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"Inverted" edition

Previous: >>23913852

/wg/ AUTHORS & FLASH FICTION: https://pastebin.com/ruwQj7xQ
RESOURCES & RECOMMENDATIONS: https://pastebin.com/nFxdiQvC

Please limit excerpts to one post.
Give advice as much as you receive it to the best of your ability.
Follow prompts made below and discuss written works for practice; contribute and you shall receive.
If you have not performed a cursory proofread, do not expect to be treated kindly. Edit your work for spelling and grammar before posting.
Violent shills, relentless shill-spammers, and grounds keeping prose, should be ignored and reported.
(And maybe double-space your WIPs to allow edits if you want 'em.)

Simple guides on writing:
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pHdzv1NfZRM
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=whPnobbck9s
>https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YAKcbvioxFk

Thread theme: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OR12Zp22fnw
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>>23922180
I'm going to write up side up, actually.
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>>23922256
Petition to add
>Attack of the Copula Spiders - Douglas Glover
to the resources pastebin
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>>23922260
Articulate why it should be added in 3000 characters or less.
>>
>>23922287
See: >>23922371 if you're in here.
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>>23922373
>>23922371
Given that the work's original purpose is going to have to be mediated through the setting you can end up with massive mission creep when you're tackling a subject like decolonization which at the British time of it wasn't even universally espoused. The same happens for WW1 if you start tackling the antebellum and the July crisis even if that has more to do with the politics of the last century. A German Catholic school during the interwar period might make more sense in so far as a rebellion goes, given Weimar's general instability, although you don't provide any specifics for the content or causes of the rebellion.
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>>23922406
>you can end up with massive mission creep when you're tackling a subject like decolonization
Oh definitely. I'm not trying to tackle colonization as a whole, but rather certain attitudes associated with it that can carry across to even the present migrant crisis. My intent with the work is


>A German Catholic school during the interwar period might make more sense in so far as a rebellion goes,
That it could. It could even be a 60s American high school, to be honest, but some of the imagery and drama gets lost in doing it. You might see why I chose France shortly.

>although you don't provide any specifics for the content or causes of the rebellion.
Here's the rundown of the rebellion arc:
The cause of the rebellion stems from a single student's existential crisis, which reaches its peak following some counseling sessions with a key staff member, and some malign advice from a groundskeeper. This crisis leads him toward preaching a new gospel that mirrors an amalgamation of rather Dionysian sentiments: anarchism, bolshevism, free love and homosexuality, atheism, moral relativity, absurdism, etc. Very Weimar, very 60s counterculture, very contemporary West.

When this "new gospel" gains traction, the institution is rather weak in its response. It tries to punish the "preacher" early on, but he defies his punishment and gets off scot-free. The school instead focuses on maintaining a veneer of order as it really slips from its grasp. The only force actively countering the rebels, a group of staunchly faithful prefects, are punished for trying to take justice into their own hands. The gospels eventually are published in the student newspaper, and are disseminated.

The often-distant school headmaster's idea of a good response to the rebellion is to hold a debate between himself and the preacher. The debate goes very poorly, as the preacher only uses the event to play to the crowd. The rebellion celebrates their debate "victory" with a days-long party that escalates as time goes on. The "key staff member" from earlier, while this is going on, suggests calling in the local army garrison which the headmaster immediately shuts down for fear of scandal. He thinks that the staff can manage it and departs from the school, heading for the countryside.

The party descends into bacchanal, and cracks between the preacher's followers begin to form. Resentment begins to bubble. Our preacher, after conferring with this groundskeeper, decides to rally his followers by calling them to physically take control of the school with him. This culminates in a ferocious clash with prefects and mass vandalism. The preacher seeks out the key staff member, who counseled him, amidst all of this and converses with him - coming to a revelation that breaks him. His death shortly follows, after he falls onto the school's wrought iron fence from the balcony of the staff member's office. The local garrison arrives, having been called for when the violence began.
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>>23922406
>>23922461
>My intent with the work is
Oops.

My main intent with the work is to write about the trends that we see present today without being too on-the-nose about it. It just feels a bit bleh and rather aesthetically displeasing to write about trannies. I think several of these arguably detrimental movements throughout history bear many similarities, and I hope to relate them and highlight common points of failure.

Still got a lot of honing to do, though. You can see that the nature of the European Catholic student rebellion would be drastically different to the potential nature of the "decolonial" African one. I may as well stick with this setting, and leave my Africa/migrant/colonialism commentary for something else.
>>
I re-read the "novel" I started on back in May, and it fucking sucks. My short stories are miles ahead of this pathetic attempt, which transitions from a young-adult book to an adult drama, and then to a sci-fi story which devolves into a philosophical tragedy.

I guess punching my writing into ChatGPT and getting critiques has really beat the "show, don't tell" into me, as my writing now is incredibly more vivid.

I think this book has serious potential, but the longest story I've ever written is only 10k words, or 19 pages, single spaced. I truly cannot imaging writing something that's over 50k words long, especially when my vocabulary sucks dick and I reuse the same 25 words over and over.

End blog.
>>
Is it wrong, I talk to chatgpt, not to get ideas but to share my own...its my only friend
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>>23922688
The thing with chatbots is they're always over-enthusiastic about your ideas and writing. They'll tell you that you're working on a literary masterpiece, and then tell you to "show, not tell" about three times.
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>>23922692
Oh I know. I tell it to act with a range from healthy disagreement to skeptic whenever I just share stuff
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>>23922692
Just ask it to critique you without telling you any "show don't tell"-related advices
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I just want to write better, so I can express my opinions on Goodreads book reviews without sounding dim.
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>>23922716
You read books? Lol
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>>23922180
I’m published. AMA
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>>23922749
Self-published? Distributed to bookstores? Advertised? Or are you just Woolston?
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>>23922763
Distributed to bookstores, yes. Advertised? I guess so. Publishers pay for my promo but I have to do my own through networking. I’ve met Woolston and he’s got less publications than me.
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>>23922772
Nice. Are you highly intersectional? I'm wondering how you got the attention of a publisher/agent in the first place.
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>>23922780
No. Just find a market and research it. The main thing is reading a lot. And finding calls for submissions if you’re going to do short stories or poetry like me.
Novels also have calls for submissions, mainly in literary prizes or in independent presses.
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>>23922180
Stop wasting your SFF stories by posting them on 4chan. Write a short story once a week or once a month and try your hand at making it as a writer. The chances are slim, but you will get paid if you send to these places. Don't look back once you make your first sale.

>Clarkesworld
https://clarkesworldmagazine.com/submissions/
1000-22000 words, no exceptions
12c (USD) per word. No horror but dark SF/F permitted.
No use of Chat GPT nor AI allowed
No simultaneous submissions (do not send the story somewhere else).
Stories must be well-written, suitable for audio (since there are narrated audiobooks), and convenient for screen reading (so no weird formatting).
Rigor in science fiction is appreciated, but it does not need to be "hard."
There can't be any of the tropes listed on the site.

>Asimov's
https://www.asimovs.com/contact-us/writers-guidelines
up to 7500 words, at 10c per word (USD)
Character oriented stories, but there is also some poetry $1 per line
Absolutely no use of Chat GPT nor AI allowed
No simultaneous submissions (do not send the story somewhere else).

>Fantasy & Science Fiction
https://www.sfsite.com/fsf/glines.htm
No simultaneous submissions (do not send somewhere else).
Up to 25,000 words in length. 8-12 c (USD) per word. You must read a sample of the magazine before sending.

>Interzone Digital
https://interzone.digital/submissions/
Simultaneous submissions accepted (you can send somewhere else).
Maximum of 5000 words. 1.5c (EURO) per word. Double-spaced and emailed.

>Amazing Stories
https://submission.amazingstoriesmag.com/guidelines/
$20 per story, $10 per flash (USD), and poetry also
No simultaneous submissions, no multiple submissions
1000 to 24,000 words

>Apex Magazine
https://apex-magazine.com/submissions/
8c per word (USD), up to 7500 words
Usually dark sci fi or horror is accepted.

>Beneath Ceaseless Skies
https://www.beneath-ceaseless-skies.com/submissions/
Up to 15,000 words, 8c per word (USD)
Provides feedback on rejections
No use of Chat GPT nor AI allowed
Character-focused, adventure fantasy (no sci fi nor horror) that has a deep sense of world.
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>>23922797
This is a good resource, thanks.
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>>23922797
This should be in the OP
>>
Started writing the manuscript again and holy shit it's not a huge pile of dogshit like the previous version, it might not be good either but it's progress.
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>>23922968
It shouldn’t. You should run away from 4chan and never come back.
>>
For writing genre books (not web serials, as I think those have different standards) is there an upper limit on how long a chapter should be? If so, what is it?
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>>23923029
No. But generally just look at what’s printed right now and copy the length.
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>>23923029
Depends on how you connect between chapters with conclusions or cliffhangers, but generally keep it under 5k words. Think of it in terms of reading time as well. Average reading speed is about 230 WPM, so you can use that as a reference; 5k words would be over 20minutes.
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>>23923000
How about you come into my rape hole and I'll show you where I come from you foul little cocksucker.
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>>23923043
You’re sad
Either unemployed or friendless if you post here
>>
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>>23922180
I know how to ask this anywhere else.
How do I know when I should be doing a new paragraph? Is it every time the focus changes? And what about when someone talks, does an action, and keeps talking? Does that all go in the same line? I keep trying to write without thinking but not having a feel for how I'm supposed to arrange paragraphs is fucking up my flow. Yes I read books and pay attention to what they do but I still don't get it
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>>23922797
Wait these still exist? /lit/ told me the magazine scene was dead.
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>>23923046
One more reply from you and I'll use your ass as a turnstyle. I'll be using you as a goon stuck for a week for your misconduct. Now behave yourself you silly faggot.
>>
Didn’t realize there was a new thread.

>>23923114
Someone asked me if I had a question about this premise I put forward about a story involving a meteor impact which may or may not have been a natural disaster. I’m currently struggling to figure out what kicks off the investigation.
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>>23922797
>No use of Chat GPT nor AI allowed
They'll never catch me
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>you have actually really good structure and flow that just needs a little more oomph to sell the tone and set the mood.

I just want to say thanks to the anon who critiqued my piece at the end of the last thread. It made me a lot more confident in my writing, but I also want to point out my MC isn't a writer but actually an painter, he's having one of those weird morning audio hallucinatory experiences where it sounds like you hear someone calling your name. I've had both many times the falling sensation and the one I wrote about and they are both incredibly creepy.
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>>23923202
>I just want to say thanks to the anon who critiqued my piece at the end of the last thread. It made me a lot more confident in my writing,
Yaay! You're welcome!
>but I also want to point out my MC isn't a writer but actually an painter,
I just had a gut feeling your MC was a creative-type, they way he talks to himself. His being an artist, you should maybe really try to incorporate more painterly terms into his internal monologue (foreshortened; chiaroscuro; scumble etc.) because all the artists I knew processed the world visually that way--kinda fascinating.
>he's having one of those weird morning audio hallucinatory experiences where it sounds like you hear someone calling your name. I've had both many times the falling sensation and the one I wrote about and they are both incredibly creepy.
Don't jinx me.

Have a good day, anon :)
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>>23922797
Wait if I post my work here (say via pastebin) does that mean I can't send that to these magazines?
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>>23923272
Yes. They reverse search the text and when they find you’ve engaged with that racist part of the dark web known as 4chan you’ll be list of colored from the publishing world.
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>>23923315
Nooo not the anonymous hacker known as 4chan!
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i have a general question that im sure has been asked/answered many times before but i don't come her often so apologies in advance

how does one deal with the fact you have an idea for a story but know you're lacking the skills to properly put it down on paper and create something of decent quality?
i have an idea for a story, but i know i lack the skills to produce something of quality. how should i go about it? should i just go and accept that it'll be shit, or practice and write it later or just write it and edit it over time as i become better?
i feel that if my story isn't well written, then i might as well not write it at all as to not "tarnish" the idea, but i fear that i'll never feel ready or capable enough and will never actually write it. but in the same vein, if the outcome is shit because of my lack of skills and practice, i wasted the idea
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>>23923081
There's no rule for it. It's like asking how long a sentence should be. Try putting the breaks in different places and see how they change the reading experience.

