expectation is that a man with muscles is the one on top. Meanwhile I just want to be wanted and (aggressively) topped.

All of my serious relationships (with women) eventually fizzle out into a dead bedroom because no matter how dominant they say they are at the outset, or how clearly I communicate that Ill take the submissive role, and no matter how much we may stick to that outside the bedroom, in bed it becomes that meme of two sexually frustrated bottoms without a top around to get them off.

>>43092199
>griffith is hot too, but it's more like
I'd prefer to be him
Valid take!

>fuck that, if future partners are going to make me feel unwanted, I'm jumping ship immediately

I’ve never been in a relationship where there’s been an appreciable difference in how affectionate either person is. I don’t think I could deal with that, I’m pretty cuddly by nature

>>43092252
Yeah people being gone on work trips definitely feels different than them being on vacation. I’m sorry you’re having intrusive thoughts about him feeling disappointed coming home to you :( I hope you don’t spend too much time fixating on that. Just try to enjoy some time to yourself like you’d been planning

>>43092312
Glad you’re taking care of yourself anon, that’s great you recognized you need help and took steps toward getting it

>>43092066
While online-first or discord seems like it would be the ideal place to meet someone who "knows you for you" (plus you don't have to go outside), it's not actually true.
It's like reading the sparknotes/wikipedia plot summary of a book/movie and trying to determine if it's your favorite book/movie from that. You can weed out stuff that's super obviously bad, you can get a hint that you might like it, but you need to actually consume it to find out.

>tfw my best friend is engaged and has a baby on the way
>one of my work colleagues who’s the same age as me is pregnant
>meanwhile, I’m still a virgin and feel like I have a rough time connecting with people because I’m naturally reclusive

On the one hand, I really want a loving relationship and a family, but on the other hand, I like my privacy and my own company. I hate trying to resolve this, especially since my only relationships have been long distance and have never worked out.

>>43092565
Ty anon. Its been weird so far... im dealing with a lot of shit in my relationship and I went into therapy thinking I would get some ways to reframe the issues and find out how I could be doing better and instead its been a lot of "yeah it sounds like youre doing everything you can... have you considered ending it bc this sounds co-dependent and unhealthy"

So thats been fun. But venting about it to someone at least eases the stress in the short term. And a bigger part of me than Id like to admit kind of enjoys feeling used. Even if its not in the bedroom its still something.
>>43092704
In a healthy relationship you'll want to expand your boundaries to include the other person. Thats not to say you'll give up privacy altogether but itll be less intrinsic to who you are.

>>43091967
>guts from berserk
ur so based for this

>>43092066
>The one BF I've had we didn't even hold hands the first one time I saw him IRL
grim
what the hell

>>43067551
>qott: how have you all been?
No so good, boss. World's bad and getting worse all the time. Dear end job. I have a partner who I love but I don't see our lives getting any easier.

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>>43067551
>go to a normal bar
>constantly get hit on by women
>not trying to sound braggadocious or whatever just the way it is
>get that's part of life and everything, most people are going to assume you're straight until stated otherwise
>but go to gay bars
>ngl usually dress in what makes me comfortable
>football jerseys, wife beater, jeans, that kind of thing
>don't have the gay voice or anything
>but still get absolutely nothing
>was trying to hit on this qt twink and his fugly faghag friend starts hitting on me
>politely ignore her
>eventually guy gives me his number, but says that he didn't think i was gay and just thought i was being friendly
Surely if I'm at a gay bar you can assume right? Like what gives anons? Is there a way I can be more faggy or something? Or do I just suck at flirting?

>>43093049
You can't assume nowadays
Even gay bars are infested with straights
There are even women on Grindr now

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>>43093049
> Is there a way I can be more faggy or something?
Kek you must come off as pretty fucking straight if you can go into a gay bar, hit on a gay man, and he assumes you’re just being neighborly xD

Maybe try switching up your wardrobe? Lose the sports jersey and try something like this.

Seriously though, a different outfit when you’re trying to pick up guys would probably go a long way. I’m not sure what clothing reads as gay top coded, people on gay gen might have better input in that regard. There are probably options you’d feel comfortable and authentically yourself in that would still give the appropriate signals to guys letting them know you’re in play.

>>43092891
That’s gotta be helpful to get an outside perspective letting you know you’re doing the right things as far as trying to make the relationship work is concerned. You could drive yourself crazy trying to figure out who’s in the right in situations like that. Any idea what you wanna do with that?

