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YER a Goblin of the GoblinSlayer universe. By sheer astronomical odds, while fleeing GoblingSlayer, aka the GobboCaust, you meet anuvva unlucky bastich: Yang Wuhan, 殃污琀, "Calamity-Corrupted Corpsepearl", also known as Divine Demon, Wyrmacide, Sword Specter, Wind Incarnadine, Gore Walker, Blade Emperor, the Absolute™, &c &c, who just got BTFO'd by an alliance of Righteous and Deviant Cultivators from his home universe.

In exchange for the lifesaving Thousand Year Lingzi you just happened to find just now, he swears to do you no harm and take you as his Disciple - Tudi - or, Toady, as your Teacher - Shifu - or, Seafood.

Since then you've been busy:

Getting Seafood a little-girl Pall Body to operate in while he seeks to restore his fatally damaged real body; learning the [Thousand Segment Carrionpede] form to the Fourth Moulting; killing a whole town for funzies n lewtz; got shotgun married to a ghost bint who tries to kill you in your dreams every 10days or so Seafudds sez it'z to dodge karma n build character; you think it might also be juzt because he'z a roit kunt; temping with the Rhean (GSverse Halflings) Resistance as a SoB for hire against Myrmid (GSverse literal bugmen) expansionism; exploring and destroying an ancient Dimm City; joining Orc Fight Club "with consent"; get bodymodded without consent; bag a Blew Bewbd Efreet from an Ice Dunjjon; investigated, with partial failure, a lead about sumfin sussy in va state 'a dem Orks.

PREV EPISODES

1: http://thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive/2024/6051761

2:
http://thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive/2024/6068523

3:
https://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive/2024/6083225

4: https://suptg.thisisnotatrueending.com/qstarchive/2024/6126087

RIGHT NOW:

For his last major success, Toady has been given a holla-die by Seafood to do as he likes, and chose to stirr shit up in Orky Country.

Seafood has "requested“ Toady get the Orc ShammyBoss Dulugtangor's hedd or staff as a gratuity for making Toady a new indestructible GIGA GLUGGZ Helff Potty container.

Dulugtangor is strongly tied to Clewfinda aka Jinx Finx, a sussy foot scout who may be involved with Dorf Peacekeepers and Humie Green Cloak Rangers.

Toady has just been registered and released as a trespassing non-belligerant in the Orc-cupied Zone by the Peacekeepers. If he gets detained by Peacekeepers again before clearing his name by reporting to an Adventurers' Guild and working off his trespass, he will be Interrogated at -25% disadvantage.

Having all his kit confiscated by the Dorfs has alerted Toady to the possibility that his pending {{{WEESH}}} from the captured Blew Bewbd Efreet might still be taken from him, and is strongly considering cashing it.

The {{{WEESH}}} has to be in 7 words to be at full reality-bending strength. QM gives its word there will be no traps in the {{{WEESH}}}. Natural narrative consequences notwithstanding.
>>
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[VOTE:]
CHOICE 1:
WAT DO ABART DA SUSSY BIZNIZ AMONG DA ORCZ

>Report your findings to Dokk, the one who recruited you for help against the sussyness
>Findings: Dorf Fort and Green Cloaks are in cahoots CONFIRMED
>Jinx Finx association with either NOT CONFIRMED

OR

>I'z done wiv dis sussy-sniffing shidd
>Cut short the holla-die, get back to Seafudds

OR

>get down to sum REEL holla-dieying
>Got juzt 15 days left!
>WANNA NARMZ
>N DRANKZ
>N HOORZ

OR

>ELS?
>Write-in yer galaxysponge idees

CHOICE 2:
WAT DO ABART MUH {{{WEESH}}}
Moar Oww the (ex-humie Cleric) Dimm Wraith has given some help to Toady's wording of his WEESH. The following possible options have been submitted. QM has made the utterances Gobliny for fluff purposes; the Wish will deliver as intended.

>"Gimme high magikkal a-fitt-nifty, potent-all n profit-sensy"

OR

>"Gimme fasttyyest, powfattest, endless regennyratgun."

OR

>"Gimme un-limited benefitty-all potent-all for everfing."

OR

>"Make LUKK always in me favor!"

OR

>"Gimme ability ter permanently steal abilities!"
>by QM fiat the operative word "steal" can no longer be changed

OR

>nerr. Needa fink moar.
>hold on to the {{{WEESH}}}

CHOICE 2A

>Resolve in your heart: release Blew Bewbz when she has granted your Weesh, Y/N

Be informed that Efreeti and Genie don't mind enslaving, but strongly resent being enslaved.

Toady subdued Blew Bewbz the first time by successful ambush and a multistage tactical fight with her servants.

Subduing her a second time will take a 1v1 with her at full power and motivation, and gain a {Wish} at ~50% strength.
>>
Rolled 2 (1d4)

>>6160043
>Report your findings to Dokk, the one who recruited you for help against the sussyness

Hmm...I'll admit, I'm actually a little at odds. A lot of the wishes sound good. So my vote will be in the hands of lady luck herself.
1: Regeneration.
2: Potential with everything.
3: Lucky!
4: Ability Thief.

I'm not including magical affinity in my list, because it basically serves the same purpose as potential with everything but more specific. There's no need for that, as the QM has assured us it won't be trapped.

>Do not release her
I don't trust like that. I'd sooner kill her than let her go, to be honest.
>>
>>6160043
>Report your findings to Dokk, the one who recruited you for help against the sussyness

The WEESH thing really depends on where it draws its power from. As seafud said, the people of this world are weak because all of their powers are borrowed, not something they own. For example, magical affinity would not mean all that much if it's "borrowed" from the world, nor luck, nor potential for everything.
As it is though, I'm leaning towards luck or potential for everything, whichever one that isn't merely bound to this world, if any.

As it is, we still need a trophy for Seafuds. It'd either have to be Blew Bewbs (possibly meaning we give up or wish or else have to fight her again) or the head or staff of the shammy.
>>
>>6160067
Also, we we make a weesh, I resolve to...
RELEASE HER TO SEAFUDS :DDDD
>>
>>6160043
>Call on Dokk, tell him your findings.
>Dint catch Clewfinda at anyfing
>But va Dorfs n Green Cloaks r cahooting.
explain that we we think clewfinda works for/with the green cloaks. our working theory is that he is tasked with thinning out gobbo ranks by leading them to death, preventing the build up of a large enough force that could take over the dorfy fort. we suggest to cast detect/dispell magic on him because he might very well be one of them in disguise, judging by his skill set
>"Gimme high magikkal a-fatty-nifty, potent-all n profit-sensy"
>Resolve in your heart: release Blew Bewbz when she has granted your Weesh, N
we can squeeze one more out of her
i have a good idea for a second wish that makes it very hard for her to screw us with it
if my wish isnt picked i will preemptively say i-told-you-so when the results arent as desired (becoming OP)
>>
>>6160075
any anon who missed the end of the last thread i recommend reading through the last discussionnot expecting it will influence your choice but do it anyway
>>6160056
>>
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>>6160067
>Seafood said all the powers of the people of this world are borrowed
Slight correction: Seafood said that the spells of God-botherers are not truly their own: Paladins, Clerics, and similar. Once they die or lose their class, like Fallen Paladins and Clerics, they lose their class spells. Thus, they don't "own" their spells; it's all on loan by their pfeh Gods.