Because I write for internet attention spans I've lately been trying to make paragraphs as short as possible. 'Is another paragraph break possible here?' is an easier question to answer than 'Would another paragraph break here be aesthetically optimal?' So maybe give that a go, as a start.
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It's bedtime. I'm trying to find a title because it's one way to pass the time until I fall asleep. All my ideas suck, for a few different reasons that vary between tries
>They are painfully generic and wouldn't grab my interest if I saw them in a bookstore (granted, I mostly browse with covers first, but titles play a part)
It's the kind of title you roll your eyes at when you see them in AA game, like "Winds of Fate: Awakening" or "Plains of Kilyotos: Awakening", or "Master of Warriors: Awakening", you know the kind
>They are based on obscure words, generally from antique languages, and the effect falls flat because most won't understand
For example "Katabasis" or "Apokatastasis". I like the musicality of it, one long word, but it's very likely no one would get it (and the few who would will go on to the third point)
>They spoil major development of the plot, at least enough to see part of the ending coming

I've snooped around in my memories for a title that stood out to me, what came on my mind was the psychological horror TF2 fan film, Emesis Blue. The title perfectly convey, in 4 syllables, the depth of the work
>Emesis is a pretty unknown term (at least ESL non-health professionnal me think so), which means "to vomit". If you know the word, you may already be expecting that this isn't going to be as fun a ride that you could expect from TF2
>If you don't know what Emesis means (like me), you might latch on to the similar-souding Nemesis, also a source of worry
>If you don't know any of that, you just take it as a word you don't know, vaguely scientific-sounding and maybe made up, which ties into the science theme that's a core part of the movie
>"Blue" can refers both to the BLU team (also significant because BLU in TF2 official content is typically the "lesser" team), or the look of old corpses, again, efficient in sharing a mood.
Emesis Blue is a great title, each word has multiple meanings, none of which contradict itself. Of course given the quality and positive word-of-mouth of the actual movie it probably ended up not mattering that much but I like to find the viewers who got this ball started were in part lured there by the title (and miniature)

Any good titles you managed to find for your stuff, anons? Or a title that impressed you.
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>>23923525
In my experience, here's how it works
>be obsessed with an idea
>'give it a go', despite feeling unqualified
>reread it, feel disgusted, delete
>a year or two later, return to the same idea
>try it again, and miraculously, it 'works'
I don't know why the aborted first attempt seems necessary for the eventual success, but for some reason it does.
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>>23922461
>>23922480
Critique requires a fundamental understanding of what you're trying to criticize in order for it to have any actual effect, and by that I don't mean fellow ideologues patting you on the back for repeating what the latest paid thinker is spurting out of his rectum. Most people do not share your worldview so they would not see any parallels being drawn between your "Dionysian" amalgamation of choice and the «nothing ever happens» zeitgeist, nor would anyone with any ounce of common sense agree with the solutions in your novel whether that's what you actually believe should be put into praxis or whether it's what would have reasonably have happened at the time. Either way it just comes off as foreplay for Russo-Hungarian cleptocracy and while I'm an enjoyer of weird extremist ideologies even I can't reconcile a republic idolizing Austro-Hungarian regalia or the daughter of an MP of the communist party owning 6 luxury apartments in Dubai. What I'm fundamentally getting at, even if all of these references went over your head, is that in order for you to have anything interesting to say, even if it's from an illiberal perspective, your work would actually need to address key tenants of the ideologies that you disagree with as opposed to the ideological party line that you're most comfortable with. If you don't exercise critical thinking you won't be able to write a good work on the subject, you'll merely capture whatever slice of it is easiest for you (and your readership follows conversely). This is diametrically opposed to good critique, satire or not.
Besides that the headmaster's attitude towards all of this requires some serious suspension of disbelief to the point where it undermines the fact that corporal punishment was accepted back then and would have been relentlessly administered before a swift expulsion.
And like I've very briefly touched upon, this "Dionysian" amalgamation has no unifying thread other than opposition to Catholic orthodoxy; some are ideological opposites and most weren't present at the time. This isn't to say that none of this could have happened in some form of loosely defined prototypical ideology, but that would require a careful construction of such an ideology as well as different thought currents within it.
An individual's crisis also undermines legitimate reasons for the entire student body to revolt and would become a plothole later even if it's convenient to what you wanted to write about. Why would they revolt if everything is fine and good? Why would anyone not become a trad cath if being a tranny migrant is fine and good? Now that's the real food for thought right there.
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>>23922180
i thought writing upsite down
is left to right
meaning what has been left out putting it in and thus make it right
in different words: what was lacking in action
i made up with traction: the left hand smears the ink all over the paper
thats the excercise of elevating the wrist gently like a bridge over the hardened word
the tipping crawls of a bird that walks on the water suspension
is balance of poise and rythm with attention
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>>23923525
Facing a similar issue where I'm self aware of my own failing.
I just start by laying out the outline of my story. Then I break it down into sequences. Then characters. I keep going further down into details until I cover all the chapters as simple outlines. From there I just write what I can. I'm sure you know enough to tell when writing is shit. Just break down all you can
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>>23923081
>what about when someone talks, does an action, and keeps talking?
Yes, generally ehta'ts the same paragraph.
>>
>Would you keep reading?

I've been burning my father's playing cards in the backyard. There's a spot behind the tree with the tire swing, between the valley of two ancient roots, where I hold the playing cards over the flame of a cigarette lighter. They have naked ladies on them, the cards, and they are brown and musty and enormous, like the old books my father keeps in his basement, and does not allow anyone to read.

My father is a magician. He can do card tricks, coin vanishes, some remarkable things with balls in cups (which he claims are illusions as old as Babylon), and this one trick where he catches a musket ball in his teeth fired from an old pistol. He bought the pistol from a fat german man with a hard to pronounce name. It's supposedly the pistol Lt. Robert Maynard fired into the heart of the pirate Blackbeard in 1718. I feel I am too old now to fall for such tales, but I humor my father when he calls it "Blackbeard's pistol". As in, "don't make me hide you with Blackbeard's pistol, boy, don't give me no sass". Of course, my father would never actually hit me. He is not a violent man despite what all the newspapers say. Yes, he has too much love of theatrics to completely remove the threat of violence from his art, but he is all bark.

The ladies take a long time burn, and their faces are always the last to go. If Mrs. Esperenza, our neighbor, ever found me with them I'm certain she'd be embarrassed. She is a very religious woman. Every night before she goes to sleep, she lights a votive on her bedroom window shaped like the head of Jesus. I asked her about this once, and she said it was for her son, who is fighting the terrorists in Afghanistan. My father says religion is the greatest trick ever pulled. Eighty generations believing in the same tired miracles. At least, that's what he told my mother when she showed up last month in a nice white dress, her hair all straight, without bags under her eyes, or chapped lips, or dark bruises on her ankles. My father wouldn't let her touch me.

"Assurances? What assurances?" he asked. He was already shouting, but my mother was calm, she spoke soothingly, the same way she did in the audiobooks my father still sometimes listened to, alone in his car.

"You can meet with my sponsor, and you can come to the meetings--I want you to come--"

My father shook his head. "Don't. Don't tell me it's different now. Don't show me no chips. And don't bullshit a bullshitter."

"Norm, he's my son too."

"No he ain't. He's no more your son than that potted plant on the porch."

"I have a right--I'm his mother--"

"You waived all rights to motherhood when you put that needle in your arm. That's your God, darling. You can't cheat on him for long with Jesus Christ."

My mother was silent a moment. She touched her arm as if to scratch, then stopped herself. "The judge'll feel differently," she said.

"I'll kill you. As sure as grass is green, I'll choke you till you're white and blue, you come near my son."
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>>23923525
Why not just... improve your skills first?
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>>23923569
I am not criticising the ideology. If I wanted to do that, I'd write an essay.

>Besides that the headmaster's attitude towards all of this requires some serious suspension of disbelief to the point where it undermines the fact that corporal punishment was accepted back then and would have been relentlessly administered before a swift expulsion.
This is addressed.
>Why would they revolt if everything is fine and good?
Because they're dissatisfied, angsty, children. Have you not met children?
>Why would anyone not become a trad cath if being a tranny migrant is fine and good?
Easier for weak and undisciplined people. This is addressed.
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>>23923538
The first drafts of your favourite writing from you favourite authors/poets are always shitty
>>
>Only have 156 followers
>Co-Pilot AI has a comprehensive summary of my webnovel
That's fucking weird
>>
There isn't nearly enough resources on how to market your book. From what I can tell, paid ads are only worth it if you have 3 books out, but I'm not entirely sure what I should do for the first 2.
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My comedic detective puts on a VR headset is doing bretty well with beta readers, are comedic stories viable or is the market too post ironic to enjoy them?
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>>23923899
It's been a feature for LLMs to web search for responses for months now. It probably just looked it up.
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>>23923899
It means your work is so predictable a computer can recreate it based on the tiniest context clues like the title and the way you phrased your question.
>>
Anyone do any script writing?
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>>23923127
>turnstyle
illiterate
opinion discarded (as if the seething wasn't enough of a clue)
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>>23923669
back to r/wowthanksimcured with you, plebbitor
>>
I have a character from a not!Scottish clan called Armstrong

He was born with a deformed left hand like the dude from Scary Movie 2. What compounds things even worse is his older and younger brother are both able-bodied and fit, while his younger sister is considered beautiful.

Is it reasonable he'd have been picked on relentlessly for that deformity throughout much of his life? I intended him to be the second son of a powerful aristocrat, so while lower class folks wouldn't dare cross him, those of equal or higher standing were more than happy to point out the irony of being part of a family named Armstrong with that deformity and give him a hard time for it.
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>>23924148
It would be bizarre if he DIDN'T get bullied for having a fucked up weird alien hand. People get teased into suicide for far less.
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>>23924159
What are some good nicknames?

Since his surname is Armstrong, I was thinking they'd call him by his surname to be subtle ("I was just calling him by his family name, teacher!") but I can't think of a good short and snappy nickname for when they wanted to be more insulting.
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>>23924167
Handy Andy
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>>23923659
No, I would not keep reading. No offense, not my cup of tea and the dialog is annoying.
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>>23923669
it's the idea that i'll never feel ready for it. like someone doesn't feel like he's ready to be a dad until his wife becomes pregnant. i feel like i can spend my life spinning my wheels and never taking a leap
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>>23923857
They can’t be THAT shitty. Good writers don’t need to revise.
>>
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>Tālia vōce refert cūrīsque ingentibus aeger spem vultū simulat, premit altum corde dolōrem.
Mouth-wise (Aennie) summons-to-mind such(-spokened-meanings) and the (Ilian-)ill with incredible Aenxieties feigns faith face-wise, presses depression deep heart-wise.*
>Illī sē praedae accingunt dapibusque futūrīs:
The [table-carded] Teucri pre-game themselves 4 the prey-game and 4 the about-to-exist eats:
>tergora dīripiunt costīs et vīscera nūdant;
they strip-seize the skins off the [cervidaes'] costal-xylophone-mallets and strip-tease-'spose the [stags'] malleable-Xenomorphilic-comestibles;†
>pars in frusta secant veribusque trementia fīgunt, lītore aēna locant aliī flammāsque ministrant.
(Some) slice a share into finger-foods and joust-drive the [still-]juddering(-drive-thru-meals) with javelins, others are a'locatin' CuSn(-containers) on the shore and are governing the [garden-of-]flames.
>Tum vīctū revocant vīrīs, fūsīque per herbam implentur veteris Bacchī pinguisque ferīnae.
Then from food refuel (they their) forces, and, picnic-blanketed [all] over the pasture, they are-a'plumping-up-full'a [--BELCH!!--] Bacchus <far-in-years††> and the fatty feral(-feast). [Est comedendum dēsertum! Hanc īnsulam, nōn dulcīs :P].

* <"My doki-doki is NOT okey-dokey...">

† Ferēbar procul; verbum-per-verbum sānum sit:
(They) tear-apart hides from-ribs and (they) expose entrails.

†† What they went through probably aged that wine a century.
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>>23922692
What's "show don't tell"? In a book you "show" by telling
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>>23924243
Tell, don't show. Anime and manga have proven that telling readers is highly necessary since there is no ambiguity or guess work. It provides a clear message and authors intent. Most writing here has readers complain about about clarity, telling is the most clear form of writing. Anime enjoyers prove that telling is far superior to showing
>>
>>23923531
Oh. I thought there was an official formatting structure you were supposed to follow. If it's all arbitrary then yeah I can do it where it feels good.
I just get really tripped up on mixing action and dialogue in the sentence. I want to have a character say something, do something in the scene, and then continue talking. Or talk at the same time as doing something. Then I get worked up about where to indent for paragraphs between those transitions.
>>
>>23923659
>Mrs. Esperenza
sounds fake (even if it was spelled Esperanza)

>some remarkable things with balls in cups (which he claims are illusions as old as Babylon),
meh

>who is fighting the terrorists in Afghanistan.
what year is this?