>>43093046
Sorry anon, glad you’ve got your partner anyway. gl to both of you <3

>>43093206
Yeah i get straight women, but how many straight men are going to gay bars?
>>43093210
I kind of like loose comfortable clothing, but i'm not against showing skin, like would wear a crop top which is faggy right? idk maybe a rainbow bracelet or something?
also, kek, last resort i'll give the shirt a go hahaha
i suck at flirting, but I wasn't subtle, literally told him i thought he had pretty eyes lmfao

>>43093293
>idk maybe a rainbow bracelet or something?
I think this is easily the best way to go about it - wearing something with a rainbow on it makes it obvious without having to change your style or personality

>>43093293
Rainbow bracelet is a great idea actually, that would probably clear up most of this. That’s hilarious complimenting his eyes didn’t even convince him you aren’t straight hahaha

I think it might be worth playing with your style a bit anyway. It could help send a clearer message, and you might even have fun with it.

I really don’t have any advice on specifics though. I’m an artist and like dressing like a vaguely fruity art dork. Most of the people I spend time with and am attracted to are roughly similar. Like I said gay gen might be able to give you some better advice- there are a lot of manly dudes and admirers of manly dudes there.

>>43093049
like others said they prob just assume u are straight lol
not that uncommon for straight dudes to go to gay bars with friends

>>43093020
neither of us knew what we were doing for the entire 9 month relationship

>>43092629
the relationship was a mixed bag it was the first time dating for both of us and I was also starting to feel that it wasn't working, the reason I'm still hurt is how he handled the breakup
>BF: I don't feel the same way anymore but I would like to stay friends
>Me: Alright
>Me: Want to play vida?
>BF: No and I think we should peacefully coexist instead of actively trying to do stuff together

>>43093293
>>43093470
>>43093568
thanks anons, rainbow bracelet it is
failing that just going to slut it up and just wear as little as possible, can't deal with this shit anymore
>>43093642
fair but if a guy is at a gay bar sorry i'm assuming he's fair game until he says he's straight

>>43093254
>Any idea what you wanna do with that?
Idunno anon. Im trying to build systems that meet both our needs, but even these feel like an 80/20 split in division of labor... like Im the one deeply unhappy with a lot of things yet Im also the one going to therapy and making the effort to be a partner that can accommodate more of her issues.
On the one hand its exhausting and writing it out like this I can tell that if anyone else was in my situation Id tell them to GTFO but... idk... I dont wanna disappoint her or upset her by leaving. On the other its been making my attraction to men skyrocket, probably as an escape valve. I have this stupid fucking fantasy that if I leave her I can find a big strong himbo to take care of me and appreciate the work I do in homemaking and stuff. Someone who can take care of me when I feel upset and exhausted and not someone I have to walk on eggshells around for fear of upsetting.

Like when I told my therapist I cant see myself having kids with her in good conscience she just hit me with the most "well theres your answer you retarded pussy" stare...

>>43093787
Gl! Post a fit check if you slut it up. I’m curious to see what you’d come up with for that. I still think you might have fun playing with how you present yourself sometime

Bumpin'

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>>43093708
9 months is a long time to be in that strange limbo with someone

>>43093210
id wear this shirt lol

>>43096031
we were actually unofficial for few months but weren't BF/GF until a few months later so I spent around 11 months with him

>>43093916
>On the one hand its exhausting and writing it out like this I can tell that if anyone else was in my situation Id tell them to GTFO but... idk... I dont wanna disappoint her or upset her by leaving. On the other its been making my attraction to men skyrocket, probably as an escape valve. I have this stupid fucking fantasy that if I leave her I can find a big strong himbo to take care of me and appreciate the work I do in homemaking and stuff. Someone who can take care of me when I feel upset and exhausted and not someone I have to walk on eggshells around for fear of upsetting.

Kek I’m in almost this exact situation with the same fantasy. Your relationship sounds like it’s in worse shape than mine though… my gf was about as dysfunctional as it sounds like your’s is currently. She’s settled down a decent amount, and the day to day isn’t as rough as it had been. I’m feeling pretty damn burnt out on the relationship though, even if the worst of it is in the past. And yes a nice Himbo to hold me at night is also what I’m dreaming of as a cure xD

I guess if I had anything to offer, it would be to consider leaving on the basis that even if stuff gets better you might be sick of the relationship at that point due to burnout.

>>43096471
i hope you meet someone that loves you and wants to hold your hand, friend

Spent the last couple of days staying with the bf and now I'm on my own watching YouTube videos about cruise ships :/

>>43096689
Thanks, i was hoping i would meet someone when i went back to college but that hasn't been successful

There is this girl I have a crush on but she's a senior and we have zero classes together this semester, it is what it is, all I really want right now are strong platonic friendships with people

>>43093049
Last time I hit up the local gay bar I also literally only got hit on by women. I guess they're just looking for bi guys or the token gay guy for their girlfriends group?

>>43093293
They follow the straight women

>>43093049
>>43096889
I am bi (obviously lol) and I think both straight/bi women and gay/bi men can tell when you're attracted to them. This has affected two areas:
1. Like you guys, I have been chatted up by women at gay bars when I went by myself. One I scheduled a date (although I ended up canceling for reasons unrelated to her in particular), one I actually told one I was really looking to experiment with guys and she introduced me to her friend and we made out and went back to his place lol.
2. Guys will flirt with me in non-gay spaces sometimes.