>The WEESH thing really depends on where it draws its power from

The Efreet is an Outsider who can meddle with any mundane reality. The WEESH's result will be in effect on any mortal realm, up to and including Sigil (until the Lady notices).

It will still work but in greatly diminished capacity in places where (certain) Outsiders have Eminent Domain, such as Godrealms.
>>
>>6160075
h-HEY
>>
Hey QM, how would you rank each wish in terms of how difficult it would be to hide from Sifu?
My guesses, in order of least difficult to hide to most difficult to hide or bullshit away, would be:
>Lucky.
>All potential, no proficiency.
>Magical potential plus proficiency.
>Stealing abilities.
>Regeneration.
>>
>>6160124
QM ranks as follows, low to high:
>Lucky, Regen, Steal Ability, same tier initially
>Magical potential plus proficiency
>Unlimited all-potential

Seafood won't notice initially, especially if you don't pull stunts in front of him; he's too focused on the upcoming []HEIST[] and restoring his original body at this time.

Demonstrate slavish loyalty and heaps of tribute before he regains his original body, and he won't be too ruffled when he finds out.

The moment he perceives that Toady might become his peer however - vis, Toady has significant accomplishments in all 3 XianXia domains: Martial, Alchemy, Sorcery - he will feel first jealousy, then envy, then fear.

A countdown will start on the "Destroy your Kungfu" trope.
>>
>>6160134
Interesting, I was actually decently wrong. I'd assumed that all-potential would go unnoticed for a while because Sifu would have little to no reason to check his potentials again.
I also thought that steal ability and regen would be pretty noticeable when he started doing things goblins aren't normally capable of, ie reattaching his own severed head or some shit like that.
>>
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>>6160139
>attaching his own severed hedd
Unless Seafood kills Toady himself to see this happen, it won't.

Toady is in practice YWH's dogsbody; death and dismemberment will usually happen during undertakings out of Seafood's sight.

Give Seafood a reason to become curious about your BaZi(Eight Characters horoscopy) and ZiWei(Purple Star astrology) again however, he will be alarmed at how much your fate has changed.

>how do we give him a reason to search our BaZi + ZiWei again?
By disagreeing with him successfully; by challenging and beating him at anything requiring skill or knowledge; even by helping him succeed, if your expected capability should not be sufficient.

Before you are ready, you must maintain a cretinous existence before him.

Apart from his desperation at the time, this existential gap was a significant reason why he offered Discipleship to you at all.

>dafuggisdis QM
A XianXia Deviant-Supreme. For YWH, all the Dark Triad / Dark Factor boxes in the current DSM-5 would have been ticked and shakily pencilled.
>>
>>6160043
>Report your findings to Dokk, the one who recruited you for help against the sussyness
>"Gimme high magikkal a-fitt-nifty, potent-all n profit-sensy"
>>
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VOTE TALLY

CAMPAIGN
>Report to Dokk
Unanimous.

WEESH
>"Gimme high magikkal a-fitt-nifty, potent-all n profit-sensy"
>>6160075
>>6160387

>"Gimme un-limited benefitty-all potent-all for everfing."
>>6160067
>>6160051

>"LUKK"
>>6160067 (alt vote)

WAT DO W/ BLEW BEWBZ AFTA WEESH
>RELEASE NO
>>6160051
>>6160075

>RELEASE YES
None.

Anyone else who hasn't voted on any particular, 24hrs.

QM will 1DX in the case of a tie.
>>
>>6160613
i was just about to ask if you will update today lel
>>
>>6160616
planned to, but the votes are too shakey, and some anons that voted for one decision didn't commit on other decisions.

QM trying not to meddle.
>>
>>6160134
Alright, since this list came out, I'm going to swap to:
>Luck

It has one other (alt) vote. It's not the strongest, I know, but it's the most subtle. I want to NOT get discovered by Sifu, as long as possible. And probability alteration is always a good pick to be honest.
>>6160616
Can I convince you to at least switch to Luck? It's subtler than both all-potential and magical-potential. And it really does solve our nat 1 issues and then some.
>>
>>6160139
>thought that all-potential wouldn't get noticed.
Toady, who did not have a natural spiritual root or a beast core, comes back from his holidays with a Pristine Origin Root, Formless Primordial Core, sublime intuition of all Dao paths, eidetic polymathic understanding, and a physique capable of HRNGG and WOOSH and KILLYKILL martial arts combined.

It will be a race between Toady faking continued cretiny and Seafood regaining 50% of his powers.
>>
>>6160689
I will consider switching my vote if... (i really want my magic tho. we wont be getting it any other way)
we not only get our NAT 1s turned into 100s, but enemy NAT 100s turned into 1s
>>6160730
will QM approve?
>>
>>6160737
It may end up having a greater effect than that. Have you ever heard of the butterfly effect?
Imagine a butterfly effect that starts from the moment of the wish to make everything go smoother for you in life.
You intend to rob the local bank. The guard has dysentery that day, which causes him to occupy the toilets and loudly shit. The noises he makes cover up your own noises. The smell of it disturbs the local dragon contracted to sit upon the pile of coins so much that it flies off to get a break from the smell for a while. The vault door also happens to be getting worked on this week, and the worker for it is currently on his lunch break. He forgot to close it again, because he's busy thinking about his daughter, who recently got into an accident from a runaway carriage slamming into her after the horses got startled by a random...butterfly. Speaking of which, that butterfly ended up eating some contaminated rotting food and landing in the guard's lunch earlier, thus giving him that dysyntery to begin with.
>>
>>6160743
that would be OP which is why QM wont allow it
as i said before, every other wish aims to make us OP while i simply ask for magic. meaning that at least with my wish its clear what we will get and not be disappointed when QM nerfs any of the other wishes desired outcome.
if i remember correctly QM even said it will only affect rolls
its too late now, but QM should have stated how he will implement each wish. as demonstrated last thread the "steal abilities" one turned out to be not as powerful as first thought after i asked for clarifications several times
maybe it also wouldn't be a bad idea to put the original wording in brackets next to the toady-speak version
>>
>>6160757
I don't think OP would disallow it. It's entirely within the spirit of fortune favoring you always.
That being said, I could see him potentially implementing the wish more simply by raising our results by a tier and lowering enemy results a tier.
Critfail -> fail, fail -> success, success -> Critsuccess for toady. Reversed for enemies.
We'll have to wait and see for implementation. But I gotta say, you're really picky, you know? I get you really want magic here and now, but this is hardly the only chance we'll ever get of getting magic. Especially if we have luck on our side.
>>
>>6160737
QM has been twigging how to do this mechanically.

For now, LUKKMAXXing means:

BUFFS:
>Enemy Nat100 is a flat 100, no crit effect
>Self Nat1 is Nat100
>Self Nat100 causes the nearest dice, left or right at QM discretion, to gain Nat100
>LUKKY TUCH: Doubles, 11, 22, &c, 99, give +7 to the D100; 77 gives +21
>Gui Li, a cursed spirit, will only invade his dreams when Toady permits it; there just *never* seems to be a good time to haunt him any more. 1x haunting per ~20 days.

