i've realized that i don't actually like being a hateful asshole. however - i've spent so much time doing it. and not just by myself, but with others on this site. just kind of being an annoying dick because i was angry at myself and angry at the world and people.but now i'm not. i don't really know if it's a temporary phase and if eventually ill become ill with hatefulness again. i guess im just at a point in my life where i don't want to be like that anymore. but i also came to the idea that humans like being hateful together, for some reason. we like hating things in groups and i don't even know why.i wish i could just talk to someone about my feelings. in truth, i've felt miserable these past few weeks. i wish i had a life and friends. i wish i could just talk to people without them revealing some weird part of themselves that is mean and spreading it to me.do yunno what i mean? i wish people just liked talking about things and their day and what ideas interest them that doesn't have to do with circlejerking about politics or the world. i honestly don't give a fuck about the world.