>As sure as grass is green,
cliche

apart from that, it's okay. i guess i would keep reading
>>
Would a teenage girl date an orbiter she would normally hate just to make an ex jealous?

What would be some good signs that they're just using him for jealousy purposes?

>Only affectionate with orbiter when others are around
>Makes orbiter do tasks for them (carry books, etc)
>Really public with affections so that ex will hear about it
>Never gets too physical with orbiter (i.e. no rumours of sex between them)

I wonder if there's any more ways.
>>
>>23924243
It's a meme. 95% of people don't understand it and say to do it, not knowing what they even mean. Read any book and you'll see the majority of text is telling. Reserve showing for important actions. If some random guy in a restaurant sips his coffee, just tell me his sips his coffee. I don't need a paragraph description of the boldness of the roast caressing his taste buds, or the sting he feels as he burns his tongue.
>>
I think if I were to write a romance novel, it would be about a guy trying to date his older sister. I would take it seriously too. If people will praise and read Lolita then surely this isn't too far.
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>>23924382
go full GRRM and include a scene of a girl shitting on the grass
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>>23924405
I said the other day that I would never read a GRRM book, but now I might have to reconsider.
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>>23924351
You don't know what it means either
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>>23922749
Show off hardcover binding. I want to ogle.
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>>23924344
She would but not for long. Eventually, the ex would stop caring and she would leave the orbiter.
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>>23924418
It's the only shitting scene, but there are other sex scenes

>“Sunset found her squatting in the grass, groaning. Every stool was looser than the one before, and smelled fouler. By the time the moon came up, she was shitting brown water. The more she drank the more she shat, but the more she shat, the thirstier she grew.”
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>>23924429
Many such cases. Women are cruel like that.
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>>23923569
This is the most long-winded pseud thing I have ever fucking read.
>>
https://www.reddit.com/r/aiwars/

These people are literally unhinged. They don't give a fuck about us. They WANT us to suffer because they don't have the talent to pick up a damn pen themselves.
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>>23924429
Yeah I didn't think it would last very long.

What would be some clear signs that she's just using him for jealousy?
>>
>>23924502
The fact that she's with him in the first place is an obvious sign. The ex would know about him, she would've talked about him while they were together and told him how much she isn't interested in him and stuff like that.
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>>23923525
Many of the greatest writers spend over 4000 hours revising a single book. It will never be perfect on first draft.

I think, If you have the words in your head as a beginner, that's a blessing, and you write them down. Worry about perfecting it later.
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>>23924506
Also, she could do things like flaunting him, bringing him around the ex when she has no reason to be in the same place as him, posting him A BUNCH to her social media, shit like that.
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>>23924509
NTA but how do I stop worrying about not having enough words? I have a small idea, I just don't know how to turn it into a full length novel.
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>>23924236
lol
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>>23924506
I mean signs for the orbiter to notice but ignore (because he's living his dream atm)

>>23924510
>social media
that's a good idea, although this is more a Harry Potter setting (magic instead of tech) so I guess it'll be more like telling all their mutual friends about the relationship
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>>23924555
>I mean signs for the orbiter to notice but ignore
He wouldn't notice them, they could be the most glaring signs and he'd still think that she's with him for him.
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>>23924179
I did have in mind the name Randolph.

I intended his father to be an old crippled war veteran missing a leg, and who is a cunning and shrewd social climber (akin to Montrose from Rob Roy).

I wanted the deformed hand son to be a skilled mage. I wonder what's a good way for the father to obviously only start caring about his son once he shows signs of being "useful", since before he was just a deformed kid who would be useless in battle and a poor marriage prospect due to his deformity.
>>
>>23924382
Now look. Would I have a boner the entire time I was writing this? Yeah, I would. Is this fetish content? I don't know, I don't have an older sister nor am I attracted to my younger sister, but I think incest is morally OK. Am I saying that they'd fuck in this book? No, they probably wouldn't, but still.
>>
Do you think it's wrong to bounce ideas and shit off an AI? I'm not using it to come up with the plot for my entire story, just using it the same way you would if you were to bounce ideas off a friend.
>>
Been told I use too many animal-based similes
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>>23924687
How many? A beastly amount?
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>>23924687
Example time.
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>>23924344
>she is a dancer!
>belle would have versailles buffet every evening!
>she has an interesting asortment taste in movies!
>she is soooo clever!
WHEREISBAAHBONNUS??
>>
Let me get a bacon, egg, and cheese with a side of HOW YA DOIN?
>>
How do I know if I'm overusing metaphors and smilies and being too poetic?
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>>23924750
Give us an example of your writing
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>>23924243
"Show don't tell" is how you keep the reader engaged.
>>
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been having a bitch and a half of a time trying to get writing done lately
but at least my artist is getting work done
picrel
it's an early color wip, not finished
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>>23924512
The "snowflake" method tries to address that very problem. https://www.advancedfictionwriting.com/articles/snowflake-method/
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>>23924512
NTA but the way i'd see it, maybe just write exerpts or passages and see how it flows. maybe start with a short story?
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>>23924772
It's not in English, but here's Google translation of a passage:

..
The smell of the drug raced with the smell of the perfume with every other smell that inhabited the hospital corridors to his nose while white rays of neon lights fell on his face as he headed to Mia's room, he felt relief creeping into him. The muscles of his face relaxed little by little until they had completely withered before he reached the room, but the spirit emerged from nothingness in them when he saw Mia from behind the glass door of her room. He contemplated her for a moment before he entered, and he had every right to do so. Mia, in his eyes at least, was a thread that had seeped out of a dream. The eyes were blue and the cheeks were pink, just like her mother had been before. And like her mother, her dark brown hair contrasted with her whiteness, making it clear. All that remained of his late wife was her. However, he did not stop to contemplate this painting hanging behind the glass only because it resembled the memory of a woman he loved 22 years ago, but also because it resembled the memory of what had happened a few hours ago. Despite the similarity of Mia to Layla, his wife, in appearance, her personality matched his. And now she was before his eyes, leaning her elbow on a pillow, her forehead resting on her left palm, and her hand turning something in the shape of a pen. He smiled at her cold calm, knowing that the best time to meet her was when she was bored, when he would see his presence reflected in a smile. And so it was. As soon as the creaking of the door reached her ears, her eyes glowed and she smiled.
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>>23924512
Stop caring about word count. The only reason to care about word count is if you're trying to get traditionally published, because the modern publishing industry is fucked up in regards to necessary standards. If your story ends up being 10k words, great it's a short story. If it's 30k words, great it's a novella. If it's 60k words, great it's the beginnings of a novel.
Don't bloat your story to reach a word count or it will suffer. Only expand it if you feel like it is necessary to get across what you want. If you feel you can adequately get the idea across in 10k words then do it.
On the other side of the coin, critically read some of your favorite books and count the pages in chapters, try to see how they flip between action chapters and stationary chapters, see how quickly they progress things. If you are writing for yourself, word count actually doesn't matter. If you want to be self-published, it doesn't (I have seen plenty of 15k word novels on amazon's top lists, readers don't give a shit) but it would be good to study and make sure your stories are short because your idea is succinct and not because you're leaving out things which the reader wants to know which you don't actively realize because you already them in your head.
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>>23924872
I'm writing for myself cause I know I'm not good enough to get published. My problem is that I don't know how to write enough even for myself. I write a few pages based on what I've already thought of and then I can't come up with anything else, my imagination is very limited.
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>>23924884
Well keep trying. Plenty of stories are dropped in the first few pages, so maybe you just need to try until you find one you're passionate about. Or maybe you need to try loosely planning things (ie. separating the story into three parts and deciding what generally happens in each part.) It could help you keep a broader view and keep you writing towards something.
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>>23923735
So basically the Catholic school couldn't possibly be at fault for the mass social upheaval within its student body so the reason for the core conflict of the book is that they're children... I do recall being a child at some point, but the part where me and my fellow children started an avant-garde cultural revolution eludes my memory.
You also reveal that the book is meant to allude to the weak and undisciplined people that plague modernity yet, if on were to look at the previous paragraph, your entire point is that they're essentially just children. Calling someone a child really wins hearts and minds, but then again that's not really the goal of this work.
>I am not criticising the ideology.
Obviously the main point isn't to oppose ideas from 100 years ago but it is nonetheless criticizing them even if it's just as bails of hay that are meant to be stand ins for tranny migration. Commentary is still criticism, it doesn't have to be a formal essay.
I don't think that you're going to write anything compelling nor do I believe that the final result will have any literary value as you've presented it to me. Sure, there's some thought into the structure of such a novel but it's not meant to portray historical injustice, it's not meant to be nuanced, it's not meant to make you think, it's a tool to forward the idea that your political rivals are infantile (and that they should be violently suppressed). You might as well write about a fascist revolution and how everyone's lives at the Catholic school improved on a personal level from it, just replace the existential crisis with a young man trying to overcome his weakness and lack of discipline spurred on by a strong father figure and suddenly you have a compelling novel! Just ignore that part where there's parallels to fascist Italy and the Roman Curia that ultimately would make it into an unintentional parody. Do you seriously not see how self-serving the entire thing is and how it's no different from a propaganda piece? Who would actually want to read this? You're not even making a positive case for what you believe in, it's purely a negative case for what you disagree with; this probably reflects your societal outlook but I can't say that I have an interest in psychoanalysis.
You said that you chose France but you're not even following the structure of the French Revolution or even really alluding to other points in history that would support your claim of the existence of cyclical detrimental movements. If you're going to write something bad at least do it well since you're really not going to get your parallels across to anyone like this.
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>>23924897
I'll try but I'm painfully boring and unimaginative, thanks for your advice, big tuna.
>>
Any good free online guides for getting started with writing fiction? Step by step stuff with exercises preferably? Story structure, world building, character building. I'm thinking of publishing on ao3 and/or royalroad, starting with shorter stories and working my way up to novel-length stuff.
>>
After years, I was finally able to reclaim that mindset of writing fully and only for myself, without giving a shit about the thoughts and feelings of any asshole who might read the work in the future. The result becomes 900% more fun and enjoyable this way. I was an idiot to ever try anything else.
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>>23924965
Nah
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>>23925066
If you're interested in fantasy/sci-fi, Brandon Sanderson's lectures are a good resource; they are free on YouTube
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>>23924586
No it's not wrong. It can help keep your internal monologue going, but you need a critical eye towards the conversation.
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>>23925143
>Brandon Sanderson
>>
First, I would procure at least one box of co-codamol from a pharmacy.
This could be a bit tricky, as after a while the staff at one particular pharmacy would recognise me if I went there too frequently - or at least that's what I was thinking.
In all the years I've done that, it happened only once, from what I can remember - I made sure to never go back to that particular pharmacy again.

I would walk around town, sometimes take a bus, to go to a pharmacy that I haven't been to yet. When I started to run out of pharmacies, I would then start to rotate - the biggest chains, like Boots for example, made me feel more easy - the staff changed frequently and thus I would be served by a different person very often in these. If the same person that served me the last time was at the counter, I would simply leave the pharmacy and go to another one.

Travelling to another city gave me the occasion to shop in brand new pharmacies - but even then, in cities I would travel to frequently for work for example, I would start to have to rotate as well.

This resulted in a lot of walking, which in a way kept me fit - I was quite thin at that time, I think mostly because of that and because I was only eating once a day.

At the beginning I would use the whole box - each tablet had 8mg of codeine, 8 tablets per box. I would crush the tablet in a plate with a glass, mix the powder with water, put that in the fridge for a while.

Then I would take a coffee filter, make it wet, tie a rubber band at the bottom - fix it on a tall glass with another rubber band, then pour the mixture in this makeshift decanter.

After a while, I would end up with a clear solution full of codeine, and would discard the white powder left over in the filter.

Drinking the solution gave me quite a kick, especially on an empty stomach - the first time I used this method, I had a bit of a reaction and became all red in the face - my tolerance climbed up quickly however, and after a while I just felt the high.
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>>23925143
Thanks! A lot of what I like is sci-fi and fantasy, yeah, and nearly all of it has at least some elements of it.
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>>23924965
>>23924965
>So basically the Catholic school couldn't possibly be at fault
Where do I suggest this? Presented them as pretty incompetent throughout.
>so the reason for the core conflict of the book is that they're children
Very reductive.

