Previous thread:
>>42848395
>>42816069

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2nd for best 2uo!
Enjoy this conveniently packaged Tuna: https://www.fimfiction.net/story/547936/a-gifts-meaning

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Good, you fixed it. I can repost my bitching about this fic here.

>https://www.fimfiction.net/story/66500/maternal-instinct
A fic where changelings are post-WW2 Imperial Japan and Chryssy Hissy is a massively inbred lunatic with a similarly inbred daughter.

I... guess I liked this? Like I get that the author wanted some changelings to have a clear difference in culture but the main thing here is like, even ignoring the central conflict is Chrysalis beating her innocent mentally challenged daughter to death in a fit of inbred rage and severely regretting it it kind of acts like a lot of central issues are resolved when... they aren't.

Like yeah at the end she makes good on her promises to be a better parent, but like
>daughter has issues partially because Chrysalis refuses to educate her, even though she's at least smart enough to be able to understand situations and can write and express herself. She's like 7-8 years old but has the mentality of a 4-5 year old with some physical disabilities
>the changelings are royalists who make it clear there needs to be an heir to the dynasty on the throne or there'll be a huge ass succession crisis and a national catastrophe, but Chrysalis is so heavily inbred that all but one of her massively numbered children died. In order to solve that the issue is to marry her daughter off to her first cousin

So what happens at the end after Celestia, the schoolteacher, intervenes?
>daughter is treated and coddled like even more of a baby to the point of getting to sleep in a crib and is basically breastfed Alex style, no progress on education and the fact that Chrysalis refuses to do anything of the sort isn't treated as a problem that needed to be addressed by anyone, particularly odd because Chrysalis agrees to go to therapy but the option for anything of the sort for her now traumatized daughter and Celestia, who ends up adoring her and is the one pushing for Chrysalis to be a better parent also sees no apparent issue with this
>they're still going to make her fuck her first cousin, even if it's clearer that he's not a bad kid, despite it being apparent that they're both so massively inbred that they wouldn't be able to have a kid in the first place

Little buggy Charles II deserves better than this.

>>42848739
>It's Japan
>Surprised that it's a fucked up shithole socially

>>42848747
Fic where Fluttershy is pissed that all her imported changeling CAV porn is censored?

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>>42848739
>Chrysalis beating her innocent mentally challenged daughter to death in a fit of inbred rage
I don't know why this surprised me considering it's fimfiction, but damn I laughed hard.

I love HIE

>>42848739
>Chrysalis beating her innocent mentally challenged daughter to death in a fit of inbred rage
officially adding to my list of bizarre & hilariously cruel fimfic things.
next to Luna desperately trying to keep her newborn baby alive on the lunar surface only for her to suffocate while luna wails in silence

>>42848782
>officially adding to my list of bizarre & hilariously cruel fimfic things.
There's a lot of fics where it's like "Yeah this character did quite possibly the most heinous and unjustifiable thing possible but he feels really REALLY bad about it".

Which sometimes I like, but Dalinar burning a whole city alive (including his wife by accident) feels less personally godawful then Chrysalis repeatedly slamming a second grader against a wall because she accidentally spilled ink on her sheets.

>>42848789
>Yeah this character did quite possibly the most heinous and unjustifiable thing possible but he feels really REALLY bad about it
I'm still waiting on a pony adaptation of Crime and Punishment.

Countering my incestuous dynasty problems with additional incest.

I love stories with pony protagonists

>>42848823
Wow, so brave. What's next? You like stories with conclusions? Thematic consistency? Dialogue?

>>42848826
Yes.

Do we still lack the literary giants to pen good HIE stories?

>>42848919
It's not a matter of size, but concepts void of concept. Even the greatest chemist cannot turn lead into gold.

>>42848924
The HIE genre is not for the faint of heart. It’s not just about sending humans into the world of Equestria; it’s about transcending the boundaries of fiction itself. Just as you wouldn't expect to stumble upon a Shakespearean play in a high school drama class, or find the nuances of a Tolstoy novel in a community book club, you simply cannot expect mere /fimfic/ posters to grasp and master the profound depths and soul-stirring complexities of the HIE genre. It's the apex of storytelling. Too intricate, too delicate, too soulful for most to comprehend, let alone capture in writing. The problem isn’t with the genre. The issue lies in its towering grandeur, which is just too monumental for the average writer. We don't lack good HIE stories; we lack the literary giants to pen them.

>>42848739
>sleep in a crib and is basically breastfed Alex style
What? Is that supposed to be depicted as a good thing in this fic?

>>42848930
Yes. Which is especially weird because at the beginning of the story it's shown her cousin gets the same thing done to him and it's framed as coddling him in a negative way.

>Chrysalis Junior, who cannot comprehend cryptocurrency and wants to suckle Chrysalis

>>42848789
>"Yeah this character did quite possibly the most heinous and unjustifiable thing possible but he feels really REALLY bad about it".
All About Rarity moment.

>>42848965
At least I can see Chrysalis being an incest-laden maelstrom of child abuse and it being in-character.

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I felt pity for a rat today.
Fluttershy fics for this feel?

>>42848739
I don't remember how I came across this story so long ago, but it was weird, yeah. Did Princess Celestia ever save the ponies Queen Chrysalis was fucking eating like a vampire? It was weird how she swoops in to save Chrysalis' daughter with ponies being tortured like that.

Didn't the same author also write a story where Sweetie Belle gets maced in a protest about immigration to Equestria, where every single pony against it was stupid and illiterate because they're on the wrong side of history? It was a story about a changeling family who immigrated and lived off government-provided love supplement and shit.

>>42849131
>Did Princess Celestia ever save the ponies Queen Chrysalis was fucking eating like a vampire?
No, because it turns out they are legitimately convicted criminals who are serving sentences for shit like robbery or spraypainting shit.

>>42849131
Lmao I forgot about that starting scene where they just bring out a bunch of ponies trussed up like turkeys that they feed off of like it's no big deal and then it's later retconned to be an ethical consumption under capitalism thing they do to criminals.

What a weird fucking story.

>>42848782
>next to Luna desperately trying to keep her newborn baby alive on the lunar surface only for her to suffocate while luna wails in silence
What if she just chucks it back to Celestia?

>>42848782
>next to Luna desperately trying to keep her newborn baby alive on the lunar surface only for her to suffocate while luna wails in silence
She should've held her in.
^:)

>>42849459
I imagine that would've taken less magic than keeping a foal alive in the vacuum of space.

>>42849459
She gets a soul gem, traps it in that, then years later approaches Twilight and asks her to forge a homunculus from the gem so that her child may live again. Over the next few months as Twilight uses arcane blasphemy to build it, they fall for each other; Luna attracted to her scientific brilliance and empathy, and Twilight strangely attracted to Luna's melancholy.

>>42849521
Will the homunculus call Twilight mom?

>>42849528
By virtue of being married to its mother, yes.

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>>42849521
That's not what Twilight is attracted to.

>>42849537
>That's not what Twilight is attracted to.
White guys in the military?

>>42849559
White guys, yes, but a different kind: >>42844850.

>>42849566
But Travis is filipino

>>42849569
He's a honorary hwite due to being into cryptocurrency.
Sorry, I don't make the rules.

>>42849580
Why does the cryptocurrency grant him whiteness and not wanting to fuck Rarity?

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>>42849521
legally a Tunafic.txt
I still think the Tantabus Mk II is miles ahead as a premise. Just to start with, moon pregnancy is retarded good-canon-incompatible edge, but on top of that Luna should be able to do all that arcane blasphemy without Twilight's help.
Twilight has better reasons for being attracted to Luna too. Like her magnificent plot. And exactly the magical prowess I just mentioned. Twilight could also get herself all steamed up over Luna's ability to make the Tantabus. But you know what Luna would need Twilight's help with? Remanifesting the Tantabus. She probably wouldn't do it by herself.

>>42849590
>Just to start with, moon pregnancy
No no, she's pregnant when Celestia moons her, see.

>>42849590
Clearly the Tantabus was her initial attempt to bond the soul gem with a construct, but it didn't take. She needs lab-grown alchemy, and who knows mad science better than Twilight? Starlight Glimmer? You really want to trust Starlight fucking Glimmer with a homunculus?

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>>42849593
It doesn't matter.

>>42849582
Chasing white trash is a common african american trait.

>>42849601
see >>42849569

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>>42849595
>Who knows mad science better than Twilight?
Luna!

>>42849605
>creates a spider
That's not mad science, that's just spider magic. Twilight is the one who keeps resurrecting Pinkie Pie everytime she dies.

If Twilight is helping resurrect Luna's dead moon baby who's helping Chrysalis learn not to beat her inbred children?

