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dashie

>>43319670
I am saddened by the lack of mares in my life.

I''m curious, since /fit/'s sticky is horribly outdated and people there can't even give any useful info since the board's gone to shit, (yes the starting strength 5x5 shit is a meme), can any anons here give info on gaining muscle mass so I don't limp and die?
I don't have barbells or dumbbells, and only my own body, I also don't have the money to afford protein in any form (meat is expensive and so are supplements).

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>>43319686
>dyels are getting BTFO so hard by /fit/izens that they're resorting to posting on the horse pregnancy board for fitness advice

>>43319686
gorilla biscuits and pushups, maybe go for a run once a week, also one of these: https://www.tractorsupply.com/tsc/product/evolved-habitats-herdlife-sturdy-steed-candy-apple-4-lb-1023522
for minerals or something

>>43319686
Bodyweight squats and oats

>>43319686
>I don't have barbells or dumbbells
if you save gallon jugs and fill them with sand or something they can be used as ghetto weights

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>>43319543
I love my moonwife!

>>43319686
>I also don't have the money to afford protein in any form
What do you eat?

>>43319840
I'm guessing he eats like a Polish peasant from the 12th century.

>>43319543
Since we're talking stength, what would you prefer? Buff mare, or one who's slim and lanky?

>>43319893
Maybe slim and lanky.

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>>43319893
I prefer plump and soft

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>>43320148
Unf, based!

>>43320148
I see she gets inspired by Celestia.

>>43320148
I like big flanks and I cannot lie

>>43319837
Either the cup is pretty small or this Luna is very tall.

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>>43319694
wake up anon it's not 2013 anymore.
/mlp/'s lucky to have a catalog that isn't cluttered with dogshit like this.

>>43319543

>>43321108
>Pic
Boy, I'm glad I only browse /mlp/.
I havent't seen any of that, and I don't want to.

>>43321470
wawa mare is so cute

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>>43321108
The absolute state of /fit/

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>>43321899
>Anons POV

>>43321973
The best POV.

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>>43321973

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>>43321899
>>43322293
>the following morning

>>43322425
Me, but I'd be smiling.

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Muscle mare.

>>43322425
Is there a non-ded version of this one? I need celly cuddle

>>43323622
Not that Anon, but 100%. Most of these edits were made on /mlp/ a couple of years ago.

>>43319686
>I also don't have the money to afford protein in any form
Eat beans and eggs and drink milk. It's not that complicated.

>>43323622
If no one else posts it earlier, I'll take a look for it after work.

>>43323750
I figured as much
>>43324054
Much appreciated!

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>>43324241
Here it is.

>>43324468
Thanks Anon!

>>43324838
Am I seeing things, or is the neck of Dash a bit off?

>>43325090
It's the arm.

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Do mares grow a winter coat during the cold half of the year?

>>43319686
/fit/ has gender disorders, its full of poos. hacks and roid trannies.
Pullups everyday (mokeymaxx) dumbbells and barbell full body twice a week (only 1 set per exercise). You do not need more than 60kg of metal to mog every normie.
Barbell, dumbbells and plates + a pull up bar costs costs 4 months of gym membership in my retarded country. For your place it might go up to 8-12 months gym membership total price equivalent which is still cheaper than commuting to gym and paying to smell human cattle while waiting for your turn to lift.
My horrid diet consists of eggs, milk, cheese, potatoes, bread, frozen veggies and frozen discount meat. Plenty of protein here.
If you are really that poor get a pull up bar, dip bar and stick to push pull day off forever until you lift yourself out of poverty.

>>43325494
Yes, they do. And during summer it's comfortably plush and short.

>>43325494
Pretty sure they have winter clothes for a reason. That's why snowpones are special.

>>43325494
>Winter Marble
Would the rock farm even get snow? The official map is gay and lame but it puts them right between two deserts.

>>43325525
I can’t really do pull ups anon, maybe one or two but my muscles will give up after that and it’s discouraging.
>costs 4 months of gym membership in my retarded country.
>For your place it might go up to 8-12 months gym membership total price equivalent which is still cheaper than commuting to gym and paying to smell human cattle while waiting for your turn to lift.
I don’t have employment and I’m not going to go into a tangent about why the job market is raped and why I’ve given up on looking for a job despite having career charity support.
As for diet, I don’t buy my own food, I live with my parents so it’s whatever they get in groceries.
Only now after typing this do I realize that my life sucks.