But I also think, especially earlier on in your bi journey, you may give off signals that you're not fully comfortable in a gay space, which can be offputting to gay guys there who are comfortable, while neutral/unnoticed to women who are there.

>>43097457
I'm retarded then because I'm a bi women and never can tell when people are attracted to me

>>43097512
just get a lot of mixed signals? or are you helen keller mode and hopeless

>>43097606
I have very low self esteem and assume no one is ever attracted to me or trying to flirt with me.

>>43097714
how come?
im sure someone likes you, or finds you attractive?

>>43097714
That's gonna turn into a self-fulfilling prophecy if you don't address it

What games have you been playing bigen?

I've been playing a mix of Pokemon crystal clear and Mewgenics

OMG Mewgenics is so good I've almost been late to class due to playing it some much

Anybody want to have kids at some point?

I'm attracted to both genders but this sort of makes me lean opposite gender for long-term relationships.

I realize I'm not helping stereotypes, but wanted to know how you deal with this.

I guess surrogates or adoption are also possibilities

>>43099039
Fuck's sake man you're not helping

>>43097822
Someone with the same problem, this is typically a result of childhood rejection trauma and it can be caused by either peer or parental neglect. In my case, I had been socially ostracized since preschool (I also grew up not-so-high functioning autistic) and was never able to fit in with people my age, at any age. Even if I conciously know it to be untrue, my mind still automatically believes that my mere presence is annoying or disgusting to others, and it forms a kind of pressure that makes me extremely uncomfortable in social situations and prone to social faux pas, making it even worse.

>>43098837
played a lot of slay the spire 2 the past few weeks
mewgenics is great

>>43098837
Nice, I haven’t played Pokémon since Gold and Silver edition. I did Pokémon Go for a while which was fun, but it’s definitely not the same.

I’m not really into video games at all at this point- I stopped playing 10+ years ago because they were taking up too much of my time. Main gaming stuff I do these days is Wingspan with my partner, d&d occasionally with friends, and then watching warhammer battle reports and MTG streams. I try to save the last two for garbage to put on while on the treadmill

>>43099039
Yeah, I am engaged and we plan to have kids. It's one of the reasons I only date women, even if I enjoy having more varieties of FWB

>>43098837
I dont really have time for vidya anymore. When I can, I squeeze in some EO though

>>43099039
Nah, not at this point. I’m in my mid 30’s and would have to change up a lot about my life quickly to feel like I could be a decent parent. I’ve been open to the idea of kids, but it was never a priority. My sister has two kids, which honestly makes me feel better about not having any of my own. The family line continues lol, and my parents get to have grandchildren.

>>43099581
Pokemon crystal clear is a ROM hack that makes Gen2 open world, I haven't played Gen2 outside of heart gold when I was like 9 and I like it

anyway GN Bigen I have class tomorrow so can't just stay up like I used to

>>43099950
Nice, I should watch a play through of one of recent games just to see how much they’ve changed.

Goodnight, hope you’re well rested for class tomorrow :)

>>43098837
My cousin got me to start Pokemon Yellow Legacy and it's soo goood

The goal is to be the "definitive gen 1 experience" and it is delivering. Keeps all the charm and mechanics of RBY with fixed glitches, better battles and better pokemon/move distribution. I'm barely past Misty and I already wanna do another run after this.

Also the bi cycle is so real

>>43099039
I want kids so bad but finding the right partner is my biggest issue. I'm waiting for my ex to grow up a bit, but she has a ton of mental baggage. Failing her, idk. My bi cycle is a force and I might be too troonish for most women. I wish I could just get pregnant myself.

>>43100065
Hope you get to have kids someday <3

Goodnight bigen, sweet dreams to you all

>>43099039
The fact I want kids makes being bi feel quite pointless to me, since I prefer women for that reason. It makes me feel guilty when I get horny for men, which just exacerbates my choice paralysis when it comes to seeking relationships.

If men could get pregnant or if I could, it would solve so many issues.

>inb4 surrogacy

It just doesn’t feel the same. The pregnancy is part of the experience too.

>>43101346
>>43099039
Yeah you two probably shouldn’t pursue serious relationships with same sex partners if pregnancy and children are a high priority for you.

>>43072176
Since 2013.
>>43098837
I've been playing more baldr sky and blue reflection tie.
>>43099039
>I guess surrogates or adoption are also possibilities
They are unbelievably expensive. Adoption for someone outside out the US is significantly cheaper.
>>43097714
Same, I assume they are desperate, making fun of me, or will immediately lose interest.

I was absolutely certain I was gross until I decided to start believing the bullshit people say on Grindr to get you to have sex with them and the confidence boost actually helped

>>43082534
>Vrchat
I fixed the ebay vr headset but I'm too socially anxious to actually use it for vrchat.