>>42849611
Granny Smith could teach her something about disciplining yung'uns.

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Do you agree or find these bibles useful for writing fanfiction?


https://heyzine.com/flip-book/c197ade347.html
https://heyzine.com/flip-book/abd409087f.html
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1FL3TVUe7UJ7t4DLBkpJF_GpVsX7RGYF7zwkTusGl1Dk/edit?tab=t.0
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1CUhTjglrpYaLk3iJ4iCjv3W-TKYmPbeTiT8hby7vjMg/edit?tab=t.0

https://archive.org/details/MyLittlePonyAdventures-ShowBible
https://jmassat.com/2024/08/05/every-cartoon-pitch-and-writers-bible-on-archive-org/

>>42849613
Learn NOT to beat her inbred children. Granny only fits one half of that equation!

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>>42849608
So what if the spider is cuter and more soulful than Pinkie? That doesn't make the spell any less mad.

>>42849623
>posts a picture of Twilight clearly being the lead mad scientist
You're proving my point.

>>42849623
Luna does not seem sure what to make of what Natural Philosophy has become.

>>42849627
>How does this help us "make a baby" as you say?
>Oh, this potion will make you grow a dick!

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>>42849624
They're just having a good time!

>>42849630
A good time with mad science.

>>42849618
She'd teach her to beat them the proper way!

>>42849631
I'd read a fic where Twilight subjects others to science.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=V83JR2IoI8k

>>42848739
>after Celestia, the schoolteacher, intervenes
>they're still going to make her fuck her first cousin
Based and Sun King-pilled Celestia, setting up the War of the Changeling Succession when the changeling royalty is inevitably rendered sterile and the fertile Equestrian puppet can be placed on the throne.

>>42848782
It's not even really a fimfic thing. It's just adapting Ivan the Terrible beating his son to death in a rage.

>>42849649
Celestia just tacitly approves of incest, that's all. Twilights parents are second cousins you know.

>>42849616
Didn't think I would find you here, I'm the one anon who kept suggesting stuff in those pitch bible threads. To be honest the state that document is in is completely useless for anything fanfic related as a pitch bible is meant for a completely different medium. That's why I always suggested things regarding worldbuilding and characters because those are the only elements that would end up being realistically used out of the whole project and well, that pitch bible has nothing of interest in regards to writing stories set in it. Such a shame it didn't take off with the other anons though, could have been fun to worldbuild stuff as a group.

I could fix her

Hey anons, guess what story this excerpt comes from.
>”Twilight pulled out the card, “The Briar Patch,”

Rarity oooohed, “Oh my, there? You got an invitation? Really? It's the newest club in town, only opened a year ago or so and almost nopony's been able to go. It's an invitation only club but you've got an invitation!” The white unicorn squealed happily, sounding very much like her little sister for a moment, “We should go together, Twilight! It'd be so roma-... I mean, I'd very much like to go, but if you... Um...” Rarity was blushing again, as was Twilight, to her private surprise. The awkward silence lengthened, until Twilight was able to muster up the nerve to break the silence.

“Um... Rarity, would you... Like to go to the club with me?” “
I honestly didn’t expect so much romantic stuff, but it’s not done in a horrible way and RariTwi seems cute as hell..

If I publish a story, and add a chapter to another within a day, will the latter still show up in the "Latest Updates" section?

>>42849597
But what if the Moon is actually a big hollow crystal sphere filled with air and restaurants and theaters and other amenities, and Luna just miscarried?

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>>42849605
my wife is so cute

>>42850125
Well, that would cheapen the story of the two sisters quite a lot, wouldn't it?

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>>42850190

>>42849685
It has something much more important than locations, bestiary, characters. It tells you which contrasts to use and which logic to apply to your fanfic, most fanfic writers being really dumb and constantly trying to apply 5-9 year old toddler logic to a cartoon show where the characters are 20+. Most people who write fanfics have never read a celtic myth, greek legend, arthurian legend in their lives or ever seen foreign cartoons like The Moomins.
None of the fanfics I've read tried copying the adult philosophy of The Last Unicorn which only concerns adults. Instead fanfics kept trying to write completely unrelated crossover stories just like the video games around MLP or tried to "be in the spirit of the show" by copying a really dumb toddler show and showing off the writer's lack of intelligence, standards and experience.

When Faust answered how do ponies reproduce she wasn't being obtuse and ignorant about the world design, she simply had enough of retards trying to infantilize the reader like how jews do and was being honest about good old mammalian reproduction unlike americanisms where oh no don't teach the children where babies come from, don't teach them sex, but teach them violence, drugs and ironically having the mentality of a pajeet and arabian, just like a jew. You first need to learn how to write adhering to some writing guidelines before using a good setting.

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Quick at-a-glance reviews of the shorter fics rattling around in the sinbin.

>A Sparkle of Truth, by AverytheNova
>/story/585258/a-sparkle-of-truth
Self-insert memories-retained rebirth isekai in which the writer becomes Nova Star, Twilight Sparkle's cooler and more talented twin sister. Our protagonist invents the ballpoint pen at age 9 and gets into the CSGU by giving Celestia NMM flashbacks. I sometimes wish I was shameless enough to write something this self-indulgent. There's not much notable about it besides the funny typos. Choice quote:
>Yesterday, Shining TRIED to teach Twilight how to play Orgs and Oblietts, damn it, Shining, you Nerd.

>Everlife, by Uzuluri
>/story/528809/everlife
What if Twilight's first meeting with her soon-to-be best friends was in the afterlife? Neat premise, solidly-written, starring that ultra-rare pre-friendship asshole Twilight who we'll get to see develop in real time. Just the first chapter, yet, but it's very promising. The writer claims to have been working on this since 2019, so take note: it's never too late for (you)r deadfic.

>Sonnenbrand, by Feynna
>/story/585440/sonnenbrand
It isn't promising for any isekai to spend the first thousand words insisting that it isn't like other isekais. Our protagonist's third spin on the wheel of Samsara puts him in the branding-iron horseshoes of Daybreaker, who lives a miserable life in servitude to some IDW comic-inspired Discord analogue that I lack the context for. Not incompetently written, but it's very rambling and maudlin, and I think more than a few of the writer's own identity quibbles and idiosyncrasies leak into the work. Choice quote:
>Celestia seemed to have had a pretty weak estrous cycle in our former life, so it was easy to ignore that time of the year.

>Sunny, by dashie04
>/story/585428/sunny
A writing-as-therapy poem about the writer reflecting on her younger, pre-transition self, opposed by the latter wondering about their future self. It's not very pony at all, but I suppose it was never meant to be. Very repetitious and lacking in artistic flair. It was clearly difficult for the writer to meet Fimfic's word count minimum. If you're not in the target audience, there's nothing to see here.

>A Double Date at Dusk, by Corah Il Cappo
>/story/585365/1/a-double-date-at-dusk/
Trixie is dating Prince Bluebood, and it only gets gayer from there. A well-written, comfy, shippy SoL that I can't find much obvious fault in, except maybe that shoving four main characters in leaves some of them feeling a mite under-served. It's a fun and easy read. The moral of the story is that, when in pursuit of a life-sized griffon plush, there is no such thing as a crime.

>>42850240
This is neat. Shitpost summaries to inform the thread.

>>42850240
good post

>>42850240
>>42850248
>>42850246
The post is shit and doesn't explain much about the fanfics.

>>42850263
It informs enough without going into specifics.
Assuming anon isn't just lying about the basics, it's like reading a shitpost blurb and it's all someone needs.

>>42850263
Not every post needs to generate a discussion. I've been struggling to decide what to read lately and it was enough to convince me to give that Everlife one a try.

>>42850240
>it's never too late for (you)r deadfic.
It is when it never even began.

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>>42850240
>If you're not in the target audience, there's nothing to see here.
Dunno, I thought this was pretty funny.

>>42850240
I swear the daybreaker HiEs are just trying to follow a trend because the popular fics of the year were daybreaker hies

>>42850290
Wouldn't it be less 'human in Equestria' and more 'human inside equine' in this case?

>>42849973
If it's not in the featured box I believe so?

>>42849131
Wait, it's this guy. I last saw him some decade ago, but I always found his changeling justice warrior autism a bit annoying.

>>42850292
That's what the other fics are too. People love following trends.

>>42850281
Tbdesu, most troonfics are unintentional cringe comedies. The more the author tries to make it serious, the more cringe and comedic they are.

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Fics for this feel?

>>42850481
I'm Sorry, Sis.

Vivec in Equestria

>>42850383
>he's a changeling justice warrior but won't address changeling education problems
Wow.

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>a two bit whore
This is going to be a fun club

>>42850563
No.