>>43325702
Glacial deposition could create the terrain that is found on the Pie family rock farm while also supporting a snowy climate. Just don't ask why a glacier is running in between two deserts. Also, don't they show snow at the rock farm when the Pie and Apple family celebrate Hearth's Warming together?

Inb4 >later seasons aren't canon

>>43325715
>Inb4 >later seasons aren't canon
It's pre-S8. So it's fine.

>>43325525
>No legs

>>43325715
I feel like the rock farm is in mountains, so it gets cold enough for snow. However since it's close to deserts, the climate is still pretty arid. Think Utah, north Arizona, New Mexico.

>>43325715
>don't they show snow at the rock farm when the Pie and Apple family celebrate Hearth's Warming together?
yes

*cough*

>>43325713
Get a resistance band, you can use that to assist you with pull ups as well as for a large number of other exercises. Do some other bodyweight stuff like push ups and squats as well.
Talk to your parents about what groceries you would like or better yet go shopping with them.
Shit sucks now but I promise it will eventually get better if you don't give up and keep trying!
We believe in (you), Anon!

>>43326014
Cover your fucking mouth, you gremlin.

>>43326102
I have discovered that I have the power to sneeze and fart simultaneously.

>>43326359
>Fluttering wings in excitement
Stuff like that is cute. I love those little details.

>>43300414
Expect a small update in a few hours. It will only be three posts long, but it's long overdue already. And apologies for the wait again. As I said, stuff in the family has kept me pretty busy and getting cooked in my own room every evening and night in the past week was a pain to deal with too. It didn't leave me with much energy to write, so the result is what it is.

>>43300414
>>43326479
And here it is. Admittedly a very light update, considering that it took two and a half weeks to get to this point. I hope that things will get a little bit more productive soon though. Anyway, obligatory links and on to the text.
Main story:
https://ponepaste.org/477
https://ponepaste.org/478
https://ponepaste.org/479
https://ponepaste.org/480
https://ponepaste.org/4581
https://ponepaste.org/8319
https://ponepaste.org/10382
Side story:
https://ponepaste.org/4466
Have fun.

>>43326818
188.2

>Whilst Fine Point talks to Check Hill and examines the sources of the Earth pony, Fall Seed and you walk up to Sky Squall and the others.
>Since you made it clear to everyone that Fall Seed and the four of you share the same view on the whole scene, you do not think that Discord can use this decision of grouping up against you.
>Still, your options at the moment are certainly limited.
>Even as a team of five.
>Because right now, everything hinges on Fine Point's expertise and judgment.
>You have given the Unicorn a nudge in the right direction, and you hope that he will heed it.
>After all, if he were to discover that the scrolls are a definite fabrication, it would be easy for you to wrap the whole thing up in one go.
>However, you doubt that you, and Summer Shine for that matter, are this lucky.
>Discord knew right from the start who is living in this region, so he has certainly taken Fine Point's presence into consideration.
>In one way or the other.
>On the other end of the spectrum, it would be a massive problem for you if Fine Point were to actually fall for the deception, given that it would turn your confrontation with Discord into an uphill struggle.
>Regardless of this possibility though, you prefer to be optimistic as you talk to your four friends and observe everything from a moderate distance.
>Even as your attempts of interpreting Fine Point's various reactions during his examination remain inconclusive, you choose to believe in his acumen nevertheless.
>For he has never let you down so far.
>Today will not be different.
>It simply must not.
>And eventually, after what feels like an eternity to you, Fine Point returns the scrolls to Check Hill.
>Then the two ponies stare at each other for a few more seconds.
>Yet once again, it is hard for you to interpret Fine Point's emotions.
>You cannot tell whether his judgement will be good for you or not.
>But you will not have to wait for the results.
>Because Fine Point starts to move.
>The Unicorn walks straight up to your group.
>With, much to your surprise, a rather confused and perhaps even dumbfounded expression.
>You have never seen him like this.
>Which makes it even harder for you to evaluate the situation.
>You take a step forward to greet him.
>Then you raise your voice.
"And? What do you think of the story? Is it valid?"
>Fine Point blinks.
>"It's... complicated."
>Complicated?
>You feel the urge to ask why a simple yes or no question might be complicated to answer.
>But you are more diplomatic than that.
"It is? How so?"
>The stallion takes a breath.
>"Because... I'm honestly not sure."
>You are beginning to share Fine Point's confusion.
"Not sure? That's, uhm, unexpected."
>The stallion nods.
>"Believe me, I feel the same way."

