Howdy, partner!What you see here began as a series of comedy-centric stories with the concept of an alicorn-ascended Princess Applejack trying to change a mismanaged Equestria for the better by humorously interacting with the other, quite lazy, princesses. Plus late night pink antics.Not to mention a whole bunch of Changelings with nothing better to do but cause mischief.The whole thing was set in motion by this gem:~~~~~>So, wait, why am Ah' a princess again?>Because you seem to be the only goddamn one of those ponies who gets that a Princess need to do actual work regarding maintenance of the kingdom. You know how much city planning or trade negotiations Twilight or Luna have done? Fucking nothing. Everyone is obsessed with the world ending threats they think I should fight, but the minute I point out the free health care I have to work to maintain everyone goes quiet. And don't even get me started on Cadence, who can't even manage a basic meeting with the Equestrian Games representative. Fucking annoying. Go do actual princess stuff, because apparently everyone else got the pamphlets mixed up or something and thinks "Princess" means "Beat cop."~~~~~Are you feeling creative? Try your hand at writing a story! No contribution is too small and we love having new folks around.If you're more artistically inclined give a drawing or sketch a shot. Don't fret too much; it doesn't have to be fancy and we appreciate artwork a lot.If that isn't your style either, writers always need feedback. So tell us what you liked - and what you didn't - to help us improve.If you are unsure about anything, do not be afraid to ask. We will gladly bring you up-to-date or explain anything you feel is unclear.Thread 373! THE FINAL BATTLE IS HERE! APPLEJACK AND CELESTIA, FINISH THIS!
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366 desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/40495045367 desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/40623606368 desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/40730260369 desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/40805318370 desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/40885602371 desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/40989935372 desuarchive.org/mlp/thread/41062407Here is full archive of the stories in condensed, easy-to-read form with all chatter in-between removed.Check out the pastebin here:http://pastebin.com/u/PrincessApplejackCurious what happened last time?Check out the previous thread here: >>41062407You are completely new and have no idea what is going on? There is a wikia with an overview of all characters, a complete timeline, previous thread recaps and stuff used in these stories!Check it out here:http://princess-aj.wikia.com/wiki/Princess_Applejack_WikiConfused about when a character first showed up? Want to know when an arc started? Check out character notes and details here :https://docs.google.com/spreadsheets/d/1PsMAwLcIdC3IYxezAV9Ko4neEguNvc3eQqQqiTCxdDs/edit#gid=2119378650Check out the 'Princess Applejack: Re-Cut Edition' here:https://docs.google.com/document/d/15cv3kqExr_vOM0JkUh4dqnvVKxJ5Z-P1KHwE8Z7aG0k/edit?usp=sharingAre you interested in the dark side of these threads?Check out our collection of NSFW stories here:http://pastebin.com/u/NSFT_NotSafeForTwo_And above all else, enjoy your stay at /paj/
>>41150451FIRST FOR ITS MAGICSHE AINT GOTTA EXPLAIN SHIT
>Applejack"Celestia"~~>Tia? Ah've gotta question."I have a great many myself, for that matter! I'm simply at a loss for words considering everything that's transpired! If I have any ability t aide you, I will.">What makes a good ruler?"That is a question I've struggled with myself. Sometimes I awaken in the night, wondering what flaws may have escaped my gaze. Sometimes I witness others committing flaws I deem proof of their failure, only to realize I've sinned much the same myself without ever knowing. I wonder some days as I gaze upon the world if a measure of a ruler is their policy, how much favor they hold with those beneath them, or perhaps even if it is mere advancement and survival that truly prove they are the greatest. For how can a ruler truly be deemed a failure, should their subjects succeed and survive? Yet, if they fail to bring happiness, could they even be called such at all? Or are they merely a tyrant with a soft hoof ready to strike. Many a nights, I wonder. Even now still, I wonder. Did I show too much favoritism to my allies? Was I too harsh upon my enemies? Did I fail too many times, and merely succeeded to prevent my deposing? I wish I had the answer for you, truly. But alas, I can only hope that it is bravery, wisdom, and love. For that is as most, I can give.">Huh. Ah' thought it was makin' sure the numbers were the correct distance apart on the stick."On the wh-oh.">Heh."Really now, of all times?">Pinkie said there was always time for a joke."I suppose you're right. I suppose you're right.">Tia? One more thing."Another question?">Just a reminder."About what?">Ah' think you know."Hm. I suppose I do.">Iffin' Ah'm gonna fight with someone, Ah'm glad it's the greatest Ruler who ever did sit her massive flanks on the throne."And I suppose if I must battle as well, it's with the one who always believed I would have the answers. Are you ready?">Darn right. YEEHAW!
