>>41615750
Probably better than most humans. They're herbivores.

>>41615750
They can release their liquor into my mouth at any time they want.

>>41615758
Are herbivores better at drinking alcohol or something?

Unlike humans, ponies cannot easily get drunk. Equines produce an enzyme in their liver called alcohol dehydrogenase. This enzyme is good at converting the alcohol in beer to simple sugars for the body to absorb.

>>41616553
Things that eat cellulose (and ponies do, we see them eating "hay-"whatevers all the time) are always producing alcohols in their digestive system. Like >>41616569 said, their livers are very good at getting rid of the alcohol.
They probably could drink beer as easily as water.

I suspect, with magic involved, that cider that they press out is at least 80 proof. They probably like booze as much as they like sweets.

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>>41616600
I think they just regularly drink alcoholic cider. Doesn't need to be cranked up to insane levels.

is this the new drunk ponies thread?

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>>41616706
No, it's the old drunk ponies thread. Inebriated hags only.

>>41616719
uoh tfw no scandal causing sloppy toppy from drunk mayor mare

>>41616719
Why is she blushing?

>>41616719
where is my drunk filly thread?

>>41616834
Fillies aren't allowed to drink, silly.

>>41616842
and I'm not allowed within 150 feet of the school but do you think that stops me?

>>41616829
Because she's drunk.

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>>41616842
that's not going to stop them

>>41616869
Are you sure you want them to be drinking? Even a little filly could drink a grown man under the table.

>>41616879
I'm sure I could drink more than a filly.

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>>41616891
Overconfidence like that is exactly how those fillies get you.

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>>41616569
So Berry Punch is not an alcoholic; she just has a defective liver?

>>41616963
that's usually what alcoholics have

>>41616569
>Equines produce an enzyme in their liver called alcohol dehydrogenase. This enzyme is good at converting the alcohol in beer to simple sugars for the body to absorb.
Uh, anon? That's the same enzyme that humans have in their liver that breaks down alcohol. Ponies irl are not incapable of getting drunk, it's just difficult for two reasons. One, ponies have a much higher body mass than humans, meaning that it would take a disproportionately larger volume of ethanol to reach a blood alcohol level that would produce a drunk state. This would not be the case in mlp ponies, they are smaller. Secondly, irl horses have a a very large liver, meaning that they can eliminate alcohol faster than people. Mlp ponies, on the other hand, are probably more similar in size to people, maybe even smaller.

All that is to say, ponies would be able to get drunk as easy as you and I, maybe easier. It's just difficult to get or keep an irl horse drunk due to the large amount of high concentration alcohol it would take to achieve this, something it would definitely reject due to taste.

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>>41615750
Berry Punch is literally unstoppable.

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>>41617020
So you’re saying there’s a chance

I hope kino anon from the other thread continues his green

>9

>>41618065
OP didn't put in "drunk" or "deranged" so I'm hoping he can still find this thread

>>41618605
I'm here. I'm still writing I promise I'm sorry for slowing down.

>>41618741
the best foods take time to cook, the best greens are the same

>>41618741
Take your time anon, you're writing something that'll last forever. The feeling of pressure to write faster is incredibly minute and short-lasting in comparison. In the meantime we will jack off to berry punch

>>41619085
If you want I made a short one off about Berry Punch being an abusive girlfriend to anon. The ending is very bad though.

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Drunk Shimmy bump

>>41619127
bookmarked

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What other kinds of drinks do ponies like? Surely it’s not just cider

The nightly drunk thread was for blogging faggots and I'm glad it's gone.

>>41621101
definitely wine at least, and maybe the really rambunctious have discovered vodka?

>>41621101
Well, Pinkie wouldn't let ponies go without a bit of spiked punch
Berry Punch and Rarity like wine
And you'd be insane if you think that there aren't more than a few beer-drunk guardsmares hanging around

Bumpo

>>41621246
Never heard of it.

>>41621246
Bro it's been like 10 years, let it go.

This thread won't die under my watch

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>>41623252
My head is going to explode

>>41621354
Is Rarity a white wine or red wine kind of mare?

>>41615750
Rainbow Dash sure drank enough cider today lol berry punch lmao :3

>>41623929
Vodka, straight

Alcohol is just another potion as far as ponies are concerned. They don't understand what is happening when they get drunk and blame it on spells.

