>>24738254
I want a qt german gf so bad

>>24738254
if you eat meat you are most likely an evil person.

The real way of reading the newspapers is to read nothing but the posters and head-lines. If we read nothing but these, we can keep, like a perpetual childhood, the belief that wonderful things are really happening on every side of us. If we are unwise enough to read the journalistic text itself, we discover that nothing has happened at all.

>>24738274
I use yt-dlp

>>24738273
You can always join the military and fight some useless war

>>24738281
For what reason?

>>24738285
Dopamine rushes

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I wonder if I was molested as a young boy and don't remember it anymore. I think that kind of thing would stick in my memory, but it must have been when I was very young because I acted and felt strangely even in my earliest memories. People say low self-esteem, early sexual development, unexplained feelings of guilt, and strange sexual fixations are possible signs of childhood sexual abuse, and that describes my childhood to a T.
I have strange memories too. There was a red metal box in my dad's closet when I was about 5 and I distinctly remember him telling me its purpose was "to prevent the penis from entering the vagina." I remember finding old home videos I and my younger sister took as kids, after finding our parents' digital camera, and feeling uncomfortable at the way we both threw around strikingly explicit sexual terms despite our ages as we filmed ourselves doing somersaults or playing with legos or whatever. For a long time I found empty bedrooms in houses, right when you first move in or right before you move out, strangely unsettling. I moved quite a lot as a kid, usually every 2-4 years. I remember feeling extremely guilty and having very low self-esteem even as a 6 or 7 year old. I remember discovering masturbation and progressing to putting things in my ass all within a couple months, like it was natural. Later in life, I remember feeling strangely anxious around other boys in locker rooms or camping or whatever, and working myself into quite a frenzy trying to make gay thoughts go away. I also remember seeing trap and shota hentai on booru sites as a teen and instead of passing over it without caring I would think something like "oh gross I'm totally not into that" and feel the strange anxiety again. These days I don't worry about it any more - maybe I'm bi or something - and I'm more aware of the true nature of the anxiety from my teenage years.
Did something happen in my early childhood that warped my sexuality as I grew up? Is there a single, clean explanation for the way I ended up, something as simple as "anon was molested when he was 4" that neatly wraps it all up in a way that explains everything that came after? It would be convenient, in some ways, if that were true. I'll probably never know.

>>24738298
Did you not get the hint when everyone ignored you the first time that you posted this wall of text?

>>24738304
This is my first post on the matter. Are you confusing me with someone else?

>>24738308
So you're telling me that >>24737952 wasn't you? Sure.

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Was on /fa/ and heard about "trad-ivy." And then changed my aesthetic. . . and like. . . was like. . . "Is this effay?"
And then I was up in the bedroom at this house-party, just chillin'--readin'--The "Baghadvad Gita." And my, oh my! I had an empowered SJW girl on top of me, I put the book aside, looked her in the eyes (*Eyes are up here!!!* *I know, I know!*),
and then I declared
"I am become Epstein."

>>24738317
No, it wasn't. Try actually reading posts sometime instead of skimming them.

>>24738323
Both of you are blogposting faggots.

>>24738327
I wrote my thoughts out, just as the thread intended me to do. If this offends you so much, you could always just hide my post.

>>24738254
I really thought I was way over the slump of having an existential crisis, that I was too mature and firm in my faith. Things have been very difficult this year. I think I may be stretching my mind too far in all directions, and that it might break apart resulting in either psychosis or death. All I have left is a very strong longing for kindness in the afterlife, even though I am, on all accounts, undeserving of such a gift. I'm too old for this shit.

>>24738327
>thread called write your thoughts
>complains about people writing a lot
You can't be serious.

I had a dream that I was a serial killer, only I wasn't a serial killer. It was actually a living lifelike doll that looked like me who went out and killed people. I discovered it in an abandoned basement inside of a broken closet, it saw me and started to chase after me.

>>24738363
It knows how to find you in your sleep now

I miss you.

Can I put some moldy bread from my fridge on the gash on my leg? I think that's penicillin or something.

>>24738378
Well, I did manage to fight it off, but not kill it. If it comes back again I hope to be better prepared for it.

I think I've realized that my 'protagonist' is probably better off as an ancestor/father to my real protag.

If I were on top of every thread in the catalogue and had read every post therein, every day of the week, I would have no time for anything else.

Think I've made a girl fall in love with me.

im scared

>>24738603
me too

I wish you still cared the way that you did in the beginning.

>>24738285
War is the ultimate game because war is at last a forcing of the unity of existence. War is god.

>>24738603
me three

>>24738518
Fuckin hate it when that happens
t. hero has better chemistry with a female side character I'm killing off than with the woman he ends up with

Every day is another mindless droll, I will never "get a job" or "have a normal one" or "touch grass".
I will continue to play video games and shitpost on the internet and if anime girls don't become real or I don't get a girlfriend I will just simply KILL MYSELF.

>>24738603
Of what?

>>24738661
I'm in my improooooovement era.

>>24738696
Niggers

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>>24738254
every few months, i browse the /soc/ archive for potential friends to chat about books, films, anime, et cetra, yet have only ever been discouraged. at this point, i think i wouldn't have the constitution to add someone (or post my own handle) if they seemed in my same way. no matter !

We could fix things.

>>24738649
well maybe you shouldn't have married another dude and a lame one at that

>>24738786
What?

I love you and I miss you. I really want you to call me back.

I did a weed edible today and the aftereffect is, I'm tired as fuck.

>>24738801
ya those will make u groggy but i kinda like it cuz it kills off the cringe anxiety i normal suffer with

do u think it's possible to be a closeted straight guy and chill with a gay social network? i don't mind letting a dude suck it, but i'm not doing any butt stuff, i just get stand heternormative normies especially women with the teehee i love to travel bullshit

>>24738800
If this person isn't answering your calls they probably don't what to talk to you.

>>24738800
are u the one who texted me and said u were gonna be in the city? ya u weren't in my contacts list, and i don't know if ur some cringe wacko from the past, so i deleted it unread.

>>24738800
I wish this was for me :(

>>24738828
>Anon just wants brunch
Yeah, I think the faggots will accept you once you don't rub your love of pussy in their face though a lot of the ones that will suck you for being straight won't mind or would like if you rub it in their face
You may still be exposed to travel bullshit however

>>24738869
ok so where should i go to meet some gay dudes? club, bar, somewhere else? no apps

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>>24738821
I'm currently drinking a burnt tasting coffee from Tim Hortons, tastes like shit but I think I might be able to read now, if I don't puke.