>>43103081
Similar experience for me with Tinder - I know the distributions of men vs women is incredibly skewed, that women are more picky on average etc. but I still wondered if I might just be ugly, until I switched on the option for both men and women and the floodgates just opened lmao

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>>43103081
I had a similar experience
I was a KHV all through highschool and college and had an obsession with finding someone naturally through clubs and social events. Never happened
After I graduated, I downloaded all the dating apps and started matching
Tinder and hinge got me a few dates but nothing more than that. Grindr got me laid. Just the experience of someone wanting to be with me gained me the confidence I needed to start dating successfully
Ironically my bf and I met on Grindr and we've been together for a bit over 2 years now

>>43103278
Hi-five fellow grindr boyfriend finder

>>43092427
also cuddly by nature
I only dealt with it because I knew they were a bit inexperienced in terms of relationships so I wanted to give them time and be understanding
but at some point it just felt like we were friends on linkedin

>>43092704
a platonic girl friend that I knew many years recently wrote me after a few years that she just had her second son..
I remember being 18 and drinking beers in these shitty late teen drunk hangouts
meanwhile I'm almost 30 and still a child....

>>43092906
<3

>>43103081
you should believe it

>>43093210
Another shirt, “Let go of my ears. I know what I’m doing.”

>>43098043
Yeah it already has, but I dunno how to address it

>>43097822
Past experience and trauma from childhood. I don't trust people and was bullied pretty heavily as a kid. If a stranger approaches me, my gut instinct is that they have cruel intentions.

>>43099039
No kids for me. I'd be a terrible parent.

Sometimes family just knows what to say and it hits harder than advice from anyone else
My brother and I had a discussion about my bf being out of town for a few days and the best way to handle the feelings of not only missing your partner but also sort of wishing you could be with them and the simplest advice is sometimes the best
"You just need to get used to it"

Live with wife & adult daughter. Dildos have been my only physical sexual contacts for 15 years or so, but they’re reliable and attractive enough, it seams.

>>43105156
Yeah for certain things you really do just need to toughen up and get through it. I imagine your bf will appreciate that you missed him though

>>43104935
That was decent of you to be understanding about their lack of relationship experience. But yeah once a partner just starts feeling like a roommate it’s probably time to move on.

>>43105104
Kek

>>43105217
You and your wife aren’t sexually active, it’s just the dildos? Are you okay with that arrangement?

>>43105233
We've been on the phone at least once a day for a few min so I know he still misses me and is thinking about me
It's definitely an unfounded anxiety
I need to work on myself
I think it stems from not only missing him but also some jealousy. He seems to be having a lot of fun and I don't think I'll ever be able to experience what he is. All my friends are out of town so we don't go on trips together. More just get together when enough of us are back
The only friend I have that would go on a road trip like that with me is him

>>43105349
Have you guys gone on a road trip together? That sounds really fun!

I have more local friends than my gf. I wouldn’t say she’s jealous, but I think she wishes she had more people she felt comfortable hanging out with. I do put more effort into maintaining my friendships than she does though- you do need to show up and put a little work in if you want them to last.

>>43105217
That is so sad and my greatest fear

>>43105156
I'm sorry but why is this a revelation to you?

Sometimes you're sad and there's nothing you can do. Sometimes we have to put up with disfavourable conditions and there's no immediate fix. Is this the first time you had to tolerate being away from someone you love?

>>43103081
I wish I was a man or a tranny for this reason

>>43105600
We have. In fact we were discussing going on a camping trip soon last time he called. We've been together 2y so we've had a lot of experiences traveling together
I do have local friends but they're all much bigger homebodies than my bf and I are so it can be a bit of a process to get together
My best friend, for example, is poly and has a busy job so it can be tough to find time where our schedules line up

>>43099307
Nailed it, anon.

>>43105681
No. But I can get in my own head about things sometimes and hearing someone you trust and love give me some real advice can hit harder for whatever reason

>>43099307
I feel this. I had some time to really think about why a relationship is so important to me last night and I came to the conclusion that I just want to be chosen
I always felt as a kid that (these were the exact words I told my therapist when I was 16) if one of my friends was holding a birthday party and was able to invite 5 people, I would be number 6 on that list
I just want to be someone's number 1

>>43103081
>>43103184
>>43099307
>>43105734
I wouldn't even be able to recognize someone finding me desirable. It's such an alien concept to imagine. If anyone flirted with me is assume they were making fun of me.

>>43105697
Wait do you mean as a woman you don’t feel like you’re getting complimented by people who want to sleep with you often enough? I honestly assumed most women got more of that kind of attention than they wanted, not too little

>>43105796
Your options are to either fix your issues or wallow in self pity forever

>>43100065
Yellow Legacy is on my list to play at some point

>>43105851
Don't know how. Wallowing it is.