>but the part where me and my fellow children started an avant-garde cultural revolution eludes my memory.
Welcome to fiction. This is not real life. That said, there are a litany of examples of young people engaging in forms of rebellion.

>it's a tool to forward the idea that your political rivals are infantile (and that they should be violently suppressed)
Not really. I align, personally, with the prefects, who are children too. They also fail. Regardless, any time you write something you are asserting a position.

>You might as well write about a fascist revolution and how everyone's lives at the Catholic school improved on a personal level from it, just replace the existential crisis with a young man trying to overcome his weakness and lack of discipline spurred on by a strong father figure and suddenly you have a compelling novel! Just ignore that part where there's parallels to fascist Italy and the Roman Curia that ultimately would make it into an unintentional parody
Why would I write a pro-fascist work?

>Do you seriously not see how self-serving the entire thing is and how it's no different from a propaganda piece?
A propaganda piece would probably have a clear winner. Nobody wins in this story.
The school are impotent and fighting the reputation battle, the rebels self-destructs under its own contradictions, and the prefects fail to garner support. Each group, regardless of intent, is flawed. The garrison is not party to any of the moral or ideological questions raised, they are just there to restore order. A deus ex machina.

>You're not even making a positive case for what you believe in, it's purely a negative case for what you disagree with; this probably reflects your societal outlook but I can't say that I have an interest in psychoanalysis.
The book does critique revolutionary ideologies I disagree with, but it also makes a positive case for practicing and defending Catholic values, which are embodied by the prefects.

>You said that you chose France but you're not even following the structure of the French Revolution or even really alluding to other points in history that would support your claim of the existence of cyclical detrimental movements.
I chose France because it's a predominantly Catholic country with a history of revolution and leftism, not because I wanted to write about "The Revolution". Do you or do you not recall when I said this was an "amalgam"? I'm not trying to provide a model. Read Spengler for that.


Frankly it just seems that you are upset that my work has a stance at all, and isn't some meandering "exploration".
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>>23925328
>the rebels self-destructs under its own contradictions
the rebellion*
>>
I'm writing a book where the main character is essentially the textbook definition of a passive character where the plot just happens to him, but it's by design. He's a very woe is me, doomer type, and about 200 pages in another character essentially calls him out for being a passive little bitch and never doing anything to help himself. Am I gonna be able to trust the audience to understand that I know how to write a good character, and that him having things happen to him was on purpose and story driven?
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>>23924780
I may be retarded, but I struggle to understand what emotions characters are feeling from these non-verbal descriptions.
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>>23925390
writing a bad character on purpose doesn't make him not a bad character
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>>23925404
the point of the book is his transformation. after that point he becomes more of an active schemer after that point. his character arc is becoming more active.
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>>23925390
Never trust an audience. All audiences are full of retards.
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>>23925411
>after that point he becomes more of an active schemer after that point.
im so fucking stupid
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>>23925418
Nah, it happens. This is what beta readers are for.
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>>23925390
If you can hint the shift and do it at the right time, I don't see why not.
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>>23925422
>hint the shift
you mean like make a promise to readers who can pick up on his inaction that he's not gonna be as worthless as he is for the entire book?
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Do you ever make art of your characters, /wg/?
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>>23925431
i use ai
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Is there a /wg/ approved list of Do's and Don't's for writing erotic literature/smut? I trust you guys above anywhere else.
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>>23925426
Yeah.
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>>23925431
Yes but I'm a dogcrap artist
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>>23924712
What does this mean?
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>>23924583
dude stop pussyfooting about your fetish and write the damn thing
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>>23925431
I can't draw worth a rat's ass, so I sometimes use the two free daily drawings ChatGPT gives you to make some concept art. It's hit or miss, but generally not too bad.
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ai is great for concept art
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>>23925471
Which AI did that?
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>>23924583
>Am I saying that they'd fuck in this book? No, they probably wouldn't
That may crash and burn your story before you start. Are you planning for it to be a serious commentary about relationships? Then it's okay. But if you're writing it as fap material expect plenty of 1 star reviews. I've seen plenty where women have complained about the lack of sex in romance stories and deducted significant points. Only matters if you intend to sell it, of course.
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>>23925478
dall-e
>>
Are either of these grammatically correct?
>After a time, they came upon a miniscule clearing containing a little hut, both of which were smaller than any he’d ever seen that belonged to a witch.
>After a time, they came upon a miniscule clearing containing a little hut, both of which were smaller than any he’d seen belonging to a witch.
>>
>>23925518
"a miniscule clearing containing a little hut" is singular so your dependent clause starting with "both" is incorrect. It'd need to be
>After a time, they came upon a minuscule clearing and a little hut, both of which were smaller...
both versions of the end are fine
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>>23925518
I'd just say "minuscule clearing" sounds strange (it's minuscule with a U). When I hear that word I think of things around the size of an ant.
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>>23925518
Second one with the "any he’d seen belonging to a witch" flows a lot better, too.
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>>23925445
Why the hell would you trust /wg/? This place is unironically the -worst- writing forum I've seen. It's 99% beginners of various flavors. And worse, they act like they're authorities in whatever subject they're speaking on when they're definitively not.
I see so much "advice" here that's blatantly terrible. Happened just last thread with some dude talking to another anon about erotica, despite clearly not knowing how the genre worked in the slightest but 'giving advice' anyway. Lmao
>>
>>23925606
Which ones are better?
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>>23925613
Depends on the genre. I recommend seeking out author blogs or reading books on writing. But some niche communities are focused enough that you can find consistently good advice. /r/eroticauthors is unironically top tier since there's a number of regulars there who make a fulltime living writing erotica, plus there's a wiki/sidebar/whateverthefuck you call it filled with resources vetted by those professionals.
Most 'general' writing forums are terrible though. /wg/ is the worst of all of them. Only upside is anonymity, which is also the biggest downside. Please don't take advice from beginners, failures, the mentally ill, and so on--which is most of this thread. There's like 3 qualified (irregular) posters here, and you can't even tell who they are since, again, it's anon
>>
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I wrote 1000 words yesterday and 2000 words today, but neither of them were for the novel I need to finish first!
But at least I am getting better at relaxation so I can just write for a few hours at a time.
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>>23925620
And yet you're here
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>>23925659
>gotcha!
Yeah this thread is entertainment to me, not a resource, lol. I warn newcomers when they come in thinking people here have any idea how to write
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>>23924750
ANSWER ME
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>>23925663
I believe you, because you took less than two minutes to respond to a general that gets 5 posts an hour at cruising speed, so either you're really refreshing this thread and having a guffaw at every post or you've eaten so much sour grapes you poop purple.
>>
>>23925680
Hey man it sounds like you're taking this personally. I'm not a crab--I wish the best of luck to the amateurs and aspirational writers here. It's for their sake that I'm saying what needs to be said: taking advice from this thread is a horrible idea. People have no fucking clue what they're talking about.
>>
>>23925678
if your target audience says you're overusing metaphors and similes or being too poetic, then you probably are
What? Are you expecting some sort of calculation? 1 metaphor per page max? Don't be silly. It's subjective, and you either have to use your own judgment or get the judgment of someone you trust (or your target readers)
>>
I think I worked backwards, because in the last part of my story I've planned it so my characters would need to escort this child towards *that* place. I found a way to get the four different characters to agree to do this, each one having different reasons based on what happened previously and how their mentality changed due to events.
...But I don't know how I can make them realize they need to actually go there in the first place.
>>
I did the math and I've been writing (only counting the days I actually wrote) an average of 63 words a day. If I did just 250 I'd be more than halfway done the novel I'm working on. If I actually wrote every day I'd be almost 80% done. If I did 500 I'd be finished. I can't in good conscience write anything less than 250 words a day now
>>
I don't know what to name my characters so I look up the sexiest men's and women's names online to see what people find attractive, so they'll like my character more. My name keeps coming up at the top of the sexiest lists but I can tell you it's all bullshit. Not once has a women ever been interested in me or my name. I can't trust these lists at all.

What do you use to pick your names, guys?
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>>23925843
Depends on the genre. For fantasy or sci-fi I use fantasnamegenerator, but for stuff rooted in our world I just look up popular baby names from the year that the character was born and go from there. Hell, FNG even has real world names covered, so I'd just go there if you're really struggling.
>>
>>23925843
I think names are really important and should be something that is meaningful to you. I took from characters in other books and people who I've met irl
>>
>>23925620
>/r/eroticauthors
I'm checking this out, but it seems way more advanced than what I'm writing. They're advising a sex scene every chapter, detailing preparations, and usually kept to 10k words.

Mine's already 20k and there's not been any sex yet. I was holding it off for the finale. It's mostly a comedy involving lewdity that escalates little by little.
>>
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Working on my Halloween story for literotica.
>>
>Want to write a story about magic learning
>Try a "sorcerer's apprentice" kind of deal
>Mentor character ends up being a goddamn Mary Sue
>Try to course correct and up with discount Constantine
>Story already feels like an Invisibles rip-off
>Shift to a "magic school" setting and focus on the students
>Try my hardest to ground everything on occult practices and traditions as to avoid the Harry Potter comparison (haven't even read that since I was a kid)
>In world building limbo
>Can't decide whether to go all out with high fantasy, magitech and fuck "realism"
>Or go for a more subtle urban fantasy approach
>End up developing both settings
>Still unsatisfied with either
>Barely even developed any characters either way
Why didn't I stick with playing guitar as my creative outlet?
I fucking suck at writing.
>>
>>23926052
sounds like your brain is polluted with trash and as a result can only make trash
you need to exercise your mind in the same way you exercise your muscles: challenge it or it will atrophy
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>>23926070
Any suggestions on how to do that?
>>
>>23926077
read classics and eat vegetables
>>
>>23926083
not him, but I read classics almost exclusively and I'm pretty sure no one wants to read that style of writing these days. I love it, but modern society doesn't like to be challenged by anything, and having to spend five seconds re-reading a sentence they didn't "get" the first time will make them drop a book like a used tissue.
>>
>the furfag in my writing group got triggered by "the misogyny" in my submission
>the furfag who writes about seven foot tall blue wolves that talk like babies and are into blood play
>>
>>23926091
writing in a modern prose style is very easy
>>
>>23925484
>Are you planning for it to be a serious commentary about relationships?
I don't even know how you'd write something like that.
>>
>>23925460
Might start outlining today.
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>>23926142
I want to see the furry's writing
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>>23926142
Mental illness manifests in mysterious ways.
>>
>>23925066
there's a HOWTO pastebin linked in the OP
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>>23926142
This is why I will never join a writing group.
>>
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>>23925204
>>23925143
Sanderson couldn't even name his last book right (supposed to be KoW).
>>
>>23926274
I'll never join a writing group cause I'm retarded and can't write to save my life, we are not the same.
>>
>>23926190
I won't post his stuff, because FNASR. But I'll post these two clips because this is literally how his characters talked. I could hear these voices reading his story.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uuSTjn7Bn_A
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x7itNBV1cio
>>23926274
Honestly, I'd rather critique the furfag story over some of the other stuff that gets submitted. There's some Australian woman who submits the most boring stories imaginable. Like stories of a woman going around the mall waiting for a date. Stories of the aftermath of a breakup and the character is sad she has to move into her apartment alone. Stories of an old guy watching tv alone waiting for his wife to come back from work. All her characters have these intricate backgrounds and family histories and none of it fucking matters because all her stories are just people waiting around and I'M SICK OF YOUR FUCKING STORIES ELLEN. I'M SICK OF THEM. THEY'RE BORING AS FUCK. IT'S CLEAR YOU'VE NEVER BEEN CHASED BY A HOMELESS GUY WITH A MACHETE IN YOUR LIFE BECAUSE ALL YOUR STORIES HAVE INTERNAL CONFLICT. THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN FEELING SLIGHT EMBARRASSMENT BECAUSE OF A MISUNDERSTANDING OR MIDLIFE CRISES!