NERFS:
>So long as Toady is above 50% HP, he rolls Bo3 instead of BoA, to reflect his newfound complacency.
>If Toady DOESNT permit Gui Li to haunt him 1x per 20 days, he loses the LUKKY TUCH until he does.
>>
>>6160758
picky? more like critical
oh look QM just replied
what i am trying to say is that my wish is the only one clearly defined and not a "mystery box"
if blew bewbz would screw with our wish here any other choice would result in potentially huge fuckery (like what will happen when we make a 2nd wish)
>>
>>6160759
good effort QM
now did the anon who came up with this wish think it would turn out this way? likely not.
now there are draw backs even
>>
>>6160760
Negro please. I'm looking at the exact same options you are, and your option is not any more defined than the rest of them.
>Gimme high magical affinity, potential, and proficiency.
Gives you a high (yet still limited) capacity for magic, and immediate proficiency with that magic so you can actually utilize it without training. Further training and development may be possible, but it's unclear on if we're immediately put at our cap or not.

Quoting the exact wording of anon from the previous thread:
>Gimme nondraining, fastest, perfect, endless regeneration
Gives you the most effective regenerative ability the wish can manage, without imperfections in the process, and without draining your resources such as calories. This may also keep us eternally youthful due to telomeres no longer shortening. Cancer is of no concern anymore, too.

>Gimme unlimited beneficial potential for everything.
Not even the sky is the limit for absolutely everything Toady could want to do. He gains no proficiency whatsoever with it, but his potential absolutely skyrockets. Any skill can be learned. Any ability can be trained higher. Any language can be spoken. All it takes is the right kind of training for whatever he sets his mind to.

>Make Luck always in my favor!
Probabilities always skew positively in favor of Toady. If it relates to toady in some way, chance will lean towards him. I don't really need to explain this one, https://powerlisting.fandom.com/wiki/Luck does it well enough. Per QM explanation, critfails are crits for toady, and no more crits for enemies. Nat 100s expand to nearby dice. Dubs give extra points on rolls, and gui li gets cucked.

>Gimme ability to permanently steal abilities!
Did recieve QM clarification, thrice per day we can attempt to steal another's abilities such as features or racial shit. Can incur mutations if features require certain biology, and can be resisted if something loses its soul. Unsure if it can work on things that NEVER had a soul, like a Golem. Surprisingly not a very noticeable thing to sifu, which means sifu may have a similar ability of his own or has encountered such things in the past. Could potentially be strengthened in the future, given how these things usually snowball.

>>6160774
Note how the drawbacks are from complacency and gui li's presence. If he eliminates his complacency and gui li in the future, there are no more nerfs.
>>
>>6160777
i defined my wish as follows:
>>the intended outcome would be that toady can learn any spell of any level (of any class, but for balancing reasons i can understand if not) with no side effects like exhaustion or misfiring. he can identify items, use items normally only magic class creatures could and cast cantrips right away. (among other things)
which QM approved of (he at least didnt say something leading me to believe he doesnt)
personally i dont like being OP and i also know QM cant let us be OP just like that (and at this point we didnt know that our wish would be granted without any unwanted side effects)
i see a "small" upgrade as more than enough of a bonus reward from a side mission of a side quest. without me we wouldnt even have that wish btw (no one wanted to go in the dungeon and then to the boss at first)
>>6160759
can we get clarification on
>Gimme nondraining, fastest, perfect, endless regeneration
QM? (sorry to bother you again)
>>
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>>6160774
There will be narrative effects to all Wishes, "drawbacks" like Toady's new complacency and Gui Li negating LUKKY TUCH if not dealt with, per QM post >>6160759.

>Potent-All
Main challenge: Toady has to powerlevel while playing a cretin and hopefully surpass Seafood before he notices, vis, YWH's original body restored, ~35% full power. (Sabotaging Seafood's efforts is always an option)

>Majjik-all
Main challenge: Same as above, but Seafood needs to get to 50+% full power.

{WISH} will do what it says on the tin; narrative will unfold in response.

As blessedtripps anon >>6160777 points out, all narrative obstacles can be overcome unless anons manage to cleverly paint themselves into a corner somehow. QM doesn't know how, but understands that some anons will actively unironically shit in the jacuzzi.
>>
>>6160043
>>6160613
>Report your findings to Dokk, the one who recruited you for help against the sussyness
>"Gimme ability ter permanently steal abilities!"
>Resolve in your heart: release Blew Bewbz when she has granted your Weesh, Y
>>
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>>6160787
>sorry furva bovva
Don't worry about it.
: )

>Gimme nondraining, fastest, perfect, endless regeneration

BUFF:
>HP will go from 0 to cap in one turn
>Physical destruction beyond -HPcap may take several minutes
>Destruction of mind or soul may take several weeks
>Destruction of existence may take a full year
>Leotard Lobo x Deadpool
>picrel^n
>>
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>>6160787
NERF:
>If you ever get profiled, you can be identified by your perfect regeneration
>There are ways to deal with perfect regenerators, such as live burials
>and picrel
>>
>>6160819
Ignore my deleted post, for I'm retarded and misremembered things.

Interesting to see that regeneration has some effect on mind, soul, and existence. I wonder if it would end up regenerating magical reserves or other resources than just HP once we inevitably gain access to such things. Chi reserves? Psi pool? Stamina? A lot of questions to be answered with this one, questions that I think would be better answered in-quest if we were to pick it. Kind of reminds me of the intricacies of regeneration in Ajin, if you've ever read it - they had cool details like "Destroys matter that gets in the way of regeneration" and "Requires a full death for regeneration to start".
>>
>>6160825
>requires death for Regen to start
lol, WEAK
>>
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>>6160836
True, but I think they did that to make it harder for the Ajin.
Another kewl fact about them is that they always regenerate from the largest chunk of flesh available, no matter what that is or where it is. This has been abused by someone intentionally chopping off their flesh, storing it somewhere or sending it to a highly secure location that's otherwise impossible to infiltrate, and arranging for their body to turn into soup when they die as a form of fast travel.
>>
>>6160787
QM approves your intent behind the wording for
>Majjikkal
Magic of all schools and levels is open to you. The difficulty is in finding spell copies and/or tutors, and sourcing material components.

DND magic components are exorbitant at higher levels.
>Sequester, level 7, requires 5000GP worth of ruby dust

According to Toady's current balance sheet, https://rentry.org/2336mod9 , he doesn't even have 1 GP yet.

Spamfiring biggybiggy spells is not a real option even for the OPest of magicians.
>>
>>6160838
>>6160825
Clever.
>>
you know what? i concede
you got me with extreme long term benefits (something my wish was also designed to accomplish)
i will take regeneration (would be fine with luck tho)

could we use our endless blood supply to progress in carrionpede? (i think not but asking anyway)
>>
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>>6160850
I'll switch to regeneration so we have a consensus, putting it at 2 votes compared to 1 vote for everything else. Pleasure doing business with you.
>>
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UPDATED VOTE TALLY

CAMPAIGN
>Report to Dokk
Unanimous.

WEESH
>"Gimme high magikkal a-fitt-nifty, potent-all n profit-sensy"
>>6160387

>"Gimme un-limited benefitty-all potent-all for everfing."
>>6160067

>"LUKK"
>>6160067 (alt vote)
>>6160850 (alt vote)

>"Gimme ability ter permanently steal abilities!"
>>6160815

>>"Gimme fasttyyest, powfattest, endless regennyratgun."
>>6160850
>>6160851

WAT DO W/ BLEW BEWBZ AFTA WEESH
>RELEASE NO
>>6160051
>>6160075

>RELEASE YES
>>6160815

Anyone else who hasn't voted on any particular, 20hrs.
>>
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>>6160850
It is too stupid.