>>41150451Knowing how long this was coming, its shocking it’s finally here
>>41150451“I have two ponies”“Because I am the mom”
>>41150489>Aj making dad jokesWHAT DOES IT MEAN
>>41150530She’s a dad obviously. Mother of all is right there
Pinkie Preview Prophecies>Applejack unleashes her ultimate technique...er-no it's not apple themed...>Sorry, Pinkie was meta-gaming a little. >Trixie's a firework. >DT knows spells too...EXPLOSION! >Harry isn't sure if he should choose the mare. >Spike gathers his dragon balls. >The Crusaders get into a series of fortunate events. >Final Countdown fanservice!
>>41150489Awww
OOCO>AJ"???"~~~With a sigh, the former earth pony looked across the battlefield, her mind wandering through thoughts of the past - from her life before she met that studious purple mare from Canterlot, up through her time as a Princess of Equestria.Years had gone by since the earth pony was made a Princess, stretching to what felt like a decade despite being just over a quarter of that.And yet, as the end of all she knew drew near, it felt like she'd only just gotten started.>Too soon... It's just... Too dang soon to end it all."Yer tellin' me!">GAH!With a jolt, the alicorn looks to her side."We didn't even get to do nothin'!"And sees a familiar filly standing there, glowing with that rainbow power.>Applebloom?!"That's my name."The older mare stared at her, eyes wide.>Wha...Unable to process her own emotions.>Ah...Between joy at being able to see her sister for what may be the last time. >How...To fear over the very same."...RAINBOW DAAAASSHH!"~How did you knooooooww!?~So, she settled on anger.~~~~~I didn't expect AJ (and Celestia) to be yoinked out at the end of the debate. And I think it's a shame that the CMC being brought in is still ambiguous-ish. Which brings us to this post. I'm planning to do a followup, a short reunion and "goodbye" of sorts before AJ disappears, which should be posted by tomorrow. If someone wanted to do their own for the Apple sisters (and Big Mac and Granny Smith, who I don't know if I'll bring in as well), that's fine and part of why I'm giving this heads up. Otherwise, I should have mine done and posted by tomorrow. Nothing long, maybe just one or two posts. I just thought it'd be a shame to pass up on this interaction, no matter how brief. Plus, I already had this post written out days ago, so...
>>41151108I can dig that
>Twilight"Dash"'Pinkie'~Rarity~(Fluttershy)~~~~~~>Huh."Is that... good? Bad? They're not like, being summoned so those jerks can take revenge, right?">Do they have something revenge worthy that doesn't count for us?'Maybe they just grabbed Celly an it kind of hit her too?'~Surely if this were, say, a call, we'd be involved, right?~(It would be fairly weird to pick just those two...)"...Raise your hoof if you thought it would be Twilight for the summon for battle thing."Almost everyone raises their hoof.>...Yeah.Everyone raises their hoof.>It does usually end up being me."Soooo, good? Bad?"'Can it get more bad, Dashie? I feel like the biggun bashing is the bashiest we're gonna blast, Dash.'(I don't think it's any worse, just more personal if it's bad..)~Which would be worse to us!~>...Think they're just saving me for the end of the gauntlet, or-"HEY! WHOEVER'S UP THERE! MAKE ME SECOND TO LAST!">Why would that help?"My defeat would be the most dramatic."'Oooooh she's right.'~Can I please do it instead, then? I need the chance to flex my drama.~"No."~Well! There goes me giving you my alicorn magic as a last resort!~"SHOOT!"(I feel like we're coping very oddly with this.)>It should've been me!Silence>I had to get it out.
>Luna"Delight"'56'~~~~~>...huh.Blinking, the princess of the night raised her hoof, and waved in the now void space where her dear sister had been second ago."What was that?! It's like the universe exploded, then sucked her in! Was that them!? Did those guys just, kill her out of spite!? Why her, of all of us!? Why!? Oh fuck are they going to blast us one by one!? Make us squirm!? Make us wonder who's next as they pick us off giving us the false hope we've been spared, then blam! And there's no guarding from that, what am I supposed to do!? Hide under a star!? Why would they do that!?">Tis not... them... we do not believe.The stallion paused in his panic, finally able to calm himself enough to hear the almost soft sound humming in her chest."It's... not?">No. This was... familiar."How familiar?">Very familyer..."...wait, wait wait wait, are you saying..."She wasn't. But, at the same time, she very much was."Oh. Oh! That's a good thing! That's a great thing, even, I think! It means we've got a chance, someone's coming up to... to..."He realized something."Hey, why didn't youuuu...."Too late."I mean I'm sure there's a reason. Totally unrelated to faaaayyyhhh-"'Shhhhh, shhh shh.'The stallion hadn't even seen the short changeling before the hoof had come up to cut off his words.'I got this. Moons? You need a snuggle!'>...we do.She didn't seem sad, on the outside.'There there, we just need you here, you were the best at it here after all! You saved us before, you might gotta do it again!'On the inside, she knew how Applejack felt.
