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>blocks your path
>>
>>2727988
>This niggas ascared of some queen anne's lace
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>>2727988
Why? is it sticky or posinous or something?
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>>2727996
photosensitizing
causes blistering in response to sunlight exposure once it has touched your skin
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>>2727988
What's wrong with wild parsnip?
>>2727996
she thinks its water hemlock.
>>
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>steals your bike
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>>2727996
it turns you into a vampire
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>>2727996
Some plants that look like that are poisonous in the sense that touching them and getting their sap on your skin will then cause you to break out into painful blisters when that skin is exposed to sunlight.
Giant hogweed is the worst of these and the blisters can take months to heal and leave pigmented scars. Others, like cow parsnip, are still toxic, but not nearly as bad.
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>>2727998
>>2728067
Dang. good to know. thnx
>>
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>>2728067
apparently it takes around 7 years after exposure before your sunlight sensitivity returns. you can get even 3rd degree burns from the sun
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>>2727988
>doesn't, because I don't live in INGERLAND
Checkmate tone
>>
Is that?
NATURAL VEGETATION?????
AAAAAA SAVE ME NIGGERMAN
>>
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>>2727988
>be me
>I wear poison ivy like a necklace
>metaphorically speaking because I'm not a hippy dippy shithead
>far off trail
>see a plant about 20 ft up a vertical face
>the wall is made of sandstone and covered in moss
>I am breeder of exotic plants and freelance wildlife conservationist of local endemic plants, therefore I must ascend the vertical wall
>no experience wall climbing
>don't care
>begin free soloing the wall
>California just had heavy rainfall
>ever walked on wet moss and lichen? you don't know slippery until you have
>This vertical face is not only covered in bryophytes and lichen, but also smattered with a diminutive species of stinging nettle
>every hand placement is pain
>in shorts and short sleeve shirt
>the nettle rubbing against my body is like a natural form of torture
>there is no zone on this wall that is NOT covered in nettle
>every clutch is a grasp at nettle
>the sandstone crumbles beneath me with every action compromising every motion
>every movement is one step forward and two steps back
>the nettle is tingling my body like electricity at this point
>every hand placement is FUCKING AGONY
>I slowly and carefully ascend higher and higher until my chosen path of sandstone totally collapses and I fall but thankfully land safely
>I fail and suffer the electric feeling coursing through my body
>I sit, breathe, and calm the fuck down
>resolve to attempt a different path up
>to combat the wall crumbling under me constantly dragging me back down I decide to make small vertical leaps grabbing stones that sometimes fall under me but sometimes hold my weight long enough to get higher and higher
>the stinging nettle brutalizes me but finally I ascend the wall
>the plant is growing in a covey hole that allows rain to wash through and gives me a moment of respite at a steep angle
>at the top now reeling in pseudo-paralysis from the nettle
>admire and snap a photo before making my way back down
pic fucking related it is a blue coffee fern
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>>2728163
did you take a cutting at least that you can propagate?
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>>2728163
before any fag goes pc on me I have to also say that this landscape is prone to changing every time it rains. landslides destroy and create new terrain. the fauna here is adapted to that and can regrow from being totally buried.
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>>2728165
I took a division. the fern is still to this day perched perilously on its precipitous ledge for all to appreciate
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>>2728170
cool beans. I live right at the edge of a national park and I should really be getting some cuttings or seedlings of interesting plants. I have lots of garden and houseplants but most of them aren't native, and I really prefer native plants
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>>2728174
it takes great care anon. This is probably illegal and rangers sometimes are only young employees and don't know shit and probably don't care either. My intent revolving native plants is to 1. never take something whole, because that wouldn't make me any better than a poacher, and 2. do it with intent to multiply in cultivation in order to re-introduce more of that individual back to its native range upon returning. I do sell on the side but that is my hustle
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>>2728174
my last advice is to wear gloves. I cannot stress how many times I have had microscopic worms burrow under my nails only to be long stretches of hours from civi. the worms have a natural instinct to dig down giving them plenty of time to bury themselves in my flesh. I recommend dipping your hands in alcohol and make sure to massage your finger tips to work the spirit into their little holes. if it's burning that means it's working
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>>2728163
>>2728184
I feel secondhand embarrassment from how retarded you are.
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>>2728181
>>2728184
yeah I'll have to suss it out. not everything can be taken as a cutting but I'll do some research. we're going into winter now so I probably won't be much until spring when everything begins sprouting its new growth
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>>2728188
have sex and take a shower anon feel better in the morning. I have valued customers and friends around the world I must consult with about buying, selling, and trading exotic plants.
feels good owning my own business
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>>2728036
heh i just saw a red-winged blackbird while hiking in a wetland today
>>
19th century retards imported these things to plant in their ornamental gardens, but they escaped and now they're all up and down many riverbanks, people get fucked up by then every year

t. UK
>>
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>>2728215
a stand will appear occasionally around New England and the DEP terminates them with extreme prejudice. One time I went out for a long walk in the woods and through the old fields hoping to find a stand of them, but alas it was not to be.
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>>2727991
You can tell it is Giant Hogweed by the size of it. Queen Annes Lace only grows up to 4 feet.
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>>2728163
You must grasp the nettle firmly, anon.
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>>2727988
>>>blocks your path

"Hans, the flammenwerfer ...."rstt
>>
>>
>>2728215
I still have scars.