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it takes a lot to get a horse drunk

>>41624193
she's just like me frfr wow

I drank almost all of a .750 last night, I think I might need to dry out...

>>41611410
>Pinkie throws it back.
>She just keeps pounding them.
>Them being “your” creations which are just poorly remembered recipes from back home.
>She loves each one all the same.
>You don't even try to keep up anymore, preferring to sip on a couple mixed drinks.
>Maybe a lite cider to top it off at most.
>Pinkie is insatiable.
>The two of you having your very own party for two.
>In your house.
>She tells jokes, you laugh.
>There's an attempt to play games but you lack the equipment and Pinkie is too drunk to remember where she hid hers.
>You play music and dance with each other.
>Your awkward shimmying at first changes to something more loose as Pinkie opens you up.
>You hate dancing.
>But she just has a way with you, with everypony really.
>She's up on her hind legs and leaning on you for balance.
>There's a half drunk glass wrapped in her mane, held up taught somehow.
>You're now slow dancing with each other.
>Or at least swaying side to side, maybe a little gyrating.
>Her hair is downright prehensile.
>She dexterously grips the glass in her mane and tilts it over her mouth.
>It pours out into her throat without ever touching her tongue.
>She swallows the last few drops, finishing it off.
>You’re not sure if you weren’t holding her if she could stand on her own four legs.
>The usual thought creeps in.
>”Care for another drink?”
>”You read my mind. I thought only I could do that.”
>*You let go of Pinkie*
>She twirls around a little bit before falling gracefully into a little coiled up pile.
>Just something quick and easy so you can get back to Pinkie quickly.
>*You mix vodka with orange juice in a plastic cup*
>When you turn around Pinkie is staring at you.
>”What’s up?”
>You ask.
>”You know Nonny, I don’t think I’ve ever had another pony like me so much. Everypony always goes home after the party’s over. But you,”
>She’s heavily slurring again.
>”You’ve spent the last few nights with me. You must really really like me.”
>”Of course I really really like you Pinkie.”
>”I really really like you too.”
>*You kneel down on your knees in front of her*
>”Thirsty?”
>”Mhm.”
>Pinkie takes the Screwdriver from you with both front hooves and instantly chugs it.
>”Can you show me how much you like me?”
>Pinkie lays down on her back with her hind legs spread and her front legs still cradling the empty cup, lapping up the dregs with her tongue.
>Your knees are right in between hers.
>She’s rubbing her thighs against you.
>At this point you no longer care if she can’t remember this.
>It’s either not hurting her or she’s playing some sort of game with you.
>You just don’t know the rules.
>At least you think that’s what’s happening.
>It’s something you can tell yourself to justify how you’re feeling right now.
>What does it matter?
>You’re not a bad person.

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Why are we having back-to-back terminal level alcoholic threads lately?

>>41625356
>You just really really like somepony.
>Pinkie seems to be getting impatient.
>She wraps one of her hind legs around you, pulling you closer.
>Nothing wrong with a little fun, this mare loves fun.
>*You lean over Pinkie, supporting yourself with one hand and placing the other just below her navel*
>*You run your hand up towards her neck, slowly as she smiles and coos in delight*
>Your hand envelopes her small neck and your thumb strokes her chin.
>She's dropped the cup now.
>Her hooves mirror yours but go down your chest, slowly.
>She reaches your waist band and tugs at it.
>*You brace yourself on your knees to better support your weight*
>With your balance ready your other hand leaves Pinkie's side and wraps underneath her ass.
>She fits just right with one hand on her shoulder and the other reaching under her backside.
>It's easy to grind your crotch into her.
>Pinkie grinds back.
>”Anon, tell me you like me.”
>Her expression of happiness starts to fade.
>”I like you.”
>*You start undoing your pants*
>”Tell me again.”
>”I like you.”
>Her volume is getting louder and she's shaking her head slightly.
>But she's still pushing back into you.
>You've exposed yourself now, sliding it up against Pinkie's.
>She moans.
>There are tears building up behind closed eyelids.
>”Tell me how much you like me.”
>You don't answer with words.
>You answer with slow, strong thrust.
>Pushing Pinkie into your hand that squeezes her tightly and pulls her back towards you.
>She's writhing in your grip, moving her hips and waist into yours.
>Both of her hind legs are trying to wrap around you, refusing to let you go.
>Her head sways from side to side, mumbling “tell me” in between her soft and squeaky moans.
>A set of tear drops roll out of both her eyes.
>But neither of you stop moving, stop inhaling each other.
>With the alcohol in your system this goes on for a long while, slow and steady.
>You spend the night with Pinkie.