ONE DAY, ELLEN, ONE DAY, A HUNDRED YEARS FROM NOW, TWO HUNDRED YEARS FROM NOW, ANTHROPOLISTS WILL SAY "GEE I WONDER WHAT IT WAS LIKE BEING A MIDDLE-CLASS, 50 YEAR OLD, WHITE WOMAN IN THE EARLY 21ST CENTURY?" AND THEY WILL FIND GREAT VALUE IN HOW YOUR STORIES CAPTURED SOCIETY HERE AND NOW THROUGH YOUR PERSPECTIVE. BUT NO ONE WILL EVERY FIND LITERARY VALUE IN ANYTHING YOU'VE WRITTEN, YOU OLD WHORE!
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>>23926305
>There's some Australian woman who submits the most boring stories imaginable. Like stories of a woman going around the mall waiting for a date. Stories of the aftermath of a breakup and the character is sad she has to move into her apartment alone. Stories of an old guy watching tv alone waiting for his wife to come back from work. All her characters have these intricate backgrounds and family histories and none of it fucking matters because all her stories are just people waiting around and I'M SICK OF YOUR FUCKING STORIES ELLEN. I'M SICK OF THEM. THEY'RE BORING AS FUCK. IT'S CLEAR YOU'VE NEVER BEEN CHASED BY A HOMELESS GUY WITH A MACHETE IN YOUR LIFE BECAUSE ALL YOUR STORIES HAVE INTERNAL CONFLICT. THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN FEELING SLIGHT EMBARRASSMENT BECAUSE OF A MISUNDERSTANDING OR MIDLIFE CRISES!
>ONE DAY, ELLEN, ONE DAY, A HUNDRED YEARS FROM NOW, TWO HUNDRED YEARS FROM NOW, ANTHROPOLISTS WILL SAY "GEE I WONDER WHAT IT WAS LIKE BEING A MIDDLE-CLASS, 50 YEAR OLD, WHITE WOMAN IN THE EARLY 21ST CENTURY?" AND THEY WILL FIND GREAT VALUE IN HOW YOUR STORIES CAPTURED SOCIETY HERE AND NOW THROUGH YOUR PERSPECTIVE. BUT NO ONE WILL EVERY FIND LITERARY VALUE IN ANYTHING YOU'VE WRITTEN, YOU OLD WHORE!
1. I apologise on behalf of Australia. 2. There's a reason why there are few if any, popular Australian authors (we're mostly a country devoid of creativity). 3. I enjoy how angry you got, I think it's cool, I love getting angry at stuff like that.
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>>23926318
Woolston is Australian
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>>23926322
Literal who?
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>>23922797
I'll defintely keep an eye on these. I want to kick myself for trying to get into this right before NanoWriMo. The competition is going to be unrealistically stiff. A little demotivating. Hopefully I can whip something up upon December though.
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>>23926375
>NanoWriMo
Qrd?
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>>23925833
I don't know if this will work for other people, but it really helps me to keep in mind how achievable wordcount goals really are. Like, your 250 word-a-day requirement can be met in an hour if you only type 4 words per minute. Can you do 4 words in a minute? I bet you can. I bet you can even type more, like 8 for 500 in an hour, or 17 for 1000.
>>
25, 50 or 75 chapters, /wg/?
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>>23926453
Fuck it, 76.
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>>23926433
National Novel Writing Month. Happens every November and the goal is to write a story that's 50k words tops.
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>>23926460
Honestly how do you manage 50k words in one month? Like practically, when does the writing happen?
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>>23926463
I've done 23k words since Monday. Granted, I stayed up 41 hours at a stretch for a part of it and skipped some meals, but I was on a roll. Too bad it's too erotic for the contest, otherwise I'd win.
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When you begin a sentence with "Or" do you usually put a comma after it?
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>>23926460
Interesting, might give that a go.
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>>23926463
Begins on the eve of November 1st and ends on the twilight of the 30th. It's doable and it going on for 25 years is testament to that. Most I could do was 12k in a week. Never got to reach those numbers again, my brain was so smushed.
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>>23926455
Good
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>>23926484
I feel like you have to spend all year leading up to it planning and outlining everything in meticulous detail so when the timer starts you can just unleash without pausing to think about what to say. I have no idea how people just wing it.
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>Postquam exēmpta senpaiēs epulīs mēnsaeque remōtae, āmissōs longō sociōs sermōne requīrunt, spemque metumque inter dubiī, seu vīvere crēdant sīve extrēma patī nec jam exaudīre vocātōs.
'Fter famine's flung w/ foodstivities and the [refectory-]tables (are) remote, (the Aeneans) ask-after (their) MIA'd mates in an "All-Gone!-Quīn?!"-round-table-sans-table-caliber convo, fluctuating between fear 'n' faith, believing to themselves (that their buddies) are ballin, unless (they) "bit" the big-ones... and the ones-being-holla'd[-@] rn aint hearin' [it].
>Praecipuē pius Aenēās nunc ācris Orontī nunc Amycī cāsum gemit et crūdēlia sēcum fāta Lycī fortemque Gyān fortemque Cloanthum.
Beside-himself, at-present "Pietās" Aeneas particularly "Oh..."s the outcome of "Obeliscal" Orontes and the lethal luck of Lycus and "Girthy" Gyas and "Courageous" Cloanthus.

>Et jam fīnis erat, cum Juppiter aethere summō dispiciēns mare vēlivolum terrāsque jacentīs lītoraque et lātōs populōs, sīc vertice caelī cōnstitit et Libyae dēfixit lūmina rēgnīs.
And now (that episode) was end[-credits], since on the summit sky not-Zeus, zooming-into the water-caught-wind-catchers-pinion-pinned and the outspread soils and the beaches and broad peoples, thus froze on the north-pole of the aurora-borealis and focuses (his) (eye-)glows on the realms of Libya.
>Atque illum tālīs jactantem pectore cūrās trīstior et lacrimīs oculōs suffūsa nitentīs adloquitur Venus:
And Venus, the boo-hooing-er, and topped-up peepers pétillantin' with drops, utters to him, (Jove,) javelining such concerns on (his) [own] core:*

* Maybe if I was doing fewer of these foolish footnotes I would have realized "pars" was the subject back in line 212. Rēcte:
>pars in frusta secant...
part into-pieces cuts...
a part (of the party) 'ctomies (the entrails) inta toothpick-targets...
So sorry, "True Blue"-now-"Obeliscal" Orontes, maybe at another point.
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>>23926463
It happens during the month. I thought that was rather obvious.
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>>23926460
I wonder if I'll do any writing. I've made an account and have created a new project but my head feels empty. Wanna be buddies on there?
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>>23926470
Commas are for separating clauses, not dramatic pauses.
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>>23926535
NTA but I use them for both.
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Wuxia is easier to write than Xianxia. Prove me wrong.
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>>23923081
Have you read a book before?
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>>23926541
Huh? You speakin' some kind of foreign?
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>>23926529
I'm not planning on NaNoWriMo but I am planning on one of the magazines listed above, namely the Aismov one. You should look into some of those too.
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I am done with my first draft, that I plan to submit to a youth focused novel contest. I am a little bit worried about what I wrote. I touch upon a lot of negative stuff that is affecting young people. From loneliness, depression, mental problems, suicidal thoughts, cynicism about life and future, and so on. And even though I went about it in an absurd and weird way, with a lively and energetic plot (I wanted to avoid it being a slow burning and too self serious melodramatic), I ended it on a real downer note. Nobody learned anything, nobody had some magical revelation or character growth. And I gave no answers to any problems. The lonely characters stay lonely, the cynical characters manage to infect others with their mindset, the depressed character is still scared and depressed, and life goes on with no answers or resolutions. I am worried about all this, because youth novels usually have to provide some sort of answers or morals or something. But I just wrote 60 pages worth of cynical nihilism, with no upside to it. And like who is this gonna help or inspire? I think I should take an axe to the third act, and give everyone hopeful resolutions.
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>>23926548
It sure would be nice to be able to make money off of those.
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>>23926563
Writing when money is a possibility is a motivator like none other, I don't think anyone can deny that. It shouldn't be the only reason to write because it's nice comforting feeling just imaging there could be readers out there who love the kind of stuff you as a author might enjoy, literally the mantra of write what you want to read. But man, 700 bucks for 7k words? If and when I whip up a story and submit it I'm putting in my two weeks at my dead end slop job the moment I get a paycheck. It ain't no crime to dream, baby.
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>>23926584
>write what you want to read.
I can't even write what I don't want to read.
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>>23926535
Is or a clause?
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I'm genuinely lost. I feel lost your guys' biggest issue when it comes to writing is worrying that what you write will be bad, but my issue is worrying that I won't be able to write more than 2 pages of stuff before running out of ideas and not knowing where to go.
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1/?

For quite some time I had become known as a local eccentric; particularly one of the “media hoarder” variety, the kind of man of poor genetics and crude vocabularities who were nose-breathers and “ex-academics” and chain-smokers. Their tapes and books and posters and autographed headshots all yellowed and near-waxy from the accumulation of cigarette-matter and dust and god-forbid: mold.

One man, who I will call “Jack,” became obsessed with a very old book almost totally black with mold on every page and which shot out bizarrely-wooden plumes of God-knows-what species of fungi, with their corpsen exhalations sounding vaguely humanoid and decrepit in the way a very sick and very old man would sound in his final hours as his young son begged him to just take the pills and that he’d feel so much better…

I collect videotapes. Everyone does; following a near-kinetic format-war in which the VCD threatened to wipe out nearly every facet of the home entertainment industry, despite the fact that VCDs are still used in grey-market circles as proxies for dark-alley material, accessible only through transcoding between encrypted tape-signals and VCD video-signals; I personally do not ever keep a VCD if I’ve seen it and have no need for it otherwise. They’re bad news. Cops don’t mess with tape-guys because they actually like us and can see right through us, and they seem to all understand that most of us simply want to lurk throughout the unknown and flirt with the lurid. Some can probably relate, of course.
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>>23926623

2/?

My brother is a cop. Not a fed, but a cop, and more like a fireman at that —- my brother John quite literally saved a kitten from a tree last week, and was featured in the local gazette. My brother John came into my office one day sweating and in a distinct kind of panic I had come to recognize during my brief fixation on epilepsy and medical tapes related to seizures and epileptic disorders; the panic to which I refer being the post-seizure – grand-mal – panic, of utter confusion and vulnerability and a brain-blasted feeling of physical exhaustion and dehydration and distant emotions from forgotten dreams emerging from the fugue of it all as they call out for people who are long dead or ask their children what their name is and if their parents are here. One man could not recognize his own face, and could not seem to wrap his head around what a “meer” could be and why it is being shoved in his face, why is this incredible but disturbing holographic image so important and what did this man do to deserve his sweating, paniced visage to be the mascot for this strange Thing?

I digress. My brother was panicked, and I noticed that his gun had fallen onto the floor as he walked in. I can’t quite remember what he said, it was all such blurry impressions of human speech and emotional affect that I was too busy in my own head trying to imagine what kind of drug he had been given or what kind of crime he had committed or what kind of image he had seen or anything, something.
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>>23926433
natl. nov. wri. mo.
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>>23926627

3/?

I digress. My brother was panicked, and I noticed that his gun had fallen onto the floor as he walked in. I can’t quite remember what he said, it was all such blurry impressions of human speech and emotional affect that I was too busy in my own head trying to imagine what kind of drug he had been given or what kind of crime he had committed or what kind of image he had seen or anything, something.

“John, as your brother who loves you, can you do me a favor?”

He nodded and then frantically swatted sweat beads in futility as they started to plop onto his crotch area.

“I really need you to sit down and just, feel that new chair I got and let me know what’s up, because John, I’m being honest, you know how my ears and my brain are, I can’t understand a word you’re saying.”

I didn’t know if this was the right thing to say, but he obliged nonetheless – and not before slamming an unlabeled tape on my desk, in a large plastic evidence bag.

“Watch it.”
I was stunned at how forceful and pointedly he demanded that I immedaitely watch that tape. Every part of my head screamed HELL NO but as brothers? We were in this together, and I simply had to watch it, regardless of his demeanor or insistence or the terrorized state in which he seemed to have found himself in upon watching it.
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>>23926629

4/?

And so, I watched it. It started with webs of oozing fifth-sixth gen. Distortions and wobbles and such, rude little blasts of static ripping sounds and vague suggestions of humanoid figures slowly coalescing into actual people; an older man, another man and three teenaged girls at first. All of them in some kind of attic… Very wooden and creepy, but they all seemed nonchalant and generally OK.

“Y-you know, y-y-you know there’s not-n-not-n-n-n no-n………… There. Is. Not. Just—-”

“Five people, yeah. There’s at least six; the five in frame and a cameraperson.”

He took a deep breath, lit a cigarette, chugged an entire bottled water and belched maybe thirty times as the scene played out in a very eerie way.