Got hit by it in Norfolk.
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>>2728036
a blackbird stole my bike.
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>>2728215
You bongers brought them over the canal. They grow like fucking bamboo on our clay and now i have to dedicate 2/5th of a year either shoveling, cutting and burning them down only for them to pop up again a week later, or deal with endless visitor complaints about muh burns bro muh kids bro muh dogs rangerman please help meeee

Sometimes considering violating every single pesticide law just to get rid of them. If i could buy a mint tank of agent orange i would
>>
>>2728361
Bad idea
The phototoxins proliferate throughout the air and catching a few breaths will kill your ass dead. Poison ivy/oak/sumac has a similar hazard from burning
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>>2728826
Kek
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>>2727996
It makes you gay
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When I walk outdoors I pick up these seeds and disperse them everywhere like I’m Gambit. Am I doing something wrong? They even stick to people’s clothes when you throw them.
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>>2728163
based and fern-pilled

the normies hate that you have something worth putting yourself through physical discomfort for.

when i was in like 8th grade me and my friends used to take off our shirts and wrestle in the field behind the school during out break. i got thrown into a patch of bull nettle and it was to this day one of the worst pains i have felt all over my back. sitting in english class afterwards i legit wanted to die. i have nothing but respect for what you did even if it was potentially a weaker species of nettles.
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>>2728163
At least stinging nettle pain goes away pretty quickly and doesn't do any long-term damage. It's actually medicinal for joint pain/arthritis. It's also edible after boiling/steaming the needles.
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>>2729659
I used to think this was wheat
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>>2730678
Holy kek. She's going to be in the hurt locker.
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>>2728344
>You can tell it is Giant Hogweed by the size of it.
That's completely false. The pic is me with a hemlock stem that was over 3m tall.
Noticeably higher specimens grew nearby on a steep river bank, I did not risk falling down for a better photo.

Telling people that the size is a good way to tell apart giant hogweed is just conning them.
Giant hogweed grows only basal leaves for the first few years, and while the leaves are huge, the plant is usually not taller than its surroundings.
Only on the final year it grows a stem, flowers, spreads seeds and dies.
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>>2730698
in the future, make a fist on your hip so you don't look as fruity
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>>2730690
imagine not being able to be touched by the sun for like a decade. I feel so bad for kids who end up playing in this stuff. childhood ruined
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Devil's Club

>has spikes capable of piercing leather gloves and boots
>has a stinging barb that often breaks off inside skin
>is nearly indestructible, unfazed by fire or extreme cold, growing new shoots in a week.
>somehow also carries an incredible anti inflammatory drug that does wonders for arthritis and other joint aliments
>generates a potent psychotropic drug within its green woody stem, while every other part of the plant is poisonous.
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>>2728215
They have massive warning signs on a river near Manchester I used to walk around.

But no attempts whatsoever to control it. They've just accepted it's here, and warn people not to go near it.

The thing is, it wasn't there 5 years before. But when it arrived, it fucking loved the area and took over, outcompeted all the native plants and the response of the council was just to put up signs. Now we have to permanently live with it.
>>
>The plant was common only in the Caucasus area until it started to be used as a silage plant in other parts of the Soviet Union. As a result, it quickly spread in many areas of Russia, Belarus, and Ukraine. It is now a highly invasive plant in the Baltic States, Russia, Poland, and Belarus

>The decision to use the plant for silage was made in 1947 under Stalin's rule, so when the species later proved to be highly invasive and difficult to remove, people started to call it "Stalin's revenge
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>>2730769
Psychotropics are also supposed to be a poison so you could just assume the whole thing is a bundle of poison.
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>>2728163
So this is the fabled faustian spirit
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>>2730678
DROP THAT RIIGHT NOW
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>>2728064
Tf it does. Take a bleach bath and it's fixed
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>>2730769
Total devil's club death. At least cow parsnip has some redeeming qualities - Its young leaves are edible, as are the stalks after being peeled. Devil's club, on the other hand, could be exterminated tomorrow and the world would rejoice.
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>>2733942
you say that now but it did wonders for the elderly loggers i knew. They used it to make teas that unlocked all their joints better than a lot of prescription meds.
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>>2734354
>unlocked all their joints
lmao goofy
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>>2728067
>cow parsnip
Is it not cow parsley?
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>>2727988
I've recently got a new job, in a new place. It's countryside but on the edge of a sizeable town, and the entire area is littered with this stuff. I see the edges of public walkways and pavements lined with it, fields and hedge-rows overcome by the stuff. Grows right up to the road, and nobody has done anything about it. Part of me wants to reach out and touch it just to see its effects, but I think not.
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>>2731009
Okay, so this is what has happened here (>>2736472) too by the looks of it, since I'm also in the North of England.
>>
>>2736476
>>2736472
>>2731009
There is a purposeful effort being made to make going /out/ in England as unpleasant and dangerous as possible either in actuality or in perception.
I mean look at the state of the sewage dumping in all natural swimming spots.
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>>2736472
You'd probably be fine just poking it. It's the sap within that causes problems most often. I've brushed up against it walking around before and had no issues.
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>>2736432
Plants can have dozens of local names. Which is why botanists use latin names to talk about plants
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>>2727988
Can giant hogweed actually grow anywhere I've only seen it near rivers
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>>2737074
according to google they're pretty much limited to riverbanks and sunny marshy spots. so yeah it makes sense. kind of needs a combination of soily wetlands but also full sun.

little unappointed I didn't see any when I hiked the Midstate Trail a couple years ago
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>>2737074
They can grow anywhere but the seeds mainly spread through rivers and ditches.



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