>>41151506Parents say they don’t have a favorite.They do.
>Sunset"Glimmer'~~~>..."We shouldn't be worried about that, right?">I FUCKING KNEW I SHOULD'VE SHOT HER!"Before she?">Obviously she just got poofed to the high place!"So where would she have gone if you shot her?">...damn it there was no winning.
>>41151677She’s got a point, where’s she gonna go, Detroit?
>>41151677NC>Faust"???"~~~~>I summon forth the Avatar of Truth-POOF>..."Yeah Sunset got bored and shot me in the head. Just did not hesitate, right between the eyes.">.."What'cha doin' there, some kinda light show?">...well this is far less impressive.
>Fizzle"Flash"~>I choose to accept this as our victory."How so?">They ran away, we won."I... think they got summoned by the cosmos-">Ran away."Called by the force of-">Fled like babies."Like an actual god just-'>WINNING.
>>41151939What's even funnier is she's like, tiny in this.
>>41150451Her mane being space dust is inspired.
>>41151441>LEMME AT LEAST BE PART TWO WHY"S IT GOTTA BE TIA
>>41151506>familyerCertified Pinkie Pun
>>41152992She can appreciate it.
>>41152677can’t even be Luigi.
>>41152077Hey if they can cry out in denial…
>Spike“Dt”~~~~>… GO GETTUM!“I could’ve done it.”>Cheer with me damn it!
NC>Salt“Chitania”~~~~>Blast! I knew there was trickery afoot! Now we must battle with all our might so we may have a shred of hope of victory!“It’s fine.”>… it is?“Yeah, we were pretty sure we could beat her; right?”>That was what I told myself to feel better.“So like… each has half that power, right?”>… huh.“Yeah this should be fine. Chitania! PAWNCH
>>41154302Don’t punch light you idiot! Why do you think that would work!?
>>41154558Well how’s she gonna punch truth?
>>41154786Truth has a body, that’s why they keep telling you to face the truth.I like imagining a clown personally but whatever works for you
>>41154302NC>AJ"Faust"~~>So ya' realize we have no context here, ya' just summoned us with no context. We don't know what ya' talked about or what's going on."SHUT UP AND PUNCH!">... Ah' mean Ah'm gonna but not cause ya' said so.
>>41155008>Celestia~>Don't see her for eaons and the first thing she says is assault someone and don't ask questions>I didn't know Equestria used to be called Detrot.
OOCO CD>Applejack"Applebloom"~~~High above the battlefield came a song of freedom.~WOOOOOO!~A shout of joy from a filly unbound by the circumstances of her birth, now given the chance to carve a path through the sky as she was no longer forced to hide.>Well, Ah'm sure glad someone's happy about this...While far below her, on the field of once battle, stood a pair of sisters who were left feeling quite cold in comparison."What's the big deal?">The big... The big deal is yer on a battlefield!Though "heated" might be a better word."Seems more field than battle, if ya ask me.">Ah didn't!As the eldest sister could hardly contain the fire of frustration raging within her."Nobody's even fightin' anymore!"A fire that spread to her younger sibling."And y'all know Ah've been through worse!">That ain't the point!"Then what is?!"The elder sister flinched.>It's...Her teeth clenched and brows narrowed as she stared her sibling down.>It's...Until...>...It just ain't right...She could hold her gaze no longer, her focus drifting to the earth at her feet as her shoulders slumped.>It ain't right that ya gotta know what's goin on, that ya gotta see me lookin' sorry like this, just waitin' for the end of everything we know and love... Ya should be back at the farm with Granny Smith and Big Mac, or foolin' around with yer friends. Happy. Unaware. Not here... where ya gotta know how bad things are.And so her sibling's anger cooled as well."...Well, it ain't the sorriest Ah've seen ya look."At that, her sister's gaze went flat. >Is that supposed to make me feel better?"Just sayin'. Ah remember that time ya nearly destroyed an outhouse 'cause ya-">APPLEBLOOM!The filly laughed and Applejack felt her cheeks burn a little hotter. But the elder mare soon managed to crack the slightest of smiles."Ah'm just sayin'. Ya don't look as bad as then.">Ah'll take yer word for it, but... bathroom troubles are a bit easier to come back from than the end of the world."Does that mean we can still come back from it?"There was no response from the elder mare, only a deep breath and a sigh.1/2