>>43105697
If you are not able to get anyone or get attention already then that wouldn't change no matter what sex or gender you are. I'm sorry, that is just how it is.

>>43105804
Yes. I know most men have this idea that women are always beating suitors off with a stick, but it's just not the case. It is if you're hot, but if you're not hot, you're basically invisible. I'm awkward and plain looking. No one has ever asked me out.

>>43106241
I would say least have an app where I could score meaningless sex without worrying about ending up in some guy's basement freezer.

>>43099307
I know this.
> also grew up not-so-high functioning autistic
I was this. Once people have that opinion of you from your autistic acts then you are forever cooked in public school.

>>43106267
But you still do with grindr...

>>43106288
They don't like cis women in grindr

>>43106306
Back when I (bi m) was on grindr, I would've been super into finding an unrepentant fujo cis woman there.
But probably everyone else would hate you lol

>>43106306
No I mean you definitely can be murdered on grindr. There are grinder serial killers

>>43106254
Sorry, I didn’t mean to imply women are fending off suitors left and right, I was honestly thinking more like catcalling and harassment.

>>43106254
>I'm awkward and plain looking. No one has ever asked me out.
Unfortunately for you, I'm am into that.(This usually gets me rejected by women, but successfully flirted with man straight men. But they aren't actually serious, well one might be but there's no way tononow due to distance)

>>43106231
Build a life you're happy with - do hobbies, find clothes that suit you, set goals for yourself in life. Basic shit like that

>>43106772
I guess from an outsiders perspective it just seems like the risk isn't as great. I'm probably wrong.

>>43106941
I have all that! I think I'm pretty fulfilled in life otherwise. I'm not a neet and don't view myself as some unlovable incel. I'm just too stupid to flirt.

>>43107425
>too stupid to flirt.
It's just practice tbhlad

>>43107686
More like winging it and seeing if you can make someone blush for the fun of it.

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My back as hurt for 12 hours guess that means it my turn to go to the dying hole

>>43107825
I would feel like such a troll

>>43107833
Fuck back pain. Never had it chronically, but I’ve had a couple injuries that laid me out for a while. Not fun

anybody have a weekend morning job? i wanna find a second job since if im gonna be a friendless loser i might as well be financially comfortable. looking for recommendations that will teach me something (like cooking maintenance), not direct customer service (back of house is fine) and where companies are looking for someone to take a sarurday and sunday morning shifts.

>>43096687
Idk anon... im trying one last ditch effort of leveraging our bedroom D/s dynamic to improve our vanilla relationship... like i dont mind sacrificing all my free time to cook, clean, serve, etc, but I just need to offload a fraction of the mental load and accountability. All this will take from her is maintaining her Domme persona each night as I do a list of chores.... if it doesn't work idunno... I hate that ive put thought into this but ill probably give her the house and just get a cheap 1 bedroom apartment. I dont care enough to fight for it and I dont need that much space anyway- just enough room to put down a mattress and a squat rack.

Its just hard bc like... if im starting over after this I have no fucking idea how to flirt or approach. All my past relationships have been from people coming to me. I just kinda settle for the first person that shows me a scrap of affection. In this case i got lucky bc shes at least willing to hit me and peg me from time to time. Probably won't be as lucky the next time. Idunno. Im fucking drunk lmao

GN bigen

If you don't feel loved just know I love you

>>43109826
Goodnight, back at you <3

>>43109388
Damn anon… this shit sounds wild. You guys own a house together, or you’re just renting the place? Are you drinking regularly to deal with your stress and feelings? You might want to talk to some friends or family about your situation if you can

>>43109388
>if im starting over after this I have no fucking idea how to flirt or approach

I was in a relationship for 7 years and the last three years were pretty bad. I had some of these same worries about not being able to find someone because I hadn't been dating for a long time.

I can tell you those fears were unfounded, dating really isn't that hard and you'll probably be happier.

The first few months were very hard, but I'm in a lot better place now.

>>43109889
We own a house that we need to finish renovating before we can move in. The mortgage and renovation loan are in my name. We're also renting a place while we reno. She's paying that rent. If i can offload even one of those payments on to her I can afford to live alone but rn she cant afford to pay for both the new place and the current one and I dont wanna fuck her over.

And I dont wanna talk to anyone other than internet strangers bc ill have to confront how fucked it is. I dont want friends and family to worry. Either about her hoarding/clutter or her alcoholism. So id rather drink and bitch and hope that the issue so far was me just not doing enough. And going forward i can hope doing more makes things tolerable... yknow?

Its one of those situations where if I had a crystal ball I wouldnt have entered into in the first place but now that im here I feel obligated to do everything I can to make it work... and like... I dont mind being treated like shit and exploited....ive always been a maso. I just need the person doing the exploiting to appreciate it so I can at least feel like its making someone else happy (and in turn give me an actual sense of purpose). Haven't brought that part up to my therapist bc i dont think she needs to know im a degen lmao. And i don't need things to be good. Just not like... suicidal ideation levels of intolerable.