…

Should I add the NSFW tag on pone paste for this update or maybe just suggestive?

>>41625357
Drinking is bad for you. It makes you make bad decisions.

>>41625359
I read it at work but I'm also drinking on the job

>>41625390
Didn't tell me you also work in transportation or construction?

>>41625430
nah, I wish. IT

>>41625390
>>41625432
Hey, me too, not drinking time yet here though

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>>41625390
>Browsing 4chan at work while drinking

>>41625390
Holy based

>>41623929
Red wine looks more classy.

>>41625357
Mare and alcohol both contain the letter A
This is no coincidence

>>41615750
Who would drink more: Berry Punch or one Slavic man?

>>41623929
As long as it comes in large quantities from a box.

>>41623929
She's the pretentious sort. Champagne.

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>>41626653
I'm betting on the small, magical horse.

>>41627390
You sure? There was a polish man with 1.48 BAC who died not because of the booze but because he was in a car crash.
It might be a battle that would result in the entire liquor store drying up.

>>41626653
>unstoppable force vs immovable object

>>41625364
Lead me not unto temptation, for I can find it by myself.

>>41626653
>toon force vs slavic alcohol tolerance
honestly, I'm not sure

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>>41625359
Not sure, but it's practically the perfect level of spice for me. Keep writing you glorious horsefucker.

>>41625357
Election season cope.

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>>41626653
It would be close but I have to go with Berry

>>41625359
>she just wants to be loved
Too real

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>>41625070
It's canon that undoing a mind-control spell on a pony leaves them with a terrible hangover. They'd probably consider getting drunk some kind of stupification magic.

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>>41627390
I don’t think Fluttershy would smoke weed, she probably has a colony of leafcutter ants that grow her psilocybin or something

>>41632873
New headcanon

Get the fuck out of page 10 there is unfinished business

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Drunken mares. Slovenly even.

>>41634672
Can’t spell slovenly without love

>>41616700
I love this gif

>>41634264
I'm sorry I've been slacking off if you're looking for more green. I've been sick to the point of being delirious.

>>41632873
leafcutters don't grow psylocybin though, they grow a specialized fungus that can no longer live without them

>>41636702
She should talk to the cows. They're definitely loaded with that fungus that grows magic mushrooms.

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>>41615750
But how good or bad are ponies at...
...holding out hope for a better future?
...holding their pee?
...holding up a liquor store?
...holding their breath?
...holding back tears?
...holding their farts?
...holding the other team to only two touchdowns?
...holding a note?
...holding their cum?
...holding a pose?
...holding the door open for really slow old people?
...holding onto money?
...holding on to the football when getting rammed into by Troy Polamalu?
...holding their eyelids open?

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>>41637000
>holding their pee?
Imagine Apple Bloom blushing deeply, crossing her hind legs tightly as her tail flicks frantically and squeaking out, "A-Anon, ah cain't hold back anymore... ah!" and you look and a thin stream of apple juice is running down her leg.

>>41637617
Why wouldn't she just piss anywhere. She's a horse.

>>41638243
We're having this conversation inside where there's carpet, maybe on a train or something.
Luckily for her my reflexes are good and I can swoop in to catch it with my lips and tongue.

>>41637617
Simply piss out the window
Not a hard concept

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>>41637617
>apple family pisses apple juice
unf

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>>41637000
>holding on to the football when getting rammed into by Troy Polamalu?
Fucking lmao, imagine
>"Look, Anon! I got it! I got the ball!"
>Cue a veritable freight train of a man barreling toward the poor mare at Mach 7
>The last thing she sees before blacking out is a mane longer than her own, the laurel wreath of the bloodlusted Samoan currently descending upon her with all the tenderness of an epileptic walrus

>>41636702
Maybe they will if she asks nicely

>>41639059
If she moves or is moved too suddenly she'll end up pissing herself.

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>>41627390
My wife is not a stoner. Please apologize.

>>41625359
>There are hammers competing to kill you inside your skull.
>Rightfully so when you made no attempt to mitigate a hangover from last night.
>You are in your bed currently, tossing and turning from the pain.
>You can feel the violent shits coming on too.
>The best part about binge drinking.
>You don’t even have a cute pony to cheer you up this time.
>You opted to let Pinkie sleep by herself on the couch this time.
>The less she knows the better.