>>43326820
>You try to dig a little deeper.
"If I may ask, where's the problem? What makes it so hard to tell whether the material is authentic or not?"
>Fine Point clears his throat.
>"The scrolls themselves are not the problem. But the context is a different matter."
>This explanation does not really help you much.
>And Fine Point understands that too.
>So he elaborates.
>"If you look at the scrolls in isolation, I'd say they're completely authentic. The material is certainly old and worn, and the texts and images do resemble the style of Unicorn scholars from the past too. From a purely technical perspective, they could be texts of old."
>But as it is implied by Fine Point's wording, there is a catch.
>A catch which he addresses right away.
>"But, and here's where it gets... strange, the sources which are mentioned in this scroll are, well, questionable."
>Finally, a hint that you can use.
"You mean the citations are bogus?"
>Fine Point shrugs.
>"I don't know. That's the problem."
>He takes a breath.
>"What I can say for sure is that I have never heard of any of them, even after years of studies and lectures. This is, in theory, possible, but... not likely."
>A pause.
>"You have to understand, Unicorn scholars and magic schools value an intellectual exchange. It is meant to spread newfound knowledge or experiences, and to have official academic discourses between different institutions or magic branches. And believe me when I say that these interactions are well documented. There are, to my knowledge, no exceptions. You can find the complete respective records in the archives."
>Another pause.
>"To put it simple, it means that everypony knows everypony to a certain degree or another within our circles, including our respective predecessors of the past. You may know a few famous examples like Starswirl or Clover, but for any reputable wielder of magic, it is not uncommon to memorise hundreds of notable names and important magic feats. That is an essential part of what we do."
>You see a bashful smile on his face.
>"And to be entirely honest, some of the more ambitious scholars also develop a... strong penchant for heightening the reputation of their work and their institutions. I think it is fair to say that these Unicorns do not see the world of magic 'merely' as a field in which they can expand their knowledge and help others. They also treat it as an intellectual competition. And, well, all schools of magic have a few of those. Even our sphere of healers."

>>43326822
>The stallion briefly turns to Check Hill before he looks at you once more.
>"These scrolls over there... they're the extreme opposite. The authors are completely unknown, and the list of the involved ponies isn't short. This is... practically impossible. One or two obscure authors I could understand. But a full group of unknown and organised researchers, with no external references to boot? No. It's an anomaly which, in my opinion, doesn't make sense."
>Check Hill, and Discord by extension, would certainly take this assessment as a compliment.
>But since you do not care about Discord's view on the matter, you try to skip to the conclusion of Fine Point's thoughts.
"So... you think they aren't trustworthy, right?"
>The stallion hesitates before he nods.
>"Considering the circumstances... yes. They're at the very least questionable."
>A pause.
>"But I cannot prove it. And without any pieces of evidence, my theories... will remain very theoretical."
>Of course.
>Fine Point has a reputation of being level-headed and analytical in his approaches.
>He will not charge ahead with any half-baked claims or assumptions.
>Which has served him well in the past.
>And it is, considering the circumstances, a wise decision in this case too.
>So it is as you have feared.
>The game will go on for a while.
>But you are one step further now.
>Because now you know that Fine Point is favouring your side.
>Even when he does not publicly say it yet.
>The only thing you have to watch out for is to make sure that Discord's "surprise" evidence will not change Fine Point's mind.
>And this is one of the points which you should discuss with the others fairly soon.
>Preferably before Discord takes his next step.
>However, you can at least mention a few implications already.
"Well, if this is accurate... then someone has, in all due likelihood, created a fake."
>A pause.
"Whether Check Hill is aware of it or not."
>Fine Point nods reluctantly.
>"This is a plausible assumption. But I can't say that I like the implications."
>Now it is you who nods.
"Neither do I, Fine."
>You pause to take a breath.
>Then you decide to add a personal touch before you go on.
>You give him a comradely pat on the back.
"I speak for the four of us when I say that we'd prefer to have a calm life here. We don't need these games. If we wanted to have more action, we'd live closer to the Royal Court. Or become a part of their Guard or something."
>You sigh.
"This pointless game has to stop. And soon."
>Fine Point does not disagree.
>The Unicorn stallion looks at Check Hill.
>"That would be for the best, yes. But we have to remain reasonable and stick to the evidence. We can't force an outcome."
>Well, you could.
>But you know what he means.
>Whatever you are about to do to beat Discord, it must convince the ponies around you.
>So it has to be done properly, at least in the eyes of the others.
>A challenge for sure.
>Yet certainly not impossible.