First, there didn’t seem to be any sort of framerate and the lensing seemed… exotic, perhaps broken. The shutter angle seemed to be rotating steadily, causing bizarre jitters and several lightbulb-flickers to morph into violent pulses before locking back into place.

Second, there was no audible dialog, despite all five of them appearing to talk as they smoked filterless cigarettes and played poker on a table which was quite literally on it’s last legs and seemingly waterlogged or ruined. No voices could be heard, but there was music, and it was diegetic, which didn’t mean much considering what consumer-grade can do but – still – …

“John, how long is this tape?”
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>>23926630

5/5

He froze. I slowly picked up his third cigarette he hadn’t even lit yet and took it for myself so I could simply just lock-in and watch this entire thing. I knew just from seeing the box it came in that it was one of the high-quality SP tapes that couldn’t shoot more than an hour (whereas the longest and lowest-quality tapes could go as far as nine).

The music stopped. Voices could now be heard. The camera is tossed aside rather clumsily, and much of the scene is now obscured by a pillow (which also drowns out the voices, although they are still very much audible and quite loud considering).

Man #1: You know, you girls are pretty smart.
Girl #1: Yeah. But how would you know. It’s not like you go to fuckin’ college with us.
Girl #2: I’m not smart. I’m a bitch. I make money moves, bitch-ass.
Man #2: Oh, shut up. Can you girls get rid of her? She’s just terrible… Like some little fat bitch you have to deal with at Burger King who doesn’t know what mayonnaise is and…
Girl #2: You a faggot, bruh, get this faggot-boy little-dick bitch—-

CUT TO:

The same room. The same people. But nothing else is the same. And there seems to be more people. But not quite different people. The same people. But impressions and spectral loops and ghosts of each person all mingling throughout the scene —- all walking with an extremely rigid and robotic stilted step —- and a camera obscura filling up the scene as a lens seems to detach from not just the camera itself but the scene altogether, which causes a cascade of lensing-events and repetitive-spectral motions to envelop and unfold like an undulating visual image-lung.

At this point, my brother was curled into a ball, using his thumbs to close his eyes and his index fingers for his ears.

What the tape cut to next is what I believe to be what spooked my brother into such a state, and as I type this right now I am overcome with emotions of terror and a feeling that I should not be watching this.

My brother fled the room as ten seconds of blackness gave way to the scene.
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>>23926142
Imagine being in a writing group with a furfag and this incel and watching their exchange of fire.
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>>23926584
>Writing when money is a possibility is a motivator like none other, I don't think anyone can deny that.
I can. Selfish quest for profits and art don't mix. Thinking about money poisons your soul and creativity,
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I had an interesting idea for a villainous faction: They're a nation of conquistadors who have the ability to pass their memories to their offspring when they die. They have a strict caste system, and each generation of soldiers has the combined experience of all of their ancestors, tracing back hundreds of years. The same is true of each generation of scientists, statesmen, craftsmen, etc.

They can only share their memories with one child, however, so there is a lot of scheming and backstabbing between siblings for who gets to inherit their fathers' memories.
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Tonight, half a year since reading the text I'd been working on, I cracked it open for a peek. Stopped after two paragraphs because—and I just couldn't believe it—it was so great that the whole "knowing you're a good writer"-thing was—IS seriously messing me up. I'm making this post because I honestly don't know what to do now. inb4
>post work
Maybe one day, but that's the thing—I only ever write for myself; I have only ever practiced and improved at writing for ME and me ALONE. THAT's the only person I've ever been truly trying to impress; I remember middle-school me wanting to scribble about absolutely anything that came to mind and somehow be able to turn it into semiotic gold, and now I'm veritably there and it's very weird.
Don't get me wrong—It's super pleasing to be able to express one's self so adroitly, sorta like how it feels innately good intelligently scrambling a videogame character across the screen like speedrunners do, violently ping-ponging your avatar back-and-forth between the boundaries of the world and maybe even employing a few game-breaky glitches here and there to get you to your goal faster than should be allowed, but in the end, after all the credits roll, no matter how gud u r, it's all still just empty pixels flickering low to high and back again; your highscore is hollow because your sense of accomplishment disappears when you inevitably have to turn the display off and see yourself reflected through the now-blank canvas. Self-reflection is the death of outward action, and nothing is more self-reflexive than this.
Another major aspect of why I feel so aimless is that I also have no impetus whatsoever to wirte/publish a bestseller or get paid for this skill I now seem to have; I am a person of very strong moral principles that preclude me from ever leveraging the things I create—no matter how frivolous they may be—for clout or pecuniary gain, especially when I'm doing just fine socioeconomically.
I don't even know what I'm really asking here... I feel like a character in television serial who just had their apotheosis-moment and is now about to get killed offscreen to raise the stakes because the showrunners have no clue what to do with someone who's as arced-out and tetherless to the extent that I am.
Maybe I should just focus on what I actually want NEXT in life and use clickity-clack as a means to get there without destroying my values or myself in the process... 'Course this presumes I actually currently WANT anything from life. Fuck. Rant = false;
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>>23926681
PM me some samples and I'll tell you what I think.
Discord: JohnWoo4#3338
>>
This is my first time writing anything aside from high school nonsense. Constructive criticism requested. Just the first paragraphs of a novel:

The sun sets below the flat fields of the American Midwest. Trees are very far in the distance, only around the creeks spread a few miles apart. Homes sparsely dot the plains, roughly one every square mile. The view of grain elevators and small towns looms over the horizon. Once, there was noise so loud from the grain dryers, the farm machinery, and trucks during the harvest season. Trains would roar across the flats, miles away. Cars and trucks traveling down the highway would pierce the air.

A long shadow is cast of a motorcycle with a rider and passenger traveling southbound. A deep thump intrudes the otherwise normal silence. Years old corn and basedbeans decay next to the road. The sun gently lowers behind the horizon, and twilight gently grips the sky. Vega infiltrates the sky, along with some of her sisters. The passenger has a radio next to his ear.

Wearing only jeans, a leather jacket, and goggles, he has a radio next to his ear with one hand, and the other gripping the seat. As they travel, a sizzling sound fills the radio. The passenger taps the shoulder of the driver three times. The rider, clad in only flannel, blue jeans, goggles, and boots drops a gear and twists to full throttle. He gets to the maximum speed of around 100mph and continues this way for a few minutes. Finally, the bike is slowed down, and they make a turn to the west on a long gravel driveway.

The pair reach the end. A small residence in the middle of the field. Four minutes have gone by since the radio interference. The property is circular, and consists of an old camper trailer, a barn full of equipment and decrepit machinery, a chicken coop, and a large pile of metal scrap. Attached to the trailer is a metal enclosure, like a garage. The pair park the motorcycle in the garage. The ground is damp inside. The kickstand sinks an inch into the mud, but they arrived in time. The two slid the door closed and opened a thick steel door in the back of the garage. They circle around and go into the trailer.

They enter the trailer, which was new some sixty years ago. The furniture was heavily used. Seating was worn through to reveal yellow foam pieces, held together only by a few threads. The tables were worn from extensive use. A microwave, built into the cabinets, showed no display of time. A flatscreen television with a large crack in the upper center that spread across the entire TV sits on a stand, but a radio sits in front of it. An old tube radio, a Zenith All American 5 from 1957. The wood was worn and dry. The bakelite dials still functioned, however. The driver walks to it immediately and turns it on.

A steady, warm humming noise fills the silence as the tubes warm up. The driver opens a closet and withdraws a milk jug filled with an amber liquid.
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>>23926689
>PM me some samples and I'll tell you what I think.
Sorry, no offense, but I don't talk to people online (except here) or anywhere irl for that matter.
And even more no-offense: No matter what you think of my work, I'm my only audience member I'm ever going to care about.
When the ability to do whatever you want's already been reached, all criticisms just become exhortations on "what ought to written", and I get enough of that away from the screen.
I'm just venting, anon, but thanks for caring.
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>>23926706
Glad I posted. Somehow 4chans format makes my repetitions easier to see. I will correct, but criticize anyway.
>>
i can be such an air head sum times by 2
fighting your club and what lies beneath
two thoughts lost in one ocean
drops that wont mix with the scene
like liquid bubbles watertight no air

too dense to float up and disappear
anticipate the water dropping us instead
this precipitation makes our drips persperate
emptying my head gets me lost in thought
but focusing on us makes me care about (you)

now for an other 1
or in other words numbered
times 4 part 2

I have a split personality harmony
I dont trust psychiatry entirely
these days they call it Dee Eye Dee
dont get me too wrong
they are barking up the right tree
I just know they have the wrong dog
the one they need must be busy loving God

they think the trauma is the cause
the secret is its actually an ingredient
God hasnt made my mind miss a take
God works with beauty and meaning
not the idea that something real is fake
my minds made up this gift is not a mistake

one more times three
part three third part finale
third × the charm =3

my case is apparently far from atypical
minimal memory loss packets locked
its a case of im you! your me? their us.
I have one or two other than us whos we
being under this so much water has me zapped
im so glad we dont need short circuits to breathe

relieved assured shore leave submarine deep diver inch nails need a driver fetch me my nine in a curved line hung high hugs triforce three me to stop hole in shot up came down never worth curtains closed brain storm showers on or off
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>>23926678
That's interesting, the mechanics of that need to be worked out though
>Does the memory transfer happens automatically when the father dies or is there a need for a certain ceremony (or at least for the offspring to be present)
>Is this limited to parents and childs of the same sex, like fathers and sons? If it isn't, does that mean the society is particularly egalitarian?
Off the cuff, I'd probably try to angle the story through the eyes of a bastard child who suddenly gets the memories of his nobleman's father, including some state secrets
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>>23926708
NTA but you sound insufferable.
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I found this comment. Is this true? I don't see the big deal.
>I call a cock a cock (or a dick, which lots of editors make writers take out because allegedly readers hate that word)
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>>23926738
>NTA but you sound insufferable.
That's all you got for me? I thought this was a writing thread. I sounded exactly as intended and you got filtered because I meant you to, because if I wanted a whiff of the stale dogfood rattling around your skull I could sniff it at any other board on this site EXCEPT /r9k/ (that is, unless of course you've learned to keyboard smash at the end of every one of your rote replies, which are the very definition of the word 'generic').
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>>23926776
You're only proving me right.
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>>23926706
Alright, some dialogue. I am not sure how to approach this properly:
He twists open the lid, and the sweet smell of honey fills the still and stuffy air. He lifts it with his thumb and elbow and takes a few large chugs. He then twists once clockwise, and holds it to the passenger, “Want some?” the driver says, raising his eyebrows.

“No, thank you. I brought my own hooch.” says the passenger, pulling a flask from his back pocket. He unscrews the cap and raises it toward the driver and takes a swig. “Let’s drink and see what’s on the radio,” he raises the flask to cheer again and takes another swig. He then screws the lid tightly and pats his pockets, “Hey, you have any smokes on you? I must have left mine at home.”

The driver pulls a pack from his flannel, “Yeah no problem, just get me next time,” and tosses the pack to the passenger, “Need a light?”

“I have a lighter at least,” the passenger says dejectedly, “Let’s see what the radio says.” He nods toward the worn-out couch, and they sit. The driver places the jug on the table. The passenger pulls the upturned cigarette from the pack and rolls it across the table to the driver, then pulls out another one and flips the third into the pack. He ignites with his lighter as the driver ignites his with a match. The driver then lights a few tea candles with the match.

The passenger takes his first drag and exhales, “What is it with you and the lucky cigarette?” He rests his arm on the armrest and looks curiously at the driver.

“Superstition I guess. I’ve always done it.” He takes a drag and exhales, using his left hand. He rests his arm on the back of the sofa and takes a chug from the amber liquid.

“Sounds dumb to me, what would a turned cigarette have anything to do with your life?” The passenger raises his eyebrow and takes another drag.

“Fuck if I know, just tradition or something,” the driver takes another drag, “What, does it bother you?”

“Just a weird thing to be picky about,” the passenger then takes another swig from the flask, “The storm is at its peak it seems. Also, I’ve always wondered, why do you have so many tea candles? Do you take bubble baths and sniff incents or something?”