>>42850563
36 Lessons of Vivec but it's Celestia's past written like an MK schizobabble text.

>>42850277
If it never began then it never had the chance to be dead in the first place. It's never too late to begin writing it

speaking of this sorta shit >>42848782
i saw an idea in another thread for an anon or oc thats the rapebaby of chrysalis and shining armour. fics for that?

>>42850780
Tons. All of them unfinished, most of them raised by Twilight. Very few of them good.

The holy trinity of edge: Luna miscarries on the moon, Chrysalis beats her mentally disabled daughter to death in a fit of inbred rage, and Twilight raises her brother's rape baby.

>>42850784
Which are the good ones?

>>42850817
Plot Twist: It's the three continuous reincarnations of Anon.

>>42850822
That's the real twist.
None of them.

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>>42850817
>I was beaten to death by mom
>My mom raped my dad
>I died a newborn
The suffering siblings

>>42850640
Sounds wild.

I don't have the budget for drugs like that, so I'll leave it up to someone else.

>>42850829
>Celestia is just manipulating events so he won't get into Equestria (he knows what he did) and finally just gives up

>>42850829
>Her daughter wasn't even mentally disabled from the inbreeding
>It's just Anon being typical Anon

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>>42850817
What about Celestia? Nightmare Moon wins, banishes Celestia to the sun, but has to watch as her newborn is vaporized millimeter by millimeter as she pushes him out.

>>42850883
Celestia's tragedy is that she's been firing blanks since she plowed through horse puberty.

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>>42850883

>>42850886
It's surprising how much Infertile Celestia is a thing.

>>42850817
which fic is the third one?

>>42850916
I mean only the middle one is an actual fic

>>42850894
there seem to be 4 camps
>celly is a virgin
>celly is a secret giga slut
>celly is infertile
>celly isn't actively pursuing love/family because x

>>42850927
>>celly is a secret giga slut
>>celly is infertile
These two aren't necessarily incompatible

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>>42850927
>celly is a virgin
And
>celly isn't actively pursuing love/family because x
Go together a lot. With X usually being some combination of not having found “the one” and also not wanting to get that close to someone that she knows she will outlive. The no nose knows (went down the shitter don’t read) is an example of this iirc.

>>42850939
>went down the shitter
Oh please, like it was ever above the shitter.

>>42850939
Pic's perfect for my book club post. Thanks.

>>42850943
I’m not getting into a shit flinging competition with someone who’s just going to use language games to prevent their position from being falsified.

>>42850954
I gave it a chance man, I did, but the central premise and implied conflict (some rando accidentally invokes an ancient law that forces him to marry Celestia) was resolved not only super quick, it was barely a conflict to begin with.

In general there was barely any conflict, and not in a way that was particularly interesting. He resolves things with his parents almost immediately, he resolves things with the marriage almost immediately. Nothing feels like it actually happens, and then on top of everything else there's this weird feeling I couldn't shake of the author being a self insert. Maybe it was him being a wannabe writer.

If we take the comics and that one thing lauren said as canon or semi-canon Celestia probably had a few flings as a teen then fell in love with other world Sombra and just never felt the need to pursue love again after that.

>>42850925
ah. i see the first one referenced enough that just i figured there was an actual fic that it originated from. on the other hand, i don't think i've seen the third one mentioned before in any context so that's the one i was most curious about.

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>>42850976
What was so good about this fucker that she just swore off relationships forever?

>>42850927
I'm camp
>celly is an infertile gigaslut virgin who isn't actively pursuing love/family because of x

>>42850990
Love

>>42851003
>gigaslut virgin

>>42850990
He's the only one who, y'know, really got her.

>>42851030
She's held a lot of hooves, anon

>>42851030
Celestia is anal only.

>>42851031
Got her what?

>>42851035
This is Equestria, buddy. The ponut still counts!

Still reading The Chrysalis Gambit? I'm enjoying it more than some of the earlier ones, but it's not good enough that I'd recommend it. I just like over-powered alicorns.

>>42851037
Some flowers, I'unno.

>>42851135
That was nice of him.

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>>42849844
do anons need more hints?

>>42851178
I just don't particularly care. Sorry, man.

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>>42850658
I've been playing the pony mod (webm related) and I've been tempted to write one where Sunset goes into the mirror and finds herself at the entrance to the mountain.

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>>42851178
Here you go,

>>42851200
I have only ever played the pony mod myself lmao
But that sounds potentially kino. Making a story out of noita sounds difficult, so my post was almost a shitpost, but having a powerful and prideful mage like Sunset get dumped into an unfamiliar world and have a kind of survival adventure fic might actually work. Nine Days Down style almost.

>>42850965
Honeymoon Phase did it better

>>42851265
Not a romance fic that one, though.

>>42851244
Didn’t know that was possible with a external tool, but that’s correct, I was just hoping more people would be able to know or guess..

>>42850990
Have you ever seen his ding-dong

>>42851315
No, but neither has Celestia.

Fics where Celestia finally gets laid?

>>42851342
There's a bunch but it's always either Anon or Twilight.

>>42851342
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/465126/a-band-of-misfit-losers-hunt-the-undead
With the human version of Torch

>>42851366
I liked that story. Even with it being Barbieshit

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>>42851342
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/400082/guilty-pleasure
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/426549/totality
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/474382/rediscovering-the-sun

>>42851396
It's secretly just Celestia angsting over all her failures in life and insecurity as a parent and person.

>>42851259
>I have only ever played the pony mod myself lmao
Based
>have a kind of survival adventure fic
Yeah I figured it would basically be "get to the end, don't die". I'd probably give Sunset some innate combat magic, but she'd have to learn to use the wands since her stuff is "stop a rampaging timberwolf" tier rather than "oneshot Temple ghosts" tier. Plus enough general knowledge of magic to infer what various enchantments do and to scry that the thing she needs to get home is at the bottom of the mountain.

>ponies have unique scents
>mare sex juice has unique flavor depending on the pony
>pronounced animalistic behaviors of a certain kind like herd mentality.
I have almost never seen these outside of HIE stories.

>>42851454
"Pegasus emit pheromones when horny"

>>42850817
tonight on top gear

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>>42851491
>HAAAAAMMOND!

>>42851454
I remember at least one one-shit where Pinkie goes around licking unicorn horns because they taste like candy

>>42851566
Does it end with one of the horns cumming magic all over her?

>>42851567
Not in the one I read.

>>42851645
A real shame, that.

>>42850398
I've run across this author before. Last time I didn't think they were unintentionally funny. But I did think they were writing for a small audience. Their work is only of interest to troons, troons-in-training, and going-to-troon-out-someday-but-refusing-to-admit-it-despite-an-unending-fascination-with-dickgirls-hermaphrodites-and-futanaris-and-an-irresistable-drive-to-discuss-their-distinctions-in-great-detail-at-every-opportunity-even-when-nobody-else-wants-to-listen-because-you-just-can't-help-yourself-the-thought-of-being-somewhere-between-a-man-and-a-woman-is-really-quite-alluring-isn't-it-isn't-it-really-don't-you-find-yourself-tempted-to-try-it-out-just-once-it's-an-experiment-it-doesn't-mean-anything-but-then-you-find-yourself-doing-it-again-after-all-it-didn't-do-any-harm-and-it-feels-so-good-but-then-you-feel-ashamed-so-you-post-about-troons-and-mock-troons-and-downvote-troons-because-you're-not-a-troon-you-can't-be-but-if-it-weren't-such-a-terrible-thing-to-be-a-troon-if-only-it-were-okay-to-be-a-troon-but-no-that's-not-how-things-are-but-if-only-they-were-but-that's-not-the-world-we-live-in-but-if-only-if-only-if-only.

>>42851675
tl;dr

>>42851705
Don't worry, you're in good company: Most people in this thread don't read, either.

>It was like trying to breathe water in a world that had forgotten how to drown.
What did it mean by this?

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>>42851746
>https://www.fimfiction.net/story/584644/1/the-phoenixs-virtues/a-discipline-in-humility
It's really not that hard to figure out in context. The fic tells you at least three times before and after.

>>42850817
Really the common thread here is Chrysalis. She's the source of all our problems.

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Fics in which fate/destiny are a major element of the story?

>>42852313
___

>>42852313
Besides the Will of Evil.

>>42852313
My fic, once it's done.

>>42852380
Fate, not faith, silly.

>>42850832
i desire to read these fics, do you know any of them by name? alternatively would i just need to add dark or oc to my tag search?

>>42850832
Actually the good ones are where the rapebaby is not an oc but Ocellus instead.