QM allows it.

Take half a day destroying yourself for 0.2 HHLM.

2 HHLM currently needed per upgrade point of TSCP IV.

Toady is supposed to train Carrionpede by drawing blood in combat; fighting himself like a schizo comes at a massive penalty.

No, we don't talk about Orc Fight Club.

Yes, we spend hours punching ourselves in the parking lot of Orc Fight Club.
>>
>>6160863
makes sense
can we get a TSCP IV progress update? its been a while
>>
>>6160864
[THOUSAND-SEGMENT CARRIONPEDE FOURTH MOULTING]
+2(/2)% Dodge, +7(/12)% Hit, +0(/12)Dmg
Gain Killseek 1 at 20/26: +1 unblockable physical damage per weapon
2 HHLM per point
Gain +8HP on completion

Current total bonuses from TSCP:
>+6% Dodge
>+25% Hit
>+18Dmg; must have at least one sturdy weapon for full effect; shiv yes, beerbottle no.
>>
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>>6160865
UNLOCKED PASSIVES
>OVERKILL 1
>Hits 1 additional nearby enemy for 1/3 of total damage and debuff output
>Transfers balance damage to nearby enemy when original target reaches 0HP

>+1 Weapon Slot, totalling 3
>Beastie Whapp does not occupy a weapon slot when used in TSCP
>>
You know, I just realized. We have THE perfect excuse to EVERYONE for why we regenerate now.
"I drank a weird potion from the guy that runs that fight pits. Made me regen like a mufugga. Tasted like shit tho."
It wouldn't even be a lie. We're just leaving out the fact that the regen from the potion isn't the same regen we have now, and that the potion expired :^)
>>
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>>6160869
>>
>>6160865
how many points do we have currently?
whats HHLM? different from HLM in what way?
>>
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>>6160876
Heroic LM = capable combatants; at least one weapon and armor proficiency, and larger hitpoint pool than civvies. May have lesser Skills. Orcs without leadership or specialization count; see Toady's grand entrance into the Orc Settlements. Level 1-3 Adventurers go here.

Higher Heroic LM: Usually monstrous combatants and higher level Heroes; opponents with even bigger HP caps, environmental passive advantage, AND worthwhile Skills. Level 4-7 Adventurers in Parties go here; anything after level 8+ counts even on solo.

The Green Cloaks that put down Toady were generated based on levels 7, 7, 8. The difference in damage and armor can be attributed to gear.

Toady is still not capable of taking on a coordinated Party face-on. Lesson learned.
>>
>>6160876
all HHLM gained from running the Sother Look ice dunjjon have been pumped in. Nothing since.
>>
>>6160825
More regeneration-centered thoughts that I quite literally had in the shower.
Likely bestows some amount of disease resistance, as our immune system is free to go absolutely insane on anything it perceives as a threat, because collateral damage isn't a thing when all the native cells you damage with your fire-and-forget cellular nukes just regenerate a second later. And the 'cellular nukes' themselves regenerate too.
May end up providing resistance to certain types of curses, depending on the nature of the individual curse. Will it help toady with his cursed wang, too? Possibly! We'll have to see, if the option ends up winning.
For a grosser thought, infinite vomit is now a possibility as our bile and stomach acid is replenished as soon as it vacates our system. A consolation for the cleanfreaks is that if we need to clean ourselves, we could literally boil ourself alive and come out almost 100% bacteria free! Watch your old skin slough off while squeaky clean NEW skin grows in its place!
And for a final thought, tattooing is nowhere near as permanent for us as it is everyone else. Want to change it? Just rip your skin off, and get it done over.
>>
>>6160043
>Report your findings to Dokk
>"Gimme fasttyyest, powfattest, endless regennyratgun."
>No
>>
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>by majority and market collusion
>"Gimme fasttyyest, powfattest, endless regennyratgun."

When you've just gotten within smelling distance of the Orc Settlements you get out Blew Bewbz' teacup.

You've won this at a massive hassle and risk to your skidmeats. It's too valuable. Anyone you meet is going to have a reason to yoink it off you and cash it. Da ShammyBoss and Seafood immediately come to mind.

So you're going to do it first.

"Ay. Wake up."

She comes out submissive as before. She got a little white cloth bra and skirt on now, not like it'd stop you.

As before, Daggy and GOLDIE are at her gut and throat the moment she solidifies. She can be totally subdued, but you don't trust like that.

You start to speak, but she holds her palms up Daggy cuts an eight of a fingerwidth into her froat. veeery slowly, motioning you to stop. She still doesn't understand you.

While you keep your guard up she scrapes a little soil for soot and salt and presses thumb to palm. Doesn't feel like she's up to anything against you, so you let her continue.

A short string of words, the thumb smears the soil, and she's done.Besemet used Spell-like ability {WISH} lvl9 to cast {COMPREHEND LANGUAGES} lvl1

This done she tilts her head at you, inviting you to speak.

"I'z heard frumma source dat yez a Efreek or a Jimmy. Yez hates bein anywunz buttbich n yez can make Weeshies. Dat tru."

She nods. She still can't speak the Route Commons or the local variant of Goblinois Poot Waa that you're using, but she gets you.

"I gotta Weesh. Gimme it n I'z let yer free. Gobb'z honner. lal "

She raises her hands again, the same gesture of submissive request.

Now she starts scraping the ground immediately in front of her, melts ice in it, and makes a small soilcastle. A squatty tower. With a nod from you she passes her hands over it. Besemet used {WISH} to cast {TONGUES} lv3

When she next speaks you hear the Goblinois in her voice. Her lips don't match the words at all, but you hear fine: it's the dialect of your dedd mobb, your original language.

>Spiffy.

"I'z grant yezzer weesh, and yez letz me gow, yez yez. When I'z hold up me 'anz n shew va blu fayah in muh peekies, sez yer weesh in many many minus wun. But yez muzt letty gow me arfta, yezzernah?"

"Yezzeryez. Gimme a few beatz."

You have her go back in her teacup, Pouch it, and get out Moar Oww for some help wording a selection of your upcoming possible {{{WEEESH}}}es perfect in seven words.

Then he gets Pouched, and Blew Bewbz is out.

She does her thing: the blue fire she makes from her palms crawls through the air, joining the fires in her peekers. Head tilt.

" Gimmuh va fasttyyest, powfattest, endless regennyratgun evarar!"
>>
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For a moment you're not sure what's happening: whether the blu fayah just ate up the world, or juzt your eyes. The weird shidd reaches in and through your being, rearranging sumfin fundamental not just in and about you, but under you.

You don't have the words to describe it, or any approximate concept approaching it. You juzt know yer meatz n guttz n noggz n dat harsh, dark place inside that tells you what you a r e are twisting sumn orfull.

You're convulsing, writhing on the ground before the blu fayah's done with you: whole pints of SKUMM KOATing comes out of you, for a start; then the Dewclaws Seafood grafted on you come out of your limbs, popping and flopping orf like rotty teefs; then the throbbing buggy glands in your armpits that's been slicking up your gear with eye watering STANKX; last, worst and most painful, your cock gives birth to a giant gray maggy worm the size of your forearm, with lotsy long thin reachy vein things everywhere.

The maggy worm actually fights to get back in and stay in, but whatever Blew Bewbz did surpasses it: the huuj maggy rotter is forced out, clutching gobbets of ripped giblets, mewing with rage.