>>41155240"So... it really could be the end?">Could be..."...It really does feel like it's too soon. You've been gone for so long and now that you're back, Ah... "Her lips curled, tightly wound in a grimace."Ah barely get the chance to talk to ya.">Oh, sugarcube...Foreleg outstretched, the elder sibling moved to embrace her sister in a hug, which the filly returned in earnest"Ah know yer sore about me bein' here, but if this is how things are really gonna end, Ah'm glad Ah get to spend it with you."The mare hugged her tighter, rocking the filly lightly in her grip, unable to find the strength to speak.>It ain't right...High above the battlefield, beyond the bounds of reality, the fate of existence was being decided.>It ain't right...And there was nothing she could do except comfort this small part of her world.>It just isn't...She wanted to take to the skies, to pass through the veil and stars and clouds, to stand before the so-called gods who dared to threaten all she held dear and just...+ Fight? +>...!A voice echoed in her mind.+ For your world? For your friends? For your family? +No. It wasn't quite a voice. It wasn't a collection of words. It was a sensation. A familiar one, at that.+ Will you fight for them? +The mare couldn't speak, couldn't vocalize a single word within the moment of a moment the otherworldly sensation had taken hold of her.>Always.But her heart could.+ Then ready yourself... +She leaned in, placing a kiss on the forehead of her younger sister.>Love ya, sugarcube...Before releasing her hug.+ Take hold... +As her body began to glow with a surge of colors.+ And fight... +In a blink, she was pulled toward the sky, her form like that of a bolt as lightning as she shot through the tear in reality.+ Fight, dear Champion...To the cosmos beyond.+ Fight as only you can. +To the throne of Heaven.~~~~~BONUS~~~~~>Applebloom"Scootaloo"~~~>Applejack! APPLEJAAAACK! MAH SISTER'S BEEN GODNAPPED!"WOOOOOO!">THAT AIN'T A GOOD THING!"BOOOOO!">Unless it's our god? All that magic she was glowin' with felt kinda familiar and nice. Sorta like that angel we met. Which means she could be fighting for us?"WOOOOOO!"
>>41155245I will never get over that the CMC met an actual angel character looooong ago to set this up
>>41155245I do like the idea she at least, like, asked
>>41155245>>41155268Can’t Sweetie call that guy?
>>41155245>>41155287It does seem more like her to at least doublecheck she was willing to go for it and not tired of this bullshit
>>41155245>Gets her back>GoneThe irony
>>41155555Nice dubs
>>41155555>quint 5svery nice
>>41155555PP-Anon here.I had to stop what I'm doing and come back, just so I can say nice Quint. Consider them checked.
>>41155555Neat
>>41155665so he has been summoned.
>>41156012So he shall come
>>41155555Nice
>>41155245>Twilight~~~~>Can I come too?…>No yeah that’s fair
>13"Spike"~~~~>Mom damn it."OHHHHH!"He starts dancing in front of her, holding an L to his forehead"Ain't ovvvver, it ain't oooooooverrrrr!">You know they could still lose!"Buddy my maybe mom and ex girlfriend are up there, you bout to get STOMPED!">...your what."Which one confused you?">I guess, either of them?"Well you got plenty of time to ponder it when we WIN!">Uggghghh."WHOP WHOP!">I know you're just trying to provoke me to get me smote or something."Not so fun when it's your side, is it!?">...no..."ROWP ROWP! PONY STYLE!"
>>41156996She can still brainwash him.
>>41157204>One more word and you’re singing about being a little teapot.“Short and stout! Here is my handle, out your ass blow it out! When I get all steamed up here me shout! Fuck you!”>… damn
>>41156763>Twilight"Rainbow Dash"~~~>I don't want to alarm you all but I, personally, am not going to be the one to save the universe this time. I know this makes you all feel very uneasy, but I believe we can still maybe eek out a victory!"...">What?"Your track record solo fighting kind of sucks, actually.">IT DOES NOT!"How well did going solo work against Nightmare Moon, or Discord?">...Okay so I'm more of a gather a team and point a magic crown kind of leader.
>>41157860If it works!
>>41158018if it ain’t broke, don’t fix it.
>>41158271or if it is broke, fix it.
>>41157860>Pinkie“Rarity”~~~>She knows we’re gong to do a combo at some point, right?“You’d think she learned after all this time..”
>>41158827There’s for sure a harmony beam in the future
>>41157860>Twilight“Harmony”~~~>Harmony! Can I have my crown back real quick?“It’s a part of my body.”>Just real quick I said! Not long!“It’s the only thing keeping me standing.”>Real quick I said!
>>41159273>Lemme borrow your spleen!
>>41158827Does that mean Sunsets gonna give a team assist too?