>>43326824
Done. Thoughts and comments are welcome as always.

>>43326826
Not much to say since it's pretty much just bridging things for the moment.

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She knows what's good for (You).

>>43327534
I'm not going to bed before 5am, there's still videos to watch and threads to scroll through.

>>43327534
Luna, if I go to bed early the sunfags win. We can't allow that, can we?

>>43327024
Yeah, I thought as much. This was planned to be posted in combination with either the last segment or the next one, as it does not bear much on its own.

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>>43326359

>>43328765
>Anon bangs Fluttershy continuously for 9 months

>>43328847
Not for the first time too.

>>43319543
Sad! Even mares don't consider you only after you buffed yourself. :(
Nothing can be easy - even in Equestria.

>>43327262
Pretty

>>43329086
Yes.
Me like.

>>43329100
>Nothing can be easy - even in Equestria.
And that's a good thing!

>>43329296
Great! Anon can't even get a mare. He hasn't pumpped himself up here why be easier there?
Well, at least in Equestrian friendzone the mares are actually your friends.

>>43329304
>He hasn't pumpped himself up here
>He's not lifting to sculpt the ideal body for his future marewife
NGMI

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Mare's bad mane day.

>>43329315
I understand that. I say the mare didn't start to get interested in him until he got pumpped. But, yeah, you can't expect they fall for you default. >Eventhough it is basically an anon trope.

>>43329296
Things in Equestria are not easier, but at least simpler. :)

Excuse me, this is the mare square, not the fit forum.

>>43329671
Would you love a mare if she were /fit/?

>>43329691
of course

>>43329691
I would love any mare.

>>43326824
>It's... complicated.
Anon did not do a good enough job, while Discord did.
>scrolls
Plural? DId Discord have access to surveillance systems or some similar thing? Faking a document is one thing, but knowing about the existence of (then finding) multiple ones which together look like a proof is a different thing entirely. And again, he only had maybe a day to gather all needed things.
>in theory, possible, but... not likely
Let's work on the not likely option. For example showing that no physical trace can be found, thus Discord lying.
>It's an anomaly which, in my opinion, doesn't make sense.
Or this was such a separate field (or one treated unworthy) that it's possibly disjunct from other fields. Thus remaining unknown except for those who are in it.
>So... you think they aren't trustworthy, right?
Why formulate it as a question? Steer the conversation! State that these are untrustworthy.
>stick to the evidence
But there is no evidence to disprove what Discord states. Only a lack of evidence to prove.

Thanks for the update!

>>43329691
Sure would. But I don't know if I could keep up with her.

>>43329304
Because it'd be less of a sedentary life in Equestria.

>>43330260
>sedentary
But you'd still have a regular residence somewhere.

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Science mare.
It was the best recent pick on the booru. The rest was mostly Aryanne pictures.

>>43330510
And a job, Anon. You don't get to be a NEET in Equestria.

>>43330613
Honestly, working in Equestria must be 100 times better than here. That doesn't sound bad at all.

>>43330510
A tent in the wilderness or town square, maybe. You'd be hard-pressed to have anything nicer than that, but you'd certainly be able to work your way up.

>>43330995
This isn't California. I don't think it's a good idea to erect a tent right on the square.

>>43331014
What about during Ponyville's Annual Backyard Camping Bonanza?