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>>42852686
This is what groups are for, there's an obvious one in https://www.fimfiction.net/groups?q=chrysalis&nsfw=all&joined=all&order=members

>>42852686
this is the closest thing i know of
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/314882/my-fluttering-heart

>>42852686
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/28718/the-foal-in-the-basket

>>42852780
>Twilight's panicking because of the sociopolitical implications
>and not over the fact that her brother was raped

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>>42852823
Lmao this is fucking garbage

>>42852823
Shining getting raped is old hat by now.

>>42852871
It was ONE time!

>>42852840
kek

>>42852840
>Me, when my brother's rape baby bites my nipple out of nowhere and begins to suck: "Well this is a minor inconvenience"

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>>42852840
this is one of those things that sort of would make sense in a world with healing magic but is also just fucking hilarious.

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>>42852937
I didn't realize this was set in the same universe as the Chrysalis story!

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>>42852948
>She was hopelessly inbred

>>42852957
Appropriate use of Trixie

>when you have to breastfeed your brother's rape baby but everypony just assumes it's your hopelessly inbred daughter and tries to convince you not to beat her to death in a fit of inbred rage

>>42852937
>The lactation spell is a simple spell
>little unicorn foals running around pranking mares by making them lactate
That would be pretty funny haha
Also why the fuck did they send the baby to Twilight and not Shining?

>>42853018
Because he's the rape victim?

>>42853021
And? The person sending the baby around is the Raper, so why not send it back to the victim? Why would she send it to a random 3rd party

>>42853018
Shining Armor finds out and tries to kill the baby in the fic so she's not unjustified about sending it to Twilight "Controlled Lactation" Sparkle.

>>42853035
what the kek, fair enuf i guess

>>42853035
>not fucking it instead

>>42853062
Okay Rarity, calm down.

>>42852745
>>42852750
>>42852780
thanks lads

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>>42850398

>>42853294
>you want to become a girl, don't you, squidward

>>42853294
>hand
Even worse than a troon self-therapy fic.

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woah, this story looks f###ing epic...

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https://www.fimfiction.net/story/584659/love-and-relative-dimensions-in-spacetime

Finally finished and posted it in full. Can't believe I wrote a fucking 110k doctor who crossover where he fucks a horse.

>>42853339
Not the worst thing he's fucked.

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>>42853345
One could do worse than Derpy Hooves, true. Far worse.

>>42853306
If I told you it's a crossover, could you guess who the man is?

Gonna start using "hopelessly inbred" as an insult now.

>>42853352
I could try and make a guess based off of the screenshot alone, but I have a feeling it's no use!

>>42853352
steven universe?

>>42853355
Fics for the feel of being always on the verge of death but repeatedly baffling Harmonydom by continuing to live?

>>42853363
see >>42848739

>>42853350
I like how it's taken out of context, but in context it's somehow still awful.

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>>42853352
The Frickin' Joker?

>>42853339
At least the horse isn't hopelessly inbred.

>>42853352
Voldemort?

So who is hopefully inbred?

>>42853395
Correct!
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/495664/78/the-accidental-invasion/chapter-78-veela

>>42853398
"Voldemort is evil because he has gender dysphoria" is a fucking take.

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>>42853398
>200,000+ words
>cancelled

>>42853339
Nominating it for the next, next club.

>>42853423
I don't think there's much interest in a pre-Capaldi doctor who crossover.

>>42853426
Is there any interest in post-Capaldi Doctor stuff?

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>>42853436
I mean maybe if Doctor Whooves was a mare...

>>42853426
I'm not a committed Doctor Who watcher, but I somehow had it in my head that Tennant was and continues to be the most well-known and iconic of all the post-revival Doctors. I'd be surprised if the majority of the pony audience don't automatically picture him when they're asked to think about who Whooves is based on.

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>>42853472
I made him more Smith in this, mostly because I like Smith's hyperactive manchild energy, the villain in this was from his run, and between the two I feel like he'd be way more likely to bang Derpy.

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>>42853332
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/585477/monsters-can-be-redeemed-right
This is actually even more hilariously stupid than I ever could have hoped. Very obviously written by a child, for starters (which makes me raise an eyebrow at the description saying it'll have a bunch of sex scenes later), and it's an Undertale crossover if the cover didn't already give it away. Point of view switches between 3rd person and various characters at multiple points throughout the chapter, abrupt scene transitions aplenty, and the overall narration style is
>This happened, then suddenly that happened... it was pretty bad... then even that happened... and I'm sure you can figure out the rest
Some variation or another of the phrase "you can figure out the rest" is used like 4 or 5 times in quick succession in the opening. It starts by glazing over some dumb Undertale AU backstory where far too many paragraphs are used to glaze over what could just be summed up as "sans kept dying over and over in a time loop until he killed everyone to maximize his aura and beat the enemy with the dao of Tragic Backstory Murderhobo, wiping the young master and his entire species from the earth" because it's not like the author ever went into more detail than that anyways, just "yeah i tried to kill they/them with undyne but you can guess how that went, then i tried with toriel but you can figure out the rest, then 20,000 resets later I..."
Then he changes his name to the monster word for blood because he's emo and wakes up in equestria after checking his diegetic health bar and stats page (referenced frequently).

You'd think things would calm down once the fandom-specific Undertale autism is left behind, but it actually gets even worse as the equines take center stage. There's some sort of rape orphanage tragic backstory to Lyra that is never elaborated upon yet is simultaneously brought up every single time she's mentioned, introduced with the sentence "What happened at the orphanage stayed at the orphanage" like it's fucking Vegas. She's obsessed with humans because it's a distraction from "the orphanage", and if she smiles then Bon Bon is relieved she's found a moment of happiness despite "the orphanage".

Oh, and they're plotting to kill Princess Celestia. Because of the orphanage. Since Celestia supposedly personally sent Lyra there. I guess that means that it's not merely "an orphanage where something bad happened", but rather a well-known, dedicated rape orphanage, such that Celestia sending her there was deliberately sentencing her to I'm-not-saying-she-was-raped-but-that's-clearly-what-I'm-implying.

>as I typed this another chapter was posted where sans joins their polycule after having a creepypasta nightmare
>"Yeah I think it is... Love... Not level of violence but actual love..."
Please don't resuscitate me, I must be in comedy heaven. That other edgyboy isekai RPGfic I was reading ironically will have to wait, because it's officially been outclassed.

>>42853489
>Princess Celestia's Dedicated Rape Orphanage For Hopelessly Inbred Unicorns

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>>42853489
I've been considering subsidizing people who bother doing actual reviews on obvious shitfics. Thanks for the giggle, anon.

>>42853396
(you), celestia and luna's magical lesbian incest colt

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>>42853445
One of Colgate's old fandom names is Ramona. Because of her cutie mark.

>>42853522
There's no hope for Anon, you know this.

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>>42853489
Lmao

>>42853558
>tw: no futa
Oh, thank God he clarified. I would've ended up in a bad way if I had to read a fic without marecock.

>>42853574
Yeah, the DRO is a real rough place to grow up but thank got it's not the DFRO in Baltimare.

>>42853472
Tennant is by far the most famous and also a top 3 doctor but what people don't tell you is that Capaldi is also on the podium. Shame about almost everything after him so far, even if there were some good moments here and there.
>>42853445
Funnily enough, the Doctor is a girl again right now. And will remain so for however long it takes for them to find a new place to air the series. RTD2 is the worst thing that happened to modern Who.

>>42853558
>muh trigger warnings
What do pussies that “need” these do when they read something that doesn’t have one of these and they read something that sets them off? Do they still throw a tantrum and post a rant to tumblr like back in the old days? Do they piss and shit their pants and cry in some dicksword server? Take their meds and an hero?

>>42853610
The hip and modern response to having your traumas triggered is to write a pithy Bluesky post about how inconsiderate people can be. It's basically the same thing you'd do on Tumblr, but in shorter form and with a tighter circle of friends around to massage your feelings back to good health.

>>42853436
When Jodie was announced, I enjoyed joking that I'd rather read Doctor Whooves fan fics. Now I'm here.

I think War Between The Land And The Sea airs this weekend?

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>>42853606
Yeah I don't think Billie Piper has the ham to carry the Who, and that whole season was just yet another writer not thinking through the consequences of their resolutions, what a coincidence!

>>42853610
I think they mostly just feel really really bad and might have a panic attack or something. Much as I don't like the mollycoddling nature of some internet spaces, people with legitimate trauma do have reactions to stuff. "Triggers" used to be an actual concept in the field of psychology before it was coopted by larping kids throwing it around for anything that bothers them.

>>42853617
Can we get a Moffat 2? At least his bullshit is entertaining.

>>42853617
Enjoy your Wilderness 2.0 Doctor.