>>41159619>CHEER OFF LETS GO>I WENT TO HIGHSCHOOL BITCH
>>41159273Iis it even still there? I thought it was in the box
>>41160182The box was unlocked by keys, the elements were still in the tree
>>41160414One of them was feeling vibes too
>>41160716I mean friendship is literally their power.
>>41159273>Pommel"Harmony"~~>So, uh... what's happening with them?"Hm? Why are you asking me?">Can't you... see it?"Heaven!?">Is that where they went?"I don't know! I can't see space!">Oh... figured that was like, a part of you."I was a tree! I couldn't even talk! VINES kicked my ass!">Sorry, you're right."It's okay. Instant win button skews perceptions.">It sure does..."...">...if you did die, would you go to-"I better or I'm gonna be tiiiiiiccckkkkedd"
>>41161190>Harmony"Chrysalis"~~~>..."...I'm sorry my power stabbed you?">Oh, thanks!"...">..."Fiiiine you can call me friend.">Hooray!
>Cadence"Luna"~~~~>Should I be cheering for her to beat up my husband, or..."Have no worry, thou should know our sister hath nothing but love for thine beau. She would fight to the end to see him safe.">Oh, good."...well, then again, if the universe is at stake...">LUNA!"It would be a nice reason to get a cake at least-">OH MY GOD!
>>41161789She needs no reason for cake!
>>41161789NC>Faust"Celestia"~~~>Go, now, and fight to save your world! Go and-"Can I make cake.">...what?"CAN. I. MAKE. CAKE. WITH. MAGIC.">...Yes?DING!>Daughter no.DINGIDINGINDINGING>Please."This really is heaven! YAYYYYY!"She cried as she drowned in cake.>I'm sorry, she's not normally like this.Neither of her foes believed her.
>>41162205>Salt"Celestia"~~~>Can I have some?"NO!">So... this is hell...
>>41161789Quick! Your sun god requires offerings!
>>41162569Bake her a CHILD
>>41162873Those taste terrible so many tiny bones.
>>41163119That’s why you boil them!
>>41162873>Celestia“Aztec pony”~~~~>… why did you think I wanted this?“I just don’t understand gods anymore!”
>>41163573In fairness he tried it the other way
>>41163573“I’m going back to gluing magogo!”
>>41162873>Pinkie"Time Turner"~~~>What are you doing!?"Giving out an offering to God Empress Applejack!">WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU!?... she already has apples, you dope!"Ohhhh yeah that makes sense.">Some ponies! Now, where's a child sacrifice...
>>41164410>Scootaloo~~~~~~>NOT IT!...>Yeah I knew it would be me...
>>41164800>Pip"Luna"'Pinkie'~~>Oui, whos puttin' me on this here slab?"NO! He's the only one who really likes us and is a pony!"'Awwww.'
>>41165179> and is a pony!"Racist
>>41165359Not even God can judge her now.
>>41165569or she won’t do it too harshly.
>>41165830Nepotism at its finest
>>41166100Hey she earned it, she got blasted a lot
>>41165569>Luna~~~~>Just because our sister rules the universe now doesn’t mean we aren’t still humble!…>The gold throne is a coincidence
>>41166492You think she’d want blue
>>41166492>Spike"Twilight"~>I call high priest.'Of?">First church of Applejack."You can't do that.">Oh?"Yeah, Celestia will get miffed.">You're obviously high priestess of Celestia."But I can't be high priest.">Well, Shining can be High Priest of Celestia."...shoot he does fit that, doesn't he? Alright, you can go for Applejack, we'll be high priest and priestess.">Just don't look up what happened to the last four sets of high priests and priestesses."Why? What happened with-EW EW EW EWWWWWWWW!">I thought their kids were cute.
>>41167021She's into it.
>>41167319He’s about to do the same.
>>41167696Not if she has anything to say about it.
>>41167021>Dash"Rarity"~~>You think I should go with worshipping Celestia or AJ?"Neither, darling! They are our friends, and surely-">Because AJ gives blessings of strength, but Celestia gives blessing of popularity."R...really?">No, I just wanted to confirm you're a coward."...I am..."
>>41168234>Ember"Delight"~>Did... did that pony just become a god?"Maybe? I only see what you see. I don't know why you think I have more insight on this.">...does that mean god is a pony?"I think she always was.">...so."...">About the RACISM."Please not now."