>>43329815
>Plural?
Yeah, as in a pair of scrolls. One contains the close-up of Anon's "portrait" and the other depicts a rough body sketch with some notes added to the sides. It's just those two though.
>Let's work on the not likely option. For example showing that no physical trace can be found, thus Discord lying.
Well, the thing is that this is about to change somewhat. And that's not even a spoiler since Anon and the others know that they have not erased all sites of Discord's tinkering. So that's not the best angle to tackle since it is bound to backfire sooner or later.
>Or this was such a separate field (or one treated unworthy) that it's possibly disjunct from other fields.
Even then there should be some records of their activities existing somewhere in the archives. Even when these are just amused comments written by other scholars, considering that the scrolls imply that there was a coordinated effort behind their research. If such a school really would have existed, the others would at least have wanted to use them and their teachings as "bad examples" of scientific conduct or something. A role model for what not to do in serious studies, if you will.
>Why formulate it as a question?
Anon is effectively trying to let Fine Point come to these conclusions on his own. If he presses him too much, it might come across as forced.
>But there is no evidence to disprove what Discord states. Only a lack of evidence to prove.
Exactly that is the problem. There is no evidence which proves Check Hill's claims. But on the other hand, the lack of evidence cannot falsify his claims either. As far as the others are concerned, he is not a liar in their eyes yet.

>>43331014
Any place around town, really. If not, then the wilderness it is.

>>43332366
I wouldn't even be mad.

>>43319686
>proteins
If you are really THAT poor the cheapest protein options you will find, depends on your region but for me these are textured protein onions (1g=0.5g of protein, you dont need to worry about omega-6 buildup because it's removed from the grain in the texturizing process), beef liver (great nutritional density, but can't eat everyday because of vitamin A buildup), sardine (cheap, great source of omega-3, important for your brain) and eggs (these have all the micronutrients you will need, except for a few like omega-3). Many cheaper things you already eat can be combined to make complex protein dishes like rice + beans. Research about what you eat already and what's cheap in your area, but remember that if you want to waste as little money as possible, you need to diversify rather than just go full retard on something like textured protein onions (your intestines would hate you for this).
>Exercises
You can start doing calisthenics. You only need your body weight for this but i will warn you, while it costs less time than going to the gym, it's mentally demanding and your gains are influenced by how well positioned you are.

>>43332643
Depending on your region you can also find cheaper milk, these that sell in bags and you need to consule in like 1/2 weeks

>>43332643
textured protein s o y*

>>43319686
>(yes the starting strength 5x5 shit is a meme)
But it's not?

>>43332668
I think anon is so malnourished that he loses weight when he practices any sort of serious exercises

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Slipper mare.

>>43332815
post slipperless hooves

>>43332900
How uncouth.

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>>43320474
>flank
Hard to believe flank worship was once banned like Milky back in the day.

>>43333636
And fluffy ponies.

>>43333790
>Possessive Trixie
Now that has a special charm.

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Varying degrees of want.

>>43333844
This guy draws a lot of incest porn

>>43334381
The style got me worried. Now I know why.

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I love my wife

>>43334381
hot

>>43333844
Yes.

>>43335445
Looks like somepony is demanding her daily dose of snuggles.

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Dyx or Nyx mare?

>>43336250
dyx

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>>43335739

>>43336250
>Made from a mare's desire for recognition and inclusion, neglected to the point of madness.
>Made from a mare's repressed desire to go wild, from 1,000 years of having to be "the responsible one".
Nyx would be an actual wife and mother, but Dyx would be more fun.

Of course, Dyx would likely to get our foals killed in some stupid manner. Even "grown up", she's the embodiment to a rebellious teenager.

>>43319686
The most important is to just keep going, that’s how people in prison get jacked even though they have shitty food and shitty exercises. The second most important part is to always train your muscles to failure, meaning until you can not physically move the weight anymore.

The foundations of muscle building are fairly easy. You should pick an exercise for each major muscle group, and then perfom atleast 6 sets !!!!to failure!!!! per muscle, per week.
Since six sets in a row are too hard on the muscle, you should split it up into 3 sets on two seperate days. It doesn’t really matter how you split it, wether you train fullbody 2x a week, or upper body/lower body. I run a torso limbs split 4 days a week. There are plenty of good sample days online. You should also probably do your own research, there are pretty good channels on youtube when it comes to lifting.
Also consider getting a planet fittness membership, you can not possibly be so broke that you can’t afford 10 bucks a month.

For protein, the best value is going to be buying shitty protein powder, beans, canned tuna and fat free greek yogurt. Tastes like shit but its cheap.

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Donk mare.

>>43336941
>Dyx is for dicking down
>Nyx is for settling down

>>43336941
>Of course, Dyx would likely to get our foals killed in some stupid manner.
Gotta rein her in on that front then.