>are you drinking regularly to deal with your stress and feelings?
Yeah. I wasnt a big drinker before this. Now I try to get a bottle of wine of more in a night to help me sleep.

>>43110198
I’m sorry you’re stuck in the middle of this anon, it sounds worse than what you’d presented so far. I hope you look over your last couple posts when you’re sober and reflect on how unhappy you are. I think the facts that you’re afraid to tell people who know you what’s going on + you’ve gone from not drinking much to a bottle of wine a night really says it all. I really think you should rethink confiding in someone you know. If my friend was in a position like you’re describing I’d want to know about it.

I think it would be worth taking some time and figuring out in greater detail what you’d need to do in order to leave. You’ll feel less trapped with an exit strategy, and you’ll have it in place if you need it.

Take care of yourself anon <3

>>43110316
The issue is that the only people i have to confide in are my direct reports at work or my fucking boss. And while the latter knows some of the details (and can kinda sympathize with a dumpster fire relationship bc she found out her fiancé was sleeping around and moved out in <24hr), i would hate to burden them with how bad shit is + confiding in them would mean id have to come out as either a sub or a fag at work and thatd be weird.

The only other friend ive talked to about this was (funny enough) in my fiances sorority and was like "ye, shes self centered, avoids any and all accountability, and needs to be forced to change... but she cares about you". And like... I respect her POV both bc shes blunt AF and also bc we're both so open around her that ive literally been collared and served her dinner and drinks while she was over so that part of the dynamic wont be weird. But she's also rightly like "I can't tell you what to do you need to make up your own mind" and meanwhile I'm just desperately hoping for some external, objective "you've tried hard enough, you can move on now" permission to try and extricate myself from the situation and until i find it im just hoping (again) that if she can commit to treating me like a 1950s housewife, I can get enough masochistic satisfaction from carrying the logistics and homemaking in the relationship to not have to confront the fact that im miserable

>>43110198
>and i don't need things to be good

You deserve things to be good anon, I got it gets better <3

>>43110198
>Just not like... suicidal ideation levels of intolerable

I've been there, thought about jumping from a tower, stood at the edge.
I've left her and am doing a lot better now.

If you ever seriously consider suicide, please just leave anon

I hope tomorrow is better for everyone. Goodnight /bigen/

>>43108658
It is only trolling if you never even considered a chance with the person. If they don't take it seriously that is on them.

>>43067551
im done trying. just want to invest all my free time in my best friend. shes the only one who gets me

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>>43112009
It won't be. I have work meetings that are pointless.
Have random crossdressing guide since I know half the thread likes skirts.
>>43112855
>im done trying.
Same but I miss drunkinly flirting through discord movie nights. Though it took away from my art goals, pic unrelated.

>>43110656
The friend who went to school with your gf sounds like she’d be a good person to talk to. She’s familiar with your relationship, and also sounds like she has a realistic understanding of some of your gf’s shortcomings. She might also be willing to help your gf cope if you do end up breaking things off.

I hope you re read some of your drunk posts from last night, anon. It seems like you really do understand how unhappy you are, and basically just want permission to throw in the towel. I think you’ll also see how unrealistic your solution of embodying an abused house wife indefinitely is. There might be a way to salvage your relationship, but that’s not it. I think you should be prioritizing your own well being at this point anyway, seeing how unhappy she’s made you.

Please though, get input from people irl too. We don’t know you; we’re just random jerk offs on 4chan.

>I talk with an older woman on hinge
>we share a lot, good vibes
>she talks about how sex and bdsm is important for her, I'm down
>After a week of messaging I ask her out on a date
>She says I'm too short for her and she could "throw me around"
>wtf?
Thats it I am never trying women again, men never do this shit.

>>43114251
Why is this so common? Hell My 5' 7" ass has people erping where they want me to top because I'm shorter but that never happens with women.

What are some of bigen’s favorite YouTube channels?

Pick a few and give a brief description if you wanna weigh in!

Sampson Boat Co- the host Leo is a shipwright and sailor. He bought a derelict old wooden yacht called “Tally Ho” restored it, and is now sailing it around the world. The restoration process took something like 7 years, and is very well documented. Fun people, great craftsmanship, and I think Leo is pretty cute too.

Bill Making Stuff- a crafting channel where Bill makes robots and spaceships and stuff out of trash. The builds are cool, the videos are well edited, and Bill’s got a fun deadpan delivery. Bill is also pretty hot IMO

Anders Erickson- really good craft cocktail channel. Anders is charming and does a good job outlining the history of the cocktails he’s talking about, as well as the theory behind how to modify a recipe or come up with an original. He and his wife Az are both foxes.