…

>There are hammers throwing a party inside your skull.
>How were you supposed to know that mixing vodka with vodka and even more vodka was bad for you?
>You are on the couch when you wake up.
>Nonny’s couch.
>It smells like him, or maybe that’s just you.
>You did it again.
>You got so drunk you don’t remember much.
>Although you’re pretty sure it was a good time at least.
>Your hooves run up and down your body.
>It’s like there’s a memory there but you can’t pin it down, just the feelings.
>*You smack your ass*
>”Feels good though.”
>No one hears you.
>*You roll off the couch again*
>Back on all four hooves you shake out all the negative sensations going through your body, ending with the tip of your tail as you flick them off.
>You feel better already.
>But Nonny probably isn’t.
>He can’t really explain why but he just doesn’t get over rough nights the same way ponies do.
>Well he made your breakfast last time, so it’s only right you make him some now.
>*You bounce over to the kitchen*
>Seems you didn’t have time to put away all your liquor from last night.
>Maybe Nonny would appreciate a Bloody Mary?
>*You make one up snappy*
>A quick sippy to test the flavor.
>You slightly gag from how spicy it is.
>It’s perfect for him.
>*You start on the rest of breakfast*
>A little bit of time passes as you cook, Nonny finally shows up wearing his blankets.
>He’s sluggish and sloppy looking, stumbling through his house.
>”Good morning Pinka.”
>”Gooooood morning Nonny.”
>Your little trill on the word makes him smile.
>That makes you smile.
>Nonny sits himself down at his table, looking like a funny hermit pony-man thing in his blanket.
>It causes you to giggle.
>You're just about done whipping up some fried potatoes and eggs, just like he did for you.
>They really are the best.
>Some ponies say that it's immoral to eat the eggs because then you're not really a vegetarian or vegan or whatever.
>But it's not like you're eating actual babies.
>And the chickens don't seem to mind and heck even Fluttershy agrees and she can talk to animals so she's gotta know what's up.
>”And I'm just like, imagine trying to make a cake without eggs?”
>*You serve two full plates onto the table*
>”You know?”
>Nonny nods his head slowly at you.
>Yeah he knows.

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>>41640728
>He's always been a good listener.
>Nonny points at the bright red drink with the accommodating umbrella you've left him.
>*You give him a little wink*
>He takes a sip from it and doesn't wince even a little.
>How does he do that?
>The two of you munch on breakfast while smiling internmently.
>You'd love to stay and chat but you really need to stop being late for work.
>Of the few things you remember that was one of them.
>*You take the last bite off your plate*
>”Well. I would really love to stay and chat but-”
>”You really need to stop being late for work?”
>”Now I definitely know you can read my mind.”
>Nonny wiggles his fingers at you as he makes a spooky “oooooh” sound.
>The both of you giggle at each other and you turn around to leave.
>”Hey Pinkie?”
>”Yes Nonny?”
>”Do you wanna do this with me again? Tonight?”
>”Really?!”
>Nonny looks a little unenthused at your enthusiasm.
>Was it something you said?
>”Yes yes of course. We can even just have our party for two right here again.”
>”That sounds totally super to me.”
>Your front hoof is buzzing.
>*You pull it to your face and check the time on the watch that doesn't exist*
>”Shoot. I've gotta gallop.”
>And you do, right out of Nonny’s house.
>The last thing either of you said to the other was “see ya later” right as you exited through his front door.
>The last thing until later that day anyways.
>Nonny came to see you after work this time.
>Both of you went back to his place again.
>You got absolutely shredded, downright cranked again.
>By next morning you had forgotten most of what happened again.
>The most important thing you can remember is that Nonny had a good time with you.
>So you'll ask him to drink more with you even if neither of you remember how much fun it was.
>Like, as long as somepony is having fun then what else matters?
>Right?

…

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>>41640733
Ah, I do love a good update.

>>41641112
>No hooves

>>41640733
Does she know???

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>>41641965
>Does she know?

Bump

>>41641965
She’s gotta know, there’s just no way she doesn’t
…right?

