Ya think I could take a chop?
>>16166186George, you can't take the chop!
I was in the pool!!!
>>16166233I could take a chop! You think I couldn't take a chop? I'm choppable! Gunther, Kobashi, Flair. They'd be lucky to chop a guy like me!
I'M HERE TO SAY THE WORDI'M HERE TO SAY THE WORD
>>16166186>You see, Jerry, I don’t like the chop. I’m not a chop guy. I’m a flip guy. You remember what the coach called me in school? Flip George! Oh he couldn’t get enough of it Jerry! I’d do flip after flip after flip! Think about it! Everyone likes the flip!>You’re an idiot you know that?
>>16167825>monster poo
>>16168150>Well, I was out with this guy and we were watching a match, right?>It was all going well and I was about to make a move, but...>What happened?>Well... he popped for a flip, Jerry>A flip?>A flip. He just went wild for it! Not some good chain wrestling, not a fighting spirit spot, not even a finisher! He popped for a flip! I'm dating a flip popper!>Well you don't date flip poppers!
Does Kramer shill for the flippiest of shitters or the most old school catch wrestling style?
>>16168404Kramer is an e-drone
>>16168419>>16168404Kramer was a massive Sammartino mark, but you just know that he'd pop for the Bucks stuff too.
Kramer taking a stunner would be epic
>YA SEE PUDDYUHHH. YOU REALLY THINK SOMEONE LIKE YOU CAN BE CHAMPION?>Yeah that’s right.
>You're as pretty as any of them. You just need a nose job.
>>16168889Kys
>>16168404Kramer starts telling you about backyard wrestling spots from Germany in the 90s he watched on tapes he bought off the dark web.
>>16168404Kramer's got the inside shoot on things before they even happen.
>>16168925>My friend Bob Sacramanto watches backyard wrestling tapes all the time! He gets them from his butcher!
>>16167825
>>16168401>elaine im gonna do a moonsault>putty...>doing a moonsault
>>16169715>Really? A moooonsault?>Yeah, that's right.
>>16169731
>>16166186
>>16168404Kramer's story in a wrestling episode of Seinfeld would be that he doesn't even like wrestling but for whatever reason, he's best friends with the wrestlers>Macho Man just hanging out in Kramer's apartment exits to meet Jerry in the hall, who is a huge fan>Wow, Kramer, you must really like wrestling?>Me? Nahhhh... Me and Macho met at the swapmeet.
>>16170291macho only calls him cosmo or cosmic
>>16170291>>16170307>Kramer joins the Sheikh's anti-American faction and shows up carrying the Iraq flag in full military uniform, smoking a cigar in sunglasses
>>16170308>Kramer comes up with the plan to fly planes into the World Trade Center as a rib.> 9/11 happens.> "Well I didn't think they'd actually go thru with it!"
>>16170382>Hey, what happened to your friend Mohamed?>Oh, you won't be seeing him again.>You mean he actually went through with it? >C'mon, Jerry! He would have felt reeeally embaressed not taking advantage of all those flight lessons!>Yeah, that would be a shame.
paul heyman shows up and the entire episode is about jerry trying not to become an antisemite
>Jerry did you read the latest Observer yet? I can't believe this! 5 stars to the Bucks match again!>5 stars for that?>5 stars! 5 stars AGAIN! How many times did the Rockers get 5 stars Jerry? >Did they ever get 5 stars? >Not once Jerry! Man I would LOVE to give him a piece of my mind...>*Kramer enters*>WOOZAH what a pump! Jerry I'm telling you, that new gym they opened on 4th Street, the machines there will maximize and tenderize your muscles like NOTHIN ELSE! You and George should join me, I'm going back again tomorrow>Since when are you a fitness freak Kramer?>Since my guy Meltzer is in town, boy I tell you what, he has all the ins to every gym in America!>Meltzer... Dave Meltzer?>You know him George? I met him when I was out in Cali.>Oh I'll be joining you tomorrow Kramer... And I hope you're ready to work up a sweat!
one of the worst threads in a long time
>>16170749so just like an episode of Seinfeld
>>16170749Have you seen the catalog?
>>16170642The only way this would end is George getting so hyped up to confront Meltzer that he psyches himself out and instantly deflates. Just agrees with everything Meltzer says. After that, George starts using the term "rope work" unironically.
>>16166186His dad would bury him
>the ocean called they're running out of shrimp
>>16169129Only one to ever seem tough working a clown gimmick
>>16166186>she chanted MEAT FOREVER, Jerry
>And by the way... they're real, and they're spectacular
>>16170914Frank would reveal he actually wrestled in the territories back in the day after he got back from Korea and knew all the old legends personally.
>>16170749I know. We could be using this thread to consolewar!
>>16170983man hands
>>16170914>>16171054>I was there! I stabbed Bruiser!
>>16171730>Frank stabbed Bruiser over an argument about something completely innocuous, like his silver dollar collection>Frank worked on the crew that hung Owen's harness cables>Frank is the one who recommended Fritz Von Erich to push his children into wrestling>Frank gave Chris Candido pneumonia >Frank introduced the wrestling business to steroids>Frank inadvertently gave Kevin Sullivan the idea to murder Chris and Nancy
>>16170781>So rope work, huh George?>Dave was very convincing!>bass slap
>>16166249ayooooo look at the pokies on the left finna bustola
Seinfeld is to 4chan what Always Sunny is to Reddit
>>16172230Gay shit nobody watched?