>>41168502Surely there’s a dragon god
>>41168794NC>Faust"???"~>Go gettum, girls!... you want in on this?Thus rumbled the edges of heaven itself, coiled by its rims which twisted and heaved as it's living scales were revealed beneath the heavenly clouds. The Great Serpent Dragon, the very edge of heaven itself, rose his mighty bearded head to gaze upon the twin invaders in the realm he holds together, looking upon them with an eye full of cunning, and power. With but a look, he could shake the heavens."...nahhhh."With but a shrug, he knocked all present off their hooves.>Why!?"That one apparently lays good pipe with a dragon. Thanks for including us in the magic thing, unlike SOMEONE."Faust's eyes grew shifty as the great head ducked back down.>...I gave like, two of them the fire thing-"Shut up.">Fiiiiine.
NC>Delight"Sunset"~~~>Well, well, well-"Oh shut up! My side can still win this.">Wanna bet?"Fine. But you'd better shower first, if you actually win.">Why?"'Cause I'm not putting a dirty dick in me.">What?!"Did I stutter? I have standards.">Are you implying I want to have sex with you?!"Does a bear shit in the woods?"~GRRUUGH~"The bear says yes."~GRUU~"He says yes!">Well, I don't! "You don't shit in the woods?">We're not doing that bit. And I don't want to have sex with you!"You don't?">No!"...">...I mean, not as a bet-"There it is.">I'm just being honest. But my bet has nothing to do with sex."Oh... What is it?">I was just going to force you into a deep, chapter by chapter discussion on the philosophical and social intricacies of Kite Turbo's brilliant masterpiece: Breach."That's it?">Uh... yeah?"Alright.">I figured you'd be a bit more exasperated having to contend with such heavy reading material."Getting to spend a bunch of time reading and talking about comics for children isn't the worst thing I could be doing.">THEY'RE NOT-"Save it. Flash couldn't convince me and you won't either. Besides, I'll only have to do it if you win.">Grrr... So, what do you get if you win?"I was gonna have you eat my fun box out.">..."Emphasis on was! As a joke! Haha...">..."...Unless?"
>Sunset"13"~~~~>I cannot get over how much of a headache I would've avoided if I'd just shot that guy."You didn't know.">I knew something was up, I knew it was weird, but I wanted to study him! I wanted to pick his brain and figure him out! I wanted to know, damn it! But then he blinked and I just said "Oh, Chitty got him, silly me for thinking she would miss that!""You didn't know, I said.">When if I'd just been like "Oh you remember the world? Well don't worry, I'll help youZAP! ZAP ZAP! DOUBLETAP!" Problem solved! All o this is solved!"...It does sound easier.">Go back to making me feel better and saying it's not my fault!"PICK A LANE!"
>>41169624When in doubtTAP
>>41169834Double she said damn it!
>>41169977This is why zombies.
>>41169624Coulda shoulda woulda
>>41169624To be fair those from the main verse would still show up would they?
>>41170848No, AU2 would've broken the Tree first if Delight hadn't intervened.
>>41169624>Sunset"Delight"~~~>..."...Erm...">I wonder if it's too late..."To turn to the good side? Never too late!">..."Oh you meant kill me.">Future proofing if nothing else..."I'm going to stand next to Twilight now.
>>41171347>Twilight"Delight"~>You don't have to hide."I disagree, you goddamn magic super laser horse.">...fair.
>>41171569>Pinkie"Delight"~Twilight~~~~~~~>You know she can still see you, even under Twilight, right?"Maybe! But is she willing to go through her to get to me, is the question? I hope not!">...Twi? You okay?~His feathers tickle.~>She's okay.
>>41170848They would’ve arrived to a world with no tree, but theoretically Faust might’ve called them up anyway
>Fizzle"Sweet Note"~~~>FUCK! FUCK FUCK FUCK! Now they're both up there too!"...so?">What do you mean, so!?"So, what?">They're up there! Ready to fight!"Annnnd?">And that's bad you Mudbrain!"Why?">Because they can fight now!"But Chitty and that guy can beat Faust, ain't that right?">They thought so, but not when she had backup!"Why?">BECAUSE.. uh..."Just sayin' what does just two regular ponies, powerful though they may be to us folks, add to a god?">.."So the power's still coming from Faust, right?">..."So if they could beat her, with her full power, why exactly is splitting that power between them going to do?">...huh."Ya'll tweaking for no reason."
>>41172116COMMONSENSEPOWER
>>41172555It’s her best feature
>>41172693Like a mini AJ
>>41172116he’s worried she’s going to use common sense to tell him to bugger off.