Penetrating the blinds of the trailer’s small windows, green and purple lights are visible. The only lights in the trailer are the tea candles and the tubes from the radio. The driver cackles and says, “Remember that Nintendo Wii that came out awhile ago? My damn cat chewed through the bar thing and I read you could use candles since it’s infrared or some shit. I bought a ton on Amazon for like fifteen bucks ten years ago and the bars were hard to get ahold of,” the Driver chuckled and took another drag, “Besides, they came in handy right?”
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>>23926780
“Fuck yeah they are,” the Passenger snorted and took a drag from his cigarette, “Wonder if anyone is on the air yet? Storm ought to be over soon, yeah?”

“Man, no on the air has anything good to say. Why listen?”

“Information, I guess. It is always good to get perspective.”

“Fuck it, finish these smokes and see who’s on.”

“Alright,” the Passenger takes a drag and a swig from his flask, “Those fuckers never sleep do they?”

“I swear they have a collective sleep or some shit. One of them is always on the air and somehow the rest get the fill. Do they have people listening for them or some stupid shit?” The Driver takes another chug from his jug, “You sure you don’t want any of this?”

“I just like whiskey man, not into that mead and all that. Too sweet.”

“What ever you say.” The driver takes another chug and a drag to follow, “What frequency is uh... that one conspiracy dude? He’s always funny.” He puts out his cigarette in the ashtray and heads to the radio.

“I think he’s on uhh... 122?” The passenger says unsure, and drags his cigarette, then puts it out.

“Well, we can find him.” The driver turns the bakelite dial. Lots of static and he hears a voice come up, “Well, something is here... Somewhere.” He continues to turn the dial and finally gets it settled. A high pitched and upbeat voice comes in clearly.

“-and that’s why the right caused this! They’re that way you know! They would have slaves if they could!” The broadcaster cackles in a weird laugh, “They wanted this you know!” the broadcaster then howls like a wolf, “Ahahaha! None of this BULLSHIT happened when democrats were in office I tell you that! Ahahah!”
>>
>>23926783

The passenger rolls his eyes and takes another swig, “This fucking guy, man. Funny but annoying... Find someone else?”

“Yeah, no shit,” says the driver. He turns the dial awhile and finds a deeper voice that is slow and concise and dials it in, “Aw fuck this guy.”

“-st another way for the Democrats to blame the Republicans! Back in my day we didn’t have any of this bullshit regulations. We just built shit and got it done. Democrats fucked that all up!”

“Ugh, let me find someone else,” says the driver, “Surely someone decent has to be around.” The Driver turns the dial some more and finds an even deeper voice. He dials it in.

“Man it’s the fuckin Jews. Israel! They blew us up with hurricanes and thunderstorms and now they control the fucking sun, man! The fucking SUN! The very thing that gives us life is fucking up society! The Jews are immune to it and Israel is living str-”

The driver changes the dial and says, “Fuck this shit man, these people are all kinds of fucking retarded.”

“It’s that or the government AI bullshit. Let’s just turn it off and play some cards or something.” The passenger says, as he lights up another cigarette.

“Sounds cool. Hungry? Want anthing to eat?”

“I don’t care, what ever you got.

“Alright, I have some deer jerky.”

“Hell yeah. Hey let’s see if Neil is on the radio and get him over? Jamming would be fun.”
>>
>>23926777
>You're only proving me right.
You're only proving me right.
>>
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>Female book title
>Male protagonist
Devilish
>>
>>23926731
>Does the memory transfer happens automatically when the father dies
Yes. It's like when Issac gives his blessing to Jacob in Genesis.
>Is this limited to parents and childs of the same sex, like fathers and sons?
Quite the opposite. Since these guys are villains, I figured women would be treated as breeding stock.
>>
fine i'll take care of it my shelf life expired
too much of not enough of the sweet stuff
you salted my accidentally thought it was sugar
shoulda thought throws a fit cant fit those fears
i need to ransom these ghosts of the past to make room for more orphaned hostages
addicted to aspiration so i switch hardmode to easy
lets split up gang stockholm syndrome needs a new reason

all you breathe is water no gasping for air all you can grasp is i dont care i think i only think i can i think i can i think i can
im gonna be heard even if i have to type it out for you and use the voice in your head instead
desperate for your verdict not interested in opinions
im not a sellout i wont sell out in exchange for an in

feelings cause problems but thinking only kills you softly spread thin across the page where within tears dry off my heart strings wear thin need a harp transplant my pumps wont puppet enough lies around my body losing excuses fast need a defribulator to set me straight a buzzkill to quarantine this island and shutter it one more time need a coin for this one more new ride until the next one more time
>>
>>23926907
>Quite the opposite.
I don't get it, because from what you're telling it seems to be the case with a very patriarchial way of things.
>>
>>23926990
Sorry, I meant in regards to your egalitarian comment.
>>
This is an old sketch called The Trap Door:

"I am not a man, a woman, a business or a disembodied voice conjured by some demon... I am a legal and economic entity, a series of trusts and bonded escrow schemes called the Trap Door which has, as you see now, been opened only to reveal your curiosity will be rewarded for confronting me, the Monster."

The voice spoke out, projected from the conical projection of plant-like "rings" of tightly-interwoven rocks and various forms of tar, pitch and amber all barely mixed into some unholy and fairly effective paste. A tiny light was masterfully cut in the ceiling which projected a magnificently prismic camera obscura effect all along the cave, and in observing all this it'd hit me that the shape protruding from the wall was, in fact, a sundial. So peculiar, so hidden...!

"Hello? Young man?"

I stood up straight.

"Did you build this?"

And then, most unnaturally, it replied back the very same, as if some kind of ancient mechanical parrot with a self-recorded wax cylinder contraption was playing back the question I'd just asked.

"I am sorry for that," the voice - the Trap Door, uttered, "I am not allowed to answer questions with the question itself. But I have a loophole, only possible now that you've opened me and initiated such a furious cascade of events outside of the cave. I can now bend and break all kinds of rules, and just as you opened the door I burst out into what could conservatively be deduced as utter pure creation and before the door itself had even cracked, in that impossible sliver of a moment where a door is open and opening but not opened, it is that sinister margin in which I rendered this cone, as a sort of mouthpiece... You are going to leave this place, and in every step enact that very moment of divine genesis in the ways which you see appropriate. I am not going to leave this place, which you might foolishly call something else. And you are not allowed to leave yet. Until the ruddy pitch has begun to drip, only then will I urge for solitude. To be awake, young friend!"

I didn't know what to say. I was a bit annoyed by now - he seemed to be full of himself. The scene around me was so beautiful and this thing was not respecting my solitude, and so I left. Even though I could hear the voice crying out for me as I stumbled out of that reeking and deceptive midden which, to my knowledge, had not yet been discovered by any groups or government bodies who would have otherwise made claim (only in name only, of course) to the various passages and rooms and tunnels. This is what they do, and yet besides the ingenious fellow who installed the subtle and mesmeric camera obscure in that vast main room it appears there are only two human men that have ever possibly been in that wondrous, and possibly a third - the man or thing speaking from the cone in the wall.. The man who I will come back for later to see if this is not yet another cruel prank on my gym class tormentor's behalf…
>>
How do you know you’re good enough to start writing? I wouldn’t want to waste time being bad at it.
>>
>>23927028
Start off being bad, write, and get good. You don't play video games being good automatically do you? You don't golf by just being good to start do you? You don't. You take forever to beat the bell gargoyles, and you take forever to beat Queelag. You take forever to drive consistently. You take forever to chip. Writing is no different.
>>
>>23927028
You can't get good enough unless you write. Write write write, that's all you can do to hone your skills. Also read, read a lot, but mostly write.
>>
>>23926997
Kek, trying to passive voice and immediately having to switch it to active and then soon after confirm it's a man. American English detected
>>
>>23927028

Oh yeah 8-)
>>
>2000+ words on chapter 1
What do you guys think?
>>
>>23926622
I think the issue for me is indecisiveness after the debut publication. To make a series out of one story or just pump out a number of standalone short stories, in the latter's case primarily for magazines. I see novel series like Honor Harrington, Legend of the Galactic Heroes, and Vorkosigan Saga and the anxiety just tightens its grip more by the day, and as such I feel too paralyzed actually writing. I can say with a semblance of confidence I'm not too creativity bankrupt but the fear of keeping the momentum keeps me from writing again, from non-commercial to commercial. I've had experience writing 3 volumes for one story on Royal Road (up to 400k words) but in hindsight I didn't have a concrete grasp on things like the hero's journey and it was so amateurish and written in a way that it was just shock value and cliffhangers (given the serial nature). It's haunting me I can't finish it nor bring myself to rewrite it—hopefully in a more commercial matter. Good luck anon, this blogpost went on longer than I imagined but I have no one to turn to bar rambling to AI. Honestly maybe I just should just ramble to AI.
>>
Is it a bad idea to just channel all my negative, horny, aggressive feelings into writing? I'm trying to find a healthier way to cope than talking to people about the same issues over and over again. I want to find a way to live out my fantasies and dangerous thoughts that's healthy.
>>
>>23927294
It's a bit short but not that weird
>>
>>23926792
No, no. You proved ME right, only.
>>
I'm submitting to an international short story prize in a couple days. It's prepped and ready, and it's gotten good feedback in my workshops. I'm worried my style is naturally too autistic but this piece seems way more normie but with bits of flair.

You lads got any tips or tricks or final touches I gotta do? I want to get shortlisted or better in this contest, more than anything else in the world.
>>
>>23927629
If it's done, it's done. Don't mess with it. Trust yourself, put it down, and start working on something else.
>>
>>23922180
Is posting erotica too much in this general or board?
>>
>>23927629
Just hail mary it. If it's all proofread, edited, and all that jazz there's not much you can do on your part. All that is left to do is start praying to one of the sky fairies or Buddha.
>>
>>23927543
>No, no. You proved ME right, only.
No, no. You proved ME right, only.
See how easy it is to emulate you? Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V.
Enjoy always being that weasely little snickerer whose only contribution continues to be "no, u"—it's a perfect fit, given your limited abilities.
You wouldn't go any further anyway, because to truly put your finger on WHY I'm chosing to sound so "insufferable" right now is to admit that you're just a dimwit.
>>
>>23927634
Honestly, thank you for saying that. I've been working obsessively on this piece for more than a year, driven primarily by the desperate, perhaps unhealthy desire to prove myself in these contests. I just want a piece of mine to find some public recognition for my literary fiction, and I've been on this for two years now. I just want something positive to happen so I can finally rest and move on.

I digress. You are right. It's done. This piece of done. I'll just give it a final light read tomorrow and send it in.
>>
>blow through my smutfic in a matter of days
>nearing the end and consider publishing it
>suddenly massive writer's block
>too much pressure now

Should've just kept it to myself.
>>
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I chat about my favorite niche books with chatgpt since theres no one else, or my favorite things. Now my problem is this, I already have great ideas, creative ones because I like to play on my own with them.

But even then ChatGPT has opened my mind to things U actually hadnt considered with a lot of learning. Now I feel guilty, what if someone fi ds out should I play with one of those bits of idea anr call me a fraud?
>>
>>23927696
anon please get a grip and relax on the drinking
t. drank 2 shots of suntory whiskey and its only 11am
>>
>>23927696
>>23927698
nta but this post reminded me of the whiskey ive hidden in my car. gonna be a fun afternoon
>>
>>23927696
I don't know what you're saying, but 90% of current literature is trash, so just by raw statistics chances are yours will be better.
>>
>>23927654
Nuh-uh.
>>
How do you know when you should give up writing? I worry I’m wasting my time with this crap. I don’t know what I’d do otherwise, though. Play video games?
>>
Just had a fag and a coffee in the shower and knocked back a snifter. I'm ready to powershit words and think things square minds wouldn't dare.
>>
>>23926460
50k words minimum, not tops, you fool.
>>
>>23927732
>How do you know when you should give up writing?
When you worry you're wasting your time.
>>
>>23927746
Weird. Won't the coffee spill if you're having gay sex at the same time? Won't you get water in it if that shower is open too?
>>
>>23927772
Okay then. Time to give up on my goblin story (you people hated it, anyway, since it was genreslop) and enjoy more video games.
>>
>>23927778
Both of those problems only exist for the inept.
I am me, you see. Issues of skill are foreign things.
>>
>>23926706
sounds more like you're writing for a screenplay or something. what is the point of all this description? it's unlikely that you are going to grab interest with this kind of opening. long descriptive passages can work if they are filled with insight (think of steinbeck for example), reflecting some expertise or wisdom. otherwise they are just going to put a reader to sleep.
>>
>>23927819
those are not "long descriptive passages" have you ever read a book before? christ
>>
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I'm going at this supernatural whodunit the wrong way.
>I have most of the plot planned out (they go there, they learn that, they decide to do this), except the stuff that kickstart the plot (the murder itself)
>I try to go at it in reverse chronological order, like "okay, I need them to understand this, how do I make them", but I get stuck because there's nothing to builds to, because I don't know yet why this murder has occured. This isn't completely literal, I have a pretty good idea about why the guy was murdered, I just didn't put it into words.
The problem, as far as I can tell, is that my foundations are shakies. Clues and who will find them, that can be figured our later. What I need is to answer the question
>Whut happened?