>>41640733
>Some time has passed since you first started binge drinking regularly with Nonny.
>It’s every night or at least every other night with him.
>Although he told you he needed to slow down a bit since he was getting sick of the bile in his mouth the next morning.
>You don’t mind the bile.
>So it’s mostly you going over to his place or he to yours and you drink way, way too much for most ponies.
>You know it’s bad for you.
>You know you could probably drink less too.
>But it’s the only way you have fun with Nonny anymore.
>Or at least you always have a drink when you’re having fun around him.
>Not the other way around obviously.
>It’s not that you aren’t having a good time, one where nopony gets hurt either.
>But what Rarity and Applejack said to you at the start has been living in your brain.
>Other ponies too, they’ve started treating you differently.
>Some of them seem to take offense to your late night partying with Nonny.
>Some of them seem sorry for you, you don’t know why.
>There’s nothing to feel bad about.
>You’ve done nothing wrong.
>And yet.
>Rarity and AJ haven’t bothered you since the first time.
>They seem to be busy arguing with each other over it and the correct way to go about things.
>Shows what they know.
>Applejack might be able to plan a hoedown and Rarity a soiree, but you’re Pinkie Pie.
>You’re THE party expert.
>So what would they know about parties for two that you don’t?
>You should really stop dwelling on this so much.
>Thinking never got anypony anywhere.
>You’re pretty swamped in your own head when a pony taps you on the shoulder.
>”Pinkie? I’ve been standing behind you saying your name for a while now.”
>”Oh I’m sorry Mr Cake. What can I do for you?”
>”The missus and I are doing some foal stuff that needs our attention but we have an order that needs to go. Would you mind delivering it for us?”
>He gives you a slip of paper with the details.
>”Okie dokie Mr. Cake. Not a problem at all for your number one employee.”
>”You’re my only employee.”
>”Indeedy.”
>*You salute him playfully but enthusiastically*
>He rolls his eyes but smiles and then hands you the slip.
>”Thank you Pinkie.”
>”No problem mister C.”
>Mister C runs off back whence he came, wherever that may be.
>*You inspect the paper*
>It’s just plain bread.
>And it’s going to be sent to Fluttershy’s Cottage.
>Oh!
>Well why didn’t she say so?
>You could have brought her some lame old bread lickety split.
>She didn’t have to go through the effort of ordering it.
>Oh well, makes for a good excuse to go see your friend and take your mind off things.

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>>41643370
Two in one day?

>>41643370
The cracks begin to show
I hope she’ll be ok

>>41643661
Holy fucking Pinkie is so fucking cute I just want to hug her so fucking much it hurts

>>41644281
don't hug her so much it hurts her anon, just hug her normal

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>>41644600
NO. I LOVE HER TOO MUCH

AAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHH

>>41617020
what about tall ponies like celestia and luna?

>>41615750
Even at 3-4' tall, a pony is going to have a greater total blood volume than you, and therefore a higher threshold for getting pissed. What this effectively means is that Anon is the cheapest date in Equestria.

Woe.

>>41617020
real ponies are small, so do are there any reports of one getting drunk?

>>41644769
and I don't even drink so I'm the cheapest of the cheap dates

>10

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>>41641431
Look man, it's what I had.

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>>41646563
May I offer this soothing tonic in this troubled times?

>>41643370
Is pinkie the type to press charges for being too drunk to consent? The overall happiness of the world increased because of her marehood being used

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>>41643370
Oh shit, intervention time.

>>41647412
Lawyers some exist in Equestria.

>>41648355
Lawyers don't*

>>41649073
cute dronk

>>41649073
ONE NINETY PROOF STRAIGHT VODKA

>>41646563
Ponk is so fucking cute bros
How is she so perfect

>>41647798
You’re totally right, didn’t even think about it until you said it

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>>41649974
This man's looking at an alcoholic thinking "she's perfect".
Based.

>>41651202
Alcoholism is normal where I'm from, something about an abnormal amount of bars.

>>41651202
Damn straight

>>41643661
I want to sk8 with Ponk

>>41643370
Inb4 it’s a house party instead of an intervention

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>>41653751
More like horse party

>>41654372
Fuck I didn’t spoiler the image. Joke ruined everybody go home

>>41654381
And you didn't use a ponified version of the picture.