>>41173179NC>AJ"Salt"~~~~>Have ya' considered drinking a nice tall glass of fuck off?"I HAD NOT CONSIDERED THAT!"END
>>41173179NC>AJ"Chitania"~>Chitty Ah' don't wanna be that gal-"Do NOT call me that!">But iffin' we fight, ain't it gonna break the universe?*SHATTER NOISES*>More than ya' done already did it, Ah' reckon."I break things a lot, it's never bothered me before. I'll just fix it!">Yer' real good at smashin' stuff, but are ya' actually able ta' fix anything?"...That guy said he'd help.">Do ya' even fuckin' know him?"I mean, this is the first time we've met, so kinda? Also this is the first time I knew about him. Sunset mentioned help coming along but-">Was needlessly vague about it, yeah, Ah' know. Think she picked up bad habits from Glimmer."Who?">You not knowin' her is a biiig problem considerin' all this."I haven't figured out divine sight yet, you're just talking jibberish to me.">Look, Ah'm sure he'd say he'll help, but iffin' it's actually broken, ain't he just gonna bail?"To where?">His universe."...Okay so like, I knew that, but now that I actually think about it-">The universe me and the other six got shoved off to!"You got shoved off to another universe!?">HOW DO YA' NOT KNOW ALL THIS!?"I dunno! I've been hanging out with the Kirin this whole time, until Pennydrop exploded them!">Hanging out with who?... PENNYDROP DID WHAT!?"See! Not so fun when it's your turn to be completely lost!">It don't sound fun at all!"None of this was fun for me! The only ones who found it fun were crazy assholes who like to see me suffer!"*Pointedly looks at Faust, who tries to deny it, only to be thwarted by the popcorn in her mouth.*>Yeah, that happens a lot. Alright so... start at the beginning here."No, YOU start at the beginning! Do you know this guy and know something I should?">Well he fucked ya' in that universe, if that helps."...How was I? Like, scale of one to ten">Ah' didn't ask."Him not bragging about it isn't a good sign.">Do ya' care?"Yes! I never have sex, so I'm worried I'm bad at it! Really bad!">Ya' can ask him ta' give ya' tips, he does it a lot."...how much a lot.">A. Lot."With just me?">...no."Nooooo! Momma said never to love a whore!"~HEY!~
>>41173665>Salt"AJ"~~>I am not a whore!... Whores get paid! I'm the one shoveling out bits to make THEM happen!"Then yer' a bad whore.">HEY!
>>41173925>I'm the one shoveling out bits to make THEM happen!So they're whores.
>>41173665NC>Chitania"Salt"~~>She's right, we know nothing about each other! Quick! Tell me something about you!"I watched everyone I know die horribly and it's kind of my fault.">...Finally, someone relatable!
>>41174446>Did you also have someone who engineered your downfall and want nothing more than revenge?"...I think we're gonna disagree on this part."
>>41174763>...seriously."She got that GAME">...yeah, I understand it. Stupid Sunset...
>>41175068Stupid sexy sunset?
>>41175216Nailed it wearing nothing now at all.
>>41171569I mean, he really doesn't have to hide since he's definitely strong enough to give Sunset a fight that'll be closer to her strength than she's probably willing to admit.
>>41175861Rainbow power indeed OP
>>41175861True but then he couldn’t hide under Twi
>>41175861>Sunset"Delight"~~~>..."Just to remind you, I am currently empowered by the very force of Harmony itself, I am literally an instant win button made manifest with super laser cloth.">...She moves forwards, he jumps back.>...smart."It's how I lasted this long!">..."No I did not forget you soloing two superpowered alicorn, one of which has dimensional powers.">Good, good...."...">...I hate that it would take three hits to kill you."Bet I could make it four!"
>>41176349Go for it!
>>41176138And Harmony is right there
>>41176734>Harmony"Sunset"~~~>Could you please stop threatening him? He seems nice! I admittedly don't have a lot of frame of reference, but I do sense a lot of friendship out of him, which is my main thing. Biiiig on friendship, I am."Or what, you'll step on me?">I was going to say sit on you."...">..."...I mean...">What?"THICC.">I am not nearly sociable enough to process this.
>>41176823Oh myyyyy
>>41176823>Delight"Harmony"~~>Hey, thanks for sticking up for me."No problem!">..."So are you going to tell me what that means or-">Absolutely positively not. As a friend, I insist you never learn what Thicc means."...I can read your mind, but I don't need to. You're staring hard.">I AM BUT A STALLION"I would feel odd, but even that dragon is too-oh, she's thinking about something different. Delight? When she says she wants to eat me...">...But a stallion...
>>41177237In fairness it wasn’t what he thought it was either
>>41177426She’s been fighting for a while she’s hungry!