There was almost nothing of value after Capaldi. Out of the like 6 seasons, you could count the good episodes on one hand.

>>42853623
True. At least when he fucked up, he fucked up something fun.

So is Time Turner/WHooves officially meant to be the Doctor who got regenerated as a pony or is that just a joke?

>>42853634
The show and side material leaned into it (3D glasses, pairing him with Rose) but they can't canonically say it outright obviously. That said he (or an alt universe version of him?) literally has a TARDIS In the manga.

>>42853614
>Jewsky
Worst Internet echo chamber hug box I have ever seen.
>>42853619
That’s their own responsibility not some stranger on the internet. That kind of mentality is crabs in the bucket nihilism. Ripping down the great and those who create to cater to the wants of who evade responsibility for their own well being and demand that others bear the burden of emotionally stabilizing them. That mentality also denies these people agency and is insulting to their dignity.

>>42853656
>That mentality also denies these people agency and is insulting to their dignity
I don't think writing "this story has rape in it" before a story with rape in it is insulting to anyone, actually.

>>42853656
I think that's an unsympathetic view of it, anon. I agree that 'trigger warning' culture got out of hand in fandom spaces, but we co-habit with a lot of people who've got genuine baggage. I don't think it's either unreasonable or patronising to provide at least a few tags to let people know what to expect.

It's actually insulting to human intelligence and art as a concept to put any kind off tag on your fic. Your readers should experience your creative work without a single bit of preemptive information. To label anything as comedy or drama or horror is an affront to the dignity of the human species, patronizing your fellow people who might now already know what genre your story is instead of experiencing it as pure unfiltered creation.

>>42853694
Flashbanging you with my wholesome slice of fic that turns into an incest rapebaby fic two chapters in.

>>42853656
The problem is with the people who think being made to feel uncomfortable by media that intends to make you feel uncomfortable is the same as a rape victim's trauma, not with people putting content labels on their work.

>>42853703
I played Horses today, nothing anyone ITT can write will bother my spirit.

>>42853712
We all play horses, this is the horseplay board.

>>42853352
David Silver.

Stories should not have descriptions, titles, or words. They should entirely be done through interpretative charade. If you cannot convey the concept of hopeless amounts of inbreeding through dance and raw emotion, you won't be able to write well anyway.

>>42853712
I would have never found out about that game without you and I just want to thank you for it. Absolute kino.

>>42854189
I see we've already decided on the theme for next year's collab.

>>42854350
Inbreeding?

>>42854369
No, rape babies.

>>42854395
We call those bat ponies.

>>42854395
I do not wish to rape babies

Oh right there was another one where EqG Fluttershy got raped and was having a rape baby. She gets into a relationship with Sunset and recovers and then has a car crash and miscarries the rapebaby, driving her crazy because she had wanted her life to revolve around it.

>>42854402
Guess you can never post in a Flurry Heart thread then.

>>42854402
What's wrong with you?

>>42852313
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/5035/not-my-destiny
Sequel's a deadfic, but it's one of those "far flung future" sequels so not a direct continuation.

>>42852780
>tfw you read the whole story and it's in your favorites (due to the Favorites/Tracking merge) and you have absolutely no recollection of it

>>42853606
>to find a new place to air the series
Pretty sure it's getting canned after this. They already tried bringing back Tennant to save the show and that didn't work. Piper's the death rattle. Unless they hilariously bring Moffat back. I always did like the more fantasy tone of 11 over the scifi of 10, even if Moffat was horrendous with the story arcs.

I feel like I just read the wrong club fic.

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>>42853489
Wow, this kid is just whipping out chapters every couple of hours... and it really shows in the writing...
The third is another multi-month timeskip, this time to the start of the show. Of note: every mare is wet for dust and the author is totally going the harem route. Also of note: the author's username is "Dust Spike" and he accidentally left a "Y/n" in there referring to dust according to an earlier comment (maybe it's even still there and I missed it while reading). This is very clearly his badass power fantasy self insert, which explains why he's written nothing like sans. There are too many stand-out moments for me to weave together into a properly written post so I'll just list them in no particular order:
>sans is the seventh element, justice, despite being a murderhobo that's genocidally racist towards humans and goes berserk even hearing the word
>has inexplicable meta knowledge of the show, probably from the author forgetting this is meant to be sans undertale and not the author
>lyra has a rape flashback-triggered berserk mode that makes her more powerful than chara, and also is the eighth element
>every character has a tragic backstory now, usually involving being an orphan, usually because celestia killed their parents (maybe she has an orphan fetish?)
>there are over 25,000 cannibal hydras in whitetail woods, as a result of all of the small animals going extinct. because of celestia. (don't even try to make sense of that)
>sans' dead brother papyrus that he killed is still alive as a ghost haunting his trumpet. wasn't brought up at all until it was randomly used for a comedy scene
>despite being the short one in undertale, sans is a tall chad here
>everypony in ponyville still wants the gala tickets despite fleeing canterlot to avoid maniacal orphan-rape-enthusiast tyrantlestia

I'll probably end my commentary here since it's drifting towards that generic shonentard self-insert battle harem isekai complete with RPG mechanics type of story, but what a batshit insane read. I always assume these dogshit fics are written by minors... but the last time I assumed that, I clicked a patreon link on an author's profile only to see an update video by a balding middle-aged man, so who the fuck knows anymore.

I don't have anything else to add, so I'll leave you with a borderline incomprehensible passage from chapter 3.

>>42854326
You weren't supposed to get off to it, anon.

Seriously considering following in Kkat's hoofsteps and ||writing Hazbin fanfics||.

>>42854853
Post so bad it feels like bait

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Anybody know a good fic of a human getting raised by celestia?

Luna using her dream abilities to talk to her unborn baby :)

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>>42854919

>>42853634
Pretty sure he's the pony equivalent of the Doctor, not a regeneration of the human one.
>>42854919
You come into OUR house and ask for HiE??!

>>42855020
Who would know good HiE better than people who don't like it to begin with?

>>42853656
>>42853667
>That mentality also denies these people agency and is insulting to their dignity.
The best way to do it is to write it in a way that doesn't insult the reader's intelligence. If you unironically use 'trigger warning', you're a massive faggot who shouldn't be writing in the first place. Use a generic 'this fic includes graphic content in X chapter' or some shit like you know your readers are adults who are capable of thinking for themselves in that they don't immediately drop the best thing they may read in months just because of """trauma"""

>>42854776
You weren't?

>>42854945
You can do that normally, stupid.

>>42855234
The dick chopping scene didn't clue you in?

>>42855109
>drop the best thing they may read in months
I somehow doubt that.

>>42855020
I didn't say not to include AiE stuff, hell anon being raised by Tia sounds great.

>>42855425
You could just make it a normal pony instead of Alex, who is into cryptocurrency and wants to suckle Celestia.

>>42853712
>>42854326
It's just a very mediocre game. All of the discourse is about the dumb censorship of it, and that's why I wanted to like it, too, but after actually playing it (something 95%+ of people talking about it online didn't seem to do), I can say it's both trying too hard and being too shallow to justify that. I'm not sure I'll bother with finishing it.

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>>42855480
I liked Verho: Curse of Faces.

>>42855431
If a it's a human into get rich quick schemes and gambling then the better parents would clearly be Flim and Flam.

>>42855498
We're blazing new trails with the MGS genre. Only /fimfic/ could pull that one off.

>>42855512
>blazing new trails
>anon somehow unaware of the omegaverse

>>42855528
>>anon somehow unaware of the omegaverse
That's a blessing.

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I just looked up what omegaverse is and I hate it.

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>>42855782
Omega Rainbow Dash x Alpha Fluttershy
Alpha Twilight x Omega Starlight

>>42855782
Women's rights? More like women's wrongs.

>>42855782
it's just the woman equivalent of futafags
I respect both crowds for being degenerates but also look down upon both for having shit taste

>>42855879
I don't respect either because they're in denial.

>>42855782
Subservient omega hands typed this

This has been a fun thread.

>>42855849
>Omega Rainbow Dash x Alpha Fluttershy
This is the kino dynamic for this pair

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Mentioning Yaerfaerda, sixth fic of Easthorse, again because Skirts has replaced the obligatory once-a-chapter gay scene with Ebon and Eagle Eye with mentions of farts, feces, or butts at least once every cut to whatever different characters are doing. What the fuck was he thinking? This is the weakest fic by far. Does it get worse?

>>42856359
No, it hasn't.

>>42856506
I only remember the ending being satisfying at the time.

>>42856506
Maybe they're into it.

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>>42855782
That's because you're an omega. Don't worry, you'll come to appreciate your proper place soon. Prepare your anus.