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Tipsy ponies make the world go round

>>41655175
>Tipsy ponies feel the world spin around.
corrected

bump

>>41643370
>Mr. Cake has left the bread neatly wrapped and ready to go for you.
>*You put it in your saddlebag and throw it on*
>Time to go.
>As you’re halfway to the exit a couple ponies come inside.
>”Oh hi Pinkie. We were looking for-”
>”Sorry, gotta run. You can just ask one of the Cakes for help. Ok love you gotta go bye!”
>You’ve got no time to help these customers with your super urgent delivery.
>They’ll be fine.
>*You flip the sign on the door and lock it as you leave*
>It’s a nice day out.
>Nothing like some fresh air through Ponyville to straighten you out.
>*You trot merrily towards the edge of town and Flutter’s home*
>Everypony you pass gets a wave and a smile.
>Even the ones who don’t wave and smile back.
>Which seems to be more than zero lately.
>You don’t like that.
>But you know it’s ok, that doesn’t mean they don’t like you.
>Cranky doesn’t always wave at you either.
>It just means that that pony isn’t in a very wavey and smiley mood.
>And that’s okay.
>That doesn’t bother you.
>Your hair is only slightly unfrazzled when you get to Fluttershy’s.
>A hot pot of various animals can be heard the closer you get.
>Oh you can’t wait to knock on Fluttershy’s door and have Fluttershy answer and get to see and talk with Fluttershy.
>You think as you stare at the door, waiting.
>”Ok now.”
>*You knock eight times very fast*
>The door opens.
>”Why helloooo Pinkie Pie. What a surprise to see you here.”
>Oh.
>”Hello Discord.”
>”I was just thinking how much I could use a visit from the local baker. You see Fluttershy is all out of a particular kind of bread she uses for some local fauna.”
>*You sigh and roll your eyes*
>”You wouldn't happen to be looking for this bread?”
>*You show him the delivery*
>”Oh my sweet goodness. Why yes, that is exactly what I need.”
>”Well you ordered it didn't you?”
>”Oh I must have. Since I'm such a good friend of Fluttershy’s and I know she needed more.”
>*You laugh it off*
>At least he's just doing something nice for Fluttershy.
>Yeah, you should be happy.
>”Well, here you go.”
>”Oh what a gem you are.”
>He doesn't thank you.
>He does stare at you after you give him the bread.
>He’s smiling and biting his lip, he looks like he’s about to explode.
>”Is there something else I can do for you Discord?”
>”Now that you mention it,”
>In a flash he has teleported you and himself into Fluttershy’s home.
>Together, you are sitting on the couch.
>Random critters laying around the house scatter as you appear out of thin air.
>”I've been hearing so much around Ponyville about you lately.”
>”Ponies always have something nice to say about me. I'm Pinkie Pie.”
>”Oh but it's not nice things I'm hearing.”
>His movements are serpent like, slinking from side to side around you.
>Suddenly he's in front of you.

>>41656102
>”All sorts of ponies talking about you in naughty, scandalous ways.”
>”Well, I have noticed… No. They wouldn't really say things like that. Everypony loves me. I'm Pinkie.”
>Discord makes the outside how you're inside feels.
>How he wants you to feel.
>There's no light coming from the windows, no more chirps and tweets from the outside.
>Mucus colored slime falls from the ceiling around you.
>”Psst.”
>A little attention getting squeak is missed by your ears.
>But not by Discord’s
>”Psst!”
>You're in your own little world right now.
>Discord poofs over to the source of the sound.
>It's Fluttershy in the kitchen, peeking around the corner.
>”What's the matter Fluttershy? I thought that was going rather well.”
>”Discord, you might be going a bit overboard with the whole nightmare realm.”
>”Really? I think it rather ties it all together.”
>”Uhm. That's okay then I guess.”
>Discord is about to puff back with a snap of his fingers.
>But he slows down when he looks at Fluttershy.
>Like she's speaking to him without words.
>Scolding more like.
>”Alright alright. I'll cut to the chase.”
>”Thank you.”
>Discord teleports back to the couch next to you.
>He waves away all the creeping darkness and ooze.
>”Look Pinkie, a little birdie told me that you enjoy the, shall we say, the bottle more than others.”
>”Are you calling me an alcoholic? I'll have you know I don't drink more than any other pony.”
>”I get the feeling there's a lot you'd say you don't do more than other ponies.”
>”Oh yeah? Name one.”
>”Oh I don't know. Eating cake and dancing?”
>An involuntary scoff comes out of you.
>”I do not eat more cake or dance more than other ponies!”
>”Be that as it may. You certainly suffer the mornings after much more than other ponies, and it's always with that same ape-like creature.”
>”I don't have any kind of problem. I don't eat too much or drink too much or party so much I can't remember it.”
>*You cross your hooves and recede into the couch*
>Discord leaves you again to go talk to Fluttershy.
>This time you are aware and see them whispering back and forth.
>Discord seems frustrated and Fluttershy keeps pointing between you and him and then backing down.
>”Hey!”
>They both turn to you.
>”I don't like it when ponies talk about me behind my back!”
>Fluttershy is not being very forthcoming.
>”Um, we're not?”
>”Oh forget it Fluttershy. I have a much better idea.”
>Discord snaps himself out of existence and then back next to you.
>He's holding something now.