>>43337741
what if you wanna settle down with dyx

>>43337911
You are willing to be a step-dad for all of her foals? Based responsible Anon!

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>>43337947
Having a hot wife who likes sex and getting to mess with a bunch of silly, cute foals? I don't see the downside.

>>43337947
Who said anything about step dad?

>>43338444
That's a smol mare.
And checked.

>>43338596
4u

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Fine art mare.

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>>43339098

>>43339263
>Black hoodie
Oh no...

>>43339856
Cute Floor.
Would wash her though.

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Would you a tribal mare?

>>43341352
Is it legal to be this comfy?

>>43341526
In Equestria it is.

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I love my horse wife

>>43319543
There's already a thread for this. >>43302715

>>43341512
vigorously

>>43341512
WOULD I?!

>>43342254
That spilled ice cream doubles as a blush.

>>43343452
nope sorry dashie

>>43343738
Anon was reported to HR for sexual harassment shortly after

>>43343740
It's okay. HR is run by Candybutt.

>>43344135
One strategic Pegasus glomp, coming right up.

>>43344569
I think it's just a shadow or so at her eye, but it almost makes her look like she's crying.

>>43345305
Crying tears of happiness

>>43345345
>Sloppa

>>43345347
No, that's Celestia.

>>43341512
I rate this one BAT out of PONY. Would not colonize.

>>43346215
What's wrong with her?

>>43341512
I wonder what the drawback is with this OC.

>>43346317
The 'drawback' is living somewhere in the wilderness. Because tribal.

>>43346321
>not civilizing your barbarian Waifu

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>>43346891
Objectively the cutest mare in all of Equestria!

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>>43347753

>>43347875
Wholesome.

>>43346469
giwtwm

>>43339098
is this Catherine the Greats contraption?

>>43348609
Supposed contraption.

zero

>>43348595
you wish you were the fertile and pregnant trixie?

>>43349120
No, I wish I was that loving and husbandly Anon.

>>43349120
>>43349161
I'll be the pregnant and breedable Trixie!

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>>43346215

>>43349294
i fucking LOVE the little claw digits on the wings that baps have
also, lewd disheveled bap

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Drinking buddy mare.

>>43350674
Why is she crying?

>>43350931
She got alicornized without consent.

>>43350935
Immortality blues is one hell of a thing.

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Military mares deserve love too!

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>>43351156

>>43351156
They do. But I'd be afraid not to be in the condition to keep up with her.

>>43326826
Short still alive post. The next segment is completed, but still needs to be proofread. I hope to get that done before the weekend hits, but I can't guarantee it.

>>43349298
>baps
I keep seeing this term. Is this some kind of meme?

>>43351789
it's short for Batpony

>>43351789
its what you call a hayburger

>>43351857
Thought they generally just referred to as bats.

>>43351877
>the secret formula

>>43352324
Moonie likes it when Anon makes her mad

>>43338185
You know what they say about predators and eyes.

Is it just me, or do things get faster today?

>>43353047
every so often there is a guy that just necrobumps everything to try and shove off threads he doesn't like.

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>>43353190
That's what the lack of mare can do to a guy.

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Cosplay mare.

>>43330571
dang she's pretty

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>>43353504
With mare cosplay you're expected to go with the roleplay at least until you crash on the bed with her. Maybe even after that too.

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>>43353634
gladly

>>43353695
looks fun

>>43353695
>Rainbow insists on keeping the dominant role
Hardly a suprise, but fine.

>>43354559
is that the family guy house?

>>43354564
Petah... Anon is here...

>>43354580
>aww man…
>that reminds me of the time Anon came inside of Rainbow Dash

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Sports mare.

>>43355177
Who's that cute mare?

>>43355323
Goldie Mops.
A NEETmare who's obsessed with kaijus.

>>43355863
>Her sister has to work full time
Wtf Aloe/Lotus?

>>43355797
>who's obsessed with kaijus
Real (as in Equestrian real) or fictional ones?

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>>43356202
fictional

>>43356325
Oh, nice. That's something I could live with.

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>>43355797
I do like me some Goldy Mops.

>>43355177
>mottled coat
Nice. That IS a mottled coat, right?

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>>43356901
I didn't know she talks like that too.

Love is bullshit anyhow.