>>42853489
>Dust is then shot but it does not affect him, however, what does affect him is the amount of knife wounds he has
The first sentence and I'm already laughing, it's like something straight out of jakkid

>>42853694
The exception to this is fetish tags which are actually useful for finding stories through the searchbar

>>42856506
Yaerfaerda is the one before RD crosses the giant desert and ocean, right? They're still on that elk's airship? Yeah it gets better after the reset, a lot better. The crew on the airship honestly overstays their welcome by the end of it. Utaan is one of my favourite fics of the series.

>>42857067
Actually wanting people to find your art is morally bankrupt. Art should be cast lineless into the void only to be found by a scant few through serendipity. Only if the creation process exists purely for art's sake with no ulterior motives or needs is your work untainted.

>>42857083
I do not care what the artist wants. I, the reader, have a moral right to find pornography catering to my fetishes. The moral bankruptcy or otherwise of the writer is simply not my problem

>>42857083
This is about fanfiction, not personal websites.

Where is the club?
It's over...

>>42857166
Come on, I'm not even 5 minutes late yet.

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Exploring towers and Castles in,
>/FSBC/

Not much time until the club and two fics to cower! I'll start by saying that, "objectively", they are both at least pretty good, though I suspect I might have an opinion opposite of the majority. The post will also be a little all over the place. Sorry!

[Fallen Star]
I've never read any Connans, but this is pretty much exactly how I imagine it based on its imprint in culture. The fic's writing is solid technically (especially since the 'action romp' genre gives the author some leeway), and it knows what it wants to do—it even does that thing pretty well! However, it's also not very good on a less technical level. Mediocre, I'd say. A bunch of telling-heavy narration, a few bits of odd scene pacing, and an ending that falls a little flat. Maybe Succession is making it look worse than it is.
But don't take that to mean this story is bad! If you want a "Celestia the Barbarian" fic, you probably can't do much better than this!
Yes, of course I need to mention that the fic (and this "Celestia") is stunningly horny. Like, we unironically get a sex scene or at least a lead-up to one every 3k words or so for the first 2/3 of the fic. Again, not exactly my cup of tea in ponyfics, but I'll defend it on the grounds of being very cohesive with the 'genre'. Same with the very well-defined worldbuilding.

[Succession]
Now this! Oh yeah, this is good. From almost the very beginning to the end, it has this impressive quality of being legitimately—wait for it—well written! I'd go as far as saying this is one of the better stories we've read in a while. The gradual reveals, playing with certain expectations that the reader will build up about the world, and the precious scenes where we (alongside Morning Glory) learn more about Twilight—it all fits so nicely and so intentionally! And it's really good on the technical side as well; +1 for using my beloved en-dashes. I have no criticisms there. Pretty presentation of ponyfics matters! And in fact, it had not one but two words I didn't know, which is neat, too!

Much like Fallen Star, it's a story that maintains a clear vision of its intended atmosphere, but the big picture stuff raises it higher even in that aspect. Of course, I'll have to admit that I have some bias. I greatly enjoy reading good fics with the themes and mood this story went for, and between the tree and the deer, it flashed me with nostalgia, too.
Before I run out of space: It's such a good AU ponyfic! We're thrown into this far-future AU with its problems that make the world a bit darker in some ways, yes, but it still feels very pony, and we learn why things are the way they are. I'm not a fan of profanity in stories so that one "Fuck it" took me out of it a little bit. Some people would probably complain about the less-pony implications, but they didn't feel out of place.

Next week, School Daze. The first half of it, to be specific
https://www.fimfiction.net/story/2432/school-daze

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>>42857171
>[Fallen Star]
To start with the obvious:

The story is an homage to Conan and Robert E. Howard, an exercise in mixing his universe with MLP. As the title suggests, the main inspiration is "The Tower of the Elephant":
>Barbarian hears about some evil wizard's tower in the slums, gets a guy to lead her there, breaks in alone, survives a bunch of traps and monsters, finds a magic creature the wizard's been keeping prisoner, learns the wizard fucked them over hard, then the prisoner kills the wizard and the whole tower disappears.
Even if there are other inspirations and differences throughout.
The Howardian themes are all here: civilization is corrupt and decadent, Celestia is honest with practical wisdom, magic and sorcery are fucking scary and perverted. That last one doesn't mix perfectly with MLP IMO

It's very horny. Way more horny than any Conan story I remember (I do need to reread them). Every chapter except the prologue has sex or heavy allusions to sex or how hot or horny (not on the forehead) Celestia is. It didn't bother me exactly, but it felt like a bit much even accounting for the setting and influences. Also shows this leans hard into AU since we all know Celestia is the epitome of pure virginity.

The prose is also Howard-inspired: pulpy, evocative, keeps things moving. The author obviously isn't Howard, that's too much to ask from a fanfiction site, but the style is well-adapted and does its job. Some passages get too heavy and aren't smooth to read, but he can also evoke good imagery.
IMO this passage shows both strengths and weaknesses:
>The streets were narrower, and tall, ugly slum buildings constructed of old and rotting wood, patched together by their impoverished inhabitants, loomed either side of her. It was difficult to find where one home ended and the other began, for entire rooms had been built atop the other, with each struggling to rise above its neighbour. Seeing them put her in mind of drunk ponies leaning against one another for support, swaying and buckling as their failing strength failed to hold up their own weight.
The simile is great:you can instantly picture it. But there's also filler that weighs it down.

I have issues with the pacing too. The start before the tower takes its time, but the tower and Vizier confrontation feel rushed. Not much actually happens inside the tower in terms of confrontation, and more lines are dedicated to Celestia being horny than to other elements. The author commented that he rushed the ending, and it shows, that creates an uneven feeling where you wonder why earlier scenes got more attention than what comes later.

Glad I read it. Quick and fun, would recommend. The exercise of mixing both universes was a success overall. But I wouldn't call it great, and from some passages, I believe the author was capable of more.

I didn't read the second fic.

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>>42857171
>Fallen Star
My main complaint against this fic is actually against myself for not seeing Luna coming. The 'fallen star', a chapter titled 'The Dream'... I may well be more retarded than I thought. As for the fic, proper: I'm left with a broadly positive impression, with a few asterisks.

The fact that it's technically proficient is one that I hold in high esteem in the fic space, given the depth of the FiMfic quality floor. It's genuinely refreshing to be able to take such things as 'good prose' and 'competent sentence structure' for granted, and the effort hasn't gone unnoticed. It's a rich read — at times too much so, as noted in the above post, but it does avoid turning puple. Since most of my upcoming points will be about things I'm not so positive about, I should clarify again that I did, in fact, enjoy this fic.

As said, it gets far more mileage out of the 'Sex' tag than I think any of us were expecting. Opening on a tryst with a prostitute in a slummy inn is perfectly appropriate for setting up the tone of the world we're in; no issues there. Then, she fucks a certain mugger who stumbled in from the writer's other, better-known fic series, then it turns out that combat sex is actually integral to Cimmarean culture, then there's the lavishly-described sex statuette... it's excessive, and even a little contrived. (It ended up putting me on high horny alert through the Succession reading. I had to double back and re-check the tags when that one first mentioned what Twilight was wearing.)

Celestia, of all ponies, feels like a poor fit as a Conan expy, unless the writer was only selecting for the largest, most Amazonian mare possible. This is true solely from a character stance (try to picture canon Celly in this character's horseshoes) but it shifts from just being incongruent to outright glaring when it has to be explained why she can't fly or use magic. The meta reason, obviously, is because it'd break the Conan connection if our protagonist had what that setting would call supernatural powers. The in-fic reason is that she simply wasn't inclined to bother with honing any of that prancing la-la nonsense. There's work put in to bridge this with fluff about Cimmarean culture, but I don't buy her choosing to be wilfully ignorant of her exceedingly obvious nature.

Everything between the intro and the approach to the tower was solid, and everything including and following the dream sequence was also solid. Between that, it is, indeed, terribly rushed. I had it in mind that the meat of these sorts of stories is meant to be the adventure itself; the parts where the hero overcomes adversity with their unique strengths. I suppose Celestia's unique strength is being able to plow directly through all of the fun parts as though they aren't there, not unlike the fic itself. I would've really liked to see these parts described with the same love the first half got.

Succession next, gimme a sec.

>>42857227
>Succession
Unreserved agreement that it's a high-quality fic. Lovely prose, plenty of variety between scenes; remarkably well-paced. How pleasant it is, for once, to be given everything I need for a nice mental image or two. I think what's really remarkable is how well it met the contest challenge of writing something bearable about an alicorn OC. Quite liked the exploration of the otherwise-standard idea of an alicorn's innate magic being in a league of its own compared to 'mundane' pony tribal magic.