>>41656106
>It looks like a potato but wrong.
>It's covered in roots that are wriggling and trying to grab anything they can.
>Its brown colored skin texture moves around on it.
>”Pinkie I've just had an idea.”
>He pulls out your hooves into an accepting shape and drops the thing-tato into them.
>”Take this and go see that zebra witch in the woods. Ask her to use it in the base of a potion for you. She'll recognize it.”
>It moves around in your grasp.
>”What… what is it?”
>”It is the answer to your problems.”
>”I don't have any problems except other ponies telling me what to do.”
>Fluttershy waves at you from the corner she's still creeping behind from.
>”Pinkie please take it. He's trying his best I promise. Please.”
>”His best to do what?”
>She moves her mouth barely but you can't hear any words, just a couple of wheezy squeaks.
>Discord flies directly in front of you, enveloping your vision.
>”Oh please Pinkamina. I'm trying so hard to be a good friend. Be a good friend to me, to us,” as he pulls back to show off Fluttershy.
>”Take my gift and use it right. It'll solve all your problems whether you have them or not.”
>*You groan*
>You should be a good friend.
>*You put the thing-tato into your saddle bag*
>”Okaaaay. I Pinkie promise stick a cupcake in my eye that I will take it to Zecora.”
>”Oh thank you so much Pinkie. You don't know how happy you've made me.”
>Fluttershy gives a quiet applause in the background.
>”Well. I better get back to Sugar Cube Corner. Gotta lot of cakes to bake.”
>”Toodeloo!”
>Your yellow pegasus friend is still hiding in the kitchen when she waves goodbye to you.
>As you get up to leave you wave back at her.
>You're not entirely sure how busy Sugar Cube is but you'd love to be anywhere but here right now.
>*You give your final farewells and exit through Fluttershy’s front door*

...

>>41656102
>hot pot of various animals
FLUTTERSHY NO
hodgepodge?

>>41656110
That could’ve gone a lot worse all things considered, but I still can’t help but feel bad for her. In all likelihood she knows she has a problem, but admitting it is just too difficult, embarrassing, scary and a million other things. We’ve all been there.

>>41656117
No I meant hot pot. I've been rewatching the tamers episodes.

>>41656145
I can quit anytime I want. Admitting you have a problem is admitting you're wrong and fuck that.

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>10
it can't die yet, she needs to go to Zecora

>>41656873
I have to sleep at some point

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>>41656106
>>”What's the matter Fluttershy? I thought that was going rather well.”
>>”Discord, you might be going a bit overboard with the whole nightmare realm.”
>>”Really? I think it rather ties it all together.”
>>”Uhm. That's okay then I guess.”
>>Discord is about to puff back with a snap of his fingers.
>>But he slows down when he looks at Fluttershy.
>>Like she's speaking to him without words.
>>Scolding more like.
>>”Alright alright. I'll cut to the chase.”
>>”Thank you.”
I love her so much bros

Not very

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>>41657715

>>41657720
I can’t believe Berry is fucking dead

>>41658489
I've woken up after shit like that and ponies are way tougher than me.

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>>41658489
Not to worry. She'll be right as rain after a few moments, and then we can all get back to the important stuff.

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>>41658951
Yeah, I did something like that once.