>>41177237>Delight"Ember"'Harmony'~~~>EMBER NO!"It's cruel! CRUEL! Imagine a giant plate of... whatever it is you ponies eat! Grass, I think!">Little racist."Imagine a giant thing made of grass just standing in front of you, wouldn't it make you hungry!?">I still wouldn't actually eat a sentient thing who's the only reason I'm alive!"...is the second part a qualifier, or?">She still is the reason you didn't die."I'm just clarifying."'Hello! Um, I think I can just... grow some crystals, if you're hungry. I mean I usually do it the long way, but I am a magical giant super being. Surely, I can grow crystals.'>..."..."'Yeah I don't know how to do that.'"I'M EATING HER!"'Oh sure, I give you guys time to figure it out, but when it's my turn!'>She has a point."And I have many points! I'm not getting erased from the universe on an empty stomach!"'He wouldn't let her erase you, you remind him too much of his babymama.'"STOP REMINDING ME ABOUT TH-huh.">Huh?"...Ponies and dragons can make babies!?">I think-'SHHH! Don't distract her!'"How would that... work?"'Saved my ass, literally.'"...would the egg hatch INSIDE?"
>>41177705That does sound painful thinking about it.
>>41177705Friendship can pull anything off.
>>41177842so do bites.
>>41178042Hips unfortunately cannot, ask grandpa.
>>41177631Come to think of it, cants Pinkie make cakes?
>>41178810She can. But she won’t undercut a business!
>Silver Spoon"Filthy Rich"~~~>Alright, flags here, get your flags here! Are you team Applejack, or Team Celestia! Who's gonna do the most damage!"...Is it really smart to be pitting them against each other?">What you should be asking instead is, how many Team Chitania's should I make?"...">AND... if I make a Team Shining Armor... whom do I mean?"...you scare me sometimes.">Thank you so much!
>>41179359>Sunset"Silver Spoon"~~~~~>...Sunset looks to the flag, emboldened with TEAM CHITANIA on the front.>...Looks to the filly, smiling away.>...I know I'm playing right into your hooves...Pulls out a couple bits.>But you're right."Thank you for your patronage!"
>>41179596LikeAFiddle
>>41179596>Fizzle“Silver Spoon”~~~>Jokes on you bitch I’m broke! Ha!“We have a payment plan!”>You daughter of a bitch… I’m in
>>41180122>Jokes on her, I'll just reset the universe!"Legally binding.">...On a universal scale?"Yep.">THE FU
>>41180313Lawyers beat faust, it's canon
>>41180447But Salt is in a whole other jurisdiction
>>41180682he’s in theirs.
>>41178810>Pinkie~~~>… if I make cakes with my magic, does it come… out of me?…>Is this cannibalism?
>>41181386I think it’s self love
>>41181386>Pinkie“Dash”~~~>Who wants a cake that came out of my body?“Don’t… don’t say it like that.”>Is that a noooo?“… you know it’s not…”
>>41181950>Delight"Dash"~>You know, Pinkie's cake tastes more tart than I thought it would."STOP SAYING IT LIKE THAT!">Oh? Did you want to give me yours?"No!">...it's got a hint of-"I will just beat you and keep eating.">Can't blame me for trying!
>>41182123She appreciates the compliment I'm sure!
NC>Salt"Chitania'~~~~>Why did we let her do the chargeup!? WHY!? She did it right in front of us!"I came up here to punch and didn't punch.">We are so STUPID."...">...oh damn we're gonna lose, aren't we?"Probably.">I could be getting laid right now.
>>41182667>WHY DO WE LET THEM POWER UP
>>41182962Shonen courtesy
>>41183102it also regular courteous.
>>41183102>We’re villains, not RUDE
>>41182962>Salt“Chitania”~~~~>Wait! We can still make this work!“How!?”>We let them power up, now they’ll do the same to us! They’re heroes, they won’t be bigger jokes than us!“Brilliant! AHHHHHHHH-“Zap!>Oh no they’re smart!“Smart and ASSHOLES!
NC>Applejack"Faust"~~~~>..."Don't.">..."Don't do it.">..."You need to punch the villains.">..."Punch the villains!">...Ah've gotta question-"I KNOOWWWWW!"
>>41184276>Ah' just wanted to know iffin' ya' had tips on how to win."Oh.">But since ya' brought it up, Ah' notice us earth ponies got screwed on the magic side of things-"I'M WORKING ON IT!"
>>41184276NC>Salt"Chitania"~~~~~>Wait, does she seriously expect us to just, punch?"...are you not expecting that?">We are literally CONCEPTS right now! I am the actual embodiment of the paradox of magic! I explain mass shifting and the creation of new energy in defiance of equivalent exchange! And you think I'm just going to hit her with my hooves!?"...I mean I'm gonna.">I CAN EMPOWER THE CONCEPT OF CREATION!"Best be creating some hooves and throwing them, then!"
>>41184917Yes butPunch
>>41185228It’s just more direct