>>16172257Nah not your sex tape
>>16172569Lmfao
>>16166186george's wardrobe was drippy, i can't even find a cable knit green cardigan for sale online.
>>16170382that's basically the 9/11 script.https://randomnerds.com/wp-content/uploads/2016/08/Seinfeld-The-Twin-Towers-Billy-Domineau.pdf
>>16172636Probably because it's several decades ago.
>>16166327>>16168401>>16168150>>16170642I kek'd>>16170749lol zoomers mad
>>16171911>>16172651
>>16172636try looking for womens and going a size or two up. i also dig the 'tired and spiteful' look of 90s george and sometimes you gotta swallow your pride and hit the chick section if you want to look fresh
>>16172636Hit up Goodwill and thrift shops.
Taking the first chop is easy. Your pride will not allow you to back out. You know it will hurt, but you still not aware of how much. But once you recieve it, the little hope you held it wouldn't hurt that much will be drown away in pain and tears that it is unlikely you will have the same bravado for the next one.The first one is easy. The second? Not so much.
>>16172220Some busted up asian whore is no true treat. Feast upon a true 10/10 bimbo with delicious pokies.
>What if we start a stuttering gimmick or a homeless gimmick?>No! No more new gimmicks! I'm sorry, you have to do a job.>Dammit.
>>16174271>What's your gimmick?>I'm at architect.>You're an architect?>I'm not? >I don't see an architecture gimmick coming from you.
>>16174345>Your new name will be Art Vandelay and you run the Vandelay Industries stable.>Vandelay Industries. What's that?>You're into latex.
>>16174431No, Kramer's gimmick is a big money exec who owns Kramerica Industries, which does latex. Think of a cross between Mr McMahon, Ted DiBiase, and JBL. Vandaley Industries is an importer/exporter, which is why the stable is always rotating jobbers.
>>16174480Peter Van Nostrand
>>16174528Are you sure it's not H.E. Pennypacker? The wealthy industrialist, philanthropist, and bicyclist?
>>16174546That was his character being renamed when he joined WCW in the eighth season to avoid WWF filing a lawsuit for using the copy written name.
>>16174562What's his gimmick?
>>16174618Not really sure. WCW didn't have a clue of what they were going to do with Kramer. In fact, they had him sit back and collect his 5 million a year contract most of the time. It was around this time that WWF got Elaine over with a new dancing gimmick. >Sweet Fancy Moses!
>>16174728No, I meant what is Jerry's gimmick.
>>16172651Fucking kek. I'd always wondered what Seinfeld would have been like if it went on after 9/11.
>>16174345Art Vandelay is not cool
>>16166186>wait a minute Jerry, wait a minute! George is getting an idea! What if we started a wrestling promotion? Think about! Me you working together!>I don’t know George remember you tried to book that match between Mick Foley and the Undertaker and you ended up in wrestler’s court?>Yeah…>How did that go?>Atomic wedgie….but listen, what if, and hear me out, what if we make the matches about nothing? Nothing Jerry!>You don’t watch AEW, huh?
>>16174840>You don’t watch AEW, huh?I popped
>>16168404Kramer is a yano and r-truth chad
>Jerry and George are edrones>Elaine reluctantly defends AEW and hates Vince>Kramer only watches NJPW "because kayfabe is dead"
>>16175217No, Jerry is an e-droneGeorge doesn't watch wrestlingElaine doesn't like wrestling but lands a job at WWENewman is a die-hard AEW fan and console wars with JerryKramer only watches old territory stuff on VHS
>>16168541More like an everything job. Not that there's anything wrong with that!
>>16175251Kramer is in such an old school bubble he doesn't even know the territories are dead. >Stone Cold? Who's that? Some kind of polar explorer? Does he wrestle in Memphis or Mid-Atlantic?
>jimmy doesn't like new bloodlines>jimmy and new bloodlines clash>hands off JIMMY
>>16174752Jerry is the company ace but a part-timer. He is also the head booker. He had that unfortunate back injury when Mr. Mandelbaum viciously attacked Jerry and dragged him with him roped to his car.
>It's called a gig Elaine>You take this you run it across the hairline>Kramer I don't know>Just.. do it quickly
It got really stupid when Elaine joined the Wyatt Sicks.
>>16176042The same episode we got Frank's infamous promo and heel turn.
>>16176063>festivus is realhttps://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Daniel_O%27Keefe_(writer)
>>16168404kramer is dave meltzer
>>16172651>the guy who wrote this went on to write for family guykek kinda based
>>16176521That's really cool.
>>16176029i read this like theyre just about to jerk the curtain and kramer is desperately trying to get elaine to blade him
>>16176711Kramer would blade himself and it'd end up like that scene in UHF where Emo Phillips accidentally cuts off his finger and blood is spurting everywhere.
>>16176018>The Mandelbaum's have been wrestling in this business for 100 years! You think you're better than us?
>>16177217>So, you think you're better than me? Step aside string bean.>Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum!
>Kramer: I'M OUT>Elaine: What?>Kramer: I'm out of the rumble>George: You're out?>Elaine: Wow! That was fast.>Kramer: It was Kane across the ring. You better be careful, he's gonna get you next.
>>16177308>seinfeld pulls newman over the top rope 'accidentally' letting bania win
>THEY’RE SHAKING HANDS!>JERRY SEINFELD IS SHAKING HANDS WITH SATAN HIMSELF! FOR THE LOVE OF GOD, SOMEONE TELL ME THIS IS NOT HAPPENING!
>>16177254