>>41656110

>Work has been slow today at the Post Office.
>You've had lots of free time to shoot the shit with your coworker Partin Parcel.
>Mostly your usual homosexual tension jokes, playing chicken up each other’s thighs, and asking in depth hypotheticals about kissing each other in increasingly obscure and strange situations.
>Partin finishes laughing at your last question involving him, zebras, and the consistency of their heads after being blown off.
>There’s a moment of silence.
>”So Anon.”
>”So Partin.”
>”Are you and Pinkie a thing?”
>”What do you mean by that?”
>Partin pulls a chair around, sitting on it backwards and resting his face and hooves and the back.
>”You know like, you two are fucking right?”
>”I don’t know what would give you that impression.”
>”Because you are with her every night and have been for like a month or something.”
>”But Partin, don’t you know?”
>”Huh?”
>”I’m gay.”
>The both of you share a stare.
>Then Partin starts giggling.
>You join in.
>”But really though.”
>”No I mean. We’re not like dating or something like that.”
>Partin gets up on his hindlegs and mimes humping the air and slapping the ass that is the target of said humping.
>”But you are slamming ham?”
>”I don’t, I would really rather we not talk about this.”
>”Well why not.”
>”I just don’t wanna man.”
>*You cross your arms*
>”Alright. My bad. I’ll drop it.”
>Partin sits back down on the chair facing correctly this time.
>The air is thick and heavy now between the two of you.
>Why is it anypony else’s business whether or not you were sleeping with Pinkie?
>Why were they talking behind your back about it?
>You wish they would mind their own business and leave you and Pinkie alone.
>Partin wasn’t the first to ask.
>At first it was much more light hearted questions from ponies being their light hearted selves.
>Asking when you are gonna get married and have a bunch of foals.
>But some of them were more aggressive.
>Getting in your face and confronting you, saying “it ain’t right to be treatin’ a mare that way”.
>Such ponies should not be named.
>You just brushed them off.

>>41661408
>Most of them stopped bugging you but they treated you differently now.
>You could feel the judging glares from ponies you’ve never met.
>Did they know what you were actually doing to Pinkie?
>Were they telling her?
>Or were they just thinking of you as being an enabler for a pony who is drinking too much.
>Pinkie’s a grown mare.
>She can decide to cut herself off, that’s not your fault.
>She’s responsible for her own actions, sober or drunk.
>Your conversation with Partin is reverting you to how you used to be before coming to Ponyville.
>You hate it.
>Should have never gone through with any of this.
>Forget walking Pinkie home that night, it would have been better to have just stayed home that night.
>People or ponies talking about you, pointing fingers at you.
>You hate yourself.
>*You stare at the clock to count the minutes before going home*
>At least when you leave you can be with Pinkie.
>She doesn’t judge you.
>You wonder what she’s doing right now.
>You and Partin continue to work slowly in silence.

…

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Hoof Dangit Anons.

I'm going Drug and Cider Free from this day forward.

I can't risk messing up my chance with the Mare of my life. Especially not for dumb Endorphins or pick-me-ups.

Am I going this Alone?
Any other pony Dry?

I'm throwing all my bottles away and The Decanter. It's not worth it one bit. I Hope she forgives me. If not, Atleast I know I won't have stupid Cider making stupid Desicions for me.

What did they say in No Country for aold Colts? we've been putting it up Our whole lives, we just didn't know it?

Well Now I know and now I'm taking control.
I've Glorified It for too long.
These words Celestial I vow.

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>>41661501

>>41615750
Well they don't have any fingers so I have to imagine pretty bad

>>41661412
Anon being a lil bitch who can't look himself in the mirror.
>Falling into a mutually self destructive path of heavy binge drinking and fucking a blacked out pinkie every day for a month.
>"Waaah, why are ponies judging me."
They both need to be tied to a chair in a dark room and slapped until they say what they are both coping for, that they love each other, rather than playing this self destructive game of pretend and get a better way to spend time together.
Hopefully Discord's magical antabuse or whatever will force them to get a perspective.

But for real, keep up the story! It's captivating!

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>>41661566
The ending will be Anon writing a book on codependency that turns into a best selling novel. Then he'll marry Rarity and leave her for her underage sister.

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>>41661501
Never developed a habit to challenge my principles. Never drink alone and never drink outside the weekends. And never before the evening/late afternoon too, is a given. I got shit to do and a buzz won't make me do the do. I'm good, thank you.

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>>41661557

bumping for more green

which of the m6 gets drunk fastest

>>41662960
Fluttershy, she never drinks alone and rarely goes out so her tolerance is shit

>>41662318
Rarity. But she'll claim that it's Fluttershy.

>>41663118
>>41663043
Which pony has been drinking too much and misquoted?

>>41663134
fluttershy had one (1) cider and left the flutterrape thread to talk shit

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Drunken mature mares. In YOUR area.

>>41663741
So long she stays out of my stash