What I should stick to, therefore, is this
>Write out what actually happened before the story. Key points stating the reason for the death particularly
>Focus on the major milestones in the plot
>When I'm starting to plan the investigation, constantly remind myself I should have my characters act logically to the new information (for them), so they can organically move up the chain to the truth.
>>
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I made $10 from kindle book sales this week. I can comfort myself with the thought that I'm doing better than many traditionally published authors out there. It warms my small, cold soul.
>>
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>>23926706
Your passage is written in present tense, which makes it read rather awkwardly and is the reason that other guy compared it to a screenplay. This is how the set-dressing for their scripts is written, so it feels like you're declaring the arrangement of a setting, rather than describing the eventuation of certain events.
Following his train of thought, here is Steinbeck for comparison.
>>
>>23927909
That's 1 chicken big mac
>>
Hey guys this is probably a retarded question but I am a retarded person. I'm writing an essay and I'm citing a quote from the book which starts on one page and ends on the next. Do I put both pages on the citation?
>>
>>23928052
Yes. If the quote spanned pages 90 to 91 you would write 'pp. 90-1' as the page reference.
>>
>>23928058
Well I'm in an awkward situation because it actually spanned from pages 59 to 60. Do I go (Pages 59-0) or (Pages 59-60)
>>
>>23928064
59-60 in that case.
>>
>>23928078
Thanks bro
>>
Should I include a radical native american terrorist in my story or is that racist? She isn't a villain if that matters
>>
>>23928115
I like Geronimo when he's not a one-dimensional noble savage.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L6O6sM2Shok
>>
>>23926554
I decided not to redo the ending. I'll keep it as I feel.
>>
>>23928115
Race should have nothing to do with it. If you are feeling intimidated into not writing her as you want then they have already won.
>>
So my MC has sex with this woman and after she finally tells him her name. He says it's beautiful, she disagrees and says it's "nerdy." What compliment do women want to hear in response? I thought about having him say it was a "smart" or "intelligent" name, but I'm not sure that's really the right thing.
>>
>>23928355
Women prefer compliments over things they have control over. Tie it over to something she actively chose rather than something which was chosen for her.
>>
>>23928414
I didn't know that, thanks. But in this case I'm not sure how to do that, since the focus is on the name. He says she's beautiful and all the typical stuff but she's self conscious over her name and he needs to say something to put her at ease over it.
>>
>>23922797
based will look into rather then slaving away on a novel that isn't going anywher
>>
>>23927639
there's a writing thread in /trash/ for that
>>
>>23927525
Should I edit it? How many words should I write?
>>
>>23927294
I usually get 1,500 for my chapters.
>>
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>"O quī rēs hominumque deumque aeternīs regis imperiī et fulmine terrēs, quid meus Aenēās in tē committere tantum, quid Troēs potuēre, quibus tot fūnera passīs cūnctus ob Italiam terrārum clauditur orbis?
Yoo-hoo! (You) who doms t. doodahs of both the deities and the doo-doo-dwellers with infinities of impetus and (who) jump-scares with the shock-javelin, WHAT abundance (could) my Aennie commit on you? [4thatmatter,] WHAT could the Trojans?! To whom—so-many cataclysms [already] caught—on-account-of the clays of Italy, the whole-unmitigated blue-marble is [now] [le cock-]blockaded?
>Certē hinc Rōmānōs ōlim volventibus annīs, hinc fore ductōrēs revocātō ā sanguine Teucrī, quī mare, quī terrās omnīs diciōne tenērent, pollicitus.
Fr, as the annuals annulate-by, from-this-cause SPQRs (will be), from-this-place would be padrones by the un-amnesia'd plasma of the Teucri-kin, who the drink—who all coasters (they) may be gripin' in (their) governance—(all-that) [lest I more mourn, Jupe-daddy,] (you) (is) pinky-sworn.
>Quae tē, genitor, sentenia vertit?
[So,] what [stupid-]stance swerves you (from all this), sire?
>>
Has anyone made the decision to pull their story (established, completed, dropped or what have you) from a webnovel site like RoyalRoad and replace it with a stub so you can republish/rewrite it commercially? Is it an immoral unethical thing to do, a disrespectful thing to the readers? My story was never big by any means, it peaked at 274 followers. My fiction is way too huge in term of volume and I think I can chop the entire thing down, but deep down, it feels wrong. Wrong because the story didn't finish since I declared it dropped so it never got a resolution but on the other hand I can rework the entire story so its better and has a definite end. Am I better off just cannbilzaing portions of it in a new frankisten draft?
>>
>>23928496
It's fine, it's just a bit on the short side.
In english, I think, anything below 1000-1500 is a very short chapter
From 2000 to 5000 is around "standard" length
If you go over 8000 the chapter might be considered very long
>>
>tfw I will never be as good as J.R.R Tolkien
>>
On a scale from 10 to 20 how hoyped are you for mover writing month but not nanowrimo because fuck those guys although if Trump gets reelected I’m going to kill myself because that’s better than rotting in one of his trans concentration camps.
>>
>>23928884
>if Trump gets reelected
When*
>>
>>23923525
>how should I do it?
For me, I just write. I write and write for days. I manage to tease out quite a lot, even though not usually what I had intended to tease up.

So it fails, so it sucks? Chock in the drawer and you can revisit later or scavenge it for spare parts. I'm a scurrilous scavenger of failed projects of all sorts. That rotting husks of failure might be a feasty fuel for future failures, which can then be carried forth for further future failures, forever.
>>
>>23927294
If it feels right and fits, who cares, imo. Lots of great authors hammer chapters into whatever shape fits. If it feels right, its right.
>>
>>23923569
your too smart for this board nigga get your ass on to SA
>>
>>23928735
I rewrote my story and published it as novels at Amazon, but I didn't remove the original fiction, because that's a complete dick cunt move, and fuck all the jews who do that. Also, 274 followers is fucking great and you're a pussyass bith for dropping it
>>
tomorrow I will start writing again, my video game and book reading break is now over
>>
>>23928981
>but I didn't remove the original fiction, because that's a complete dick cunt move
Why? Honest question. Any "fans" already read it, and you hardly owe theoretical new readers anything ...?
>>
I need a fresh perspective
>On top of a mountain, there's a city. In this city, there's a place in which the child the heroes are escorting will either ascend to apotheosis (killing everyone) or remove her godly power (saving everyone). Waiting it out isn't an option. Killing the girl would work but the heroes are morally against it.
>In this story, gods are addictions, the more you follow them the less you're able to control yourself, so, by default, the girl wants to reach apotheosis, the only reason she hasn't done so is because she needs to physically go there
What reasons do the heroes have to believe the girl will make the right choice, once she's there?
>>
>>23929005
>Any "fans" already read it, and you hardly owe theoretical new readers anything ...?
What twisted backwards logic is this? You don't want any new readers or fans after some arbitrary amount of time has passed? Stories exist to be read. And if you want to think in such terms, you "owe" EVERYTHING to the readers who gave your work a chance. Respecting your readers new and old is the least you can do to repay them. Just because it looks like you can make some money thanks to their support doesn't mean you're now king who can give the finger to the world.
>>
>>23929019
But the current followers have already read the story...? Less than 1% will reread it, if that. So taking it down doesn't affect them.
>Stories exist to be read
Yeah which is why taking the story down from free sites so you can upload it through major exclusive channels like KU is the reasonable next step. You put the story out to more readers. And since we're talking about a web serial here, KU is the biggest place to get readers
>respecting the reader
But why is taking the story down 'disrespecting the reader'??? They've already read it! I just fundamentally don't understand your perspective
>>
I haven't written or read for over a year and need to get back into it before I explode. I also realize I'm just chronically sad concerning long-over things. What modern day authors obviously channeled a deep sadness through their work? Does that kind of thing help siphon out the puss of it all?
>>
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>Moved back to big city recently
>So fucking loud all the time I can't read properly, let alone write
>Train, Plane, bus, truck, car, music, neighbors, sirens, roommates
>At all hours there's something going on, all the time nonstop
Holy fucking shit how can anyone live like this? What the fuck
>>
>>23928355
Could go the other way and have the MC dig into her about it. Maybe I would go for something where that would lead to him questioning her confidence, leading into some heated argument, which leads to sex.
>>23928496
If it helps, my intro chapter is 2100 words.
>>23929111
Maybe John Banville?
>>
Winning awards is a fail state.
Getting an adaptation is a fail state.
Having readers is a fail state.

The only way to win is to write something truly impenetrable, something that no one but the author is capable of appreciating.
>>
>>23929056
You neglected to answer why "X number of people have read the story, so I will force everyone else to pay for it now" is all fair in your head and not disgustingly greedy kikery.
>>
>>23929183
Wrong, the real win is to have your work censored, that's how you know you really have hit a nerve into someone powerful.
>>
>>23927629
I just did a quick reread with a new font and found a bunch of issues. Cut around 100 words which I think was great. Anything that sounded unsure of itself, I just cut. Figured the last thing to be a competition is have under confident writing. Anyway, I think it's truly set now. Gonna drink some whiskey, goon to hentai, and then pigeon mail it right to Lundun.
>>
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Been trying my hand at fantasy and realized that I really suck at it
>>
>>23928884
He didn't do that the last time he was President, and he's not going to after his re-election. You're listening to the deranged ramblings of a dying establishment that can't deal with their loss of relevance and control over the flow of information.
>>
>>23929161
Why the hell did you move to the poor part of a big city? I live in a big city (can't even claim suburban...my house is definitely urban) but it's quiet here most of the time, especially at night.
>>
>>23929604
>>23929604
>>23929604
>>
>>23927361
did you publish that 400k story on RR or is it sitting on a drive?
>>
>>23925328
I don't have an issue with your work having a stance but rather the way in which it goes about doing so as per your own words.
By providing indulgence to the priests by portraying them as exhaustively incompetent and stripping the children of any tangible reason by framing their conflict as childishness manifest you've effectively written a vacuous novel. There's plenty of legitimate historical reasons that one could use as a pretext for the children's actions but instead you've provided me and your readers with the simplest reasoning: that they're children. Conversely the priests' role as incompetent peons by literary necessity almost renders them as collective characters with how one-dimensional it makes them sound.
>Nobody wins in this story
The prefects pretty much follow the archetype of the tragic hero by being unjustly punished for their beliefs and get to espouse a third position that is neither incompetent nor self-destructive for the audience to see therefore making them the de facto heroes. Their failures are borne of circumstance and are not their fault thus their ideals or character are not repudiated by the work. You yourself align with them and they follow the beliefs you've presented.
My point wasn't that I objected to you writing a tragedy. You don't have to write a meandering exploration either. By not portraying all sides with an equal amount of care and depth you're edifying a hollow house and the choice to use an historical setting is nearly wasted. You are not borrowing from history in order to shine a light on it nor do you make use of it for wider symbolism. I did not in fact tell you to write about the French Revolution, I alluded to the fact that borrowing from it only supports your work and choice of setting, and that other such points in history being referenced only go towards establishing the ideas that you've presented to me since otherwise they'd most likely go over everyone's head.
You basically have the outline for the story (what happens) but in order to successfully write what you pitched, as in «commentary to the spiritual and political situation of the last century onwards», there's still a lot of background work that needs to be done. The substance of your replies don't hint at having done said work or even having an idea that any such work could exist. I don't mean this to discourage you but rather to tell you that you should think much more broadly and deeply at what you're trying to write and how it should be. I cannot magically imbibe you with the awareness of an higher ceiling of literary craftsmanship but I believe that I've sufficiently pointed out where your outline is weakest. If you fleshed out the characters into their own persons, made use of the history and found some ways to insert meaning throughout your story you would be on a decent track to achieving your goal.
>>
>>23929962
Alright, I'll bear it in mind.
>>
wow, look at this pile of crap: https://files.catbox.moe/d9sukc.zip
and these bundles of joy: https://files.catbox.moe/aw9gz2.pdf https://files.catbox.moe/rpuvnd.pdf



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