Including the veinies still blindly flopping about trying to find and reach you, this thing might be one and half of your full body length, from tippy toe to poity poit.

You know what to do with it. Instinct.

>kellert wiv faya

Once she delivered on the {{{WEEESH}}} Blew Bewbz took the minute and half you spent writhing and struggling to fugg orf, accepting that you have given your word on the traditional bargain.

She leaves her teacup behind, probably as fanks for not raepen her.

Little did she know.

Anyway: you get out some liquid flammables from Pouchy, matches, and a mallet.

You splatt the uggli muvva starting with its veinies, methodically, thoroughly, until it's a big patch of trembly gray ooz on the floor. Then you scrape it all together with a shovel head, douse it, light it up.

Then moosh it to jam again, douse again, light again. For a thing that size it takes a lot of killing. When it finally stops moving you scoop the inert mess into an empty paint can with the shovelhedd, plonk the shovelhedd and mallet in, lid it, seal the lot fikky with sheeping tar, and Pouch it.

The moment you encounter something that might do the job, maybe a Whitey Cherch Chimney or sumfin, you're going to dump it in there n purjj the Godsdamned Hells out of it.

°°°

You sit and enjoy the euphoria for a good long Time, wanking absently.

You know without any reasoning yet with absolute certainty that you will never age, never die, and whatever this shit world throws at you you will allus grow back.

After a bit, you just stop wanking. You've never realized it, but behind the Gobby Horni you always had had been a great weight: D E A T H.

You are always Horni bcuz Death is allus near, allus ready to pick orf Gobby gretchinz.
>>
>>6161386
JESUS CHRIST. I thought I was onto something with the cock curse, but I didn't know it was THAT. That's fucking horrifying.
Somewhat interested to see what massive purging of impurities will do. The loss of other things in our kit is somewhat sad, but nothing we actually need now that we have absurd regen. And honestly, we can probably keep the monster parts we shed and implant 'em in a living weapon or somethin like that if we really want those features back. And dewclaws...well, those were just an organic replacement for something we cludged together anways. We can go back to the normal steel shit.
But yes, VERY excited to see what purging all that skumm koat will end up doing narratively. Sifu did seem to indicate it was a bunch of nasty build up from eating his kin. Wonder if it was blocking our pathways or some mystical bullshit like that.
>>
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Rolled 7, 15, 4, 9 = 35 (4d20)

Behind your will-to-pluppah sexdrive is the dread that in the next minute, the next moment, D E A T H will come and take it all away. A good bit of your selfishness and orneryness comes from the same place too: that the Bigg Dark will come soon, and take even the wretched little that you've managed to grabb and hold away forever, for good.

Now that D E A T H is no longer an issue, the compulsion to plupp n plupp loses most of its power, along with a lot of the selfish meanness you always thought was just your Goblin Nature.

It wasn't. It was always Death.

>Within the GS-as-homebrew-tabletop metanarrative
>Toady has been transferred from the domain of the Player/Principle: Chaos
>To the domain of the Player/Principle: Abundance

And you're better looking, too. All the burns, scars and whatnot you've collected in your short violent life is gone. Your skin is smoov as a baby's bumbum.

The meat on your bones is better, fuller; your bones feel stronk. You've never realized how much you've been abusing your body, how much everything and everyone else helped. You look and feel like what you would look like if you were born, raised, trained, and fed by a world that wanted you.

>Toady gains a retroactive 12HPcap to a current total of 42/42HP
>This will increase with time and physical growth
>Toady will no longer faint from traumashock at 0HP, but will remain conscious as he regenerates.
>Only total incapacitation at -(HPcap/2)HP will render him unconscious
>for 1 turn, lal

You're still caked in three fingerwidths of SKUMM and STANKX, there's still all kindsy baalskeet that needs seeing to, but you're completely free.

You spend the day crying as you begin to realize what that means.

>QM rollan the amount of soaps, solvents, flammables, and tools used to clean up
>14 Days Orf Remaining
>>
>>6161394
yup. thing is tho that seafood will likely notice we are different now... somehow. lets hope we can come up with something he will buy (i guess thats it with making dimmies too)
>>
>>6160760
Very true. Although to anyone familiar with cultivation, Toady probably just looks like he ingested ancient spring water filled with Five Years of Life Energy, giving him babyface and fixing his shit.
A shocking amount of cultivators are stuck with babyface for 100 years because of the alchemical items they love to abuse.
>>
>>6161397
should we reserve wish #2 for seafood? i dont want to but we might have to...
he could also notice a behavior change since we basically just ascended goblinhood
>>
>>6161402
Too early to say. First we gotta get her back. Then...we'll play it by ear. Mo Ao could always tattle.
>>
>>6161407
>Mo Ao could always tattle.
he could straight up tell seafood about the wish, in theory
>>
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Rolled 3 - 1 (1d4 - 1)

When you're done sobbing you pick up Blew Bewbz Teacup.

A tiny blue flame lights up in it, the same as the color of her eyes.

Without seeing any actual cue, you can feel it giving a head tilt.

"Nerr. Har bart a noo suita Qually Klujj Arma."

You're instantly fitted. Mostly. Iron hat, shoulderpads, chestplate, underriggz, yes, and nice too; bellycover, bottoms, shins, no.

>Spiffy

The blue flame dwindles real smol but doesn't wink out. You'll try asking for sumn else termarrer.

>15Dur QKA GETTY
>EPIC TRIFLE GETTY
>{WEESHLET} Teacuppy!
>Once a day Toady may use Besemet's Teacup to create a mundane item or extremely low magical utility-consumable of ~1GP value
>STUNKS balance sheet updated https://rentry.org/2336mod9

°°°

You make into the Orc Settlements whistling, the happiest you've ever been, even counting the time yer mobb managed to bag a Binny.

None of the Greenies really notice; most are too absorbed in day-to-day feuds and petty scrabbling.

Not you.

You head straight for Dokk's. Youve got clews.

>QM rollan whether if Dokk is in, or how many days away in his rounds
>>
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>>6161417
QM blocks your path.

Mo Ao will reveal nothing of his own accord; he is indifferent to the affairs of the Living unless his Lord takes explicit interest.

Currently, YWH considers Mo Ao a failed experiment; unless dire need arise he won't bother with a Dimm Wraith that can't cast or properly melee and can only employ Spell-likes in a half-assed way.

Mo Ao may guess that Toady has {WISH}ed for one of the things he had been asked to word, but he doesn't know which one.
>>
>>6161428
Lal, are we going to be what Jinx Finx purports to be; an eternally young goblin?
Or are we going to grow into Buddha-ogre or Buddha-troll?
>>
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Uptush is on duty today. The look on his face is priceless.

"Eyy, Bosser! Yer back! We herd yez wuz dedd!"

"Yer herd rong, lal. Whurrz Dokk."

"Colletten numbaz, lark uzzual. Back in two moon-ups, I fink."

Bizniz has been fine, from the way things look: one Take pile has just been cleared up, and another next to it just started. Your Droogz pilfer much less than all the In-Turns before, bcuz you've alreddy fedd n kitted them plenty. They're still behaving because they heerd yez wuz dedd, but they've not fully believed it. Yer too Bosser to have juzt died from a trot innawuddz. Theyz seen yer foit: their Bosser'z madd gudd at killen. They'd bet meals on you fighting almost anyone or anyfin face-ter-face one-ter-one.

Little do they know.