Forgotten Weapons- really good firearms history channel. The host Ian is clearly very knowledgeable, and manages to be a gun nut who comes off more like an approachable nerd than a scary creep. Once again I find him likeable and attractive lol

>>43114299
Ian McCollum is a fucked up chud

>>43114312
Is he really? That’s disappointing. Oh well, most gun people are. I’m good on the details, but thanks for letting me know

>>43114323
Ironically that guy he used to hang out with who wears a bunch of SS camo is actually sound, if horribly cringe.

>>43114330
Oh lol yeah the in range guy? I have a hard time watching his videos because he’s so cringey, but yeah he seems like he’s got good politics, and I appreciate that he’s been willing to lose viewers making lefty content. I’m happy he’s out there even if I don’t watch his stuff

>>43114299
Okay maybe skip forgotten weapons lol, but check out the others if the description appeals to you

>>43114312
I just watch videos I don't care about politics much with it. I'll dump some women youtubers I watch.
Michelle McDaniel, siobhan brier Aguilar, petalpalmer
And some random non women
Dankpods/garbagetime, matt orchard, dreading, billiam
These are just stuff I watch.

>>43114158
>It seems like you really do understand how unhappy you are, and basically just want permission to throw in the towel.
Yeah, thats about where I am desu. Im just terrified of giving up too soon and losing something that at times can be great. Like I wouldnt have stayed this long if there weren't pros. She can be incredibly sweet and supportive, and our kinks compliment each other. She's also someone I can just about fully be myself around. And when I was at my recent lowest- hammered, depressed, and realizing I had a pistol in the house, I was able to call her for help and she cut a work trip short, drove in from out of town, and got the gun out of the house bc I didnt trust myself to go near it in my heads pace at the time...

But when I imagine being with her long term and both of us being good examples for kids... I draw a blank or worse, dont like what I see.

>I think you’ll also see how unrealistic your solution of embodying an abused house wife indefinitely is.
Yeah, indefinitely is unrealistic. Im just hoping that if I can do it in the short term I can buy her time to turn things around.

>>43114299
Alex Bromley. Great programming advice and lifting content.

signed up to volunteer for my local pride festival, never been to one before. but honestly most of the events don't really sound up my alley. maybe i'll meet some cool people.

>>43114785
Oh cool, that’s a good idea! I’ll have to look into that myself some time.

>>43114526
Okay that makes a little more sense why you’re conflicted; she does obviously have good qualities and cares about you. That doesn’t necessarily mean you should stick around if the relationship is hell and you can’t imagine a future together. I think you’d be completely within your right to bail out now, and just wish her well on getting her own shit in order.


If you decide you do want to try again though I really think you should talk things out and make it clear what tangible changes you need to see from her, and that you’re prepared to walk if she backslides. Your current plan of just relying on your sub persona to carry things while she spontaneously gets her act together of her own volition is almost guaranteed to fail.

>Alex Bromley
Do they have a decent intro to weight training video? I’ve been meaning to get back into weights, but it’s been so long I’d want a 101 level overview before anything else

>>43114517
Would you recommend any one of these channels in particular? That’s more than I feel like sorting through without descriptions

>>43115232
Michelle McDaniel - sometimes drama youtuber
siobhan brier Aguilar - detailed book and article breakdowns
petalpalmer - medical true crime
matt orchard - true crime
dreading - true crime
billiam - nostalgia for 90s and 00s
Dankpods/garbagetime - Australian with snake who has a lot of junk e waste from the 90s/00s and junker vehicles.

>>43114785
Hope it's a positive experience. I've met some cool people through our pride organizations, but the admin have an insane amount of interpersonal drama

>>43114312
that's too bad, i enjoy those vids. Kentucky ballistics is another solid channel; its fun to watch him shoot watermelons and zombie casts and stuff.

>>43114299
Recently I've been getting into Tor's cabinet of curiosities, which is sort of like a video podcast about weird history and shit, and also started dipping my toes into VODs for the first time in a while with Snapcube.

>>43115640
Thanks the descriptions! Siobhan and Dankpods both sound like stuff I’d be into. I’ll check them out.

>>43116792
Yeah bummed to hear Ian is a chud. I’ve avoided googling him because I like his videos

I’ll check out the cabinet of curiosities channel, sounds like some other series I’ve enjoyed.

>>43114330
>>43114367
>approving of that commie Karl Kasarda
good to know your opinions can be entirely discarded

>>43117104
Dankpods got to collaborate with linus tech tips recently

>>43067551
You know how the term "incel" was coined by a bi cis woman?

Relate.

I wonder what Chan's April first Joke will be Tomorrow

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>>43120784
i really hope they bring the stonk market back, that shit was kino.

Goodnight bigen, be on your toes for April 1st shenanigans

>>43122821
Goodnight anon

>>43122821
We all pretend to be straight for the day?