I'm fascinated by the idea this fic poses of a 'regressive' Equestria, that's somehow lapsed into a second post-mythic era. Lots left unsaid, both deliberately and for want, about Twilight's reign up to this point and why she allowed Equestria to head down this path, although it's implied that she's more out of her depth as a solo ruler than she lets other ponies know. Her actions and attitudes track with those of an inveterate and world-weary ruler who's seen too much, but not at all with the personality that got her made into a princess in the first place.

Maybe she lost the spark after the Manes carked it. On that, I had this terrifying notion that the statues of her old friends out behind the castle were actually the ponies themselves, which Twilight had turned to stone to keep them from dying; maybe she lets them out for a few hours at a time, every so often? Far too dark an idea for the specific tone of this fic, now I think back on it.

Special mention to one of my personal bugbears showing up, which is Twilight's spontaneous combustion gag in FPK getting treated like some sort of ultra-powerful limit break. It's mentioned in a more tongue-in-cheek manner, here, though, so hey.

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>>42857171
>Succeession
It was fine. Well written and the only weird thing is how Twilight acts, but that's pretty much what the story is about so it's fine. I think I would've preferred to have read this one first but as it is, I was reeling from the other fic.

>The Tower
Wtf did I just read. A rated Teen fic where Celestia actually spends more than 10% of the fic with a cock inside of her. I've read clopfics with worse ratios. I had a bad feeling when she went up to the statue of a stallion in the beginning but I never could've expected all this. And no, I do not know anything about Conan
>sits on someone who stabs her
Wtf? Time to start my ass-ass ination plot
>also rides their cock in a dirty back alley
wtf is this fic
>immediately after gets stuck in a wall with her but sticking out
And now when they finally do get to a part where she should get fucked she doesn't.
>almost dies because she's a gooner who will autopath towards anything erotic
>"A warrior this stupid was useless."
>while Celestia gets railed in alleyways, Luna is a princess in a tower
Okay. I do like the idea that Celestia was drawn to Luna without knowing it though.
>>>>>>>>end of the fic
>"By Crom I need a nice cock right now." She grinned at Luna, "And I know just the place and the stallion."
fucking KEK. Come on Luna, you ever sucked a cock before? I'll show you how to do it. What's that? You're like 12? That's far too long to go without cock, double time it. We'll literally just rape the first stallion we see!
Best part by far was the dream of the village. Although I'm surprised her dream self wasn't getting railed. And I actually feared she was the way it led into seeing herself. I liked the world building though, it just needed to be about 98% less horny.
Really it should've been a clopfic where Celestia walked in on luna naked and seen her cock and wings and fell in love right there. Becoming a civilized mare who only takes her lovers cock every night and can finally live without her mind being permanently clouded by lust.
And again, somehow a Teen fic and every single stallion in it except for 1 explicitly stares at her pussy and like half of them actually fuck her and all of those cum inside. This is literally explicitly stated by the fic. The sex in this fic honestly gave me feelings closer to Pianoman than I think any other fic has. The story is far far better written and if you take out the sex it's actually good and enjoyable (although quite a bit dark out of nowhere with the Vizier) but with Celestia rewarding some random alley thug by riding his cock and then the ending being one of the funniest endings ever, I got a bit of that special Pianoman feeling of going insane.

>>42857171
>If you want a "Celestia the Barbarian" fic, you probably can't do much better than this!
Considering she never touches anyone at any point with her big ass sword and instead seems to just fight with her big ass, you can probably do a lot better than this. This is just amazonian snu snu Celestia. Not like other ancient kino princess fics like Wyrmyslan or something
>the fic (and this "Celestia") is stunningly horny
I think it's more Celestia's fault than the fics if that makes any sense. Every direct mention of sex IS Celestia. Sure it mentions brothels and pony trafficking, but every sex moan we hear in the night is Celestia.
>this impressive quality of being legitimately well written!
Yes, it was pleasant to read throughout. I did expect that though from Archonix
>and between the tree and the deer, it flashed me with nostalgia, too.
kek the deer caught me off guard. But I like that a glimpse of a deer and maybe of a griffon can add a lot to the world building so easily.
>far-future AU with its problems that make the world a bit darker in some ways, yes, but it still feels very pony, and we learn why things are the way they are. I'm not a fan of profanity in stories so that one "Fuck it" took me out of it a little bit
Agreed with all of this and yeah learning about Twilight and the past was enjoyable

>>42857175
>As the title suggests, the main inspiration is "The Tower of the Elephant":
huh
>magic and sorcery are fucking scary and perverted. That last one doesn't mix perfectly with MLP IMO
>It's very horny.
Well I agree with that alright
>but it felt like a bit much even accounting for the setting and influences.
It truly did
>I have issues with the pacing too. The start before the tower takes its time, but the tower and Vizier confrontation feel rushed. Not much actually happens inside the tower in terms of confrontation, and more lines are dedicated to Celestia being horny than to other elements.
Agreed again. Reading on my ebook gives me the funny ability to see how far through a fic I am in a percentage and it's kind of jarring sometimes. By 60% in she's just fucked random stallions and wandered around a city. We weren't even in the noble quarter yet kek
>and from some passages, I believe the author was capable of more.
Yeah, what I liked, I did really like

>>42857227
>My main complaint against this fic is actually against myself for not seeing Luna coming. The 'fallen star', a chapter titled 'The Dream'... I may well be more retarded than I thought.
fucking kek
>Then, she fucks a certain mugger who stumbled in from the writer's other, better-known fic series
Oh god, it's worse than I thought, we're just tagging in other OCs to take their turn
>then there's the lavishly-described sex statuette... it's excessive, and even a little contrived. (It ended up putting me on high horny alert through the Succession reading. I had to double back and re-check the tags when that one first mentioned what Twilight was wearing.)
kek, another victim of reading these in the wrong order. Not sure if it was just me but Monring Glory definitely has the hots for Twilight at one point. But maybe that was just the Cimmareian mind worm
>Celestia, of all ponies, feels like a poor fit as a Conan expy, unless the writer was only selecting for the largest, most Amazonian mare possible.
That really seems like what it was
>The in-fic reason is that she simply wasn't inclined to bother with honing any of that prancing la-la nonsense. There's work put in to bridge this with fluff about Cimmarean culture, but I don't buy her choosing to be wilfully ignorant of her exceedingly obvious nature.
Yeah. Surely someone who values might and combat prowess this much would want to exploit their wings, even if just to fly to further places to then land and engage in more 'honorable' combat. Or just more easily steal sheep or whatever they said they do.
>Everything between the intro and the approach to the tower was solid, and everything including and following the dream sequence was also solid. Between that, it is, indeed, terribly rushed. I had it in mind that the meat of these sorts of stories is meant to be the adventure itself; the parts where the hero overcomes adversity with their unique strengths. I suppose Celestia's unique strength is being able to plow directly through all of the fun parts as though they aren't there, not unlike the fic itself.
kek, her power is not plowing through the fun parts, it's plowing through the stallion's fun parts. But yeah I agree, the pacing could've been better or the fic longer and it would've been more enjoyable (of course assuming it doesn't maintain its ratio of Celly having cock in her)
Also you're complaints about Celestia reminded me, I do not like the description of this fic at all. It put me in the mind that her chronicler was going to be the narrator even though that wasn't the case. But when she fucked the guy in the alleyway I actually had to go double check that the fic wasn't some historian telling modern ponies at Twilight's coronation how Celestia fucked literally every stallion she ever met at one point in her life. I think it was a bad decision to have that weird little quote at the beginning of the description. And yeah I think not having it be celestia could've improved the fic

>>42857307
>huh
Yeah, it's not as horny at ALL and better written, but from the title and what happens in the story, you can see it's the Conan story he took inspiration from. I could go into details with the parallels but I don't think it's that interesting.
I do recommend the read btw, with "The Frost-Giant's Daughter" too to see some of the prose Howard can go with. "Frost Daughter" is about Conan being horny but the fic is way, way more explicit. Good way to see the difference in handling between the two too.
>>42857227
>Then, she fucks a certain mugger who stumbled in from the writer's other, better-known fic
Didn't know that. I thought it was just a parallel of "Taurus of Nemedia," a thief from "Tower of the Elephant" who also guides Conan to the Tower, but I was wondering why so much detail was put into him. I guess I know now.
I think we agree on the rest and share the same opinion.
>>42857171
>I've never read any Connans
>Con'n'ans
First, shame on you, and second, you should read some of the short stories.
Funny how we all agree on the horny part but it's THAT prevalent tbdesu.