You pick a spot to lounge in and start grilling Uptush. While you do, you start kludging up new Dewclaws.

>1/3 of Hit over 100 is converted to direct damage
>12 Stuffs deducted per fight, to account for kludgey quality

"Howz I dedd. Wadju hurr."

"Dokk hurdd, told uz. Sed hiz old Droog wots yez wuz meetn dint come back frumva trottabout. Dokk'z been bummed az fugg since. Figgered if yez wuz widdim, n he dedd, meenz yuz dedd turr."

"Bet I ain't. Take a laaaader killen to punk me. Diddee say anerfin abart va sussy fukk he sent me arfta. Namer Clewfinda, a-lie-yez Jinx Finx."

"Narn on dat."

"Der foot scoutz might be recrootn soon. One of yez Droogz go mobb up widdem n see if yer can winkle anyfin from inside."

"Wotcher, Bosser."

Your Dewclaws are done.

"Aight. Mm art."

>14 Days Orf remaining
>2 Days before Dokk comes back from his rounds

[Day 1, WAT DO]

>Kick over Boogerloo's desk and call him out
>Boogerloo aren't SHIDD.

OR

>Wreck the Leaderboardz in the Arener

OR

>Go raid an Orc controlled Dunjjon
>QM 1d4 which one you find.

OR

>Go summere quiet and start fighting YERSELF like a Schizo
>Mebbe make yer own meat n bludd da offerenz to Guilty arfta dat
>HELL, provoke va bich den let her WINN
>See wut happenz

OR

>Go back to Sother Look Dunjjon's work camp
>Tell Gorrlovva yer knows what he didd
>He'z getting a benisacktomy unless he slots you with his ShammyTeem
>You're going snooping up the Shammy cuckchain on your own

OR

>ELS?

[R O L L]
>2D100

>>6161417
>>6161407
>>6161113
>>6160815
>>6160387
>>6160072

min 20hrs
>>
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>>6161466
Toady will grow according to his peak potential-by-birth.

But yes: some kind of Buddha is a good measure of his inner being.
>>
Rolled 8, 92 = 100 (2d100)

>>6161480
>Wreck the Leaderboardz in the Arener
i wanna farm some TSCP progress
(mebbe changing vote later. cant think gotta sleep now)
>>
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>>6161494
: )
>>
Rolled 72, 87 = 159 (2d100)

>>6161480
>Go back to Sother Look Dunjjon's work camp
Well, if we can't give Seefuds BLEW BEWBS, at least we can givem what he asked fer.
>>
Rolled 21, 55 = 76 (2d100)

>>6161480
>Go back to Sother Look Dunjjon's work camp
>Tell Gorrlovva yer knows what he didd
>He'z getting a benisacktomy unless he slots you with his ShammyTeem
>You're going snooping up the Shammy cuckchain on your own
>>
>>6161428
>Once a day Toady may use Besemet's Teacup to create a mundane item or extremely low magical utility-consumable of ~1GP value
Was rereading the last update, came across this.
So are both mundane items and magical consumables limited to the 1GP value, or just the magical consumables?
Well, not that it particularly matters. I have some ideas to abuse this since there's no mass or dimensions limit listed.
>Summon 1gp worth of totally mundane, low-quality stone. Right on top of someone.
>Summon 1gp worth of Totally Normal Air for fresh air in a donjon or to create a sudden windburst.
>Summon 1gp worth of Seawater to flood a muthafucka.
>Summon 1gp worth of Hydrogen and light a match.
>>
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Rolled 4, 5, 4, 3, 4, 8 = 28 (6d8)

>>6161823
Anything you might ask for is limited to 1GP.

>Imma abuse this like a redheaded stepchild
That's the spirit!

>1GP worth of stones/seawater/styrofoam
The last time trade values were established, 2§tuffs : 1Ꮆrain , an absurd ratio hand-waved away for being the result of local conflict.

Enough time has passed. QM rerollan trade values.

1: How many Stuffs is worth 1 Grain
2+3: Grains to Silver
(4+5)÷1.5+(6): Silver to Gold
>>
>>6161823
>QM rerollan trade values
look what you made him do! grrrrrr
>>6161831
so we wont get another big wish?
>>
>>6161835
Actually it works out in our favor with the teacup if it takes more Stuff to equal the value of a gold piece.
>>
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>>6161823

NEW TRADE VALUES:

Stuffs : Grain
4 : 1

Grain : Silver
9 : 1

Silver : Gold
13 : 1

13 x 9 x 4 ≈ 468 worth of Stuffs a day.

In QM's mind, Stuffs has the stablest value because it is utility value; a decent fulltang dagger or usable pickaxe are both 5 Stuffs each.

An irl full brown-bottle of unlabeled thinner, 750ml, might be worth 4 Stuffs. Thinner is so useful, especially if it can also theoretically be drunk like Toe Bend's Thinneride.

Toady can potentially summon 117 brownbottles of thinner a day.

>SUMMON IT ON TOP OF A WRIGGER
It either appears in the Teacup and you take it out, or you overturn the Teacup and it comes out at drop speed, accelerating 10ms^-2. If you want to drop it on a WRigger you'll need to have elevation on him first, then if in combat, roll 2 defense to do the action.

>ROKKS FALL LOLLLLL
Sand is near worthless in terms of Stuffs. A full sandbag, as filled by a goblin, might be 12ilb or 5kg; Humies make 30-50 ilb sandbags.

A full Gobby sandbag is worth 1 Stuffs.

"SUMMONNN SANDBAAAAG !!!" using earlier maffs will get you 5616ilbs of sand. Try not to get caught in it, lol.

"hrnnn. then SUMMONNN LAVAAAAA !!!"
This one will get you probably just one glop of rapidly cooling lava.

While Stuffs holds utility-value, Greenies value their skidmeats much moar than utility. The Teacup is partially keyed to this racially rooted idea, since it is keyed to Toady. Anything that is immediately as-is dangerous will be scaled astronomically, likely over their actual market value.

TLDR: the Teacup will likely not be able to make pufferfish juice, enriched uranium, or live adult black kryats, even if Toady encounters and knows how to name them.

"SUMMARNNNN HYDROJJAAAAN!!!"
Until Toady gets familiar with volatile gaseous alchemic reagents, he has no way to do this. 1GP worth of paint thinner is doable, because he has encountered and fucked around with it.

Apprenticeship with an established alchemist might open doors.
>>
>>6161843
Fair enough. A shitload of water (which is virtually free) or an even bigger shitload of normal air (which IS free) is doable then.
Poisoning a village well with a bunch of diseased rotting meat, which is virtually worthless to everyone and doesn't pose an immediate threat, may be possible.
Thermite is unknown to Toady, but is made out of extremely abundant materials. Aluminum and Rusted Iron, dusted and mixed together. The alchemical job is real tempting for this alone, since he could just summon each part individually and make a heapload of thermite to burn shit at 4500°F.
>>
>>6161843
can we just be smart and wish for 1gp? (alternatively stuff with the value of 1gp)
>>
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>>6161848
Yes. Toady just has to encounter it, then invest time finding out the formula.

Narratively, Toady still knows nothing of what we've discussed, so he will at least be taking days just experimenting, if the Teacup is used for nothing else.