>>43124584
Kek

You catch the big game last week? How’re the wife and kids? Suck off any hot guys recen- shit, I fucked it up >:(

>>43115232
Yeah... she came home early from a work trip last night and I felt more dread/anxiety than relief at seeing her. If spent the past few hours cleaning and was pretty tired (had been up for ~20hr at that point and did a 12hr workday) but still had a few more things to do. She came in with like 4 bags and just dropped them and I was like "hey, do you wanna put this stuff up and unpack" and she said no, she was tired from driving and curled up on the couch to play on her phone. I finally managed to drag her to unpack but it felt forced and I kinda felt like an ass for pushing... anyway, that took maybe 15m to finish then she had an online game event that ran for an hour and she was super locked in and laughing and joking on discord while I did some more laundry and then went to bed.

She came up a little later while I was still up and I tried to brush off how I was feeling but she insisted so I was like "ye I cant keep doing everything and im exhausted and hitting a breaking point" to which she basically said shes trying as hard as she can and shes making progress, and shes tired, and im too demanding. And I was like all the progress we've made has been me doing 90% of it and you just giving up on fighting me when I want to throw away useless clutter. I confronted her about the game stuff too (bc she legitimately spends more time engaging with game friends and chats than she does w me) and she was like "well thats fun and exciting- I cant get excited for cleaning" and basically put it back on me to lay out what I wanted her to do as far as household stuff and I was kinda like "this is exactly it- you either expect me to do it, or you expect me to micromanage you while you fight me and make excuses at every step for why you cant do something right now, but then if you dont do it immeidately you lose track of it and it doesnt get done and ends up being my job. So that was fun. Almost said fuck it we're done right then and there.

>>43125935
>"well thats fun and exciting- I cant get excited for cleaning"
Bro you need to get the fuck out of there rn I swear to god

>>43126013
>>43125935
I never read any of their posts till now.
Seems normal to me, not to say that is good or acceptable but this is pretty much how it is with my two friends that are in long term relationships. One just married and the other one just lives owns a house with both their names under the title. I mean I get not wanting to do chores after getting home but when you live with other people you should.

>>43126056
Noone wants to do chores, it's the childish attitude that's the problem. Accepting the role of caretaker rather than a reciprocal relationship where both of you are actually mature enough to get shit done, is just retarded

>>43126124
I forgot my trip last post. Yeah, thats what I mean you became their dad, essentially. Though I do see situations where it is okayish, some people(me) cannot get motivated for things unless nagged about it, because I'm a pain in the ass.
Honestly though the description reminds me of a popular video anwhile ago where a woman was complaining about her husband forgetting to get dishes out of the dishwasher and put out the trash in the morning.
Does your partner onow they are being a pain in the ass. Also these things could just be feelings festering over on a lot of smaller things to a festering point. But what do I know, I never really have been in a relationship.

Bump

>>43112809
Yeah but then not taking it seriously would make me want to rope. I just don't have it in me to withstand that much rejection.

>>43125935
>you either expect me to do it, or you expect me to micromanage you while you fight me and make excuses at every step for why you cant do something right now, but then if you dont do it immeidately you lose track of it and it doesnt get done and ends up being my job.

This is called weaponized incompetence and is an intentional strategy to get out of doing things she doesn't want to do

>>43128070
> just don't have it in me to withstand that much rejection
I get burnout but you do have to put yourself out there still. Rejection is just something people have to accept. Also being able to tell when they are rejected.

Anyone else struggle with mental health stuff unrelated to being queer? I've never struggled with being bisexual but I have been severely depressed my whole life. It feels like everyone else has those energy and joy that I completely lack. Things that are easy for everyone else are excruciating or impossible for me. Medication keeps me from killing myself but doesn't make the chore of living any more palatable.

>>43128729
Yeah I've always been ok with my sexuality but not super ok with my ptsd and eating disorder

>>43125935
>she came home early from a work trip last night and I felt more dread/anxiety than relief at seeing her
>Almost said fuck it we're done right then and there.

I've been in this relationship situation more than once. Break up ASAP. You may be looking for a "good reason" but you'll never find one. I know it's easier said than done.

But I now have a fiancee and I'm always happy to see her. I realize how stupid it was to not be more callous towards bad/incompatible partners and break up sooner. Would've been kinder to them and myself.

Stop having fulfilling offscreen lives and bump the thread on 4chan, /bigens/

>>43128756
Yeah, depression and eating disorder feel like more a core component of myself than my sexuality at times

>>43128146
I though weaponized incompetence was purposely doing things asked wrong.

>>43130315
My work is and has been in crunch for months.

>>43130315
Sorry anon! Will try harder to be thread goblin

>>43130801
Any end in sight? I’m in a lull period atm, but should shit’s going to get crazy soon

>>43130315
Sorry I was watching the moon mission

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>>43130860
I think you meant to reply to my other post.
>End in sight
No

Anyone going to pick up tomodachi life living the dream?

I'm loving the demo and love that it as no filter this time