>>42857257
>I think what's really remarkable is how well it met the contest challenge of writing something bearable about an alicorn OC
kek I didn't realize that was the contest. Morning Glory is better than Cimmareian Celly
But yeah I agree with your whole post
>I'm fascinated by the idea this fic poses of a 'regressive' Equestria, that's somehow lapsed into a second post-mythic era
I like how unexplained it is though. We see deer, and MG expects she might've seen griffons, all acting as part of 'Equestria's armed forces in some way or another and I don't think we hear about war in the present really. So Twilight has achieved some stuff for Equestria, while still maybe devolving in other ways.
>Maybe she lost the spark after the Manes carked it. On that, I had this terrifying notion that the statues of her old friends out behind the castle were actually the ponies themselves, which Twilight had turned to stone
I feel like we've seen this a bit in club fics. there was definitely one where she has statues of them that talk to her and then Equestria 500,000 or whatever she finds grey goo replicas or something kek
I'm more interested in wtf happened to Zecora though. She became the Everfree somehow and made it both more tame and more dangerous I guess. Also I don't think she would stone the princesses as well.
>which is Twilight's spontaneous combustion gag in FPK getting treated like some sort of ultra-powerful limit break. It's mentioned in a more tongue-in-cheek manner, here, though, so hey.
kek yeah that was good. The legends of her turning white hot in flames and then Twilight just keks and says 'oh yeah, I just got mad at one of my friends'

>>42857336
>Yeah, it's not as horny at ALL
Funny considering it could get away with it far more than an mlp fanfic about Celestia could
>I could go into details with the parallels but I don't think it's that interesting.
I mean it is but I think you did enough with that first breakdown that I was 'huh'ing at, so thanks for that.
>Funny how we all agree on the horny part but it's THAT prevalent tbdesu.
It really sticks out here and Celestia is all to eager to notice.

It would've been funnier if Celestia had been clamjammed by the plot at every turn, and it was only after she rescued Luna that they went on on a sex bender.

>>42857368
Yeah, with each other. That would've been kino

>>42857175
>"The Tower of the Elephant"
Oh wow, is it really this much of an adaptation? I enjoyed it as an exercise in using the themes, but if the plot is basically a ponified Conan story, it actually makes me rate the fic considerably lower.
>It's very horny.
This might be the horniest non-porn story I've read. It beats even Geralt at his 'best'.
>horny (not on the forehead) Celestia is
To be fair, it focuses on her horn a lot, too.
>we all know Celestia is the epitome of pure virginity.
Based and correct.
>the tower and Vizier confrontation feel rushed
I don't believe I said it, but yes, this is where it's at its worst. One or two scenes are described (e.g., the one where Celestia gets horny over the explicit artwork), but the entire "and then she went through the tower" is just pretty awful, as far as scenes building to the the finale go.
>The author commented that he rushed the ending
Ah, makes sense.

>>42857227
>it's technically proficient is one that I hold in high esteem in the fic space, given the depth of the FiMfic quality floor.
Kek. It is nice to not run into a typo every other sentence, I'll give the fic that.
>read — at times
The dreaded spaced em-dash! This is obscene!
>the 'Sex' tag
I'd be shocked if anyone didn't mention it in their post.
>I don't buy her choosing to be wilfully ignorant of her exceedingly obvious nature
She's not, though? She set out on her mission specifically to find out what she was. It's just that the earth pony savages had no pegasi or unicorns who could teach her how to use her innate skills, if I understood it right.

>>42857257
>contest challenge of writing something bearable about an alicorn OC
I didn't look into the contest rules. Neat.
>not at all with the personality that got her made into a princess in the first place
Except that she's well aware of it, too, and that itself is a big part of the burden she has to bear.
>Far too dark an idea for the specific tone of this fic,
Maybe. But we also have this "Zecora" and the wording that suggest that Cady killed herself, so maybe also not.

>>42857269
>It was fine.
I'll take 'fine', but I think it's a lot better than that.
>who will autopath towards anything erotic
>I've read clopfics with worse ratios.
Kek, the fimfiction [Sex] tag experience.
>fucking KEK.
I think Luna is quite a bit older (16?), but yeah, that was a wild ending. "You're free? Let's go to the brothel, girl!" But at this point I could only nod and agree that this is what the fic is.
>her cock
>
Twianon, I...

>>42857372
>She's not, though? She set out on her mission specifically to find out what she was.
I agreed with them but this is fair. But It seems like she never even tried out her other parts. Just wants to know why she has them. Although again I guess she never even saw ponies flying or using magic. She is perplexed when the whore picks up a drink
>but I think it's a lot better than that.
Sure but I was in a bad state of mind after The Tower and yes I will continue to call it 'The Tower' instead of 'Fallen Star' like all of you in reference to all the cocks
>I think Luna is quite a bit older (16?), but yeah, that was a wild ending
But I mean compared to how she treats Luna in every scene up to that I could believe Luna was like 8.
>>her cock
>>
>Twianon, I...
All mares are for Luna

>>42857372
>Oh wow, is it really this much of an adaptation?
It's not one-to-one, and I do give kudos to the author for some of the prose and imagery he came up with on his own. From my memory, nothing was directly lifted from the Conan stories in terms of description (though maybe I'm wrong), but there are so many parallels that I wouldn't be surprised if the author's idea was:
>Let's ponify Tower of the Elephant!
Again, I do recommend reading it plus "The Frost-Giant's Daughter." They're short like most Conan stories, well written, and very easy to read. Will probably reread them soon.
>I don't believe I said it, but yes, this is where it's at its worst.
Yeah, it's a shame. The author did acknowledge the rush, and I believe he tried to make light of it; for instance, the manticore description where Celestia BTFOs it by breaking the door; but it's still a problem and the lowest moment in the fic where the action and writing should shine. It's the main reason why I can't call this fic great.

Totally unrelated, but because I know we have /chag/ retards here:
>The couple were atop a bed of straw covered with rough cloth, and the stallion was almost eclipsed from view by the mare's bulk save for his twitching hindlegs that peaked from under her bare flanks. Her mighty chest heaved and her white coat was slick with glistening sweat, which ran in rivulets down the muscular contours of her body. A pair of great wings spread from her back and a long, spiralled horn almost scraped the wooden ceiling above.
That gave me old Claude flashbacks with both the rhythm and the fucking rivulets. (To be clear, the author obviously didn't use AI, I just thought it was funny).

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I updated the bookclub previously read fics list. Apologies for not updating it for over a month, I don’t read along with the bookclubs anymore and don’t come here as often as I used to since I need to spend my time on other things. I’ll try to remember to check in on this place more often.

>>42857433
>I don’t read along with the bookclubs anymore
A few of the new ones were not horribel!

>>42857307
>ancient kino princess fics like Wyrmyslan
Wyrmlysan is a better fic, but this is more of a Conan fic. Except way more horny than the actual barbarian was, apparently.
>Every direct mention of sex IS Celestia.
Only because she's the main character. Half of the interactions are initiated by stallions staring at her marehood or getting hard without her direct prompting.
>We weren't even in the noble quarter yet kek
To be fair, fucking random stallions makes up for a very large part of the fic. Cut it out and the journey would feel less poorly paced. Except for the ascent up the tower (after the sex statue and before Luna) being over in just a couple paragraphs—there's no fixing that without rewriting it.

>>42857334
>Monring Glory definitely has the hots for Twilight at one point
I started with the better fic and didn't see that, so yes, it probably is just that.
>not having it be celestia could've improved the fic
I would agree, but it's a pretty damning thing to say about a fic whose entire premise is "Celestia in Conan". Though actually, following on the fic's themes, it should be "Conan in Celestia".

>>42857336
>but from the title
I didn't realize Cimmareian is a pun on Conan's title and 'mare'. I guess it's to the fic's credit that it managed to sell the Conan thematic crossover so heavily even to a fillistine who didn't get it from the title.
>First, shame on you, and second, you should read some of the short stories.
Yes, I know, I know. It's on my RiL, and technically it's a part of Yog'Sothothery so that's another reason to do it. I'll get to it eventually. I'll claim the extra 'n' was a typo and you can't prove otherwise!

>>42857342
>I don't think she would stone the princesses as well
Unless I'm mixing the fics, I'm pretty sure she says that the Princesses and Cadance are dead, just using softer phrasing. "Gone somewhere she can't" or something.

>>42857397
>compared to how she treats Luna in every scene up to that
That's the issue, I think. Luna's "I'm almost an adult" act could be anything from 13 to 17, but Celestia definitely treats her like a kid... before inviting her to go whoring.

>>42857415
>That gave me old Claude flashbacks
Don't worry; it triggered my PTSD, too. I still shudder every time I stumble into "The night is still young" in a fic.