>ask for sand
>ask for water
>ask for thinner
>ask for Graincoin
>ask for Silver
>ask for gold
>ask for mmmm STINGYSTINGER (he gets a dedd stinger with denatured poison sacs
>ask for NOIVES
>ask for rokks
>ask for shiny jool rokks
>ask for pickaxes
>ask for Helff Potty
>ask for a Effigy Shammy Charm (a voodoo doll with no powers appears)
>ask for a biggy Shammy Majjikk Stikk (a big fancy stikk appears)
>ask for fresh air
>ask for shidd

It will take ±15 days mucking about with the Teacup for Toady to cover what's on here.

please don't put any real actual formulas on here. Nothing that will put us on Moar lists than we are already. Please, please.
>>
>>6161851
course you can.

But only after Toady has spent enough time fucking around.

Everything just discussed here will have been tried by Toady.
>>
>>6161856
Day one.
A piece of paper with all the limitations and conditions of the teacup listed out, in a language that mo ao can read.
Saved toady experimenting.
>>
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>>6161835
>ohnoesss
>no moar Beeg Weesh?
Besemet has buggered orf. She never expected a Greenoid to thrash her on hometurf, and it happened.

She did not expect to be not raept if at the mercy of any Greenoid, and it happened.

She did not expect Greenoids to know what she is or about {WISH}; this terrifying red one does, somehow.

You have been very gallant for a member of a race of rotters.

Now that the little cozy (noun) she has in Sother Look is no longer safe, she's orf.

If Toady had wished for Potent-All or Majjikk-All or LUKK, he would have the presence of mind to shove her back inna Pouch.

Perfect Regen, being involuntary, kicked in and started purging him before he could act on his plann.
>>
>>6161863
:(
i blame power gamer anon
>>
>>6161862
Toady can ask for this after several days, after encountering a few failed wishes.

The full list of limitations might be an industrial sized bogroll in fontsize 10, if it listed specifics.


Also: Mo Ao will then know what Toady has and how it works, and Dimmu Queen is listening in at crackly low fidelity.

QM invites you to reconsider.
>>
>>6161867
Hmm. Alright. What if we asked it for soundwaves matching toady's voice, which explains what it does at toady's normal speaking volume, in goblinese.
>>
Second thoughts. A picture book that explains the teapot's limits with diagrams that even an idiot like Toady can understand.
And then, the day after, a picture book that can help even an idiot like toady learn how to read Common.
>>
>>6161866
There there.

QM thinks it pans out about equal.

LUKK has the least direct power of all the proposed wishes, so an additional 50% WEESH buffs it.

The Potent-all and Majjikk-All will inevitably make an enemy out of YWH; Toady will be needing that 50% WEESH real hard to survive his Master.

now that things are set in stone, QM thinks LUKK and Potent-All would have been the most fun to do narratively.

LUKK would have eventually involved the Ruling Principles of GSverse; all the Players want a piece of that Goblin Special Unaligned Unit in Chaos' Domain that is unsubject to the Chance dice, just like the OP DMPC self-insert GoblinSlayer.
>>
>>6161869
Toady has no idea of sound waves, a baseline of modern science.

But remind QM again if you wish to try this in 15gamedays.
>>
>>6161876
we can go looking for another genie at some point right? (in like 1+ year out of game time probably lol)
>>
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>>6161892
It is possible.

>the number of dunjjons you have to find and reach the BossRoom of.
>multiplied by
>the RNG required for the Boss to be a Efreet/Genie out of all possible creature templates

Finding a needle in a needlestack.

If the Droogz conspire and agree, QM will DunjjonGen like a MF between Seafood's campaign objectives.

Gudd lukk.
>>
>>6161905
are they only in dungeons?
it wouldnt hurt grinding dungeons anyway since we are unkillable now so its just free loot and LM
idea: we tell seafood about the wish since he will notice anyway, but tell him we found a "scroll of wish" and we wanted to test it out before bringing it to him but it was one time use which we didnt even consider because dumb goblin
this will make seafood interested in dungeons with their powerful loot and strange nature. he will want to get a wish of his own. the one advantage we have over him is that he knows little to nothing about this world.
how does that sound?
>>
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>>6161929
The ones roaming about out of dunjjons are in the lower heavenly realms. A veeery few muck about among mortals regularly in disguise; these are default wary and eccentric by nature, and often greater in rank than Besemet within their own societies.

Not being proficient in majjikk, Toady will be extremely disadvantaged in this hunt.

To address your other keshchan:

>hey Sweetfudds
>Iz found a WEESH scroll while raidn a dunjjon
>but I didn't know what it wuz n fired it
>it gaves me guldd, see? GAULD!!
>mebbe we cudd go find moar weesh scrollz?

"...Tudi. How did you know it was a Wish scroll. How did you read it."


QM reminds anon that Seafood hung Toady up by his nose hairs for half an hour, just because Toady asked him to Bad End Kivvin the Kid Rogue.

Imagine Seafood's reaction if he detects that Toady is trying to redirect his attentions to dunjjon clearing.

If you wish to steer Seafood towards your purposes, it must be planned and executed reeel subtle. Just baiting him like you did to get a new GIGA GLUGGZ will end with a hefty pricetag attached. For a nigh indestructable distorted-space container that can hold 4 Smol Helff Potts, YWH's pricetag was the head or staff of an Orc ShammyBoss. Weigh that in real terms for a bit.

Also, remember on the journey towards Plague Town, when Toady suggested killing moar people on the road for LMs to feed Seafood's Pall Body, to save time. Seafood agreed it was a gudd idee, then turned right around and commanded Toady to do it.

A 3.5 year old Greenoid trying to squeeze a 2800 year old Immortal is going to backfire. The combined Level, Wis and Int difference is almost exactly one Universe.
>>
>>6161943
ok fine... that would be too easy
what we could get away with probably, is saying that the dungeon boss granted us a wish for defeating it, but we had to use it then and there.
now what, Mr. Calamity-Corrupted Corpsepearl? he can then decide for himself if he wants to take a look at dungeons more closely
>>
>>6161929
Also note:

If you somehow manage to find another Efreet/Genie and FAIL, the first thing that will definitely happen after Toady gets torn to pieces over and over is his original wish getting unwished.

QM rebukes anon's suicidally blinding greed.
>>
>>6161945
QM can include this in the next vote.

If the Droogz all throw their hands in, Toady will approach Seafood wiv hiz cunnern plann.
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>>6161948
i dont want to keep you from starting to write the update, but i have one more question...
seafood cant harm us directly thanks to the contract we made at the beginning
but since toady cant be harmed technically does that mean seafood could make us explode as a punishment or for experimental purposes? we would still feel pain after all...
>>
>>6161878
To put it in Toady terminology.
"Make speaky sounds like me dat exshplain wotcher do and what yer limme taters are, in languidge I can unnastan, at aboot the vahlume I'm usin roight now."
Although the picture book explanation is probably better.
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>>6161951
>Seafood carnt harm uz fanks to his Seafood prommiz
>We'z allus safe, apart frum beatingz
>roit?

YWH can't kill or harm Toady within the oath, correct, but disowning him is permissible if: betrayal is committed, a cardinal rule of the sect is broken (none for YWH; Supreme Heterodox), or a very significant failure (very usual for Evil sects; YWH is an Evil Cultivator).

After getting disowned, the usual Evil Sect retributions may be inflicted. How pissed YWH is will determined whether Toady just gets a sword through the heart or turned to ragu; how well he can play dedd will determine whether Toady escapes YWH for good, or gets a whole new dungeon dimension created juuust for him.

Punishments couched as discipline (thrashing) or training (Unworldly Bride) is permissible within the oath; as an Apex Deviant, YWH's boundaries for chastisement and training are very wide apart. Some measure of picrel is always on the menu, if YWH knows "it ultimately helps him".

YWH will end the Sifu-Tudi relationship on good terms if: Toady has learned all he can as a Disciple, has served him well, and YWH perceives he has no moar use for him.
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>>6161972
edit:
Toady won't escape YWH for good while YWH is still in GSverse.

Toady needs to lay low from him for a good long time.
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>>6161951
>since we carnt *accherly* get harmed
>does it mean Seafudds can explode us over and over????

Only if it is couched as discipline or training. Pain is still pain, even if it leaves no marks.

That said, now that he has P E R F E C T regeneration, there may be Forbidden Arts available to Toady either as Martial Arts, Alchemic Supplements, or Sorcerous Tools.

Toady just needs to come clean and get punished first, and likely toil and suffer to begin FORBIDDENMAXXING.
>>
>>6161984
>FORBIDDENMAXXING
sounds cool. we could easily do rituals that require us to self harm in any capacity.
first we need to gain relative pain immunity, perhaps even become a masochist.
toady has to start continuously injuring himself. just light cuts/stabs at first, but escalating to jumping down cliffs over and over again and getting mauled by various monsters for "fun"
>>
>>6161480
>Go raid an Orc controlled Dunjjon
>>
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QUEST POST

You don't waste time: despite what Dokk prefers, YOU prefer your scores settled.

Gorrlovva tried to volunteer you to the foot scouts to get you killt. You carnt be killt, now, but it'z the thought that counts.

You counting all the bitz you might cut orf him while jogging there, and jogg farsta.

You know where Sother Look is relative to the Foit Pitt Outfitters; once you're out of the thoroughfares you start running, sprinting.

>well well wellllll

You can sprint hard as you like, long as you like, you only get half-puffed at worst. You can keep up top speed in bursts, and not-quite-top-speed indefinitely. If you do a full sprint and keep it up until you can't, you only need to slow down a couple beatz, and you're good again.

>Mebbe
>I durnt even needter eet?
>r sleepp??

This changes a lot of things.

You're going to find out what they are.

All of them.

°°°

The run to Sother Look takes two Times.

It's changed.

A lot of the tents are fallen or gone. From what you can immediately see of the holding pitts, they're frozen over, more than half full of white snowy shardy ice.

A little bit into the camp and you have to start digging the kludge Dewclaws on your feet to keep from skidding.

>no one's salting

Where the UnderBossers' kips and tents used to be are a few log huts kludgily mortared with strawed mud, no windows, smoking from leaky holes at the top.

One hand on the Whapp, you kick one of the doors hard; doesn't open.

So you cut it open. It'z been wedged shut from the inside. There's only two Orcs in here, bumming; tally slats laying about in the corners, a pile of firewood, dry food, and a firemound, stingily nursed.

The cold wind storming in behind you nearly kills the fire. You kick some wood junk lying about to cover the hole you made; one of the Orcs passes you moar, to help you.

They had both wanted to trounce you, but your kit and your manner slowed them down just enough to think things fru. Yup: it's too cold and they're too starved to start shit.

"Whurrz Gorrlovva. We gart bizniz."

The one that helped you just shruggz. The other is sulkily trying to keep the fire going. He fails.

You get out matches and candle stubs from Pouchy; the sulky one takes them without thanks, tries again.

"What happened ter va diggz."

Sulky ignores you, busy. Shruggy just shrugs. You consider using Noiffy to make them squeal, but your heart's not really in it.

They're already cucked by cold and hunger; a stab in the thigh won't get much else out of them.

You pass some Thinneride around, generous by Greenie standards, not really by yours: you have an idea what to ask the Teacup for next, when the blu fayah grows back.

When they get some gudd gluggs down you arsk again.

"Talk to me while I'z being noice, griggerz. Wot hapnt ter Gorrlovva. Wot hapnt ter va diggz."

Shruggy speaks first.
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"Many many moon-ups past va cold frum va dunjjon upped sumn narsty. Wind, too; blew yer flat if yer dint bend frunty on it. Hard ter werk.

"First the Bossers called Break, sed ter wait it art. It just got worse each moon. Couple days inter va Break the Gobbz wot dint fukkorf wuz frozzd dedd.

"Shammies no help; fat gudd dey are. No wun wuz tuffy enuff to plow in, so nuffin wuz cort. Frum va dunjjon dat iz, heh heh; da Catchy Laddz and Splorry Laddz cort a Break, n da Bossers n UnderBossers cort hott shitt.
"

"Heh." From Sulky. Agreement.

You catch something salient in what you heard.

"Cort shitt fer wot. Frum who."

"Unno. Deffo frum va Shammy Tally Gitz, ter start. But va ShammyBoss musta heerd bart it after many moon-ups 4 . Arfta dat, va Shammies n werk crooz startid ter get pulled frummere, plugged ter va ovva dunjjonz. Tuffy nuttz like uz gart told ter stay put n wach, see if annerfin change. It darnt change. If it keeps worsnen few we mart harvta pull, too.."

"How's va beasties inva dunjjon. Biggah."

"A few Teemz tried, at va start. The critters got fewer, then gone; va bigg'unz stopped showing, even in the middy danger zone. The cold's worse inside, if yer can bleevit."

"Any Shammies abart here I can hassle."

"Yer, bart deyz In-Turnz n Try-Knees. They's house is farva back, well inner va wuddz twordz dat way. Outta va ice zone. They gotta wudd tower peeking twordz Sother Look here; find dat, find dem."

[WAT DO]
You still have most of the day. 14 Days Orf remaining, 2 Days till Dokk shows up at WERKZ UV EVVIL

>bash in da Sother Look dunjjon, hard mode
>dis looks innerestun

OR

>Ask Shruggy and Sulky about the other dunjjon werkz they know about, and how to get there.
>You're going to bother *those* shammies

OR

>Head for the Shammy post observing Sother Look
>bully the Shammy Try-Knees there for info
>if they even got any

OR

>ELS?
>Arener, Boogerloo, Guilty, Shizo Self-fight?

[NO ROLLZ]

>>6162010
>>6161993
>>6161956
>>6161526
>>6161113
>>
>>6162095
>bash in da Sother Look dunjjon, hard mode
>dis looks innerestun

I think this is a good opportunity to get absolutely insane reputation gain. If we're the ONLY guy able to still get in there and get out, we'll be known as the hardest goblin on the face of the planet. Plus, it gives us a chance to test out all the pros and cons of our regeneration.

As an aside, that stamina shit is insane. All the lactic acids are getting drained away six seconds after they form. Toady's gonna have to adopt a new sprinting strategy where he propels himself forward as hard as he can, shattering his legs in the process, and landing ONLY after six seconds have passed and his legs have had time to heal up to repeat the process. That way, he can go maximumer speed at all times.
>>
>>6162095
i dont think we should care that much about gorlovva
what the dungeon is doing is none of our concern. we have no way of doing anything about it anyway since blew bewbz fucked off
so i am once again asking to
>go ter arener n farm sum LM
>>6162112
that would draw a bit too much attention to us i feel like. so much in fact that OverBoss might see us as a threat. either way, keeping a lower profile is our best course of action
and if its really that cold in there we could just freeze to an ice block in there (whats likely not prevented by our regen)



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